Detention, while short in time served, can be long in the lasting effects it has. For some reason time ticks more slowly, like the universe knows you're just a kid who wants to get out. With any luck you learn your lesson and never do the thing that got you detention in the first place. Sometimes, though, the thing you did that got you detention was so ridiculous it shouldn't have had it in the first place.
Reddit user, u/RaresJF, wanted to know what silly thing you did in your childhood that got you placed in the school's klink when they asked:
What was the stupidest way you got a school detention?
When You're The Sucker Who Did Something Right
I was late to school because the school bus didn't pick anyone on my street up. After waiting until after school started (school let everyone know that they were coming just late and didn't have an ETA), my dad said "alright I'm taking you to school. Got to school 30 minutes late and got detention because I didn't wait for the bus to pick me up. The bus showed up 45 minutes later and none of those kids got detention.
But no, I did something responsible...
Unable To Defend Yourself
I just got back to school from getting a tonsillectomy, so I still couldn't talk. The group of kids I was sitting with was being insanely loud one lesson while our teacher was gone, so the substitute gave all of us, myself included, detention for talking excessively.
It was the one and only detention I ever got, and it was BS.
No. Other. Explanation.
I started making a baseball bat on the lathe in wood shop. I was on the schools baseball team (senior year), had an aluminum baseball bat in my locker, but the wood one I was making in shop class could only be a weapon.
No other possible explanation in the schools eyes.
RELEASE...!
Teacher: "You're on a ship heading for the new world. You're excited about the prospect of finding a new place to call home...etc...but you see a rolling mist across the ocean and there's something silhouetted inside of it, tell us what you see"
Me: "The kraken"
Because, What's A Wheelchair Really?
I got a detention for not dressing down in PE, after having major knee surgery. I was in a wheel chair unable to put weight on my leg, and would be like that for 12 weeks. But I was told I still had to dress down everyday, and put my PE uniform on.
My mom nipped that real quick!
The Plural Form Is "Weni"
Called my elbow a weenus in Freshman year.
*Wenis
I'm looking at the W.E.N.I.S. and I'm not happy!
Does It Really Matter How It Was Written?
I refused to use the "four square" method for planning out my draft for a paper in 8th grade. I just prefered to use a bulletin form of it.
Spent two hours in detention with three other guys who thought a four square was dumb.
F.Y.I: a four square is where you literally draw four large squares side to side on a paper. A small rectangle in middle to represent your subject sentence. Top left represents your first paragraph. Top right is your second paragragh. Bottom left is third paragraph. And bottom right is conclusion paragraph.
Correlation Doesn't Mean Causation
Went to kick a soccer ball at the same time as my opponent.
We collided.
I was the one who didn't fall.
Never Trust The New Kid
Somebody wrote on the chalkboard, the (female) teacher decided that "girls wouldn't do something like that" and held all the boys back over recess until someone admitted to it.
We talked it over repeatedly, and were on the verge of having someone just take the blame for the rest of us.
Turns out the new girl did it.
Lesson: You Should Always Be Aware Of The Communists
We had this batsh-t crazy keyboarding teacher who was AT LEAST 80 years old, obsessed with "the communists", paranoid about everything, went on constant rants about nonsense, and would write several of us up almost every period for things like "conspiring" and "secret communication" and "suspected communist leanings". Her name was Mrs. Thomas and she was literally the most senile person ever.
One day she launched into a rant about how her husband served in the army, and, fed up with her sh-t, I sarcastically asked whether it was the Union army or the Confederate one. She wrote me up for "being a smart Alice". (my name is not Alice.)
My high school had an automatic zero-tolerance policy for hate speech of any kind, which included ageism. The mandatory sentence was two days of out-of-school suspension. However, because my grade-level principal thought it was so funny-- she was 40ish and had Mrs. Thomas as a teacher when she attended the high school she now works at, and said she was crazy as a loon even then-- she just gave me a day of detention after school, and made me come work in the grade-level office during my Keyboarding class for the next two days so Mrs. Thomas would /think/ I was suspended.
EDIT: This was my one and only detention my entire high school career. I was a nearly straight-A student who never, ever got into trouble.
H/T: Reddit
