You're a Nurse?

I had a nurse (she told me twice she was a nurse before we confirmed the address)... anywho, the nurse tells me she's babysitting an infant. So I'm starting to get into baby CPR mode... again, tells me she's a nurse. I ask her what she's reporting: "Well, like I said, I'm babysitting this infant and cutting his finger nails.

I accidentally cut one Tom short and it's bleeding" Did you cut a part of the finger off? "No. It's just bleeding". At this point, I can give some basic bleeding instructions. But we literally sent an ambulance to help a "nurse" apply a bandage.

LeggyBald

In Transit

My boyfriend and I used to work at an operating theatre at the guest counter and we'd get calls for directions all the time.

My boyfriend fielded one of these calls one time and was just getting more and more annoyed because the person wanted directions but refused to tell him where they were coming from.

I think they wound up hanging up on him and calling back to complain about him... To him.

Some say they're still in transit today.

Nillabeans

Services Not Rendered. 

I used to volunteer with my local PD and was helping deliver some goodies to the county dispatch center (figure that's a better introduction then "I'm not a dispatcher, but...") While I was chatting with one of the dispatchers who was taking 911 calls, they received a call from a man who immediately starts yelling at the operator.

Once the man calms down, he explains the situation. Apparently, he had hired a sex worker and brought her to his place. After her services were preformed, he refused to pay her due to him not feeling that she did a good enough job to deserve any financial compensation.

Because she was not reviewing her payment, the sex worker refused to leave the house until she had her money and the man was calling to have her removed from the premises. Long story short, the police were sent to the house and both individuals were arrested after admitting to engaging in their activities. If there is a lesson to be learned here, it's to not call 911 on your hooker.

b17pineapple

The Howl

I got an emergency roadside call about 11pm. Im getting some information and I ask where she's located..."I'm directly beneath the moon. They'll see me." And she hung up.

InterstellarBlind

Just hang up....

The list of stupidity is ridiculous. A few of my favorites:

1. Female caller is screaming her absolute head off on picking up the phone. It sounded like her house was on fire and everyone she ever loved was being murdered in front of her eyes. The issue? She had never been in a hailstorm before and it was scary.
2. Male 911 caller says he has a question and no emergency. Ok, go ahead. "Yeah so if I'm driving and the speed limit sign says 40 and I'm going 42, is that like....speeding?" ....Yes. "Ok that makes sense, thanks."
3. Male caller says his friend accidentally shot himself in the leg in the car. After getting a bunch of info, we go down the medical side of things and I get to the question "is the bleeding serious?" - male, "I can't tell." - ok, is it spurting or pouring out? - "I can't see, I need to take his pants off...BRO DON'T MOVE I NEED TO TAKE OFF YOUR PANTS!" - me, what? No, no with his pants ON, I need you to tell me if he is bleeding! Only time I openly laughed on a 911 call.

I have more!

InconceivableWords

"hey there's this car on fire!" 

I work with a lot of police officers. I got ragged shamelessly for calling in a panic one day and yelling incoherently about a car in a parking lot.

I was driving home and there was an SUV that was on fire at an abandoned gas station but somehow I forgot to tell the dispatcher that the CAR WAS ON FIRE and just kept yelling that the car was dangerous and someone could be killed by this parked car....

...they finally calmed me down enough to ask why it was so dangerous and I was like "what? It's on fire! It could blow up! Or cause a forest fire!" I could hear the dispatcher rolling his eyes as he told me I should've started with "hey there's this car on fire!" versus "I'm at a gas station and there's this parked car." I was 17 or 18, I know better now.

seventhirtytwoam

Thaw it Out

I was once called to a woman's house who said she was trapped inside in the middle of winter. I showed up at her home to find that there was a 3 quarter inch of ice stopping her screen door from opening. I opened the door mildly hard and broke the ice to open the screen door.

killakam86437

Not my Issue

The most recent one was a woman requesting someone respond to adjust her air mattress because she was having difficulty falling asleep.

I had a kid call once on Christmas Eve, upset because his dad wouldn't let him open his gifts early. That one was pretty cute, the dad was embarrassed but it was one of my favorite calls.

quack_quack_moo

Runaway

A woman called from the big city in our area that was about 11 miles away and complained that her 18 year old daughter wouldn't go to school. The operator explained that her daughter was an adult and couldn't be forced to go to school. The mom called back two more times to complain about and and called back a fourth time to say that her daughter had now run away.

Goodeyesniper98

EMERGENCY!!

When I was 3 I called 911 because my toy ball was stolen.

It was awkward when the police came and my parents had to explain the situation.

yesIdofloss

Lost Faith

My wife has the story of the woman who called because her baby wasn't breathing.

"Ma'am", she says, "How many children are in the house"

"1", the caller replies, "WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME THAT MY BABY ISN'T BREATHING"

"Ma'am, is that crying I hear on the line your baby?"

"YES MY BABY IS CRYING BECAUSE SHE CANNOT BREATHE!!!"

My wife of course had already dispatched the ambulance, but apparently the baby had just been crying for an hour and this woman was convinced the baby could not cry and breath at the same time.

Also, the amount of people who called with an upset stomach was boggling. Like, go take a crap guys.

Her stories about that job really did a number on my faith in humanity.

ITworksGuys

When you gotta go....

One time my sister and I were in an argument and I wasn't talking to her. She came home late at night and I happened to be in the bathroom with the door open. All she could see was my feet sticking out as our toilet was sectioned off.

She ended up calling 911, scared as hell that someone had broken into our house and decided to use the bathroom. I went into my room without saying a word. She figured it out moments before the cops arrived. Needless to say, one of the most embarrassing moments of her life.

ravingrosie

Thanks OnStar

My mom used to work at the emergency line for OnStar and would often receive reports of suspicious cars, & OnStar would have too notify the police whenever someone would call about that, which makes sense.

However a lot of people would call, "Theres a green car on the highway and it looks suspicious."

No other details than that, and she would have to call the police, too tell them "We got a call about a suspicious green car.

Grapesoda2223

The Scarf

Im not a first responder but i was a security guard at a hospital and we got called in to stop a woman from hanging herself with her scarf. When we got there she was on the floor and the scarf tied onto the seat of a chair.

deckhandPicasso

School is a 911

This is a true store, a kid calling so he could get help on his home work lol.

2Kxclush

Lol heard that call. The dispatcher was so nice, he asked him what he needed help with, lol. The mom yelled the kids name in anger when she heard what he was doing. I bet he got a huge lecture. The kid remembered if he needed help to call 911, just forgot the emergency part, lol.

Fireyredheadlady

Halloween

Where do I begin? Halloween night some lady called 911 because she lost her car keys, said she "wasn't sure if she was calling the right number." We've had people call asking for directions, reporting a black teen walking down the street; that person got hung up on. Someone called to report a suspicious vehicle on their street and it turned out to be our police car... which was marked.

Thinblue138

I know you....

Not a 911 operator but I have called quite a few times for one stupid reason (it's 999 in the UK but whatever). My phone has a feature where I double tap the lock screen button and it calls 999, and a single tap happens to be snooze for the alarm. Just like anyone else I set an alarm to wake to for my Uni classes everyday and a BUNCH of times I ended up double tapping somehow and the same lady would pickup and I'd tell her it was a mistake. Once she even recognized my voice cuz it happened so often and she cut me off and asked if it was a mistake lol. Luckily she was nice and the calls didn't affect anyone because they lasted only a few seconds.

MrLoneSausage

The Leaves of Evil....

Former 911 operator and the STUPIDEST calls I would get were people complaint about leaf blowers. Yes. I worked in an affluent city and it was always the same pretentious people that called to complain about landscapers their neighbors hired using leaf blowers too early in the morning. It got so bad the city was forced to pass an ordinance restricting the use of leaf blowers before a certain time in the morning.

brystalicious

"frequent flyers"

Most annoying today? Or overall? We routinely deal with the worst side of people and deal with daily/hourly annoying calls.

Some of the worst are the "frequent flyers". Multiple alcoholics in town call regularly for rides home. People calling on their neighbors for literally everything. People treating us like information and being fools when we tell them we aren't.

Think about the worst, most annoying tattle tail you remember from school.... They are worse now that they grew up and they rarely call about actual emergencies.

Rman367

Madame President

Not a dispatcher but i work in a jail. This is what we saw on the call notes for a call that came into dispatch recently.

RP lives in insert super expensive neighborhood name

RP saw police car drive by, wants to know whats happening with her people

RP stating she is president of HOA and has legal right to know

RP transferred to deputy.

Kell5232