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People Reveal Which Board Games They'd Hate To Get Sucked Into Jumanji-Style

Who doesn't love a good board game? High stake risk, financial gain or ruin, life and death scenarios and if you're as competitive as me... those aren't false sentiments as a competitor. If it's you or me... it's you! Recently a reboot of the classic film "Jumanji" was released starring 'The Rock' and it devoured the box office and like the first film starring a brilliant Robin Williams... it got people wondering.

Redditor _WhiteBoobs admitted Reddit... If you were sucked into a board game like "Jumanji" which board game would you least want to be put into? **_There's a loaded thought. As long as it's not the game of 'Life,' we're already losing at that! **

I'D RATHER JUST WATCH '28 DAYS LATER' OVER AGAIN...

Pandemic!!!

DEPENDS ON THE INSURANCE....

Operation. As either the surgeon or the patient.

DEAL ME IN...

This is a card game, but I figure it counts: Gloom. The goal of the game is to make your family as miserable as possible before killing them. You literally tally up the misery of your dead family to get your score at the end.

ISN'T THAT A HORROR MOVIE?

Betrayal at house on the hill. There are so many possibilities that would be terrifying.

YOU'RE SUNK!

Battleship.

"Crank up the engines! Deploy evasive maneuvers!"

"Can't, sir. It's not our move."

EAT ME FIRST!

Any of the games that use the lore from HP Lovecraft. I could side with Vikings, and there's a chance for me to survive a zombie or disease outbreak. But when it comes to dealing with Cthulhu and friends, no matter whose side you're on, the lucky ones get devoured. The unlucky ones go insane then get devoured.

WHAT IF I'M THIRSTY?

Hungry Hungry Hippos.

AREN'T WE ALL LOSING THAT ONE ALREADY?!

Life!

BUT HOW MUCH REWARD?!

I spent my entire childhood losing at Risk to the rest of my family. One time I did try this strategy. I put as many of my initial in one place as I could, I conquered countries until I had three cards to cash, then I retreated into South America and waited... I waited the entire game, collecting armies until everyone else was out and my brother was spread thin.

Then I started my campaign. I cashed my cards and started marching my massive armies across the globe. I knew I only had one turn to do it because my brother had cards to cash and would get tons of armies his next turn. I swept across the board until I got to the last country to be conquered in Australia.

The game came down to one final dice roll. I only had two armies left and my brother had one. Whoever won the roll would win the game. I lost the roll. My brother cashed his cards and wiped me of the board. And that is the closest I ever came to winning Risk.

CLOSE THE GATES!

Arkham Horror. Good way to watch everything go to hell.

BEWARE THE TARGET?

Crossfire

They warned me I'd get caught up in it... I didn't listen.

SOUNDS LIKE THE CURRENT ADMINISTRATION...

Kingdom death monster would be awful.

Death everywhere, huge monsters and hellish disasters.

CASH MONEY BABY!

Monopoly. Because forget that crap.

LIFE ISN'T INFINITE.

Dark Souls. Yes, they have a board game. Yes, I'd probably die in minutes.

NOT ON A PLANE... NOT ON A LADDER...

Snakes & Ladders!

WHAT'S MY DENTAL PLAN?

Candy Land.

Sure it'd be great short-term, sugar and tasty candy and all that. But have you ever tried to live on candy alone? Within a day or two, you'd be sick to the stomach, candy passing straight through you faster than taco bell. Within a week your body would be shutting down, not to mention the abysmal state of your dental hygiene. Your only option for sustenance would be to resort to the denizens of Candyland. Things turn dark very quickly. At least in Jumanji you can get a burger without someone asking "Has anyone seen King Kandy recently?"

THE TERMINATOR CAN STAY FAKE!!

Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots - getting punched by a robot till it knocked my head off would suck.

I'LL BE A HORSE. THEY'RE USEFUL.

Catan. Knowing me I'd be stuck as the sheep.

BOO!!

Ghost Stories. It's semi-niche so even a lot of people who are into board games are unfamiliar with it, but it's absolutely brutal. No Fantasy Flight game can even touch it in terms of mounting hopelessness and despair.

...You know what, hell with it. Quick rule rundown. It's four players (or less, but four is most fun) versus the game. You're monks defending a beleaguered village. The village is nine randomly arranged tiles in a square. Each player occupies one "face" of the village with their card, which has room for three ghosts. Each turn starts with any ongoing effects and drawing a ghost card unless you're full of ghosts, in which case you just take damage. Ghosts are placed on their corresponding colors if possible so not necessarily in front of you. Then you can move and take an action. Move one tile, and either use the ability of the village tile you're standing on or attempt to exorcise any adjacent ghosts. So, the ghosts. Some of them have horrible abilities on top of being hard to kill and taking up space. Some of them lock special abilities. Sone of them steal dice used to exorcise. Some do even worse things. Some of them haunt village tiles. If three village tiles get haunted, players lose. If all players run out of health, players lose. If the deck of ghosts runs out without meeting the win condition, players lose. There is one win condition - ten cards from the bottom of the deck a special ghost from a separate deck is slipped in. This is the incarnation of Wu Feng. The incarnations are very different and usually quite deadly. You win by defeating the incarnation before exhausting the remaining ten ghosts. Otherwise, you lose.

I've won Ghost Stories ONCE. At least if I got trapped in Arkham Horror I could f--- off to Ulthar and pet cats.

TAKE YOUR BUTT BACK TO START! NO APOLOGIES!

Can you imagine being trapped in Sorry?!

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Stupid is as stupid does. And it’s pretty obvious when some poor, misinformed, potentially ignorant soul needs to be put in their place. Luckily, there are a lot of witty ways to do just that. We love a good euphemism.

Wanna know the best way to call out stupidity when you see it? Stay tuned.

U/lientubay asked: What's the best euphemism for telling people that they're stupid?

​Get a load of these sick burns. I swear, the people of Reddit are harsh.

Call outs are a universal language.

In Russian we have "intelligent thoughts have always followed him, but he was faster".

Humphr1es

We have something similar in German: "Intelligence is chasing you, but you are faster."

Tatsukishi

Be your own Easter Bunny.​

Looney Tunes Cartoon GIF Giphy

You could hide your own Easter eggs.

Bdiz78

The great Harvey Korman had some Alzheimer's @ 2005, and he still went on a talk show. They asked him how he was doing and he said he was OK. "Now I can hide my own Easter eggs." RIP.

Gas-Blaster

That’s cold.​

“At this point, you can only impress me."

Roman_Suicide_Note

This reminds me of something I saw in a show recently. One character said "Would you think less of me if ____." The other character said "I could never think less of you."

Catty_wampus

​I lol’d.

I think I saw this one here previously "You aren't the biggest idiot in the world but you better hope they don't die".

Soalindie

Once told this to my brother, his immediate response was "hey, please don't die".

Srakrn

It takes a very intelligent person to properly call out a dumb person. Weird how that works, huh?​

When the bears are smarter than the tourists.​

GIF by Smokey Bear Giphy

Now I know what Douglas Adams was talking about.

"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools."

BerenTheBold

As the park rangers in Yellowstone say- making a bear-proof trash can is very difficult due to the considerable overlap between the smartest bears and the dumbest tourists.

Lahmmom

​That’s a gross mental image.

In Greece we say "when it was raining brains, you had an umbrella".

GSavvage

In German we ask God for help. "God, let there be raining brains" this sounds so weird but idk how to express it better lol.

Edit: In German it's "Gott, lass Hirn regnen".

Foxpawdot

It’s probably a bad sign when your lawyer calls you dumb.

Lawyer to client who shared detailed attorney-client privileged strategy memorandum with a whole bunch of people, including an adverse party:

Client: "Is there anything you can do to fix this?"

Attorney: "No, you've pretty much waived the privilege and now they know everything."

Client: "Is there anyway to put a positive spin on this?"

Attorney: "Well, I suppose the judge might buy that this proves that you lack the mental capacity to form specific intent."

Malibulobo

These next ones are just plain cold, but probably very much deserved.​

Meanness from a Canadian is probably well-earned.

eric cartman GIF by South Park Giphy

On a Canadian jobsite

Ahh Terry, having you around is like losing three good men.

StrykerSeven

Oof, that’s harsh.

He's so far behind he thinks he's first.

Perstn

I had a keychain as a kid that said, "She who laughs last thinks slowest.”

KatieSedai

Those are some gross socks.

Once heard someone say "Well he's about as sharp as a sock full of soup".

Angrypunishment

"Sharp as a marshmallow" was one that went around my friend circle.

Rubywolf27

In the words of the great prophets Smash Mouth, “I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed”. That self-burn is perhaps one of the most classic euphemisms. And I just almost misspelled “euphemism”. So I can definitely relate to that lyric.

A good way to exercise your brain? Keep thinking of creative ways to insult people. Trust me, it works like a charm

Image by 1388843 from Pixabay

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