Everyone... EVERYONE should sometime in their life wait tables. It's not a lazy person's job or a stupid person's job. It takes skill and stamina and PATIENCE! We forget when we are customers that our wait staff are humans. They aren't Superheroes or servants. And special requests are getting out of hand!
Redditor u/Graceful_Swan_Ronson wanted the servers of the world to hold hands and let go by wondering.... Waiters/Waitresses of Reddit, what's the most ridiculous request you've gotten from a customer at your restaurant?
Who is still drinking Corona?
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Early 2000's.
Working in an Italian restaurant, this one cat insists he needs lime juice for his meal. As we're an Italian restaurant, we don't have any on hand for our menu items, but the bar should have some. Thinking out loud I mention that the kitchen doesn't have any, but the bar throws those into bottles of Corona, so I might be able to get some there.
Customer: Are you going to charge me for that?
Me: No, I think I can get a garnish for you.
So I come back with the lime and he looks confused.
Customer: Where's the Corona?
Me: I'm sorry - you said you wanted the lime? Did you want to order a Corona as well?
Customer: Yeah I want one, you said you wouldn't charge me.
Leading into a back-and-forth wherein he's upset I didn't bring him a free Corona with his free lime, because he misunderstood me. official_fox_news
That's a whole lotta ranch!
A Mom and young son (maybe 8?) came in to the restaurant I waited tables at for lunch. The Mom asked her son what he wanted to eat, and he replied with "ranch."
I politely asked if he meant, like, a salad with ranch? Or French fries with a side of ranch?
The Mom looked at me, rolled her eyes in embarrassment, and clarified—he wanted a soup bowl full of ranch dressing...
I walked into the kitchen and discussed with my manager, because I had no idea how to enter that into our POS system. My manager and I came to the conclusion that we should charge her for an entire bottle of ranch, so she paid $10.99 for a soup bowl full of ranch dressing. (Yuck) Dpg2304
Smile!
I've had an older gentleman ask me to smile so he could see my teeth. He told me I had really nice teeth and looked like I took care of them.
He was with his adult son who then apologized and informed me that his dad was a dentist but has alzheimer's so he didn't mean to be weird. shannibearstar
This isn't a buffet!
> Oysters!
I explained we are a burger joint, no oysters. He takes off his coat, talks to his date, then stares at me for a second.
> Oysters!
I explain again, no oysters.
> Two dozen! Oysters!
After a third and fourth time where he barks an order at me, then acts all busy so he 'can't hear' my response, I stop and stare at him. He asks again, I just stare, he asks again, I just stare. He finally makes eye contact with me. "Sir, we are a burger joint, no oysters." He is finally forced to acknowledge me.
> So go get some!
We were in a casino, we were the only restaurant open at 2AM, he knew this but expected me to run around to some closed restaurant and grab raw shellfish them just happen to be hosting during closed hours. connaught_plac3
I Can be Bought!
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Working as a server (17ish) had a drunk lady ask to give her a ride home. I finished up closing out my section and gave her a ride because I knew the area pretty well. She was really nice and everything, but had a couple drinks too many and her friends had already left a little earlier and she was too embarrassed to make a scene or call someone. She gave me $50 and I was stoked. sean__christian
Not Wet!
I haven't waited tables in about 10 years now but I'll never forget the guy who asked for his steak "dry." When I pressed him for what he wanted explicitly he explained that he wanted "no juice" to come out when he was eating it. I told him it would take about 30 minutes to cook his steak that done, he said that was fine and off I went. Our steaks were pretty miserable portions in the first place, and the cut he ordered was the smallest one on the menu, so when I returned with his tiny little 6 oz flat iron that had been absolutely desiccated on the grill he looked understandably disappointed. He took a few bites of it and decided "it wasn't very good," which was underselling how bad it looked and almost certainly how bad it tasted. panascope
Don't Whine!
I worked in a wine store in a dying shopping mall owned by a local winery We had this 'wine club' program and I'm pretty sure this couple were the only active members.
But the level of entitlement these people had was something else. We'd offer samples of a few of different types - usually a Pinot Grigio or a Chardonnay, a merlot, and maybe a riesling or a fruit wine or something that was mass produced and inexpensive.
These people would come in and start ordering me around, would start demanding samples of this Cabernet Sauvignon that cost $80 a bottle (which we never sampled for obvious reasons). The guy would drink the strawberry wine and start critiquing it like he's a sommelier or something. Once a quarter the winery sent out coupons to its members where if you bought one bottle, you got another one half price - the woman always tried to buy a $15 bottle then get the $80 bottle for half price. It became this quarterly fight she'd try to pick.
They'd always try to pull this right at closing time, too, which is really when I lost patience for it. Weird_Map_Guy
Chicken Forever!
Not a server, but I used to be a line cook. I once had a server come back to my saute station and tell me she was about to ring in a chicken dish and the guy specifically wanted it just overcooked to oblivion. I cooked it like I normally would, then I microwaved it for three full minutes, then I held it in tongs and burned the crap out of it directly on the burner flame. I was totally ok with getting reprimanded for overdoing by a mile. She came back to me a while later and told me that the guy insisted that she thank me because it was the best piece of chicken he'd ever eaten. It was basically the food equivalent of finding out that some guys like to hire women to step on them in high heels. I was absolutely blown away. ebimbib
Honey... it's only lettuce....
Table of two. They both ordered the same thing.
Lady A wanted to add a salad. Sure, it will cost extra though. She said that was fine. Lady B then decided that she also wanted a salad.
At the end lady B wanted to know why she was being charged for a salad. Only lady A was told that salads cost extra. nsa_k
Gimme that Baileys!
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Friend of mine went to Cheese Cake Factory and ordered a "coffee with bailey's in it" for dessert. Took ages. Server comes back and confirms. More time goes by - the cook comes out and confirms.
Finally the waitress comes back with a cup of coffee with two bay leaves in it. I can only imagine how confused they were putting that one together. AdequateSteve
There is no BOGO here!
Some old woman got mad at me because I told her that I wouldn't substitute the side on her meal for ANOTHER MEAL. Like she wanted $16 Meal A, and for her free side, she wanted $18 Meal B, but with absolutely no upcharge.
She was like "Wow really, you're not going to do that for me? Are you serious?!" I was busy and didn't have time to play stupid games so I just said "No, I'm not going to do that for the price of one meal. You can order both meals if you'd like." She started up again until her daughter was like "Mom KNOCK IT OFF."
Bonus story about requesting only female servers: Another guy always refused a male server and requested a female one. If all of them were busy he would demand the female manager wait on him. He was always pissy and he'd try to play word games with us, presumably because he was lonely and miserable. He'd make up his own names for the dishes we served and refused to tell us what he actually wanted. One time I had him, he kept telling me he wanted a "large bistro-style salad," something that's not on our menu. I was sick of his crap so I said "Sure thing Frank, I'll go get it right now" and walked away. He was like "Wait!" because he obviously knew we didn't have such a thing. I just kept walking and told my manager I wasn't serving him anymore. She went over and chewed him out in front of a full dining room, so that was cool. GiveHerTheWorks
Wanna wear the ketchup?
"Can you make some organic ketchup?"
ME : "Ms, I'm pretty sure all our ketchup is organically soure--"
"You 'guess'?! What f**king good is that to me?!"
ME : "Uh.. I beg your--"
"How hard is it to purée tomatoes into a f**king ketchup?! Where is your head chef?!"
I ended up, at the chef's behest, bringing her a small dipping dish of ketchup from a bottle. I got a "See!! How hard was that?!" For a tip too lol crochetprozac
This is 'RED LOBSTER,' it's probably just from a can sweetie!
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I had a customer ask what region the lobster was from in our lobster bisque, because he was allergic to shellfish but only from a certain ocean. All I could think as we had to call the head chef at home to ask about lobster source regions was that maybe the guy could...not eat the bisque. erikarew
This isn't 'The Vagina Monologues.'
I was 21. I had a 60+ year old lady tell me she had her clitoris and nipples pierced, and asked me to look at them... in the restaurant. It was so weird, that the table next to them apologized on her behalf.
She also didn't tip well, I'm assuming, because I declined looking at her piercings. CHUNKY_BLOODY_QUEEFS
Happily Ever After... if she survived the proposal.
I waited on a young couple one night, and before they ordered, the guy pulled me aside and explained to me that he was planning on proposing to his girlfriend during dinner, and had a special request: he wanted to give me the ring to give to the chef, so that he could insert it into whatever it is she ordered, so that she would find it while eating her meal. I explained to the guy that I didn't think the chef or my boss would go for that idea as her potentially swallowing or choking on the ring was a pretty big liability risk, to which the guy responded, "Don't worry I won't blame you guys if she chokes, and if she swallows it, we'll get it back!"
Just to humor the guy, I asked the chef and my boss about the guy's request and, despite his verbal waiver of liability, they confirmed that we couldn't honor it. As an alternative, I suggested maybe ordering her favorite cocktail and then I could place the ring around a straw or stirrer in the drink before I brought it out to her, but he replied that that wouldn't work because she wasn't 21. He ended up proposing more conventionally, and she said yes, and now 20+ years later I sometimes wonder whatever became of them and how their marriage turned out. VictorBlimpmuscle
Can't you cry outside?
This didn't happen to me personally, but was a story my Trainer told me.
He used to work in some really fancy restaurants where when your table requests something, you make damn sure it happens. The example he gave is a younger married couple came and sat in his section and the entire time their toddler is constantly complaining and whining about McDonald's chicken nuggets. No amount of food or drink could shut this kid up. He informs his tables he would be back in 5 min and to ask another server if they had needed anything for a few minutes.
He comes back no longer than 5 minuets with a Happy Meal for the kid.
From what I was told, that man's tip was WELL over 20%. BuddysGenes
I Hate Tuesdays!
I bartended all through college at this bayside bar in Ocean City, MD.
Every Tuesday, we had "Senior Deck Party," where we'd set up a free buffet with all the mushy foods you can think of. The seniors would come through, grab a couple happy hour drinks, gorge on potato salad, and head out.
There was this one lady named Rose that would come, take up 2 seats at the bar (one for her and one for her purse) and sit there all day, demanding the following: A ginger ale in a highball glass with 2 orange slices, one lime slice, a lemon slice, 3 cherries, and 2 straws.
She never touched the fruit, it was only a status thing, and I was supposed to fill up her ginger ale every time it got to half a glass to restore carbonation. Any bartender will tell you, fruit is a precious commodity. This routine caused me extreme mental anguish.
I should also add, SHE NEVER TIPPED. frothyminx
To each they own...
Back when I used to work in a restaurant I had a couple... but this is one that still sticks out in my mind.
One lady wanted her salad microwaved so the cheese would melt. I confirmed a couple of times, she wanted the entire salad, dressing, veggies, everything microwaved for melted cheese. It was a disgusting droopy mess, but she happily ate it. PNW-Tec
This is not a full fetish Buffet Lady!
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Posed this before in /r/TalesFromYourServer
Had a waitress work for me that came to me about a table of guys in her section. 3 of them were teasing the 4th guy b/c he has a foot fetish and they wanted to buy the servers socks for him (his B-Day). She came to me and asked if she could sell them for $50 (their offer). First I asked if she was offended or disgusted by it, she was laughing and teasing about it, no worries she said. I told her this, "Tell the guys it's $100 and they should tip 100% as well. They did just that."
Now the interesting part: She would sell this guy her socks every few weeks and also sell them online for fetishists. She said she was making really good money doing this as a side income.
Interesting world we live in. GeckoFlameThrower
Here you go half Pint!
Gentleman ordered half a pint of San Miguel. Looks at his half-pint glass in disgust, then at me in disgust, and asks for it in a "man glass." infinitespacegoat
I hope you poured that half pint into a pitcher and brought that back to him. HutSutRawlson
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.