For the life of me, I can't understand why people think it's appropriate to ask a couple when they're going to have a baby. For one thing, it's intrusive as hell. You might as well just say, When are you guys going to be ditching the condoms? Secondly, you don't know what people may want for themselves. Some couples don't want to have children––some women definitely don't want children––and that's totally okay.
After Redditor sirous38 asked the online community, "What is the question you always avoid answering?" people told us all about the questions they get that irk them the most.
Take this question.
Why are you still single?
To which this person replied...
Because dating in 2021 seems like a nightmare, I've been cheated on enough. Plus, if I don't even like myself how can I expect anyone else to?
And this question (the one I just spoke about):
When are you going to have a baby?
To which this person replied...
I'm the father of a five-year-old and always get "When are you having another?"
I don't know, when they stop dying inside my Mrs? Your guess is as good as mine.
And this question...
What are you thinking right now?
To which this person replied:
Ugh, seriously I hate that question. It feels so invasive. If I wanted to tell you what I was thinking, I would. Otherwise, let me exist with my personal thoughts.
How about this one?
I am partially colourblind and everyone I say it to asks me the question, "What colour is this?" After a while, I don't even say that I am colourblind.
And how about this question?
"How was school today?"
Like bruh, I've been sitting in front of a computer for the past 4 hours.
To which this person replied:
It was painful to answer before the pandemic anyway.
This is a big one.
Why don't you talk?
To which this person replied:
That one is like a vicious circle.
If you were building confidence or comfort to say something, that is basically pulled it all away from you just with the question.
Why do people ask this?!
"Ooh you were in the Army, didja ever kill anybody???"
Just stop asking that, please.
"Why are you so quiet?"
Because I spent my entire childhood either being guilt-tripped, mocked, or outright taken advantage of for having the friggin AUDACITY of having a personality and social needs, and now the only place I can actually articulate myself is with strangers on the internet because I can take the time to think of a response and type it out rather than being put on the spot by people who, in all honesty, probably don't give a s*** about what I think or say either way. At least on the internet, I'm not in the same room when the person reading my responses mentally checks out. That's why.
It might help if people thought before they spoke. That could save all of us some degree of embarrassment and discomfort.
Have some questions you hear on the regular that you're sick and tired of hearing? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments section below.
And those tiny little towns can seriously pack a punch.
You might only drive through for about 15 minutes, maybe fill up the gas tank and grab a drink from the corner store, but that's all it takes to catch a vibe.
There's something about the buildings, the people, or the desolate quality of the entire place that's enough to make your skin crawl.
Some Redditors took a moment to describe the towns that freaked them out completely.
sorvivordemigod asked, "What are some of the Scariest Small Towns in America?"
Plenty of people described the places that legitimately seemed haunted. Some people even treated readers to the backstory and broader context of the creepy place left behind.
Other times, they could just tell.
"Carpenter, WY. It's a super tiny town. I've only driven through once, so I can't say it's super scary, definitely creepy though. The one time I was there there was nobody outside except this little girl outside the town hall that just stared at us while we drove by, shaking her head the whole time."
"On the way out of town we did see a kid playing basketball in his backyard, so that mitigated the creepiness of the little girl."
Remnants of a Cult
"Rulo, Nebraska. The town has a real haunted vibe to it. Lots of abandoned buildings with no one around."
"Plus it was home to a Christian Identity cult lead by Michael Ryan in the early 1980's that tortured and murdered several members. Ryan was sentenced to death for the murders but ended up dying in prison before the sentence was carried out."
"Rod Colvin wrote a book about this cult called 'Evil Harvest.' "
Lived In, But Empty
"Yellowdog, PA. Here's one account."
"I guess it's not super scary, but one of my elementary school friends grew up there and I probably stayed there every other week for like ten years. They eventually moved out. It took maybe five years later and the whole place was abandoned."
"We went to visit not that long ago and it's fu**ing creepy. There are still toys and stuffed animals just lying around. The houses are in bad shape but they're all still standing, and you can absolutely just go in and have a look around."
"Hillsville, PA aka Zombieland. Some crazy local legends brewed up about that place over the years. Involving lighting a torch in the woods to begin your journey, a haunted bridge, graveyard & murder house."
"Was really fun to go there back in High school. Theres a really creepy underpass decorated in hundreds of statues of mother Mary before going up what seems a 90 degree incline to actually get up into the hills."
Other people explored creepy towns that drew their horror from more secular sources. The actual behavior of people and other man-made entities can sometimes be as scary as old legends or haunted ghosts.
A Fleet in Pursuit
"Colorado City, AZ if you are not known there, you will be followed by several white SUVs." -- brockdaywatch
"First place that came to my mind! You get a weird vibe driving through and seeing all these half built compounds and people just stare at you as you drive by" -- libtech1776
Let It Burn
"My GPS re routed me through Gary Indiana last week. There was a literal car fire in a neighborhood it routed me through."
"Seemed to have been burning for a while...no one around. 👍"
Guardians of the Tunnel
"Hawthorne Nevada was a very strange place. It has a navel base in the middle of the desert and a lake called walker lake that's rumored to have a tunnel for subs to go to the pacific."
"When I drove thru and stopped for gas there everyone wouldn't stop staring and it just gave me a vibe."
Finally, some people could point to a very true, historic reason for the way a place turned out. Natural disasters and other mass tragedies laid the groundwork for total eeriness.
"Newtown, MO. Part of St Charles I'm pretty sure. Place is eerie. The trees line up too perfectly. No noise. No dogs barking. No kids playing. Nobody just waking around."
"The houses are all less than 10 years old but nearly identical and made to look like 1910s-20s bungalows. Landscaping is pristine. Then 'downtown' there are frikkin massive animal statues and the buildings all look like the Parthenon."
"It feels like those videos demonstrating the effects of a nuke, if a place could feel like that."
"I'm surprised no one mentioned Picher, OK."
"When the Tornado went through in 2008, it destroyed a majority of the town. However, it was known for their piles 'chat' a residue that comes from Zinc mining. Little did the realize how incredibly toxic this was as it was used for building roads, sidewalks, and sandboxes."
"Kids of the area would even play in the piles unbeknownst to them the dangers associated with it. Eventually there would be an influx of cases of children having learning disabilities and a school guidance counselor sought to have the tests done to check for lead poisoning. The town became a toxic waste ground and the EPA had to force residences to evacuate the area."
"Going into that town know, it's nothing more than a grave-site - this video shows a documentary filmmaker (Dan Bell) walking through the town and showing what remains. Truly scary and at the same time depressing."
"Cairo, Illinois. Drove through a few times with my boyfriend when he was a truck driver. Had a very spooky and dark feeling to it. Only place open was a subway.. and all the lights in the parking lot were out."
"I looked the town up and apparently a flood had come through and destroyed most of the town years before. What was left was probably the most unwelcome, eeiry place I've had the dissatisfaction of visiting."
There's no doubt you've passed through just such a town in your day.
The question then becomes, did it pique your interest enough to go back, or spook you so much you never will?
It can be hard bringing a new person into your pet's life.
Reddit user, u/sugar-soad, wanted to hear about when you had to make the hardest choice of your life when they asked:
When The Partner Tries To Impose On The Pet's Territory
Your pet becomes just as much as part of your house as you do, forming their own favorite spots to lay down and finding their favorite chew toys. When you have a romantic partner, especially a new one, who comes in and thinks they have a greater stake in your home life when you've only just started dating then you know there's a problem.
Don't Come For The Dog
True story. I'm paraphrasing. My friend had his girlfriend spend the night at his house. While he was making her breakfast she began complaining about his "nasty dog". My friend told her, "You should stop complaining, the dog lives here and you don't".
They broke up a week later.
Don't Try To Outlive Cats
I remember him saying my diabetic cat needed to go so he could get a dog. We weren't even living together. I looked him dead in the eyes and said. "My cat will outlive this relationship" considering she was really sick at the time he said it was unlikely and stormed off.
We broke up 6 years ago and my cat is still going strong.
Look At The Time
Not me, but my sister was dating a guy who angrily accused her of loving her elderly cat more than him. She said she did -- she had had him for 14 years and they had only been dating for about a month.
Guess he wasn't expecting that because he just kind of shut up and left the house.
When The Partner And Pet Don't Mix
Sometimes, a person and an animal don't mesh well. That's the reason so many pet adoption services do so many background checks, home visits, and interviews, to make sure the person and pet being paired up are going to do well together for hopefully the next several years. Bringing a new person into their lives can sometimes lead to bad vibes rubbing off one another.
Fighting Like...Well, Like Cats And Dogs
Two friends of mine dated seriously years ago. Girl's cat had jealousy issues and peed on guy's shoes. Guy put cat in the bathtub and pissed on cat. Relationship didn't last much longer.
Edit: I really should have mentioned that he was wearing the shoes when the cat did this.
Animals Know. Oh, They Know All Right.
The dog chose me lol I divorced my husband and his dog destroyed his house and sadly wouldn't eat properly or do anything but stress until he came to live with me and my dog. But to be fair, my ex is terrible at pets. He just kept him outside all day and night with no interaction. The dog is a Great Dane and at the time it was me, my toddler and my dog in a little town house but we gladly took in the big guy over keeping him alone and miserable with his actual owner.
Spiders Aren't For Everyone, But, Wow. What A Jerk.
I bred tarantulas professionally for a few years. Most were in a specially designed shed outside, but I had a few in the house. Was totally upfront with people when dating, and if it was a dealbreaker, then no hard feelings.
I dated this one guy for a few months, but we'd always go out or to his [house]. I didn't really think much of it. Around month 4, he started getting annoyed and one day, straight up asked me how long it was gonna take to "sell a few spiders".
I thought he was talking about my actual job, so I was like, "oh, I sell them in bulk to a supplier. He's coming round on Tuesday, actually." And my bf was so relieved, but I couldn't really understand why.
So the dude comes round on the Weds and sees the tarantulas in the house and goes on an [absolute] tirade about how I lied to him, how I've broken his trust, and how he's gonna need time to heal. NGL, I just burst out laughing. I was like, "you really thought I was gonna give up my job for you?"
Well that was apparently not the reaction he expected. He stormed out, yelling about how I was such a dumb b-tch for not realising how great he was lmao. Tried to crucify me on social media, but he just ended up looking like an idiot lol
Then There's Those Truly Awful Reasons...
You'll know the moment. It clicks, right away. You have to choose either the life of your beloved animal or staying in a romantic relationship with a person who clearly has no interest in keeping them safe.
The choice should be easy.
You Can Just Tell
I found out my girlfriend was hitting my dog when I wasn't around. I left her and she was unable to admit that was the reason. I guess answering the question of "what happened to you guys?" With "oh he found out I was secretly hurting his dog" might make for awkward conversations.
How did you find out?
You can generally tell when someone's been hurting a dog or a cat based on their behavior towards that person. Like, if a dog that was previously super excited and happy to meet new people or interact with people that you bring over is now skittish and hides from specific people, or is suddenly aggressive towards them, there's a good chance that they've been hurt by that person or have seen that person hurting someone else (ex: a child).
I have a cat that has even placed himself between me and something that he thought was going to hurt me. It was the vacuum cleaner, but the thought was still there. Animals know when something is scary or dangerous, and will usually let you know how they feel about it in their own way.
...Dump That Chick.
I found out that me ex had been talking to her mom about putting my dog down while I was at work and just telling me she ran away or something. Before that moment I never would have thought I could have violent feelings towards a women. But now I know in my heart that there's a serious possibility I would have hurt her had she actually done it.
On the surface, it can't be easy choosing between a human and an animal. It might feel wrong in some ways. However, if you're a truly good pet owner, you know that their life and comfort matters just as much as any other living thing.
Even if it means going single for a little while longer, do what's best for every individual involved.
In the words of every millennial who was once on Tumblr, adulting is hard. I’ve been a legal adult for nine years now, and I still don’t fully understand taxes. I just let TurboTax do its thing and hope for the best. They REALLY need to teach that sh*t in schools.
But I’m not the only adult who still feels like a child! I think a lot of us can relate to that. And to be honest, we can be very unprepared for what life throws at us.
The worst part is the cruel awakening that we actually have to, you know, do stuff on our own.
Choosing things is hard.
Having to not only make important decisions by myself (I expected that much) but also having to do so in a timely fashion uninhibited by indecision.
Having to make decisions is such a big thing for me. Intellectually, of course I knew I'd have to make decisions. I just want ready too make them without knowing the consequences and at the speed of life.
Errands eat up sooo much time.season 2 your shoe's untied GIF by SpongeBob SquarePants Giphy
How much time you spend just doing stuff.
"Oh need to replace my tire and that's over by the store, so while I replace the tire I can do some errands and I'll save time and be home in no time" three hours later "Okay just one more errand before I head home"
Also how putting off a small task just a couple days in a row can quickly amount to a longer chore/responsibility later. "Eh I can just leave this in the sink, get to it later before bed" x 2 days "Why is this grime caked onto this plate still I've been scrubbing for 10 minutes straight!"
That’s what delivery is for.
Being sick and having to care for yourself. Like when you were younger your parents would get the medicine, or the medicine cabinet would just be stocked all the time, etc. But here I am with a cold having to build up the energy to go to the supermarket to buy some asprin and throat lozenges all by myself.
Underwear gnomes are the true pests.
The endless cleaning. I had chores when I was a kid, but I had zero clue how much actual work went into keeping house. I cleaned my house this morning and by midweek it'll be a war zone of pet hair, crumbs, and dust. I don't even have kids wtf it's like the underpants gnomes show up when I'm asleep and mess my house up.
Another sh*tty thing is the crushing loneliness that comes with adulthood. Why didn’t they tell us that we would have no friends after the age of 25?
The only thing I miss about school.motivating bart simpson GIF Giphy
A lack of community. Growing up you have your elementary school. Each day you see your friends and participate in activities together. Sometimes they move away and sometimes you do, but it largely stays the same through high school and middle school. Flash forward to adulthood and you're just alone. You want to make friends IRL, but have no idea how to go about doing it without seeming creepy, desperate, or god knows what.
This is really hard when you are not overtly religious so you cannot join a religious community. My friend and I talk about this from time to time, it's arguably the hardest thing to deal with in life. It gets worse the longer you live, as you know you are outliving your generation.
The reason why I have cats.
You can go days on end without having to speak to a single person, at first it's a dream come true, after about 2 months you start talking to your toaster to pad the silence while waiting for your toast.
I literally haven't spoken to someone beyond saying thank you/no when buying groceries in months. At first it felt kind of freeing and now it's just kinda sad.
Ditto on this advice.
The inevitably of your parents dying. My dad just passed away and I'm 25...no one could have prepared me I guess.
I feel you. Mine passed away back in August when I was 28. There's nothing you can do to prepare for it, and I'm afraid I have no magic words to make it better. Just know you're not alone. I'll never say it gets "better," but it eventually starts to suck less and your hard days get a little less frequent. I'm so, so sorry.
The sad fact is, you have to start fending for yourself with no one to help you. And that’s terrifying.
Saving money is hard for this reason alone.
Basic home maintenance: when to change air filters, smoke alarm batteries, timing of lawn care, how often do you clean the gutters, are you supposed to clean under the stove, what is edging, how do you recycle, how to change locks, etc.
Not to mention the random costs that spring up. Trying to save up money? Good for you. Except your sink just sprung a leak so you need to pay a plumber to fix that. Now you can save money agai... Nope, car needs servicing. Okay, your can definitely save money now.... Wait, that leaky sink sprouted mold so now your bathroom needs to be gutted and redone.
We are all Squidward.
Being absolutely exhausted most of the time. I never thought I'd be the 'I hate everyone' guy. But I am and everyone can f*ck off.
We all become Squidward after hitting a certain age.
Me? I'm Patrick. F*ck your rat race.
As someone who has lost a parent, I can tell you that sometimes you will never be prepared for certain events in your adult life. Everyone’s experience is different, and sometimes adulthood just means figuring it out for yourself.
You got this, grown-ups of the internet. I believe in you
Reality shows are extremely popular because it is an ultimate form of voyeurism.
Whether it's on a competition or a home makeover show, pleasure is derived from watching real-life people respond dramatically to inconsequential situations.
But how much of what we see are authentic reactions?
Curious about the experiences of those who were on camera, Redditor S3xySouthernB asked:
"People who were on reality family shows as kids (think super nanny, wife swap etc) how much of it was real and how much was fiction/set up for drama? Did anything change?"
The following Redditors frowned upon the concept of being portrayed differently on camera.
"I was on Wife Swap when I was 10 years old. My family had to switch with a farming family and we were supposed to be the 'city family' even though my family and I lived in the suburbs. There were plenty of quotes taken out of context as you'd expect. They also incited plenty of drama. I was framed as addicted to video games so they took my xbox and gameboy color for the week. A few days in one of the crew members came in with my gameboy and said 'look I found this' and handed it to me. It shouldn't be surprising that they sent the woman staying in our house into my room to 'catch me in the act'."
"To be honest not much has really changed in my life except getting snapchats of my 10 year old face when my friends catch the reruns. I'm open to any questions if anyone is curious."
It was Season 3 Episode 13 of Wife Swap"
Update for anyone who was curious about how much money the show gave us. The initial amount was $20k but after taxes it came to around $15k like others had expected."
Crazy On Cue
"My parents were 'dinner guests' in an episode of Nanny 911 and they said literally everything was staged. I don't remember all of the details, but they said the directors had a 'code word' that they would say to the kids when they were supposed to start acting all 'crazy'. And then once the scene was done, the kids would be perfectly normal."
"My friends parents were on worlds strictest parents. They came to my house on 4th of July and when they showed our house on tv it was a huge mansion rather than our actual house. The camera crew also told the visiting 'bad kids' to steal alcohol from our house."
A glimpse into the lives of those who are unable to part with their possessions is not always scripted TV.
Hoarding For Real
"I worked with a junk removal company for an episode of hoarders and it was actually 99% REAL. The only thing that they would set up a couple times was if they opened a box and found something interesting off camera they would re-open it on camera and act like they just found it."
"My mother was (probably still is, we aren't in contact) a hoarder and you don't HAVE to make sh*t up. They're seriously, seriously mentally ill but they refuse help because they don't think they're mentally ill, or 'it's not that bad' or they're 'going to get to it next month' or whatever. Total denial and self delusion, which is, yanno, common with severe mental illness."
"Example: for who knows what reason, my mother started putting dirty laundry in the bathtub. Eventually there was just a mountain of it. She wouldn't wash it despite our washer working fine. She wouldn't move it. She wouldn't let ME wash it. I was showering at school for weeks already when I told her 'Mom the laundry in the tub has to go. This is ridiculous. I'll help with it.'"
"She said 'There's no laundry in the tub.'"
"She actually tried to DENY REALITY. I went in there and was like 'These are clothes. In the tub. This is laundry.'"
"She replied 'Oh I think those are clean.'"
"I said, 'So then put them away?' I knew they weren't clean. I just wanted to shower."
"She said 'I'll do it this weekend when I have off.'"
"I hate to spoil the ending but..... she didn't do it."
"She hired a dumpster once and was going to 'throw out everything'. It got there. Normal sized dumpster. She didn't throw out anything because 'they sent too big of a one'. Paid hundreds of dollars to hire this dumpster and didn't use it."
"Oh. Then. She was going to sell the house. Someone actually wanted to buy it to gut and flip. It was really a cool old house, speaking design-wise. She decided at the last possible second not to sell. Had to reimburse the buyer's closing costs plus a bunch of other fees."
"Then cried to anyone who'd listen how the realtor was a scammer who 'tried to sell her house out from under her'. Like they're just rouge realtors going around, listing people's houses without their consent and selling them."
Are the emotional outbursts exhibited on reality shows genuine? Not always.
"A class mate of mine was on my country's Next Top Model. Before getting into the show she was asked what kind of hair she would never want to get, so that the producers know about it and not make her have it during the makeover episode. My classmate had long blonde hair which she really loved, so she said she doesn't want them to cut her hair off and that she also hated strange unnatural colors like blue, pink etc."
"Fast forward to the makeover episode. The hairstyling team comes in and finds her hair unfitting for a model, so she needs to get a makeover and guess what? Her makeover obviously consists of a pixie cut and green hair to make her look like a 'punk fairy.'"
"My class mate cried throughout the entire process, so I guess the producers got the drama they wanted out of this."
"There was a family in our neighborhood who was on a show here in Germany. One day, when accompanied by the camera crew, one of the daughters suddenly threw a screaming fit in public, which was totally unusual for her. When the mom was asked later what the f*k had happened, she said, for a tantrum you get 200 bucks extra."
"A girl I went to school with was on 'My Super Sweet Sixteen'. She was always quiet but well-liked and the kids on that show were usually monsters so we were curious about how the episode would paint her."
"There was one scene where she was checking in on a vendor and they said something might not be finished in time for the party and she didn't have a meltdown or anything but she said something dramatic like, 'Oh no! That's going to ruin my whole birthday party!'"
"After the episode aired her friends who were with her said they did a couple of 'takes' because her first reaction was like, 'Oh, that sucks. Thanks for letting me know.'"
It appeared the majority of Redditors who vouched for a show's realistic portrayal of people on TV was Hoarders.
For Redditor azulweber, the circumstance was relatable.
"yeah my grandmother and her sister are both hoarders and i have no problem believing that it's real. i can't imagine someone who isn't a hoarder being willing to allow a show to do that to their home and belongings just for tv."
Sadly, the exploitation of a person's mental illness seems to make for must-see television.