Sometimes it feels like adult humans completely forget how to act their age. When you see toddlers with better manners than the forty-year-old lawyer, you know humanity is a mess. Now granted, sometimes people are in situations where their emotions take their common sense hostage, but more and more it feels like society is just starting to live in that stasis.
For example, if your order is wrong, don't throw a tantrum or food, simply send it back. If someone cuts you off in line or on the highway, don't chase them down and scream racial slurs, send them peace for their own lives. The list goes on. Let's go through a little of it.
Redditor u/doyoushrubclick wanted some adults out there to listen up and realize... people are watching, they asked... What is the most immature thing you have ever seen an adult do?
Hello Karen...
Karen GIF by moodmanGiphyA customer literally hung out in the middle of our store and started screaming "DOES ANYONE WORK HERE?!" when the only employee in her current line of sight asked her to wait till she finished with another customer first.
It's Wrong!
My husband got a sandwich thrown at him by a middle-aged woman because he apparently "made it wrong" according to her arbitrary standards that she failed to disclose before ordering the sandwich. We later saw the same woman on a viral video yelling at the cashier in a Starbucks because some customers in the Starbucks were speaking Korean.
My husband also got the police called on him by a 30-something man for not giving him a free pickle.
Poor Woman...
My manager had two dudes blow an airhorn in her ear after she leaned out the window to hear them better. Almost blew her ear drum. Same manager also had to report a dead body on shift, call an ambulance for a suspected drug user, had a sandwich thrown at her many times and was generally abused by customers and other managers.
Customer Dearest
Mommie Dearest Quote GIF by Top 100 Movie Quotes of All TimeGiphyI saw a grown man throw his burger at the cashier at McDonald's because it had onions on it and he didn't like/want onions.
So Ignorant
I had a customer recently complain to me that they were, and I quote: "Absolutely sick and tired of all these companies using COVID as an excuse. They need to pull up their boot straps and get their sh!t together and get to freaking work."
I want to say I was baffled by their ignorance, but it's par for the course right now and the handicap on the game keeps getting higher.
Veggie issues
Having my vegetables weighed at the supermarket, and some guy cuts in line and just plonks a zucchini on the scales to be weighed (I'm in China and line cutting is a huge issue here). I don't say anything. I simply pick up the zucchini and hand it back to him. He throws it on the floor and storms off.
Forget that guy!!
Exactly at 4...
Probably not the MOST immature thing I've seen but it's what came to mind. I worked in a hot dog joint that was actually pretty popular but it closed at 4 o clock every day on the dot. Exactly at 4. We would prep for closing 30 mins in advance, keep enough food out to sell if someone came in before closing and then spend 5 mins after 4 finishing up and then leave for the day.
Well, one day my manager (great gal) and I were the only ones there.
No customers, so we get all our work done and some more and then close the signs. Manager is counting the drawer when this dude barges in. I recognized him because he had been parking RIGHT in front of the store for a solid twenty mins and I assumed he was just waiting on someone.
Dude comes in (front door is only exit so we didn't lock it but the multiple closed signs were up) and looks around. My manager says, "Sir we are closed. You'll have to go elsewhere."
This grown a** man then POUTS, proceeds to STOMP HIS FOOT and say, "But I'm Hungry and I want to eat here!"
"Sorry, sir, but our food is up and the drawer is closed. No more sales." The way she spoke to him was fitting; like he was a toddler.
Then this dude just sighs real loud and says "Fiiiiinnnnneee I guess I'll starve."
Grown man. Like not exactly a boomer but older than my dad for sure. Old enough to not act like that. Some adults are entitled AF.
You Suck!
I Hate You Lol GIF by LifetimeGiphyIn whole foods. Whole foods worker drops and spills a tray of produces he's transporting.
Middle aged lady stops, looks me in the eyes and says (loudly so everyone can hear) "SUCKS TO BE HIM". Like we were all supposed to laugh at this guy trying to do his job. Forget that foolish lady.
The Cancer Card
So... my daughter is a cancer survivor. As we've been on this journey I've discovered parents of children with cancer fall into 3 broad categories.
- Parents who are in it for themselves.
- Parents who are in it for their kids.
- Parents who are in it for the community.
I should point out that last group makes up 98% of the people, but holy sh!t do those 2% split between groups 1 and 2 are literally a cancer.
I've seen parents finagle multiple make a wish trips for their kid.
Pull the cancer card to get free everything.. then bad mouth charities when the charity realizes they're grifters just using their kid for benefits.. your kid doesn't need 4 ipads..
Getting invited to meet professional athletes and then begging for autographs and souvenirs.
I've watched parents have a melt down because their kid wasn't on the front page of a flyer promoting an event.
Piss and moan because their kid got more time on TV then they did.
It's eye opening when you see how petty and exploitive people can be.
I WIN!!
donald trump snl GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphyAdults arguing with children and then get even more mad when the child has a valid point.
"The director..."
The director of the company.
Someone asked him a work-related question. Because of this "distraction", he messed up the repair project, blamed guy asking question, and threw a wrench across the room. At someone else's head. For "distracting him."
"If you can dodge a wrench, you can work here. If you can dodge the blame for things you didn't do, then you can work here (until you get hit by a wrench or 3 write-ups, whichever comes first)."
"Shouted at an employee..."
Shouted at an employee to the point of making her cry because the employee ACCEPTED to refund the product...
"Had a temper tantrum..."
Had a temper tantrum because I was sitting in "her" seat on the bus.
"I'm in a wheelchair..."
I'm in a wheelchair and have been for all of my life. One old lady told me and I quote, "Don't worry, you'll learn to walk one day." My dad and I were baffled and didn't know what to say.
"Scream at her grandkids..."
Scream at her grandkids at the park because she wasn't paying attention and a basketball hit her.
"He refused to admit..."
He refused to admit that people liked some other guy better and didn't even show up to the party when the guy got promoted.
"I see adults pay thousands of dollars..."
I work in probate law. I see adults pay thousands of dollars to fight their siblings over trash. These items are not even of sentimental value, it's just to win some decades-old beef with a sibling.
"Ironically..."
Fast food worker here.
A couple of years ago we hired a 14-year-old girl to take drive-thru orders and run them out to cars. A few weeks into training she ended up making a few mistakes on an order in the middle of a rush. No big deal and an easy fix but my boss, a 40+-year-old grown adult, decided to yell at her in front of everyone and throw some plastic food trays at her.
She ran to the back of the restaurant crying and all of our kitchen staff stepped off the line mid-rush to comfort her and offer to be her job reference if she decided to walk out that night, which she did.
Ironically, my boss's fit ended up causing a major backlog of orders that night and we were all giving him hell the entire night for treating her that way. It was one of the few moments that I felt really proud of my kitchen crew for refusing to tolerate that s***.
"My uncle got irate..."
Was at a restaurant with my uncle and cousins from far away. First time visiting with them in years. At the end of the dinner, one of my cousins snuck off and paid for everyone as a nice gesture.
My uncle got irate yelling and complained that he wanted to pay his share because, and I s*** you not, he has a movie ticket points Visa card and he was close to getting a free movie. He argued and told off our cousin loudly in the restaurant over a few free movie points. He would not drop it until he got our cousin to apologise to him for costing him movie points.
I don't think those cousins are going to fly down again any time soon.
"Eventually..."
When I worked in the bakery at Whole Foods, we had a customer who kept asking us to make banana muffins with A LOT of pecans on top for her - but only a few at a time, like two or three. In general it was a request we could accommodate, but we had a few considerations we had to account for, like the fact that if we made them and she didn't pick them up we couldn't sell them to anyone else because pecans weren't on the ingredient list.
The problems started arising when she would call us while she was on the way to the store, expecting to pick them up when she arrived. She was about twenty minutes away and they took 45 minutes to bake. Even if she had called us while she was an hour away, we were on a pretty tight production schedule and someone would have to interrupt the work they had to get done that day for an unexpected special order for this one customer.
First, she got mad that we couldn't magically make them in twenty minutes because of chemistry. I was, unfortunately, the supervisor on shift when she called most of the time, so she'd keep me on the phone for fifteen minutes raging about how the customer is always right - even though she was factually incorrect in this circumstance. She started saying we should just make them her way all the time so that we always had them on hand for her. I explained to her that we could get heavily fined by food inspectors if we did that, but that only made her angrier because f*** the man, I guess?
Eventually, my team leader said that we had to put our foot down with her and tell her that she had to put in special orders two days in advance just like everyone else. When we told her this, she of course got like sputtering infuriated (along the lines of "How am I supposed to know when I'm going to want them?!?!"). We were able to just say "well management says so, sorry," and we thought that was that. She went along with it for a couple days, sending her poor mother to pick them up for her because she was too angry to step foot in the store - her mom always looked so apologetic.
Finally, though, she came in personally to berate my team about how rude and inconsiderate and generally s***** we had been to her. Then she asked to speak to our store manager, who had been made aware of the whole Banana Nut saga. He escorted her outside and told her she was banned from the store. We found out later that she had also been banned from the three nearest Whole Foods locations over this exact same set of circumstances.
"On the morning of my son's 1st birthday party..."
My mother-in-law doesn't handle stress very well, she tends to start lashing out at people and starting fights for no reason.
On the morning of my son's 1st birthday party, she started to lose it as we were running around getting everything ready before the guests arrived. She first cornered my wife and started freaking out over the thermostat and some other unrelated pointless crap, then found me and started a fight over the garage door (it needed oiling and I hadn't done it because I was busy setting up the party). Volume of the voice steadily increasing.
My wife marches up to her and actually sent her to her room to calm down, and she did it! She stayed up there for an hour while my wife and I finished putting up decorations. It is a memory I will cherish forever.
"I was a kid in a mall..."
I was a kid in a mall when I was able to shop by myself and saw a lady blow a fuse at some guy behind the counter. Calling him names and what not just losing her s***. He just puts up the palm of his hand and says, "Mam, I believe you are too irrational to deal with." And then just pivots 180 degrees not facing her and ignores her. Waits for her to leave and when she does, he just proceeds to say to the next person, "May I help you?" Like nothing even happened. I learned a lot from that guy in 1.5 mins.
"After three hours..."
Old job. One day, we had a huge tech overhaul they didn't prepare anyone for. Entire machines we're used to using were just gone, sometimes replaced, sometimes not. After three hours of literally everyone asking the manager how they were supposed to do their jobs now, he walked to the middle of the room and turned in a slow circle, screaming at the top of his lungs and gesturing wildly, saying, "EVERYONE JUST DO WHAT YOU ALWAYS F****** DO."
...So I went to my workstation and waggled my fingers in the air where a keyboard had been the day before.
"Not surprisingly..."
The parking garage near my work is a frustrating place. The monthly customers have a parking pass that lifts the gate to get in and to get out. The thing is, the pass and their sensor don't work. You have to creep up to where you think the sweet spot might be, wave your pass around, reverse and try again, curse a bunch, endure people behind you honking despite them going through the same thing..... frustrating.
Not surprisingly, I witnessed a grown man throw the most excellent temper tantrum I've ever seen. The gate wouldn't go up, and he just started screaming in his car and smashing on the horn, straight out of a movie. The worst part is is that the gate always seems to go upright when you reach peak rage. So he's yellin' away, and then the gate is just like "Alright, man. I'll open. Jeez."
"When I was in high school..."
When I was in high school, my boyfriend was planning on joining me and my friends for an indie movie night at my house. Boyfriend called me up to say that he couldn't make it because he had to watch his siblings, and I overheard his dad screaming, stomping, and yelling at the top of his lungs. He kept calling me a 'stupid little wh*re' and a 'f****** waste of time'.
I should mention that I was 14. Who calls a 14-year-old girl that?!
I ended up calling the police on him twice later; once when he punched his son in the face and another when he followed my mom and brother home. He wanted to 'teach her a lesson', we found out.
I don't wish pain on anyone, but if he died in a car fire I'd probably do a little dance.
"We called the police."
When I was working at Petco, I used to see all kinds of adult temper tantrums. People needed to take care of their animals but hated how much that costs. Of course, they would take it out on the store employees. People that wanted fish were the worst. They would try to get away with spending so little on fish and never wanted to clean their tanks or buy the stuff to do that. Then they wouldn't properly introduce new fish to their tanks and would bring in samples of their water that were just terrible and be pissed when they couldn't get another fish for free to replace the one they killed.
However, the biggest adult temper tantrum was from a guy that bought Flies Off (really cheap) in an attempt to get rid of fleas (relatively expensive). He used the whole bottle and came back expecting a refund because his dog still had fleas. He was told no and things went south quick. He was yelling by the check lanes about how he deserved a refund. Screaming at the manager in front of everyone making a huge scene. He then kicked over this spinning rack holding dog collars and yelled that he was going to come back and shoot up the windows. We called the police. He never actually came back, but what a total piece of garbage over like 5-10 bucks.
"He asked a clerk to come help..."
kevin smith dancing GIF by FilmStruckGiphyI was at the pharmacy around 8 pm, waiting in line behind an older lady. The pharmacist tells her she'll have to pick up her prescription tomorrow at 10 am because this location doesn't carry this particular medication. The following ensues:
Lady: I'll wait
Pharmacist: No ma'am, we physically don't have it in this store. You have to come back tomorrow at 10 am.
Lady: Let me speak to the manager.
Pharmacist: I am the manager, I'm the pharmacist and this is my store. I'm telling you, we do not have this medication right now.
Lady: Can you just give me one pill and I'll get the rest tomorrow?
Pharmacist: Ma'am, we don't have any of the pills here.
Lady: What if I pay you for the cost of that one pill right now, and I get the rest tomorrow?
Pharmacist: Ma'am, I can't give you one pill because we have zero pills in this store. You'll be fine until tomorrow at 10 am, I promise.
The woman proceeds to go WILD. She begins throwing stuff on the shelves onto the floor, stamping on them, screaming about how she will sue this pharmacy and how she's never seen such terrible customer service in her life. She even started kicking the partition between her and the pharmacist, threatening to go back there and fill it herself. It didn't even seem like she was upset about the medication itself, it was more that she didn't get her way and didn't want to come back. He asked a clerk to come help and the whole time, she's grabbing for things and throwing them onto the floor in fury. She gets escorted out and we could still hear her yelling outside.
"Then it gets bad."
A 60ish-year-old man was getting gas and the pump allows you to pay for a car wash at the same time. He adds the car wash to his bill.
Drives around to car wash, big huge large see from space type sign "Temp Out Of Service"
Goes inside starts screaming that this mother f***** tried to steal his $7.99. The guy explains that the ticket is good for 90 days and he's sorry. Slams his fist on the counter screaming that if the car wash was out of service the pump shouldn't have offered it to him in the first place. Demands a full refund including the gas for wasting his time.
Then it gets bad.
He starts calling the guy an ISIS member and throwing things off the shelves before storming out. Calls the guy all sorts of names. I thought his head may have exploded with all of the veins showing.
This man is my father. We don't speak anymore.
"We explained..."
I worked as a bra fitter in a department store. We had an older lady, probably late '60s with her rich old husband (80's) come into the store wanting to buy bras after she had 2 weeks earlier gotten a boob job. We explained that because of swelling she should wait to buy bras and she became so enraged she literally started yelling abuse at us and pushing over entire racks of underwear. Picture a thin, somewhat wrinkled woman in rhinestones, losing her s*** and tossing around undies. It was glorious.
"One time..."
I used to work at McDonald's. One time a guy came through the drive-thru and ordered chicken nuggets. We gave him his food and he drives off. A few min later, he comes into the store and runs up to the counter ranting about how we forgot his BBQ sauce. My manager meets him at the counter, apologizes profusely and gives him some BBQ sauce packets (extra too, maybe 6-7 packets). He proceeds to throw them at her and the rest of us workers behind the counter. We all had BBQ sauce splattered on our uniforms, on the walls, equipment etc. After he ran out of ammunition, he ran out of the store and drove away like a coward.
I was 15 then and I pretty much lost my faith in humanity.
"It was my last week..."
I worked in a grocery store and a woman asked me to slice her organic bread. She flipped out when she discovered that non-organic bread was also sliced on the machine. She stomped her foot and yelled, "But that messes up the organic integrity!" It was my last week working there, so I simply told her, "Ma'am, please understand, I'm not emotionally involved in the situation." She froze and just walked away with the bread.
"I told a grown woman..."
I told a grown woman she could not pet my service dog while he was working. She got herself so worked up she started shouting, and told me that if I didn't want people to pet my dog I shouldn't bring him into the grocery store. I expect this sort of behavior from young children, and I also expect their parents to keep them under control.
"Needless to say..."
I worked the front desk at a hotel a few years ago. A guest came to check in around 10 pm and asked if he could get a room with 2 beds (he booked 1 bed). I told him we were sold out of rooms with 2 beds. Before I could offer him anything else, he took the bowl of apples we had at the desk and threw it against the wall. Then he took his OWN laptop, threw it on the ground, and started kicking it around the lobby. Security came out promptly and told him he needed to leave, which obviously prompted more screaming and kicking. Needless to say, he didn't stay at the hotel that night.
"I work in a small boutique hotel..."
Hospitality industry nightmares. I work in a small boutique hotel with no security and a couple of years ago a guest had a nervous breakdown that lasted for about two hours. Her husband left her in the city center and she somehow couldn't get back to the hotel, started blaming us. Accused us all of being racist because she's Iraqi, accused the taxi driver of wanting to assault her, got in my face to the point I thought she was going to hit me. She was screaming so loudly the other guests locked themselves in their rooms. It was the worst thing I have ever witnessed from a human being.
"When I worked at Starbucks..."
Oh good lord. When I worked at Starbucks there was a very well-dressed man who came in and ordered a latte with the following customizations: whole milk, no foam, 200 degrees. We had just run out of whole milk, which I told him and apologized for. He didn't get S***** with me or anything but was sort of weird and soft-spoken. Okay, whatever. So I handed his cup down the line for his drink to be made. 200-degree no-foam lattes are a bitch to make, but my best barista was on duty so I wasn't worried at all. She hands off his drink. He takes the lid off and looks at it.
Customer: "I said no foam."
Barista: "Oh, I'm sorry, I must not have been paying attention. Give me one moment and I'll remake it for you."
Customer: "No, it's fine."
The customer walks away in the middle of my barista explaining that it would only take a few seconds to correct his drink. Suddenly, but also very silently, he takes the lid off of his drink and pours it all over the condiment bar in a sweeping motion.
Not really a temper tantrum, but obviously the dude had some very VERY weird ways of dealing with dissatisfaction.
"When I told her this..."
I'm in retail, so I witness my fair share of adult temper tantrums, but ever since I became a manager it's 10x worse because now I'm the one that gets called up to deal with the tantrums. A few weeks ago a woman wanted to return a curling iron that had clearly been being used for years and wasn't even a brand that my store sold so she obviously had no receipt and no original packaging, meaning it wasn't eligible for a return anyway whether or not it's something she had bought at our store.
When I told her this, politely, of course, she puffed up and asked to speak to the manager. Okay, I'm a manager, but the store's general manager will be here tomorrow if you want to leave your number and I can have her give you a call. Nope, not acceptable, she wants cash for it today. Even if I somehow was able to accept the return (my system literally won't let me) it would be store credit only, never cash. I tell her this, and she flips the f*** out.
Screams at me (literally, not figuratively), tells me she's calling the cops and corporate and the Better Business Bureau AND the attorney general (wtf are they going to do about it?!), calls me a wh*re, and then she tells me karma is going to bite me and I'm going to have a stillborn baby. Which was really fun to hear considering I'm currently nine months pregnant. All because she couldn't return her used curling iron for meth money. I had no doubt in my mind she was on some sort of substance, but the significant amount of teeth missing from her mouth tipped me off that it was meth she was after, and you obviously can't pay your dealer in-store credit.
"I was an intern..."
This was back in 2010 or so.
I was an intern at an ad agency in Boston and commuting into the city every morning. I'd get off at North Station and then transfer to the orange line. That stop has a decently large entryway.
One day, the woman ahead of me as I walked down the stairs had a large folder in her hands. She was reading what looked to be a fairly technical financial or legal document, and you could tell she was really stressed out about it. Like, rubbing her temples, cursing under her breath, etc.
Anyway, we get through the turnstiles and are about to head down to the train platform and she stops and just kind of looks at her stuff...and then screams at the top of her lungs I HATE WORKING!!
Then she starts sprinting back and forth and screaming (in a crowded T station during rush hour, mind you) I HATE WORKING!!!
She does this for about 30 seconds or so before eventually tossing her file up and the papers filling the air. She then sprints back up the stairs out of the station.
The wildest part was people paused for like two seconds then went back on their way as if nothing happened.
[deleted]
The Crush
smash it with a booster! GIF by Candy CrushGiphyCry when I jokingly told them that Candy Crush has crashed and lost all their level data.
COOKIE!!!
Back when I worked at a bakery a grown woman came back in a few minutes after picking up her order and she baseball threw the whole package at the cashier I was working with, luckily she dodged though it almost knocked the bread wall over.
This bakery made giant oreo-like sandwich cookies shaped like butterflies as part of the normal menu, and where called Chocolate or Vanilla Butterflies depending on the flavor.
Around easter the bakery made cookies with rainbow pastel frosting in the shapes of flowers, bunnies, eggs, chicks and butterflies, they where called Rainbow Bunny Cookies or Rainbow Egg Cookies...you get it.
They are also either chocolate or vanilla flavored.
So the lady called in an order for 2 dozen of each flavor of Butterfly Cookies. The order was filled accordingly, however the customer didn't know she had to specify the Rainbow Butterfies and instead of asking us to exchange pr something she stempts assault and ruins 48 3inch in diameter cookie sandwiches.
How High?
A guy down the street from me growing up, built a huge fence, like 10 or 12 feet high on one side of his front lawn and not the other. He said he hated his neighbour so much he didn't want to risk ever seeing him.
"invading her privacy"
I had a woman absolutely lose her mind with me because she thought I was "invading her privacy" at the bank by looking at the screen, which had nothing on it but a screen with the teller in the upper-right corner. (It wasn't like most banks where you interact with a teller in-person--you use some kind of video-chatting service to do whatever you need to do unless you do need to meet in-person with the teller.)
In reality, I was looking at it because my mom had sent me to wait in line and cash her check while she met with another teller about her debit card and I had absolutely no idea how it worked and didn't want to seem awkward in front of the teller (social anxiety sucks ass). Didn't even look for more than 5 seconds and I could care less about what she was doing, but that didn't stop her.
I feel sorry for all the employees working at the bank that had to step in and get involved and try to get this woman to calm down. And I mean all the employees. All six of them currently working at the time (it was near closing time).
Eventually the woman stormed out and peeled out of the parking lot with her husband in tow, and we apologized to the teller my mom was speaking with, who was pretty chill about the whole situation.
D-I-V-O-R-C-E
remote control raymond GIF by TV LandGiphyMy husband and I were bickering over what to watch which led to physically (play) fighting over the remote. That bastard threw it into the next room cuz he knew I was too lazy to get up to get it.
You're 40!!
Playing against a 40+ year-old man in a WHFB tournament who got upset at some horrendous rolls and threw his own models across the store.
Useless...
Use a sharpie on a weather map to double down on a completely stupid and baseless claim that wouldn't have even gained him anything if it were true.
(Honestly, there are dozens of actions of our former White House occupant that could and should make this list.).
The Segway
I worked in a warehouse and my manager was the owner's son.
So this spoiled, rich, soft, white, country club man is being shown how to operate these new ridable order selectors we have. Basically a baby Segway with a basket for small boxes. He's standing on it and the sales rep from the company was explaining the buttons and about safety.
Obviously.
He reaches over to show my manager the buttons on the handle and my manager slapped the guys hand like he was a child. We all, including the sales rep, looked at my boss like he was outside of his mind.
Eat a hot dog...
My ex started screaming and crying when his dad wouldn't eat the hawaiian pizza (he didn't like pineapple on pizza, fair enough) that i paid for. My ex then decided to pack up the rest of the pizzas so nobody else could have any, and storm out. He didn't return that night so i had to stay in the spare bedroom at his dads, (this was a rural area and our house was like an hours drive away and we had been drinking).
He then told me when i made it home the next day he ate all the pizzas in a bush and then walked home.
Ex screamed and cried coz dad wouldn't eat pizza i'd paid for so then decided nobody was having any, stormed out and left me at his dads in the middle of nowhere and took all the pizzas with him. Dude had serious issues and i still think about the bullet i dodged to this day.
I Admit!
Nbc Gwen GIF by The VoiceGiphyThis is me. I remember I was pregnant and something on the banking website wasn't working. Over and over I kept trying and nothing. I got so pissed off I hit the laptop a couple of times with my hand. Hard enough because I broke the hard drive. Whoops. 🤦🏻♀️.
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Stepping back from the curb right before someone runs a light. Catching a mistake at work right at the last minute. These sorts of “dodged a bullet” situations happen all the time—but rarely do they end up affecting others. Redditors came together to share their unforgettable stories of the times when their narrow miss ended up screwing over someone else entirely.
1. The Switch-Up
man in black t-shirt and black shorts sitting on bedPhoto by Ramiro Pianarosa on UnsplashMy freshman year of college my best friend and I requested to live together. Well, housing messed up and put us in two separate rooms with two other roommates. We talked to one of the guys and he agreed to switch rooms with me—but there was something that none of us knew.
It turns out that my original roommate was a 300-lb tuba player who didn’t shower. I felt bad for the guy who switched with me, but there was nothing I could do about it.
2. The Leftovers
person standing in kitchen during nighttimePhoto by Khachik Simonian on UnsplashI went to a Chinese restaurant on Haight Street a few years ago. My friends and I had eyes bigger than our stomachs. We left the place with a huge bag of leftovers.
On the way home we saw a lady in a wheelchair begging for change near the freeway on-ramp. We decided quickly that she needed the food more than us. We gave her the entire bag of food. She seemed genuinely thankful for the food and thanked us profusely.
That night we ALL got incredibly sick from the food. As much as that sucked…all I could imagine was some poor old lady in a wheelchair scrambling to find a bathroom.
3. A Downhill Battle
a person riding a tube down a snow covered slopePhoto by Kostiantyn Li on UnsplashIt was about 10 years ago, My family allowed me to bring two friends with me to Tennessee to go skiing and one day we went to this place where you could rent inner tubes and slide down the side of some mountain slope. So we get to the point where you're handed a tube, I got this super shoddy tube and I just so luckily placed my hand over where it was torn so I could feel the air rushing out. I quickly traded it for another and this girl behind me got the broken tube.
Anyway, I go down the slope and get to the bottom and I look up. What I saw still haunts me. The girl with the broken tube was just stuck in the middle of the slope as some 200-pound man just slams into her knocking her about 15 feet in the air, leading to her ultimately just rolling down the slope without a tube, crying hysterically.
4. A Different Kind Of Draft Dodging
sepia photography of sitting armyPhoto by Suzy Brooks on UnsplashMy grandfather was set to be deployed in San Francisco during WWII. A buddy of his had a deployment in France. His friend had a fiancée and family in San Francisco, and begged my grandfather to trade deployments with him.
My grandfather didn't have much going on in his life and didn't really care where he got sent, so he agreed. He wound up in France, where all the action was essentially long over, and they just relaxed and enjoyed an extended vacation near Paris.
He later found out that San Francisco was simply a staging point where they sent men to prepare for the front lines, and heavy duty combat. Whoops.
5. Stick Em Up
white, red, and gray concrete buildingPhoto by Mehluli Hikwa on UnsplashI was working at a gas station, and asked one of my co-workers to cover two shifts for me while I went on a short vacation. He said yes—but he had no idea what he was getting into.
On the second day, he got robbed at knifepoint. He got a cut on his face and another on his arm. They weren't bad, but they needed stitches. He quit soon after, as he was too scared to return to work.
Oh yes, I felt very bad about it.
6. Never Forget
hanged bunkers suitsPhoto by Matt C on UnsplashThis one's not about me, but an old family friend who used to be an NYC firefighter. There was an NYC mayoral primary, and the Firefighters Union was looking for volunteers to canvas for their endorsed Democratic candidate, Alan Hevesi (who, as an aside, eventually got thrown behind bars for corruption).
My family friend decided that it'd be better to be on a street corner handing out fliers/holding signs/whatever on a beautiful September Tuesday than in his Chinatown Manhattan firehouse, so he switched shifts with another guy in the house. The date was September 11, 2001. That guy didn't make it home.
The family friend was driving in from his home in Westchester to start his canvassing shift at about 10 am when he heard the news, and immediately went to the HazMat station in Queens to get his gear. By the time he made it to the site, both towers had fallen.
7. Falling On The Sword
red shrine in body of waterPhoto by Nicki Eliza Schinow on UnsplashI was coming back from a trip to Japan with a few friends, I had bought a wooden sword from a little gift shop inside Yasukuni shrine, at the time I thought it would fit inside my luggage to take home. Turns out it didn't so I asked a friend if he could put in his suitcase, he said sure. Big mistake.
Flash forward to when we make it back to immigration at SFO, out of the 15 of us, he is the one guy who gets pulled aside for a "random" security screening. He was gone an extra hour because of that wooden sword.
8. The Train Has Left The Station
running red and white train in the subwayPhoto by Mediocre Studio on UnsplashMy friend and I got on the tube together and found that there were no seats. My friend was pregnant so standing would not have been a very good option for her. I asked a man who was sitting if he wouldn't mind giving his seat up for the pregnant woman. The man was more than happy to.
Only then did I notice that the man had no arms. When the train started moving he couldn't hold on and kept falling over.
9. Nickel-And-Dimed
McDonald Drive Thru logo street signagePhoto by a befendo on UnsplashI went through a McDonald's drive-through and was short five cents and the girl waved me through and said it was ok. I went back through the drive-through a week later and the same girl was working, so I gave her a nickel to make up for being short the week before. She had a huge smile and thanked me and went to put the nickel in that automatic change dispenser they have. That’s when disaster struck.
Somehow the front came off of the dispenser and all the change in it fell out. It was full of change. Change fell out of the drive-through window out into the street. She looked like she was about to cry. I parked my car and got out and helped her pick up what I could.
10. Left Holding The Baby
two bronze-colored ringsPhoto by Zoriana Stakhniv on UnsplashMy ex-husband and I started talking about having kids. Well at the time I was on that horrible birth control called Yaz. Remember the class action? Long story short, it made things a little difficult getting pregnant.
Fast forward to a few months later and I make a devastating discovery. I find some girl’s panties in our apartment. Moved out and started the divorce. Sure enough, he knocked up his girlfriend and ditched her when their kid was only a year old. The guy was such a loser—really dodged a big bullet with that one.
11. What Are The Chances
people riding passenger bus during daytimePhoto by Ash Gerlach on UnsplashOne holiday season I had procrastinated on purchasing my plane ticket home and the cost of the ticket went through the roof to the point where it was completely unaffordable, determined to make it there, I decided that I would simply take Greyhound.
If you've never taken Greyhound, it's a real delight. I boarded the bus and it was very crowded and there were only a few seats available, most of them next to some pretty surly-looking young men. I approached the first one, "Excuse me, is this seat taken?" "Yeah" the guy nodded. Okay, on to the next. "Excuse me, is this seat taken?" "Yeah" the seconded guy replied as he laughed and look at his friend sitting in the seat in front of him. Okay, now I get it, fair enough. I go to the third guy. Uh, hey look man, this bus is sold out so either I'm sitting here or someone else will be so take your pick.
The third guy moves his backpack off the empty seat and I sit down. That’s when it happens. No sooner do I sit down, but another man boards the bus. He appears to have soiled himself, and then bathed in motor oil and brushed his teeth with a tin of sardines. He walks right up to the first guy and collapses in the seat next to him.
Next up is a woman. She's wearing a muumuu, sweating profusely, and is carrying two armloads of various cheese and meat snacks for the trip. She squeezes into her seat and plasters the second guy up against the window as he tries in vain to avoid having to touch her.
At this point, I stand up to remove my coat and say, "Hey guys, great choices!" giving them both the thumbs up!
12. Say Cheese!
man in black t-shirt and blue denim jeans playing guitarPhoto by Marissa Lewis on UnsplashI was working at a photography studio and traded appointments with another photographer. He ended up with two screaming 3- and 4-year-old girls who cried for an hour while their mother and grandmother tried to force them to cooperate. It was 8 AM.
13. What A Thrill Ride
blue roller coasterPhoto by Chris de Tempe on UnsplashMe, my husband and a couple friends went to an amusement park a few years back. We were waiting in line for a roller coaster, and there was enough room at the end of one of the rides for my husband and I to get on, but not our friends too. So we let the couple in line behind all of us go ahead, so we could all go together on the next one.
We waited a REALLY long time for the next ride...then the attendant told us there was a problem and the ride would be shut down for a while. We left the line to go elsewhere, and saw waaaaaaay up at the top of one of the big hills, the coaster was stuck.
I felt bad for getting that couple stuck on what should have been our ride, but I was glad it wasn't us. They ended up having to walk down the tracks to get off, and I kind of have this…THING about heights.
14. Better Luck Next Time
green red and blue round light decorPhoto by Shinnosuke Ando on UnsplashI paid £150 for Olympic Opening Ceremony tickets, but because these were returned tickets mine was separated from the others in my party, so I was sat by myself. My seat wasn’t bad, at one end of the stadium, slightly at an angle. Lady next to me asks if, being by myself, I minded swapping seats with her husband as he was sat in a different location. I thought “Sure, why not” I went over to him, he looked like he had won the lottery and kept asking if I was sure. I'm not the most observant and his seat looked okay, so yeah, I swapped.
It didn't take long for me to realize why he was so happy. If you saw the Opening Ceremony you may remember a huge tree at one end of the track, it was part of the ceremony. There was a section of seating stupidly placed right behind the tree, it blocked the view quite badly.
I kept looking over to them, they seemed so happy together, I didn't want to spoil their evening by swapping back. But I literally could not see anything with this tree in front of me, the people sat around me seemed to be complaining about it as well.
Eventually, with about 5 minutes before the ceremonies began, I asked the guy next to me if he was by himself—he was. I said fine, I'll get you a better seat. I went over to the couple, the stadium is full by now, so it was kind of awkward. I told them that the tree was bugging me and I'd like to swap back, but if they wanted to sit together they now could as there were now two seats available since I got matey to swap as well.
They looked so heartbroken but both went trudging off to the seats behind the tree. The wife, herself, thought twice about swapping and both looked back forlornly as they found their positions. Matey and I enjoyed a great opening ceremony, he couldn't believe his luck but I felt bad for the couple.
15. Lightning Strikes Twice
closeup photo of eyeglassesPhoto by Kevin Ku on UnsplashI used to be an IT intern and we would have to share weekend shifts in the data center. There would be one person there for 12 hours basically all alone with nothing to do. I switched shifts with one of the other interns so I could do something that weekend. Well that day there was a huge storm and they lost power. He had problems with the backup generator and after the UPS ran out the building lost power. I'm not exactly sure how he messed that one up, but the bosses were not happy and he didn't last long after that.
16. Whoops
a close-up of a notePhoto by Laura Rivera on UnsplashIn ninth grade, our teacher handed back our Algebra test and I had missed two problems on it. I wanted to know what the right answers were so I asked the girl next to me if she got them right. She looks at her test and sees that she did so she tells me what she came up with. Our answers were the same but mine were marked wrong and hers were marked right. We bring our sheets up to the teacher and she re-evaluates our tests.
It turns out that we were both wrong but the teacher just messed up grading the girls' test. She marks them wrong and gives the girl a lower grade. I felt so bad since she was just trying to help me out. But that’s not the worst part.
That would be that I had a huge crush on her so my chances went out the door with this incident.
17. Not My Brother’s Keeper
selective focus photography of people on busPhoto by Annie Spratt on UnsplashI was on a 56-hour bus ride. I was sleeping in the middle of the night when a woman began screaming "Stop touching me". The guy beside her tried to feel her up while she was sleeping. The bus driver asked if anyone would switch seats with him, no one was volunteering so I said I would. Only to realize that I just volunteered my brother to sit beside a creep.
18. Buckle Up
white and blue ambulance van traveling on roadPhoto by Jonnica Hill on UnsplashDuring high school, I began volunteering as an EMT and stuck with it for ten years (I actually only just retired a few weeks ago because I'm starting grad school). Early on, before I was qualified to be in charge, I rode a position called "co-pilot:" The ambulance I rode would be comprised of the driver and the officer up front, and I would ride in the back.
When we responded to calls, especially if they were nearby, I often wouldn't take the trouble to buckle my seatbelt and would try to prep equipment and bags so we could get to the patient as quickly as possible. One particular weekend I was riding extra on the ambulance (it wasn't my regular duty, I was just there for fun) and on a whim decided to leave a little early. Two hours later, my ambulance was responding to a call when disaster struck.
Two blocks away from our station got into a really bad accident. The ambulance had the light and had even slowed at the intersection, but they were T-boned by a driver who's pregnant wife was in labor and was racing to the hospital. The ambulance got knocked over and pushed 30' down the road from the impact.
Luckily, no one was injured, the baby was ultimately delivered safely, and the patient they were responding to was not a critical situation. But the equipment in the back was not secured or stored especially well, including the portable O2 bottle, and if I were on that unit I'm sure I would have been severely injured and very possibly wouldn’t have made it.
Afterward (and especially when I was in charge) I adhered firmly to "We're not going anywhere until everyone has their seatbelts on." In recent years, fire departments everywhere have increased efforts to foster a culture of safety, but traffic accidents remain the number one killers of first responders in the US.
19. Taking One For The Team
people sitting inside planePhoto by Hanson Lu on UnsplashI traded seats with a guy on a seven-hour flight so I could sit next to my girlfriend. He ended up sitting next to the two most annoying children on the whole plane. I felt bad during the flight but, I hate to say it, really didn't want to have to trade back.
After the flight, while waiting for baggage, I went up to him and said thanks again and sorry about that, I couldn't have foreseen that happening. He said no problem and that he "took one for the team." Nice guy.
20. Mystery Meat
a person holding a tray of doughnuts on a sidewalkPhoto by Clark Douglas on UnsplashI gave a fellow student explosive stomach problems and physically ruined his appearance before his big speech. I still remember his face.
There was this other guy in our college's required public speaking class who was extremely nervous about this speech he was going to give. Kid had to be just barely 18; definitely a freshman. I had this big break between my former class and the speech class, so I would just hang around the cafeteria finding stuff to do. I noticed him sitting down at a table alone, sweating and reading off note cards. I walked over and offered to buy the guy lunch, thinking I could help him calm down. He accepted.
The special of the day happened to be a meatball sub. His sub made it to the table, mine didn't. I don't remember what I tripped on, but I DO remember my meatball sub falling directly on his suit. It's not as if it simply spilled on his shirt, it's like all his clothing absorbed it. The meatballs had slammed into his suit and rolled down to his pants, enveloping his entire being in saucy goodness.
He didn't even say anything. He sat down in a chair and stared straight ahead. He had gone completely white in the face. I apologized profusely and ran straight off to our bookstore that thankfully sells clothing. I bought him some sweatpants and a sports jacket and ran back.
He was still in the same position. I gave him the clothes, telling him it was the best I could do, and re-apologized all over myself. He went and changed and came back, finished his meal, and it actually looked like he was calm, collected, and ready.
Got to the classroom, he starts his speech, and then it happens. He's halfway on some stupid diagram about how Morse code should be considered a language requirement when he stops literally mid-sentence. He ran to the bathroom. He never came out. The teacher had to give him an F, even though I found out later the sub had apparently given him stomach trouble and made him really sick.
I haven't eaten a meatball sub in six years now.
21. Mistakes Were Made
brown leather 3-seat sofaPhoto by Paul Weaver on UnsplashI had a friend who worked at a furniture store and would get an employee discount of 50%. I was moving and needed a couch, so he offered to buy it using his discount. He asked for my credit card, which I provided, then proceeded to buy the furniture at a discount with my card. His manager asks why it's being run on my card, and fires my friend.
I did think it was weird that he asked for my card, thinking it would be cleaner if I just paid him back, but since he was the one that asked for it I figured either the policy was ok with that, or that the name on the CC wouldn't blatantly be right there, and that he would know better...oops.
22. It’s All Yours
black Ford carPhoto by Michael Jin on UnsplashThis kid I knew ran and jumped into the passenger seat even though a friend of mine had called it. My friend was a super nice guy and let him have it and sat in the back seat. No one had any idea just what the innocent switch would cost them.
The car lost control around a corner and my friend got crushed between a tree and the car and didn’t make it. Sucks hard. The poor kid who took the front seat looked like a ghost at the memorial service.
23. The Unintentional Grinch
grey trash canPhoto by Pete Willis on UnsplashWhen I was a kid, my neighbors paid me to feed their dogs and collect their mail while on vacation. Every day I dutifully collected the mail and placed it in a brown paper bag in our laundry room. Two days before they were set to return, Dad was taking out the trash. He has bad eyes (retrolental fibroplasia), saw the bag, thought it was trash, and took it out with the rest of the garbage.
The worst part was that it was around the holidays, so there were several (quite valuable) Christmas gifts in the bag. Of course, he apologized profusely and paid them for the estimated value of the gifts, and the neighbors were incredibly understanding, but I still felt sick about it for a solid month. To this day, just thinking about it makes me cringe.
24. Cover Me
waitress serving costumer in diner during daytimePhoto by Adrien Olichon on UnsplashI can't think of a time when I've put someone in a bad situation. However, there was a time when I was put in the bad situation. I used to deliver pizza at this restaurant and worked with a guy who was in a band. His band would play shows almost every Friday, but he'd never request off. He'd just forget and try to call someone to cover the day of. Anyway, I got that call one day and said I'd cover for him. Since it was on about an hour's notice, I got to work and told my manager I'd just stay for the busy time (about 5-8 pm) and leave after that. He was cool with it, so I worked until about 8:30 that night and left.
Shortly after I leave, disaster strikes. The owner of the restaurant comes in, sees that I left early, freaks out, calls me up and fires me. I had worked there for 6 years and essentially got fired for coming in when I didn't have to and helping the company. What happened to the guy I covered for? He still works there. This was about three years ago. Yep.
25. Bus-ted
people sitting on bench in front of building during daytimePhoto by Sandy Ravaloniaina on UnsplashA man and I were waiting for the same bus to get home. He asks me if I know when the bus will arrive, and I tell him, though the bus seemed to be running a few minutes late. The bus we were looking for is barreling down the highway as a different bus is pulling into the transit center. I say "Hey, there it is," as our bus approaches. I board, take my seat, and notice that the man was not on the same bus as me. He boarded the other bus that had pulled in.
26. Pizza Peril
person holding pizza in boxPhoto by Arantxa Aniorte on UnsplashBack in 1995, while a student at UF, I delivered pizza for 5 Star Pizza in downtown Gainesville. I got to work one summer day around 5 pm, still very sunny out.
We had the standard first in first out for who got the next delivery. There was only one order to be delivered. It was close by, one block north of a major right, right across the street from the college campus.
I thought I was next up since I didn’t see anyone else logged in before me. I bagged things up and was almost out the door when this other driver—a long-haired skinny hippie type that maybe weighed 140 soaking wet—comes out from the back. He had been there first but I didn’t see him and he hadn’t logged in. So I gave up the run figuring it’s no big deal, they’ll be more soon enough.
He didn’t come back and a couple of hours later we get a call from the authorities. That’s when I found out the disturbing truth. Apparently, he was jumped by six males in their late teens/early 20s. They broke both his cheekbones, nose, jaw, some teeth, and wound up having to have facial reconstructive surgery.
When I saw him again two months later, he said they took his money as an afterthought. They just wanted to beat the snot outta someone.
27. The Price You Pay For Altruism
white sedan parked on parking lot during daytimePhoto by Guillaume TECHER on UnsplashI needed somebody to follow me to the mechanic shop. My car was riding dirty and I was worried it might break down on the way. As I was taking a right onto the freeway, my buddy didn't stop so he could stay right behind me and he got pulled over by a Highway Patrolman. He got a $175 ticket. I paid for half.
28. Winner Winner Burger Dinner
grayscale photography of man's portraitPhoto by Jorg Karg on UnsplashIn the 80s in Oxford, my dad felt sorry for a homeless guy begging for food so decided to take him for a meal at the nearby Wimpy’s. The guy was incredibly grateful and over his burger and shake let loose the tale of his life. Apparently it was full-on tragic. Wife left him, took the kids and the dog, he got dependent on the demon drink. He lost his job, then his house, all his money, this guy was at rock bottom.
But here was this stranger, my dad, buying him a meal, listening to his story—the homeless guy was pathetically grateful. My dad left early with an apology—the guy still eating—he had to get a train to Durham. Full of pride at the good deed he'd done, he had just left Stevenage when he made a chilling realization.
He had forgotten to pay the bill at Wimpy’s, leaving the tab firmly in the hands of the penniless tramp. My dad says he has never felt guiltier in his life.
29. The Picky Eater
a baby crying while laying on a bedPhoto by Katie Smith on UnsplashI breastfed my eldest son. Once, when he was five months old, my husband and I wanted to go out to a ball. So my sister offered to babysit him. When I asked what she was going to do, she told me just to get some formula and bottles, and I'd be right.
So, that's what I did. We went out, had a wonderful night, and my husband won the prize for best dressed.
Now, this was in the days before cell phones were widespread in Australia. I come home six hours after leaving and find out the kid wouldn't take the bottle, and has been screaming non-stop for five of the hours we'd been out. I apologized profusely. The poor thing. She was really cool about it though. Never imposed on her again to babysit—I figure she'd done her tour of duty.
30. The Worst Game Of “Would You Rather” Ever
man covering his mouthPhoto by Kyle Glenn on UnsplashI was taking the bus home from the city to my house (about 40 minutes) and it was EXTREMELY bright outside from the sun. My bus finally came right on the dot at 5:37 PM. But there was something that I didn’t know.
This bus was actually the 260, and NOT the 250 I was supposed to be getting on. However, the bus route is exactly the same, except for the exit it takes on the freeway, which all looks the same to me as a 15-year-old. When it exited the freeway, I knew where I was, but I knew this wasn't where I was supposed to be going. I ask the guy next to me if this was the 250, he says no, this is the 260.
At this point, I'm just like ugh, and quickly head to the front of the bus to ask the driver where the nearest transit center or park ride he was heading to was. He tells me he isn't going near one and suggests I get off here and grab this other bus, so I do.
I notice a Pump It Up—one of those kids' rec centers—across the street, which I recognized because I had driven by it before. Now I'm sitting here an hour away from my home, and I start to panic. I try to calm myself and check my phone, and call my friend who lives in the area, to see if he can tell me a bus I could take to get home.
He picks up right away and I explain my situation, he then tells me some good news. "Ayyyy man we're down at the marina you should come join us mannn, it's a party doooood, not too far from where you're at too". But I'm a bit scared so I ask him if he could just pick me up, and he's like "Ugh fine, hold tight I'll be there in a bit." Big mistake.
So I head over to the Pump It Up and chill there for a bit, but then one of the chicks working there, who were all really nice and let me hang out in the lobby, says that the bus out there goes right to where I want to go to get to the marina. So I call my friend back and try to let him know I don't need a ride anymore. But what's this, my phone’s battery is about to die.
Now at this point, I'm just like ugh how am I going to contact him? One of the girls working there, again, really great people, lets me borrow her phone so I can message him on Facebook, and hope he sees it in time.
So I get on the bus, and then get off at a transit center and mosey on over to the marina. I get there all excited, look around—but I don’t like what I find. I don't see any of my buddies, so I keep on looking around as there's a lot of people there. After about 10 minutes I realize no one I know is there. I walk for another 20 minutes to the local library and ask the librarian if I can call my mom because my phone died and I need a ride home.
Now at this point, I'm sitting out there on the library steps at 8 pm, feeling like a total loser, abandoned by his friends. I use the library Wi-Fi to check my Facebook messages. I notice there's an option to check the locations of where a mobile message on Facebook was sent, as I accidentally clicked on it when going through my messages.
I click on it, and make an irritating realization. I see it was sent from a marina, but not the marina I was at. Turns out they were at the OTHER major marina in the area, across the city, that we hadn't hung out at for like two years. I had gone to the other major marina where we almost always meet up. Now I'm practically fuming and in my head I'm like "WHY DIDN'T THEY TELL ME THIS".
When I get home I send him a long nasty message on Facebook (we're really good friends so I knew it wouldn't be too extreme to call him out like that). He replies and tells me, dude, let me explain what happened to me, and all your anger shall disappear. That’s when I find out the real story. My day was nothing compared to his.
He tells me "I was nearly at Pump It Up and I was waiting at a really long, drawn-out red light. Do you remember how I got my wisdom teeth out the other day? Yeah well I have to take this medication for it. A medication that realllllyyyy loosens up the plumbing and renders any control of them, useless. Now this was a very, very ill-timed light, and unfortunately I didn't make it. I tried to hold it, but it broke through”.
The story continued: “Fortunately I had my bathing suit with me, and turned into the gas station nearby and put that on. I got home and was going to throw them out, happy to be done with this horrific incident, when my mom stopped me and said "Oh no, I paid 20 bucks for these shorts. You're cleaning them out."
Suddenly walking like a loser on the beach and awkwardly looking around only to not find anyone I knew, then waiting for my mom at the library at 8 o'clock at night, didn't feel too bad.
31. Double Whammy
person wearing face mask near trees at daytimePhoto by nick olson on UnsplashMy mom was working at a craft store, as a cashier. It was getting late, and after a long shift she had to go to the bathroom. There were hardly any customers in the store, so she got her friend to cover for her. On her way back from the bathroom, she sees some guy in a ski-mask run up to her friend with a knife. Everybody was freaking out in the store, and the guy made off with a bunch of money. Luckily, her friend sustained no wounds. However, shortly thereafter, she passed out and hit her head pretty hard.
32. The Freshman Fake-Out
aerial photography green and white concrete buildingPhoto by Parker Gibbons on UnsplashFirst week on campus freshman year, I was walking out of a first-year seminar and ended up talking with a moderately cute girl on the way out. Once we were outside, she said she got turned around easily and asked if I could point her to North campus (I go to Ohio State, so it's one of the biggest campuses in the country and extremely easy to get very lost, mostly only your first week though). I lived on North too, but instead of being cool and asking if I could walk her to her dorm, I just pointed her North.
I got a call just as she was walking off and stopped for a minute to talk. During that minute I realized I’d made a huge mistake. I was also turned around and had pointed her South, with South campus being a somewhat shady area to be walking around in after 10. She was too far to catch up to. I just walked back to my dorm.
Two weeks later I talked to her again, she wasn't too angry, but said she was trying to decide if I was mistaken as well or just a jerk. Regardless, I found out we lived in the same dorm.
33. Duck!
save up to 50% Black Friday clip artPhoto by Ashkan Forouzani on UnsplashI was working a double on Black Friday at a store in a strip mall. On my break, I ran over to the Qdoba a few shops down and got in line. The guy in front of me turned and recognized me; I had rung him out a few hours prior, and he asked if I was done. I said no, I was working midnight-noon, and he told me to cut in front of him, he had three kids in the car plus his wife and himself that he was ordering for and didn't want me to waste more time in line. So I said thank you very much and we traded places.
There was now a woman standing behind him holding a baby. Not two minutes after we changed spots in line, this baby projectile vomited all over this nice man's back, and the woman just muttered an apology before rushing off.
That could have been me, nine hours into a (Black Friday) shift with a few more to go.
34. It’s Lonely At The Top
ferris wheel near body of water during daytimePhoto by Patrick Humm on UnsplashI was at a fair a couple months ago, and I was waiting in line with my friends for the Ferris wheel. When we were at the very front of the line, we saw some crying children behind us (I don't know why they were crying). We let them go in front of us, and they got on the last seat on the ride. I’ll never forget what happened next.
As soon as they got up to the top, the Ferris wheel broke down. Everyone was stuck on it for the next hour. I felt so bad.
35. What We’ve Got Here Is A Failure To Communicate
File:DakToVietnam1966.jpg - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.org
My grandfather was a Marine who served in Vietnam. He was supposed to take a plane to a different base he was supposed to be at, but the end of the runway had a huge mountain right there. Fearful that the plane would hit the mountain and explode, he refused to board.
Unfortunately the plane did hit the mountain and blew up. Not a single person survived. No one knew that he hadn’t been on the plane. A week later, he went to a store to get bed sheets.
The guy there turned white as a ghost thinking that the man in front of him was a ghost—he’d just happened to have read his obituary!
36. Road Raging
white and blue police car on roadPhoto by Jonathan Cooper on UnsplashI was driving on the highway, passing people and being passed like normal. I pass this one guy and then go back into the right lane once I'm a safe distance ahead. Then I switch on the cruise control. Problem is, I didn't switch on the cruise control. I drop 15 mph before I notice my mistake and the guy behind me rightfully gets angry.
We continue driving, we both pass each other a few times over the next hour or so like normal. But at this point he is so sick of me that absolutely guns it up to 90 mph just to get as far away from me as he can. I can’t believe what I saw next.
Four minutes later I pass him again but this time he is pulled over by a cop on the side of the highway. If you're reading this, I'm sorry I got you a ticket.
37. A Slip Of The Pen
black pen on white backgroundPhoto by Kiran CK on UnsplashOnce in a class, me and a friend were playing a stupid game where we weren't allowed to touch a specific pen. So we would use paper, other pens, etc to push the pen across the table to make the other person touch it. The pen eventually fell and I asked a girl close to where it landed if she could pick it up for me.
She reached down and as she starts to pick it up toward me, I say quickly "don't hand it to me, just set it on the table." She picked up the wrong pen. The one she picked up had broken and ink was all over her hand. Obviously she assumed the whole thing was a prank by me to make her get ink all over her hand.
38. Come On And Take A Free Ride
brown and gray 3-story buildingPhoto by Rosie Kerr on UnsplashI got flown down to New Orleans to compete in Tales of the Cocktail. Flight, hotel and some expenses were taken care of. When I landed, I met up with someone from my home city who offered me a seat in her ride. As we're walking to baggage claim, she points off to the side and says "Is that you?" it's a driver holding a sign with my first initial and my last name.
I thank the girl for the offer and hop in the car. The driver goes to confirm my destination which was different than I was originally told, so I call up my contact. I thank her for the car and ask her if my accommodations have changed. She says, "We didn't arrange a car for you..."
That’s when I enacted my devious plan. I roll with it, have the driver take me to my hotel, and ask her if everything, including tip, has been taken care of. She tells me that it has been and I slip her a $20 figuring she's only a few minutes away from receiving an angry phone call.
39. Missed Connection
shallow focus of a woman's sad eyesPhoto by Louis Galvez on UnsplashI was invited to a party where a girl tried to give me a lap dance. After she was done she told me to meet her in the bathroom. The girl wasn't my type, and I was dating someone, so I sent my friend instead.
Long story short: the two of them hooked up in the bathroom and the girl of his dreams, who was also at the party, found out and never spoke to him again. It turns out that, after five years of knowing him, she started to have feelings for him and this whole situation ruined everything. Oops.
40. Bad Timing
silhouette of buildings under dark skyPhoto by History in HD on UnsplashMy uncle works for Wells Fargo and was supposed to go on a business trip that would take him to their office in NYC, but he came down with the flu the week of the trip and asked a co-worker to go in his place. Well…their office was in the World Trade Center and the trip took place in September 2001.
His co-worker didn’t make it home. I'm glad my uncle's okay, but my entire family feels bad about it. My uncle went to therapy for a while and did everything he could to support and comfort the man's widow, who is a lovely person and never blamed my uncle for what happened.
41. Suzy The Savior
man in blue dress shirt standing in airplanePhoto by Lukas Souza on UnsplashThis very timid-looking mother called a flight attendant over to me and her to have her ask me to switch seats with her son who was two rows up. I had the luxurious aisle seat, and the son had the very awful middle seat, but I said I would switch. I move all my stuff only to make an unpleasant discovery. I find a huge guy has taken the aisle seat. It's a full flight and boarding has finished. I squeeze my way into the middle seat and force my armrests down, only to have the Huge guy inform me that cannot happen due to his size.
During our flight a stewardess came over to our aisle and says to the man that in the future he has to purchase two seats. She sees me in my uncomfortable state and tells me she has something to show me. She takes me to the back of the plane to hang out with the other stewardesses for the remainder of the flight. They had an extra fold-down seat for me. If you are reading this, thank you Suzy the stewardess.
42. Mother Doesn’t Know Best
File:Walmart Electronics Department- Manitowoc, WI - Flickr ...commons.wikimedia.org
At Wal-Mart back in '99, my mom took me to buy a new game for the N64. I was determined to buy Star Wars Episode 1: Racer. Apparently there was another kid who had the same idea. When we got there, there was only one copy left. I luckily got the game, and the kid wasn't too happy. His mom said, "It's okay, we'll just get you this one instead."
The game she picked out? Superman 64—famously one of the worst video games of all time.
43. I’d Hit The Ceiling
silhouette of man in snow stormPhoto by Zac Durant on UnsplashOne winter there was a huge, freak snowstorm so the hospital I work at rented out a nice hotel within walking distance to ensure there would be enough staff the next day. I put my name down for a room before my dad let me know that he would pick me up and drop me off in his big ol' truck. I gave my spot to a co-worker I barely knew—this cutie little energetic blonde college student.
She was extremely thankful she didn't have to drive back to her dorm several miles away. The next day she looks kind of grouchy and disheveled and informs me that the ceiling caved in on her in the middle of the night OVER her bed and she got an icy, insulation and drywall soup bath.
44. Don’t Be Shellfish
four shrimps on top of icePhoto by AM FL on UnsplashWhile I was going on a two-hour flight to see my parents, this guy asked if I could switch seats with him so he could sit near his family. I said sure and switched seats. Later on, it turned out that the overhead bin over what used to be my seat was dripping on him—but it was so much more disgusting than just a simple leak.
It turned out that someone had carried on a box full of raw shrimp and put them in ice, and it had started smelling and dripping onto the seat. I felt bad but relieved at the same time.
45. Thanks For Your Consideration
two women sitting beside table and talkingPhoto by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on UnsplashI interviewed for a job that I wanted desperately in August 2019. After the initial phone interview, I went in for an in-person interview at 4 PM on a Wednesday. I had a rejection in my inbox by 8 PM and was completely gutted. I don’t know who got the job, but 2020 happened, and they laid off 60% of their staff and will probably go under. I'm thankful for that rejection every day.
46. From Cologne To Stink
grayscale photo of three person sitting inside airplanePhoto by Annie Williams on UnsplashI was traveling by plane from Cologne, Germany to JFK after spring break. Coincidentally, there also was a large group of kids traveling on the same flight, some of whom were delayed. Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against them, but this literally was the worst flight I have ever experienced.
The first seat I had was next to a friend of mine who was happy to sit next to someone she knew, considering how large the plane was, but I also knew at the time that she had a "thing" for a friend of mine, so when he offered to switch with me to sit next to her, I obliged. Worst mistake ever.
I had to sit next to two kids for the entire 9-hour flight, and both of them soiled themselves in the beginning and middle of the flight. They never went to the restroom once. The smell that lingered in the air around me was so horrid, my eyes were tearing up the entire flight.
The one to my left, who was about 18 or 19, stared at me the entire flight and kept screaming at me in random gibberish. Again, I have nothing against them, but I still had an awful time and I couldn't even sleep because of the screaming.
47. Ready To Pop
parked blue and black Compertur busPhoto by Jonathan Borba on UnsplashBack in the late 90s I was seeing a guy who lived about two hours away. So I would take a Greyhound bus to spend the weekends with him. Well this trip there were tons of people going so they broke it into two busloads.
I was early in line to get on the bus, but decided to wait and let some of the older people behind me in line go first. So I ended up on the second bus. Well about halfway there we see the first bus go off the road to a gas station at some random point and we lost track of it from there.
Once we got to the station, we found out what had really happened to the bus.
There had been a very pregnant girl on the first bus who couldn't fit in the bathroom stall. She begged the driver to stop at a gas station because she HAD to go. He refused. So she returned to her seat and simply couldn't hold it any longer. She soiled herself.
That's when the driver finally decided to pull off to a gas station. There was an RN on the bus who helped her clean up. I felt so bad for her and the other passengers. I couldn't believe that driver wouldn't make an exception for a woman who looked ready to pop at any moment.
48. Smile!
man standing in front of a poolPhoto by Kenny Eliason on UnsplashMy brother covered my shift at the pool we lifeguarded at while I was at freshman orientation for college. He was helping the manager change the large CO2 tanks for the filtration system and when he pulled on the safety cap to tilt the tank the cap popped off and he essentially punched himself in the mouth with a couple pound piece of metal...broke all four front teeth. Top and bottom. He spat shards of teeth out into his hand and the manager had to drive him to the emergency room. I felt so bad.
49. Spice Roulette
cooked meat on panPhoto by Taylor Kiser on UnsplashA co-worker and I ordered a delivery of Indian food after a successful business trip. There was a homeless man that perched outside the hotel we were staying at and we'd seen him frequently on smoke breaks. He would wait until a large crowd was entering and beeline to the lobby bathrooms to freshen up. Seemed like an all-around nice guy, just must've had a tough break.
Anyway, when the food arrived, we both saw the look on his face across the street and promptly opened the bags to give him some naan and "whatever was in that top container". They were all those plastic takeaway Tupperware things so we couldn't tell.
Wrapping this up, when we ordered the food, we were just asking for things that had cool names, and when we got to one item, they asked us how spicy we'd like it. We answered, "As spicy as you can make it." Nothing in our meal was spicy when we ate, and we didn't see him the next day. I can only assume what happened and hope he was okay.
50. The Never-Ending Journey
plane wing through glass windowPhoto by William Bayreuther on UnsplashMy roommate and I were flying to Germany on buddy passes and his priority level was wayyyy higher than mine, I was booted off the flight if he went so he sacrificed himself and got the next flight that was a city over so I could get on this one. So his plane turned out to be an hour late, then they couldn’t take off because of something wrong with an engine, so they sat on the runway for four hours.
By the time they found a new plane the pilots had been on the clock for too long, so they had to wait two hours for new pilots, then the next plane had computer problems that took two hours to fix. Then he finally landed in Germany, but since it was the next town over he had to take a train to the city we were staying in (Frankfurt) and his train was two hours late from electrical issues.
Redditor TopDoggo16 wanted to hear about the inventors throughout history who were taken out by their own creations, so they asked:
"What are some examples of an inventor getting killed by their own invention?"
This is why I never played with Legos or got into construction.
If I build a wall, it will fall on me.
Homemade Horror
Helicopter Abandon Thread GIF by Black Rifle Coffee CompanyGiphy"That Indian lad who was flight-testing his own, homemade helicopter. Part of the rotor sliced open his head."
peekedtoosoon
"Damn, I watched the video and it was so unlucky. The tail rotor broke and pinged up into the main rotor which broke at an angle that hit him. I mean any number of things could have gone wrong in a homemade helicopter but it's just crazy how that sequence of events occurred. Could just as easily have pinged in a different way and not killed him."
postvolta
Tangled
"Thomas Midgley Jr., a key contributor to leaded gasoline and the usage of CFC in refrigeration. After contracting Polio, he created a system of pulleys and whatnot to help him get out of bed. He was found dead at age 55 after getting tangled in his device and being strangled by it."
heyoyo10
"Just because it wasn't mentioned here I figure I would. Thomas Midgley Jr. not only almost solely responsible for probably the worst environmental and ozone damage from a single cause. He is solely responsible for the death of 100,000,000 people from CFC and TEL."
theglizzymonster
BOOM!!
"Max Valier tried using alcohol-based fuel for rockets, it blew up in his lab killing him."
LemonsForLimeaid
"To be fair, a lot of people have died trying to make rocket propellants. The stuff does tend to go BOOM, all of a sudden."
Lone_Beagle
"Alcohol is a common fuel for amateur rockets. Also, I believe the Soviets used alcohol as fuel in a couple of their rocket engines."
BDady
"Alcohol fuel was used extensively for the V2, but I don't know if it's the same mix. The Nazis found it had an unusually high rate of 'evaporation.'"
wolfkeeper
Afterglow
"Maria Skłodowska-Curie was one of the discoverers of radioactivity. She discovered Polonium and Radium. As far as I know, researchers did not know/believe that radioactivity might have a negative impact on their bodies and therefore they used little to no protection."
Equivalent_Meal2688
"Oddly enough, it was her work with x-ray imaging that is thought to have done her the most harm."
cramduck
"She used it as a night light. I’m really not joking, it was reported that she would keep some on her bedside table at night."
"As per the Nobel Prize website..."
"Pierre, who liked to say that radium had a million times stronger radioactivity than uranium, often carried a sample in his waistcoat pocket to show his friends. Marie liked to have a little radium salt by her bed that shone in the darkness."
"She lies in a coffin with inch-thick lead, and her remains are expected to be radioactive for at least another 1500 years."
Eviscerate_Bowels224
Cupid Failed
Online Dating Flirting GIF by LIEBESLEBENGiphy"Not killed, but the founder of Match.com, Gary Kremen, lost his girlfriend to a man that she met on Match.com."
OneGuyJeff
Those apps and websites were always going to ruin everything.
NEXT!
homer simpson submarine GIFGiphy"Horace Hunley, who killed himself and a bunch of others aboard a submarine he built over 150 years before the current whack job."
tuckerx78
"Yes. Drowned the entire crew, they dragged it up, drained it out, and shouted, 'NEXT!' Then it sank after detonating an explosive charge on the Housatonic, recovered more than a century later, and is now in a museum."
raflcopter
Off the Cliff
"Not the inventor, but rather the owner of the Segway, Jimi Heselden, accidentally rode off a cliff on a Segway."
KafkasBalaclava
"Jesus, you just brought back memories of cities being filled with segways before e-scooters happened."
TheMantasMan
"I remember before the Segway came out, the news was going crazy about how it would be this revolutionary technology. There was talk of free energy for cities, personal hover cars, they said cities would be rebuilt around the technology, and there would be no more roads, etc. all sorts of crazy sh*t. Then it came out and... well... yeah. Huge disappointment after all the hype."
un-sub
Brazen
"Some ancient Greek dude created a torture device called the Brazen Bull. It’s just a large metal husk shaped like a bull where you put a victim inside and heat the bottom. The burning heat and scalding metal will cause the agonized victim to go to a horn inside the husk in an attempt to breathe. The horn will make it sound like bull noises on the outside. The inventor showed a king his contraption. The king was delighted by it and decided to test it out… on the inventor."
SatisfactionSenior65
4/14/12
"The guy who built the Titanic: Thomas Andrews. Thomas Andrews was an Irish businessman and shipbuilder. As the naval architect in charge of the plans for the ocean liner RMS Titanic, he was traveling on board that vessel during her maiden voyage when the ship hit an iceberg on 14 April 1912. He perished along with more than 1,500 others. His body was never recovered."
SFJetfire
Finishing Touches
Sport Halloween GIF by Columbus Blue JacketsGiphy"The Denver airport is known for a giant statue of a blue demon horse. While the artist was working on finishing touches, part of it came loose and severed an artery in his leg and he bled to death."
JellyNinja_
Well, now I'm glad I don't know how to make anything.
It's a gamble when I cook if I'm gonna die from food poisoning.
