Calm down. Chill out. Relax. Take a deep breath. We're gonna get through this.
Except sometimes, we wont, because the other party is really taking this thing that you don't think is that deep seriously. Aren't you tired of it?
u/allboutryan asked Reddit:
What do people take way to seriously?
Here were some of those answers.
Vicarious Living
Youth sports. I went and saw a co-workers kid play hockey. He's 9. Adults were screaming, a fight broke out between parents, swearing at the refs, the whole 9 yards. My co-worker didn't participate, but wasn't fazed. I asked him what the deal was and he just said "this is the norm".
Sorry Susan, little Johnny isn't going to be the next Patrick Kane. He very well could be eventually, but it's not like the draft is next week.
More Parent Problems
Honestly children's safety. Helicopter parents who don't let their kids go outside with friends or freak out at every scrape or bruise are not helping their kids. Now that doesn't mean you should neglect children, just don't suffocate them. I've seen small children with machetes and they were well behaved, probably because of trust and social expectations.
Preach
Can't speak for everyone, but I can tell you I took my fears way too seriously in high school. Can't ask her out, she might say no. Can't make that joke, they might think I'm awkward. Can't go to that party, wear that shirt, can't can't can't.
I was so afraid of failing I guaranteed that I would fail. I never risked anything, never reached for anything. And when I finally realized what I'd done, I just made the same painful, awkward mistakes I'd feared later in life, in college, in young adulthood.
Experience is a long string of failures. Hopefully, you reflect on them and learn from them. Avoiding experience does not avoid failure. It delays it.
The World At Large
The opinions and actions of very, very small groups of people. You always see it reported in the more sensationalist media outlets: 'People outraged about...', followed by whatever decision a company has made this week. If you read the article, it's pretty much always a scant handful of people -- two at most -- who have managed to whip up a storm in a teacup, usually about nothing at all. The best advice I every heard when it comes to keeping things like this in perspective is to imagine that the plural noun in phrases like this -- you know, 'Scientists now think that...' or 'People are claiming that...' or 'Mothers all around the country are outraged by...' -- can be replaced by 'Two dudes in Iowa'.
'Two dudes in Iowa now think that global warming might be overblown' is not a news story.
Kidz!
As a former Special Educator: teachers, many teachers, take "disrespectful behavior" too seriously.
I dealt with quite a few authoritarian teachers myself when I was young.
- I don't think it's OK for children to be rude or cruel to their teachers or elders. I put "disrespectful behavior" in scare quotes because I was referring to those situations when the child (keep in mind these are children) means no harm and/or is unaware of or can't control his/her behavior.
- I have immense respect for teachers and the profession of teaching. In my 6 years as a Special Education teacher working with students who have autism or emotional disabilities, I met dozens of teachers and almost all of them were wonderful people. Better than me, in fact, because I got emotionally and psychologically exhausted and couldn't hack it anymore.
- The person I described in subsequent posts is a cruel tyrant. She consistently uses fear to keep her students "in line (i.e. silent)". All teachers lose their temper sometimes. That's human.
- I think an adult should not take the things a 5th grader says/does personally. Even if you do have to discipline them, keep some perspective. We all made our share of dumb decisions as kids. That's what kids do.
- Thank you to all the parents of children with disabilities who support the work of special educators and work with them. You are the real MVPs.
If It Works, It Works
Brands that they use. For example, some car guys are either all BMW or all Benz and act like their car brand is inherently superior to others. Same with snowmobiles, dirt bikes, trucks etc...
All the different varieties lead to innovation and have their own pluses and minuses.
It's TOXIC™
Knocks to their "masculinity". I know far too many people that are missing out on great movies like Paddington 2 or Spirited Away because they're not traditionally masculine movies. And that's just a tiny little example, some folk get WAY overboard about stuff like that.
A Frisbee By Any Other Name
Frisbees
I was on travel for work last week and my hotel was across the street from a park with a Frisbee golf course (excuse me, a "disc golf course"). Since I had some free time one afternoon, I bought a six dollar Wham-O Frisbee and went over to enjoy a beautiful sunny day and play a few holes. Multiple, multiple people felt compelled to tell me that my discs were not regulation. Who the f-ck cares? I'm not competing for prize money. My cheap Frisbee wasn't damaging the course. Go away and mind your own damn business!
Calm Thyself
First Person Shooters and Multiplayer Online Battle Arenas. I have a couple friends that are great to hang out with in person but they are so toxic the minute anything goes wrong in a game. Yelling, blaming, rage quitting, bossing others around, etc. Its just a game guys, winning is fun but id rather lose with fun people than win with certain people at this point.
Meta
On reddit? Everything.
Reddit has an obsession with snarky responses and a "Actually..." mentality.
Hell, even if your comment supports their opinion, they'll dig and search for grammar mistakes just for the sake of proving you wrong about something.
People Reveal The Most Disturbing Piece Of Information They've Learned About Someone They Know
You never know anyone quite as well as you think you do.
Even your closest friends and family members have a way of surprising you upon revealing something about their past, or their interests and hobbies.
Sometimes, however, surprised doesn't even begin to cover how you feel about what you just learned.
Some people are so good at covering up sad, dark, even despicable elements of their lives, that you would never have known had you not somehow found out yourself.
Even if it's debatable whether or not you're better off knowing this information.
"What's the most disturbing piece of information you've found out about someone you've known personally?"
Never Who You Might Expect
"Years ago, I became very close with a manager of mine and we hung out after work pretty often."
"He seemed like a genuinely great guy."
"He moved back to his hometown years later and we kept in touch on Facebook until he just stopped responding."
"Then I went to try to message him again and his profile was gone."
"I decided to google him, half expecting to find an obituary or something but instead I found out he was charged with some sh*t and in jail."
"I never got any kind of weird vibes from him and I'm still shocked."- CocoTandy
Shocking Associations
"I know a girl from my hometown who would have Skype calls with Ian Watkins (lost prophets) horrific man."
"The Skype calls involved her child."- vapekittenx
Doesn't Make Him Any Less Guilty
"My uncle on my dad's side of the family was an accomplice of a murder in the 80’s."
"He didn’t make the kill, but he helped the murder take place."
"Found out by my mom last year."- X0vel
Old Habits Die Hard
"When I was about 12 my family found out that my dad cheated on my mom, as well as every other ex-wife he had before her."
'Now, years later, women still recognize my mom as the one who was married to that one awful guy."
"One woman met her in a bar and ended up telling her stories about how my dad would stalk her again and again."
"Once she even had to call her own dad to escort him off their property because he wouldn’t leave."
'All of this happened while he was married to my mom."- Ryry_Duppie
There Are No Words...
"He honestly believed he was God's chosen representative on Earth, and therefore, no one was allowed to defy him or God would allow him to punish him."
"As you can guess, he was charged with domestic battery several times, and got into a lot of fights (he usually lost, he was obese, and couldn't move very fast)."
"He was stalking some poor woman, and he showed up at her house and demanded she leave her husband and come with him as God had given her to him as his slave, and he tried to force his way in, and she shot and killed him."
"We're a castle doctrine state, so she didn't get in any trouble."- Local64bithero
Stockholm Syndrome?
"In my teens I knew a guy recently out of prison."
"There was another guy in the neighborhood who everyone hated."
"He would just cruise the block in his car because anytime he stayed anywhere too long, people would confront him."
"Everyone hated this guy."
"Prison guy was in his late teens, guy everyone hated was in his early twenties and dating a girl who I believe was sixteen."
"Not long after getting out prison guy got into it with the guy everyone hated."
"It wasn't difficult, the guy was just incapable of acting in a way that didn't make you want to punch him."
"But he couldn't fight so he'd make himself scarce and then good luck finding him."
"But prison guy wasn't giving up so easily so he kidnapped the other guy's girlfriend."
"Nothing cinematic he just went by her school and got her in a car then told her she wasn't allowed to leave until her boyfriend showed up."
"Boyfriend, not one to back down from a scumbag contest, told her she's on her own."
"In the end the girl ended up dating prison guy."
"I don't even know who the story is about anymore."
"They were all very unique people."- MrFunktasticc
Refused To Believe Her
"My grandfather was a very big/loved name in my local community, and after he died my grandmother revealed that he was very abusive."
"It only became more disturbing when everyone cut her off because they loved him so much they refused to believe her."- MediaGullible282
Gave Away A Little Too Much?
"A random former acquaintance got very drunk in front of me and heavily insinuated that he had gotten away with murder several years earlier as an enforcer in a street gang."- stoplightdrop
Manipulating People's Compassion
"This is probably tame compared to others on here but my ex-best-friend lied about having brain cancer for 2 years."
"She also impersonated drs to verify her story to the people she was lying to."- SpeckledCloud
Why, One Wonders...
"I’ve worked w two people who faked pregnancies."
'One was a guy who said his girlfriend was pregnant and wasn’t dragged that on for months."
"Another was a woman who said she was pregnant and dragged it on for months and months until our employers caught on."- elizscott1977
Currying Favor Doesn't Always Work...
"That a close relative was only being nice to me because they would Inherit my belongings after I died."
"Let's just say that side of the relatives don't exist for me anymore."- No-Power1377
It's truly unsettling how good some people are at hiding their true selves.
Making you wonder if you can really trust anyone...
If you or someone you know experienced sexual assault, help is out there. You can reach the RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline by calling 1-800-656-4673, use their Live Chat tool: https://www.rainn.org/get-help, or visit the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s website.
In Canada, help is available through the Ending Violence Association of Canada website.
International resources can be found through the Rape Crisis Network Europe website.
We can't be brilliant every second of every day.
Even the Mensa-level brains that walk among us have their off moments.
It is inescapable.
Sometimes IQ doesn't matter.
Redditor SnooTomatoes1254 wanted hear about the times the brightest of us may have come across as the dimmest, so they asked:
"What's the best example of a smart person being incredibly stupid you've ever experienced?"
Nobody is perfect.
Even with a bunch of brain cells.
Remote
"Our physics professor once had held a remote lecture without turning his Google Meet on. So he just spoke to the computer for 1.5 hours."
PhilosopherActive677
Wash Away
"I used to work at a chemical engineering plant. One day I was in the kitchen washing my glasses with a drop of dish soap and one of the lead engineers said I shouldn’t wash my glasses like that. I asked him why not and he responded that I will wash the prescription off."
Otherwise-Archer
"While he’s dumb, you could wash off any coatings on your glasses, making them more susceptible to glare, fogging, and other bad things."
xpsKING
Class is in Session
"Oh, I almost forgot about this one! When I was in my final year of physics at University, we had a professor who would get very irritated at the pull string for the projection screen, as it would dangle down in front of the whiteboard."
"Every morning, he would spend a good couple minutes attempting to throw the weight on the end over the light fixture above the whiteboard, taking anywhere from 5 to 30 tries each time. All the students would give tips and encouragement, and this became a kind of inside joke for the class of how long it would take every morning."
"Months go by, and one day near the end of the quarter, we end up with a substitute. The sub goes to the board and, without hesitation, grabs the string and hooks it over a thumbtack stuck in the cork at the top of the whiteboard."
"The entire class literally gasped in unison! The sub whirled around, asking what happened, and the whole class just starts laughing. Eventually, someone explained what happened, and we all had a good laugh that an entire class of physics majors never even thought of that solution, let alone noticed that the tack had always been there for that purpose."
Jackthebodyless
Leading to Tragedy
"My brother-in-law had a Masters degree in Physics and Maths. He was a teacher at a high school. He had a new house built. He thought he would save money by nailing on the drywall (sheetrock, Gib board). He managed to put nails through a hot water pipe and the wiring."
"By the time he'd paid a plumber and electrician to fix up the mess it cost a lot more."
CyanHakeChill
Forward
"University physics professor at a Hyundai dealership arguing with a tech telling him about the noise in his car. The professor was freaking out saying he couldn't even understand what the tech was trying to say, because the tech said 'centrifugal force,' instead of 'Centripetal force.'"
"The conversation could not move forward. It was weird."
Bamcanadaktown
Hyundais came be dangerous. Now we know why.
I need a Check-Up
"My doctor. During the period of my life in which I was dating my ex gf my doctor would INSIST every time I saw him that I needed to be on birth control because it was responsible to be preventing pregnancy. No matter how many times I told him that I was in a monogamous relationship with a woman he would still keep asking. I guess it it just didn’t compute."
_shes_a_jar
In the Rain
"My sister has been driving her bf's truck for a year. We get in the truck to go somewhere, she says wait, I need to go in the house to get a paper towel to dry off the windshield. I say, why don't you use the wipers? She says, I don't know how. I ask, what do you do when it rains? Answer: I stay home."
KnittingGoonda
Stripped and Unplugged
"I worked IT at a university. We got a call saying a printer would not turn on. The particular person who called was a very steriotypical, 'I have a doctorate I know all the things,' kind of person. Anyway, I get to the classroom and they show me the printer proclaiming they checked everything including the power strip, unplugged it, plugged it back in and all that. They were very irate and rude the whole time I was there."
"While I was looking it over they were getting more upset because they had already checked the power cables and they were fine. Without saying anything I unplugged the power strip from itself, plugged it into the wall then turned on the printer and just walked out."
thedubstepper9000
Conclusions
"My father in law is very intelligent. He taught himself how to solve a rubics cube without looking anything up and is generally a genius in math, logic, puzzles what have you. He believes dinosaurs couldn't be real because they would be too big for their skeletons to uphold their weight. He has lots of other really stupid ideas because he is so intelligent he thinks he can just reason himself into correct conclusions without doing research or adhering to the scientific process."
BakedBeanW*ore
Grass Issues
"Well, my cousin who has two freaking masters degrees in finance and economics, put his hand in still spinning lawnmower to help it blow out rest of grass faster. He lost a finger."
"I asked why he didn’t wait till it stopped completely."
"He said it was just in a hurry."
toywars
I've never trusted a lawnmower.
And now, neither should you.
Coming out is never easy.
Even in this day and age it comes with a touch of drama.
Of course we have to acknowledge how society has come a long, LOOOONG way with this topic.
The LGBTQ+ community of today definitely has a more welcoming world to announce themselves to.
But the truth is, it's still an intimate experience one must come to terms with.
And there is always that moment when... you know.
No matter your age, you still have the A-HA realization.
Redditor Haunting-Golf9761 was hoping everyone would be willing to share some intimate life secrets, by asking:
"Gay people of Reddit, what was the moment it clicked 'Yeah I’m gay?'"
I knew after an intimate evening with a woman.
It all just... made sense.
HER
"Looked at a girl and thought 'If I was a guy, I'd date her,' and realized I didn't need to be a guy to date her. I was not brave enough to speak to that girl though."
PeachLeech
THE GRIP
"2018 summer olympics. Realized I had been watching men's water polo, alone, for eight hours."
FallenFae
"I don't know why but this made me laugh. I’d watch men’s Polo, Diving, and Swimming and get amped. But like, I’d also be drooling over abs and butts."
shark_food31
"Lmfao this absolutely tracks. I'm bi AF and was OBSESSED with couples skating because everybody was so God da**ed beautiful and the chemistry was off the chain 🤣. The Olympics had a chokehold GRIP on me as a teen."
Lucky_Ranger
I Get It Now
"I'm bi, but I realized I wasn't straight while watching the Lizzie McGuire Movie when I was like 8-9. I was in the backseat on a long car ride watching on my portable DVD player. There's a scene near the end where Lizzie is on stage singing and the camera shot is behind her. I remember pausing the movie and staring at her butt for a good while wondering why it made me feel a certain way. A few years later I found my uncle's playboy magazines and it suddenly all made sense."
lovexnxpeacexox
"An episode of Star Trek the Next Generation where they showed Riker’s hairy chest. I learned not only that I was gay, but a lot about my specific type of gay."
Santos_L_Halper_II
Gays in space. We're everywhere.
Oh My
"I'm not gay but Bi with a heavy female lean. I always thought some guys were cute, heard of Grindr went on and hooked up with one I thought was cute."
Milestailsprowe
Thanks, He-Man...
"When I was really really young I used to have erotic dreams with guys (thanks, He-Man), but didn't think much about it. That's when the internal conflicts started."
"I knew I needed to be married to a woman and have family just like every man in my family did. I feared being singled out, because I lived in a retrograde place where honor killings were common. There were no homosexual s in my family, why me? By the age of 15, I had abandoned the idea of marrying a woman and keeping homosexual affairs as some people do and decided to be upfront with me parents."
"I told them I was gay, and they seemed to take somewhat well. Deep down, they did not."
"It took years for them to truly accept me, but I can say that I have a good life. Not the one that was envisioned for me all those years ago."
Hideyohubby
The Literature
"I was 8 when my brother (6 years older) was recording the last Nirvana concert and I said David Grohl was cute. I didn't really know what it meant to be attracted to someone, but I was drawn to him and the words just came out. My brother said 'That means you're GAY!!!!' which I didn't understand what gay was yet but his tone made me respond 'Nuh uh!!!'"
"Turns out he was right. When I was 13ish I found my brother's porn magazines and found myself uninterested in the ones that were just women. That's probably when it fully dawned on me. Still kept it to myself until I was in college and out of my small rural hometown."
Mathandyr
Back in the Day
"Looking back, I definitely had feelings for women just as much as I did men. I just either didn't realize or was in denial about it. I was 20 when a girl crush really hit me hard and I started to realize it but was still confused for some time. Finally around age 24 I came out to my brother as bi, and much to my relief he did as well!"
Ohhhhhhthehumanity
Breathless
"My senior year of high school, Titanic was re-released in 3D for the 100 year anniversary of the disaster. Being my favorite movie of all time, my dad took me to see it at the closest IMAX theater."
"I caught myself trying to control my breathing during the nude drawing scene so that my dad didn’t catch on to the fact that I was super into seeing Kate Winslet’s breasts in towering 3D."
wildflowerhonies
Who doesn't love Titanic.
We thank these brave souls for sharing their stories.
Do you have something similar to share? Let us know in the comments below.
We can all agree here that the dating life can be really hard to put up with, but we have to admit that dating also has its moments.
And sometimes those moments are cool enough to lead to a second date.
Redditor EmCWolf13 asked:
"What is a 'green flag' you've experienced on a first date that made you want to have a second date?"
Reliving Memories
"On our third date, we watched a movie at his place. He remembered that on our first date, I ordered a Dr. Pepper with my meal and a chocolate chip cookie for dessert."
"He had Dr. Pepper for me in the fridge and made me homemade chocolate chip cookies."
"He burned them but I married him two years later anyways."
- cassiecas88
A Solid Tipper
"When my girlfriend and I had our first date, her mom sent her with 50 bucks (just in case I made her pay, I guess)."
"Since I paid, she made the waiter cry by tipping him the whole 50 bucks; apparently, he was having a bad day."
- therealandy04
Feeling Celebrated
"We had been dating about six months and she showed up at my apartment with a homemade cake on my birthday."
"It might sound like no big deal to some people, but I had never dated a girl who cared about my birthday. I almost dropped to my knees and cried when I opened the door."
- DuckFan_87
Valuing Someone Else's Time
"She was an hour late. However, the entire time, she was texting me updates and telling me what she was doing to get there. We are going to be celebrating our one-year anniversary on 1/1."
- Rabidleopard
Puppy-Approved
"She came to my door, and my puppy got excited. Without skipping a beat, she scooped up the dog, and asked where the THREE of us were going."
"That was 19 years ago. Puppy is gone but we've stuck together through h*ll and back."
- Civilian216
They Clicked
"Sense of humor and feeling safe."
"I was living in Reno, Nevada at the time and this is my current relationship. The first date we went to downtown Reno to Hot August Nights. We walked through the event, viewing all the hot rod cars, and for dinner, we went to Subway."
"He is easy to talk to, and very funny. We took the bus from downtown to midtown viewing all the hot rods. Walked from midtown to my apartment in south Reno. Was the best night of my life so far. I love him so much."
- SnooCakes6773
The Little Things
"She appreciates all the small things. Biggest green flag."
- Ipalayhir_
Like an Old Friend
"We met up for park beers on our first date. From the get-go, things just felt natural. The conversation flowed, we laughed, and it felt more like meeting with an old friend than a first date. When it got dark, she brought me back to hers to meet her cat (no innuendo, we waited for a few dates to bang, and I just really love cats)."
"We didn't plan to, but we met up the next day. And the next. Took her to a family BBQ two weeks in, and they loved her. That easy, natural feeling never left. And right now her cat (now our cat) is screaming at me for dinner."
- maxhax
A Giving Spirit
"Not the first date, but the moment I knew I was gonna marry this man... We went grocery shopping."
"It was about 9 PM, and we had both just been paid. The young lady in line in front of us had a very young baby and was paying with WIC coupons and a food stamp EBT card."
"Her total came to about $22, and she was holding a $20. She looked dejected and put back the one and only thing that was probably her splurge, a candy bar and an energy drink."
"Other than that, she had baby food, diapers, chicken, rice, bananas, formula, wipes, the bare minimum."
"I turned around to tell my now-husband to hand me my wallet."
"I didn't have to. He already had his out, took out a $50 bill, handed it to her, and told her to keep the change. He changed her week, he changed my life. That was THE moment I knew he was it for me."
- KknhgnInepaOcnB11
An Extended Date
"We met in a nightclub, I took him home for some fun and games. When we woke up and had breakfast, he said, 'What would you like to do today?' instead of just leaving his number and doing the dash."
"We’ve been together for 27 years and married for 15 of them, and we’ve almost never spent a night apart."
- SpeakingOutOfTurn
Comfortable Silences
"First date, she was driving us to a spot to go hiking, about an hour’s drive. We’re talking and talking, but every once in a while we wouldn’t be talking, and it just felt so comfortable and not awkward being silent together."
- kamuelak
Pay It Forward
"First date with my now wife. Had plans to go to a fancy Italian restaurant. I show up a bit early, dressed as nice as my wardrobe allows, a couple of drinks before she gets there."
"But anyway she arrives and we enjoy dinner, drinks, appetizers, and dessert. The works."
"Anyway when it’s time for the check the waitress comes over and says, 'A person who prefers to remain anonymous picked up y'all tab and told me to tell y’all to continue to enjoy the night.'"
"We were both shocked. I wasn’t keeping tabs but this was an expensive meal we just had. I tipped well of course and I thought to myself the only reason anyway would do that is they say an obvious first date unfolding and thought we were cute/happy/genuine or something."
"We both felt pretty special. Been married for three years. Together for 8. We eventually paid it forward to another young couple years later."
"Total boss move by the way. Definitely feel good about yourself."
- _Ryman_
Onward!
"We stayed at the wine bar much longer than planned, and we were trying to race to a restaurant for food before places closed. So, I offered her a piggyback ride to run it, due to her wearing heels. She jumped on, threw her arm forward, and yelled, 'Onward!'"
"We didn't make it to the restaurant in time, but did end up at the nearby diner for a few more hours. Been married just passed 3 years now, and leaving for our honeymoon (FINALLY, thanks to the pandemic), in 10 hours."
- Devlin7
Clear Intentions
"He made it clear it was a date and that he was interested without it ever feeling creepy or like he was pressuring me for anything."
"We talked for hours, went from restaurant to walking up and down the river to my place for a beer, then I offered for him to stay over but on a mattress on the floor (I was in a studio with no couch), not in my bed and he wasn’t pushy about anything more happening."
"The first few weeks he was always sweet and respectful but made it so clear that he was interested in a relationship, no back and forth or second guessing. And now we’re married!"
- pincho_de_tortilla
An Easy Bet
"A two-hour date that felt like five minutes. At the end of it she made some silly bet with me that she said if she lost, she’d go out with me again. And of course, she lost."
"It was about eight green flags."
- coyote-1
All of these stories are sweet and sure to leave a smile on someone's face.
Sometimes dating is really easy, and when it comes to seeing a future with someone, sometimes you just know.
Do you have similar dating experiences? Let us know in the comments below.