Bullies are people too. It's difficult to acknowledge that, for sure. When you're the tormented person you don't care, nor do you have to care about why the person torturing you is doing it. The black and white answer is that they have no right, no matter how much pain the are in. But it is nice when down the road people recognize the error of their ways and even make atonement.
Redditor u/MrCleanisagodlybeing wanted the reformed bullies out there to share by asking.... Ex Bullies of reddit, what's your side of the story?
It wasn't me....
Giphy
She blamed me for stealing a fruit roll up when I didn't. I just happened to have one as well. I got in trouble. My parents were abusive. I got a pretty bad beating that day. I bullied her until I moved away in 10th grade. awwsomedraggin
I didn't know....
Genuinely just didn't know why i was bullying the dude. i thought we were having some friendly horseplay fun every day as i was one of those girls who liked to show off my strength to the boys so they wouldn't call me weak, & then one night over dinner my parents were like "dude his parents told us he complained about u bullying him, what the f**k." needless to say, the "friendly horseplay fun" stopped soon after as i felt completely awful. dementedsockpuppet
Pain Travels....
I bullied some kid in middle school. He was a nice kid but kinda geeky. An easy target in other words. It's no excuse, but I was being tormented by my older brother and my mom refused to do anything to stop him. Anywho, I would pick on him and it wasn't until some teachers and my friends pointed it out to me. I wish I could go back in time and kick my own butt. I actually thought about messaging him on FB to apologize but I chickened out. casino_night
Sorry Aidan....
I think the worst I've ever done was back in 3rd grade. There was a kid who got angry really easily and also lied a lot. Looking back on it I think he was just lonely and had minor anger issues, but my friends and I liked to call him out on his stuff constantly and make fun of him, which obviously only made it worse.
I still feel bad about it and I have no idea where he went after elementary school.
Aidan, if you're out there I'm sorry. From me and the other guys too, we didn't have it particularly good either once middle school started and I know how you feel now. LittleHuzzahGuy
Self-Actualization...
Giphy
My friends and I used to make fun of and torment the kids who were a bit younger than us who we thought were "annoying." Only looking back we all realized what jerks we were. RekNepZ
**** rolls down hill....
Bullying was systematic in my school - a relic of the English prep school fagging culture. I was part of a continuum. The older boys bullied me, I bullied the younger boys. It was expected.
They've washed that out of the school culture now. A catalyst was a speech by a single student. He stood up in assembly (as School Captain) a few years ago and spoke about his experience of bullying as a gay student. Changed a lot of attitudes. HandsomeLakitu
I need to Eat...
I was being starved at my house regularly by my mother. When you go long enough without eating you get desperate. I was poor but a lot of kids at my school would get money from their parents to buy snacks out of the vending machine. I use to beat kids up and take their money so I could get pop tarts from the vending machine so I could feed myself when my mom wouldn't let me eat.
I was the most hated kid in my school and kids were terrified of me. Before I started beating people up, I tried asking for people to buy me food but they either only had enough for them or told me no, so I did what I had to do to eat. Cannabilistichokie
I was Blind....
I thought everyone hated me, and thought it didn't matter what I did or said. Didn't really realize it was me being a bully, I was young and stupid. I think a lot of it was self centered, thinking that people should have liked me and they when they didn't, leaned really hard into not being liked. Looking back I'm sure there were plenty of reasons I didn't get along with people in the first place, or maybe they didn't hate me and I just couldn't see that. mindovermountains
I wish you well....
She was about 3 years younger and claimed I hit her. I had not. I denied it. I was given detention for a month. The whole thing was odd. The principal every day asked me if I hit her and I kept saying no. My parents kept getting calls about it. My teachers kept asking me. One month of me saying I never stroke her and them asking me again and again to confess. I still can't make heads or tails of it. Detention didn't bother me much. I thought the whole thing was a waste of time.
No idea. I didn't know her well before that and kept my distance for the next few years from her after that. I sometimes think that maybe I had bumped into her or something and she thought I had hit her on purpose other times I think that she was just a kid and wanted to see what would happen if she made a story up.
In any case she described me as a bully and that is my side of the story I am confused. Hope your life is going well. low_penalty
Sometimes it's earned...
Giphy
I never actually bullied anyone but I did beat this one kid up a bit, my grandad had died 2 days ago and this little f**ker came and starts taunting me singing "your grandads dead" so I kicked the little fool in the crotch, several times. MarkGimmeTheZuc
I'm sorry 'C'
I was in 5th grade, only had 1 friend. My friend and this guy were getting close, and having had someone try to cut me off from this friend before, I was scared. So I teased him, laughed at him, even pushed him once on a field trip. It all caught up when a mutual friend caught up to me while I was running laps in PE and said 'C thinks you're bullying him.'
I had to drop out of the class because I was crying so hard, I felt awful. I've since apologized multiple times, he's somehow forgiven me, and he's a wonderful person that I still see around school. trash_tm
Not so sorry....
Giphy
I only bullied a kid because he bullied me to such an extent I had to get therapy and my mental health was plummeting. I grew to be bigger than him and I saw it as an opportunity. TBH I loved every second of it and he got to experience what I felt. I still haven't recovered from my mental health scare but I realize how much of a fool move it was to do that but a part of me still doesn't feel bad for him. Urnanhasmitochondria
Not Social...
I used to be one of those kids that just follows the bully around and agrees with everything they say. For a long time I just called people names and talked down to them. I never hit anybody or anything, but I could be pretty cruel. I grew up on food stamps, but lived in a rich neighborhood because my grandparents so gratefully "took us in" (and then proceeded to lie and cheat about damn near everything for a long time, but thats another story).
I was constantly surrounded by kids who got whatever they wanted, and i often felt i had little to no control. There were a lot of missed opportunities for me just because my family couldn't pay. I think shitting on other kids was one of the few things that gave me any confidence, but one day the bully i was friends with moved away, and i realized most kids didn't really like my presence. It set me back socially pretty far, and to this day i wish i could apologize to those kids, but at this point i can barely remember who it was i did that too. Witchy829
Even though you deserved it.....
A girl (classmate and ex best friend) used to bully me, talk about me behind my back and plotted all of my classmates against me and did anything she could to make me cry.
One day I exposed everything she had done and afterwards I bullied her for a while by saying how horrible she was to her face.
One time she cried and I felt so horrible about it that I never did it again. At the end of school I apologized and still feel horrible about what I did to this day because even though she was a vile person I never want to see that I've become someone equally as bad as her. belizzb
He was mean first....
He was actually a really mean kid, used to be friends with him before I realized how mean he was. Stuff advanced to him being teased by the whole class because he was such a d**k to everybody. I joined in on the whole thing, and now I realize it was kinda like bullying in retrospect, even if he earned the negative attention. Rex_Maztar27
Following the Lead.....
I wasn't really a bully but I was a pretty annoying/entitled b**ch back in middle school and it honestly didn't even hit me until a year or two ago (??), I had/have an entitled mother (to some degree) and I looked up to her as a kid so I guess I was just copying her actions. Chogisoo
Don't Lie....
I bullied a girl because i found out she told everyone that we were going out a couple years earlier when in fact we hadn't. Not physical bullying mind you, but verbally and emotionally. Which is just as bad. Things did not end well for her. hammerNspiKe
I was young....
Like many in the comments, I just didn't know what was right and wrong (I was really young). My teacher came up to me and told me that three parents had complained about me (I was 9). It made me really upset and I went home and cried about it. Didn't know who the kids were, all I know is that three different parents all came in and complained about me upsetting their children and to this day I still don't know what I did. TheRopster
My family is just weird...
I literally had no idea I was a bully. My family is pretty rough on each other but in a joking way. People make fun of each other constantly. It took me till I was about sixteen to realize other people didn't work like that and now that my generation is bringing SO's to family parties it's becoming more apparent how weird my family was. Theantsdisagree
I'm just bad.
Giphy
There is no story I just didn't like him. I usually just call him bad names and pushed him and get others to come on my side. but I remember one night when I suddenly hated myself and started crying. So I stopped bullying KMH69420
Bullying can create a cycle of resentment, even as adults we've all experienced something like a bully. So, it's important that we understand that they are people as well, and to try to stop them.