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Sometimes "nice" and "kind" don't perfectly align.


"Nice" often describes social politeness. We use the word to describe people that can talk the talk well enough to embody the image of a good person who thinks about others first and doesn't ever step on toes.

But is that always the best approach to interacting with others?

Sometimes kindness requires confrontation. A more active, direct demeanor can lead to more substantial and worthwhile connections with others.

A recent Reddit thread asked for the finest examples of people being "nice" without being "kind."

berkel-is-a-madlad asked, "What's something 'nice' people do, that juts pisses you off?"

Clogging Everything Up

"Letting me turn left at the stop sign when they're going straight. YOU WERE THERE FIRST JUST F***ING GO." -- collinnator5

"Rule of thumb when driving: Don't be polite; be predictable." -- DP_Lover

"Stopping in the middle of busy road to let a Jay Walker cross.." -- Grapesoda2223

Stalemate

"'Go ahead.'"

"'Oh, no, you go ahead.'"

"'It's cool, you go ahead.'" -- TheButtUglySwans

"The Canadian Standoff." -- MyNameThru

"There could be a wizard on the other side of that door! I'm not trying to be nice, I'm trying to save my hide!" -- SiroMPP

Too Much Hang Time  

"Holding the door open for me when I'm more than 15 feet away from the door. Also the waving me through a stop sign when they have the right of way like mentioned earlier." -- Dinx81

"Don't break your pace. Hold your arm behind you if you think the next person can grab it in time, but otherwise just let it go. Doors aren't impossibly heavy anyway." -- UltimaCaitSith

"Also, in covid times, opening the door for me period. I do not know how to respond to this." -- MermaidRumspringa

Dishonest and Evasive 

"I'm overweight. I hate it when people pretend I'm not overweight. It's totally fine if they think I'm pretty or attractive or simply not ugly despite or because of my weight, but they can't say I'm not." -- Silver-Thing2724

"I have some stick friends who are always like "gosh I'm so fat" and if I say anything about me being fat they go "omg nooo you're so skinny!!" like bruh I am visibly bigger than you pls stop" -- AdditionalBread1

Questionable Motives

"People who help those in need, but then feel the need to film it or post about it on social media. Why? Just help in private and stop humiliating them." -- future_nefertiti

"I used to work with someone that did this. So unbelievably annoying and only makes the person look worse." -- crazylittlemermaid

"Obligatory Steve Buscemi was a volunteer firefighter and helped during 9/11 but he made sure no one knew about it." -- Phil-Michaels

Let's Dial It Down a Notch

"Aggressive morning greetings. Ok hear me out on this. I understand it's 'polite' to greet people when you walk in to the office, but when I have headphones on and you aggressively say good morning over and over, louder and louder, until I have to respond, not cool."

"Just let me be."

-- Ahnamal

Please Hold All Applause Until the Very End

"When people feel the need to bless me with EVERY sneeze. I'll sneeze 5+ times and people will really start to get frustrated with me for having to say bless you too many times."

"Not even God himself can bless me that much!"

-- MellowMikeTho

Thoughtful vs. Nosy 

"I understand the reason and know they do it with the best intentions but ...the prying that some nice people do- learn how to take a hint and drop it." -- Maskholer

"That's kinda messed up, people who pry like that are not nice imo. A nice person would respect boundaries." -- olivermorning

Demanding Masked Emotions 

"Harass me to smile. Does it look like my job to be the cheery background character to their life?" -- 3FoolsinaTrenchcoat

"Their premise appears to be that you are obliged to express yourself only in ways they find enjoyable."

"This is not the behavior of one who views another as an equal, IMO." -- JustAPerspective

Passivity Is Not an Asset

"Being spineless. Standing up for yourself and having opinions does not automatically make you a bi*** or a Karen."

"You can very politely disagree with people or ask for a store employee to fix an issue."

-- Altrano

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