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Parents Break Down The Exact Moment They Realized Their Kids Were Spoiled

There really are some outrageously entitled people out in the world. It feels like everyone is obsessed with living the life of a Kardashian, and that obsession, is rotting a lot of humanity.

I use to wait tables in a high end restaurant in Midtown Manhattan, very close to the fashion district. Can you imagine the the type of spoiled nonsense I've witnessed? I've seen behavior that would shock Miranda Priestly herself.

When I see people acting in such ways I'm always curious about how in the world these people became this way. Like, who raised you? Did no one ever slap you around? I'll volunteer.

And what do your parents think about their parenting skills? Because I have a few thoughts.

Redditoru/pleasantvalleyroadwanted parents out there to fess up about the "humans" they've unleashed on the world, by asking:

Parents of reddit, when did you realize you had spoiled your child(ren) to the point that they would need serious help to not grow up an entitled jerk? And did you make changes to how you parent from that point forward?

Rule number one in life...

"You are entitled to nothing!"

Money does not make you better and this isn't your world that the rest of us are merely guests in. Just some mantras to begin with.


kim kardashian school GIFGiphy

"Stopped giving money so they had to get a job to have the things they wanted. Helped a lot."

- notmenotyoutoo

Breaking the Cycle

"Having been abused and neglected as a child, I vowed not to make the same mistake with my own kid. I made a bunch of different ones instead! I didn't discipline here enough, because the only kind of discipline I knew was physical abuse and I refused to do that. In trying to do better I went in the opposite direction, and by the time she was about four years old she was a spoiled, tyrannical brat."

"My husband had worked long hours and wasn't home a lot, and she usually behaved well for him so he was largely ignorant of what was going on. He eventually got permission to work from home a couple days a week and that's when he realized how bad things were. He gently took me aside and pointed out that a four year old should not be screaming at their parents after having been asked to perform a simple task."

"I got therapy to help work through my own issues, and together my husband and I came up with a strategy that allowed me to discipline our daughter without physical punishment. (It took a few tries before we found a strategy that worked.) Then covid happened and now my husband works from home four days a week, which has helped immensely. Our daughter is still spoiled, but her behavior has improved a lot over the last few years to the point that she's usually pleasant to be around, lol. She and I are both a work in progress, but so far the whole family is doing better."

- LJGHunter

Wonder Woman

"I started a relationship with a wonderful woman who puts everyone else first. She has a heart of gold and is the sweetest person I have met. However, this desire to make everyone happy is not how you parent children. She has a moderately autistic child who is 15 and another child who is 13. She created an environment where they rely on her for everything. The 13 yo can't even make himself toast."

"The 15 yo did whatever he wanted because she was more concerned about him being happy than being independent. So far, I've gotten the child with autism to wear underwear, stop peeing anywhere he wants, stop abusing his mom, to begin feeding himself finger foods, and in general, to listen if we ask him to do something. I need to work on the youngest one to start making himself food and to eat something other than just frozen chicken strips and french fries."

- checkmate3001

The Oldest

"My husband had this realization a couple of weeks ago about his oldest. He was shocked when we were at the store and I said no to our toddler, he said ok and didn't whine, I praised him for listening and at that moment my husband was like Holy crap, I think he's more confident and independent than his teen sister, I done effed up with her, haven't I? I just shrugged."

"I told him it's not too late, he just need to keep working on it and not feel guilty about the past. Most people didn't expect a 20 some year old guy to step up and take care of a kid by himself, now that he's older he knows better and going forward can work on building a more positive relationship with his oldest kid which I believe will be helpful to her and might even encourage the confidence and independence she'll need one day. But I'm no expert our kid is very young and most days behaves like all toddlers do 😅."

- 30november

The Son

Fathers Day Dad GIF by GIPHY Studios OriginalsGiphy

"I realised that, because my daughter was so difficult (I have since found out she has ADHD and Autism, like me her Mum), I was letting my Son away with so much more than I would her."

"It was my fiancé that pointed out to me that I was letting him walk all over me for an easy life so I could focus on my youngest and we have made huge changes in the way we discipline him and as a result he is back to the delightful young man he was in the earlier days. I owe a lot to my fiancé actually!"

- Mother-Of-Demon

Rule number 2...

Parents, don't be afraid to parent. Don't try to heal your wounds by allowing a new generation to just do whatever comes into their minds. Raise decent humans, not make-up versions of you.

Tapped Out

sad scream queens GIFGiphy

"My daughter was throwing a fit that her bottle of water was not the brand she wanted so someone asked her why she didn't just drink tap water. Her response was, "what's tap water?" She's 10."

- NefariousnessReal892

The Limit

"Would have to be when my daughter was 15. I set up credit card account for her, set the limit to $500 and told her the card was only for emergencies, such as if she was out somewhere and needed an Uber home. Got the bill the first month, the card had been run to it's limit, $125 at a beauty salon, $200 at various clothing stores and multiple fast food runs."

"So I sit her down and say "Didn't I tell you this card was for emergencies?" She looked me in the eye and calmly said, "Yes, and that's all I used it for." I reply, "And getting your hair done and a sale at Hot Topic are emergencies?!?" She replies, "Yes for someone my age, they are." Needless to say her credit card was quickly revoked."

- Dervrak

Oh Mama...

"Not one of those parents. But my mom never learned. She has spoiled my younger sister since she was a toddler. Sister is now in her mid 40's, and is still an entitled b*tch. To make things even better; my mother has been the child care provider (free childcare) for all three of my sister's kids from the time each was born. So now. Not only are my nieces and nephew being raised by a narcissistic mom. But by their grandmother, that made their mom that way in the first place."

"The last Christmas we went to their house, which was years ago now since it was THAT BAD. All three kids were in various stages of meltdowns because they didn't get what they wanted. And that was the year the kids got brand new iPhones. The oldest was 9. The middle was 7. And the youngest was 5. It's funny listening to our mom be confused about how they are all spoiled brats."

- LowkeyPony

People Break Down Their Greatest Accomplishment On The Internet | George Takei’s Oh Myyy


"I wouldn't say I spoiled her myself, I traveled a lot and just wasn't there for my daughter as much as I should've been. My ex wife, my mom, my MiL all spoiled the hell out of my daughter. I came to the realization after my divorce. I had my daughter for the weekend. She was 4.5 at this point. Not potty trained yet because god forbid she did something that was different."

"I remember sitting on the floor, trying to get her to use the potty and she's just yelling at me that she wants her diapers back. When she went back to her mother's house I get a phone call from my ex, yelling at me for trying to make her use the potty when she wasn't ready."

"My daughter was 4.5 years old! At that point I knew. Did some research, called a behavior specialist and started to get her on the right track. I love her and she's a pretty amazing child. She's still spoiled as hell. I can only do so much with the time I have with her."

- Bullydaddy

Product Placement

Billy Porter Reaction GIF by MOODMANGiphy

"She bullied kids for not having Gucci, supreme, other designer brands, and the latest apple products."

- CaydeWick

Bad Cousins

"I am so thankful that I grew up watching my auntie mess up so much with my cousins. They were so vile because she allowed them to be. She would ask them what they wanted for breakfast lunch or dinner and they would each choose something different from each other, then when she had cooked it and served them they decided they wanted something else, this would go on and on until about 4 meals had been dumped."

"My kids help me choose the weekly meals but there is no faffing, they eat or they don't but if they don't finish at least the vedge and 1 other thing then they don't get anything else or pudding. My cousins used to scream that they wanted stuff from every shop we went in, full on paddy in the middle of the store until she gave in. The first time my oldest tried this I calmly dragged him round the shop screaming whilst I put everything in the basket back then picked him up and walked home without getting anything my other two boys learnt off their brother's mistake. My cousins would run riot anytime we were out of the house running into roads, my auntie screaming like a banshee."

"My boys were on reins from the start, then once they proved they could hold hands without darting the reins were taken off then eventually they could walk next to me without holding hands, we used the traffic lights game so they could run ahead and the moment I said stop they calmly waited until I caught up. Everything I did when they were small has made them absolutely amazing kids/teenagers now. I have had people commenting on how well behaved and how helpful and polite my babies are and I must admit I do look at them every now and then amazed at how I could be so blessed to have 3 absolutely amazing beautiful boys that I absolutely adore."

"Before anyone says that I don't know what it's like with a child with a disability (the normal response I get when I blame the parents for bad behaviour) my middle boy is autistic and dyspraxic with a mental delay and health problems, my youngest is also autistic but undiagnosed because he doesn't need extra help like my middle boy does. They are now 14, 13 and 11 and we have a fantastic relationship, all 3 are happy and healthy to me that's a win as a parent."

- rockchick1982


"Not a parent but a sibling. I'm the oldest of 3. My youngest sibling is 4 and he will walk around demanding everything from both of his parents. His dad will give him whatever he wants and our mom will either ignore my brother or yell at him. The middle kid, my sister who is 13 btw, will throw a screaming fit whenever she doesn't get what she wants."

"And my mom retaliates by screaming back at her, grounding her for a certain amount of time, and then just forgets about it. Meaning my sister just continues to do whatever she wants. When I go to tell my mom that my sister is still grounded she will just get frustrated with me and ignore me."

"Neither my mom or my brothers did do anything to try and change how either of my siblings act. They think I'm the spoiled one bc I've got severe mental problems and have no motivation for anything, so when I sleep in late bc I can't get up they yell at me for being lazy. My mom yelled at me the other day for asking to go to therapy once a week instead of every other week."

- sad_boi_hours69


"I'm not a parent, but rather the oldest sibling. I have to do a lot of the stuff around the house because my mother is a single mother who works nights and sleeps during the day and my 2 siblings don't help at all and they make big messes and my sister, which is the youngest and has microcephaly, gets pretty much whatever she wants and gives me an attitude and my brother is a snob, but he's getting better."

"My mom and dad are split and they cannot come to terms with anything but I tell my mom it's probably best for them to go live with him because his wife is more strict and they would get on track, plus there they have more siblings that aren't as "mean" as me."

- wackthatciddd


excited bad seed GIF by Kim's ConvenienceGiphy

"My first was an only child for over a decade. Whatever he wanted he got"

"I had no problem with this since he was my only "baby." I did not realize the damage until I got pregnant again and he had a hard time accepting the new reality of his life. He fought hard to go against it. It took lots of patience, love and therapy for him to understand having a sibling could be great as he is loved as much as his new sibling. Today he is the most loving, caring big brother ever."

- Musemorte

The 9 Year Old

"When I realized I was an 'enabler' to my 9 yr old son. He was always difficult and would refuse to go to school, clean up, shower or do anything I would ask of him. All he did was ask me for toys and I would give in, using it as a bribe for him to go to school or start listening etc."

"This went on his whole life. It was getting worse till I realized that my buying him toys was just a patch on a deeper issue, which was him suffering from anxiety and depression. I just hated seeing him so sad or angry, and loved his happy face when he got a new toy."

"A year ago I took him to a psychiatrist who diagnosed him with anxiety and depression. He's been on meds ever since, and has barely asked for toys, is happy, goes to school and is a pleasure to be around. I swear to God, if I didn't get him diagnosed and carried on as his enabler, I don't know where he would be as a teen or adult."

- luckysonic2

The Younger One

"Not my kid, but my youngest brother my parents never spoiled me and my older brother because they weren't very financially stable until they had their third kid and me and the oldest spent majority of our childhood at our grandparents while our parents worked."

"After my mam had the third she stopped working because my dad owned his own business and we became really well off (british middle class) and then they had the fourth kid my youngest brother who is 4 now and my mam spends all her time with him and #3 they only noticed how spoiled he was about Christmas last year."

"He gets everything he wants and kicks off whenever he gets punished even if its so much as "you cant play on your xbox for the rest of the day" and now they need to take him to camhs (kids mental health service in the uk) because although he's only four he's become so destructive and stuck up already and its an actual issue."

- Sad-Photograph5348

Motor Issues

"I got a new car at the end of last year when my daughter was almost 15. I kept my old one (2011 Buick Enclave) for several months thinking it would probably make a good first car for her. When I mentioned it to her, she literally said "Nope, I'm not going to drive that thing" in the most embarrassingly entitled way. So I sold it."

"And now rather than a free old car, she's going to have to buy her very own old car (and pay for the insurance). Thankfully she has a job and some time to save her pennies, but she's learning the hard way that my offer was pretty generous and her snotty attitude was all it took for me to rescind it."

- barbberg1898


snl spraying GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy

"With the pandemia, and having to be at home all the time, we bought a lot of things to our 4 year old (books, a trampoline, some toys). One day he got super upset because he wanted something and we said no. We decided we'll give him gifts only on his birthday, children's day and Christmas."

- Lis_9

Nasty Little Fool

"Not a parent (not that old) but a family friend's kid. The little fool is like 9 and is generally more of an a**hole than I am at 17 and am very pissed. He regularly talks crap to people who are more than twice as old, physically harms other kids his age (not seriously but come on) and acts very spoiled the drop of a hat. And his parents complain "idk how he got so spoiled," duh dummy its kinda your fault."

- Maanavdv


Cute GIFGiphy

"I bought mine what ever toy she wanted, let her pretty much own the back yard, pampered her with her with treats. She's also a dog sooooo... yeah going to continue spoiling her. #nevergonnastopme."

- rocket___goblin

See there, a whole lot of people need a good role model to set them straight. Again, I happily volunteer. I'm not saying parenting is easy, but a ton of you can certainly do better. For the world's sake.

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Michael Jerrard on Unsplash

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Content Warning: Mental Health, Suicide, Domestic Violence

We all know that we technically can't make anyone else do anything, and we certainly can't "fix" other people. Other people will only change or do something if they choose to; the only person we can really control is ourselves.

But some people really love to try, often to hilarious and terrible results.

Already cringing, Redditor Dapper_Algae6280 asked:

"People who entered a relationship thinking 'I can fix them,' how did that go?"

Time for an Upgrade

"There is a weird thing that happens when you 'fix' someone. They tend to think if you liked them broken, then they deserve better than you now that they are better than they were."

- TheRealLifePotato

"As horrible as it sounds, to have a happy, emotionally healthy relationship you need two happy, emotionally healthy people. If you want to be in that sort of relationship, you need to fix yourself first."

- inactiveuser247

"This right here. After three sh*tty relationships in a row, I realized this is a me problem. I took a few years off from dating to reflect and really learn to see red flags and understand myself so I wouldn't make that mistake again."

- MikoSkyns

No More Spark

"My now ex had PTSD, depression, and a variety of other issues she claimed. After two and a half years of dating (being my first and only relationship), she became more social, less suicidal, and overall happier as a person."

"She decided to cheat on me with someone else due to 'lack of communication' and us 'no longer having a spark". The irony."

"For context, we were 17 at the time, in high school, and I worked full-time hours with initiatives to hang out, which were refused. Red flags everywhere."

- elteragxo

"Your situation is eerily similar to mine, what the f**k?"

"I met a girl with mental and emotional issues and decided to fix them through a healthy relationship. She recovered and found someone else because 'the spark was gone.'"

- Aimlessdrifter8778

Misery Loves Company

"Now we are both broken."

- Brave-Butterscotch76

"The same thing happened to my sister-in-law. She married a very negative and miserable guy while saying 'he will get better' or 'we’re working on it,' and now she’s a very negative and miserable person."

- Moreofyoulessofme

Getting to Watch a Partner Grow

"At first we were only f**king. I don't know if I ever thought I could fix her, but I did fall in love with this beautiful lady with severe anxiety, depression, and trust issues after being in a domestically violent relationship."

"We were f**k buddies for about six months and I got a glimpse of her issues but I still went ahead and asked her to be my girlfriend The heart wants what it wants."

"We dated for a year and a half (two years since meeting), and I actually got to see her at her worst a few times, but I was finally able to get her therapy with a great psychiatrist and treatment, this is when I asked her to move in with me. We've been living together for six years."

"Four years ago, she had the worst breakdown I've seen. She went full-on paranoid, wall-scratching nervous, she was even doubting me and my motives to be there. It was a very difficult week, and she left the house and went to her mom's house in the middle of the night."

"Eventually, her therapist was able to get a hold of her and get her back to her senses. Her doctor then suggested that I also should go to a counselor or at the very least we should do couples therapy so we had strong bases for our relationship and we did."

"I now look back and won't change her for anything in the world, she has grown so much, and she glows right now. I now see her smile and it's glorious. She's achieved a great position too and it's amazing just to see how much happier she looks."

- Spiritual-Narwhal666

Not a Match

"I fixed what I wanted to fix, but that still didn't make us right for each other. In the end, I think she's in a much happier place than she could have been, so I think it was worth the time invested."

"We were wrong for each other, but at least we both came out better positioned to receive the happiness that would come to us later."

- MrWeb20

In Their Nature

"A couple of months into the relationship, I fixed him."

"After some irritation, he stopped peeing on the carpet. Now, my cat still brings mice, but I guess, that's just his nature."

- mobileJay77

The Importance of Boundaries

"I don't know if I would say that I 'fixed' her (and I wasn’t trying to), but I definitely taught my last ex the importance of being able to set boundaries and to stop going out of her way to please people who consistently hurt her."

"Eventually this would lead to us breaking up, but I have no regrets. I have issues of my own that were wearing her down and she did what she had to. Same rules apply. We’re both better off because of it."

- TylerTexas10

Happily Ever After

"She fixed herself and I fixed myself with each other's support, and we are living happily ever after, it seems, with ongoing work on ourselves and our relationship."

- DonPronote

An Uncommon Ending

"I didn’t fix them. But I tried my hardest to be patient and supportive while they fixed themself. Sometimes I was better at support than other times. Sometimes they were better at fixing than other times."

"It ended up being worth the patience. Things have been great with us for years now. I know this isn’t the normal outcome though, and I feel incredibly lucky."

- I_Invented_Frysauce

A Little Help from Our Friends

"Usually I'm the one people try to fix.. I think the repeated attempts definitely helped me. Now my current partner gets to enjoy the previous hard work."

"...I think I just got tired of hurting the people who love me and fixed myself, though."

- addrien

All Their Idea

"You can't fix anyone. You can only fix yourself, but if you really want to try and fix someone, you have to make it seem like it's their idea."

- BuhrZap

A Helping Hand

"I don't think you can fix anyone. You can only help them fix themselves, which is very different."

"If someone is actively trying to fix themselves, and you can actually be the person to support them through it, then it can work, but it could also not work."

"I do think there should be a distinction between the two. I mean, trying to fix someone is a bad idea, but if you like someone and are willing to support them in their journey to fix themselves, it's probably not the worst idea in the world."

- brooksie1131

Lesson Learned

"It went so well that they managed to cure me of the desire to 'fix' anybody."

"I’ll toss you a life preserver if you’re trying to save yourself. But I’m not jumping in the water with anyone so they can drown me on their way out."

"People who need to hit rock bottom in order to better themselves will use you to soften their landing if you let them."

- GlobalPermit5428

Best Friends Forever

"It went well but it didn’t work out."

"So we kind of fixed each other we were both at very weird points in our lives and we only dated for about one and a half years. We didn’t need a romantic partner but we did need a friend in each other."

"We’re both in better places now and the best of friends. We both want each other to be part of our lives just not as lovers."

"All and all, I say we got the best outcomes in our lives."


So Worth the Investment

"He was an Uber driver with only a high school diploma."

"I married him anyways and bankrolled his education because he was fun as f**k to be around, was the smartest person I’ve ever met, and loves me like I’m the only woman on Earth."

"Now, he’s a computer engineer and we are landlords together and have bought investment properties. We are very happy together."

"Partners work together to create success. I think selfish people ask, 'what’s in it for me?' Marriage is about selflessness."

"I’m glad I sacrificed for his education. His mind would be wasted otherwise and he’s a genius."

- BabyElephantWalks

In most of these cases, the situation went poorly after a Redditor tried to change someone, and for good reason. If that person isn't ready or doesn't want to be fixed, it's only going to damage the relationship.

There's also something to be said about unconditional love. If you don't want to date the person exactly as who they are right now, why are you even trying to date them?

If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988.

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at

Guy at the gym
Anastase Maragos/Unsplash

Tough guys put on a facade that indicates to others that they always know what's going on.

But their confidence doesn't always match their intellect, which is probably why they cover their insecurities by walking around and trying to show everyone who's really the boss.

If that's the case, they should keep their mouths shut because not everything that comes out of their mouth needs to be heard.

Yet, it can be amusing to everyone else.

Curious to hear examples of these, Redditor PrototypeShadowBlitz asked:

"Reddit, what is the stupidest thing you've heard from the 'alpha male' community?"

You might find these guys at a bar.

The Dude Must Be Hungry

"Had a run in once with a group of young lads about something in a bar and one of them said we are top of the food chain bro and you will be the prey."

– insertitherenow

"'Whatever, mall ninja" -proper response."

– TheEighthLord

If The Shoe Fits

"That they were an alpha male."

– I_Have_A_Name37654

"The use of 'Alpha Male,' unironically is every indication that you're dealing with a child's understanding of manhood."

– 88Dubs

Brat Pack

"Me and my bros are all alpha males."

– SonOfDadOfSam

"I was skiing one time and rode the lift with a guy that said, 'I don't feel no pain. I live with 5 roommates and none of us feel any pain.' Okay, bud. That's a really interesting coincidence."

– NicPizzaLatte

They sure thrive on making sexist comments.

Contagious Femininity

"A coworker said, 'I don't spend too much time with my girlfriend because I'll become too feminine.'"

– Lazy_Natural6154


– aliebabadegrote

Sexist Categorization

"I have been called a beta for saying that my wife makes more money than I do. She works in a more lucrative field and is more educated than I am, so it makes perfect sense that she makes more than I do."

"So I came back, and this post has really blown up. There's just a few things I want to clarify."

"1- I have only ever been called a beta online."

"2- I work full-time in project management. I have a master's degree. I have a 6 figure salary."

"3- My wife has a PhD and works in finance. She also has a 6 figure salary, it's just a higher salary than my own."

"4- I'm sorry to anyone who might feel as though my original post misled them."

– ExaminationDouble240

It's Teamwork

"A real man would be proud of his wife for achieving success, and not fall for that sort of insecure bullsh*t."

"It's not a contest, that's the real joke here. Good on you for seeing the big picture."

– Mrbeardoesthethings

Do these roles about parenting sound familiar?

Childish Things Are Too Girly

"Real men don't take their kids trick or treating is one that I heard recently."

– constructionguy89

"Related. Guys who brag about not changing diapers, not playing 'girly' games, etc. Essentially guys who brag that their only contribution to fatherhood is money and masculine things like fishing or football. Even then some of them brag about not paying a lot of child support to prove they didn't let the system take advantage of them."

"I can't imagine a life so empty my only accomplishment worth bragging about was being a terrible parent."

– Green7000

This Woman's Work

"I was told that taking care of my kids is woman's work. Apparently it's concerning that I try to spend so much of my free time with them. Oddly enough the meatheads at my grappling club think it's sweet I occasionally have my daughters' hair clips on and nails painted."

– MrFunktasticc

People discussed rules in the bedroom.

Never Submissive

"That a man is turned off when their wife/girlfriend seduces them, because if she wants sex and shows it she is a sl*t, also making the man the submissive one…"

– kamalaophelia

Stifling Emotions

"Not the whole community, but was cuddling with a guy once and could tell he was trying not to get emotional over something that was bothering him. He said, quite literally, 'it's not alpha male behaviour.' I told him that I liked that he showed emotions sometimes, and he looked disgusted by the fact that I pointed it out."

– LambLifts

In high school, a classmate who was on the football team said I was a "sissy" for listening to classical music.

The other classmates laughed at me, which was hardly surprising since all of the guys on our unbeatable football team were considered stars on campus.

This kind of mockery was a typical day for me.

I can laugh at their idiotic comments now but back then, I don't know why I ever let them get under my skin.

Man standing behind large flowers
Quinn Buffing on Unsplash

We've all done things, or in some cases, regularly do things that others might consider weird.

Even so, we often feel no shame or embarrassment and embrace how unusual these habits are, and take our friends teasing or laughing at us for doing so in stride.

Sometimes, however, we might not like to advertise some of our unusual habits or actions and make every effort to keep them a well-guarded secret.

As raised eyebrows are much easier to take than blatant judgment from friends and peers.

Redditor Key_Nectarine_1969 was curious to hear all the weird things people have done which they still keep under lock and key, leading them to ask:

"What’s the weirdest thing you’ve done that you could only tell people anonymously?"

The Devil [Dogs] Is In The Detail...

"All throughout middle school, there was someone who tucked unwrapped Hostess Devil Dogs into the toilet paper dispensers in the bathrooms, so that when you pulled some toilet paper out, the devil dog would fall out into your hand."

"We had to have an assembly about it."

"That person... Was me."- bejeweled_sky

Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time

"Was drunk at an escape room with coworkers."

"It was an extreme one where you are handcuffed the entire time."

"I decided in my drunken state that it would be bada** to dislocated my thumb and slip off the cuffs like the movies."

"It wasn't."

"We got kicked out, my coworkers were weirded out and I had to go to the hospital."

"I quit a few weeks later."

"White collar wasn't for me."- Grotesque-penguin

The Bread Of Heaven

"Stole over 1,000 wafers from church because I really liked the communion wafers & didn’t know where else to get them."

"I felt really blessed & cursed for a long time."- hALLIEcinate

catholic the exorcist GIFGiphy

Retracing Steps...

"Once I got off the subway in NYC and I was super early for an appointment."

"So I picked a random guy and just followed him on foot for like 30 minutes, pretending I was like a private detective or something."

"Always kept about a half block behind."

"He turned this way and that, and eventually went into a building I had lived in 9 years earlier."

"It was weird, and so was I."- OKsurewhynotyep

Hygeine Be Damned...

"I found a dead rat in a field when i was younger and kissed it bc I wanted to say goodbye."- qeleia

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Bad Decisions Have A Way Of Getting Back To You...

"We got super drunk and ate a ton of spicy food in New Orleans."

"Back at the B&B, the food started to come out the back side."

"I was sitting on the toilet sh*tting bricks of fire."

"At that moment, the booze decided to hang a u-turn."

"The trash can was out of reach and I couldn't risk standing up from the toilet for even 5 seconds."

"The closest receptacle was the bathtub."

"I managed to turn in such a way that I could keep shi*ting in the toilet while projectile vomiting into the tub."

"Both ended up clogged, and there was no plunger."

"I had to call the owner to explain that I had destroyed both their toilet and their tub simultaneously."- HoopOnPoop

Things Best Left To Professionals...

"My partner is weirdly prone to cysts."

"I had to drain a 3 inch cyst on her back (thankfully she had a dr's appt the next week), then multiple other little cysts on her legs and chest."

"I never told her to her face but that first giant cyst literally haunted me, the amount of pus and blood I saw....good heavens."- SleepyBiologist

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At Least A Lesson Was Learned...

"When I was walking to school one morning, I saw a kid (7-8 yo?) kicking a dog."

"I ran over & kicked the kid and asked him how it felt."

"He ran off and no one saw."

"Still not sorry."- sneezyailurophile

All Creatures Deserve Love

"I was extremely socially isolated as a child and tried to make friends with the coyotes who lived in the woods by our home."

'I caught one in a snare and fed and kept her."

"I wanted a friend."- letthetreeburn

That's What Friends Are For...

"My wife and her best friend pick me up from a frat party black out drunk."

"Then they helped me take a sh*t on the toilet, wiped my a** and then gave me a shower and put me to bed naked."

"Don’t remember any of it."- nc3100

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Not The Right Kind Of Manure...

"One time I went outside at like 2AM and put the garden hose nozzle into my butthole and sprayed some water into it, then farted it out onto the lawn."

"Basically gave myself an enema with a garden hose."

"I did this because I was bored."

"My neighbour saw me and told my dad (lived at home at the time)."- WaspsInMyGoatse

A Little Fantasy Now And Then...

"When I was younger I joined an international dating site that I figured was a scam."

"Put a black square as my picture and gave myself a fake name, and then looked through their users."

"And after about 10 minutes I had like a 100 messages."

"Most of them were messages telling me how handsome I was or how these women fell in love with me at first site."

"Now I knew it was a scam but when ever I felt down or got rejected for a while I would pop back on the site and read a few messages."

'Yeah it’s kinda cringy and probably pathetic but it made me feel better."

"I would just turn off that logical part of my brain that knew it was a scam for awhile and just pretend I was this popular and desirable guy."

"And it honestly got me through the day sometimes."- Demonking3343

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If anyone says they've never done anything they're ashamed, or at the very least less-than-proud of, in all likelihood, they are lying.

Or, more likely, they understandably want to pretend that it never happened.

Which might be a little easier than harboring a secret.