We unfortunately don't usually get to choose the way we (naturally) die. But wouldn't it be great if there were some things we could just avoid?
For example, nobody wants Alzheimer's. Nobody wants to drown. Nobody wants to die slowly and painfully, forgetting who they are.
Absolutely nobody.
u/Skystalker512 asked:
What is a cause of death you certainly don't want to die from?
Here were some of the answers.
Distress
A couple months ago I was on a train when it stopped and asked all medical personnel to report to my car. I look back and a man is on the floor with his girlfriend sobbing. Everyone went quiet so I heard him gasp "I....can't....breathe" and I was so scared I would witness this man's panicked last breaths. After about 20 minutes they were able to get him stable enough to carry him off.
Before I had never really thought of not being able to breathe as a terrifying way to die but damn....
Nope Nope Nope Nope
Death by lathe. It's not so much for me as it is for the poor jerk who has to untangle me.
I've seen photos of the aftermath, certainly taught me to respect the machinery.
The Trenches
Drown in the mud like soldiers during WWI
Oh damn, that. I heard Dan Carlin's podcast on Passchendele, and the unmitigated horror of slowly drowning in mud over the course of a few days haunts my sleep. They begged their brothers-in-arms to shoot them.
Nature's Slow Cooker
Glow Worms. The way they kill their prey is one of the most painful ways to die in the animal kingdom. They use the silk stands to attract prey, paralyse them, drill a hole in the side of their head and fill their insides with stomach acid, then leave them - for 2 weeks to digest.
Oddly Specific
Surviving a High-speed Car crash only to come out of surgery, live in massive pain for two days and then your heart gives out from all the excruciating pain.
Or surviving a fire but over half your body is covered in 3rd Degree wounds, only to die weeks before being cleared to leave and having to spend all those years in the burn unit only to never see the outside world again.
Mental Anguish
Killed by someone I know.
I don't want to spend the last minutes of my life with the conflicting thought of all the moments I lived with that person Vs. What they're doing to me at the moment. Fear, frustration, sadness, betrayal, pain.
Just Like Floyd Collins
John Jones, who got stuck upside down in a super tight cave passage in Utah and rescuers couldn't get him out... so they had to just let him die and then sealed the cave up.
Yeah. Not my ideal bucket kicking.
Ker-Plunk
Driving off a bridge into deep water. Its never happened to me, but for some reason the sound of a windshield cracking upon impact with water and the feeling of a seatbelt digging into my neck and hips pop up in my nightmares a lot. I have a hard time crossing bridges in vehicles, thanks to that.
The Worst Of The Worst
Giphy
Alzheimer's. I have a seizure condition, and when I have had a seizure there is a period of time where I cannot remember certain things. For instance there was an incident where I couldn't remember friends names, or how to do basic things like wash the dishes. I could not muster any memory of how to turn the water on, use the dish soap or how to actually clean the dish. It has lasted for upwards of a week. And it's scary. Because you cannot communicate meaningfully with others. So I couldn't imagine being like that without recourse.
Made Of Stone
Giphy
I remember reading about this guy that fell into a pit of concrete powder, and he inhaled some of it. It set in his lungs, causing him to very slowly and painfully suffocate.
The lungs are a series of tissues, crossing one another, which makes it worse. It's not like in a cartoon, where they're just balloons. They're like sponges to maximize surface area for respiration; having cement dust first burn and then set between the membranes is arguably the most horrible sensation I can imagine.
Stop Touch
Fibrodysplasia ossificans progressiva
The best known FOP case is that of Harry Eastlack (1933–1973). His condition began to develop at the age of ten, and by the time of his death from pneumonia in November 1973, six days before his 40th birthday, his body had completely ossified, leaving him able to move only his lips.
O.o
Lost
Like that poor chick lost in the Odessa catacombs; total darkness, panic, silence and just slowly fading from lack of EVERYTHING... cannot imagine a more drawn out and miserable way to go
So sad
Unconventional, Yet Still Horrible
Giphy
I just got told of a case, where a guy put a pantyhose over his head, added some cheddar on top and sat in front of a heating lamp. Suffocated on melting cheese. Way to go!
Reality Taken
I think more than anything on earth I'm scared of alzheimers.
To me it's just so sad.
You live a long, healthy life, with so many beautiful memories to just have them ripped away from you.
You forget your SO, then your kids, then everyone else, then what? You're alone in this world and you're stuck living with that hell.
You die with nothing, no memories, no loved ones (as far as you know) and that is the most heartbreaking thing to me.
I'd rather die than deal with that.
The hardest thing I've ever done was tell my great grandmother I love her and she doesn't even respond.
I don't want to live through that, no way in hell.
Anxietyeh
In a plane crash. The actual impact isn't what I'm talking about, it's the unbearable amount of terror you'd experience before. Like you know you're going to die while hurling to the ground, and everybody in a screaming panic around you. Gets my anxiety up whenever I think about it. I'm going on a 9 hr plane trip next month and I have a severe phobia of them.
Under The Ground
Buried alive with an oxygen tube running into the coffin/box/whatever it is you're buried in. Obviously it would suck if you were buried alive but you wouldn't be alive for long. There's only so much oxygen in that enclosed area before you run out and ultimately die (6 or so hours give or take). Well, now imagine you're buried alive but have a tube running from the coffin to the surface that provides you with enough oxygen to breathe normally. You're stuck there for days until you die of dehydration. Days trapped in a tight, enclosed area with no relief. All you can do is sit there and suffer in darkness until your body finally gives out or if you're lucky, die of shock. Sounds like a pretty terrifying way to go if you ask me.
I'm best when I'm at my laziest. Ok, that's a lie, but I don't care.
Zzzz...
Donald Duck Sleeping GIFGiphy"On weekends I sleep for 12-14 hours. I usually wake up a few times but I dream so much during those long sleeps that it’s basically become a recreation type thing and I love it."
HouseOfZenith
Warm it up...
"When I use the microwave, I’ll heat food for 1:11 or 2:22 because I can’t be bothered to move my lazy fingers."
fysicks
"I figured out that my microwave's turntable rotates once every 12 seconds. So, everything I cook is on a multiple of 12 seconds so that it always ends up at the front of the microwave when it's done cooking, and I don't have to reach all the way to the back of the microwave to get my food out."
unittwentyfive
Bang
"When I was a kid on a school day, I had this routine where I'd stick my legs out of the bed and bang around on the floor so it sounded like I got out of bed and then just lie there for a few more minutes."
bewarethechameleon
"Did you also get your toothbrush wet and squirt a wee bit of toothpaste in your mouth rather than actually brush your teeth? If so I may be your mom and you weren’t fooling me or the dentist and you sure weren’t fooling the plaque that attacked."
TigerLily98226
Pockets
"Whenever I clean the house I put on my housecoat with really big pockets. I just walk from room to room and put things in my pocket that don’t belong in that room. Once my pockets are full I go to each room and empty my pockets putting what is from each room in that room."
kindhearttbc
"That's not lazy... that's productive AF."
throwaway92715
Toss It
Pippi Longstocking Chaos GIF by ZDFGiphy"I don’t fold the fitted sheet. Just ball it up and place it in the closet."
SpaghettiSquash33
I just see people human. Don't he so hard on yourselves.
12 Hours
Tired Fight Club GIFGiphy"I once watched 12 hours of the golf Network because the batteries were dead in my remote control. I don't know if that's lazy or depressed."
sadbirdfox
I swear I was...
"I was taught to make a bed properly as a child, I swear I was. Hospital corners and everything. I even know how to fold a fitted sheet, thanks to my auntie, who's an Air Force nurse and therefore doesn't consider little problems like 'non-Euclidean geometry' to be a reason not to do it properly. The second I found out about duvet covers, that was over. Sure, it doesn't look as tidy, but five minutes a week plus 10 seconds in the morning instead of 10 minutes a day? I can live with that."
katie-kaboom
The System
"I don't fold laundry anymore. I have a system of laundry baskets like this where clothes gets sorted by type (pants, t-shirts, sweaters, etc). Most of my clothes is wrinkle free, and for the few pieces that aren't I just throw them on a hanger in the bathroom while I take a steamy shower."
User deleted
Genius!!
"Before I get out of bed in the morning, I will grab the top corners of my sheets with my hands and prop up the bottom two with my feet and move it into place. Then I slide out of bed without ruffling anything. Just like that, my bed is made."
Markymark142
"My sister has to do this before she goes to bed at night, even is she made the bed that morning. It's an odd little quirk and mostly harmless."
mel2mdl
Yummy
andrew huang pots GIF by SoundflyGiphy"Just eating food straight out of the pan."
refrshmts_N_narcotcs
None of that sounds so bad. That sounds... like my life. Don't judge!!
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Did you check the forecast?
"We sure are having a lot of weather"- r_Ju_Tacular.
"As a British person, the conversation usually starts like this:"
“'You alright?'"
”Yeah you?”'
“'Yeah not too bad, weathers a bit sh*t innit?'”
“'Yeah”'.
"The end."- chelstippins
Cloud Storm GIF by Weather UndergroundGiphyWhy beat around the bush?
"Straight to politics and religion."- Turd_Ferguson009.
Just let it happen.
"Make an observation."
"Literally anything."It helps if it’s something about them like an article of clothing that catches your eye, something they’re doing, anything that you can relate to or are interested in but it doesn’t have to be."
"It can be something in the environment that is drawing both of your attention."
"People bullsh*t about the weather all the time."
"Make a comment about it, gauge their willingness to talk about it to you and build off of what you get from the response."
"If all you get is 'haha yeah', leave it."
"No shame in silence."
"Some people just don’t want to talk."
I"f you’re talking about the weather, 'Man it’s a great day out today!'"
“'Yeah absolutely! I drove here with my windows down all the way here!'”
"Boom, you’ve got something to latch onto."
"They probably enjoy getting outside for some fresh air. "
"They probably enjoy driving."
"Ask about their car."
"Ask if they go on drives a lot."
"Ask if they do outdoor stuff."
"What kind of outdoor stuff?"
"Once you’ve got something to work with, the key is to ask."
"Let them do the talking."
"People love talking about themselves."
"You learn some light hearted things about the stranger, they feel more comfortable, and you can add bits and bobs of your own experiences in response so they get to know you too."
"It works in literally any situation."
"From an elevator ride to a first date."
"It’s so easy to personalize small talk and it makes it so much less uncomfortable."- 1arrocknroll.
"But enough about me, what do you think about me?"
"Usually people love to talk about themselves, so a few questions about them and some follow up questions to their answers usually does it."- I_can_see_the_music.
For Me GIF by Liz HuettGiphy"Food, glorious food..."
"Food."
"People typically love food."
"I mention I’m new/newer to an area."
"And ask them what they like, where they eat out."
"Usually works and people have their choices validated and I always know where to find good local snacks."- TheProfWife.
Pluto Flyby GIFCan you believe it?
"Did you see that ludicrous display last night?"- housemuncher.
Nothing!
"As a Norwegian - we leave strangers alone."
"No need to bother them."- neihuffda.
No Idea Reaction GIF by BounceGiphyThe sky's the limit.
"So, do you like stuff?"- Bwon669.
All of these seem like surefire ways to get a conversation started.
But use cautiously, as who knows how long it will take these conversations to end.
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