People Break Down Which Things They Saw Or Heard As A Child That Haunt Them To This Day
Children have memories––and they're very long. That's why child development professionals stress the importance of communicating with children should they experience a traumatic event. Listening and encouraging them to share their feelings (even if you can't answer all their questions right away) is essential.
"Reassurance is the key to helping children through a traumatic time," according to a guide from the United States Department of Health and Human Services. "Very young children need a lot of cuddling, as well as verbal support. Answer questions about the event honestly, but do not dwell on frightening details or allow the subject to dominate family or classroom time indefinitely. Encourage children of all ages to express emotions through conversation, writing, or artwork and to find a way to help others who were affected by the event."
People shared their stories after Redditor bmrugger asked the online community,
"What did you witness or overhear as a child that still haunts you today as an adult?"
Warning: Some sensitive material ahead.
"From my bed..."
"From my bed, if the doors were both open, I could see my parents' bed. I heard noises and woke up one night, and saw them going at it. Made sure my door was closed EVERY NIGHT from then on."
Definitely on the more lighthearted side, but we get it, we get it.
"When my father saw me..."
"My father met my mother when she was very young in a foreign country. Due to the age difference (he was 40, she was 25) they would argue a lot. My mom, being young, wanted to go out a lot and live her life. I walked up into their room once my father trying to suffocate my mother with a pillow. I was around 6 years old.
When my father saw me he completely stopped (he loved me so much despite the problems with my mother), and jumped in to hug me, and took me to the other room. She called the police and put a restriction order on him.
To this day my mother says I saved her life, but that image has never left."
We're glad to hear your mother's alive and doing well.
"As I was walking away..."
"When I was 9 years old, my mom had a hysterectomy, so my aunt came over to babysit me for a few days while she was in the hospital. The day my mom was supposed to come home, she called the house and asked to speak to my aunt. My aunt is hard of hearing, so she put the phone on speaker.
As I was walking away, I heard my mom say "she can't hear you, right?". My aunt replied no, and my mom proceeded to tell her that there were complications with the surgery and that the night before as she had gotten up to go to the bathroom, her stitches had come undone. She bled out onto the floor and a nurse found her on the ground. She was worried she wasn't going to make it.
I'm not sure why my aunt didn't think I couldn't hear all of this while the phone was on speaker. I pretended I didn't hear anything, and ran up to my room, crying the entire night thinking my mom wouldn't come home.
Everything turned out fine and she was back home a week later. But at 9 years old, overhearing her describe that situation still haunts me."
We're sorry you had to hear that. That must have been so frightening. Happy it worked out.
"I stayed the night..."
"At 9 years old I walked in on my uncle beating my aunt."
"I stayed the night with my cousins often. They were 8 and 4. My aunt and uncle had just split because my aunt caught him cheating and found out he was addicted to drugs. My cousins were upset and my mom thought it might cheer them up if I stayed the night with them. The next morning I heard screaming from the garage. We went to see what was going on and see him hitting my aunt. My dad had a friend who lived just a couple of houses down so I told my cousins we needed to hide and we went to his house. His wife was home and I told her what was going on. She brought us inside and called 911 then my parents. My uncle was gone before the police got there but he was arrested and sent to prison. My aunt didn't have any serious physical injuries thankfully."
"When I was around 7 or 8, I was in a grocery store during an armed robbery. My family was at the check-out when 2 people came in and started yelling and shooting. They told everyone to lay down on the ground and my mom laid on top of me, but I could see when they shot one of the grocery store employees just a few yards away from me. The robbers ran outside and were confronted by the police in the parking lot and arrested. I believe the man shot ended up dying in the store, but I'm not 100% sure of it. My parents acted like nothing happened and never talked to me about it."
They should have talked to you. We're sorry for your pain.
"She doesn't work for us anymore..."
"I had a 36-year-old employee and eventually, I had to learn to approach her very carefully because if I moved quickly, she would instantly cower, then sit up and (every time) say, "Sorry. It's not you."
"After the 3rd or 4th time, I had a meeting with her and a female HR rep (I am male) and said, "I'm not trying to get into your personal business, but I have to ask. When I approach you and you react, is it because of something happening now? If it is, we can help. If you want."
"Totally deadpan, she says, 'No. It's not like that, but if my father ever comes here to the office, I'll take you up on that offer'
"Get's up and walks out. Just like that."
"She doesn't work for us anymore, and I hear she and her family are doing great, but I get violent thoughts of being the instrument of that poor woman's retribution when I imagine who her father is and almost wish he had come after her at work."
"I was five."
"My brother's death. I was five; he was two. Mom tried CPR on him. She was a nurse. He had undiagnosed cystic fibrosis (he was adopted, so no family medical history was known.) Took me decades to get over that."
"I later found out..."
"I was about six at a party at my dad's secretary's house. He thought it'd be funny to throw me (fully clothed and unable to swim at the time) into the pool and laugh at me in front of everyone. I was so humiliated and embarrassed that my own father would use me as a prop to make his moron friends laugh.
I later found out he was f****** his secretary on the side and is the father of her daughters."
That was not okay. This should go without saying, but you should not have been used in such a way and certainly not by your parent.
"To get to town..."
"Don't remember my age, but it was before I was old enough to ride a 10-speed. I lived on one of the busiest two-lane US roads in my state when I was growing up, at the intersection of a county road, which had a stop sign. For context, the US road had a 50MPH (~80kph) speed limit in that area back then. One day, a motorcyclist thought he was fast enough and could turn off the county road onto the busy US road in front of a loaded semi-truck. I didn't see it because I turned away but I heard the thud and crash.
They had to wash the guy off the road with a fire hose.
To get to town I had to ride my bike on the shoulder along the side of the busy road, which for a week was covered in blood and brain matter from the hose down. Edit: added speeds."
"Then a car pulled up..."
"I was probably 7 or 8 and playing in front of my upstairs bedroom window. I liked to watch cars go by while I was playing. And there were two streets that ran parallel to each other in front of my house. They were only separated by a creek.
Then a car pulled up across the street from my house. Inside a male driver and female passenger were arguing. Then the man punches the woman right in the face over and over.
I ran past my Mom yelling "A man is hitting a woman!" And I ran outside heading for the stairs. I guess at 7 or 8 I was going to somehow save the woman. I get to the top of the stairs just as my Mom catches up to me and the car peels out and drives away.
I'm 49 now, so for at least 40 years, I've thought about that poor woman. I hope she got away from that guy."
It's difficult to grow up and carry around trauma. Thankfully, there are resources out there. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network, for example, does excellent work. SAMHSA's National Center for Trauma-Informed Care and National Center for Trauma Informed Care are just two other options. Get the help you need today.
Have some of your own stories to share? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments section below.
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We may not like it, but getting older is pretty inevitable.
With age may come wisdom, but it also comes with lots of responsibilities.
And some days, we're just over it.
Redditor brick_layer asked:
"What tasks are you tired of doing as an adult?"
Decisions, Decisions
"Deciding what to make for dinner."
- PortiaEss
"I would eat people kibble if it tasted good. Bachelor Chow (just add beer) needs to be a real thing."
- chaos8803
Hi, Ho, Hi, Ho
"Going to work and acting like a functional person."
- ovelanimimerkki
"Yep, I hate trying to work when I'm not emotionally stable or just exhausted. And you literally can't tell anyone or they tell you to go get a coffee which just makes the week go downhill over time."
- gg_ff_42069
Manners
"Being polite to other adults who don't deserve it."
- 25_-a
"Also known as the 'I am too old for this sh*t' phase of life."
- Zintao
Cleaning
"Cleaning the fridge. 🤢 when I find something way in the back that’s been forgotten."
- joydobson
"I finally cleaned out ours today because it was trash day, and the husband isn’t home to argue with me about how that sauce from 2015 is 'still good!!' 🤨 Now I have an empty fridge with just the bare essentials. Worth it."
- Grizelda_Gunderson
Circle of Life
"Working. Paying bills. Getting up early. Doing stuff."
- guyfromcroswell
"Agreed. Such a mundane cycle indeed."
- Emotional_Ratio_3251
Is Naked So Bad?
"Laundry grrrrr."
- FewPizza7880
"I tend to put the laundry in, hear it beep, forget about it for 6 hours then remember it needs to dry."
- marvel_is_wow
Traffic
"Anticipating the morons on the roads that change lanes without signaling."
"Or merging into 70mph traffic while doing 45..."
- haveyouseenthebridge
"Or being stuck behind those people as we're merging, I get pissed. Like speed up to the flow of traffic, being behind them merging puts me in danger too."
- Nigel_IncubatorJones
Maintenance
"Buying a house is an endless list of shit that needs fixing or improving."
- muffbiscuits
"This is one of the many reasons I bought a condo. The majority of the maintenance is somebody else’s problem. I haven’t cut grass, raked leaves or shoveled snow in almost a decade."
‐ yogaballcactus
Teeth
"Brushing my teeth. It's annoying."
- scottevil110"
"I feel this deep. It’s flossing for me."
- brick_layer
"Wait until you're in your 60s and all of a sudden the perfect teeth that never even had a cavity now all of a sudden have tiny cracks and need porcelain crowns and you have constant pain and Delta Dental only covers cleanings and x-rays and a single crown is like $1500 and they're telling you that you need four and you think, well, we don't really need two cars, I could sell my old Subaru."
- Nobody_Wins_13
Alarming
"Waking up to an alarm clock."
"I've been waking up to an alarm clock almost every day since 1985, and I'm fucking tired of it."
"I want to wake up when I'm done sleeping."
"I don't want to wake up and find that I've slept through/turned off my alarm(s) yet again, and have to choose between packing a lunch and taking a shower."
- thisbuttonsucks
What part of adulthood are you tired of?
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I would love to know how people don't fear death.
I mean, it's the end. Life will be over. That kind of sucks.
Yet there are people who find tranquility in it.
Can you teach the rest of us?
Redditor deensuk wanted to hear from everyone who has a calmness about the heading to the afterlife. They asked:
"People who are not scared of death, why?"
I have a constant fear of death. I wanna perfect the ending of "Death Becomes Her" so I can live forever.
Before
"I'm not scared of death because of working in health care I was around it so much. I AM scared of what leads to death, however."
Full-Mulberry5020
Why now?
"Why should I be scared now of something that's only going to happen at the end of my life?"
User Deleted
"I did this cult thing called the landmark forum and I actually did like their “meaning of life”: the meaning of life is that there is no meaning. Life is empty and meaningless. There is no answer."
"Life is what you make of it and every persons answer is equally valid because there is no meaning to life. Life exists as, basically, an accident, we are all here by complete accident, there’s no great mystery, it’s all biology and you are 100% free to make life about whatever it is you want."
Conservative_HalfWit
Death and I are good friends...
"I was very sick as a child. Spent ages 7-20 in and out of hospital due to kidney issues. Lost a kidney at 28. Almost died during the surgery to removed the dead kidney due to blood loss. Had 5 surgeries back to back during the next 2 years. Twice they had difficulties bringing me out of anesthesia."
"Found my favorite aunt dead in her bed when I was 22. Watched my best friend die from a brain tumor at 30. Death has been a constant force in my life. Sometimes just on the edges waiting, sometimes unexpected staring me in the face. I'm not afraid because it's always been there. I now work in healthcare. Death and I are good friends."
Tiny_Teach_5466
No Worries
"Because it's coming for us all, sooner or later. So there's no point in worrying about it. I am much more concerned about day to day minutiae. The Lars von Trier film Melancholia starring Kirstin Dunst portrayed this perfectly. If there was an asteroid hurtling towards the earth, I'd probably be more preoccupied with worrying about whether I left the back light on or not."
Giallo_submarine
It's Over
"Because no one has ever made it out alive, and I was dead for an eternity before I was alive, and didn't suffer the slightest inconvenience because of it."
MarshallApplewhiteDo
I never thought about the before much. I hope the before is quick.
The Effects
"I hope that when my times comes it will be merciful. My uncle had a stroke, he is paralyzed. My grandmother is 91, but is losing all her memories of her life. Death does not scare me, what could be left of me before I die is what terrifies me."
M1ssy_M3
No Terror
"It’s like when the writer Nabokov said that he saw a picture one time, a picture of before he was born. It was a picture of his mother, his brother and sister that were older than him, but he had not been born yet. He said that when he saw that picture there was no terror in him, even though he was looking at a picture where he didn’t exist."
im_on-the_can
state of nonexistence...
"I'm not afraid of death, I'm afraid of dying. Death is just the state of nonexistence I experienced before I was born. I don't remember it because I didn't exist yet. Death will be the same way. I just don't want the transition to be marked by pain and sorrow at things left unfinished. I want it to be quick, painless, and with me surrounded by love."
Wazula42
I'm Gone...
"Because once I die, I won't know it. I won't miss people or regret things or feel pain or sadness about anything. I might fear being sick and slowly dying, just having to live with the knowledge that it's all going to end and this is the last time I'll ever see the people I love or taste good food or hear good music. That sounds almost unbearable. But death isn't even a thing, it's just having done something (died)."
"It's like virginity, it's a made-up state of being that just says whether or not you've experienced a specific occurrence. Once I die, I'm gone. My corpse will be the empty wrapper I used to be in, just garbage to be disposed of in whatever way makes my survivors feel better. I'll be switched off. If I don't worry about what the light feels after the bulb burns out, why would I be afraid of being dead?"
SallyHeap
At Peace
"I’m scared now because I have young kids. Once my kids are old enough to be on their own I imagine the fear will subside and I’ll have a more relaxed approach."
User Deleted
Some very interesting perspectives. May it all calm peacefully and with great mercy for us all.
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Dating and the search for love and companionship... What a nightmare.
This journey plays out nothing like in the movies.
Every Prince or Princess (or everything in BTW) seems to have a touch of the psycho.
The things people say during what should be simple dinner conversation can leave a dining partner aghast.
Like... do you hear you?
Redditor detroit_michigldan wanted to discuss all the best ways to crash and burn when trying to make a romantic connection. They asked:
"You're on a date and it's going really great. What can another person say to ruin it completely?"
I once had a guy ask me if I was willing to follow him into the woods, depending on the price of the meal.
Yeah. No steak is worth that.
Plans After...
"Thanks for the ride but I have a date with someone else, I figured you wouldn't drive me if you knew I was going on a date with someone else and I really needed a ride."
"Online dating, talked to her for a while, finally got the courage to ask her out and then she said that as we got there."
iareyours
Mirror Image
“'You look just like my wife!'”
catalinachild
"I did have a guy tell me I reminded him of his son. I don’t believe English has a word to adequately describe my feelings at that time."
UnicornMagicRainbow
"That would definitely do it."
chaotica78
Third Wheel
"'Hope you don't mind if my mother joins us.'"
ofsquire
"Actually had a girl do this on a first date because she had anxiety issues. Honestly wasn’t bad except that 90% of the time she was silent and her mom talked over her."
"I didn’t mind that much and wouldn’t have minded trying again when she was more comfortable except that she was let go at the company we worked at and she deleted her social media profiles and she never responded on her number. Ah well."
Seightx
Liar
"'Hey bro aren't you gay? I made out with you last night.'"
"Random dude I've never seen before in front of my (f) date."
JHXC16
Was he lying though?
Filter Issues
"'You looked better on Tinder.'"
waqasnaseem07
"Isn’t it basic knowledge that everybody looks slightly worse than the worst picture you can find?"
no_user_ID_found
The Past
"'My ex used to do that too.'"
xxIvyOF
"Yep. I’ve definitely had two otherwise-decent-guy date-situations sour because the ex-comparisons just would not stop flowing. No woman wants to be seen as interchangeable—I’m not here to perfectly fill that ex-sized hole in your life. Focusing on the present moment and a future we could build together is a courtesy we need to grant each other in earliest dates of dating."
LarkScarlett
Powerless
"'I'm an alpha, you cant handle my top energy.'"
Midnightgay28
"I actually left a dude in the middle of dinner, in part, for saying this. I ordered an Uber under the table while pretending to listen to him. Went to the bathroom, and never came back. That was when I was young. Now I’d just say, 'How about we enjoy this meal in silence, before we head our separate ways.'”
UnicornMagicRainbow
Mommy...
"'Mother says I should be back by 9.'"
"Saying 'mother says' just feels weird."
bunnyrut
"That gives me Norman Bates vibes."
Werewolf_lover20
"'Mother says alligators are aggressive because they have an overabundance of teeth, but lack a toothbrush.'"
sodaextraiceplease
Obvs...
"'If you were going to be murdered, what method would you prefer. Purely hypothetical. Obvs.'"
Specific_Tap7296
If it looks anything like a Dateline NBC episode... RUN!
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Despite the advancement of technology rendering people left to their own devices–literally–to entertain them, there are some leisurely activities that will never go out of style.
Or so you would think.
Do people still knit to pass the time? Are people actively collecting stamps?
It depends on who's asking.
Curious to hear about hobby trends, Redditor gizehgizeh asked:
"What are once popular hobbies that are slowly dying these days?"

Before we've become conditioned to living on our phones, these activities used to keep people occupied.
Before Texting, There Was This
"Letter writing."
– littlekingMT
Literal And Tangible Joy
"Well the internet killed pen pals for sure. I do remember I had a Japanese girl for a penpal maybe back in 2007 or so. I honestly don't remember how it started, pretty sure some website, but that was a fun experience. But now I can just straight up talk to foreign people real time, lol. But yea getting a physical letter that someone took the time to write and mail still is hard to beat feelings wise."
– skyburnsred
Model Trains
"When I was growing up, every town had a model train store in it. Now I have one in region and everything else has to be bought online."
– Hairy_Effective1172
Pretty Rocks
"Don’t see anyone playing marbles anymore, I had an awesome collection in school."
– sheeple85
"I had some marbles as a kid in the 90s. My grandma got them for me and I had no idea what I was supposed to do with them. I always imagined them as a thing kids in the 40s played with."
– Ryoukugan
People Were Moving Canvases
"Paintball has been dying a slow death since 2006. Sad, really."
– hobo_recycler
Before the general population began hating clutter, collecting was once a "thing."
Precious Coins
"Coin collecting... I'm a silver/gold nut and I'm always hunting for precious metal coins. whenever I go into a shop they get all excited because 'no one under 70 collects coins anymore.'"
– ThatFishySmell99
Post It
"Stamp collecting."
– spooky_scully_mulder
"Collecting in general, really. Of course there are still prominent collectors but it's slipped more into enthusiast and niche territory than being a popular hobby that you might expect anyone to have."
– iuytrefdgh436yujhe2
What A Gem
"Rockhounding was immensely popular back in the 1950's and 1960's. Personally, I think it's a fascinating and fulfilling hobby, but when I go to a meeting at a rock and gem club, I'm usually the youngest one in the room by several decades."
– filthy_lucre
People once enjoyed making things.
Admiring The View
"Stained glass. I learned how to make it from my old man, and my junior high art class teacher also taught it. Very few artisans are still around."
– brobeanzhitler
Metal Vocation
"Black smithing."
– kenworth117
"I bought a forge to try. It’s insanely hard work, and crazy expensive. I still haven’t finished a piece."
– DSentvalue
Scrapbooking
"Yeah. I'm watching the arts and crafts stores around me completely uninstalling their racks for specialty paper. Now the only thing they have is mega packs of repeating colors/images. To boot all the inclusions like papercraft/die-cut things, washi tape, scissors, stickers, etc have gotten so expensive I would rather go buy $5 bags at value village to get an assortment of things versus buying anything new. I really, really miss yard sales for the same reasons."
– Phantasmai
I envy people who have jobs that are basically their hobbies.
Not everyone gets paid doing what they actually enjoy and have a profound level of passion for.
If they do, kudos to them.
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