People Confess The Absolute Dumbest Thing They Believed As A Kid

Kid coming to a shocking realization
Ben White/Unsplash

The moment we find out there's no Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny is when we are forced to become adults.

We lose our childlike sense of wonder, setting many of us up for perpetual skepticism.

But since believing in these mythic heroes is commonly embraced by kids all over the world, it does provides a sense of relief that we all fell victim to the same ruse that brought so many of us plenty of joy.

However, there are specific situations where being gullible was embarrassing because no one else was as impressionable as you were. Sound familiar?

Curious to hear about our childhood, Redditor Keke_Dudu asked:

"What's the dumbest thing you believed as a kid?"

Redditors thought they were going to be violently pursued.

Potty Monster

"I would be in a perpetual state of fear on the toilet because I thought an alligator would bite my backside."

– aeiou-i-love-you

Flotsam & Jetsam

"I had a recurring nightmare that the eels from Little Mermaid were gonna come up the toilet and go for my butt."

– Greylings

Having active imaginations is nothing surprising...up until a certain age.

​Sheep Exist For Real

"I thought sheep weren’t real when I was quite little. I thought they were mythical creatures like unicorns and dragons."

"My parents eventually figured this out and took me to a farm to see some real sheep, and my preschool brain was just like oh my god??? Are you fricking kidding me??? Sheep??? and was apparently just absolutely aghast at the sight of sheep."

– MatthewBrokenlamp

Fake News

"Not me, but my dad believed spaghetti grew on trees till middle school. All because he saw it on a TV commercial."

– KailerJ3304

Live And Work At One Place

"I thought ppl lived at their jobs. so mcdonald’s workers lived at mcdonald’s, teachers lived at school, etc. and that my parents just happened to be the exceptional weird discipline tactics."

– highuptop

Parents have wild disciplinary tactics.

Solo Snooze

"My parents had me convinced that if i don't learn to sleep alone when i was 8, I'd never be able to do it and I'll have to sleep with them even after I'm an adult. Idk why that scared me at that time but their little trick worked. Having a little brother is nice."

– kshay-

No More Loose Boogers

"My parents told me that they don’t let people who don’t know how to blow their nose into Disneyworld. We had a trip coming up so I learned fast. I truly thought that they had someone at the gate handing everyone a tissue to make sure they could blow their nose to be allowed in."

– OrangeTree81

Princesses Know How To Pee

"My daughter learned how to use the toilet real quick because I said only potty-trained kids could go to Cinderella's House. She didn't know we already had the trip to Disney booked, and I did not have a plan for if it backfired." - Reddit

What if these were true?

Conditional Teleporter

"A friend said he could teleport, just not when they were at school."

– Kerrminater

Delivering Bad News

"There was only one mailman. Idk wtf I was on but I remember telling my grandma 'look the mailman got on this side of town fast' she was like I know you don't think that's the same mailman. I said yea so she took me to the post office downtown and I saw all the mail trucks and was like oooooooooooo well I'm dumb."

– XxXWatchItAllBurnxXx

As a kid, I often psyched myself up and always thought of the worst case scenario.

My fears got the best of me when I went to camp as an eight-year-old.

The camp counselors would tell us about the "Unjai monster" or bigfoot snatching away the kids who didn't fall asleep when it was time for lights out.

I had the top of the bunk bed...right next to a window. I couldn't sleep that whole night because I was too afraid the Unjai monster would sense my restlessness and grab me through the window and take me deep into the woods and feed me to its family.

It was the worst.

I still can't tell if my bedsheets were soaked with night sweats or pee.

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