You can predict a lot about a parent from a kid.
[rebelmouse-image 18348500 is_animated_gif=And teachers often have to deal with both in a very concentrated fashion. Unfortunately teachers tend to get the brunt of the blame, always. And user u/TheLegend1125 asked Reddit to share their own horror stories:
Teachers, what was the worst parent/teacher interview you've ever had to sit through?
Here were some of the craziest horror stories.
When The Dog Bites
[rebelmouse-image 18348501 is_animated_gif=Pre-school teacher here. My first year as a lead teacher I had a student who bit, scratched, pulled hair, slapped and punched both students and teachers, including myself. Every day we were essentially beaten up by this 4 year old. Leading up to the conference my boss advised me to keep a log of everything this child was doing, each time he slapped or bit someone, each time he yelled out a cuss word, etc.
The entire conference was this child's mom going through my behaviour log of her child and laughing. She told me that he had never exhibited that kind of behaviour and was a perfect angel. She told me she had never even seen him angry. She laughed in our faces.
Minutes later, the child's grandmother, whom the parent and child lived with, called the school and told me all the things she knew her daughter wouldn't, which included the child giving the grandmother bruises, banging her head into her headboard, dropping books on her feet, biting, scratching, pulling, and punching both his mom and the grandmother.
Poor Thing
[rebelmouse-image 18348502 is_animated_gif=I was senior management at a private school and we had some insane helicopter parents who insisted their 4 year old daughter was a genius. They wanted her fast tracked THREE grades ahead. Nobody could reason with them and they carried this big binder of 'tests' they'd paid for to prove their case. Now, she was a sweet kid but very shy and _seriously _afraid of failure. Huge red flags to be honest. They were at the point of suing us and I drew the short straw for talking them off the ledge. It was last day of the school year, my own kids were waiting for us to start the holidays (they went to the same school) and I was stuck for two hours with them, trying to persuade that them that they were damaging their child and that moving an already nervy little kid away from the few playmates she had would be catastrophic. I went through every test paper, used every tactic I could think of and eventually called the meeting to a close on an 'agree to disagree' basis - but refusing to move her higher up.
The next day, first day of the holidays, my Director got an entire transcript of the conversation which they'd secretly recorded and a demand to have me fired. They must have stayed up all night as it was before auto transcribe tech was available.
My Director called in the lawyers and I had to forward all the slanderous emails they kept sending me in case of court action. We had an internal tribunal with them when school opened after the holidays and they lost their case. We never saw them again as they moved out of the area. I often think about that little girl and hope she's doing ok. :(
Abuse Begets Abuse
[rebelmouse-image 18345581 is_animated_gif=I remember as a kid I went to a parent-teacher conference with my dad for my older brother. He went to a pretty bad high school in a rough area. So for one of the classes, the mother ahead of us goes with her son. Her son was this big, scary looking, gangster kid (this is the mid nineties in NYC). The teacher looks up at them and says, "I'm sorry I have no idea who he is. He's never shown up to class and cuts everyday."
The mom turns her head and looks at the son and I see him go from having this smug, nonchalant attitude to having the fear of God suddenly on his face. The mom takes an umbrella and starts beating the kid right in front of the teacher. The teacher gets immediately flustered, but has no idea what to do. The kid starts apologizing profusely to his mom and to the teacher. His mom then grabs him by the ear (she's at least a couple inches shorter than him) and drags him out of the classroom. The whole time the kid is just saying he's sorry.
Expensive Conflict
[rebelmouse-image 18348503 is_animated_gif=I was a teacher at a private tutoring company that catered to children with Autism and dyslexia who had major problems with reading. It was expensive, like $140 an hour, and children were required to do at least 4 hours a day, 5 days a week. It comes out to like $2k a week. Anyway, I was sitting in one of the p/t conferences with some of the admins, and the conference turned from their child's progress to how they were going to pay for it. It was horrifying to hear, that these parents are planning on taking a second mortgage out on their house, that they've sold some jewelry...this damned company was driving people into the ground, financially. I quit about two weeks later.
Difficulty
[rebelmouse-image 18346830 is_animated_gif=My wife's first teaching job was at a rural high school. Most of the parents couldn't be located or contacted, so it was a miracle when they would show up for parent/teacher conferences.
One student, the oldest of 6, had not turned in any work and failed every test. It took several attempts, but his parents were finally able to come in. My wife met with them and her principal joined her as I guess this family had a history in the town.
My wife expressed her concern for the kid's future and his goals beyond school. The parents screamed at her and the principal saying they were successful with out a high school diploma and didn't believe their kid needed to be here. The only reason they were making him go was because CPS had threatened to take him away from them.
Kids Don't Always Take After Their Folks
[rebelmouse-image 18348504 is_animated_gif=I had a model student conference after two really tough conferences, so I was looking for a breath of fresh air and assumed his parents were as awesome as their child. I was wrong. They had decided to get a divorce right before conferences. They spent the entire conference arguing over who would have to take their child. More than once in my career I wanted to adopt a child, and this tops the list. I saw him a few years later and he was the same confident, thoughtful, intelligent kid.
College Moms
[rebelmouse-image 18348505 is_animated_gif=I had to inform them that it wasn't in fact a parent/teacher conference.
Student asked to meet to discuss his recent exam grade. Cool. He shows up basically being dragged in by his mom, who proceeds to rant at me for a solid 5 minutes about how unfair the test must be because "her special little guy" (her words) couldn't possibly deserve a C.
He was a junior in college and I was his TA.
When she finally let me speak, I informed her that I didn't meet with parents and it was actually against regulations for me to discuss his grades with her, and asked her to leave. She hit the roof, started screaming and tearing up his exam, and was eventually escorted out by campus security.
How?
[rebelmouse-image 18348506 is_animated_gif=Lets see, there are 3 that come to mind.
First, it was heavily implied I was racist (I'm black, and was teaching at an all black school), and the parent said "God would get me for my behavior"
There was the one where I basically offered almost irrefutable proof this kid cheated on a test. (It was a math test, he showed no work, had all the right answers to a different version of the test, and you couldn't even get those answers with the numbers provided). She said quote "You say he cheated, he says he didn't, I don't know who to believe"
Finally, and this was both bad and good. A mom basically was blaming me for her kids bad grades (as happens fairly often). I actually really liked the kid, he was just lazy. He jumped in the conversation and said "Mom, don't blame Mr. Illini02, you never make me do any homework at home". That pissed her off, but she couldn't really say much more.
Isn't It True That...
[rebelmouse-image 18345618 is_animated_gif=Parent was a lawyer and wanted to grill me as if I were on the witness stand. Based on that encounter, I'm not sure they were a very good lawyer.
Complaints
[rebelmouse-image 18348507 is_animated_gif=Kid refused to do any work or take tests. She was failing, obviously. Said the work was too hard (it was a third year Spanish honors course for those going onto dual enrollment college course senior year).
Her father was insistent that he come in to learn the material that he would then teach his daughter. I was really thrown by that one. Took about twenty minutes to convince him that the arrangement would be unsustainable.
English Kla$$
[rebelmouse-image 18348509 is_animated_gif=I used to teach senior English for ten years. It was pretty much the only class anyone had to absolutely take senior year, unless they were behind on their 3 math or science courses. The course was specifically British Literature and I tried to make it as interesting as possible for students. I tried to challenge students and prepare them for college-level work, but I also allowed students to turn in late assignments for points off (my district also unofficially required us to accept late work, as failed students=less funding.)
I posted all assignments on the class website for all students to access in the event of an absence, held tutorial once a week, updated my online grades weekly, and contacted parents when students were failing. I did all of this, because in the event a student fails, you have to provide supporting documentation that you tried to help them.
Every year, I had two or three male students (I don't know why it was usually guys) who wouldn't complete any assignments. These kids usually had overbearing mothers who would constantly harass me and find every excuse in the book to present some fault of mine to my principal as reasoning their son shouldn't be failing. These parents' usual excuse was that they "didn't know" their kid was failing, despite the access to online grades, my phone calls, letters home, etc.
On one such occasion I was called into a meeting with a mother a month prior to graduation. Her son had failed first semester and I was a bit surprised to see her, because she had been fairly nonchalant in our previous phone calls, saying things like, "If he fails, that's on him." Well, this lady pulled out the big guns for this Hail Mary meeting.
She first said I never called her and she didn't know her son was failing. I presented my documentation on our phone calls and quoted what she said, word for word. She then stated that I was too tough on students and wanted to fail her son. I reminded her that I hold weekly tutorial for students, post all assignments online AND give students time to work on assignments in class.
Then, she went on about not knowing her son failed first semester until it was "Too late," because his report card was sent to the wrong address. My principal pulled up their information and read back the address. She commented, "Yeah, that's my sister's house." My principal asked her for her current address and she gave it. He paused, then said, "Ma'am, your address is outside of our attendance zone."
Realizing the mistake she made, the lady got quiet for a moment then snapped, "(My son) will make up all of the work he owes for your class and attend every tutorial for the remainder of the year," and he did.
Illiterate Fashion
[rebelmouse-image 18344987 is_animated_gif=I work in public school education with a nonprofit organization. Sitting in a parent-teacher conference with the principal of the school, mom, and the kid. The kid is in 5th grade. The principal tells the mom point blank that her child can't read, which is true. The kid could barely write his own name and couldn't read anything except basic sight words. The mom laughed and said "my kid doesn't need to know how to read, he wears Polo."
I was speechless. I had no idea a parent could be that ignorant. I still think about that kid every few days and how hard his mom is making his life.
Kelvin Ain't Just A Temp
[rebelmouse-image 18345539 is_animated_gif=Was grading tests for a teacher while there was a parent/teacher conference going on (the teacher asked the parents beforehand if I could be there as the kid was three years younger than me and I didn't know him) They are talking for a bit and I start to notice the teacher pronouncing it "Kevin" and the parents are adding an "L", "kelvin", but I assume ya an accent or something. The parents start to become very dramatic, going on and on about how the teacher needed to go to the kid outside of class to make sure they were doing their homework (ugh) and such, and at the end the teacher stands up to show the parents a piece of writing from the student. Parents take it and read, look at each other and say to the teacher "this is someone named Kevin, our son is KeLvin", then proceed to get very upset with the teacher because he wasn't their child's actual teacher, when THEY were the ones who came into HIS classroom to talk about their son. It nearly made me pass out repressing my laughter before they left
F For Flirting
[rebelmouse-image 18348510 is_animated_gif=I was a substitute teacher then. Special needs class, so there was more meetings with parents than normally. Normally I just saw the mom, she would pick up her kid on Fridays. She was a little bit demanding and stuck up, but nothing I couldn't handle. Talked really badly about her husband when we had parent teacher meeting and when I called to tell what happened during the day (some people think these meetings/phone calls are their therapy sessions. Once she talked for 1.5 hours... I just didn't have the courage to make her stop). So her husband, child's father starts picking him up on Fridays. Okay, nothing unusual. Then he comes to the parent teacher meeting and starts asking what I do on my free time, am I seeing someone etc, just made me uncomfortable even though he didn't actually say anything rude or offensive. All this time his wife was sitting next to him!
Accidentally met him in a bar after that... He tried to buy me drinks and flirted with me. At that moment I realised he tried to flirt with me when his wife was sitting next to him in a parent teacher meeting.
B For Bad
[rebelmouse-image 18348511 is_animated_gif=High School teacher here ...
Had a parent teacher conference with two parents and their daughter. She had been achieving a steady "B" average in my course through her own efforts and hard work. She had long been a "classified" student, with a number of small issues that had caused her to struggle academically - until she matured and found ways of better managing her issues. I had her a a junior, and she was doing well in my challenging course - and seem proud of it. Then came the meeting. Her parents clearly had used the system as a way of providing their daughter with every academic advantage they could, bullying school staff along the way to create an academic plan that made it nearly impossible for the girl to not score a 95% or better in all her courses. I have never seen a plan so designed for academic success, with no intention whatsoever of helping the student develop the skills needed to survive in the world outside of school. I tried to make clear to them that she was doing very well in the course without the various supports in place, and that she was quite pleased with her accomplishments, but they could not care less. All they could focus on was the final grade being below their 95% expectation. We went back and forth for a while, with them presenting very angrily and with veiled threats. I did not back down, and the parents finally had her removed from my course. Luckily, my administration backed me - even complimenting on my willingness to stand against them as many had not before. The girl ended up taking the course over the summer in a far easier setting.
It was very disturbing to see parents so bent on their version of her success that they ignored the real progress she had made. They viewed the district as an enemy - an obstacle to navigate instead of an opportunity. I can only hope that the girl found her own path as she became an adult, but I can assure you that her parents hindered her growth and failed to give her the future they imagined for her.
Thanks, Obama
[rebelmouse-image 18348512 is_animated_gif=A student claimed bias in grading. She and her father later emailed me, the principal, the board of education, and Barack Obama. Obama was president at the time, but no, he didn't reply. Thanks, Obama.
Learned Behavior
[rebelmouse-image 18348513 is_animated_gif=I had a parent storm out of an IEP meeting because we wouldn't agree to put an aggressive student back in to a public school setting. We also had issues with the student running out of the school building and angrily stalking around the neighborhood when the slightest thing upset him. The parent just started crying and stormed out, yelling at us that he wouldn't be able to experience prom.
We all just looked at each other in realization that our student 100% had learned this behavior from his parent.
Displays Of Unkindness
[rebelmouse-image 18348514 is_animated_gif=As a student teacher, I was placed in a multi-age gifted & talented classroom (fifth and sixth grades.). My mentor teacher was phenomenal, loved by all and incredible at her job.
One little girl in our class just could not keep up. She was simply not at the level of advancement that the other kids were. She was a happy, mellow kid who didn't really care, but her mother pushed her super hard and refused to believe she wasn't the height of giftedness. At the conference, I witnessed this mother berate and blame this incredible teacher, including telling her all the other parents were taking about how bad she was (lies.) It ended with my mentor teacher having tears in her eyes. This woman did it all in front of her 11-year-old daughter, who was silently miserable the whole time.
Sacré Bleu
[rebelmouse-image 18348515 is_animated_gif=I used to teach year 4 (8-9 year olds) in London. There's a lot of immigrant families in the area I taught at and it made for a very interesting classroom. Unfortunately, due to the British curriculum, I had to teach a foreign language to my class and the school had chosen French as the language. Good for me, I speak it reasonably well and definitely well enough to teach 8 year olds how to say where they live and what they do at the weekend, not well enough to do parent-teacher meetings in French to all the Congolese parents from my class. Several of the children went home and told their parents how I spoke French. One dad in particular decided that he would only speak French to me and I had to try and tell him why his daughter wasn't doing as well as he expected in a language I don't speak fluently.
Sometimes you only need to experience something once, to know it's a never again situation.
I always say, try everything once.
Well, now that I'm older, a caveat to that is... try it all within reason.
How many things have we all walked away from saying the one time experience will suffice?
In fact, knowing when to say no is one of life's wisest choices.
Redditor Croakied wanted to discuss the times we've all said... "once was enough!" They asked:
"What is one thing that you will NEVER do again?"
Love. Did it. A few times. Moving on.
Stay Still
"Jump off a moving train."
DenseDriver6477
"My dad used to jump on a train when he was little to go to school. He broke his nose like twice doing it. He also would not recommend."
Darphon
“vaportini”
"Smoke alcohol. Me and my friends bought something called a 'vaportini' in college where you could pour alcohol into a bulb and after low heat separated the alcohol from the liquid, you could inhale it thru the glass straw you inserted into the bulb. Basically you got drunk directly into your bloodstream/brain and it never hit your stomach."
"If you did too much, your body wouldn’t make you vomit or something, there wouldn’t be a simple self regulation/safety measure. You’d just get alcohol poisoning. Felt very dangerous, the drunk wasn’t a regular drunk feeling. We used it once and were like okay, never again. I’d be surprised if you could still buy it, although it would be incredibly easy to replicate at home."
michelangelho
It’s heartbreaking...
"Fall in love with a drug addict."
Rains_Lee
"Good call, don’t do it. The drugs will always come first. Can’t go out unless their 'ok' with how much drugs they have and money left over if any, cant make love unless they have their fix for the night and even still it never feels normal, can’t trust them after the lies to get drugs and the manipulation they put you through, and you can’t change them no matter how much you try and wish they would. It’s heartbreaking."
Cvilla411
More me time...
"Give up my life for work. F**k going the extra mile for a place that doesn't value you and pays you crap even though you go the extra mile for them. You have 1 life with only so much precious time to enjoy it and slaving away at some job is not worth it. Do what you can to reduce your workload and find better employment, or hell try to change the working conditions at your current job to improve things for everyone if you can."
Mrhappytrigers
Well Obvi...
"Donate a kidney."
ToffieMonster
"Well, you could donate the remaining one. You just won’t be around to say anything about it."
shavemejesus
This is definitely list I can relate to. No thank you on a lot of this!
I Quit
"Smoke cigarettes, it's been two years since I quit."
SuvenPan
Forget It
"Climb mount Kilimanjaro. Toughest thing I've done and it's not worth it. I'm all about tough treks and camping but to put yourself under tough conditions and suspectable to altitude sickness only to get to the top for 10 minutes for a picture. No thank you."
Monks_
"I agree, it was memorable. Once was enough for my husband and I. Thankfully we stayed at American style hotel run by the US Navy with a hot tub and bar. Alcohol was definitely needed after all that."
Whatsherface112
I'm living alone!
"Sign a lease with a stranger without hanging out with them a few times beforehand. My past roommate experiences in college were terrible. Roommates either ignored me, hosted parties til 3 AM on weeknights, made the house the hangout and drug-den for them and their buddies. Meet up once and they'll put on an act for you. If you can, try to see how they act drunk or frustrated."
"Try to hang out with their buddies too so you can see the type of people who could be coming into your future place of residence. As soon as I can afford it, I'm living alone! Now, I investigate a potential roommate's social media and hang out at least twice before signing a lease with them."
fleursdefer
Stay Away
"Take back a cheater. Know your worth my brothers and sisters."
santichrist
"Ughhhhh going back and forth on this one. My boyfriend of 5 years has cheated on me. Several times, actually but says he’s really changed and is ready to settle down and wants me to move in with him. I’m on the fence. So they never change???"
madlecroy
Sleeptime
"Take a laxative and sleeping pill at the same time."
karmaredemption
Once, twice, three times... I'm out. Bye.
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People Imagine How They'd React If Their Significant Other Wanted To Sleep With Other People
There is an age old question that has been getting more traction surrounding sex for partners the last decade or so.
And that is... "is just one enough?"
Were we really meant to only be with one person forever?
There are so many flavors to taste.
What if your partner wants more cookie dough with your strawberry?
Redditor Pineapple-Status wanted to hear everyone's thoughts on opening the bedroom to others. They asked:
"What would you do if your long term SO suddenly wants to have sex with other people?"
I say I'd be ok with it, but I'm remembering my last relationship and I feel like I'm not a "put my $ where my mouth is type" on this issue.
Bye
"Wish her well and spend the next 2 years getting myself back to a place where I am ready to get hurt again."
wickedblight
It's Time to Roll On...
"Personally I would leave them."
"I think they're the ones leaving you. I don't think the relationship changes at that point; I think it ends. If you have a monogamous relationship, they are telling you they want to end that. They might be suggesting starting a new, non-monogamous relationship, but that is a separate thing. The original relationship is over."
octopoddle
ethical non-monogamy...
"OP, it's no different than anything else they want: you either agree and stay together, disagree but stay together, disagree and break up, or even agree and break up. What you're talking about is called 'ethical non-monogamy.'" The seminal book to read is called The Ethical Sl*t."
"It basically boils down to be whatever you want, just don't lie about it. The tricky thing is that this is something that was not present before, but is present now. So it's a potential fork in your road. If you're against it, it's up to your SO to decide if sex with other people is more important to them than a life with you."
Tokugawa
a different story...
"I think it depends too how intently they're interested. If it's a thing they bring up because they're curious but it's not a dealbreaker for them, I'm fine with that even if I don't want to proceed. A solid relationship involves open communication, and it'd make me happy if my partner trusted us and our bond enough to voice that curiosity with me."
"If it's something their heart's absolutely set on, then it's a different story. Either way, it's kind of strange to me how these posts always assume simply asking your partner how they feel about opening the relationship means they're now wholey invested in the poly lifestyle and they'll resent you or cheat if you say no."
donkeynique
Others
"Happy that we have common interest, sad that it's different 'other people."
i_lick_icicles
Sex is always an issue. Remember when it was just fun?
Mine
"Leave her. I’m far too possessive and jealous to be able to mentally accept polyamory. If she has a desire to be with other people I’m not going to stand in her way but I’m not going to be there when she gets home either."
Thiek
Not Me...
"Break up. My parents were poly and it's just not for me. I've been honest with every relationship I've been in that I'm not interested in any type of open relationship. If they want to be with someone else that's fine but we'll be over. My husband is aware of this and on board (and has been for over twenty years!). So if he came to me with this yes I would be heartbroken but I'm not willing to budge on this and it would be the end of our relationship."
GoldDustWitchQueen
Let's Talk
"Counseling time! We're married. I'm chronically ill (stage 4 breast cancer) and have no libido. We try to make intimacy work, and obviously in that case it wouldn't be working. So. Time for a pro to sort out the marriage, and possibly a sex therapist for me."
insertcaffeine
Awkward Positions
"I’ll put myself hypothetically in this position. My partner and I only want each other. We’ve made this abundantly clear to each other. However, if she came to me with desire to open our bedroom and she wanted to sleep with people outside our marriage."
"I would simply express how I vehemently do not an open bedroom and that it would kill any desire I have to want her, be with her, love her, etc. Our couple dynamic has been working well through our ups and downs. Involving some stranger in the ONE thing I find most sacred with my partner is the best way for me to lose any interest or passion for the relationship."
RedFlaim
Farewell
"Break it off, because they definitely already have someone in mind and you telling them no won't change the fact that they were only one step away from following through with it."
Caressticles
Well it feels like a lot of people still believe in one partner, happily ever after. Good for y'all. But big props to these couples who have open and honest conversations about their wants and needs.
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Many of us sometimes fantasize about what we would do to our worst enemies, especially in the moments when they're actively making our lives worse.
While most of us would never actually do any of the things that we contemplate instead of screaming at that super annoying person at the office, we do get pretty creative with the ideas.
Redditor take_me_there_ asked:
"What WOULD you wish on your worst enemy?"
This One Would Hurt
"A conscience. Let her realize the horrific things she’s done."
- Jenny010137
"Seriously. Introspection, self awareness, and empathy are traits that would improve a lot of sh*tty people."
- el_muerte17
"Oh I wish I had thought of this one. If my enemy had a conscience, wow life would be much different."
- Shelbysouth43
No Pearly Whites For You
"I’d like all their teeth to turn really yellow and stay yellow no matter what they do."
- toothfixingfiend
"What did I ever do to you?"
- Spideredd
"I don't even know you! Give me back my enamel!"
- AngryMustache9
Everything You Own Is Orange Now
"Permanent Cheeto fingers. Just orange cheese dust getting on everything."
- cocoapuff1721
"This has to be one of the most evil things I ever heard, yet absolutely hilarious."
-Merk0411
"The Midas Touch: Snack Edition"
- MaryVenetia
Ouch, But Forever
"Stubbing and breaking their toe and right as it’s about to be done healing it happens again over and over for the rest of their pitiful time on this hell we call earth."
- No-Bee-2971
"Sisyphoot"
- Alpha_6
"More of a Toemetheus imo"
- PykeTheDrowned
Self Reflection
"For them to realize how big of an a-hole they are."
- mayhemanaged
"Same for me. The trouble is mine probably knows what a tremendous a-hole he is, and just doesn't care (it's what defines him, is his outlook more than likely), so, give mine a conscience as well, he undeniably lacks one."
- RhoadsOfRock
"a crushing moment of self realization is something that can destroy you mentally. I wish that on them."
- chancetodream
Bury Them Under A Mountain Of Minor Inconveniences
"Always being hungry two hours after eating no matter how large the meal. Slow internet. Traffic jams no matter the location. Self doubt. Allergies. Favorite shows spoiled."
"Nothing major enough to be life altering but constant, low grade inconveniences that wear on your soul every day."
- I_Love_Small_Br**sts
"Every bite of food they eat/drink they drink being slightly the wrong temperature."
"Coffee? Warm but not hot. Cola? Cool, but not cold. Muffin? Ever so slightly frozen."
"Not enough to ruin their life, but just enough to not quite have full enjoyment of anything.."
- HappiHappiHappi
They'll Never Be Able To Use Their Computer Again
"Quick scan with McAfee on their computer."
- halflife_3
"You f**king monster."
- Orion_2kTC
"The constant pop-ups from McAfee is too far."
- _Land_Rover_Series_3
That's A New Level Of Evil
"Bed bugs."
- thrawn1825
"Currently dealing with bed bugs, and I can absolutely confirm this is the kind of thing I would wish upon my worst enemy. It is miserable and painful, and I've tried everything to get rid of them at this point."
"I would easily wish this upon my worst enemy, x10."
- ArbitrarilyStagnant
"Oh hell no, you went there... Hopefully they aren't living in an apartment complex or you've cursed everyone in the building."
- expect_less
Well of course I know him. He’s me.
"$100,000. I sure could use it."
- Sparklesperson
"'It’s no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy'"
- FishyVonFishenHymer
"Lol I thought this was that deep sh*t like 'pray for those you resent to have all the things you want in life….' Then I realized."
- No-Chipmunk9527
Forever Constipated
"That they can never have a satisfying poop. They always feel like they have to go to the bathroom and when they do nothing comes."
- [User Deleted]
"Wow. That's evil. Always feeling the need to pee would be good (as in horrific) too."
- ipakookapi
We definitely don't recommend implementing any of these plans (not that most would actually be possible), but here's some new ideas for the next time you're stuck in a meeting with your most annoying coworker and need a little fantastical escape.
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I grew up poor, and I remember the little things that made me smile when we just happened to have enough that week.
The little things that a truly rich person would not think twice about.
Ah, the luxury of it.
What spells luxury for you?
Redditor ConAir161057 wanted to compare notes about the things in life that feel like items only money can buy. They asked:
"For people who grew up with little money, what always felt like a luxury?"
New clothes. I had so many hand me downs and thrift store clothes... new seemed like a dream.
Anxiety
"After growing up in a home where every unexpected problem was a financial emergency, my idea of wealthy became 'I just want enough money that if something breaks I don't get anxiety about how to deal with it.'"
Obiwan_ca_bl**me
Literature
"Getting to buy something from the scholastic book fair."
Rich*itch3232
"My school, at the end of it a bunch of books were 'donated' and then spread out on a table in the library. We all got to go pick one book. So even if kids didn’t get to purchase a book, in the end they had a chance to still get a book. It’s actually how I got my first Harry Potter book. Was a cool idea for any school staff or parents active in their kids’ schools."
glass_pillow
Christmas
"Getting new clothes at Christmas from relatives. I don't know if that is exactly a luxury or the kind of answer you are looking for, but we never had a lot of money when I was in middle school. I went an entire year wearing the same pants everyday. The funny thing was my parents didn't even buy them for me."
"I got them for Christmas from my Grandparents. All the kids use to give me so much sh*t for wearing the same pants everyday. I always told them that I had 5 of the same pair which made me feel good inside and kind of made them ease off even though I know they didn't believe me."
"I remember I fell on the school bus one day and the jagged floor cut a hole right in the knee cap and the panic that went over me was just insane. It was one of the worst feelings of my whole life because I knew that I didn't have any other pants to wear and that now all of the kids in my school were going to know that I only had 1 pair. Needless to say I could not wait for the last month of school to end."
themagicman_1231
I'm Away
"Summer camp, or basically any school trips that had to be paid for. At my school the kids who couldn't afford to go on trips that happened during school hours still had to come to the school, we just sat in a room and did extra work like it was detention."
Helpful_Yams
"I was lucky. If you taught at the day camp your kid could go for free. That was just day camp though not sleepaway camp. My mom found a camp teacher who had no kids of his own and he signed me up as his kid so I could get free day camp. Did that all through elementary school."
randtcouple
Big Deals
"Going out for pizza was a big deal. Those free mini pizzas for reading books were huge."
Shroom4Yoshi
Food is always an issue when you're broke.
Damage
"Being able to turn on the heat in the cold and pay a professional to fix damaged appliances, plumbing, and other issues."
Liggettef
Spoiled
"When my grandma would come pick me up and spoil me. My parents didn't have much money and were addicts so when my grandma would come get me I would come back with new clothes, video games, toys, etc. I used to think my grandma was rich but she actually just had a stable income."
nawlepen
"I was in this position when I was younger. I always thought my grandma had SO much money… but all she did was go to work everyday. Always made sure I had clothes and all my school supplies. I miss her pretty bad."
Keywork29
Water
"I am from a small island in the Pacific. While I mostly still take cold showers, I have always felt that a hot shower is the finest luxury one can experience. I had my first hot shower when I was 22 years old and I can never forget it."
FSMPIO
"This is the kind of luxury I think people take for granted, I always avoided showers in the winter as a kid since most of the time they where cold showers and the temperature here was around 12c° during those times."
PowerfullDio
Showerware
"Towels. Honestly, I was almost 10 When I realized people didn’t just put back on their dirty clothes after a shower because my family was so large (12 kids total including myself) and extremely poor. I thought towels were just for hotels or were maybe a prop on television. I went to a friends house and she asked for my help folding her towels. I remember laughing and thinking she must be rich."
"Long story short, I wasn’t sure which way to fold the towels, and begged my mom to buy them after I revealed that my friend, Simone, had them. She bought a box of used ones from a local auction and I walked around with them on my head feeling like a frigging empress after that, even though—-let’s be clear… these were second hand towels!"
shakezula1025
Or BK...
"Grew up poor and when I was a kid I used to think you were rich if you had a dishwasher and a millionaire if you had one of those refrigerators that have a button for ice. McDonalds was also a luxury, a couple times a year on our birthdays."
chinderellab*tch
Everyone should have access to all of these things. Why is life unfair?
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