Between the Lularich sensation and the stories coming from film and entertainment employees about their dangerous and sometimes deadly working conditions, there's been a lot of chatter about "not-technically-a-cult-but-totally-a-cult" situations.
Reddit user "swiggityswoogey" asked:
The responses are ... telling. Take a look, and then take some time to really think about what you read. Has this stuff impacted you?
Maybe someone you love?
Let's get into it.
The Dramastage fright dance GIF by The Head And The Heart Giphy
"Drama club. The actors are one cult and the tech kids are a whole different, weirder cult that literally operates in the shadows." - dieinafirenazi
"The tech guys are the secret society that really runs the theater. The actors are just props with legs, and even the leads are just props with legs and lines." - bigmcstrongmuscle
"I did visual arts in university and our program shared the fine arts building with the theatre and theatre tech program. Yes. They're cult-like. And they're weird and annoying about it." - catby
"I never did tech in school, but got pulled into tech by my sister, who worked in community theater. When you are up at 3 a.m. breaking down a set after the play is done, you feel the culty." - Joninokc007
The Fandomfans GIF by Billboard Music Awards Giphy
"Fandoms when they reach a certain level."
"I know of someone that YEARS later was still receiving harassment because they made the blasphemous mistake of disagreeing with a certain Supernatural shipping-pairing."
"We're talking criminal harassment leading to lost jobs, swatting, the works."
"And that's just an example, there are so many other fandoms that are as bad or worse. I mean cast and crew have been harassed, sometimes completely out of their homes, by obsessed fans in the past." - amalgamas
"I know Jared Padalecki's wife (who he met on the show when she played Ruby) had to stop coming to conventions because fans were literally horrible to her, like death-threat level." - orangestar17
"I was into the Marvel Cinematic Universe fandom for three years and it is 100% a cult."
"They don't even celebrate the source material anymore - it's more like a nonstop celebration of weird headcanons involving straight characters they reinterpret as gay. The people in these groups even refer to each other as family, myself included at one time."
"I eventually started ignoring the fandom and just watched the movies and the shows with my actual family. It's been one of the best decisions I've ever made regarding entertainment." - DastenHero
We're Not FamilySeason 2 Cheers GIF by Pose FX Giphy
"Some workplaces. The ones that push the "we're all family here" attitude especially." - mikenyle
"Workplaces that push the 'we're family' attitude are doing it solely to create a sense of obligation to the company while stifling the idea of being fairly compensated, because you're just supposed to help out family without asking for anything in return."
"Nevermind that they'll drop you like a sack of bricks if it suits them, because they know the 'we're family' thing is just a ruse to get you to sacrifice yourself for them, for basically nothing." - remotetissuepaper
"Companies that are really like families never need to tell you, because it shows in how well you're treated."
"Kind of like with actual families, if they keep invoking 'family' they're probably abusing you." - Big-Goose3408
Cults Don't Feel Like CultsSarcastic Twitch GIF by Hyper RPG Giphy
"Honestly, cults don't feel like cults to those in them. Everything is set up to make it all feel normal. It works particularly well because cults prey upon those who are lonely and searching for a sense of belonging."
"Usually there's some religious aspect and some nebulous threat to fight against. It's designed to make people involved feel safe, like they're doing good, and like they'd be nothing without the cult."
"The cult at Jonestown, People's Temple, started as a church that was trying to help people of color in Indiana. It was primarily elderly people at the start of it all."
"People who were alone, people who wanted to do good. So they gave everything they had for the cause. As it grew, more varied people came into the picture, but it started as a church trying to help people - but with a predatory leader." - mycatwinky
Jeepers Creepersdance party jeep GIF Giphy
"Jeepers. They're the Furries of the automotive world." - biggest____chungus
"Omg. This... The "Silly boys jeeps are for girls" stickers make me gag." - contactlenz
"This. My mom was finally able to get the jeep she's been wanting for 20 years and she got initiated one day."
"Some of it is pretty cute actually, someone put a rubber duck in the jeep and there's this whole jeep wave thing."
"But yeah, it's culty. There's an entire culture around this type of vehicle and soon they're doing an event where a giant rubber duck will be passed off to drivers and travel around the country." - Gamer-Logic
"I own a JKU and absolutely love it - It's very complimentary to my lifestyle."
"But HOLY SH*T I can't stand the majority of the Jeep community. I'm a member of the area's Facebook page and everyone is either holier than thou Jeep purist or posting about their new order of rubber ducks from Amazon."
"I really liked the Jeep because we had one when I was little and now I'm associated with these idiots." - lankyd*ck
"As a Jeep owner, I 100% agree."
"I use mine to go on nice country drives with my wife, and as a way to enjoy the countryside. Fellow Jeep owners act like I'm committing some sacrilege because I don't want to tear around in some muddy field, or try to drive up a rock." - EarhornJones
"I came here to say this. I have been a Jeep guy my whole life."
"First car I drove was my parent's Jeep Cherokee when I was 8 or 9ish. I have owned one pretty much my entire adult life BUT I'm not part of the Jeep culture everyone hates."
"First, I have a Cherokee (93 so still a "real" offroad capable Jeep but since it's not a Wrangler people don't care about it.)"
"Second, I don't have anything flashy on my Jeep and it's more of a sh*tbox than everyone in the new Wranglers, but I drive it and use it like a Jeep."
"Third, I can't stand the whole 'Its a Jeep, you gotta wave' crap or the 'ducking' Jeeps thing everyone does. My local Jeep groups on Facebook only seem to care about ducks and waves and light bars."
"That said, and like someone else already said, there are two different types of Jeep people."
"There's the mall crawler, light bars before lockers, parking on a curb because it's a Jeep, check out my angry eye grill Jeeps..."
"...and there's the rest of us that don't care how she looks as long as it will get down a trail or through the rocks like we want." - struhall
Moms Losing Moneymelissa mccarthy the boss movie GIF Giphy
"I got tricked into going to an MLM meeting by a friend. Was supposed to be like a 'girls seminar.' I had actually just left a religious cult (ICOC) and it had the exact same vibe, except based around Amway."
"Closed but seemingly open & friendly, but aggressive, social circle. Motivational sounding, use of tons of buzzwords, hiding information, put in a lot of money for little gain."
"I had no idea how deep MLMs went to keep you locked in." - savwatson13
"Oh they absolutely feel like a cult, if you aren't buying into it."
"One of my best friends in high school grew up indoctrinated into Amway. I went with his family once to one of their big 'business meetings' or wtf exactly they call them just to hang out and get out of town."
"I already didn't buy into, and the 'meeting' is still one of the most bizarre experiences of my life."
"This huge auditorium with a stage had a couple hundred people seated. Popular (at the time) but completely irrelevant music was being blasted on speakers like I was at a damn concert, you had to yell over it."
"After a bunch of group singalongs, the leaders humble bragged about how good they have done recently and whatever fancy car one of them had bought with cash (ooooh /s) and how by following these 3 or 4 incredibly broad and vague steps, you too could be one the 5 people on stage instead of sitting in that crowd of hundreds."
"It felt like a reskinned Sunday service ramped up well beyond 11 and about as genuine as your average congressman." - WitchOfTheSword
"Watching the Amazon series on LuluRoe made me realize humans just really REALLY like being a part of a tribe, don't we?"
"It's engrained into our animal brains still. Herd animals through and through. Every convention looked just like a church, a comic con, a concert etc. We want to look up to someone and be someone to look up too."
"It's always good to be a part of something and a community, it makes us feel safe, but I guess the line is drawn when you start surrounding yourself with just that ONE tribe." - Davis1511
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Just Ride30 Rock Fellow Kids GIF by PeacockTV Giphy
"My wife really wanted a Peleton and Covid plus no gym memberships led us down that road."
"The workouts are good but holy f*ck, 90% of the instructors absolutely feel like they are trying to get you to join a cult or MLM scheme or something, they just have that vibe. They just ooze insincerity, as if everything they say is scripted and written by some corporate algorithm to appeal to millenials."
"Or they throw in some weird dumb sh*t that feels like they skimmed through a buzzfeed article and tried to talk about it during the workout and you end up spending three minutes listening to some weird recap of the article in the middle of your workout."
"They always come off as a "Hello, fellow kids/millenials" moment."
"There was one instructor talking about how they were "such an 80's/90's kid" and goes on about "Does anyone else remember that movie with David Bowie with the pants and it was all weird? That was my FAVORITE movie. I have no idea what it's called but I watch it all the time it's my favorite ever."
"This is an actual example. They were talking about the Labyrinth, but apparently couldn't remember the title or literally anything about the movie, but it was 'their favorite movie ever' and they still managed to talk for a few minutes about it for no reason." - attrm
Yesterday's WeatherDeserve Black Woman GIF by Janet Jackson Giphy
"True crime enthusiasts, especially the ones who pay to go to live tapings of 2 people talking about their daily lives, and then casually talking about victims innocently murdered like it was talking about yesterday's weather."
"I used to be addicted to true crime stuff, but slowly have moved on." - Catlover2727
"I love true crime a lot and find it really interesting! I'm even majoring in Criminology! HOWEVER My aunt was murdered, pretty famously, by a serial killer."
"There's pods casts and videos about her, and let me tell you... as someone who's FAMILY are the ones being talked about, some of these people are downright disrespectful. It's important to remember that these victims were people, with families that loved them.""
"There's a couple of podcasts and true crime channels that are actually really good and respectful, but not as many as there should be." - uwuursowarm
ElonCome On Wtf GIF by Saturday Night Live Giphy
"Tesla - how am I the first to add this?"
"Wait, maybe I've got this backwards though because they certainly do act cultish…" - Rockitrulz
"What do you mean, it's not a cult!"
"Elon Musk is going to revolutionize the world. Just ignore the lies, the government subsidies, his entrepreneurial history, and literally everything he says and does and things kind of look like they might be going okay!" - SeedersPhD
"These people literally want their currency to depend on what King Elon tweets." - the_leprechauns_anus
Employees Have Livesfalcon heavy rocket GIF by Product Hunt Giphy
"I turned down a job at Spacex making more money because every employee (6+) at Spacex I talked to told me they suggest working literally anywhere else and regret working there because of Elon musks insane mandatory work ethic."
"I work in software. 80 hours of work doesn't magically produce 80 hours of software. Everyone who isn't stupid as f*ck understands this. But yet that whole company pushes this mantra that you must work 80 hour weeks."
"Google does a cool 40 hours for most employees, and pretty much always did. My manager does "60" and much of it is availability for meetings with sitting on his @ss the rest of the time or gaming all day while he waits for his meetings."
"But somehow Spacex thinks that these billion dollar companies who treat their employees well and have a higher market cap are somehow dumb for letting people have lives" - MufugginChungus
"I interned there one summer and no joke, Elon sent a company-wide e-mail basically saying (in no uncertain terms) that 'if you're not working 80 hours a week, you're not working hard enough.'"
"All I needed to know that I never wanted a full-time position at that company." - Djent_Reznor1
TeachingCanadian Comedy GIF by CBC Giphy
"Public Education in the United States."
"Teachers are encouraged to work well beyond their contract hours for extremely limited pay, come in when they are sick even during a pandemic and then fed toxic positivity about how much better they are making kids lives." - Mudgeon
Two Party TroubleYou Lose Key And Peele GIF Giphy
"To me the Democratic and Republican parties take on a lot of the same aspects."
"Those two storylines seem largely fictional to me; that one serves the interest of business, opposed to large government, and the other the common good, for all people, and social equality."
"Both focus on the interests of the same people, the very wealthy."
"Both set up a strong us-versus-them context, a sense of belonging for members, adding extra dislike for an opposing side to what is the minimum required to sustain a cult, the attachment part."
"Both emphasize some degree of accepting larger purpose and project, but it's a scam, the same scam ran by both."
"The wealthiest .1% might think that the Republicans really are "their guys," since they push transfer of wealth to the already wealthy a little further, but the country decaying under them isn't of benefit to them either, in the not-so-long run."
"Billionaires play games that they are also really losing." - john-bkk
Commissionhappy episode 1 GIF Giphy
"Commission based insurance sales."
"Took a job at American Income Life, worked for 2 weeks basically shadowing. Each Thursday they had this bragging session at the beginning of the day."
"The senior I was following didn't earn a penny, wasted gas, food money, kept telling me how he was 'taking control of your own schedule and don't have to learn new things like those techy guys' and how it's so great."
"Now I'm a 'techy guy' earning 3 times more than him." - overpaidengineer
SportsBig Bang Theory Team GIF Giphy
"Cults are loosely defined as a group of people that are dedicated to a singular set of beliefs, purpose, and/or goals, and commonly have a common interest in a particular person or object."
"To that end, essentially every major sporting team is a cult."
"A bunch of cultists (players) who are passionately following their cult leader (coach) in a singular goal (winning their sports championship)."
"In many of the lower levels, like High School and College sports, you'll still see individual personalities and lack of unity. The High School player who enjoys the game, but doesn't take it seriously. The College player who honestly doesn't care if his team wins or loses, and it just trying to impress scouts as an individual so that he can go pro."
"But by the point you reach the top level, it's basically full-cult mode."
"This sportsball game will take over the player's life and dominate basically everything they do. The cult becomes their identity so much so that they frequently lose individuality and become simply a part of the team." - Goal-Express
DisneyHappy Snow White GIF by Disney Giphy
"I had an older co-worker who I hated working with. She would NOT stop talking about the last Disney trip, the next planned Disney trip, her daughter's obsession with Disney, her own obsession with Disney, movies, musicals, etc."
"It didn't end. Her phone case and all of her jewelry were all some mickey mouse variation. I just don't understand."
"Absolutely nothing is wrong with liking Disney, feeling nostalgic about it, visiting the parks, etc. However, this woman ONLY talked about Disney related things."
"People need some variation." - censorkip
The Rock Shopspencer pratt crystals GIF Giphy
"Crystals for 'healing' absolutely."
"Few years ago I found myself in a bit of a tourist trap rock shop. Now, I love me a good rock, always have, I don't judge when people pick up a random stone and are like 'oh man, this looks cool' I get it."
"So I'm snooping around, giving the side eye to this 7' tall amethyst geode trying to figure out if my girlfriend would notice me packing it in the trunk when this woman turns to her husband and says:"
" 'Oh! I think I need a few more crystals for my back, it's been hurting something fierce lately and I don't think the ones I have are cutting it anymore.' "
"Sure enough, woman buys a glob of quartz about the size of a normal human brain and walks out the door talking about how her back feels better already."
"Amazing." - Drix22
Now that you've read through, what "cultish" stuff is happening in your life?
No one wants war.
Who is going to light the powder keg and set it all off?
Which country will start WW3? Why?
Does anyone really want to start another world war?
They may not have a choice in the matter.
Getting It Out Of The Way Early
"Austrian here, we will do it again probably, I would like to say sorry in advance! Most plausible reason at the moment is because Germans eat schnitzel with sauce on top, then this conflict will spiral out again into WW3."
"Third time's the charm!"
-Some Austrian, probably
Civil War 2: Electric Boogaloo
"It'll be a civil war that devolves into a world war, with no one country clearly responsible for this change."
"But we'll blame it all on germany again, right"
Why I Oughtta...
"At this point, there are enough nukes in the world to ensure that a World War would simply result in nuclear annihilation on all sides. Say what you want about authoritarians like Xi Jinping, Kim Jung Un, and Ali Khameni, they are many things; but they're not suicidal. They know that an all out war would just end everyone, including them, so they're not going to. This is why the US and the USSR never went to all out war, despite coming close a few times; the risks were just too great for both sides."
"What could easily happen, however, is another cold war, this time between the US and China. And like in the Cold War, there could be proxy wars fought as a result of it, but it's unlikely that any country will take the insane risks of starting World War 3."
A full-blown world war is a tricky thing to get off the ground, that is if anyone wants it. The leading cause to impending war could come out of nowhere, or somewhere completely unexpected, or perhaps it will never come.
2-Day War Delivery
"Bruh its gunna be Amazon, not a country"
"Jeff Bezos finna be dropping Amazon basics nukes on us"
Can It Even Happen?
"I don't think the world can handle another world war. simply for the sake that we're all so interconnected. every major nation trades with each other and are in bed with each other. I would be a detriment to whatever country starts a war."
"Think about how the global supply chain has been impacted by the pandemic, the world would probably cease to function all together in a major conflict."
"There was a quote I liked, I think it was from Dan Carlin. He said that leading up to WWI Europe had become too economically entwined to go to war with itself, but none of the economists were invited to the war councils. The generals making the decisions didn't understand the situation so they made dumb decisions. The situation is undoubtably more-so interconnected today, the question is, do we have economists making the call on starting wars?"
A Little Humor Before We Get To The Serious Stuff...
"Probably America, I mean they made Wonder Woman 1 & 2, so highly likely they'd make WW3. At least start it. Not sure why someone else would finish it."
"No, they don't know how to count.. They jumped from WW1 to WW84."
Is it in the realm of possibility? Possibly.
After all, people will be people.
Anyone Else Surprised? No?
"America have a surplus of military might, a recent history of starting wars for profit, EVERYTHING is politicised and extreme nationalism and xenophobia are normalised within the populace. I'm going with them."
These All Feel Tangible
"My guesses would be 1) USA vs China over Taiwan or 2) China vs India (a lot on tension there that doesn't get a lot of news attention)"
"India-Pakistan and China-India are hot beds."
"India and Pakistan have been at war numerous times since their inception. 5 'official' wars and 9 minor skirmishes, to be exact. The last conflict ended with a ceasefire in 2003, but the last incident was a series of skirmishes along the Line of Control in Kashmir, from November 2020 to February 2021."
"Neither is capable of a full-fledged invasion of the other, so it's limited to border disputes. And while Pakistan does have nukes, it would be suicide to use them. There's no incentive for any other countries to get involved."
Going For It
"China making a move on Taiwan or some other land grab in India or other bordering countries."
An Infectious Idea
"India and Pakistan. It will spread to China, then North Korea (or North Korea first) and pull in many others in Asia. This will pull in NATO, either directly or via global partners (Australia)."
This One Makes WAY Too Much Sense
"Twitter. Someone will probably make a typo that everyone takes the wrong way..."
Well, what do you think could happen? Let us know in the comments.
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So let's talk about how a dog owner on Facebook learned her dog's "adorable" behavior was, in fact, furious masturbation.
Readers, if you know anything about me you know I love a good plot twist and I love chonky puppers.
Yesterday, life combined my two great loves in a hilarious and inappropriate way.
I was mindlessly scrolling through my dog groups on Facebook when a video with a few hundred laugh reacts but almost no comments caught my eye.
The still from the video was a pudgy little Frenchie, so obviously I had to read and watch.
The dogs owner shared the video along with a post asking professionals to shed some light on why he does what he does.
Owner-obliviousness as they gushed about how adorable it was made the awkward even better.
The owner explained the Frenchie often makes aggressive eye contact and licks his lips while he "plays air guitar"—which is what the family calls it—and how cute & funny they all find the behavior.
The video was the dog, casually chilling, using his paw to rub the tip of his penis while staring awkwardly at the camera and licking his lips like a pup possessed.
Three hundred and fifteen laugh-reacts—at the time that I saw it—and only three comments:
1. a vet explaining that the behavior showed in the video was the dog masturbating while making direct eye contact
2. the owner giving a simple "thank you" and
3. the admins of the group closing the comments.
So, why am I sharing this with you?
Because Reddit user Drakmamman asked:
"Dog owners of reddit, what the dog doin?"
... and so now you get this whole article just so I had an excuse to tell y'all about a furiously fapping Frenchie, 'cause somebody else needed to know about him.
I cackled for a good 20 minutes imagining the family getting all giddy about their dog "playing air guitar"—making the little air guitar meedly squeedly noises while he played, maybe even playing along thinking they're enjoying a fun little game—but they're really just been giving a hair metal soundtrack to their dogs stroke sesh.
Something tells me now the owner knows what "air guitar" really is, they're not likely to rush and tell Reddit all about how they've been gathering as a family to watch cause it's just so cute.
That's what I'm here for.
Anyway, here's the stuff other people's dogs are up to. It's not fapping—or if it is, the owners aren't telling Reddit.
"Wife just came home with the baby. Dog is acting like she's been abandoned for years running up and down, barking and jumping on everything."
"They'd only been out an hour and I was with her the whole time." - Single_Goose7015
"My dog does this too when my wife comes home. Like what am I, chopped liver?" - jackof47trades
"I feel your pain. My dog started howling mournfully when my partner went back to work last week… I was right there!" - TreatOutside
"Staring at the door waiting for the only human he cares about to come home (obviously not me)" - SnarkyRedhead
"Probably trying to herd the cats."
"He's a border collie mix who's afraid of goats and sheep, but even after six years of living with them he still thinks he can control where the cats go."
"He's a good boy, he's very persistent, but not terribly bright sometimes." - TokesNotHigh
"After 8 years our border collie still herds the cats, and the vacuum." - psychologicaluse28
"Big heart, small brain. I have one of those dogs too. They are the sweetest." - Technobucket
"She has flung herself flat across the bed and is playing dead, quiet except for the occasional pitiful whine. Every now and then she lifts her head up and fixes a desperate look upon me, silently begging for release from her wretched existence."
"She's a bit overdramatic about having to wear a cone. The issue is an abrasion on a toe that she won't stop licking, which is making it worse."
"I've been alternating between bandaging it and having her wear a cone. She's been consistently a drama queen." - halfinboxes
"Staring at me because their dinner time is in one hour and they need to start letting me know that, in an hour, they need to eat...in an hour, so I better not forget...cuz they're hungry, which is why they're staring at me...and it's almost dinner time."
"Just one more hour, And they want to make sure I don't forget. Because maybe I will."
"So, they need to remind me. By staring at me. Every day. One hour before dinner." - MotherOfFred
A Little "Light" ExerciseGiphy
"Mine loves light reflected off watches or phones. And loves lasers."
"It's sunny and he sees light on the wall so he is bothering me to use my watch or phone so he can chase the light. I've spent the last hour doing it."
"I even got him a cat laser toy that's automatic for him and he runs himself tired as all hell with it. But he is STILL asking for it."
"Used the laser toy also too, so he is panting dripping tongue and still wants to play more..." - boomgoon
"Last night my dogs chased down and killed a rabbit in the backyard. They are usually so gentle; this was weird and unexpected."
"I watched the whole thing helpless because it was so fast. The rabbit screamed, it was insane."
"Now, I'm watching them sleep on my couch and can't help but think they just murdered someone."
"They are just vicious predators, right here, in my house. On my couch."
"But they snuggly as f*ck. This trips me out." - Atheist_Redditor
A Problematic PrincessGiphy
"We have two chihuahuas. One is a 15 year old (quite appropriately) named Princess and one is a one year old named Charlie."
"Both have their own dog beds on the couch since they are spoiled."
"When Princess is feeling particularly moody or like asserting her dominance, she will drag Charlie's bed into her bed and lay on top of BOTH of them and snarl at him if he comes close to her personal space bubble/bed mountain."
"And when we tell her she can't have both beds and put his bed back to the side, she just glares at us. Lol." - mslm90
"She's currently in her cage resting after her great adventure."
"She managed to get upstairs and grab a hold of one of my shoes. Not just any old shoe, but one of the shoes I am planning to wear this weekend for my wedding."
"After running around, she dropped the shoe to chew on a shirt - at which point she was cornered, and then brought downstairs."
"Pup and shoe are both unharmed and doing well. My nerves, not so much." - still_interesting23
So ... what's YOUR dog been up to lately?
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Have you ever fantasized about what it would be like to win the lottery? Having money for the rest of your life, as far as the eye can see, to cover your expenses.
And have you thought about all the things you would buy if you could really afford them? Are they ALL practical things, or are some of them silly?
We always love to fantasize about what life would be like if money were no object. And you are not alone!
Redditor OnlyVillager asked:
"If you won the lottery, what's something 'useless' that you would buy?"
Here were some of those answers.
I Be The Witch Of The Wood
"My teenage daughter disclosed to me the other day that her biggest life goal is to buy a house on an acreage that has a large wooded area."
"She plans to build me a house in the woods, fund whatever ridiculous bullsh*t art installations I want to erect in the woods, then spread rumors in neighboring towns that a witch lives back there."
"She's the best."-OpossumJesusHasRisen
My Kingdom For A Castle
"I'm blowing it all on a castle. No, not one of those fairy tale mansions from the 19th century robber barons called 'castles'.
"A fully loaded, honest-to-god, obsolete, medieval fortress. Two curtain walls, a keep, towers, barbican, portcullis, murderholes, loopholes, machicolations, the works. It'll be a well warmed summer retreat/place to hide out if another plague hits the world."
"I'm buying Au Train island in the Upper Peninsula to be specific. When the feds finally come after billionaires to pay their fair share, I'm running to my island and sealing the gates behind me."
"So I can get my affairs in order and pay my taxes. What were you thinking I was gonna do? Hide from the IRS? They can breach any castle lmao."-DaemonTheRoguePrince
I Wanna Be A Billionaire
- "I want a cold water dispenser on my desk. It has to be connected to the water line, filtered and cooled. Ideally it also has that thing that automatically knows when the container is almost full."
- "My new lifestyle would be to live 4 weeks in a different city, then 1 week at home. In each city, I would stay in a Luxury Airbnb or a five star hotel."
- "I would hire a professional soccer coach. I'm talking someone that trains pro players. I'm Arab and I'm tired of not being good at soccer, just a few months of lessons and I'll be able to participate in pick up games and have fun."
- "I would also hire singing, guitar and piano instructors. Singing would be the toughest because my voice sucks, but I figure with time I can be good enough to sing a song if I want to reference it. That's how bad I am today."-Reformedjerk
Imagine just not having to think when you click the "purchase" button.
A Nice Siesta
"Maybe not exactly "useless" in the way people are thinking (the way the question is asked makes me think by "useless" they mean "stupid/wasteful" but I'm thinking in terms of things that are fun and only for the purpose of having fun), but do vacations count?"
"If I had that much money all to myself, I would 100% rather have a regular sized house/car and spend the money on experiences instead."
"The idea of having a normal life but knowing that I can just decide to take the day off and go to DisneyLand or treat myself to a fancy dinner whenever the hell I want to is a fantasy I've had since I was literally a little kid."
"I get that those aren't useful things because they're not things I could USE like a car/house/purse/etc, but I'd definitely be happy:)"-StreetIndependence62
"Well this stuff is only useless if there isn't some sort of apocalyptic event that happens in my lifetime."
"That said, I'd go full prepper and bury myself a bunker in the desert with tons of food and water stored away and decked out with solar panels, a garage full of electric cars, and a stash of every sort of modern electronic equipment available in vast quantities."
"So this would be a huge waste of money if there's never an apocalypse. But it would be very valuable to me if there happens to be one."-TimHawks1983
"I have always wanted a talking toilet. I don't even know why at this point. I just saw it on a tv show, don't even remember what, and since that day I have thought 'yes, I want this.'"
"But right now, with my paupers wage, I cannot afford such a thing. I have a lot of serious plans for lottery level money. I would open a shelter for homeless people and start my own dog shelter. As well as my own theme park."
"But I would still get a talking toilet."-MagnificentColossus
Put Your Bird On My Shoulder
"I would get into falconry, vintage guitars from the 50s and 60s, a live in Cook, most of the surfaces that I touch would be marble, and I would save a significant portion of my money to split between investments and gambling on riskier stocks."
"Depending on how much money a private jet would be in the cards as well as a flight license. This is one of my favorite things to daydream about"-freemason777
The best part of all of this is, it doesn't matter that these things are useless.
They bring us joy, and that is what matters.
"Boring" "Flame Thrower"???
"Definitely a boring company flame thrower. And a Barrett M82."
"Probably a supercar too, but not to drive it. I want to light it on fire in a public space as an appeal to consumerism right before I go take a private jet to Nappa Valley to eat at the French Laundry and get hammered on the most expensive bottles of wine I can find."-xdylanxfrommyspace
"There are many things I bought that I regretted it immediately. I love to try new stuff. Especially no-brand or brand that is not famous. My curiosity is very high, that is the problem."
"I wanted to know whether those products are okay for human being. For example, I bought BioAqua face products. The most product I regret is BioAqua aloe vera. After my third use of the product, I actually experience worst allergic in the world."
"My skin had a lot of red patches appeared in just few hours. It was itchy but not painful. Just I keep scratching my skin but I tried my best to control it."
"It took about three - five days to keep it clear with medication and creams. Then after a couple of weeks, I decided to use it again. I got the reaction."
"Thankfully, I still have the medication and the cream. So, I took it immediately. I also did not apply the cream that much compared to previous time."
"I still have the aloe vera bottle in my room. I wanted to throw it but I could not throw it. Yet, I cannot use it and yes, I feel sad when I saw it. So, you can understand how I feel."-nimbledealing53
Hobby Hobby Hobby!
"If I won the lottery - I would open a shop for my favorite hobby. I would manage it like a business, giving a decent wage to several workers allowing them to pursue a degree or whatever and have a job that doesn't suck."
"I'd lose money on running a store. But I'd enjoy it. I'd enjoy sharing my hobby, selling the stuff I love at reasonable prices and giving a few young people a good job in a stress free environment."
"Useless store, great life experience for the people I'd employ."-Dealthagar
Money doesn't solve all of the world's problems or all of a person's problems, even—but it certainly does make life a little easier here and there for those who need it.
Hopefully the 21st century sees all of us buying things with our millions of dollars.
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One of the most freeing realizations I've had was when I understood that not everyone was going to like me.
That's just the way it is for all of us, and I learned that it would be unfair for me to dedicate so much time worrying about what others might think.
It changed my life—improved it, I'd say.
That, combined with my willingness to take responsibility for my own actions, was crucial to my self-development.
Whether it's an epiphany or experience, there are many things that can happen and can successfully shift your perspective.
People shared their stories after Redditor drewyourstory asked the online community:
"What life event or experience changed your perspective?"
"From this, I learned..."
"Nearly died of a post-surgical hypoxic brain injury, followed by a variety of problems subsequently."
"From this, I learned that mortality is a fragile thing in a random, amoral universe."
It truly is. We really have no say in it either.
We really do not have control.
"Once you get your own place..."
"Once you finally get your own place, you appreciate and feel gratitude for things that you used to take for granted."
"It's helped me maintain..."
"My husband died after a sudden short illness. My life is divided by that point in time."
"There is before and after, I'm a different person now nearly 12 years later but I'm okay with that. It's helped me maintain a good perspective dealing with my current partner's stroke."
"He's doing ok but will never have the mobility he once had. Just taking one day at a time."
Sorry for your loss.
Silver linings exist... even in tragedy.
"I can put up with..."
"My spouse developed a chronic pain illness. She spent months in debilitating pain and there wasn't a goddamn thing I could do to help."
"When we finally got a diagnosis, she was able to start on some medications that improved her quality of life to near where it had been."
"Suddenly little problems just didn't seem important anymore. I can put up with a whole hell of a lot more than I ever thought possible because at least my partner's not in burning pain constantly anymore."
Thankfully, your partner is healthier, and the experience undoubtedly made you a stronger person!
"I had both hips replaced..."
"I had both hips replaced at 25 and will owe money for the rest of my life."
"My debt to income ratio keeps me from normal things like owning a house. I don't sweat missing a bill now and then anymore."
Society really should not allow this to happen.
"I think every single human..."
"I think every single human has experienced the feeling of post-traumatic guilt caused by something they've done in the past."
"For example, in elementary school, I had a best friend whose family was struggling financially. One day, he brings coins (pennies and nickels only) for his school lunch that day."
"I, for some stupid reason, smacked the change out of his hand as he took the change out to count how much he had."
"I got yelled at by the principal, who was walking behind me, and got suspended. Ever since that day, I have never ever made fun of someone's financial stability, given people money (especially the homeless), and never smacked anything out of anyone's hands."
"That moment changed my perspective on how the treatment towards others comes back to bite you."
"Holding my eight year old brother as he died from extreme medical incompetence then being stuck with his body for twenty minutes as a ventilator made his corpse breathe and a fault in the heart monitor didn't trigger the alarm to bring help and the nurses ignored the call light because they were 'busy with another patient'."
"I cared about people before then. I can switch that off and on at will now."
"Being from Canada..."
"Being from Canada, we're pretty sheltered here, so traveling to other parts of the world and seeing how poor some communities are really made me realize how lucky we are and how good we have it."
Many people in the Western world would learn a hell of a lot if they were humbled by the way others around the world live.
"I love him..."
"Having a child with autism. He is the most loving, kind, intelligent young man."
"I love him more than anything in the world, but I have to consider everyday events that others take for granted. There are things that will be overly stressful for him, and without any glaring differences, people are often not understanding."
"Family gatherings, grocery store visits, haircuts, the dentist, everything is planned."
"The world can be a noisy, chaotic, inconsistent place which are all things he really hates, but he meets every challenge head-on and I couldn't be prouder to call him my son."
"Have you ever just stood..."
"Have you ever just stood and looked at a dead person? The first dead person I ever saw was my father... I've seen probably more than my share after that too."
"Looking at someone with their lights permanently turned off changes something in you."
No one is immune from life's tragedies or trials and tribulations.
How do you handle them, though? That's the real test.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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