
Former Friends Reveal The Things That Destroyed Their Strongest Relationships
[rebelmouse-image 18349681 is_animated_gif=Friendship is supposed to be one of the closest relationship bonds a person can have. That doesn't mean it's always sunshine and roses. When friendships go wrong, holy CRAP do they go wrong. It's only with that kind of injury that a person can build up the kind of rage it takes to truly hold a grudge. Long story short, ending friendships can get ugly and we're about to talk about it. One Reddit user posed the question:
Things are about to get high-drama and NSFW, so grab your popcorn and your favorite sassy reaction memes; we're about to do this:
Didn't Make The Cut
[rebelmouse-image 18349682 is_animated_gif=My friend and I both tried out for the badminton team in grade 7. After the first tryouts they call back for a second set. The list was posted on the bulletin board, so after class she went and checked (I asked her to tell me if I made it). She came back saying neither of us did, and I thought that was the end of it.
The second tryouts were happening the next morning before class. During homeroom that day a girl in my class asked me why I wasn't at tryouts. I told her that I didn't make it, at least that's what Friend told me. She informed me that I did, so I went and checked at morning break. My name was on the list. I went and talked to the gym teacher in charge and he let me do a quick tryout at lunch. I didn't end up making the team (which I was okay with, I'd already accepted that fact). This was now 10 years ago and I'm so salty. I've dealt with a lot of s*** from this girl, but we're still friends.
They Fled The Country???
[rebelmouse-image 18349683 is_animated_gif=This was 7 years ago and I'm still mad about it. I'm 30 now and we were friends from the age of 4 to 23 so almost 20 years, and we had borrowed money from each other all the time and always paid it back, so one day he asked to borrow a few grand for a car and I was like sure no problem, he'll pay me back next month like he always does (I borrowed the same amount from him before FYI). I transferred the money and then didn't hear from him for a few days so went round his parents and turns out he used the money to move abroad and set up a new life with a random woman he met online. I almost wish I could say it didn't work out but they got married and had 3 kids and now live in a nice big house, but I gave him all the money I had at the time and it ruined me for quite a long time and I got into debt and other issues which just spiralled from that point. I know which city he lives in but not much more than that, and haven't had what I would consider a best friend again since.
The 20-year Dinner Ban
[rebelmouse-image 18349684 is_animated_gif=Mom planned a small dinner party with another family. She cooked all day, set the table, probably made my dad put a playlist together, and waited for them to arrive. The call and say "oh, we can't make it, something better came up".
They are still friends, but my mother hasn't invited them over for dinner in 20 years. And my mom is an amazing cook.
To this day they still say "oh, we never come over for dinner any more!" And my mom will respond, "yes, that's right, you don't." I like to think I inherited her grudge-holding ability.
Catfish
[rebelmouse-image 18349685 is_animated_gif=I was really lonely in high school and bullied a lot. When I was about 14 or 15, my only "best friend" at the time teamed up with two girls who didn't like me to essentially Catfish me. I don't know why, we weren't fighting or anything. Anyway, they pretended to be a guy romantically interested in me and e-mailed me out of the blue. They talked to me for months as this guy, before I trusted "him" enough to give him answers to really personal questions.
I found out who "he" really was after they told everyone every scrap of personal information I'd told my online friend. And it was some pretty personal s***. I was already depressed, and this experience ended up making me start self harming - a habit I only finally kicked about a year ago.
F*ck you, Melissa. It's been 15 years and I still think it was a shitty thing to do to me.
Justifiable Anger
[rebelmouse-image 18346010 is_animated_gif=Rented my property and kept the money without telling me while simultaneously f-ing my girlfriend. Yeah, I'm still angry.
The Wedding Brush-Off
[rebelmouse-image 18349687 is_animated_gif=A friend texted me the night before my wedding to say that she couldn't attend because she couldn't afford to go. (Wedding was a 30 minute car journey from home) The day after the wedding she had posted photographs on Facebook being out drinking the night of my wedding. Haven't spoken to her since.
Choosing The Girl Over A Lifelong Friend
[rebelmouse-image 18349688 is_animated_gif=Not really salty about it anymore, it's been to long. My best friend growing up stopped being friends because of a girl he just meet. We became friends when we were 4. He was 3 months older them me, so growing up we went to school. Our parents were friends. We went to the same church. So we spent most of our time hanging out.
When we were 17 he met this girl and after the first time she met me she told him she didn't want him hanging out with me, right in front of me. Without hesitation he told me to leave and never talked to me again. It's been nearly 20 years now. I see him about once every couple of years. He's married to her now. He's not allowed to have friends outside of her family and is completely miserable. His parents can't stand her because of how unbelievably rude she is to them and rarely lets them see their grand-kids. It's been so long now that I could care less and barely know them, but it's not something I would forgive.
I Do... Not Blame You.
[rebelmouse-image 18349689 is_animated_gif=My best-man is now engaged to my ex-wife. Dead Sea salty about that still.
Taking A Homeless Person's Money
[rebelmouse-image 18349690 is_animated_gif=When I was in my late teens, I was essentially homeless. One of my absolute best friends was moving away for college and offered to let me stay in his apartment for the remainder of the lease if I would cover half the rent. I was working at a sandwich place at the time, not making more than $7.50 per hour, so it sounded like a great deal.
I paid him for the first month, and was evicted less than month later by the apartment managers. Turns out my bestie hadn't been paying rent, took my money and left me without a place to live.
One of my co-workers let me stay with him until I could get back on my feet.
A few years ago, my former friend saw me at a bar during the holidays and tried to talk to me. Without a word, I just gave him the most blank, vacant, uncaring stare I've ever given anyone in my life. He eventually left me alone.
No Love For Brother
[rebelmouse-image 18349691 is_animated_gif=I was visiting my parents with my dog a few months ago, my brother came into the house and as a normal happy dog would he ran to the door in excitement and is standing about 2 feet away just wagging his tail awaiting the new visitor.
My brother decided he didn't like my dog being at the door and kicked my pup as hard as he could in the stomach. My dog is 180 pounds and I've barely heard him whimper in pain at any point. My dog let out the loudest Yelp and ran to me with his tail tucked whimpering. That's how hard my brother had kicked him.
I'm not a generally angry person and I hardly ever yell and I especially am NOT a fighter. That day my family saw a side of me that they never have. My dad had to physically pull me off of my brother and kicked him out. I believe I said some pretty graphic things about how I was going to kill him. Don't fuck with my dog. Ever.
Nintendo
[rebelmouse-image 18349692 is_animated_gif=My best friend selling my Nintendo for heroin. Not great.
The Drummer
[rebelmouse-image 18349693 is_animated_gif=I had a bandmate (the drummer... always the f*cking drummer) who was always kind of shiftless and self-absorbed but funny and talented, which goes a long way in a band situation. Jim was never on time, serially unapologetic about being an hour late, and was a prima donna about his performances. After a few years of this, I got sick of it and we disbanded.
Fast forward another year, Jim calls me up and tells me he's moving to my city and was wondering if I could give him a job at my construction company. Against my better judgement, I give him a qualified yes. Turns out he was as shitty an employee as he was a bandmate: always late, always texting, futzing around so it took twice as long to do something as it should. Eventually, after numerous attempts to whip him into shape, I let him go.
In the interim, a lot of personal things had happened, including me getting separated/divorced. One day, my ex texts me some screen shots of the conversation Jim initiated. "Hey, girl, just checking on you to make sure you're okay. Breakups are hard. Call me if you need anything..." To her credit, her response was along the lines of, "If I did, I'd probably call somebody else. When was the last time you talked to twelvesteprevenge, anyway?"
He plays drums in a band with other friends of mine but I refuse to go to any of their shows because f*ck you, Jim.
She Could Have Afforded To Repay
[rebelmouse-image 18349694 is_animated_gif=A friend was leaving a crappy relationship, she had a one year old son and was pretty down on her luck. She asked to borrow $2000 for a damage deposit and first months rent and promised to pay me back after her next payday. I was naive and trusted her. In hindsight, I should have known, due to her situation that she wouldn't be able to pay me back that quickly. Anyway, gave her the money and haven't seen a dime of it. What makes it unforgivable for me is that in the 3 years that have passed, she is doing well, bought a brand new car, moved to a nice condo, always has her hair and nails done etc. I feel like if she can afford these things, she could have paid me $50 each pay period or whatever she could, when she could, but obviously paying me back/our friendship is not a priority for her... in fact, whenever I have contacted her about it she just ignores me. Lesson definitely learned, I don't lend anyone money and will teach my children the same. I know not everyone is like my "friend" but it often seems that people who are generous/good natured get taken advantage of.
Attempted Kidnapping
[rebelmouse-image 18349695 is_animated_gif=My 14 yo daughter went through a phase where she became very neglectful in her school attendance and studies so as punishment she was not allowed any tv or music until her homework was done every night -- apparently this was too much for her and she ended up running away -- leaving a note that said "Don't come looking for me because you won't find me. I love you but I just need to get away and find myself. Bye."
I immediately called all her friends in her little phone book -- no one had heard or seen her (this was at 9:00 pm) and as my husband drove around to all her favorite spots to check and see if she was there, I called the police.
They arrived took all the info down, a current picture of her etc. and said they'd issue a BOLO (Be On the Look Out) and bring her home if they spotted her.
I then sat waiting for my husband to return and decided to call my bff, crying hysterically about what had happened.
She listened patiently and gave all the proper sympathetic responses including that if my daughter didn't return by that night (she lived two hours away in another city) she would come in the morning and stay with me to show support and brain storm.
I agreed and we cried together some more and then we ended the conversation.
We didn't sleep all night and jumped out of my skin every time the phone rang. Morning arrived and so did my bff.
She would leave for home at dark and return in tbe morning every day for the almost three weeks our daughter was missing. All along being a rock to me as support. Brain storming, making more calls to other family and friends for me, put her kids on the look out and to spread the word etc..made meals so I didn't have to cook and gave me hugs and her shoulder to cry on, often times crying with me.
Almost three weeks into my daughter being missing the phone rang and it was the police -- talk about a heart attack, especially since they had found the body of a female at a isolated park -- and all they simply said "Mrs. Worry We found her!"
I cried and said "Is she ok?" and I sware I stopped breathing until he answered.
He says "Yes, she's fine. Has a mouth on her and we feel sorry for you, but she's fine. Another PD found her in another county, recognized her from her picture and brought her in. She's here, if you want to come pick her up. We wouldn't blame you if you decided to leave her here, but she is here."
I laughed between tears and said I'd be right down -- coincidently my bff had decided to stay home that day and so I called my husband from work to come home so we could go get our daughter together.
Here's the "shorter" part of this story.
Fast forward after many months of counseling and an actual in patient hospitalization for our daughter she snapped out of it and once again there was peace and joy in our home.
So imagine my surprise when one night as my daughter and I were having our nightly mother/daughter chats while staring at the stars on our deck -- my daughter blurts out , " Mom aren't you curious about the where, who or what of my little excursion?"
I hadn't pushed her for details because I didn't want to stress her and figured I'd hear it from her sooner or later. So I just said "Yes, but only when you're ready. Don't you want to know what and how I felt finding you gone?"
She said yes and so I vented my fears, worries and sleepless nights and made the ending comment of "...had it not been forBFF being a great friend to me I'd have lost it."
My daughter by now was softly weeping at my anguish and said "Mom...she's NOT your friend."
And I said "Why do you say that?"
And my daughter said "Because....I was hiding out at her house all that time. She hid me from you and kept encouraging me not to go home that she had always wanted a daughter like me and I could stay and be her daughter. She evil and mean, she's also jealous of you and likes daddy and told me that she wish she had your looks and money and life. She's NOT your friend. But please don't tell her I told you. She made me promise not to say anything."
I could have fell out of my chair in shock.
The next morning after my daughter went to school, I got in my car and drove the two hours to my bff house. She was shocked to see me (she had been inexplicably absent since our daughter was "returned") and I could see the worry and slight fear in her face but tried to act like nothing was wrong.
She didn't originally invite me in like usual and had a death grip on her door knob so I knew SHE KNEW why I was there.
I said WHAT? You're not going to invite me in now? And she quickly caught herself and said "OH, sorry come on in".
No sooner had we sat down and I let her have it with a tongue lashing she's never had before and I ended it with "You're evil and no friend of mine and I never want to see you EVER again!!! And you better pray to God that I can't prosecute you for kidnapping!!" then I stormed out.
We'd been friends since grade school!
How she could have done that to us is beyond me, and I could have easily beat the crap out of her but chose the high road.
Something that I still regret talking and NOT beating the crap out of her.
I want her to feel the pain she caused me by knowing all along my daughter was at her house while she cried with me and held my hand and SAW THE PAIN I WAS SUFFERING.
A pure sociopath. Ughh.
Stolen Art
[rebelmouse-image 18349697 is_animated_gif=He was an artist and I was a writer. I had a script written out for a graphic novel, he wanted to work on it and I agreed.
He did no work whatsoever for two months. Not a single sketch. Instead, he put his name on my story and took a meeting with a publisher through a contact he had. He told me about it after they let him know they weren't interested and acted like it was no big deal.
Needless to say, I lost my shit. I made him show me all the stuff he showed them. His name, everywhere. His contact info, everywhere. My name was on one page, under his. Everything he showed them was 100% my work, even what sketches there were were from me, and he acted like he did it all.
I told him to f*ck right off, forever.
Don't Bring Missionaries
[rebelmouse-image 18349698 is_animated_gif=I had some friends from church that I thought understood and supported me. I am athiest, and don't even want to discuss religion. They called to see when was a good time to visit me, and I was excited to hear from them. They brought pushy missionaries. I'm still mad about it, and don't reach out to them because of it. At the time I kept the peace, now I regret not saying something because it was just rude.
Cat Food For The Abused
[rebelmouse-image 18349699 is_animated_gif=My mother used to starve me. Like literal abuse. If I was lucky I'd get a quarter of a butter sandwich for lunch and for tea, a dried lump of old cooked pasta that had been defrosted by being left in the counter all day. I used to be so so hungry!
A friends mother took pity on me, I don't know how it came about, but she began sending my friend in with an extra lunch every day in school. It was only a sandwich and a juice but wow, I had food that was nice and filling! I was so thankful and I made it clear that I was.
Then one day, the friend decided it would be funny to put cat food in the sandwiches and give them to me. When I realized what she'd done, she laughed so publicly at me for being such a scrounger.
Obviously it was an amazing thing that that friends parents did for me, I was definitely a scrounger by all means but I was so hungry! I still don't trust others with my food though
That Playlist, Though...
[rebelmouse-image 18348806 is_animated_gif=I had two friends in middle school and we would always hang out. We had a whole friend group and for the first time in my life I felt like I had friends and like I belonged somewhere.
About halfway through ninth grade, my two friends just stopped talking to me and inviting me to stuff. They were shutting me out. So I automatically started thinking it was a problem with me. I racked my brain trying to figure it out. Cried and cried cause I was losing my only friends.
Years later, I talked to one of them about it and asked why they shut me out. He said, "do you really want to know?" Obviously I did. He said it was because of the music I listened to. I listened to Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, AC/DC, all that good stuff. They listened to All American Rejects and We The Kings, etc. I told him that was the dumbest fucking reason and walked away.
I went through agony trying to figure out what I did wrong and it was just what I had on my iPod.
Medical Snooping
[rebelmouse-image 18349700 is_animated_gif=I caught a former friend rifling through correspondence between me and an online Dr.
I went MENTAL.
I was a closeted trans-woman at the time. Im still mostly closeted to this day (but slowly breaking out) - but what gives the prick the right to read letters Iv kept aside in my own home?
The excuse of You've looked depressed for ages and I just wanted to see if there's anything I can do just doesn't cut it. How dare anyone read my mail in the 1st place. Even worse - when it's clearly medically related - to keep going.
Screw him. We don't speak anymore.
H/T: Reddit
Not everyone is capable of mastering the art of conversation.
It takes skill to perpetuate a lively discussion while also being a respectful listener.
Some people are naturals at this.
Others, however, make up for their self-aware verbal shortcomings by overcompensating. Unfortunately, the ruse ends up exposing their insecurity, much to the delight of their amused audience.
Curious to hear examples of this, Redditor TheArchitect_7 asked:
"What’s a thing dumb people say that makes them think they sound smart?"

Some people just want reactions more than a back-and-forth interaction.
Attention-Seeker
"'You wouldn't understand.' Yeah, that's why I asked you for an explanation."
– Appropriate_Donkey18
Fancy Words
"I sometimes use big words that I don't really understand to make myself sound more ambidextrous."
– Alone_Ad1278
Looking At The Score
"The more someone emphasizes their IQ, the less smart I think they actually are."
– rmshilpi
Hackneyed Sayings
"Everything happens for a reason, nothing is actually 'free' as someone has to pay for it, both parties are the same, you may have book smarts, but I have street smarts, common sense isn't so common anymore, but that's how we've always done it!"
"An addition to the previous: 'We will send 40 billion to Ukraine, but we won't spend 40 billion to secure our schools!'"
– humorous_anecdote
Things can get wacky when dealing with someone who is cantankerous.
Futile Argument
"Something along the lines of 'You can’t prove it didn’t happen.'"
"A guy at work tried to pull this one on me. He believed one of those Animal Planet mockumentaries about a giant killer shark was real. When I told him it was all fiction and that there was no real proof of this kind of stuff, he tried to argue back about while he couldn’t prove it, I couldn’t disprove it either."
"There’s a saying about getting into an argument with a stupid person. This was my real world experience with it."
– WongoKnight
Status
"Do you know who I am?"
– FoxFourTwo
The Equivalent Of Winning
"Thinking that getting a reaction out of someone is the same thing as winning an argument."
– bcopes158
Please Define
"My friend once used the phrase 'By its very definition' while we were arguing about something...so I asked him what the definition actually was, while he fumbled with that a bit I told him to stop using weasel words."
– groovyinutah
No Kidding
"'it all depends on how you look at it.' yeah thats f'king obvious."
– psychpopnprogncore
We all love a good malaprop.
Or Intents
"For all intensive purposes"
– p38-lightning
It's Moot, Really
“Mute point”
"Cracks me up every time."
– Ed_The_Bloody
Sometimes, editing yourself a bit in discourse with those who are intellectually out of your league is better than trying to keep up with them in an attempt to win their favor by articulating something you know nothing about.
I would explain better, but you wouldn't understand.
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*The following article contains discussion of suicide/self-harm.
Positive memories stay with us forever that we can always revisit with a smile.
Witnessing a loved one receiving their diploma after years of dedicated studying, celebrating a sports victory with other teammates, or traveling to a dream destination with your significant other after months–even years–of careful planning.
But in addition to reveling in nostalgia, there are other life experiences we'd like to soon forget but have a difficult time shaking off.
Curious to hear about some of the more ominous events experienced by strangers online, Redditor IM_Not_A_Robot_10110 asked:
"What have you witnessed that will haunt you forever?"

What happens inside hospitals are full of trauma and heartache, even medical professionals have a hard time processing what they encounter.
The Pediatric Patient
"X-ray tech here, but I was a student at the time. Called to ER for trauma code. Only know it's a pediatric patient. The terror as I walk around the corner and see it's a little boy, same size as my son. We go to take an x-ray and he's making this high pitched shrill wheezing noise. They couldn't intubate enroute so we were doing a chest/neck to see what was going on. His neck was full of air."
"Come to find out the story later, he had tripped and fallen in school and his neck went square on a desk and he had broken his trachea. Believe he was stabilized & flown out. Never found out what happened after."
– ZephyrGrace
Calling Time Of Death
"ER nurse. This won’t haunt me in a bad way, but it’ll stick with me for sure. We were coding a middle aged lady we knew was going to die. We were pulling out the last ditch stuff hoping we’d get lucky, but everyone knew which way it was going."
"Family was there and in the room. When it was clear we had run through all the Hail Marys and it was time to call it, the husband spoke up for the first time. He had apparently been an EMT for a long time so he knew what he was looking at. He said he was going to do the final round of compressions."
"It was very respectfully done. He got up to do his 2 minutes, the nurses quietly started turning things off so there wouldn’t be continuous alarms, we called for a pulse check which the husband did, then we called time of death. He was thankful we let him do that and I was thankful to be a part of it."
– pause_and_consider
Missing Jaw
"Not me, but my roommates fiancé is a flight nurse. She told me this story around Easter."
"They showed up to a scene being told beforehand that there was a patient with a gun shot wound and bleeding bad but that’s all they were told. When they got there they found a woman who was sitting on the ambulance gurney completely lucid and looking around, completely missing her lower jaw. She said you could see down her throat and she looked like a zombie. Her lower jaw was hanging to the side by some tissue and when she looked about it swung around and dangled. She said the woman seemed relatively calm and when she tried to speak what was left of her tongue kinda moved but nothing but gurgles came out."
"It was not a suicide, her boyfriend accidentally discharged his firearm while they were in his car."
"She survived."
– New_Hand_Luke
AIDS Epidemic Era
"Retired RN. I was working in the PACU and helped another nurse take her patient to his room. As I was adjusting something by his head, he grabbed my hand and started crying. He kept saying I don’t want to die. He was barely 20. In an isolation room. I looked into his eyes and tried to comfort him as he sobbed. This was in the early days of the 'AIDS epidemic.' He died within a week. To this day I still see his eyes and hear him sobbing."
– Tkay906363
Traffic accidents can be some of the most gruesome scenes no one should ever have to witness.
Accident Victim
"I live next to a busy street, inbetween lanes is a tram station. Teenager wanted to cross and got run over by a tram. Well, partly run over, he ended up with his body squeezed in between the tram and the tram station wall, with his legs stuck under the tram. It took about 1,5 hours until they had the equipment to lift the tram to get him out of there. They managed to reanimate what was left of him but he died in the hospital."
– ir_blues
Dangerous Road
"It was Easter Sunday about 5 in the afternoon. I was driving home from the lake with a friend of mine on a country highway that’s pretty well traveled. It’s one of those single lane coming and single lane going where the speed limit is 70 roads. The intersections are far and few between so instead of an overpass it’s just a blinking yellow caution light. In what literally felt like the blink of an eye the car driving in front of me is struck on the drivers side door."
"The impact pushes both cars off to the road and onto the shoulder. I hit my brakes and was able to stop to help render aid. My friend and I get out of the car and run over to help. The drivers side door is crushed inward, driver has been pushed into the passenger side. It was a younger lady, maybe mid 30s. The impact pushed her out of her seat and into her daughter."
"You ever see movies where a dead body jump scares someone and it just stares at the with wide eyes and mouth agape….. yeah. The girl is ok but very confused. She has no visible injuries and is freely looking around so we unbuckled her and pulled her out of the car so she didn’t realize her mom was laying on her. As we do it I look at the mom and I can see a little life is left in her, so I said the only thing we could say. 'She’s alright.'”
"You could see the light in her eyes fade and she passes away. More cars stop and help out. As more people are here to help I start to realize that someone has been screaming, at me. In the back seat is her son. He must have been knocked unconscious and he’s now yelling, not out in pain but asking 'Is mom okay, is she okay?' I had no words for him, he was maybe 6. His sister was about 9. Thankfully about 4 of the cars that stopped were off duty first responders so they quickly took over for me. This was about 20 years ago, I was 17 at the time and I just saw a mom die in front of her 2 kids. I’m crying now thinking back on it and to this day I still refuse to ever take that road again."
"They finally build an actual stop light a couple years back. The area isn’t more crowded so I can only imagine what the motivation to improve that intersection was."
– Boothulu
Pedestrians
"I was designated driver at my friend's 30th birthday party. Had just dropped off my last friend and I was heading home. Little blue car zipped by me going maybe 10 over. Maybe a block ahead of me I see the speeding car hit two 20 yr olds who were running across the street. They were running to McDonald's across from the nightclub they were partying at and didn't wait for a red light. I'll never forget the girls blond hair in the bright headlights as she got hit. One thing that isn't ever correct in tv shows when people get hit by cars is how much damage it does to a human body. I distinctly remember his legs laying like 2m from his body. Both died right when paramedics got there."
– SuchAGeoNerd
PTSD
"Getting hit by a car really is ugly. My girlfriend accidentally stepped on the street while we were having a minor disagreement and bam she was gone in a moment. I have ptsd, I can still see all the blood, her trying to breathe and the moment she gave up."
– More-Masterpiece-561
You never know when a friend or acquaintance is going through an extremely rough time–even though they present themselves differently in public.
All we could ever be as fellow humans is to always be compassionate.
Prolonged Guilt
"I found my roommates body in our apartment when I was in college. He had suffocated himself with a helium tank and a plastic bag over his head. That fucked me up pretty good, especially because I knew he was struggling with his mental health. He was cutting himself too, he tried to hide it but I noticed. And I didn’t say a word, i didn’t offer a helping hand. I could have done something to help him, but I didn’t. That guilt is still there, 10 years down the line."
– Jon__Snuh
What The Taxi Driver Witnessed
"I was driving Taxi once and I picked up someone who said he thinks he just saw a dead body. Said someone had jumped from the top of the parking garage. There was already an ambulance and what not on the scene. I remember briefly thinking of my friend Willzo, but dismissed it, I didn’t even think he was depressed like that. I found it odd that I would even consider such a thing out of nowhere. But I dismissed the thought and went about my work night. Couple days later I got a call from a mutual friend. 'Hey buddy, did you hear about Will? He jumped off the parking garage a few days ago.'”
– Everywhere-Danger
These Redditors' stories are a lot to take in.
However, they are good reminders about the brevity of life and how we should always strive towards being the best versions of ourselves while we're still alive.
Because you never know when you or someone close to you will have their last breath.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
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People Divulge The Most Genuine Things You Can Say To Someone Suffering From Depression
Depression sucks.
It's hard to live with and near impossible to overcome.
I know, I struggle everyday.
It's always appreciative to have people who "try" to empathize.
But often the sentiment doesn't fit the delivery.
There are ways to comfort a sad person that doesn't make it worse.
I know you're trying your best.
But let's make your best... the greatest.
RedditorHeavy-Strain32wanted to discuss the best ways to help a person suffering.
They asked:
"What's the most genuine thing you can say to a person going through depression?"
I always appreciate someone willing to cry with me. That is a big help. Just a suggestion.
Genuine
‘"It’s really difficult isn’t it.' I loved this line that my therapist said when I was sharing my struggles. There was no judgment, no advice, just felt like I was genuinely being heard."
xlOREOlx
Best Way
"This is like my favorite show of sympathy/empathy I've ever witnessed. Zuko hearing Sokka tell him about his girlfriend: "that's rough, buddy."
"Not saying sorry for your loss and putting the weight of saying 'it's ok' on the one experiencing the pain, no 'here's a relevant story of mine to show how I can relate' just..."
"'Sh*t man, the thing you went through was rough and you're justified for feeling this way.'"
Exodan
I miss that guy...
"My boss once said to me 'there's nothing wrong with what you're feeling - you're sick. And it's not something that's easy to live with. don't feel bad because you have an illness you can't fix - you wouldn't expect someone with cancer to feel bad, would you?' He then gave me a man hug and we had beers and a vent session for three hours. I miss that guy."
frothy_Wombat
Basics
“I’m grilling tonight, wanna come over?”
"Honestly, when I’ve been depressed there is a double layer of shame. Being treated as a friend just like any other made it feel like I was still part of society and community. Being treated with mittens makes you feel even more worthless and a pariah."
ThinkIGotHacked
Love
"I love you buddy. Friend of mine said it to me when I was struggling. It was instantly disarming of my bad thoughts and still resonates with me now. I find it hard to say myself though as I never really had a male role model growing up."
alidaf
All great suggestions so far. Empathy is easy...
Possibilities
"Anything that isn't a variation of 'think positive.' The illness makes it literally impossible. I liked to hear that I still meant something to the people in my life, despite me not being able to give."
raxeira-etterath
The Moments
"It's the hugs that don't even need said. At my last job I was in a dark place at the time and slipping back into depression. My blow up at work went from work issues to issues in my life and I didn't realize how far I went and my sauté guy held me. It's the most human moment I've had and it broke me in a good way. Sometimes just having a moment of that same feeling of connection, physical or not, can be what saves and/or helps that person."
Bfab94
no obligation...
"I’m not the best person to come to with these problems so when people around me do have that I always tell them the same thing, 'Want to go fishing? I’m bringing a grill and some charcoal.'"
2Agunsarearight
"We all get taken off guard, especially if you didn’t notice any changes in their behavior before. Often just a simple invite to hang out (no obligation) can be enough to remind somebody they aren’t alone and have a friend."
JakeFromFarmState1
“I understand”
"Lots of conflicting stuff here, because I’m seeing many suggest 'I understand' - but to me I hated hearing that. I always felt like 'no you don’t. You may know what it’s like to be in your own version of hell, but not mine.' For me, I think I always preferred those who said 'I want to try to understand' or just a simple 'love you' or 'want to hang out and not talk to each other at all and watch scrubs?'"
Iamdogfather
Simple
"I might not understand what you're going through, but I'm here for you and I love you."
tarkinlarson
Ways to be there. Chapter One....
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So many things always seem like a good idea at first.
That is what happens when the bandwagon begins.
First there are the select few onboard.
Then the explosion of mass appeal.
Then for awhile we're in all the rage.
Eventually you look at a certain "thing" and realize... "oh not cute."
Like a McDonald's McRib. No.
It's not BBQ, it's not pork.
No. What else can we ad to the list of not hot?
Redditor koolxxxxxxxxwanted to compare notes on what is something that is not as sexy when you really think about it.
They asked:
"What's not as attractive as people think?"
So we have to rethink a few things about what is enticing to us. For me it's exercise. You?
Edits
"Photos edited past the point of recognition."
tiny_butt_toucher
"I can't believe so many people just get rid of all their wrinkles and skin tone it's so weird. I actually really like stuff like smile lines it just shows how someone is probably quite kind. :)"
beluuuuuuga
Mouths
"Lip injections."
AnakinnTargaryen
"I swear it's like an epidemic in my country. Every single one has it or at least considers it, including myself. Many with a face beyond recognition. It doesn't help that it is not talked about enough and every single person on TV has at least 1ml of something in their mouth."
el_99
Bad Smarts
"Playing dumb to get attention. F-ing drives me nuts."
rcahelbug70
"I am a woman nearing 40. All my life I have heard men claim they like intelligent women but my experience tells me otherwise. Some men may like intelligent women sometimes but no man likes a woman smarter than them."
imdungrowinup
"I’m naturally blonde, so I have a game I like to play with anyone who is instantly condescending to me. Basically I play stupid, gradually removing IQ points by the question, until they realize I’m not stupid at all and baiting them. It pisses them off and makes my day a bit brighter."
TotallyUnnecessarry
Eye Roll
"Bragging about how many people you’ve slept with or how many people wanna sleep with you."
fcangirl
"I was on a train the other day and had to hear some guy rattle on to his friends about all the ethnicities/nationalities of women he's messed with for like 20 minutes before my stop. I could not roll my eyes any harder."
caffeinated_tea
"The way I see it is most of us are adults here and have done stuff with people previously. But that doesn't mean I'm going to go into all the nasty details of who what when where and how or even the why."
lyriumstone
Use the Moon
"The sun tan (usually fake) that makes people look like oranges."
Ezekku
I will never understand the over tanning. You look like an alien.
Popular
"Being popular on social media."
halfmeasures611
"I find it so attractive when a guy has no social media presence."
procrastinatinq
"chasing"
"Completely unoriginal, but playing hard to get. I don't like 'chasing.' If you say no, I'm accepting a f**king no."
ThatRandomDev
"Yea dude, I was chasing a girl in college and she just kept saying no to dates, going to parties, just hanging out. A few months later I started seeing another girl, turned out to be her roommate and she flipped out because she had a crush on me. I was like wtf?"
Woah_man34
Where you going?
"Revving your car engine to the max. It’s annoying."
user100372
"Especially when you are just walking down the street, paying no mind to the road (obviously to where you're going), and out of nowhere someone just drives by and revs their engine to the max."
lavliex
"It's only acceptable when you're driving through a tunnel. The acoustics in them makes revved engines sound amazing."
Electrical_Age_336
I'm Choking
"Stop marinating in cologne and perfume. It makes me instantly dislike being around you."
throwingplaydoh
"I have a food delivery driver that bathes in perfume. I do contactless delivery so she just leaves the food outside, but I always know it was her because the smell when I open the door is still crazy strong. I feel like some people don't know how strong it is."
HereOnCompanyTime
LIES!!
"Burgers from fast food restaurants. They look much better in the ads."
Substantial-Hotel16
"The true catfish."
jmcatm0m16
Not so Hot. Let's tone it down.
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