Parents Explain Which Things Surprised Them Most When Their Child Moved Out
Parenting is a lifelong commitment.
My mother still marvels at how fast I grew up, and I know she was very much taken aback by the (first) time I moved out. I was 20 then and honestly, she would have been fine if I'd stayed indefinitely. Did she ever think, watching me take my first steps, that the years would fly by and that one day she'd be helping me move across the country? I'm sure she did. But that doesn't mean she was entirely prepared.
After Redditor amberarmy1912 asked the online community, "Parents, what surprised you the most when your child moved out?" people shared their stories.
"Or just grabbing something..."
That's hard.
One thing is how much I do miss my kids. I enjoy them not being here (even more once the last one moves out and my MIL is gone) but I miss the f*** out of them. I was so tired of living in one room (the master bedroom was also my office and I work from home) and I enjoy the extra room, but I hate not stopping by and joking around when I see something weird or funny online. Or just grabbing something I know they like when I am at the store and just kind of dropping it by their room as I go past. All those little things are gone now. I hope they realize how much those little things really meant.
The other is some of my own personal issues. I want to hear from my kids but I don't want to bother them so I don't contact them as often as I would like. I have never been much of a just shoot-the-s*** person so that hurts me in communications. I see a lot of my dad in me that way, he rarely ever calls me except when there is a death in the family or something. I used to not call him when he worked because I could never remember when it was safe to call.
"The difference..."
The difference between peaceful quiet and sad, lonely quiet.
My mother told me this...
...after I left. It must have been quite the adjustment.
"The moment our son moved out..."
The moment our son moved out to live on his own he became vegetarian. He never gave us any indication he was planning to or wanted to be vegetarian.
"I was cooking recipes..."
We have one kid. I was cooking recipes for 6 every night thinking that the portion counts were misleading because we never had any leftovers. Nope. Our grocery bills are now about a third of what they used to be.
That's always nice!
Tell me: Who doesn't love saving money?
"I also realized..."
That we talk more now that he lives on his own. We seriously play games at least twice a week for four to six hours. I also realized I was the safe mom that all his friends felt comfortable with. They still call to talk or stop by for a socially distanced catch-up.
I also realized that my water bill was only a 1/4 of what it used to be. I wasn't imagining the super long showers.
"I found out..."
Mom here. I was worried that I would be sad and heartbroken. I found out that was not the case. I was excited to see where her path took her. It's amazing to see her making her own world and dreams come true. I now have more money, so I travel a lot more.
"I'm sorry, mom." (From a child.)
How many kitchen utensils you actually need to make basic meals.
I'm sorry mom. I will never make fun of your crowded cupboards again.
This is so true!
My kitchen cabinets are so cluttered. In a way, I am thankful. I know I am always prepared in the event I want to make something new. It's a great feeling.
"God knows I love them..."
It's an instant pay rise. God knows I love them, but even when they have been working and contributing to the household, me and my wife have still fronted most of the bills and purchases. Going from providing for a family of five to just me and the wife.... let's just say we eat better cuts of meat and our savings accounts have never been healthier.
"The possibility to spend much more time..."
The possibility to spend much more time with my wife, which wasn't a surprise, but to sort of rediscover her as the amazing individual I once fell in love with. I never lost sight of it, but the roles of mother and father took up soo much of our time, so our "we"-time had always been on the back-burner (I know I haven't worded this very clearly, but I hope you get what I mean).
"They have their own, thoughtful opinions..."
When they move out, they also take a step towards adulthood, which means our relationship also changes for the better. We can take a step away from "parent-child"-relationship to "two people who love and respect each other" and we can talk about many issues much more as equals now. They have their own, thoughtful opinions on many topics, an I love having these discussions because more often than not they'll surprise me with a different perspective, and make me re-think my own opinions.
"I'm a dad..."
The dad identity I adopted isn't who I am.
I'm a dad, but I used to be more than that and still want to be.
Counting Pennies...
How much my food bill went down. Also the quiet.
And electricity. And heating. And water. And how little you move your car anymore.
Moooooo
My oldest son drinks milk like crazy. I'd buy 4 to 6 gallons a week for our family of 5. He moved out so I figured I'd need half that.
Poured a gallon down the sink because it went bad. Okay just get one gallon. We sometimes didn't use that so I buy half gallons now. This means I was spending over $500 a year just on milk for my oldest. It took me almost 6 months to figure out portions of protein, I was making three side dishes, I cut that to two.
Cinderella...
How clean the house can be.
I have lived on my own now for a few years and i used to be bugged about messes but nowadays I realize there is no way to stay clean all the time and having a clean day once a week or every other week is good for the mind and soul. So I'll make small messes and then save a day to do a deep clean.
The Replacements
My mom bought two guinea pigs because "the house felt empty."
My parents have had 5 kids move out so far and are now the proud owners of 3 cats and 2 dogs. I'm fully convinced she is replacing us with animals. Not sure if I should be offended that she got a pomeranian when I moved out. That thing is annoying as hell.
The Last
I'm the last child to move out. I guess what surprised me was how much my dad cared for his children. Mother told me how he'd cried for days because i could have stayed longer but decided to start my life. Never really dawned on me how much he loves us.
Now thats love!
Man, my room was turned into a workout room within a month, my mom still collected child support from my dad for me but didn't support me at all in college, then mom tried to claim me on her taxes as she "continues to provide a home for me". While I had a full time job in school to pay rent and bills. I filed my taxes first which caused her taxes to get flagged, she tried to get me to re-file as her dependent. Now thats love!
the 4 of us...
We are 4 children, the youngest is nearly 28 and we all moved out years ago. I am currently 30 and moved out when I was 18. We all thought it would get to my mum, but actually it was my dad who said he couldn't stand the empty and quiet house. All 4 of us liked to bring friends and the house was always full. I totally get that it must feel strange sometimes, but initially I thought he would love the peace.
He gets all emotional when we visit and keeps our rooms like they were so we always have somewhere to stay if we want to. We are all having kids now and my parents even bought beds etc for them, so we could (and would) stay over night. Tbh I really enjoy it too, when we all come together to this day.
It's Over
To answer on my parents behalf: how much the two of them had grown apart.
That hits, well, home. My parents definitely had a scare, divorce on the table. Instead of fighting they finally freaking talked properly after many years.
Turns out, they love each other and are having a blast now. Communicate, people.
Menu changes
My mom said the most surprising thing to her is all the meals she used to cook for us that I hated, I now request those same meals frequently. Lol.
I'm Missed
On the flip side; my mum told me the first night I moved out, she found my dad sitting downstairs reading my favourite childhood book to himself. I hilariously refused to let anyone read me that book. That was mine and dad's book up until I was about 6 (then I just read by myself)
After all the emotional/verbal abuse he dealt throughout my life I was surprised he cared enough to miss me.
back & forth
Just how much I still miss living with him, even though he's been settled out of home for a few years now after yo-yoing a bit.
XOXOXOXO
Honestly I feel like my dad for sure misses me more than my mom. he wasn't really one to say i love you or I'm proud of you but now he's always hugging me and telling me he loves me all types of stuff.
My mom never hugged us when we were kids. Now she does it all the time. She's a much happier person now that she doesn't have to deal with the three of us.
Found It
The porn that boy stashed under his mattress. I burned it. not to my taste whatsoever.
Who stashes porn under their mattress? Who, after doing so, doesn't take it away when moving out?
It Was You!
Answering for my parents:
That it wasn't their kids who kept making the house messy and hoarding.
The Vibe
We have 4 kids. When the 1st left, I was surprised at how much the whole dynamic of the house changed. Don't know how to explain it. Just a different vibe.
Also, we did a pretty good job of having dinner together as a family nearly every night. So, of course, everyone had their place at the table and that never changed. For a few months after the first one moved out, sometimes I'd look to the other end of the table and my wife would be spontaneously crying as she looked at the empty spot next to her. (Don't worry, we're doing better now)
Lastly, this can be quite emotional for some parents because in some ways they are almost having a funeral for the child. Once that kid moves out, there can be a literal mourning of the "death" of a child because that child is never coming back. When they visit again they are an adult. And by saying this I certainly don't want to trivialize the trauma folks experience at the actual death of a child. This isn't nearly as hard. Not even in the same universe of difficulty.
Zzzzzzz
How they can sleep so many hours but yet keep you from sleeping.
It Gets Better
My son left and moved out at 19 last year and I've been verklempt about his absence on our daily lives. Did you feel a difference between the first vs the others? We still have 3 more kids at home and I've stated hugging them twice as much 🥺.
Another Generation
How much harder it is to raise grandkids. We just weren't expecting that one.
I was raised by my grandparents. They weren't expecting to raise more kids. They wanted to retire and travel. Instead they both had to keep working and raising babies (I have a twin). In your 50's is not easy physically, either.
Funny Ha Ha
Answering on their behalf "just a joke" they now have to take out the trash and do grocery shopping themselves, plus they have to get off their seats to get a cup of water.
The Loan
How much we miss our daily interactions, even when they were just 15 minutes long.
Before our oldest children moved out (two to go!), they were hardly home. Between college, "study groups", working and social activities, on most days we'd see them just before bed and just after they woke up.
Now that they're out on their own, we really miss even those "daily check-ins".
We still call and text a lot. But obviously it isn't the same.
I get that your children aren't given to you, they're loaned to you. But damn if it doesn't feel like a part of you has been amputated.
Purfect Replacement
I was the youngest of 3 and moved out with my sister. My mom kept going on about how excited she was to be free. 2 months in she adopted a cat that look exactly like mine. I still call her once a week to make sure she isn't to lonely.
The Pick Up
How quickly they pick things up. I don't mean that literally. I think I thought my daughter would be a potato for much longer than she was.
Showertime
We have son and 2 daughters, when daughters were both in college water bill was reduced by 2/3.
In the Poorhouse
I never realized how much my parents relied on my rent. Every month I have to come up with a different excuse so they'll still take it.
This doesn't seem... right. There is a lot of expenses that come with starting a life as a young adult. Unless your parents are disabled or elderly they are doing you a disservice by not allowing you to save for your own future. You will have time to take care of them later.
Riley
As the one who moved out: How pets can take to the change of household members.
My parents have a cat, Riley, who was with them the time I was living with them (note: This was my second time living at home, bad times in my life) - he always had a connection with me, and would enjoy curling up next to me and purring for me, plus, I am the only one he allows to carry him baby style.
And after I moved out, he spent several days wandering around the house, as if he was trying to find where I had disappeared to.
And the first time I visited after that, he meowed at me a lot, like he was shouting at me for leaving. Even now, when I visit, he'll cuddle up to me the moment I am sat down.
Pride
How proud I am that they are independent and happy, and shocked I lived to see the day!
Hang Up
That he never called his mother for 3 weeks. She was crushed. She loves her babies even at age 22. We still have 3 at home thank goodness.
Amusingly, my father specifically told me not to call my mother the first three weeks I was away at school.
It was a good move. She got over the worrying phase, I felt some independence and then had a nice talk with my mum.
Crushed...
The crushing pain. Never for a minute did I expect it. Watched him drive away with his friend, car all packed up to move into an apartment together, and burst into tears. Went up to his room to vacuum and sob. Grieved for two weeks. He moved across town.
Then as the years went by, he came back, moved back out, came back again, moved back out again. The last time he moved, he went 2,000 miles away, a 3-hour plane ride. I'll never get over it.
We're damned happy for him to be living a full life on his own terms, but had no idea it wouldn't include us in any way. I just never saw that future in my little crystal ball. We were always supportive: "Do your own thing, whatever it is, we'll support your choices," and still feel that way. But I had no idea what the physical pain of him being out of our daily lives would be. What can I say, he's a sparkler, and our lives are simply dull without him.
Give a Ring
I grew up with strict parents. Religious, politically conservative, all that.
My folks were strict enough, that when I was in college and over the age of 18, they would still interfere and make decisions for me.
When I finally got out on my own, I stopped telling them about a lot of my life. I started doing a lot of things that I had always wanted to do. And I also found that I didn't need or want to talk with them that often, because they were my primary social group even up to my early 20s.
Last year, I made the decision to start calling my mom once a week. Before that, even though I didn't talk to her frequently, I made sure to tell her I loved her before I hung up.
This year I am calling my mom twice a week. Our relationship has gotten a lot better, and I kind of wish I had started doing this 10 years ago.
What a Mess...
My best friend found half of their dishes hidden in their son's closet. They were dirty and disgusting. They knew dishes were going missing and had asked him dozens of times if he had them but he always denied it. He wasn't mean or rotten just lazy and goofy.
A New Son
That her boyfriend continued to live here. When my daughter went back to college her boyfriend had already been staying here for a few months. His dad had died & his mom had to move into a much smaller place so he moved in with us. When my daughter went back to her dorm he stayed & continued to commute to his college. It was temporary & he's a good guy so it wasn't too bad, just unexpected.
Sorry Ma...
I moved out at 17 because my GF got an apartment. Mom was heartbroken and I feel bad about it today.
Same old...
My parents have reported most of the same; sad, quiet, lonely, cheaper food bill, etc. But once my brother moved back in for a while in his early 20s and my mom said she missed being able to go downstairs and get coffee in the morning without putting clothes on.
I'm the Kid!!
When I moved out (I moved countries too so I was gone, gone) I got a pitiful phone call from my parents. They begged me to return. My dad said he needed someone to talk to (basically he wanted his free therapist back) and needed someone to give him back massages (He historically had back problems and my mom is crap at massaging sore muscles without leaving bruises). My mom begged me to come back and take over parenting, cooking and cleaning again saying that she was too old. It made me feel very used.
I hadn't realized how much I had been doing for them. It was especially manipulative when my mom put my baby sister on and she cried and asked why I didn't love her anymore and told me about how my mom wasn't taking care of her and just ignored her needs (she was 4).
Secret Life
All the stuff he had. I don't know where he got thousands of dollars worth of cameras, tablets, laptops, and other expensive things.
He never had a traditional employer. When we saw all the stuff, we thought he got into drugs or stealing or something.
A New Beginning...
How similar it feels to starting your life over after a breakup or graduating from college. And then the immense sadness you feel when they ask to move back in because the $150K liberal arts degree you bought them won't let them actually make a living.
Thanks Covid
My parents begged me to move home because they wanted to have a full house again. When COVID hit, they got their wish. They seem to forget their kids aren't children anymore and that we don't have to ask permission to come and go or to spend time somewhere that isn't home.
That last one hits me something fierce...
...and I'm not even a parent!
It must be incredibly difficult to accept these kinds of changes after so many years of sacrifice.
If you'll excuse me, I'll go hug my mom. (Thankfully we've been able to see each other during this pandemic!)
Have your own stories to share? Feel free to share them in the comments below.
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CW: Suicide
There is so much to learn in life.
And once you acquire certain things mentally, you regret it.
How much 411 have you come across over time that made you think... "How can I unlearn that?"
Yeah, not possible.
Knowledge is power and sometimes it's a nightmare.
Don't we have enough to keep us up at night?
Damn curiosity.
Well let's do some learning.
Redditor RedBoyFromNewy wanted to shed some light on creepy issues we need to be discussing. They asked:
"What’s a disturbing fact that not a lot of people know of?"
So who is ready to spill, and where do you find the info?
From the Guts
"Without mucus your stomach would digest itself."
Ddubsquizzee
"The reason you body produces more saliva before vomiting is your bodies way if protecting your mouth from the acidity of the vomit before you actually throw up."
-AntiVegan-
Death
"There are more suicides than homicides in the US every year."
tmsanch
"60% of all gun deaths in fact are suicides. It is estimated that someone offs themselves with a firearm every 20 minutes in the US. And 80% of them are males."
hymnsees
"And what's worse (knowing, as my family just went through this.)... 70% of suicides have no note. It's a common misconception that most people leave a note and it just isn't true. Mainly because a lot of people who write notes realize they don't want to go through with it. Those who are 'successful' just do it."
jdward01
After...
"You can give still 'birth' if you die while pregnant. The decomp process will force the baby out. It’s rare but it does happen."
MelissaAthalie
"This is usually what ends up happening when a pregnant woman gets murdered. They usually find the fetus either completely separate (like in the Lacy and Connor Peterson case) or in the same location as the mother, but clearly birthed (like with the case with Shanann Watts). It's something I never knew happened until very recently and I think it's one of the most horrifying aspects of death."
rivlet
Disaster
"The deadliest ship disaster was the MV Wilhelm Gustloff, a ship built during the Nazi Regime. In January 1945, she was evacuating 10,000 German citizens ahead of the soviet Invasion when (albeit ironically) a Soviet Submarine spotted them, and fired three torpedoes. The ship was on the freezing cold Baltic Sea, and the davits (ropes) for the lifeboats had frozen over."
"Not only that, but the ship was only meant to carry 2,000 people normally. These two factors, coupled with the harsh angle the ship was sinking at, meant only half of the lifeboats could be deployed. 9,400 people drowned to death that night, and nobody knows about it."
TheNonbinaryWren
I See You
"Your eyes have a separate immune system than the rest of your body, and if your normal immune system ever learns about your eyes, it will target them and you'll go blind."
hiruko_uchiha
Oh my eye. How do we protect them? As if I don't have enough stress.
Launched
"Penguins can launch their poop out of their butts like 5-6m far."
Bela_hrn
Despair
"Cotard's delusion, also known as walking corpse syndrome, is a neuropsychiatric disorder in which the person is in eternal damnation. They literally believe they are dead or dying [or don't have organs], the amount of despair is unimaginable and simply can't be grasped by people not suffering from it."
SweetTimpaniofLogic
'hard problem'
"It may seem like we know a lot about the human brain, but our standard way of studying brain activity is an fMRI, where a single pixel contains over 3 million neurons. That is more than many vertebrate animals' entire brains. The truth is, we really have no idea how the brain gives rise to consciousness."
"Edit: Even if we somehow perfectly worked out all the neural correlates of consciousness so we could say a mental state happens if and only if some exact pattern of brain activity happens, we would still have the 'hard problem' of consciousness: Why do these physical processes give rise to raw subjective experience, rather than just happening 'in the dark?'"
zeugenie
2 Minutes...
"If your esophagus closes and you cannot swallow, you have about 2 minutes before saliva starts reaching your windpipe. It is not a long time, but it is long enough to panic..."
grat_is_not_nice
"I have Eosiniphillic Oesophagitis and have had food stuck in the oesophagus for up to 24 hours before. And it’s horrible. You don’t realise how much saliva you swallow, to be constantly choking and vomiting that back up isn’t the best experience!"
AwayFollowing554
Get Lucky
"You’ve probably been closer to dying multiple times in your life then you even know. Just got lucky, or unlucky depending on who you are."
GingeBeardManBro
Well that's enough to disrupt sleep for life. Thanks y'all.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
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Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
The best stories are ones with exciting plot twists.
But the next best type of stories are the ones that continue spiraling out of control.
Curious to hear examples of this, Redditor _Mitnix_ asked:
"What's your best 'oh you thought this was bad, it gets worse' story?"
It's story time. You may want to buckle up.
It All Started With A Cat
"This is a long one, but I promise it's worth it:"
"A buddy of mine was cat-sitting for a friend of his while the guy was out of town on a vacation. My buddy didn't have a car, so the dude told him that if he needed to go out and pick up more cat food or anything, he could borrow the car."
"At the time, my buddy was living right down the street from this guy, staying at his parents' house. So my buddy was just going over for a few hours each day to feed the cat and keep it company, then going back home."
"Meanwhile, he's also been flirting with this woman online. She lives several states away, but he feels like they seem to be getting pretty serious. So he decides to take some liberties, really push the envelope on where he'll pick up cat food from, and he takes his friend's car on a little multi-state road trip."
"This is insane, right? Just atrociously bad judgement, especially since someone does need to feed the cat. To solve this, he left his parents a note. It read, 'I am camping in the woods behind our house. Please go over to ____'s and feed his cat. I'll let you know when I'm home.'"
"Boom. Problem solved, right?"
"Except that the 'woods behind our house' are about 20 yards deep. It takes less than five minutes to walk through them and come out into the neighboring housing development. So his parents went looking for him, calling out for him, and couldn't find him. They got worried and contacted a family friend, a local police officer. He subsequently got a hold of the fire department. There was a full-on search party combing through about 1/50th of an acre of woods. Unsurprisingly, they were coming up with nothing."
"This was before cell phones were common, so my buddy was completely unaware that his plan had fallen apart. He was cruising along on his 12-hour drive, expecting to get to this girl's house just in time for dinner. Except he didn't have a GPS. So he got lost. Very lost. Like, by the time he turned up at this woman's house, it was almost midnight."
"When he got there, she was crying her eyes out. He assured her that it was okay, he was fine, wasn't hurt or in a wreck or anything, he'd just gotten lost. And she said, 'No, no, I wasn't worried about you. My dad just died in a motorcycle accident.'"
"So he bailed on his cat-sitting duties, stole a car, and inspired his parents to file a missing-persons just so he could awkwardly watch a woman cry for a few hours and then drive back home."
– GavinBelsonsAlexa
The Beekeeper's Nightmare
"I will try to keep it short. I am a beekeeper. My 3rd year of beekeeping, I suddenly developed a severe allergy to bee stings. It was spring and I was installing bees for the beginning of the season. I was up to the last hive, went to install that package of bees and one stung me right in the top of my head."
"I finished up a few minutes after and went up toward the house to do some other things. I started feeling flush and I could feel my heart racing. After I few minutes I realized I was having an anaphylactic reaction."
"If you’ve never had one, aside from the physical symptoms, they also say you will get a feeling of impending doom. That was spot on. I absolutely felt I was going to die and people do die from these reactions."
"So I am now in the house and desperately searching for Benadryl of which I have none. I am also having trouble breathing, my body is going haywire and I feel like I’m going to black out shortly."
"I call my mom, who lives an hour away, to call 911 because I feel like I will be unconscious soon. She says okay, phone rings 30 seconds later. It’s my mom, she goes 'I called 911 but they said you have to call'. This was my first wtf."
"So I call and it’s a very typical 911 call she is trying to keep me talking and I essentially started vomiting and she is still on the line and I am waiting and waiting for this alleged ambulance."
"A full half hour goes by. At this point I am actually coming out of the reaction. So I go to sit at my kitchen counter. I’m still on the line with the 911 dispatcher. I see the ambulance pull up and I say, oh they’re here. She’s like great, are you okay? I’m like yes and then she says goodbye and hangs up."
"I see the EMTs outside but my driveway has a gate so they are just standing there and they ring the bell on my gate and I am just looking at them, dumbfounded. Like I called for an emergency over a half hour ago, and they’re gonna roll up here and ring my bell and wait for me to come out when I more than likely could be unconscious or dead on the floor."
"I literally had to go out and let them in. Then they basically talked me in to going to the hospital to get checked out. Another huge mistake because this took place in the 2 months in my entire life when I didn’t have health insurance. So I ended up paying $4000 for a late ambulance and some IV Benadryl and epinephrine."
"Oh which also reminds me, a paramedic also showed, put the IV in when I agreed to go to the hospital. Then I felt something dripping and turns out he put it in my artery rather than a vein and it was just pushing the fluid out of the IV."
"0/10 would not go through any of that again…but I did 10 years later when I had another anaphylactic reaction due to a bee sting. However this went a lot smoother and I had epi-pens and a responsive ambulance."
– soline
Oil Everywhere
"Arrive home from work, my house reeks of oil."
"Go in the basement, and there's a pool of oil, with my stuff floating in it. The oil filter on my burner rotted out (it was defective and recalled, but the tech never bothered to notify me or replace it). Call up the tech, he throws a new one, charges me the emergency call fee, and advises I call HO insurance before running away (it was his fault, I didn't know it yet)."
"This was February in NY, about 13F out, and obviously the burner wasn't on while sitting in a pool of oil. But, they get there pretty quickly soak it up, and get things running so my pipes don't freeze."
"Only way to get the smell out is to dry clean everything I own, then shampoo all the carpets, run deodorizers, etc. Takes weeks. Had a headache the whole time."
"Turns out, my basement has cracks, most of it leaked through. They had to cut out my foundation and dig out the contaminated soil."
"Oil in soil means DEC gets involved. Whole new can of worms as they now had to monitor the process, test at every step. Big enough deal I have a spill number in their database."
"A 20 yard dumpster, with 20 yards of oil soaked sand, is so heavy that it broke through my driveway, destroying it. They did that twice, took out my entire driveway."
"Remember how I said this was in February? March brought the COVID shutdown."
"I spent over a year with my basement in shambles, holes in my driveway, plastic sheets taped up, no washer/dryer, and all sorts of equipment kicking around."
"The next spring, they're back and working, and screwed everything up. Not going to get into every detail, but after a big fight, I managed to get rid of them and bring in a new company to fix their screwups and finish the job. Old crew got very difficult when the new crew requested permits and reports. Turns out, they never bothered. Had to do all that before they could start working again."
"New company dropped a storage crate on my yard to store my stuff while working, destroyed my grass, took out a sprinkler, took out my neighbor's driveway curb, got concrete all over my brickwork, but at least the nightmare was finally over."
– MyNameIsRay
These Redditors have been dealt with some major blows.
People who say that things will always get better, are partially right. Things do come around, eventually.
But you never know how many curve balls life has to throw at you until there's a resolution.
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Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
Life is full of disappointments. We lose out on a job opportunity or the one designer article of clothing we really wanted is not available in our size.
But we go on.
But the biggest letdowns are the ones we never see coming but must contend with.
Redditor Frequent-Pilot5243 asked:
"What is a depressing truth you have made peace with?"

No matter how much you prize a friendship, not all of them are for forever.
Here Today, Gone Tomorrow
"A friendship you thought would last forever can end in an instant."
– Febreze4200
The Best Mate Who Quit
"My best mate of 20 years, said that he didn’t want to be my best man and just said he didn’t want to be my friend any more. Hurt like hell."
– Gavindasing
It's Okay To Let Go
"Sometimes people you care deeply about will choose to drop out of your life and all you can really do is have the grace to let them."
"edit. to everyone struggling with being left behind, and to everyone struggling with having to be the one to leave- I hope the pain eases for you soon."
– girlloss
Restarting The Process
"I have a really hard time with this one. Every friendship I've had in my adult life has only lasted a couple years tops. Rarely a falling out or anything, but just drifting apart or sh*t happens type deal. It's hard for me to make friends in the first place because I'm pretty shy, so having to regularly restart that process is really discouraging. Right now I don't really have any friends because I've just kinda given up trying."
– plebeian1523
The harsh reality of losing the people we love hits home for these Redditors.
Grandpa Time
"My grandpa just wanted to get to know me and the man I was becoming during his last year of life. Which I was too young and too selfish to realize."
– MrMunky24
Lost Opportunity
"Yeah, this hits home. I spent 90% of my childhood with my grandparents. I was at their house almost everyday. When I got into my teens and obviously found friends, discovered women, all that stuff and then I just stopped seeing them. They’re both gone now and they died with the memories of me as a child. Although they seen me sometimes while I was older, they didn’t know me because I didn’t give them the chance."
– Loud-Distance-1456
In Grief
"My dad passed away 6 weeks ago and I will NEVER see, hear, chat or get to hug him ever again & that forever is a long time."
– somethinggood19
These sobering facts were huge disappointments.
Truth About CPR
"This is coming from a firefighter:"
"If you have to perform CPR on them, it's most likely over for the patient."
"I'm not sure if I've made peace with it completely, but I've accepted it at least."
– Rukhnul
The After Effects
"I've taken CPR training twice in the past 10 years. The instructors were so completely different... The second one flat out told us 'you're giving them about a 15% chance of living, and even if they live, they will probably have some kind of severe trauma that will dramatically decrease their quality of life.' Wow..."
– DavidAg02
Despite Having Good Intentions...
"No one is coming to help."
– _meddlin_
That Train Has Left The Station
"I'm aging nonstop."
– insaight
Innocence Is Gone
"My childhood is gone, and I have no good memory from that phase of my life."
– anonymoose_mrx
No matter what, life goes on with or without us.
The best that any of us can do while we're passengers on this giant spaceship is to take life as it comes and pick up the pieces the best we can when things don't pan out as we'd hoped.
Sometimes, it's about celebrating the small victories–like finally finding a store that has your shoe size.
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People Describe The Times Someone Mocked Them For Being Wrong But They Were Actually Right
The truth matters.
Something one would think was a given in modern society.
Yet all over the world, there are people so unbelievably stubborn, that they simply refuse to believe the facts.
Sometimes even when presented with evidence.
This could be for something menial, such as refusing to believe that a cotton candy was actually invented by a dentist.
But sometimes, refusing to believe the truth could have serious consequences, up to and including climate change, the effectiveness of masks, and the disproportionate amount of gun violence in the US.
Redditor Lady_Of_The_Water was curious about the many things, both frivolous and serious, people refused to believe were true, leading them to ask:
"Whats something someone thought you were wrong about and ridiculed you for it, but it turns out you were right?"
What's that smell?
"That there really was a gas leak in the apartment building."
"Thankfully, the fire didn't cause much damage."- yamsnavas2.
There's a reason the bill is so high.
"Our water usage at work went up a lot."
"They checked all the toilets, sinks for leaks, couldn't find anything."
"I mentioned that it seemed to coincide with the new water cooler system installation, maybe that should be checked."
"They basically laughed at me."
"That stupid water system never worked good and the guy came in 3 different times and said it was just the filter."
"Every month it needs changed???"
"Didn't seem right."
"Finally a different technician came in and result was it was never installed correctly."
"I asked, 'could that have anything to do with the increased water usage that started when this got installed?'"
" He smiled 'I wondered if anyone caught that, yes the valve was not correct and water has been running'."
"For 5 months!!"
"If only they had listened."
"Total redemption!"- McTee967.
Have you ever looked at a map?
"I had a coworker doubling down repeatedly, claiming that new Zealand is north of Australia."
"I even told her about how I had lived there and she just assumed I was such a huge idiot that I didn't know where on the globe I was living."
"Brought the smartphone out and put an end to that."
"Let me just say, it's ok to not know where all the countries are."
"The problem is if you heavily assert you are right and others are stupid."- PlopPlopPlopsy.
Is it supposed to hurt this much?
"My husband told me that I was a 'baby' about my IUD insertion and insisted that it wasn't painful."
"That my concerns about entrusting a stranger to shove a foreign object into my body were paranoid."
"I listened to him because really, the info you'd find online is overwhelmingly positive."
"Long story short: the provider placed it wrong, didn't check/fix it when I asked her to."
"I spent 4 years in pain that I eventually 'got used to."
"It expelled half way out my cervix, had to get it yanked out at the ER."
"That's when I was told that copper IUDs are notorious for breaking inside the uterus."
"Because it broke inside me."
"The cherry on top?"
"The female gyno with three kids I saw to get the broken piece removed told me that 'cervixes don't really feel pain' and that I didn't really need to remove it."
"Goes without saying, I was in severe pain for 2 weeks straight before this appointment."
"Tons of women came out with their stories about lawsuits over IUDs, how they got pregnant with an IUD."
" Stories similar to mine."
"And how women should really be offered anesthesia or pain pills for this procedure."
"And when my husband was surprised to learn about the pain I endured I reminded him 'You called me a baby and everyone else told me it was all in my head'."
"Which is why I didn't talk about it."- PopK0rnAndMMs.
Seems like you could learn something from me.
"In sixth grade chemistry a teacher asked us what element was a gas that was lighter than air, and extremely flammable/explosive."
"I grew up on science because of what my dad does for a living and Bill Nye."
"I knew about the Hindenburg, and so I was really proud of myself when I raised my hand and said 'Hydrogen'."
"The teacher laughed at me and said that no, it was Helium, and the entire rest of the class proceeded to laugh too."
"Almost three decades later I work in a lab now, and f*ck that teacher I was right."- vanyel_ashke.
The dictionary is your friend.
"I have worked as a translator and a proofreader."
"For one of my translations, it went something like 'and he piqued her interest'."
"My proofreader docked me for an inaccuracy and switched it to 'and he peaked her interest'.”
"I’m still salty."
"I tried to get the agency I was working for to remove this person as a proofreader since I question his/her command of the English language."
"Had a similar problem with the phrase “lynch pin” used metaphorically."
"I stopped working with that agency because it pissed me off so much being 'corrected' incorrectly."- spot_o_tea.
No, that's just an illusion.
"When I told my mom that the clouds were moving and she laughed like I was crazy."-
Did you even read the menu?
"I was in the passenger's seat at a Carl's Jr Drive Thru with a friend."
"He asked what I wanted and I requested the Fried Zucchini."
"He puts half his body through the window to the voice box and goes on this 'My friend here thinks you have some kind of food I know you don't have so I am just going to say it for laughs because you will get a kick out of this'."
"She wants FRIED ZUCCHINI' and starts laughing."
" Well guess who ends up eating fried zucchini."- User Deleted.
And how do you spell that?
"Believe it or not, the pronunciation of my own middle name."- ThePlantie.
We have standards in this community...
"Not me but my Mom tells a story about how she wrote a paper for school about how tough her small town makes it for any new people moving in."
"Basically if you didn't grow up there you were a social outcast for decades and were excluded from a lot of things."
"The teacher didn't agree so she got a bad grade and scoffed at."
"A few years later a news paper reporter essentially wrote the same thing and won a local award for calling out the same small town BS that was going on."- Jberg18.
It's pretty amazing that anyone in this day and age would jump to tell someone they're wrong without having any authority.
Particularly when someone can quickly look up the truth on their phone in less than a minute.
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