There is nothing more alienating than saying “No" to splitting some avocado toast.
Instagram and Pinterest have ramped up the strength and frequency of food obsessions. There are certain condiments, specific veggies prepared a certain way, and jars of viscous liquids of all sorts that go great on sandwiches.
They all grow so popular and talked about that having something from a food truck can make someone feel a strange, undeserving pride. It's as if one of the nutrients listed should be cultural capital.
Some, however, are left on the sidelines. They simply cannot rouse the taste buds to like the “in" thing. So they access pride through an equal and opposite energy: they trash the food into oblivion on a Reddit forum
deadlydude2448 asked, "What is something a lot of people enjoy that you hate the taste of?"
“Another Round of Ginger Ales, Please”
"I don't care for booze. I live in the UK so this means no social life." -- GoatGoatGadget
"One of my good friends in college didn't drink. Often times I would rinse out my beer bottle and fill it with water for him to carry around at parties. He would even participate in chugging events and nobody ever noticed."
"I do't think people generally would have cared, but he hated answering the 'why don't you drink?' questions that he would inevitably get." -- Xeibra
Steer Clear of Bistros
"Truffles/truffle oil. I can't stand it and people think it's so fancy and great. It's gross." -- hicanipetyourpupper
"God. I agree that a lot, if not all, people that use truffle oil have no idea what they are doing. Especially if they are just gonna straight up add truffle oil onto something and not even try to balance it out. Less is more, for sure." -- Abundantly-Addicted
"Yes thank you! Would burger joints PLEASE stop ruining their perfectly good fries and mac and cheese. I'm beggggiiinnnnggg." -- MsAlyssa
Flakes of Horror
"Coconut. Nature makes it just to frighten me out of eating candy." -- shleppenwolf
"I have personal hate against whoever made coconut water in cans." -- RedDemonCorsair
"Can confirm, one time I was on vacation on a Caribbean island, and we were chillin' on the beach. We spot these dudes coming towards us brandishing machetes and we were all like 'OH SH*T.'"
"But then they all pulled coconuts out and chopped em open with the machetes and gave some to us. Best coconut ever, especially considering I wasn't murdered." -- The3MiteeyLambo
Screw the Microbiome
"Kombucha. Get that fermented cow's p*ss away from me." -- idkjustsomedude
"I liked it okay until I saw where it comes from. I can't stop picturing that disgusting blob they call a 'Mother' and it makes me gag." -- SlapCracklePlop
"It looks like something you'd pull out of an infected sinus cavity." -- Flamboyatron
WHAT IS RANCH DRESSING MADE OF
"Ranch. I can't even stand the smell of that putrid excuse of a sauce!" -- OmniTheProdigy
"The thing with Ranch for me is, I don't think I know what Ranch is. I swear, every where I go to the thing taste different. When I try to go to a store and get some for myself there're like 20 different version of Ranch for each brand."
"And these things range from being utterly disgusting to heavenly tasty." -- Hippobu2
Eggs are cool. Oil is Cool. But Mayo is NOT
"Mayonnaise, absolutely disgusting." -- BentNotBroken12
"It's the devil's semen! Anything with the texture of mayo is a turn off for me." -- xendaddy
"It is vile." -- i_said_no_mayonnaise
Something’s in the Water
"Cucumber. I can taste that sh*t a mile away."
All forms. Sprays, water, lotion doesn't matter, if cucumber in any shape or form is involved, I'm f*cking out." -- TheGodmama
"Yes! Finally someone who shares my hatred."
"I actually bought of bottle of Sprite a few months ago, took a swig and it was cucumber flavour!? The bottle looked exactly the same. It was absolutely rancid." -- surelywolfbeak
"Agree. Apparently their smell is what could also scare cats away. I often thought I am indeed a cat." -- 9december3
Giphy
Thicc
"Milk tastes like phlegm and smells like a barn floor. On this I can not be moved." -- claire_goolihey
"I grew up drinking it. Then left to college, never really had it anymore, then when I came home on break I had a glass or something and thought I was going to die." -- chuullls
No Pineapple, Got It
"Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. Pineapple. It's way too tart, sweet, and sour all at once. Keep it away from me and my pizza." -- TheRebelWarden
A Very Hot Take
"Avocados. They are absolutely horrible. I tolerate guacamole but avocados can f*ck off." -- Hopewolf115
"Avocados are disgusting. Just musty off tasting." -- splintercinder
"Avocados. All slimy and disgusting and tastes like fricking soap." -- asarcasticgirl
Multiple Hypotheses, All Terrible
"Redbull. It smells like urinal cakes." -- just-keep-walkin
"I like red bull. I think I've just discovered a tasty new snack!" -- HoggishPad
"It also smells like Drano. I had a bad clogging situation in my bathroom and it smelled like red bull for like a week after resolving it." -- CLTalbot
Plant-Based and Grotesque
"Cilantro. It tastes like chewing on the seventh circle of hell. It destroys everything it accompanies." -- Buhhfly
"There's a gene that makes cilantro taste like soap to some people." -- ellumenohpee
"I've never tasted a stink bug but the flavor of cilantro really reminds me of the smell those things expel when agitated." -- nicoleyotova
A Scathing Review
"Carp. Tastes more like crap to me." -- ChilliPuller
"Carp is to fish what Velveeta is to cheese." -- kalidava
"Same!! I think fish in general are gross." -- poptarts4me
Going With Your Gut
"Pumpkin flavored anything. A few years in a row, when pumpkin spice season came id be all excited and get pumpkin flavored things."
"And then remember that I HATE pumpkin. I think I've finally come to accept that I hate it. Even pumpkin pie. I much prefer sweet potato pie."
Some Concise, yet Aggressive Views
"Horseradish. It is the edible embodiment of pungent sweaty armpits." -- thebiggsad
"Celery. It ruins every single dish. It's impossible to change my mind." -- zoishiez
"Mushrooms. These disgusting squishy f*ckers." -- poppy_poppin
Pluckin' Up Trash
"BEETS!"
"Before you ask, yes I have had the very best beets prepared by the finest chefs at Michelin rated restaurants and they still taste like god-damn DIRT."
"I get tempted by the gorgeous colors, the addition of goat cheese (my favorite) that maybe this time they will taste different, but no. It is a curse."
-- whipsmade
A Dedicated Few
"White chocolate idk why." -- justanredditacount
"I do too! You're the only person ever to agree with me. You might as well just pour some sugar on some butter and eat that. Super gross." -- kalidava
Rage Against the "All the Rage"
"Sweet potatoes. I hate them. They're literally one of the only things I won't eat." -- MericaMericaMerica
"Yes especially when they're made into 'fries.' I swear people only order them in restaurants because it's marketed as an 'upgrade' and they feel like being fancy, but I'll take the fried russet potatoes every day over those abominations." -- Aero_Jet
Seeing Red
"Bell Peppers! If I have just a small piece I can taste it for hours afterwards. And it is put in so many things." -- Jaerynn
"They are poison. Poison everything they touch. In summer husband makes stuffed ones on the grill so I don't have to suffer. The smell of them cooking literally has made me ill to my stomach since I was a child." -- deviantelf
Do you have something to confess to George? Text "Secrets" or "" to +1 (310) 299-9390 to talk him about it.
In fact, some mistakes are so astronomical that they're remembered for decades afterwards, leaving the one who made the mistake a legacy of being a dumba**. Here are a few of them!!!
U/ronjans24 asked: What was the biggest mistake in human history?
Some may argue that the existence of the Universe was a mistake. I disagree. It was clearly Zayn leaving One Direction. But these next few were pretty bad too.
If you do the math, this is also the reason why Hentai exists.
I'll say the wrong turn Franz Ferdinand's driver made that went right in front of Gavrilo Princip.
EDIT: yes I'm aware war may still have broken out even if Franz Ferdinand wasn't assassinated
Imagine you're Gavrilo Princip. The assassination plot you and your friends had been cooking up for about the last year or so has been a complete and total disaster, just a monumental f*ck-up of the highest degree. You're staked out at this deli thinking maybe, just maybe the car will pass by, and by some stroke of sheer luck, it does.
If you're Princip, this is nothing short of serendipity.
Petition to return to the ocean.
Ocean Surf GIFGiphy"Many were increasingly of the opinion that they'd all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that even the trees had been a bad move, and that no one should ever have left the oceans."
"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move." - Douglas Adams
This was, in fact, a monumental mistake.
Sears not beating Amazon to the punch.
Blockbuster not buying Netflix.
You thought THOSE were bad? Well gear up for their next few, because they are 100% accurate. Except the one about Cats, that movie slaps.
I don’t know sports, but sure.
Seahawks not running it.
I used to wear a Seahawks jersey whenever I took a test because I knew I would pass when I shouldn't.
CATS is great, y'all are just boring.
GiphyThe Emoji Movie.
That live action movie about Cats is also up there.
Very fair point.
Social Media.
Humans are not wired to have that many social interactions and maintain that many relationships. Plus the echochambers it allows people to create for themselves, no matter how conspiratorial or vile their beliefs, means that stupid/evil people are no longer shunned into changing their mind.
Not sure it was worth being able to see what a celebrity had for lunch or what new "dance" your younger cousin and her tween friends are doing.
But in all seriousness, some horrible things may now have happened if the right thing was halted at the right time.
Washington called it.
George Washington Disney GIF by Hamilton: An American MusicalGiphyVoting for people based on what side of the political spectrum they're on. George Washington himself advised against political parties because he thought they would cause too much division in this country. Unfortunately for everyone, he was right.
Big oops on that one.
Barack Obama mocking Donald Trump at the Correspondents Dinner might have led directly to his 2016 run....
"Now, I know that he's taken some flak lately, but no one is happier, no one is prouder to put this birth certificate matter to rest than The Donald," Obama said. "And that's because he can finally get back to focusing on the issues that matter — like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened in Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac?"
Then he turned serious: "But all kidding aside, obviously, we all know about your credentials and breadth of experience. For example — no, seriously, just recently, in an episode of 'Celebrity Apprentice' — at the steakhouse, the men's cooking team did not impress the judges from Omaha Steaks. And there was a lot of blame to go around. But you, Mr. Trump, recognized that the real problem was a lack of leadership. And so ultimately, you didn't blame Lil Jon or Meatloaf. You fired Gary Busey. And these are the kind of decisions that would keep me up at night. Well handled, sir. Well handled."
This is the best Star Wars and no one can change my mind.
I'll take 'Star Wars Christmas Special' for $100.
That atrocious pile of manure gave us Boba Fett, so without the Christmas Special there won't be The Mandalorian.
Wow, in this article, I openly admitted my love for Cats AND The Star Wars Holiday Special. So maybe my existence was the biggest mistake of all.
ANYWAY, I hope you enjoyed, and I hope you all feel a little bit better about yourself. Because when push comes to shove, at least you didn't accidentally start World War I