Regretful People Admit The Moment They Realized They Were Dating Someone Dumb

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Some people drew the short end of the common sense stick.

And like it or not, we are bound to cross paths with these people in our lives. We might even accidentally end up on dates or in relationships with them. But is that a dealbreaker?

Redditor Migz968 asked the internet for stories:

At what moment did you realize you were dating an idiot?

Here are some of the answers that made us say, "Oh, honey...."

Homonyms Are Hard

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We were driving around this weird part of Las Vegas and I said, "This is surreal." He said, " I know. It's so real." I repeated, "Surreal" and he repeated, "So. Real."

Not Quite

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Asked him what event resulted in WWI. His response was 9-11. He was serious.

Reindeer Aren't Real

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We were watching Django, and during the winter training montage there is a moment where the camera pans over a herd of reindeer. At that moment my ex said something about how she thought it was weird that they would include reindeer in the movie because it kind of breaks the immersion. I was confused and asked what she meant by that. She went on to explain to me how reindeer weren't real animals and just make believe like characters in a fairy tale (aka Rudolph & the rest of Santas reindeer)

Other Usage

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When she flipped out because her third grader came home with "erect" on a spelling list, and was on the verge of calling the school. She honestly had lived her entire life not knowing "erect" had any other use aside from describing a penis.

Jumped Conclusions

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I dated a guy for about a month until I found out that he didn't realize that women's breasts made actual milk to feed their babies. He thought "breast feeding" was just a way to hold a baby while giving it a bottle.

I told him he was an idiot and he said, with a disgusted sneer, "I didn't know that because I have never known any woman, who had or would, breast feed their child."

Hamburger Helper

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When she thought I was crazy for putting pop tarts in a toaster. Or maybe it was the time she tried making hamburger helper for the first time at 27 years old and called me from the store to ask where they sold the "brown hamburger meat"..... I'm wasting away to nothing...send help. Oh I almost forgot the best part...she's teaching your children right now in a public school.

Meatatarian

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First time was when he told my parents he was a meatatarian because he eats everything. The same guy told me that the bumps on the side of the highway are so blind drivers know when they run off the road. Ah, highschool boyfriends. He was hot though.

The Cat Can't Do It

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I had been dating this girl for a few months and it was Christmas time. We weren't super serious but it was serious enough that I was buying her Christmas presents. I found something for her that was perfect and it had a connection to some funny event involving her and my cat. So I made the present from the cat. I thought I was being cute and she would make the connection. Instead, she got pissed that my cat got her a present and I didn't. I thought she was joking. To make matters worse we were at her parents' place and they backed her up. It was extremely awkward and I realized it wasn't going to work out.

You're On Mars

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When she pointed up at a bluish star and sincerely asked "Is that Earth?"

You Know They're Nouns

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She got me madlibs and when it was her turn to do a noun she asked "What is a noun?" I said "it's a person, place, or thing." There was a long silence as she thought. It went on for so long that I thought she must be thinking of the best noun I had ever heard. Then she said "place."

Backwards Logic

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In high school I was in an extracurricular program after school. There was one portion of it that was pretty much all girls. I dated a girl from this portion all throughout high school. I went to all of their events and helped out. I always wondered why none of the other girls or their parents really talked to me. Right before we graduated I brought it up to her and she told me that she told all of them that I was verbally abusive all the time. When I asked her why she told me it was so no one else would steal me away from her. I broke up with her shortly after.

Backwards Cooking

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She kept trying to put food inside the rolling pin and then trying and flatten it by just rolling it around

Just Backwards

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A roommate of mine was dating this girl... Very cute, super sweet. We were all in the living room watching another roommate play Call of Duty: World at War (it was still new at the time).

She eventually asks if this was based on a true story. We reply that although the specific characters likely didn't exist, the game was based on World War II. Her response: What's World War II?

Are you serious? It was World War F-cking 2!

At one point, she even said "It's not like everyone knows about it!"

Yeah, Katie, the whole world knows about it. It was a World War. And not the first one, either.

Orangenicht

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When he said the colour orange didn't exist, because it was really just pink and red mixed together.

True North

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Was on a hike and was following a trail I had read up on online. We get to a fork and I say "okay now we need to go north". She says "haven't we been this whole time?". Confused, I look at her and ask why she says that. She replies "north is the direction in front of you yeah?"

Still not entirely sure about the origins of that logic...

Huh????

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She tried to argue that we could get to the moon easier if we just built a spaceship that could go underwater, and flew it through the ocean to the moon during the day time rather than straight up.

Space, Man

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We were laying out under the stars and he asked why some were brighter and others dimmer. I told him that there were different sizes, brightnesses and distances away. Confused silence.

"You mean, they're not stuck up there?"

I'm lying there thinking this can't be true. But oh yes, it was. Upon further questioning I found that he believed the night sky was a big dark blanket like thing with stars stuck on it. The fact that our sun was a star also blew his mind and that just like our sun, other stars could have planets? Too much.

I was crushed. I almost broke up with him there and then. But he was very earnest and wanted me to "teach him." So I tried. Two years later and a whole lotta stupid later, we broke up.

Sexism Disguised As Dumb

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He insisted that women cannot be doctors, only nurses (and vice versa.) He said that the two are the exact same thing except one is male and one is female.

Once Again, Homonyms Are Hard

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We were texting back and forth and she said she was 'upsest with Bon Jovi'. I realized that it was a typo and asked why she was upset with Bon Jovi and she said 'No, I love him... I'm upsest with him'

Photo by Jonathan Roger on Unsplash

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