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The All-Time Creepiest Theories People Actually Believe

Earth is flat protest
Photo by Kajetan Sumila on Unsplash

The earth is flat.

The moon in hollow.

Evolution didn't happen.

These are only some of the wild, laughably ridiculous theories that a disheartening number of people actually believe.

In spite of ample scientific evidence proving them wrong.

Nonetheless, they go on believing these ludicrous theories.

Some of which are creepy enough even to make those with the toughest skin have trouble going to bed at night.


Redditor BiblicalBible was fascinated to hear the absolute creepiest theories that people continue to believe to this very day, leading them to ask:
"What is the scariest/creepiest theory you know about?"

How It All Began...

"This isn’t a theory, but I just think it’s cool."

"Y’know how movies and shows always have this ‘ancient alien race’ that came way before us, and we’re the new species?"

"Well technically, most likely thats wrong."

"We are near the beginning of the universe, if the universe was a person, we would literally barely be a cell, not even formed
In reality, we are the ancient species, we are the ones that come before, we are the ones some future civilization may see."

"Just a crazy thing to think about."- Podomus

A Whole Other Life

"I have a sleep disorder that causes nightmares and dreams that are often indistinguishable from reality."

"I live whole lives with partners and kids or work jobs in strange places for decades in full technicolour details and reach old age before waking."

"Sometimes it’s so intense that I sob and grieve for the lost relationships as if my real life partner has died."

"I am confused to be my own age and be here, now."

"The theory that this life is a dream/simulation type thing feels pretty real to me."

"My brain seems to create whole viable realities anyway."- Isolampg

Tired Season 4 GIF by The Simpsons Giphy

It Just Doesn't Add Up...

"I find numbers stations to be pretty creepy."

"Their purpose is technically a theory, as the groups that broadcast them won't officially confirm even their existence for the most part."

"Essentially, spying is still a very real thing for most world governments."

"One of the most foolproof ways of delivering a coded message is through a one-time code, a code used just once before being discarded."

"Your spy has the key, you have the message, and once the key is used it is discarded and the next message is sent using a different key."

"Additionally, shortwave radio is an extremely secure way of sending these messages."

"It sounds weird, that a radio station anyone with a shortwave radio can listen to, would be considered 'secure'."

"But the beauty of the method is that shortwave radios are ubiquitous, cheap technology throughout most of the world."

"What looks more suspicious, a person traveling with a radio, or a person traveling with a sophisticated computer or satellite phone?"

"While the signal can be received by anyone, it leaves no record of who received it and can't be intercepted and traced by a middleman."

"They don't care if you listen, because the stream of numbers is nothing without the code, and because you're using a one-time code, it can't be cracked as it's randomly generated and used once."

"The only time a one-time code has ever been broken was an instance where the code was re-used."

"So your spy just tunes in to the radio at a specific time on a specific day, writes down the numbers."

"Decodes the message, discards the key, and no one is any the wiser."

"Most stations are identified by a call sign or little jingle, and these can range from kind of cute and cheerful to pretty eerie sounding."

"If you listen in frequently, you'll hear messages repeated over and over until one day they change up - it's believed they'll repeat the message until their spy can communicate they've received it."

"Essentially, if you have a shortwave radio, you can listen in on highly secret spy communications from countries all over the world."

"You can also listen in on countries jamming the communication, either by broadcasting state radio on the same signal, or trying to jam it with noise or static."

"You'd think the frequency of these transmissions would have gone down after the Cold War, but they're still going strong!"

"The very first numbers stations appeared in the very early days of radio, during World War I."

"I find it fascinating, but also super creepy, that all of this secret communication is happening right out in the open, for us to tune in to at any time, without any way of knowing who it is intended for or what is being transmitted."- Tintinabulation

loop numbers GIF Giphy

Before There Were Even Dinosaurs...

"Not much of a 'theory', more of a conjecture but:

"Fossilization is actually quite rare."

"It takes extremely specific set of circumstances for a dead organism even to become fossilized let alone survive intact to the modern day to be found by humans."

"Because of this, there are likely millions of species we will simply never know about because none of them ever fossilized."

"For all we know, we might not even be the first intelligent species to evolve here on Earth."

"There could’ve been a species that formed a civilization at some point and then went extinct later on, but we’ll possibly never know that because there are no fossils that formed/survive today."

"It probably wouldn’t have been an advanced, industrialized civilization like the kind we have today as we would’ve surely found evidence for it by now, but I could easily see something on par with Ancient Egypt disappear completely after millions of years."- DannyBright

"How Can I Remember Things That Never Happened?"

"Telling this story makes me feel uncomfortable, even today, so I will tell it here."

"I don't know how much this story fits into this thread, but I've never had a platform that seemed appropriate to share it, so here we go.'

"When I was 20 (14 years ago), I moved from Iowa to Boulder, Colorado with my best friend Cory."

"We moved there during the month of August, and shortly thereafter I got a phone call from a number I didn't know."

"I answered it, and it turned out to be this girl that had attended the same high school as us, Ashley."

"Ashley had heard that Cory and I had just moved to Boulder, and she was calling because she, too, had just moved to Boulder to attend CU."

"She wanted to know if we wanted to get together some time and hang out / party."

"Ashley was a couple years younger than us and we didn't run in the same crowds, so we didn't hang out much."

"But I remember her coming over to our apartment to smoke and chill once, then I remember asking her to get us weed--she did."

"She came with us to a party once, and I also remember us asking her for weed a second time, and her texting me back saying 'You guys just message me when you want weed, so no'."

"After that I don't think we talked to her again."

"Fast forward 3-4 years, Cory and I are living back in Iowa."

"One night, I was out with a couple of people I'd gone to high school with, and we went to this dive bar called Thumbs.'

"In the back of Thumbs there is a single pool table, which is where my group went because we had planned on playing."

"We got to the pool table, and there's Ashley, racking a set of pool balls."

"I was super surprised to see her there, so I walked right up to her and said something like 'Ashley, long time no see! What are you doing here? Did you move back from Boulder?'"

"Ashley just stared at me for a second and then said 'What?'"

"So I repeat myself and say 'Did you move back from Colorado? I haven't seen you since we hung out in Boulder!'"

"She looked truly confused, and then she said 'Um.. what are you talking about? I never lived in Boulder'."

"At this point I thought she was f*cking with me because I specifically remembered hanging out with her more than once. So I laughed and was like 'You're f*cking with me, right?""

"She shook her head no, and one of the girls I was with, who knew both of us, actually overheard it and butted in to confirm that 'Ashley had lived in [our hometown] the whole time'."

"I completely dropped the subject to save face, but the experience was so unsettling that I made a bee-line for the front door."

"I walked out onto the sidewalk, pulled my phone out of my pocket, and called Cory."

"I said 'Cory, do you remember when we lived together in Boulder and Ashley came over and hung out with us?'"

"And Cory said 'No man, that never happened'."

"He was my best friend so I knew he wasn't f*cking with me, plus there was a zero percent chance he and Ashley had ever talked to set something like this up."

"When I pressed the issue, he insisted that no one we had gone to high school with had ever moved out to Boulder, and that we certainly hadn't hung out with them."

"Since then, I've brought this up to Cory several times, and his position has never changed."

"To this day, I don't know what happened."

"I specifically remember hanging out with her."

"She wore a tie-dye t-shirt when she came over the first time."

"And we hung out with her multiple times, I remember it so clearly."

"I still have those memories, but apparently they never happened."

"Even though the timeline matches exactly; she would have graduated high school that year and moved to Colorado in August for school."

"I know that the human memory is super unreliable, and I'm sure that's all this is, but that doesn't change that I am absolutely 100% sure that this happened."

"14 years later and I still stand by my story, wrong as it may be." - morbowillcrushyou

black and white love GIF Giphy

They Can Hear Us From Beyond The Grave...

"The last neuron in the brain can fire up to 72 hours after clinical death."

"What is classed as still being alive?"

"Your heart stops or your brain activity stopping?"

"As a nurse this plays on my mind, I always talk to the recently deceased as I would usually do."

"Hearing is the last sense to go anyway so chances are people can still hear for a short time after death."

"I have to confirm death on a daily basis, we check heart sounds, breathing, eye response, and pain response, but part of me knows that electrical activity is still going on in there."

"I’m a hospice nurse and morbid thoughts are what I do best."- jowiejojo

Life Goes On...

"Some smart people I know say life extension tech will exponentially explode in the next century, transforming adult life spans the same way antibiotics, vaccines, and sanitation irrevocably transformed childhood survival rates."

"If we hadn’t blocked stem cell research, we could be the ones living youthful, nearly disease-free lives but we’ve missed our chance by one or two generations."- Lemontreelumur

What The Government Doesn't Want Us To Know

"The Vela Incident."

"September 1979, a US Vela satellite detected a double flash of light over an area of the ocean between South Africa and Antarctica."

"The prior 41 double flashes observed by the satellite were from nuclear explosions as this is what they were designed to observe."

"There also happened to be a typhoon happening in the area at the time so it seemed like someone wanted to detonate it without being caught."

"Carter administration reported that it was a natural occurrence due to a small meteorite hitting the satellite."

"However many other independent sources and even other countries have reported that they did indeed find traces of fallout and radiation."

"Because of the geopolitical climate of the times, there’s very strong evidence that it was in fact a joint nuclear weapon test carried out by South Africa and Israel, and the US scrubbed the information regarding it because they didn’t want to paint their allies in Israel in a bad light for working with apartheid-era South Africa."

"Strangely enough, Israel and South Africa have never denied having nuclear weapons programs, nor have they ever denied a joint test being responsible for the Vela Incident."- DJCJ42

nuclear explosion bomb GIF Giphy

Was He Ever Really There?

"The man from Taured."

"He was going through an airport and when asked for his passport he gave the people a fully legitimate passport."

"Except the country he was from didn’t exist."

"He argued that it was right between France and Spain and had been there over 200 years."

"Since the passport was legitimate but the country wasn’t on the map they put him up in a hotel for the night with guards outside his 4 story room."

"He was gone, along with all his things the next morning."

"Not a trace."- 1122Sl110

When The Stars Align...

"Not a theory but a matter of fact."

"The Milky Way and many other nearby galaxies are hurtling towards the same point in space, being attracted by something."

"We don't know what because our view in blocked, but it's pulling GALAXIES towards itself."

"Big ones too, the Milky Way is a rather large galaxy."

"Whatever this 'Great Attractor"'(as it's been dubbed) is, it's insanely massive."- Lui_Le_Diamond

Surely, none of these things ever happened, right?

Depending on who you ask, who knows...

Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

boy playing at laptop inside room
Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

Person holding large stack of books
Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

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See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

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Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

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The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.