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A lot of parents can relate to this: Imagine you're out with your kids. You're having a good time. Maybe you all went to the park to take in the sunshine. The children are playing. You're sitting on a bench, keeping an eye on them. All of a sudden, what happens? One of them is gone. Where'd they go? Did they vanish? Are you simply losing your mind? Did you ever even have a kid or kids? A lot can happen when you look away for just a second.

After Redditor blamingpig456 asked the online community, "Parents, what are your 'I looked away for ONE second' stories?" people told us about their experiences.


Reddit Users Share Their Best 'It's A Small World After All' Experience

"I hugged him..."

My son was 3. We were leaving Target. He left my sight as I was adjusting my bags. Maybe two seconds, tops. Poof. He was gone. I try to act cool, but my true-crime podcast obsession got the best of me. The store locks down. We are all looking for him. People are checking cars outside. I'm calling my son's name louder than any intercom system. We were just about to call police.

And then my toddler slides out of the cart area and acts like,"'Sup?" He decided it would be a most excellent idea to shimmy underneath the carts and sit there as the world turns inside out searching for him.

I hugged him and yelled at him for a good 10 minutes, ugly sobbing.

100/100 grateful for my Target folks. We catered lunch for them as a huge thank you and sorry my kid is an a-hole.

italics12

I may or may not...

...have done this to my mother a few times growing up.

Thankfully, she'd trained me to go up to a salesperson and explain the situation if I couldn't find her, so nothing ever escalated to anything like the story above!

"I was downstairs on the computer..."

Our firstborn was about 18 months. Walking but not that agile. I was downstairs on the computer, wife yelled down she was using the bathroom and for me to watch him. We misunderstood each other so he was alone for about 3 minutes. She comes out asking where she is and he is nowhere to be found in the house. Thinking he's just hiding we start a full search only to notice the back patio door is slightly open after a few minutes of hunting. Growing concern at this point but figuring he just snuck out back.

A full search of the fenced/gated yard shows nothing. Now the heartbeat is going. Start running out and down the street. Find him two blocks down. He was heading to the park which would have required crossing 2 roads, one of which was a busy one. Nice neighbors found him and were walking him home as they'd recognized us from previous walks. Years later the little neighbor girl would remind us how he "saved his life". Needless to say, child locks went on all the doors in the house after that.

Rancethetank

"Went to the toilet..."

Went to the toilet, leaving the newborn asleep on a blanket on the floor (on top of a large fluffy carpet). 3 year old was watching tv nearby. Came back to find baby literally rolled up in carpet like a dead body, 3-year-old sitting on top, with a cushion under him too. Still don't know how he did it at all let alone so quickly, and how the baby was totally chilled and unharmed.

peripateticpeople

Believe it or not...

...kids are curious, and curious about things they probably shouldn't have any right to be curious about, haha. Kids will take a newborn and drop them just to see if they bounce.

"Woke up once..."

Woke up once and my two sons had climbed out of a window onto a flat roof. They were 1 and 3. I still don't know how they even got the window open.

1987mark

"I quickly said goodbye..."

I had just moved into a new neighborhood on a cul de sac with my two young daughters (ages 5 & 2). I walked out to the community mailbox to grab my mail and met my next-door neighbor while I was there. We chatted for a couple of minutes when I heard my older daughter yelling from the front door "Hey Dad! Younger Daughter (YD) is naked!". I look over at my house and YD is standing at the end of the driveway as naked as the day she was born. I locked eyes with YD, and with a laugh, she turned around and started bolting the opposite way from me up the street.

I quickly said goodbye to the neighbor, tucked my mail under my arm, and started chasing her down the block. I ended up scooping her up with my other free arm a block later while she was laughing her head off. All of the other neighbors got a good laugh seeing me chasing her down. Couldn't get mad at her as it was so funny, and was impressed she could get undressed so fast.

Lintman1

"He kept a firm grip on her..."

Husband reading a sign about watching your children on the trail at Gooseberry Falls in MN. Looks up to see the middle child heading to the edge of the trail. People fall every year. Some die. I was further down the trail with the youngest.

He kept a firm grip on her for the rest of the walk.

MNConcerto

Naturally.

Kids don't tend to read signs.

"We moved into our new house..."

We moved into our new house on Halloween in 2001. Most of the heavy lifting was done, so the wife decided to begin unpacking the important stuff and I would take our 8-year-old daughter out trick or treating. We stepped outside and I realized I left my phone.

Standing on the front porch I tell her..."Don't move, I have to get my phone. I'll be right back. Do not move."

Narrator: She moved.

New neighborhood. Kids and parents everywhere. I'm running up and down the street frantically and after about 15 minutes I spot a family, mom and dad and a handful of rugrats...with mine in tow.

They had a good laugh telling me they just turned around and there she was, having appeared out of nowhere. Decided to stay close assuming some hysterical parent would eventually come running.

catching_comets

"My daughter..."

My daughter was 18 months old. Standing in between my husband and me in the kitchen, arm distance from both of us. She slipped, fell, and broke two front teeth.

Why_So_Slow​

"When my daughter was little..."

When my daughter was little, probably about 3, she went with me to shop for some tools. I turned away to look at something and heard behind me "Daddy, what's this?" "Uh, honey, that's an axe. Please give it to me." She did, and all was well, but I'm glad my wife wasn't there--she would have panicked.

retailguy_again

"Anyway..."

So we took the kids (7, 3, 3, and 3) to a water park. One of us would stay in the kiddie area with 2 of the triplets and the other parent would take one of the 3-year-olds and the 7-year-old on a ride. It was working pretty well.

Note, the kiddie area was mostly contained, but there was no gate or anything. At one of the swaps, we blinked for a second, and our adventurous 3-year-old was gone. Instant panic. Get security there, staff is looking, I'm running around looking.

Anyway, we eventually found him. He had ridden a waterslide with my wife earlier and decided "That was fun, I'm gonna do it again" The 3-year-old had gone back to get in line for the waterslide by himself, and they found him about 2 from the front of the line.

RoboNinjaPirate

Maybe it's just me,

...but I don't think I'm going to have any children. Too much hassle. And I think I'd worry too much about them doing something wild like... well, anything listed above. I'll just stick to making sure I take care of myself. That's a full time job in and of itself!

But parents: Hey, don't be too hard on yourselves. These things happen. Kids aren't easy. You're doing great.

Have some stories of your own to share? Feel free to tell us all about them in the comments section below!

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Typically, I would write an intro about my own experiences with the weird kids at school, but I WAS the weird kid in school. Not in a bad way, more like a “I had a John Waters phase” when I was 16 and everyone knew it. So like, cool-weird. At least I hope so.

Schools aren’t always so lucky to have the cool kinds of weird kids though. The spectrum of weird extends even further than that, and can sometimes end up very disasterous.

U/Imaginary_East5786 asked: What was the weirdest thing the weird kid did at school?

​Let’s start with the grossest of the gross. Because why not.

Was it worth it?

peeing ralph wiggum GIF Giphy

He heard that you'd automatically get suspended if you peed your pants at school. He wanted to find out if it was true, peed his pants, got suspended.

Memoryduel

Scientific method:

> Observation: 'I've heard that by peeing your pants you will be suspended'

> Hypothesis: If I pee my pants I will be suspended

> Experiment: I peed my pants and I got suspended

> Conclusion: If I pee my pants I get suspended

Glez_fdezdavila_

Uhhh what was the intention here?

He got mad that he didn't understand how to play a game at lunchtime so he started hitting and punching the nearest person to him, who happened to be me. When I shoved him away and asked him what the hell was he doing, he whipped his unit.out, charged at me and when I shoved him away from me again he started crying and ran away with his member still sticking out.

Kurtles12

​Next ones up are the lowkey (or even highkey) disturbing stories. These weird kids can get a little scary.

Boom theret.

At my middle school, someone decided to get a little attention with a good old fashioned bomb threat. Except they thought that a bomb threat meant literally writing "bomb threat" somewhere. Worse yet, they misspelled the f*ck out of it, and wrote "boom theret."

So we had to go on a brief, very awkward lockdown while the police checked the perimeter for booms.

Angusthedangus

I hope there was no overlap in the columns.

Serial Killer Halloween GIF by GIPHY CAM Giphy

She wrote a list of all the girls and boys she wanted to kiss and murder and then casually passed it out on the playground.

Fun-Acadia-8735

2 separate lists or just the 1?

OppositeYouth

Same list 2 columns lol.

Fun-Acadia-8735

Holy crap.

Had the weird kid in high school ask the teacher to use the bathroom. She said no and this dude legit stabbed his hand with a pencil. Went all the way through then asked if he could now...sh*t was wild.

This was Pearl High School in Mississippi. This was the school Luke Woodham shot and killed his girlfriend and her friend at the school. This kid stabbed himself with the pencil about 2 months after that happened. This was late 1997.

Roberted1982

​Most of the time, however, the weird kids are pretty d*mn funny.

Ok, but this takes a lot of skill.

Had a kid nicknamed "cheeseburger" in the grade ahead of me in high school. He got his nickname because when it was time for his class to go to lunch, he snuck into the roof and crawled his way into the cafeteria, dropped down and proceeded to steal all the cheeseburger put out for lunch. Unfortunately they caught him in the act and sent him to the principal's office.

A year later he was caught stealing a teacher's computer, and in the process of being arrested he bit the officers hand, getting him sent to juvi never to be heard of again.

Theonering1

Every school had the cat girl.

cat dragging GIF Giphy

The weird kid at my highschool tied a string around his pencil case and pulled out around the halls pretending it was a dog. He still lives in my hometown. I think unemployed.

Oh also weird girl in middle school acted like a cat. She would meow and hiss at people, lick the water fountain and rub her body on the teacher's legs. In 8th grade. I have no idea where she ended up.

SendmePMsofyourBMs

Mood.

Weird kid in elementary was a self proclaimed alien. Once, while waiting for the bus, she told me "On my planet we eat people like you" and proceeded to bite me. We later became friends in high school and she used to give me massages during lunch break in the quad. Just realized now she was likely tenderizing me.

Iheartrevolution

I was exactly this kind of weird.

He didn't say much, but if asked, he would go to the front of the class and perform Tip-Toe Through the Tulips with all of the emotion and volume of Tiny Tim, holding nothing back.

The last I heard, he became an energy trader, made a ton of money and married well.

10per

I can definitely relate to that last one. In middle school, my English teacher would let me go to the front of the class and perform monologues or songs from Broadway musicals. Weird, but that’s what happens when schools cut funding for the arts and the theatre kids have no outlet.

As long as you’re not hurting anyone, I say let your freak flag fly, man

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