Frustrated People Share Their Neighbor Horror Stories
When you buy your home, you expect a certain level of politeness and consideration from your neighbors. Keep your dogs off each others lawns. Let them know about any loud parties going on. Trim your hedges and keep your sports equipment off their roofs. Simple, right? Not for some, apparently, as evidence by these frustrated homeowners answers to Reddit user, u/narwhal_attack2394, who asked: What did your a--hole neighbor do?
I moved onto a dirt road with several houses on it. My friend has lived down the road his whole life. The people next to my house only come up for the summer and are never there in the winter. When summer comes, however, there's multiple pot holes on the road. Curious, I asked my friend. He said the neighbors come up in the summer and dig the holes themselves in order to 'slow down' traffic.
Picking A Fight With The Wrong Senior Citizen
Picked a fight with our 70 year old Indian neighbor. Like, an actual physical fight.
Indian neighbor has seen waaay too much BS in his life to tolerate any more and hit him with a nectarine tree in a pot.
EDIT: yes the tree is ok. Hilariously, he actually gifted it to me last weekend after I helped him do a bunch of trellis work (we're both keen food gardeners). I haven't been able to look at it without cracking up.
Being TOO Nosey
He used to stand on the footpath drunk every afternoon and yell to my husband about what a b**** I was. Once my husband told him to go home and he shaped up to try and punch my husband, who was around 50 years younger than the neighbor.
My infraction? He rang one day to be nosy check why my husband's car was home on a work day. I politely thanked him for his call and let him know my husband was sleeping and had a cold, nothing to worry about.
Apparently I was meant to praise him profusely for being such a caring neighbour, and my husband was meant to follow up with a call once he was awake and also lavish him with praise for caring. Because we didn't, we got to hear about it loudly every afternoon until we moved several months later.
Calling Out Your Kids
Called the cops on our then 6 yr old son because he was playing outdoors in public property.
It wasn't a road or anything. There was no danger whatsoever. He wasn't screaming or anything, she just didn't like kids.
She also told our 3 yr old daughter that she was ugly.
Water On Concrete
Late last year mine said he'll bash me because I got his driveway wet while I had the sprinkler going to water my yard. Not even joking - he flipped his s*** over his driveway getting water on it!
Yelled at me for entering a shared garage to get some of our stuff. He later claimed I was after his gun, which was stored in a gun locker with a lock, that only he had the key for. He was in his 60's or 70's at the time.
Jerry Sounds Like The Literal Worst
When I moved in, he seemed eccentric, but harmless. Apparently my landlord had a conversation with him and told him to leave me alone. This upset Jerry greatly. He cornered me one day while I was unlocking my door and asked me to come sit with him in his apartment. I don't think the place had ever been cleaned and he had Hoarder mentalities. He drank a bottle of wine in about 30 minutes, commenting on all the sad things in his life. Luckily he passed out, so I could leave.
A couple weeks later, he got into a 3am fight with his boyfriend, which resulted in his boyfriend trying to get into my apartment for safety, and eventually breaking into an empty unit down the hall. Cops were called and Jerry was taken to jail.
About a week after that, same boyfriend was over and a fight ensued. This time it ended in very loud sex.
Jerry would flush things you're not supposed to flush down the toilet and would back up sewage into mine and my neighbor's bathtubs and bathroom sinks. Eventually he clogged his toilet so badly that he just ripped it from the wall and left it there.
The cops came twice to my door to ask if I had seen Jerry lately, and asked to search my apartment to make sure I wasn't hiding him.
One day while I was getting ready for work, he came into my apartment with another guy and tried to measure my walls for the "renovation" he was going to do to combine his and my apartments into one unit. But, don't worry, I could just live with him when it was all finished.
Eventually, Jerry got evicted, but would still convince people to let him into the building. For months his mugshot was pasted on all entrances saying to not let him in.
Misusing Your Authority
Got his cop buddies to come put stickers on our cars claiming they were illegally parked so we had to move them so he would have room for his guests to park.
I bought a corner lot in a newer subdivision so i have curb and sidewalk on two sides of my property. The side of my house has plenty of room for parking which i sometimes use, my stepson uses, and sometimes the other neighbors I like use. New neighbor bought a house on the other side of the street from my side, and doesn't have a lot of street parking for his lot. He claims that the parking on my side of the road is his because it is across the street from his house.
When confronted about the fact that it is just parking and no way belongs to him, me or anybody he told us he knows people in the police department that can take care of this. He also picked this time to scream pretty specific mean things about all his new neighbors and how each one was s**** like he is watching us.
I Need To Sleep, Jerry!
Rang my doorbell at 4am over and over and asked me to go with him because there was an emergency and it was important. Went with him and he took me over to his car and started asking what I thought of it and looked very proud.
In other words this dude rang every apartment in the building at 4am to get people to look at his new car.
When They Do ALL The Things Wrong
Ahhhhhhh! Please allow me to vent because I am in the throes of this b.s. at the moment.
First, they have 4 mini-Dachsunds that never shut up. I cannot even open my backdoor without these little dogs going off, and they just leave their dogs outside all day. I enjoy sitting outside on a nice day and reading, but nope, I can't concentrate over the ear-splitting constant yapping. Now, I am a dog person, I own dogs and love dogs, but this complete lack of consideration is mind-boggling.
Second, they rent (and I own), but the crazy wife told me she owns a 3' strip of my property and they'll be moving the fence over. I don't have a huge yard, 3' is a lot of space, and did I mention THEY RENT. I brought out my survey to say "No, you don't own it and no, you aren't going to be moving the fence," and she continued to say that they had their own survey but refused to show it to me.
Third, they seem to think it's no big deal if they come into my yard. I came home from work to find they'd moved their water drainage into my backyard.
They complain about my tree and asked me to cut it down. I said no. They put their garbage cans in my driveway. I've witnessed the wife empty her vacuum cleaner in my driveway. She has blown piles of leaves that haven't even come from my tree into my driveway. Even after I put locks on my gate, she climbed up on a ladder, LEANED OVER THE FENCE, and leaf blew all the leaves IN MY YARD AND THAT WERE ALREADY IN PILES all over my yard. After that, I put up cameras and have future plans to press charges for trespassing the next time this crazy b-tch pulls another stunt...
Cats Are People Too, Darn It
Moved in with 2 cats. Decided she would rather have a dog. Took the 2 cats, set them on her porch, and made them "outdoor cats". Stopped feeding them. Didn't spay either. Now our neigbhorhood is overrun with 10 or so male cats and these 2 have a new litter each every few months.
A--holes. Animals aren't a decoration you can just throw out when you're bored with them. They are living creatures, damnit.
Early Morning Shots
One of them was a cowboy builder who even conned his elderly nextdoor neighbours into getting their roof done for £10,000 even though their tiles were almost brand new, he then took all their tiles to re-tile his roof for free and put about 10% of his old crappy tiles on their roof then abandoned the project completely, don't worry though we got him arrested and he had to sell his house to pay back his victims although the cost of his house didn't even come close to covering the full costs
another neighbour would stand in his back garden really early in the morning then start shooting local birds with a crossbow when they woke up and he put the bodies in regular bin bags and left them in the street where foxes ripped them open and dragged dead birds all over the place, now we have no songbirds in the area
Sicking Her Son On You
Not one of her neighbors can stand her, she's pissed off everyone on all sides of her.
Her son's a cop so she'll send him over to b**** at you if you violate any of her peeves. She did that about one of the dogs, (she hates animals) and my wife answered the door. Her poor kid got an earful and told to go home before she called his captain to complain about the momma's boy that lives next door harassing people. Hilarious.
She regularly gets into it with her neighbor on the other side, which is a mistake, since that woman is taking care of a dementia suffering husband and puts up with zero BS. I can hear her regularly telling her to get bent.
- Screamed obscenities through the wall at my children because they were "talking too loudly" in the middle of the day.
- Screamed at us through the walls in the middle of the night so we could "see how it felt to be disturbed."
- Regularly dumped his old food out of his bathroom window into our shared backyard. Rodent infestation took place shortly thereafter.
- Stopped paying rent to our landlord because he felt that the landlord should have warned him that he might be able to hear his neighbors.
- Dumped his trash on our shared front porch.
Landlord did not renew his lease. Took him to court, got his unpaid rent money back plus additional payment for damages to the apartment. It was a glorious vindication.
Worst Dinner Guest Ever
On a near daily basis, he throws temper tantrums, yelling, stomping, throwing tools, slamming doors and screaming at his family over some petty nonsense.
I feel bad for is family and I'm genuinely annoyed each time I hear his voice.
It started by letting her kids and animals run wild in my back yard. So, I dropped $5k on a 6' privacy fence that my father-in-law and I built. Then she had her water turned off for lack of payment and began pooping in plastic bags and throwing them over my fence. When confronted about it, she kindly denied and then took to social media.
I called the landlord and had an eviction notice served the next day.
Offer Unsolicted Gardening Advice
Ripped up and threw away my mum's sweet pea plant that she got from her friend who died of cancer.
When she complained he started ranting about how our garden is a disgrace and an embarrassment to the neighborhood and we need to replace all the grass and plants with concrete.
It's A Neighborhood, Not A Club
He would blast EDM music almost every day starting from 9 AM, especially on the weekends, and once I asked him to please keep it down until 10 AM he changed his habit.. to 8:30 AM.
When I was 10, my neighbor -- an 80-something year old man with a Christian radio station -- shot and killed one of my dogs. When I went looking for my dog, I asked my neighbor if he had seen him.
He told me that he shot a dog like that this morning.
Frozen, I asked where he was so I could bury him. The old man told me that his body was in the dumpster and that he would shoot me too if I didn't get off his land.
I ran through the woods back to my house, screaming out loud in anger and punching trees until my knuckles were torn and bloody.
When I got home, I called the police and the K9 unit came out to my house. He retrieved my dog's body and I buried him.
The worst part was that my dog was very sweet (I know that generally sweet dogs can be threatening, but it was very against his nature) my neighbor had tied him up and broken all of his legs.
I have never felt more rage in my life. My mom took the man to court and he was charged with animal cruelty and the judge asked how much money I thought the dog was worth. I was dumbfounded and croaked out that I didn't want money -- I wanted my dog.
The neighbor was fined $500 and I made him pay it to the local humane society.
The man had the ten commandments posted all around his house, so the next night I took a red sharpie and circled "Thou Shalt Not Kill" on all of his signs.
I doubt anyone will see this comment, but damn... writing it was kind of therapeutic. My dog's name was Hershey, he was a mutt that was born in my bedroom -- he was only 2 years old and such a good boy. Thanks Reddit.
Ignoring The Ones You're Supposed To Not
Neglected their daughter to the point that she'd sneak into our house and steal food from our kitchen.
CPS was called.
When I was a teenager and lived with my parents we had this one neighbor family that seemed sorta off. One day the father knocks on our door and tells my parents they haven't had power for a long time and begged to run an extention cord to one of our outside outlets for the day so his young kids could have cold milk with their cereal in the morning.
My parents agreed to do this for one day. The neighbor kept up their part and disconnected the cable after that day. A week later they hook it back up again without us noticing. A month goes by and our electricity bill is basically double what it normally is. Parents head to the backyard and find the cable plugged in, yank it out, and confront the neighbor.
At first the father doesn't show his whole body and cracks the door, but my stepdad gets him to open up the door after pointing out that he is concealing a gun (he didn't have to pull the gun out). Stepdad demands and explanation as to why the cable was run to our outlet and the dude just sorta mumbles incoherently and shuts the door, locking it.
Bad neighbor family was in a duplex and their neighbor, sharing the building, comes around and asks what's up. Parents explain the whole story and how the next step was calling the police. Good neighbor is a former police chief and is friends with the entire force, he offers to make the call.
Several cop cars arrive. Bad neighbor father and mother are arrested. Turns out they were running a meth lab inside the house. The mother was a prostitute and the kids (a boy and girl between ages 7-10) were malnourished. The kids were put into foster care.
No other bad neighbor has beat that high score yet.
Before there was Seth Rogen and Zac Efron duking it out on the block, it was John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd in 1981's Neighbors, available here in retro packaging designed to make your blu-ray look like a VHS tape.
If Rogen and Efron are more your style, you can get 2014's Neighbors here.
Foreigners Describe The Most Disrespectful Thing They've Seen An American Tourist Do In Their Country
Why are Americans so stubborn in our behaviors when we travel? Would you go into a stranger's home and just put your feet up on the coffee table? Apparently the answer for many of you is yes.
When I am preparing for foreign travel I do a ton of research first. I want to make sure I know as much as I can, as to have the safest and most enjoyable experience possible. I also want to understand customs and the culture as to not be rude or leave a lasting bad impression.
And from the sounds of it, I'm an American minority on this topic.
Redditor u/Bugginette wanted Americans to listen up so that the next time we travel, we leave a better impression. So they inquired:
Non Americans of Reddit, what is the weirdest thing you have seen an American tourist do that would be considered very disrespectful/inappropriate in your country?
The only time I really caused a scene while traveling was when I was with a theatre troupe. We went to Amsterdam to tour a show. And let's just say we might have "indulged" in some cannabis, and run amok in the towns square for a bit. You could feel the disdain from the locals. Sorry, y'all. We'll do better next time.
Thieves...Jurassic Park Dinosaur GIF by VidiotsGiphy
"When I was in France a couple of American tourists tried to sneak out of the Paris Catacombs with a bone they had stolen."
"Not buy their round. In a pub in Ireland. When the pub round system had been explained to them. And they had happily taken drinks from everyone. And when it was their round, and everyone had empty glasses and it was mentioned that "Think it's your round..." and they responded " I think I'm good now thanks" Mortified for bringing them with me!! (and yes I bought the round for everyone else on their behalf.)"
"I'm an American but I was visiting England and touring the Tower of London. There was a cannon behind a rope with a "Do not touch or climb" sign. This American woman lifted the rope and told her kid (maybe 7 years old) to go sit on the cannon so she could take a picture. The KID protested and said the sign said no... The woman said she didn't care, and ordered her kid to do it or she'd ground them."
Hush up Karen!!Karen GIF by moodmanGiphy
"I overheard the guy standing in front of me in the queue at mc D's having a meltdown:"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T ACCEPT AMERICAN DOLLARS. THIS IS A MCDONALD'S!!!" This was in Poland, Europe."
U Crazy Girl!
"An American exchange student who complained to me in anger that book stores in Germany have so many books in German. I mean, it's not unusual here for every book store to even have a small section of books in other languages including English so it's not like she never got to buy a book here she could read."
How do you not research the currency? It's literally the FIRST thing you should be doing. For the love of God. There really should be a bad behavior travel ban list. It's not that arduous a task to not act like a fool. Oof.
Take It!Megan Mullally Lol GIF by Will & GraceGiphy
"I was in Rome and a lady was confused why the confectionery stand man wouldn't take her dollars."
"I was working a bar in Scotland. There was a woman one night with her daughter and she refused to pay with anything other than American cash. It was a super uncomfortable situation, me trying to explain how stupid it all was, her daughter (who I think was living in Scotland) was trying to calm her down and trying to pay but the mother kept pulling the her hand away from the card machine saying "you people love our money, our money is more important than yours."
"She kicked on for a solid 5 to 10 minutes, her daughter ended up paying and leaving. Then she had a go at me for embarrassing her daughter and she even left a review on trip advisor explaining the situation, she explained it perfectly literally wrote herself as the bag guy in the review. Freaking mind boggling how delusional this bird was."
"Haven't you planned your trip?"
"Probably only weird but when on a flight back to the UK from the US, the American lady sat next to me, started asking questions about England about 40 minutes before landing and not just like any "local recommendations" but really basic stuff like what currency do we use. It seemed like she had got on the plane knowing absolutely nothing about the UK, which blew my mind."
"Not just from a "haven't you planned your trip?" POV but having the confidence to do that. She seemed to think it was a small place and everything she wanted to see would be in front of her hotel. She was very polite and lovely about it in a naive way though."
To what end lady?
"In Canada some stores will accept American cash as payment, but by law have to still give Canadian change. I worked in a city that got a lot of American tourists, and it was crazy how often someone would get really frustrated with us for not giving them American change. I had someone even accuse me of lying about it being the law. To what end lady?"
"It's been pointed out that this may not actually be a law, it may just be the rules at the store or some accounting thing. It's been like ten years so the details are fuzzy."
Moron!!Unimpressed Loop GIFGiphy
"In Australia, shook a koala out of a tree at a wildlife park."
American Karens are just running a global mess. I mean who thinks this is decent, human behavior? Y'all need some serious discipline. And Americans are the first ones to point out bad behavior of visitors here. Help it make sense Lord.
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Everyone has a bucket list, even if we haven't written it down. We all have a few ideas in the back of our minds about the things we want to do or see before it's lights out on life.
That's why the Make-A-Wish foundation is so special. They are often able to gift children extraordinary life highlights in the midst of tragedy and sorrow.
And every once in a while some of those requests are a bit surprising and off the wall. Hey, to each their own. Who knows why any of us love the things we love.
Redditor u/The_King123431 wanted to hear all about the wishes that have made people go... "Hmmmm!" By asking:
Make a wish employees, what was the strangest wish a kid asked for and actually received?
If tragedy had struck me at 5, I know I would've asked to meet ALF. I thought he was real...and Kermit & Piggy. Like I would've loved a tea and ice cream party with them. Actually... I would still ask for that now.
MulanChina Oops GIFGiphy
"I had cancer when I was very young and I was able to get a Make-A-Wish. Without hesitation, I said I wished I could eat Butterfingers with Mulan."
"It was my favorite candy and my favorite Disney character at the time so it made sense to me. But they didn't really know what to do, so they just sent me off to Disney World lol. Every time I go to Disney, I always bring Butterfingers with me & I always try to find Mulan in hopes my wish can come true. Maybe one day!"
"Ayo. Wish higher."
"I shot an internal promotional video for Make a Wish once. I got to read through a big book of wishes they had granted. Some of them were so extravagant and amazing. Family vacations, celebrity meetings. And then I saw a 3 year old who wished for a banana split for breakfast. And that's what they gave him. No one was like "Ayo. Wish higher."
"I helped host a visit to a planetarium by a kid whose wish was to go to the moon. The front office folks thought I could just give her a personal tour of the planetarium and show her some nice high-resolution visuals, but I thought she deserved better than that. I commissioned a jeweler friend and meteorite enthusiast to make a silver crescent moon necklace, which he graciously donated to the cause, and I donated a small lunar meteorite from my own collection."
"It was a gorgeous necklace very much to the credit of my friend's artistry and generosity. We couldn't take her to the moon so we gave it to her instead. She was thrilled, but later said her real highlight of the trip was the astronaut ice cream. Ah, kids."
A Few Ideas...
- "To be a "merman" (a boy mermaid). He got a tail and swam in the giant tank with other mermaids at the aquarium.
- To play football with "the red team" (no pro or college preference - just had to be red). USC made it happen."
"3) To be a "cool kid": Got a limo ride to the mall.. red carpet entrance with cheering fans, signed autographs, shopping spree for clothes. 5 years old- So cute- and very "cool."
"4) To be Robin (not Batman... he said he wasn't ready for that). Went on an epic adventure fighting crime with Batman."
Thanks VlasicBig Deal Sunglasses GIF by Dietz & WatsonGiphy
"There was a Make-a-Wish kid in a class I taught once and their wish was to tour a pickle factory. Pickles were their all time favorite food and they wanted to see how the sausage was made so to speak. Apparently Vlasic rose to the occasion in a major way and she had the time of her life."
Now I want a pickle and I think I need to rewatch "Mulan." At 12, I def would've asked to meet Madonna. No, I would've asked to go on tour with Madonna. And I would've wanted an endless supply of Fun-Dip. Remember that?
2 of a Kindbaby delivering GIFGiphy
"I know someone who was granted a wish. Of all things they could choose, they asked for 2 tiny birds, 2 budgies."
What up LEGO??
"I worked at a LEGO retail store in the 2000s and Make-A-Wish approached us for a child with terminal Osteosarcoma who wanted to be in the store for a day. LEGO unfortunately denied the request (which surprised myself and the rest of the staff because LEGO was a pretty great company)."
"Staff decided to honor the request ourselves. We closed the store early on a Sunday, then invited the kid and family in. He had a full run of the store, we collectively paid for like $1000 worth of toys for him to take home, and just spent the entire evening building w/e he wanted. He died a few months later 😭."
"In wizard 101 there's a quest with an NPC named Brandon, named after a make a wish kid who played the game, and his request was to design a side quest for the game. You meet Brandon and go help him clear out this dungeon with 2 really freaking hard bosses, was a lotta fun. At the end you get a gem you can socket that lets you summon Brandon into battle as a follower, pretty cool. Not sure what ended up happening to Brandon, but it's really cool that thousands of ppl have gotten to enjoy being a part of his wish tbh."
The Doc is In...
"I was approached by a similar organization who wanted to arrange a day for a kid to shadow a veterinarian. I'm just a small animal veterinarian with a small hospital so I found it odd that I'd be approached. I said yes (who tf would say no?) and we picked a day and had our regular patients in the hospital and the kid got to watch us do our thing for a day."
"We gave him a lab coat and a stethoscope and let him tag along and see x rays and ultrasounds and watch surgeries. I brought my dog in so he could try the ultrasound on her. He seemed to enjoy it. It wasn't a terribly strange request really, it just seems like my day-to-day isn't something anyone would consider their dream experience."
FORE!!golf swinging GIFGiphy
"My cousin was a Make a Wish kid. He loved golf, like had a scholarship to go play college, he loved it so much. He got to meet and play a round of golf with Payne Stewart. Unfortunately, he died not too long after that. I hate you cancer!"
I love these stories when I hear them. They make me believe in humanity, briefly. At my current age... I'd still want to meet ALF and Madonna but also, bourbon and tea with Adele. And you?
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Cities. Those things we live in.
What city would you never, ever, EVER live in?
These places, while inhabited by a good number of people, aren't exactly the kind of spots you would want to go back to on a repeat visit.
Transformed Into Something Unsettling
"For me, it's Mecca. It's beautiful, but it's just not for an openly gay Western dude like me."
"Same with Tehran."
"Im surprised you think Mecca is beautiful lol. I, along with almost every Muslim I know, hates what has happened to that place. The skyscrapers are extremely ugly (especially that goddam clock tower) and overshadow the beauty of the mosque. Almost all historical sites are gone except for the Kabah. I know they need infrastructure to handle all the people but they did it in the worst way possible."
"Mecca like almost every other Arabian city has turned into places for rich Saudis to show their wealth and almost nothing else."
"Irvington, NJ - My friend told me to run through every red light and not stop at any cost after I dropped her off at her apartment. Her wise words phased me as I stopped at the first red light. 3 seconds later a huge motherf-cker with a crowbar starts heading in my direction. 3 red lights all while screaming toward McCarter Highway."
"The following week my car was stolen while I was attending classes in Newark and they used my car to rob a liquor store in Irvington, NJ. Literally only owned my car for 2 weeks."
"F-ck Irvington, NJ."
The Literal Fast And The Furious
"Cairo, Egypt. 19 million people, 23 million cars, no stoplights. On a 3 lane road, you have 5 lanes of traffic, left shoulder, straddling first white line, middle lane, straddling 2nd white line, and right shoulder! When we visited, our tour guide told us we needed 3 things to drive there…"good brakes, good horns & good nerves!"
Cars are bumper to bumper, and then people are crossing the street in between the cars, walking, in wheelchairs, pushing baby strollers! Then along beside our bus, comes someone riding a donkey! Crazy. Soldiers with machine guns on the street corners, we even had an armed guard on our tour bus."
Then there are some cities, some you might never have visited, which have generated enough discussion and gotten enough publicity to be actively awful in your mind. You don't have to have gone there to know you never want to be there.
A Place To Skip Completely
"Mumbai. Even if I was financially secure, I couldn't stand seeing all the poverty and squalor all the time. It would weigh on me."
"A friend of a friend spent six months riding his motorcycle from London to Chennai. He recorded everything in his journal in excruciating detail except for Mumbai. There was only one sentence about Mumbai. It was about driving around Mumbai. He did everything you could imagine on the way, but decided to skip Mumbai completely."
Not All Of It. Just Some Of It.
"Paris. I used to hate all French people because of my experiences there, and then I met one who explained that there's basically two Frances; Paris and everywhere else, and then we bonded over bad mouthing the place and now my antipathy is more precise."
It's All In The Family
"LA, if you want half quality people, air, and living for double the price and problems, it might be for you"
"I have friends who live in LA, and swear it's awesome. But they actually live in Rancho Palos Verdes, in their parent's mansions."
And then there's cities like these.
Cities so bad an introduction isn't required.
What's Your Excuse?
"The Simpsons summed it up perfectly: "We were born here, what's your excuse?"
"I can laugh at this because I'm from Thunder Bay"
Booze. Sex. Sin. All The Best Family Values.
"Las Vegas. Fun to visit, but not where I'd want to raise my family."
"I think my first realization that people grow up and live in Las Vegas was at 16 or so when watching Criminal Minds and hearing that Spencer Reid grew up there. It was that record scratch moment. Wait, people LIVE IN and raise their babies in the city of sex, sin, and gambling? I felt stupid, of course, upon realizing that all the casino workers and strippers have to live somewhere, and might fall in love, and might marry and have kids."
"And then I had a second life-changing revelation when I realized people probably feel the exact same way about my home city, Miami. I was raised there and lived there for 2 decades. A lot of people have no concept of Miami outside TV and probably think my parents are horrible people who raised me in a den of yachts, Pitbull, cocaine, dirty money, bad boob jobs, and spring breakers. Meanwhile I actually lived in a very normal and boring suburb."
A Slow Decline Over Time
"Gary Indiana. Went through there when heading to O'hare & was not impressed. heard multiple gunshots when driving through."
"So I literally learned about Gary, Indiana from these threads where it always pops up as one of the worst places to live or be. Could you explain why it is so sh-tty?"
"Long story made short, Gary was a good place to live. Nice paying steel industry jobs. That went away. High crime rate, high poverty rate, and empty, falling down buildings everywhere. I used to live in Chicago and would avoid Gary when traveling at all cost."
Each city is different. What works for some might not be what works for others.
However, it does feel like some of these cities need to be at the top of your "Never Visit" list, don't they?
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Sex is fun. Sex is healthy. Sex should be enjoyed and always consensual. But often, sex can be dangerous, especially when you're trying out new things, like a new location.
Who hasn't thought about upping the adrenaline ante when it comes to sexytime? We've all been there. But some ideas really should just stay ideas.
Why break a hip or an arm just to make things a little more saucy? Just try a different room in the house, or the backyard, but bring bug spray.
And some areas in public are safety hazards for a reason.
Redditor u/playfulinvestment01 wanted to know about all the places we need to avoid when it's sexytime, by asking:
What is the worst place you had sex?
I can tell you from experience that airplanes are not a good idea. Don't ask me how I know. A lady never kisses and tells, but highlights are ok. There will never be enough room and the movies are lying.
Like Glue...Melissa Mccarthy Falling GIFGiphy
"I lived in Australia for a bit and our studio had this black pleather couch. It looked exactly like that casting couch meme so we tried it for fun once. My ex sweats a lot even when it's not 40C out, but it was and we stuck to the couch like glue."
"On a hike in a wildlife refuge. We went off the trail to a more remote area. Was all fun and games tell I got stung on the penis. Was after the event had ended when I was briefly exposed, the little moron went right at me. We joke about it regularly, I'd say it comes up monthly. Just out of the blue she will say "hey remember when you got stung on your penis?" Yes, I remember and will never forget."
Up a Tree
"A "treehouse" that was actually a plywood shack on 6' stilts. It was pretty old and the plywood was splintery, so he laid down an old towel for me (you know, like a gentleman.) Also it was too small for me to fit in any direction, so my head stuck out the door. I stared at the sky and just... And that's the story of how I lost my virginity! A close second would be the bed in his semi-abandoned house full of the semi-abandoned hoarded belongings of his mother. But that's a different story."
"Met a girl online and we tried to do it at the park. A cop showed up before we started and told us we had to leave. We went back to our cars which was at a small shopping mall. We went behind the shopping mall and got it on behind a dumpster. It worked out well so we met up there again a week later. Except that time, as we were walking away, a dump truck picked the dumpster to empty the trash. Was hilarious at the time but frightening looking back on it. This was about 10 years ago."
Keyed OffPiano Performing GIFGiphy
"I don't recommend on top of a piano. Very uncomfortable and not at all the experience we envisioned."
Scratchy...Screaming The Voice GIF by NBCGiphy
"Bottom of cliff next to the ocean. Turns out I have an allergic reaction to coral and my back was scratched the hell up from it. It was windy, wet, and itchy. Runner up is a movie theatre."
"In a literal smoke house... lost my virginity with about 50 rings of deer sausage hanging around to dry. My friend and his dad were gone and we were like "this seems like a great place!" At least when I went home I smelled like venison instead of sex."
"I'm not sure if this counts because we didn't get very far. But In a Burger King parking lot… He had a car, so we would park it someplace and hook up in the tiny little two-seater. I was sitting astride him and most of my clothes were off when he froze. I looked over my shoulder and the once abandoned parking lot was abandoned no more. A family of four were just staring at us through the windshield. We didn't know what to do so I just put my shirt back on and we drove away."
"we can hear everything"
"My childhood house had an enclosed porch that was level with my parents' bedroom window (it's hard to explain). You couldn't see into the porch from the window, but if the porch windows were open and the bedroom windows were open you could hear everything from either room."
"So my now husband and I were trying to have sex in that porch, having opened the windows cuz it was hot AH. My parents usually never opened their window and it was past ten, when they usually went to sleep. We weren't trying to be loud, but apparently we were."
"After we were done, I checked my phone and I had 5 missed calls and a text from my mother saying "we can hear everything" and "please at least use a condom". We didn't acknowledge it at the time but my mom got drunk a few years ago and told my aunt the story and said she was worried she was hearing the conception of her grandchild."
Ivy!jerry seinfeld help GIF by HULUGiphy
"After a drunken night on 6th st in Austin, girl and I were walking down red river st, she drags me in this bushy grassy area, we go at it, finish, call an Uber to west campus, continue going at it. The next day, we are super itchy, come to find later it was poison ivy, got it all over our genitals. Fun times. 10/10 would do it again though."
Also, be careful when and if you do it on a bus. You're never fully out of the driver's line of sight. Don't ask me how I know, I just do. Be careful out there but have fun.