Police Officers Share Their Strangest Experiences With The Paranormal

Security guards and first responders keep watch over people or property.
Working alone in dead silence and in dark places or responding to emergencies can play mind tricks, but these professionals are trained to remain focused.
Curious to hear from people who work in protective professions, Redditor L3n777 asked:
"Police, security guards, paramedics etc - Have you ever been called out only to realise it was a seemingly paranormal incident? What happened?"

Something spectral or something from another galaxy?
You decide.
The Darting Light
"Marine stationed in Japan back in 2010-12."
"I was military police. One night around 2-3 am we hear over the radio 'uhhhh. Any units seeing the light over the water south?' It was a marine air station based on the southern tip of Japan. We had no flights coming in or going out that night. Everyone knew there shouldn't be a light flying over the waters."
"So about 3 patrol cars met up at the air field where there was a way better view. Sure as sh*t there's a light sitting out over the water blinking slowly off and on. Some guys tried to say it was a star, so we had traffic control cameras from dispatch zoom in on it."
"Turns out it was slowly moving out of the cameras. So while by ehe we couldn't tell it was moving, the cameras picked it up. We sat there kind of amazed for an hour before it went away."
"As we were getting back into the squad car I took a last look at the night sky and saw a small light dart behind some clouds in a movement that didn't make sense. I didn't tel the other guys, just thought there's no way they would believe me."
"Months later I was running on the sea wall and stopped to lay down and catch my breath. Again saw a light, watched it drive into some clouds and then disappear. That was around the time of the tsunami and Fukushima. Super weird."
– Majestic-Science-220
Extra-terror-estrial
"Not a responder, but lived next door to one who is very famous in our hometown for his alien abduction, but there are other stories, too. This all went down in the 80s, rural England, and my memory of the exact details are fuzzy (been a while since anyone has bothered discussing it, small hometown and everyone knows and is over it)."
"The alien abduction story is that he was on the way back from a call out, saw some odd lights on the road ahead and had to stop, a one track road. He went to investigate the lights as any good police officer does, and next thing he knows it's a half hour later and he's back in his car seat, car facing the other way, some odd substance on him, no lights to be seen."
"The police dispatch also confirm that his radio frequency just disappeared for that half hour. The substance was tested and didn't match any known profile (I really have no idea what that really means or what tests were)."
"At around the same time, this officer and some others were called out by a farmer whose cows had disappeared. Yes, very stereotypical cows in a tractor beam story. But the farmer reported them missing, multiple police show up, gate is locked and no cows."
"They all decide to drive around looking for the cows. The paranormal magnet officer reports that thing where you keep trying to drive somewhere but always end up back where you were when it shouldn't be possible on his route, but they all convene back at the field at the end of shift."
"The cows are back, though none of the officers found them and nobody called in to find them. And remember, paranormal officer has seemingly been driving past the field on a loop all night. The farmer was also unaware when they called to ask him. Totally sounds like the farmer pulled a prank, except it was raining that night and there was loads of wet mud building at the edge of the field where the gate is, and not footprints or hoof prints, and the cows were dry, too."
"The last story I have the vaguest recollection of, I think it happened some years earlier and the paranormal officer was called to the discovery site. It is mostly about a different guy, a farmhand who was an immigrant who disappeared without a trace and then appeared several days later and miles away, dead, with burns and another unidentifiable substance all over his body, dumped at the top of a pile of coal."
"Again, no sign of anyone climbing up the very precarious pile of coal. And no sightings of this farmhand getting from the farm to a different town - one road, and he didn't seem to be on it at any point. He was in the same clothes but appeared to have undressed then been redressed by someone else."
"Autopsy couldn't find a cause of death, it wasn't the burns, and he was like, barely dead (no rigor mortis) when discovered. Edit: Should probably add that the official answer to the farmhand death was spontaneous ball lightning, itself a weird theory, and it doesn't explain most of the situation."
"I am not saying aliens but everyone at home is mildly convinced of the aliens."
– bingley777
It all starts with a sound.
After Hours Visitor
"Universal Orlando has a ride that you can hear a little girl laughing and someone running up and down the corridors after the ride closes."
"I've had doors that only lock with a key somehow lock when no one was around. The mechanics only work with ALL the lights on and music blasting."
– Revolutionary-Yak-47
These Low Effort Jobs Have Surprisingly High Salaries | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Have you ever worked one of those jobs that paid you to kinda sit there? If you have, you know the joy that comes with watching the entirety of Breaking Bad ...Undetected Visitor
"Unarmed security for a residential building here, this is extremely tame compared to some of the other stories here but this is a pretty salient subject (and I have evidence)."
"My site has a rooftop pool and it's really one of the only major things the management gets anal about when it's supposed to be closed. On a chilly night not too long ago I was posted up in the rooftop stairwell staying warm when I hear a crescendo-ing fit of laughter that goes to the point where the laugher is gasping and choking."
"Kind of weird, but not a big deal considering that people throw parties and whatnot all the time and I could tell it wasn't close enough to be someone horsing around in the pool. Then I just start hearing a bunch of shrieking, and the source of the noise is moving around."
"At this point I step out, and I realize it's coming from the rooftop itself (locked up and only accessible by non-security by scaling a concrete wall). The noise stops and I try to start zeroing from where exactly on this dark, slippery, cold-ass roof the noises were coming from."
"Then I see some footprints on the roof that were not there before. Barefoot prints with no heel print (tiptoeing). Footprints that are dirtier than the surface of the roof itself. Noped my way right back inside because it was an hour before clock-out"
"I'd much rather have something paranormal than a methhead on the roof running around with no shoes."
– Insominus
Electrical Disturbance
"Before my actual job in LE, worked security in a college back in 2016. I remember at some point a movement detection alarm tripped in the theatre. I check up on the cameras and only the lobby had a camera. The lights were flickering but it seemed 'intelligent' meaning one light was flickering then suddenly another one was. I decided to go check it out. All doors were locked magnetically. Lights stopped flickering the second I walked into the room."
– StunningZucchinis
Cry For Help
"Temporariy security guard at a supermarket in Holland. Suddenly i get a call that there is a kid locked in one of our Walk in coolers that you need a magnetic key for to unlock. Customers and staff have heard this kid yell for help."
"I get my magnetic master key and open the door. there is nothing in the cooler no kid no produce nada. We explain it away as some joke but staff insist they heard it. Jokingly tell them they heard a ghost or some sh*t. And after that i continue my shift slightly unnerved."
– sarper97
These Redditors had no clue who or what was moving things around.
Ghost Driver
"Yyyooooooo lol you might not believe me but at universal studios Hollywood the lower lot we use golf carts or Ford explorers to patrol. There is a golf cart that drives it self at night."
"We have the number of the cart on camara and I sh*t you not it's been 'no operational' for over 6 years. (Some one wrecked it on lot) thing drives around jaw lake and residential area at night. Scary sh*t is I patrol up there alot for my swing shift never seen it but camaras catch it zooming past use when we are driving lol"
– Fearsnodeath
Maybe The Building's Old
"I know the feeling, especially with the doors. the building I work in has these sliding doors. The outer doors locks at 8pm but the inner doors stay unlocked. Sometimes around 1 am or 2 am the inner door will open like someone just walked past it... Once the locked outer door slid open like someone walked up to it... "
"That night I cut power to the doors for the rest of the shift. Same with the phone, except we can see who is calling in, whether it is an outside line or if it is coming from in the building. At least once a week there will be a call from one of the offices in the middle of the night, the first night it happened I assumed it was housekeeping, next morning I spoke to head of housekeeping and was told all housekeeping leaves at 8pm, same with kitchen staff, and maintenance."
"Management is out the door by 5pm, only staff in the building after 8pm is myself and a handful of nurses, and it can't be any of them as they are on another floor, I have the only key to the offices the call comes from, and I would see if anyone entered or exited the offices. Same with the alarms, had the fire alarm go off last week and it prompted all the fire doors to close, as soon as those doors closed it stopped."
"I checked, nothing in the building to trigger it, opened the fire doors back up, sat down at the desk, 5 minutes later alarm is shutting the doors again for no reason."
"So only thing I can figure at this point is this building I work in is an old building and it probably has some bad wiring somewhere that keeps setting things off."
– CylonsInAPolicebox
Ghost Writer
"A guy I worked with told me about a computer programming job he had at a small bank that I think was in Salem, Oregon. He was engrossed working on some code and didn't notice people leaving for the day, but at some point he realized he was alone."
"But he could hear slow, irregular typing, like somebody who didn't know how to type was using one finger. He was in a groove and kept working, but eventually he had to stop and figure out what it was."
"After walking around and finding nobody there he realized the sound was coming from behind a door he had never seen opened. As he opened the door the typing sound stopped, and what he found was a small closet with some boxes of forms and stuff stacked up, and on top of the boxes was an old manual typewriter, like from the 1920s. No paper in it."
"At that point he just closed the door and called it a night. This guy was a rather unimaginative person and also a hardcore biblical Christian. He never even reported this or asked his coworkers about it. I would have stuck a sheet of paper in the typewriter (and then noped out for the night)."
– refried_pancakes
Building With A Gruesome Past
"Once worked in a call center very late at night. Around 8pm you'd hear all the doors in the main corridor slamming shut, but the doors didn't open or close at all."
"Later we tried to frighten one of the workers by telling them the place was haunted, and found out about a month later that the entire building was on top of a medieval plague pit, where they just build over it and left the corpses buried."
– WimbleWimble
Haunted Condo
"I work security at night in a luxury condo, I actually started a little over a month ago and I already had a fair share of incidents."
"Alarms triggered for no apparent reason, finding unusual doors unlocked, random orbs on the cameras, doors slamming while nobody's around, elevator phone started ringing by itself."
– Important_Walrus8917
I always imagine security guards wander dark corridors at night illuminated only by their flashlights to investigate strange sounds.
If that is a reality, to them I tip my hat.
Because regardless of earning a decent wage, I would never want to subject myself to witnessing horror movie tropes like fresh footprints when no one else is in the building, or a strange point of light darting around that is not traced back to my flashlight, or slamming doors not due to mechanical failure.
To all responders in the field, thank you for your service.
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What do you believe?
Is there a GOD in the sky?
Is he guiding us and helping us?
Life is really hard. Why is that is a big entity is up there loving us?
Atheists have taken a lot of heat for what feels like shunning GOD.
What if they've been right all along?
Maybe let's take a listen and see what they really think.
Redditor __Jacob______ wanted to hear from the people who don't really believe all that "God" stuff. They asked:
"Atheists, what do you believe in?"
I'm waffling between G-O-D and nothing. So please give me some education.
911
"We need to look out for each other because help isn't coming."
cknipe
Peace Out
"More than 2 decades ago, a priest was giving a sermon in my church and he said 'our faith requires you to believe without question. Why call it faith if you have to ask questions?' I haven't returned to church. Not until my wedding day but you know what I mean."
asiangontear
Delusion
"When I was young I used to think that after death you would have access to a PC that you could see absolutely anything about your life. Stats, any question you had no matter how obscure, replays of moments, perspectives of others in relation to you. No matter what you wanted to know, if it was relatable to you, you could see it. I know it's silly, but as time goes on I just want it to be real, and I don't think I'd have any issue allowing myself to fall into that delusion."
eggwardpenisglands
I think nothing happens...
"Realistically, I think nothing happens. We literally experience nothing after death. Same thing that we experience before birth. We don't exist, so it's nothing. I think the tenant that we should follow while living is to try to be happy and healthy while minimizing the damage we do to each other."
"What I would LIKE to happen after death is whatever you believe in, exists. I think Christians should get to go to heaven if they truly believe in it, Hindus and Buddhists get reincarnated, and everyone else also gets to experience what they believe they will experience."
"'I would still experience Nothing. Maybe it's one of those things where at the moment of death their brain makes them experience what feels like an infinitely long moment in time where they experience their afterlife. I just think it would be neat for everybody."
Better_Meat_
Shrug
"Best advice I received from a dear senior on their way out. 'You win some, you lose some' shrug. Nothing divine, life is that simple and wonderful, accept it and move on."
Tune_Kindly
It all sounds pretty simple. Why are people so up in arms about Atheists?
Whatever
"I believe in a universe that doesn't care, and people that do."
imCIK
Cool with Empty
"Nothing. [Serious]."
rumblingtummy29
"I feel this way about death. When I was 5, my grandfather died and my cousin simple said, he is dead, that means you are gone forever. Everything ends up dying, even plants and animals. I'm now in my 40's and still have this simplistic view of life and death. People think I'm ambivalent to life and death but it's just what it is."
thepigfish82
puppet-masters...
"I think a lot of religious people struggle with the fact that we are all just swirling units of chaos. There is no grand plan or great orchestrator. I think that’s why people who are prone to religion are also susceptible to things like Q anon and the Cabal and all that. They REALLY want to believe that there is some almighty puppet-master who determines all of humanity’s fate."
Lngtmelrker
“we’re living in a society!”
"Just be a kind and empathetic person not because you’re worried about some cosmic justice, but because it’s the right thing to do. If there is some being that created us there’s no way they actually care about believing in it or adhering to some rules from over 2000 years ago."
"Also a big thing for me is that I find the idea that you need religion or the Bible in order to have morals and ethics pretty dumb. It’s pretty f**king clear that most evangelicals have neither. But my main thing is being a good person simply because, as George Costanza once said we’re living in a society!' If you’re only a good person in order to make it to heaven you probably aren’t actually a good and moral person."
conservative_genius
That's All
"You're born. You live. You die. That's it. After you die you cease to exist, the same as before you were born."
serefina
Believe what you want. We're all here together. So let's focus there.
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The list of what irritates me is endless.
I mean... breathing too loud or dust can set me off.
I'm a bit unstable, yes.
But I'm not alone.
So let's discuss.
Redditor Aburntbagel6 wanted to hear about all the times many of us just couldn't control our disdain. They asked:
"What never fails to piss you off?"
I feel like this article can go on forever. Let's get some highlights.
Wasted Time
"Meetings that could and should have been an email."
Sirena609
Lotto People
"Getting stuck behind people playing the lottery at a corner store."
thenuggetlover
"I also used to work in a gas station and you’re SO right. I f**king hated the lottery people. Especially since my store had a small staff and there was usually only one of us working at a time, which meant that I couldn’t get any of my other work done as long as they were there."
"And you’re right, it’s also pretty sad to watch. I had one lady who used to come in every day and spent hundreds and HUNDREDS of dollars on scratch tickets. One day, she won $200 after spending probably around $600 and she was so excited and saying she can 'finally pay her bills.'"
i-am-your-god-now
Aware...
"No situational awareness. Job, home, shopping, driving. Think for one minute and go about. OBSERVE!!"
Dizzy-Foundation8122
"My mom is one of those people who leave the shopping cart in the middle of the damn aisle and proceed to walk twenty feet away. After correcting her a million times to no effect I just walk away now so people don’t know I’m with her."
OutrageousEvent
Shut Up!
"Endless barking in the middle of the night, I love animals but that sh*t I can't stand."
Acceptable-Lemon2924
"Endless barking in general drives me up a wall. One of my friends dogs was barking almost an entire gaming session the other day. I wanted to reach through the computer and smack him for letting it go on."
bangersnmash13
Kindness
"People being mean to service workers, especially if the workers are very young."'
scaryboilednoodles
All of these things. I hate them all.
Admit It
"People who never accept fault when they mess something up. Like, why blame a million people when it was clearly you who did it???"
Quirky-Area-8978
From Above
"My upstairs neighbors."
lutzow89
"I had terrible neighbors at my previous apartment. It was a one person studio for students, but her boyfriend was clearly living with her illegally and he was loud."
"One night we knocked n the door at 3 AM because of the loud music and an unknown girl opened the door. I just thought they were having a little party. But the next door I saw the girl living there come home with a suitcase after having been away for the weekend... Her BF was cheating on her in her own apartment."
Th3_Accountant
Move Away
"People who sit directly next to me at the airport, movie theater, any other place where you can choose a seat when there is PLENTY of other seating."
BacardiPardy33
"I can’t YES this enough and the ones who can’t park for crap so they park so close you can’t open doors on one side of the car or the ones who park directly behind when you pulled through so the door won’t open to load groceries."
BacardiPardy33
It's Over
"People who try to restart old drama. Like I'm done with you, just leave me alone."
Tired_Potatos
"Yep, half the reason I've basically quit playing one of my favorite online video games. People keep bringing old crap up or sh*tting on on someone who used to be our friend. I got tired of it so I just ejected the game out of me."
CaucasianHumus
AHHHHH!!!
"People walking too slow in front of me with no way to get around them. It’s even worse if it’s a couple or group taking up the whole sidewalk. HAVE SOME SPATIAL AWARENESS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!"
_-v0x-_
Life in general pisses me off. I'm easy.
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If you, like millions of others, had your little 90s heart held in an unyielding vice grip by Jonathan Taylor Thomas, I'm gonna need you to sit down and take a few deep breaths because I'm about to say something so controversial, yet so freeing for you.
Jonathan Taylor Thomas was not all that and your passionate love for him was classic Disney manipulation. It's not your fault.
You weren't in 90s love - you were traumatized, and it's gonna be okay.
Reddit user Endowedx7 asked:
"90s babies.. who was your first television crush?!"
First of all, nobody followed directions and we jumped from TV to movies to cartoons super fast.
Secondly, the sheer number of people who say Jonathan Taylor Thomas when this question is asked just hurts my soul. He, honestly, was a B-rate heartthrob at best.
His hair wasn't perfectly parted and platinum-like Jonathan Brandis (RIP)
Thomas Ian Nicholas had stronger "3 first names" power.
JTT lacked the shy smile Devon Sawa served with ease.
Even Andrew Keegan started a cult.
What did Jonathan Taylor Thomas do to earn so much adoration?
I theorize that the answer, quite simply, boils down to trauma bonding. We fell in love with Simba, and his little cries over Mufasa, and that was it; JTT was now our forever favorite because of the Circle of Life.
Dang Disney is good - but also kind of evil. Now that you know, you can heal. Go forth in peace.
Bask in Reddits favorite Non-JTT 90's crushes.
Devon. Duh.
"Casper, Devon Sawa"
- ramblinator
"Hard yes at Devon. Casper 'Can I keep you?' wrecked me 😭"
"Also in Now and Then, Idle Hands, Final Destination. They were my faces. Oof, the 90s were a time."
- coma-toaste
"My sister actually just met him at some sort of convention in Dallas. She sent me a pic, because she knew how much I loved Devon."
- ShataraBankhead
"Devon Sawa was my first crush. My friends could keep JTT, I only had eyes for Devon."
- bassgirl_07
"This was the answer I was looking for. He looked beautiful to me at a kid watching that movie."
- Noppo_and_Gonta
A Science Lady
"Scully. I love me a science lady."
- silverblaze92
"Lort yes Scully with that fire red hair and those soft eyes!!!!"
"Underrated crush. She was beautiful!"
- Drops_USMiC
"I still have the biggest crush on her. Literal schoolgirl crush, blush and all."
"It took me like 10 years to realize that straight girls don't like other girls the way I adored Scully."
"Aaaaaand that's how I realized I was definitely bi."
- juniper-mint
"Scully and Velma were my biggest fictional crushes growing up, I just like nerdy ladies. 🤷🏻♂️
- Foofsies
Daddy Shang
"Captain-turned-General Li Shang from Mulan."
"The first time he took his shirt off made a lasting impact that I was not prepared for."
- g_lay
"Lol it did for Mulan, too."
"It occurred to me recently that she'd likely never seen a shirtless man who wasn't her dad, so that specimen was her first..."
- kdbartleby
"Daddy Shang"
- supholmess
"BRUUUHHHH Shang yes"
- TheObservationalist
"Sign me up for the next war!"
- ElderBrute
Brendan
"BRENDAN FRASER"
- purplehairedcatdaddy
"Came here to say this! For me it was George of the Jungle, the bowls scene changed me."
- sheehosellstheshells
"God he was sexy, especially with long hair."
"He was done so dirty. Glad he’s getting more work now but he deserves more."
- Viiibrations
"Omg, I was so in love with him. I even watched that stupid Dudley Do-Right movie."
"Everybody loved him for his body, but I'd still give it to him today though. Chubby guys ftw."
- Iced_Jade
...And Everyone's Bisexual Awakening
"I came here to say Brendan too. George of the Jungle and The Mummy… 🤤"
- Tough_Raspberry1983
"As a bisexual, The Mummy and The Mummy Returns had me feeling so many ways. Poor young me didn’t know who to focus on more lmao"
- starkrocket
"Lets be honest here, practically the entire main cast of the Mummy qualifies."
- Skylis
"The Mummy was a glorious bisexual awakening for so many people."
- shallowbasketcase
Its Morphin Time
"Kimberly, the pink ranger. She can still get it, wherever she is."
- END0WEDx
"You are the man, OP, for responding to your own question with the best answer. "
"This too was my first tv crush. She was all that back then."
- Mikernoce
"The episode where the Tigerzord and Thunder Megazord get destroyed... She had no right wearing that outfit for us kids but I'm so glad she did."
- [Reddit]
"This is the one."
"I was like 4 watching power rangers in my underwear, and I thought she could see through the TV and I got embarrassed and put pants on."
- TheOfficialTheory
Starfleet Standards
"Jonathan Frakes. That beard fetish has followed me around for the last 25 years."
- Cutegun
"Omg, yes. Daddy Riker has me feeling all kinds of ways that are surely not up to Starfleet standards."
- hardly_trying
"Ohh yeah. There’s a reason why he was always written as the one seducing (or being seduced by) hot alien women."
"And yes, I too grew up to love men with beards. 😆"
- tourmaline82
"It’s unsettling to re-watch the first season before his beard was a cast member. Deeply unsettling."
- lunaleather
Flintstones
"Halle Berry from the 1994 Flintstones movie."
"Oh. My. God. I was obsessed."
- ImLikeLicorice
"I remember thinking 'wtf is that cleavage doing in a PG Steven Spielberg movie?' But at the same time, I was perfectly ok with it."
- Ooze3d
Shakira Shakira
"I remember watching Shakira in a music video on MTV when I was 9 and being completely mesmerized 😂"
- MoAdibbb
"Yes, same for me. I was 8 and Whenever Wherever was everywhere on TV and radio."
- lucitribal
"Me too! She just did it for me and I was like 4... It's literally one of the earliest memories I still have."
- Dazius06
Merry Christmas
"Aaron Carter on the Christmas episode of Lizzie McGuire…. Lol what a time!"
- illbeokayeventually
"I met him when I worked at the airport. Came in wearing a beanie and a bathrobe."
"He was super friendly though 😅"
- evergreenxsage
"I was scrolling for this answer! I can picture the Christmas episode in my head!"
- Helpful_Cat0808
"I swore I was the only one who saw this and just never said it out loud."
- sheisvoid
The Static
"I hope video games count!"
"I remember walking up to the TV to kiss Link."
"The static made it more fun lol"
- mommasoggydoggyup
Hexes And Homos
"The Hex Girls from Scooby-Doo! and The Witch's Ghost"
- TheMissingChapstick
"Oh the Hex Girls are required crushes for every young gays development."
- [Reddit]
"Honestly I should've realized I wasn't straight sooner, those hex girls were FINE"
- Azusanga
"I'm convinced the Hex Girls singer Thorn was the reason so many guys my age were into scene girls when they were younger."
- What----------------
"The hex girls definitely awakened something inside of me when I was younger."
- abloobudoo009
Something Awesome
"April O'Neil from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"
- N_Tracer
"I just remember thinking there was something really awesome about that yellow jumpsuit"
- Crazyjaw
"My God, that Yellow jump suit."
- AdamBombTV
"If my mom would walk in the room while April was on the screen I would get so nervous and awkward like she walked in on me watching porn."
- Japhysiva
Peter
"Jeremy Sumpter in Peter Pan"
- Obvious-Olive8241
"OHHHHHH weee you just took me down nostalgia lane. That boy had me dead for a solid week straight."
"Kept rewatching Peter Pan again and again to pretend I was Wendy 🥺😭"
- a_sunny_disposition
"Same, even convinced my parents to take me to L.A. to a Ronald Mc Donald race in Griffith park to meet him, and the day of the race we got lost and didn’t get to meet him."
"I almost cried when i saw everyones picture with him on this forum called Jeremy’s angels."
- Aggravating_Row2179
Gargoyles Need Love Too
"The female gargoyle in the Gargoyles cartoon."
"My siblings made fun of me for this for like 10 years until they forgot about it. I hope they never remember lol."
- Spirit860
See?
TONS of non-JTT options for all tastes!
We can finally be free, my friends. Free!
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How did these scam calls become such a problem.
They're an epidemic.
If I get one more robocall today, I may through a phone through a window.
I've go to start scaring these people off.
Would that even work?
Redditor vmcards17 wanted to hear about how we can get creative with those non-stop phone calls that are driving us mad!
They asked:
"What’s the funniest way to answer a scammer’s call?"
My first thought is... "LEAVE ME ALONE!!"
Blood
"Don't say 'hello' just pick up the phone and say 'it's done, but there's blood everywhere. I'll need your help cleaning it up. Bring bleach, trash bags and that large saw from the garage.' and then just hang up."
FinnbarMcBride
Pretend
"Pretend to be elderly and confused. You’ll hook them immediately and can then proceed with wasting the most of their time."
Bananaman1229
"This is my go to, my record is 8min of slowing asking them to repeat it and ask about my benefits or what the package includes. If it’s the solar guys I ask about the panel type and what crew they will use. Sometime I tell them I just moved or ask about the weather."
brapo68
language by language...
"I gave the phone to my neighbor who talked to them in Pennsylvania German. My neighbor is Amish. Then the person on the phone tried to use regular German, but all they knew was 'Sprechen Sie Deutsch.' When my Amish neighbor said yeah and then rattled off in a mix of German and dutch the scammer hung up."
"Then they called back not 20 minutes later. So I spoke to them in Chinese. But they kept telling me to speak in English. They hung up after about two minutes."
elanrach
Hold Please
"In a forum online, a girl answered a call with a Caller ID that came up as fraud. She answered breathlessly, 'Can you hold on? I'm having sex.' She clicked on porn and set the phone next to the computer's speaker. The guy listened for half an hour."
SciFi_Author
HOW?!?!
"HOW DID YOU GET THIS NUMBER?!?"
"Answer every phone call that way."
RogueNine
Why did I not think of some of these sooner?
Hey Bob
"Bob's orphanage, you make 'em we take 'em."
Spicy_French-Fry
Gotcha!
"Wasting time of scammers? One of the most fun activities to do. Have wasted the time of one guy who wanted to scam me with steam cards and such.. I impersonated a local I know and talked like him, acted like him and mocked the scammer in subtle ways. Was really funny, I streamed that entire sh**show to my friends."
"Me mocking a scammer and giving them useless steam-gift codes, even telling them that they are like any other guy out there trying to scam me and such. It's really hilarious when you think about that me telling to that guy that he is like any other guy who wants to scam me made them trying even harder instead of acknowledging that he was completely played by me the entire time."
"We had five hours pure fun together, the scammer lost five hours of lifetime."
ShadowLemon313
Tricks and Treats
"I once worked for a legitimate call centre where we called people who ticked boxes, on forms and stuff, saying they'd be interested in X product or service. It was a crap job and I got out of it ASAP, but it paid by the hour (not commission). People would hang up, pretend it was the wrong number, pretend not to speak English, and all kinds of stuff (even though I'd be happy to just remove their info if they asked, and I always offered)."
"But when people pulled the whole 'Just wait a minute' trick, and left the phone down, it was a welcome break. I could just doodle pictures, browse the internet, and generally relax, because the system had me down as on a call. And I was still getting paid the same."
"I once spent an hour and a half like that, before the woman picked the phone up, realized I was sill there, asked me what the hell was wrong with me, and hung up. This may well have been a similar thing."
BadgerSituation
You Win!
"In your best Announcer's Voice:"
"You've reached KSCM 99.3 The River, you're on the air and you are the seventh caller! Are you excited? ARE YOU EXCITED???"
Hysterical_Realist
I'm trying all of these. And also... "LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!"
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