It takes a lot of trust to get a tattoo. After all, you're walking into a shop and telling someone you barely know, "Hey, can you please alter my body with ink? Also, don't mess it up or it will follow me around forever, haunting my very existence." Except, sometimes you do mess it up and it does follow you around forever. Most tattoo artists are skilled enough to work around their mistakes and cover them up, but some are too big to fix and that's what the following entries are all about.
*The following article contains discussion of suicide/self-harm.
Reddit user, u/T_S_Sean, wanted to hear:
What A Tribute
I tattoo with my best friend. They wanted a tribute for their dog that passed and I had sketched a couple of designs up in my spare time. One night we were bored and decided to take their favorite sketch and slap it on them. It was supposed to read "Little James" with a little cartoon version of their dog beneath.
But the sketch read "Litte James" and we both failed to notice because the font was so stylized. Neither of us realized it was misspelled for 3 months! We're still best friends and love telling the story. They owe me a misspelled tattoo now and I honestly cannot wait!
Yoar Gonna Love It
Not the artist, am the oops. Got some lyrics tattooed on me, but "your" became "yoar" - I suspect he was aiming to go over the O but did the U instead.
Result was crying me, guilt from him and almost 3.5 years of free laser removal to fix. I have gotten tattoos from him after that but have since moved.
A Permanent Oopsie
My dad once brought a tattoo gun from a weird website. Once he got it he wanted to see if it worked by drawing a small line in his palm. Oh it worked. But now he has a permanent small line on his palm. He never touched that gun ever again
"Punce" Up, Not Down
I knew a girl who had a tattoo of boxing gloves that said "Roll with the punces" (obviously supposed to be punches.) I pointed it out to her and she didn't care at all. Apparently she really was good at rolling with the punces. And no I'm not kidding.
You Learn To Live With It
Not an artist but have two experiences of this:
- An almost moment in my first tattoo. Told the guy I wanted a quote from LOTR, from Aragorn's prophecy "not all those who wander are lost"
When he showed me the sketch it said wOnder not wAnder.
It's an easy/common mistake to make but it completely changes the meaning and is a mis-quote. Luckily I caught it and decided to lose the wording in any event!
2. I had the tattoo, a bird, done in 2 sessions. First session we did the line work and discussed colour, I said I wanted it as colourful as possible. As we'd already discussed it, I thought it was covered.
Second session about 3/4 weeks later, he starts on the tattoo and he gets out mostly brown and grey inks. I didn't realise until it was too late that those weren't just colours for the more "shadowy" parts, that was the whole tattoo!
Tried to convince myself that I liked it, but after 3 or 4 years I've now accepted that I don't like the colours or really the design itself and I've had it lasered so it can be covered up by another artist.
There Is No Reason Why You Should Be Inking People
Holy sh-t. I bought a tattoo gun like 15 years ago and with no training just started going hell bent on myself and then my friends.
My thighs are literally covered with indecipherable crap that then gets slightly better as it works it way down towards my knees. Over the course of a few weeks I got slightly better and told this guy I could do a tribal sleeve LOL. F-cking way beyond my scope. I had no business putting a needle near anyone else's skin. The dude was flabby and I hadn't worked on flabby people before and it was all different. Basically it was a big f-cking mess and the guy was filthy, always covered in dirt so it got badly infected. So at least after that I realized I could really hurt someone and stopped.
Not All Machines Are Perfect
F-cked up some biomech on a guys f-cking HAND about 15 years ago. Still haunts me
What's biomech? I don't have any tattoos so I don't know if this is an industry term or what. Genuinely curious.
It's a style. Biomechanical. Basically integrating man with machine.
Maybe We Should Go Back To Teaching Cursive In Schools...
Had a close friend getting his first tattoo. Kind of an uptight guy. Our mutual bud is an illustrator and he calls him over and explains that his appointment for the tattoo is in 30 minutes and he asks that our bud write, in calligraphy, the word "home" to be copied by the tattoo artist. Although hurried our bud reluctantly does so.
Friend goes to the tattoo parlor and I see him late that night. He proudly pulls down his shirt to show me the word "home" written big on his chest in calligraphy.
But here's the thing: in cursive, unless you're really careful, an "e" is almost indistinguishable from an "o".
So I'm looking at my uptight friend, and he has in big floral writing the word "HOMO" tattooed on his chest.
I swore in that moment that I would never mention it to him — maybe that's wrong. But I'll bet I'm not the only of his friends who've noticed it.
Okay, Seriously, Stop Getting Hammered And Then Tattooing
I do a lot of home tattoos. Got a machine not too long ago, but had done stick n pokes since I was like 15. So it's trashy/punk/diy/whatever, but it's fun and I got pretty decent at it, especially with words.
My girlfriend and I got hammered one night and decided to get three numbers we both love tattooed on us.
She did mine first, went off without a hitch. Looks as great as it can with very little background on her part.
It was my turn to tattoo her now and that's when I realized I forgot that 9 doesn't face right, like P.
She laughed at my stupidity and she just wanted me to black out the spot with a little box and do the number a little below it to make it look stylized.
NBD because it was my gf and done in a diy front room, but still was a stupid-a-- mistake and I can't imagine doing that to someone who isn't that close to me.
It's Not What You Think
There was a guy I worked with that wanted bada-- written on his arm in cursive. He went to a new shop that just opened up.
It looked like it said beepuss.
Not One Big Part, But Lots Of Smaller Parts
i literally mess up almost every time i tattoo. i'm not a pro and i have no training or license and i TELL EVERYONE THAT but because i'm a good artist people still beg me to tattoo them. so i do simple things like outlines and words that can be fixed even if i f-ck up bad (which i haven't yet) but every time there are definitely a few shaky lines or f-cked up parts of the tattoo.
yeah i know i shouldn't tattoo people if i have no training, but i know enough to be sanitary and i warn them that i will probably f-ck up a little bit and people are still okay w it so whatever
Not me, but a friend
He bought a kit from somewhere and tattooed random people (unlicensed)
What people didn't know was that he was terrible at art and horrible at basic spelling
So many people took him to small claims to get money back
My favorite? He tried spelling "believe" Resulted in "Bellievie"
It's Easy To Take One On The...Cin?
I knew a girl who had a tattoo of boxing gloves that said "Roll with the punces" (obviously supposed to be punches.) I pointed it out to her and she didn't care at all. Apparently she really was good at rolling with the punces. And no I'm not kidding.
AND NO ONE SAID ANYTHING?
I once had a woman come in when I worked at a walk in shop. She had her whole family with her. She was getting her first tattoo at 70+(can't remember exact age). She was getting something that included the birth-death dates of her recently deceased husband. Her whole family saw the design. They were really excited. Let me repeat, the whole family saw the design. So I do the tattoo, the woman loves it, and then her daughter sneaks back over while I'm tearing down.
She whispers to me that her mother had gotten the dates wrong. I felt so bad. They even knew she had dementia problems apparently, and no one looked at it closely enough to see if she had gotten the dates correct. Unfortunately it wasn't dates that could easily be changed to another number. I told them I could cover it after she healed but I never saw them again :/
I got a tattoo apprenticeship as a teenager and a few of my friends got small tattoos by me. One night, very high, directly after my sweet 16 (I was still in my dress) I was tattooing a friend of mine who wanted "Eventually Everything Will End" written up her ribcage. Halfway through the Eventually we realize i've gone slightly off transfer and the whole thing is crooked. I am mortified. My blood ran cold, I imagined she'd hate me forever. Her boyfriend at the time just said "Just add a dot dot dot and make it mysterious, like "Eventually.." like you're trailing off' She looks at me and says "Dot dot dot me up" and I do. She loved that tattoo, even got it inscribed on a zippo.
Shortly after my 22nd birthday she committed suicide. As a tribute several of her friends got the word "Eventually..." tattooed in her honor, as if to say eventually we may see each other again. My worst f-ck up, one of my best memories. Miss you Kait
(If you ever feel like ending it all, please reach out to someone. Depression is a liar and you will be missed more than you understand)
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
The key to any successful relationship is communication.
The ability to be open and receptive to what a significant other has to say, as well as the ability to be able to convey something weighing on one's mind, can be healing.
But depending on the circumstance, some things are better left unsaid.
Curious to hear examples of what those might be, Redditor FamiliarFarmer8356 asked:
"What's something you wish you could tell your partner without upsetting them?"
If there is conflict, there is a way to discuss and address the issue in a civil and respectful manner.
Things Just Happen
"Every bad thing that happens doesn't require someone to be blamed for it. And that someone doesn't always have to be me."
A Cornerstone Of A Successful Union
"One of the cornerstones of a good marriage, is knowing how to argue. I’d actually say that before a couple get married, they should check how their potential partner behaves in an argument. What are they like when they get angry. It’s important because no two individuals are going to agree all the time. And on those occasions, it’s important to remember not to belittle the other. Deal with the issue at hand. And especially, don’t argue in front of the kids. You have no idea how much lasting damage this causes."
"All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest - never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principles of equal partnership."
It's Not That Deep
"please stop complaining about everything."
"If you keep seeking out reasons to be miserable, you will find them."
"I'm tired of being dragged down with you."
There's no need to get defensive when there's something to discuss.
It's Not About You
"That some days I’m just tired from class and work and just want some me time, it’s not that I hate you my social battery is just running out."
"Her first reaction to something adverse doesn't have to be anger."
In The Words Of A Pirate
"In the wise words of captain Jack Sparrow sometimes:"
'the problem is not the problem, the problem is your attitude toward the problem.'
It Takes Two To Tango
"That I wish she’d be more independent so she didn’t need my help for everything outside the house."
"That it’s a little disturbing how aggressively he drives when he’s grumpy… heavy on both gas and brakes, zooming in and out of traffic, swearing at people who make mistakes… very unlike him."
Sometimes the truth hurts when talking about members of the family.
A Real Assessment
"That her mother is not a good person."
"I told my husband that it's not that his family is nosy and overbearing, it's that I hate watching him cave and negotiate as if they have a right to behave like this, and I really hate when I'm the bad guy for wanting reasonable limits."
"It got worse, then it got better, FYI."
"His parents are greedy, selfish people and treat him like an atm."
There's definitely a fine line between withholding your thoughts to protect the person you love and being brutally honest.
If coming clean isn't going to resolve an issue, then it might be better to suck it up and deal with whatever frustrations you have about the other person.
It's up to you, but make sure the delivery doesn't come from a place of rage if you do decided to be totally transparent about your negative thoughts.
Every family has a black sheep or every family in its entirety are black sheep.
What is a "black sheep" anyway?
It used to mean a person who brought shame or embarrassment to a family, but it's more often used now to mean the member who is just very different from everyone else—sometimes in a good way.
Redditor Frozen_yoghurt123 asked:
"Who is the 'black sheep' of your family?"
I'm the black sheep or at least I'd like to think so.
"Probably my dad's cousin, who went to prison for murdering his lover's husband."
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"My Dad. He is the only one of 6 siblings who wasn't a huge f**k up. And yet, before my Grandma died she stated that he was her 'biggest disappointment.' He is estranged from his surviving siblings... not by his choice. It honestly blows my mind."
"Toxicity is often a group mindset thing; people don't want you to leave because they are dysfunctionally co-dependent on each other and need each other to justify their own shortcomings in life. A lot of the 'family loyalty' stuff is typically shouted loudest by those who are the least good idea to stay loyal towards."
"My great uncle who stole my great grandfathers identity, stole a couple million dollars, and ran off. No one even knew he was alive until my great grandfathers funeral in 2009. No one has seen him since. My grandma started to cry because she honestly thought he was dead."
"Everyone else just kind of nodded on his direction and went on with the rest of the funeral. I just remember being very confused because I was 9 and I had never met this guy who my dad pulled me aside and told me he was my great uncle. It was a few years later that I got the full story."
"According to my mean aunt, the 'matriarch' in her own mind, it's my twin brother because "he doesn't care about family now that he's a doctor." (He's a resident. Chief resident. He works ridiculous hours and spends the rest of the time recovering from work.)"
"According to my ex-MIL (who still counts because she's Son's grandma), it's me, for divorcing her son."
"According to everyone else, it's Mean Aunt. The rest of us are warm and caring and compassionate. We have our moments; all of us have been accidentally thoughtless or done something selfish once in a while, but we're not deliberately mean and snarky all the time."
"My immediate family are the black sheep of the entire family."
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Sounds like everyone has a little black sheep in them.
"By now, my brother for cutting off everyone because he prefers his rude, selfish, paranoid, narcissist wife over all of us."
"My wife is the black sheep of her family in the sense that she's the only one who isn't a rude, selfish, paranoid narcissist."
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"Me. My granddaddy told me 'I’ve only had the sheriff knock on my door two times in my 80 years, and both times he was looking for you! 'I did some dumb sh*t, caused a little trouble, burned a few bridges but always managed to stay out of jail. Partly because my sister has kept an attorney on retainer for me since I was 16."
"My younger brother (2nd of 4) is a compulsive liar and it got him in a lot of little trouble as a teen, then he told his wife he graduated a big college when we're not even sure if he got his GED because he failed to graduate HS, went to some GED school and eventually just stopped going."
"IF he graduated college, he never mentioned he was going in the 4+ years it takes nor mention graduation or have a diploma. He's not a bad dude, but now family time is super awkward when he and his wife are talking about 'their' college team."
The NOT good girl...
"My aunt's daughter. She’s been in jail for drugs, stolen money from my aunt and other family members to use on drugs and physically abused my aunt. My aunt has tried getting her help, but nothing has worked. She’s just not a good person, and everyone in my family, except my aunt, doesn’t want anything to do with her. I haven’t seen her in 8 years now, and I’m happy about that."
"A former nun - my great aunt - left the religious life and got married. She called herself 'the black sheep of the family' because her habit was black."
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Well the black sheep sound like the most interesting family members.
Sex is great, but there are more ways than one to accomplish that euphoric feeling without sex.
There are so many small, ordinary aspects of life that can just send a person and we come across them daily.
A good steak.
A home repair.
The things that make you say...
"I tingle all over."
Redditor OldAboba asked:
"What is the best non-sexual physical feeling you’ve ever felt?"
Adele. Adele live. She sends me.
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"I got a professional full body (everything but my man parts) massage a few years back for the first and so far only time at a spa after the recommendation from a coworker. I felt like I was floating on a cloud for the next few days."
Through your nose...
"Sneezing when you're sick. Then you get that about 20 second feeling of breathing through your nose again and you like ahh that's what I aspire to at the moment."
"Or the very last sneeze of your illness. During a fire drill in high school, I was ambling out after fighting a head old for a few days. The alarm was killing my head which was already throbbing from the sinus pressure."
"I was nearing the field, well away from my classmates, when I cough/sneezed out a huge, green loogie - cleared it about three feet, no icky trail - and by the time I was walking back to the building I was feeling pretty much back to normal. No more head cold after that. Never had something like that ever happen again where there was such an abrupt end to the head cold."
"Right after a migraine goes away. It's almost a spiritual experience."
"This was going to be my answer. I was in the ER one time for a really bad migraine. They gave me what they called a 'migraine cocktail.' When they pushed it through the IV I could feel the cold liquid make its way through my body, up to my head. Once it hit my brain, the migraine was gone. It was pure ecstasy. Even better was that cocktail had Benadryl in it so I fell asleep not long after and slept so good."
"That stretch til you shake when you wake up."
"I once stretched too hard in the morning and got the worst calf cramp ever... it looked like a prune and I thought I would die from the pain. Couldn't stretch in bed for months afterwards out of fear it would happen again."
"When you move over 50, it turns into that stretch til you put your back into a muscle spasm that lasts days."
The ItchScratching Feel Good GIF by 60 Second DocsGiphy
"I had a cast and splint on both my legs for 2 months. When they cut it off, they scratched my legs for me and the itch was just top notch! Yeah."
Itching an itch can change a life.
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"When you're starving all day and devour a bomb a** meal."
Sleep for Life
"When you’ve been up for 20 hours+ and finally get into bed and you just know it’ll be the best sleep of your life."
"But man, after 36+ hours, the body sort of aches and it's hard to fall asleep despite being completely exhausted. Then the restless legs kick in... ugh. I do agree that a 20hr-ish stint is amazing to cuddle into, especially if you don't have to get up at any specific time the next day."
"Makes it better when you’ve been sleep deprived for weeks and know you have NO PLANS tomorrow and can sleep as much as you need."
"When you're absolutely busting for a pee and you can finally go!"
"Apparently there’s a thing called a 'pee-gasm' that people (usually women) have that causes an orgasmic feeling when you pee after holding it for a while! I’ve definitely experienced this and I’ve intentionally waited a while so I could have that good feeling... lol."
I Can Hear!!
"The feeling of water leaving your ear after being there all day."
"I had some impacted earwax for a week in one ear, and when it finally got removed it was the best feeling in the world. Initially it was like having a tv or radio in my ear that only had static, but then I could hear. Good god, I could hear. It was amazing."
"Oh man, and it’s WARM from being in your head, and the warmth makes the sensation of leaving even better."
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"Sleeping in a warm blanket in winters."
"Or sleeping in a cold blanket in summer."
I am enthralled by all of those things.
People need to stop throwing out unwanted advice.
And when it is requested, think before you speak.
People with mental disorders don't need everyone telling them they have a fix like "exercise" or "herbal supplements."
Redditor Gold-Ad-2827 asked:
"People with mental disorders: What do you hate being told the most?"
I hated being told to just smile. You smile and go away.
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"It's all in your head. Where else would it?! My colon?"
"Everybody goes through that."
"This saying makes my blood boil. Or the 'I was that age once too ya know' yeah no sh*t you were that age once. And just because you were that age once doesn’t mean we have the same experience."
"They try to minimize it."
"You're worried? Just stop."
"You're sad? Just don't be."
"You're compulsively binge eating? Eat less."
"Thanks for that stellar advice."
"Or even better, 'Just do it!' As if ADHD paralysis can be stopped with a can-do attitude."
"I get so frustrated when people treat the idea of 'holistic medicine' as some kind of woo. How does it escape so many people that the body works holistically? Even a lot of doctors seem to ignore this. It's very frustrating when you have 2 or 3 or 4 illnesses that are all affecting each other, and your 'physical health' is held distinct from your mental health, and nothing anyone is doing to treat you works because no one's looking at the whole system."
"I just got a lecture from a psychiatrist I am seeing about nutrition, and he apologized to me for doing so but I told him, 'No, I appreciate it. Do it for all your patients.' because it told me he's trying to look at the whole picture and actually fix what's wrong. It gave me faith in him."
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"You need to calm down."
"Never is the history of calm down has calm down ever caused anyone to calm down."
Calm down. I hate that one. You calm down.
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"When they try to give me tips on what to do, like bruh as if I didn't already try that."
"You don't look sad. No crap... that's so I can avoid having this conversation. Also depression isn't 'being sad' like people think."
"God, I hate this. It's because saying 'I'm depressed' has been standard for people expressing that they're slightly unhappy about something dumb like not getting enough croutons on their salad or some crap. Now that's just what everyone assumes you mean when you say you have depression."
"'Stop being lazy.'"
“'Lazy' is when you don’t want to do anything at all. 'Executive disfunction' is when you can do everything at all, but that one easy quick thing that you do want to do just makes you and your brain freeze completely days ahead. I’m tired of people not understand that even when I explain and look at me like I’m bullshitting instead."
Ways to Cope
"Maybe you should try praying harder. I did, He prescribed medication."
"Praying is a way to cope for a lot of people, I think. That's totally fine, but insisting on praying in lieu of getting real help or actually addressing the issue is when it is not only unhelpful, but dangerously detrimental."
"Religious people will bypass everyone’s cultures, identity, views, and feelings just to be right and make a point. it’s disgusting. I read somewhere that real so called Christianity is all wrong. The real faith is from the Aramaic history and all the meanings were misinterpreted and the stories and all were made up by Catholics wanting to control their people. Yuck."
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"As someone with OCD with a lot of attention to 'contamination', having someone try to explain contradictions in why I'm doing something that is technically unclean when I wouldn't do something that is technically clean due to OCD. There are a few doorknobs that I will not touch no matter how much you clean them in front of me and I know it makes no sense, if it made sense I wouldn't have OCD i'd just be cleanly."
Stop trying to be an armchair therapist. Be empathetic to people first.