Parents Break Down The Moment They Realized It Wasn't Hormones, Their Kids Are Just Jerks
I grew up watching Turner Classic Movies. One of my favorites? Mervyn LeRoy's The Bad Seed, one of the top American films of 1956. The film, based on the bestselling novel by William March, is about a fragile housewife who slowly begins to suspect that her precocious eight-year-old daughter is murdering people in town. The film has served as the inspiration for other films about killer kids ranging from 1981's Bloody Birthday to 1993's The Good Son and 2009's Orphan.
But we're not talking about killer kids here... hopefully your own child doesn't grow up to burn someone alive in a basement. What if your child grows up to be, you know, just a jerk, and then maybe, just maybe, far more than that? After Redditor Fred-the-human asked the online community, "Parents, when did you realize it wasn't teenage hormones and your kid is a legitimate butthole?" parents (and others) shared their stories.
"My wife wasn't connecting the dots."
It's my stepson.
My wife wasn't connecting the dots. I finally pointed out that he's 30 which is how old I was when we got married. He's got no skills and no education and no career prospects but he does have a bunch of felonies. That got the wheels spinning but when she was taking our daughter for a walk with some little kids that they were babysitting they found him passed out in a car in the side of the road, obviously coming down from whatever he was on she finally got it. So she kicked him out and he threw a big tantrum and smashed stuff and cussed her out on his way out the door.
I let her know that if she ever tries to move him into the house again, I'm grabbing our daughter and moving out and that it won't be a discussion.
"He only realized it..."
Not me, but my grandfather recently learned the true colors of his narcissistic son (my uncle) after fifty years. He only started realizing after my grandmother passed away this year and my uncle has been a total piece of s*** to my grandfather. It's sad that it took so long and it is now driving a rift between my uncle and my grandfather.
"If his mother won't do what he wants..."
I knew my stepson was lying all the time within a couple of months of his mother and I getting married. My ex-best friend from HS was a lot like him on the lying part.
Couple of years later, he kicks in our back door after going missing for a week (he's 15 at this point), and steals electronics. Cops called, he's apprehended 30 minutes later headed for the pawn shop. My wife still isn't accepting reality at this point. He spends 6 weeks locked up in a boot-camp style facility. Comes back, is like a different person for less than a week. His birthday comes around, he goes off the rails, locked up for 6 months.
He's been in and out of the county jail for the last 7 years. He's a sociopath. He can emulate feelings, but has no real connection to people. He wants what he wants and if he has to take from someone else, so be it. If his mother won't do what he wants, he gets emotionally abusive. Until last summer when he put her in the hospital. I officially disowned him, and she agreed. For about 3 months. She just won't defend herself. I have to be a major ahole about it to try to protect her. She still went over $5K in debt for him and the 3rd baby by the 3rd baby momma. Our relationship rides on a thin razor's edge when it comes to him.
"The middle one is constantly belittling her sister..."
My oldest daughter has a learning disability. My middle daughter is in Pre AP classes. The middle one is constantly belittling her sister fir not knowing certain things. She walks around with this I'm better than you attitude. We didn't raise her that way. My wife will tell her bluntly to stop being terrible to her sister.
"My mother finally cut my brother off..."
My mother finally cut my (47) brother off after 25 years. She gave him 2k a month or more, and still pays his cell bill. I told her if she wanted to tear through every cent she had and then complain that he made no effort to call her (unless the check was late), I was bailing out of the picture. She also realized his unemployed @ss was too busy to help take care of her. I think she knew years ago he was a lazy manipulative person, but he's the baby and she could never say no. Anyway, f*** my family.
"We found out..."
Adding this to stress medical issues: My son was a legitimate butthole for most of his teenage years. Terrorized his younger brother, had to argue about everything! He saw his pediatrician regularly and a psychiatrist. In his late teens, he suffered with depression and anxiety. I asked his new doctor (adult primary care physician) to run thyroid tests. I had depression and anxiety at his age and wasn't tested until I was 24. I found out that I have hypothyroidism.
We found out that although his thyroid was ok, he had a very strange level of testosterone. Very low. Once he started replacement therapy, his attitude, depression, and anxiety all improved!
His doctor told me that she wouldn't have even thought about testing him because of his age but she was glad that I had pushed for it.
"In all honesty..."
In all honesty waaaaaaay before they were even teenagers.
My stepson and daughter are one of the significant reasons that I'm planning to end my relationship with their mother.
They are 10 and 12, I've known them since they were 6 and 8.
I've tried really hard to engage with them and parent them as equally as I do my own children, but they just don't get it.
Their mother treats them like they're little angels whilst they sit on their arses all day glued to screens. They're a couple of years behind the usual in reading and in maths and I'd hoped to use lockdown as an opportunity to get them up to speed but it was thrown back at me with surly behaviour and non-engagement, I received no support from their mother so I ended up giving up as it was pretty obvious I was wasting my time.
I've come to realise two things, you can't educate pork and you can't help those who won't help themselves.
"Watching them figure it out..."
My parents didn't realize until my sister was 30. Watching them figure it out was heartbreaking. For years it was "oh, you all do it to each other" and suddenly it was "oh, this isn't a healthy relationship for any of us" real quick. They realized we hadn't been exaggerating about anything, but she had flat out been lying for years. They stopped putting up with her s***, she chose to cut contact with all of us, got even madder when we all said we'd give her the space she wanted, she wanted us to "fight for her." Mum is the only one who talks to her now. Plus side, my parents, other sister and I have the best familial relationship we've ever had.
"She used her diagnosis..."
My sister would always explode at the drop of a hat, destroy everything, get extremely violent, etc. She'd see things and get increasingly paranoid. Eventually she began to self medicate with drugs and alcohol.
Later in life, I convinced her to get help and she was diagnosed with bipolar and schizophrenia. (Duh.) At that point I was like, "oh she really can't help it. Things will get better now!"
Ha. No.
She used her diagnosis to doctor shop and find one who prescribes things to her that get her high, but exacerbate her symptoms. She uses her diagnosis as an excuse to be absolutely awful and abuse people. She's in and out of jail and constantly fighting with someone. Still took me until this year to realize that that's who she is and to give up. Sometimes you just really wanna believe you can love the evil out of someone.
"She doesn't understand..."
My daughter is five and she's stone cold. She doesn't understand the meaning of the words she uses, but she knows the effect they will have on people. We're legit worried about what happens when the hormones show up.
"Not that she did anything terrible..."
My step sister has always been incredibly lazy and worked harder to not do housework than actually help out. She would throw tantrums to not go to school, not wash dishes, and everyone just kind of let it off as hormones. I always ended up doing all her chores.
Not that she did anything terrible like some poeple in this thread, but one thing she did was lie. She lied a lot and one of them split my family apart and drove my step-moms depression and bipolar disorder over the edge. She also just had no opinion or good characteristics. I always say, she is a blank canvas that everyone else paints on. Especially her mother. Her mother thinks she is the most amazing person in the world, better than my brother and I, who both work and have a life of our own.
She wrote a letter to my father years later when he left the house basically blaming him for her depression and everything that went wrong in the family, another lie. Ive known this girl since i was 11. Became my sister and yet she threw us under the bus for nothing. Luckily I have a half sister with much better qualities than her who loves and adores my brother and I.
Fyi. Now she is 23, dropped out of College, no potential, engaged and all she wants to do is sit at home and do nothing.
"She was two years older..."
My sister is a pretty terrible person. We were raised the same way - fairly open. I had absolutely no restrictions: I could have girls in my room, I had absolutely no curfew, my parents even thought I went to one of my friend's house to smoke pot and let me (we actually stayed up all night playing Halo in a cabin, so my eyes were red and I smelled like I tried to cover up any smell using fireplace smoke).
She was two years older and had more restrictions placed on her due to her doing things like sneaking out and driving home drunk.
They probably could have punished her more when we were children. She would always start the fights, and when we were left alone in the house she would sadistically attack me. She would pound on my door for hours, and since I didn't have a lock I needed to sit in front of it holding it shut. I don't really blame them though, as there was no way for them to know..what I wouldn't have gave for a video recording device like every kid has now.
Anyways, I think some people are just going to be bad people, and there's not much you can do about it. She genuinely takes pleasure in other people's pain. It's pretty ironic she became a nurse.
"He managed to convince the doctor..."
My mom says it was when my brother was 3.
It was the mid 80s and he used to beat the s*** out of us whenever we stepped "outta line" so my mom took him to a therapist to have him evaluated. He managed to convince the doctor that my mother was hitting us. She was spanking, but my brother made it sound like she used him as a punching bag, and Child Protective Services had to investigate. Nothing came of it,but my parents yanked him from therapy; my parents have been too afraid to discipline him ever since, and he basically emotionally scarred the hell out of us other 3 siblings.
Now he's a 34 year old ex-Navy hoarder that "remodels reclaimed properties" and lives on his own. He has girlfriends, but eventually he breaks them down so hard they either get smart and run, or they snap and either become alcoholics or try to kill him. The "love of his life" did both.
"The good news is..."
I can't speak for my mom, but I first realized my brother is a s***** person when he kicked her out of her house (he was living with her) on Christmas Eve one year because he was throwing a party he'd been planning "for a long time" (he was 27, if that matters). Mom and my (then-9-year-old) half-brother had plans, but had to cancel because they got sick and wanted to spend a quiet evening at home. Older bro generously booked them a hotel room for the night, which was where she called me from in tears.
He'd always been a self-centered, sensitive ass but that was when it finally dawned on me that he wasn't a good person. The good news is that he's cut me out of his life over a facebook post I made (I complained that I had to buy my own car when our parents bought him three so far because he keeps wrecking them). He sent me an angry text that he doesn't want to speak to me for the rest of my life (he specified my life because I'm a terminal cancer patient) and ignored all my attempts to apologize. I cried for hours, but the next day I realized I'm way better off without him.
"The first time I saw..."
My girlfriend's 5 year old. The first time I saw an extremely friendly dog run from her I raised an eyebrow. Then I got to see her try to control the world and just be a general a-hole. It blows my mind how animals see right through people...
"And then there's the other one."
My aunt has two of the nicest children I've ever met. They're smart, kind, and funny, and love everyone to bits.
And then there's the other one.
My aunt knew her children were ass***** from before they were born. She didn't want a kid... So instead she had 3 with a guy she knew was cheating on her. But she had three and it was done, and now she's a single mom who absolutely hates her kids. She does anything to avoid spending time with them.
As I said, the youngest two are as great as they can be in such a predicament. She despises them the most. I've never seen her speak with either beyond simple commands.
The oldest is a piece of s***. He's the worst person I have ever met. And she ADORES him. He hits his younger sister in the face? Well obviously she was annoying him. He punches every man he meets in the junk? Oh, he's just playing!! He refuses to call any of us by our familiar titles (he won't say "grandma and grandpa", he calls my grandma either by her first name or "toots".... A far cry better than childhood, when he'd call her "sugartits" cause he heard it on TV)
He's abusive, obnoxious, and overall horrible. My aunt has yet to recognize this. We all knew it from the day he was born.
"My aunt realized this..."
My aunt realized this when he punched me in the mouth at 4. He was in his 20s for the record at the time this happened. But my aunt's denial was so strong that she ignored all of the signs of it. Now he's paralyzed from the neck down and she is taking care of him. He still verbally abuses her. I wish he died in that accident instead of being paralyzed.
"I feel a lot of it..."
As the younger brother of someone who is a near constant arsehole to our parents the truth is most decent parents won't admit that their kid turned out a bad person. They just see themselves as the blame, that they did something wrong or try to find explanations such as mental illness (to be fair he's been diagnosed but nothing finite, either way he's still a fully functioning adult, no learning disabilities). I remember him always being a little s***, he hated seeing my parents giving me praise. My parents always describe it misbehaving as a child, pulling fire alarms and destroying shop displays as well.
I feel a lot of it does come from my parents being too lenient on him or not encouraging empathy at least. That's the biggest tell if you ask me, if you can see that your child can't recognise the negative feelings they're producing in others by the age of 8 then you need to get them help. You shouldn't consider it just a phase by that point, children are a lot smarter than most adults give them credit, they have the emotional capacity to recognise emotional pain in others by 8 (baring learning difficulties which in itself requires them getting extra help) ultimately they're not doing so for other reasons and need to understand how it feels to be on the end of the abuse they generate.
People Explain Which Things Blew Their Minds Once They Realized Them
"Reddit User r3tr0gam3r83 asked: 'What is something that blew your mind once you realized it?'"
Every moment we breathe is a moment to learn something new.
What's funny is the more we learn, the more we're shocked.
Some knowledge is so obvious it's stunning how oblivious we are.
Like, "How did I not know this sooner?'
And no matter what I can still be shocked.
Redditor r3tr0gam3r83 wanted to hear about which realizations in life have left people SHOOK, so they asked:
"What is something that blew your mind once you realized it?"
Avocados are not vegetables.
They're fruits, berries to be exact.
Like what?!?!
Colleagues
GIF by Bud LightGiphy"Sometimes it is more important to like your colleagues than the actual job."
"I had shi**y jobs with the most amazing colleagues and had shi**y colleagues and the most amazing job. I'd pick the first every time."
chr989
Star Trekking
"That you could legitimately travel at warp speed through the center of galaxies and never run any real risk of hitting a star. That’s how spread out space really is."
justanotherguyhere16
"Also, galaxies, stars, and even the Universe is constantly moving. I think time travel has been invented, but they can’t figure out the 'space' part of it.
"Yes, they can travel back in time, but relatively speaking, they can’t figure out how to navigate to the part of the planet they want to reach. So when they travel back in time, it’s relative to where they currently are, and end up not moving through space, thus ending up in the middle of an empty vacuum."
theknights-whosay-Ni
Jaws is Old
"That sharks predated the rings of Saturn."
BeardedDominant
"Sharks also developed the immune system that ended up in both dinosaurs/birds and mammals."
csiz
"We don’t know that. We can’t say for certain that the rings are only 100 million years old. It’s still debated."
The_Kek_5000
"I'm pretty sure that sharks are older than trees."
Cayderent
From the Trees
"One day I sat on a tram, passing a river. There was a duck in a tree. I realized I'd never seen ducks in trees. No one else seemed to notice, but I was puzzled. Now whenever I come across something that seems intuitive but I have never considered I call it a duck in a tree."
Ol_Pasta
"This realization happened to me this past year. We apparently have a family of wood ducks in one of the big trees in our yard. Our neighbor said she has seen a duck walking around on a branch. I made it 37 years without knowing some ducks can roost in trees. My wife caught a video of the mama leading like eight ducks into the field next to our house. We aren't even near water."
jwbourne
Artistic Timeline
Confused Eminem GIFGiphy"Pablo Picasso and Eminem were both alive at the same time."
leebon427
"I’d bet a lot of people think Picasso is a Renaissance artist."
editormatt
I admit it. I'm one of those people. Pablo and Marshall, in one lifetime.
New facts are fun.
The New World
Design Loop GIF by xponentialdesignGiphy"They were colonizing the Wild West at the same time as they were building skyscrapers in Manhattan. I always think of them taking place eighty to a hundred years apart. It's wild."
Emilayday
Oh the Power
"Nuclear power plants are just steam power plants that use nuclear reactions to heat the water. There's no fancy magic extracting energy directly from nuclear material. They just boil water and spin a turbine."
RenaKunisaki
"Most electrical generation is spinning a turbine. Photovoltaic solar power is pretty much the only exception, and it's not the only form of solar power. There's solar thermal power, which uses mirrors or lenses to concentrate the heat of the sun to make steam and turn a turbine."
Brawndo91
The Empire
"The Roman Empire fully fell less than 50 years before the discovery of the new world."
South-by-north
"The Romans also had copper wire, magnets, and battery acid. They could have invented electricity hundreds of years before it was actually discovered. But they didn't. The wire was used for jewelry, the magnets as lodestones, and the battery acid was used to clean the rust off of swords."
Kahzgul
"RIP Byzantine Empire. 1453 never forget."
crossbowman44
The Witness
"Owl‘s silent flight. I mean I always knew that but a while ago was the first time I actually witnessed it. Owl came flying towards me and landed only a few feet away and you couldn‘t hear anything. Crazy."
Zealousideal-You-324
"I saw a barn owl swoop down and catch a mouse while hiking at night, and the whole thing happened in complete silence. It gave me a deep sense of unease because it was literally like someone hit the mute button on life."
VulcanVisions
Bad Kermit
Kermit The Frog Meme GIF by IdentityGiphy"Poison dart frogs aren't poisonous in captivity."
"I own 5 of them and anytime I tell someone I own some I always get 'Do you ever lick them' or 'Can you go kill someone with them.' But yeah they get their poison from what they eat, and all I give them is fruit flies."
JMfury
Poison frogs?
That sounds like something Rose would have a story about on 'The Golden Girls.'
Romantic relationships are great. They are full of excitement, fun, and even some stress, though it's mostly good stress (yes, that exists).
However, not all romances are meant to last. Whether it's because you grew apart or you realized the person you were with wasn't who you thought they were, a relationship can end.
Sometimes, those relationships are something you can look back on fondly as you move forward. Other times, they are relationships you regret.
Redditors know a lot about the second type, and are ready to share their stories.
It all started when Redditor Ingenuiie asked:
"What are your dating regrets?"
You Must Matter
"Dont get hung up on someone who doesnt give a f*ck"
– Speedy-Thunder
"Never make someone a priority who only makes you an option."
"Someone said it first. Probably Abe Lincoln"
– snarfdarb
"Don’t set yourself on fire to keep them warm"
– Stalkz_YT
Just Chill
"Getting so caught up in the fun early stages of the relationship and planning activities for dates that I forgot to just relax and be myself, take it a week at a time and see how things went. Pretty sure it made me seem too pushy, so things didn’t end very well for me. Lesson learned: chill tf out lmao"
– Spectronautic1
"That's me. I still struggle with it now tbh. Although I'm trying to keep a lid on it and just be chill."
– layinwitme-
End It
"I regret not ending relationships I was unhappy in sooner (like years sooner)"
– Zestyclose-Chef5215
"I'm in the middle of this right now. I knew 3 years ago but I convinced myself that maybe I was wrong and that things would change. We're still together, and I'll always love her, but I'm not happy, and I don't think I will be until the relationship ends. I can't let this go on much longer. Cheers."
– moniqer
This Is Me
"That I hid some of my hobbies and interests because I was scared they looked dorky."
"As soon as I stopped hiding it I met my partner."
"(Model railways ftw)."
– Singingmute
"Never be ashamed of your hobbies. It may make you look like a nerd or a dork but you don't need the kind of people who would make fun of them."
– aris_ada
"My SO loves the fact that I'm into model trains (her words, not mine.)"
"She laid it out for me when we first started dating: I'm handy around the house - I can tackle carpentry, electrical work, and have general knowledge about how to troubleshoot/fix things."
"It's a combo of artistry, technology, and history/research so there are always things to learn. It's a generally wholesome hobby that also promotes patience and working towards something over a long period of time instead of rewarding instant gratification."
"It's a fun hobby that I balance with other interests that we do together (outdoorsy stuff, board games, being history nerds.) We love each other for all of who we are, not just parts of who we are, and we wouldn't want the other person to change."
– dualsusser
Sometimes, Alone Is Better
"I should not have settled for someone I wasn't super compatible with just because I was lonely"
– Feline_is_kat
"This happened to me when I moved to a new city."
"It was great at first because I instantly had fairly large friend group and such but I realized years later just how much I had actually passed up on and compromised on."
"Still not sure I recognize myself anymore."
– nelsonalgrencametome
Love That Lets Go
"Always being the last to let go, and never letting go easy."
"Edit- the never letting go easy is the part I wish I could change."
– forex_1911
"Sometimes it’s just who you are as a person. There’s nothing wrong with that. We all have our personality traits that make life easier/harder for certain scenarios."
– ChlamydiaDonations4U
"That’s the best explanation for me because I certainly can’t seem to learn from previous mistakes no matter how many times I make them."
"To learn from them would mean to stop trying to date entirely"
– TuesdayNightMassacre
Take A Chance
"Not taking chances with various girls/ women throughout my life when I had the opportunities to."
– apG_13
"Honestly, this is why I (female) started asking men out. I was doing inventory in the supply closet when I heard my crush and several of his friends talking about me and wondering who I was dating. Because apparently I had to already be dating someone. One of the guys asked my crush if he'd ask me out, the guy laughed and said he didn't have a snowball's chance in hell, so he'd skip the humiliation. The other dudes agreed with him."
"And... I was just sitting there on the other side of the wall with my clipboard and a box of junk going... WTF?!? I started paying a little more attention and realized I got talked about a lot. It was infuriating. How could my dating life be utterly non-existent while guys were having those sorts of conversation about me?"
"So... A couple months later, I walked up to my crush on new year's eve at midnight, kissed him, and told him we should go out. I know I went a bit too far in the other direction from passive behavior, but it worked. He wasn't really coherent for the next half hour, just smiling and staring at me, but we were officially dating the next week."
"Being proactive was generally a very positive thing for me. Men were almost always absolutely thrilled to be asked out, picked up, and taken on a date..."
– LostDogBoulderUtah
"YES. This is exactly it. I wish all women knew this. I do the exact same thing and it works like a charm, men love being hit on and asked out! Women, they LOVE it do not be afraid. My boyfriend raves about how I flirted with him so obviously and kind of teased him and then asked him out lol. And I have done exactly that in probably 75% of the relationship I have had. Men like when you pick them and have a lot of confidence and just make it really fun for them to be hit on, and you don't have to be self-conscious about it bc believe me they love it. They hardly ever have this happen to them, usually they have to do the work. And it also just sets a really good tone for the relationship because you're going to ask for the things you want, overall."
– Subject-Hedgehog6278
Romantic Intelligence
"That I didn’t try to date more in my early 20s. Now I’m in my mid 30s with a combined relationship experience of a little over a year."
"I basically have the romantic intelligence of a 16-year-old."
– ThrowawayOfALoserr
"Looking at this thread, I'm seeing the regrets swing from "I dated even though I didn't like the person/people and they messed me up for future dates." to "I didn't date enough and now I'm not experienced enough for future dates.""
"I'm starting to think this "romantic intelligence" thing isn't about experience so much as self-love and self-confidence which can be found with or without romantic relationships. Plus a little bit of finding the right person."
– 11Buckwheat11
Rip Off The Band-Aid
"Oh damn my first relationship was this gradual shift from we're in a relationship to we're kinda in a relationship but figuring things out but she still wanted all the things I was doing for her, to we're definitely not in a relationship but still talking regularly, it was months."
"Had I just stepped up and said "okay, this is either a yes or a no, there's no middle ground here, if we're a couple we're a couple but if we aren't, I can't have you in my life right now", it would have spared me QUITE a bit of pain."
– 1CEninja
Location, Location, Location
"So far my biggest regret was moving half way across the country with someone and when I was struggling to adjust to that location they refused to move a few hours for me to a different location. That really hurt. Felt like I gave up so much for them and it turns out they wouldn't do the same for me. I'll never move for love again."
– Barkingcat29
Keep Some Eggs
"Despite many warnings from people trying to help me, I put all my eggs in the same basket. Married young and devoted myself to someone thinking that devotion would always be reciprocated, but apparently people change even if you don't. Always be prepared for the other shoe to drop, I guess is my advice. Kinda cynical, I know, but recent experiences taught me a lesson I never wanted to learn."
– Silk_Song_
Ouch! That's a lot of regret. But I hold out hope.
Just remember, you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince (or princess)!
People Explain Which Things They Thought Everyone Was Exaggerating About Until They Experienced Them
Life lessons are forged in experience.
So many of us love to think we know what another person is feeling, and their reactions are just emotional.
Or what they're saying about what they're going through feels a bit over the top.
So many people are just dramatic, right?
Wrong.
Until we walk in those shoes, we'll never know.
Redditor rentinghappiness wanted to hear about the things everyone really didn't know anything about until it happened to them, so they asked:
"What is something you used to think people were over-exaggerating about until you experienced it yourself?"
We never really know anything about anything until we try it for ourselves.
Mouth Issues
Dentist GIFGiphy"Dentist chiming in… tooth pain. I knew academically how painful they could be until it happened to me."
juneburger
"You know the pain is serious when you start looking forward to the inevitable root canal."
HailMari248
Wonders of Nature
"Giant sequoia trees. When I finally saw them in person, they looked fake. I could not comprehend a tree of that size."
schaefer001
"And we may have lost 15-20% of the remaining trees during some big fires in 2020 and 2021. A 2011 estimate puts it that there were only 80,000 remainings. They truly are wondrous organisms that I feel like everyone should have the chance to experience if they can."
"I'm a big believer in doing everything we can to protect and preserve these silent giants. It's really sad that so many were cut down by loggers when the wood is such poor quality for human purposes, to begin with. Such an utter and sad waste."
this_is_poorly_done
Just Me
"Loneliness."
Fried__SoapI
"I'm with you. Put all my cards into a girl who went suddenly cold and dark on me. Now I'm alone at rock bottom figuring out my next moves. You know, the smartest people in the world and also the happiest people in the world can be the loneliest?"
"I was only recently informed it's okay to talk to myself and hype myself. Enjoy my own company. I'm absolutely going to learn to do that. I'm thinking of painting, walking, and weekend trips out on a bus. Would be nice if you could have joined me even if we sat in silence."
Roofdragon
The Years Gone By...
"The physical pain of getting older. Damn."
marklikeadawg
"The emotional pain too. I get so nostalgic and teary over the past and how much has changed. It's a weird grieving process over losing your youth and the way things were."
heethersmeether
"On my 35th birthday, my wife woke me up with a cupcake and a candle, sang me 'Happy Birthday' and then congratulated me on being '15 from 50'... that really hit me hard. The other day I turned 45 and she said '5 from 50' and that hit me so hard, I just wanted to stay in bed all day. I still feel like an irresponsible teen but I'm pushing 50. Insane."
Opa_Kalaka
It's Hazy
Confused Always Sunny GIF by It's Always Sunny in PhiladelphiaGiphy"Brain fog. I had an alcohol withdrawal seizure in March. My short-term memory and sense of time are absolutely sh*t right now. On the plus side, I haven't had a drink in over 90 days and I don't want one."
Sideshow_Bob_Ross
Oh the wonders of the brain.
What a mess.
Scorched
Menopause Hot Flashes GIF by Kino LorberGiphy"Hot Flashes. I didn’t think they were this bad. I’m a 31-year-old man who took Wellbutrin for the past month and hot flashes are a side effect."
"I thought you just thought you were hot. No motherf**ker you are. You’re super hot legitimately, and you have to do something about it or you’ll go insane. It’s not in your head. It’s your brain raising your temps until you can’t focus on anything else."
_PswayZ_
Everlasting
"Chronic illness, there is absolutely no way you can truly understand the impact unless you experience it."
Disastrous-Phase-979
"Just that idea of always being sick and you will NEVER not be sick again."
"AND you're expected to participate in society just the same as everyone else. It's deeply f**ked up."
Farisr9k
"I like the part where I've been in pain for 25 years so I can kind of still function even when it's really bad."
"And then I try to get an ambulance guy or an admin assistant in a hospital to believe that I'm having an emergency and they're like 'You seem fine, take some Tylenol and go home' until I finally get a blood test, and then the doctor goes 'Holy crap, you're about to die, why didn't you come to the ER sooner.'"
"Like, listen up MF, I had to take a go**amn Uber to get here and then argue with reception for an hour."
BlahBlahILoveToast
Stoned
"How much a kidney stone hurts."
SpiritusSanctu
"Most people expect it to hurt the most when passing a stone through the urethra. Nothing prepared me for the pain as it passed through my kidney/ureter."
"One second I would be fine, carrying on conversations, prancing around nimbly-nimbly. The next second I would be keeled over, crying in agony, losing my lunch due to the sudden onset of crippling pain. 0/10 ... Would not recommend it."
King_of_Lunch223
Close Your Eyes
"Insomnia."
Successful_Fall7801
"Oh, what I would give to not have insomnia! I go through periods of sleeping more or less normal, and then for seemingly no reason, I’ll have weeks on end where a good night of sleep is IMPOSSIBLE. I’ll get 2-4 hours of sleep despite pills, tea, baths, white noise, meditation - everything."
"I’ll spend my days so deeply, utterly exhausted that I can barely think, and my whole body feels heavy, lifeless. It’s hard to feel any kind of emotion, let alone happiness or contentedness. Just existing as a human-shaped puddle until the time when I can go to bed and hope to god that tonight will be different for some unknown reason."
"Insomnia is a real bi*ch. It will tank your mental health and send you spiraling really fast."
thesmallshadows
Beep
Meme Reaction GIF by TravisGiphy"Tinnitus. It’s torture."
DissidentBliss
"I don't mind it much 'cause I've had it since I was born. That means I don't know what proper silence is."
77x5ghost
"Me too, they thought I had hearing issues when I was young because I couldn’t really hear some of the beeps well because they matched the pitch of the ringing."
ehter13
Don't judge another until you lace up their shoes and walk a mile in them!
Do you have anything else to share? Let us know in the comments.
Stuffies, plushies, stuffed animals, or plush toys; whatever you might call them, we likely all can remember a fluffy friend we had in our childhood.
But some adults might have carried their childhood friend into adulthood, or even made others along the way, and they might even still go to sleep with them at night, too.
Redditor Old-Horse1185 asked:
"34 percent of adults sleep with a stuffed animal or other sentimental objects."
"Are you one of these people? What do you sleep with?"
The Twin Bond
"My twin sister died when I was 18. Ten years later, I still sleep with her unicorn pillow pet, she gets a nice spot on the bed, and I'd never be with someone who made me feel bad about having it. Only my girlfriend is trusted enough to give pillow pet a bath."
- insomniacinsanity
"My twin brother died when we were seven, and I used to have a specific stuffie that was given to him by an American lady who worked in the hospital he was in, but it got damaged in a house move when I was a teenager and was unsalvageable."
"It was a limited-run stuffie that you could only get in a specific American store in the 90s, so it was basically irreplaceable. My husband, 10+ years later and without letting on, tracked one down and paid a silly amount of money to have it shipped to the UK and gave it to me for Christmas a couple of years ago."
"I sleep with it every d**n night. I'm mid-30s, and I'll never stop."
- beesandsids
Keeping Them Close
"My partner passed away a few weeks ago, and I now cuddle his shirts that still have his scent. When my son spends the night with his grandparents, I also cuddle w his blanket or the pillow he sleeps on."
- anonmomanonnin
Cuddles and Fidgets
"My grandma made me a pillow when I was born. She sewed the pillow together and the pillow case, which had kittens all over it."
"I’m 33 years now she passed when I was 31, and I sleep with the same pillow in my arms every night."
"The pillow case is worn to bits because I guess I use it as a fidget thing I rub in between my fingers. Yes, I’m weird."
- Valuable_Panda_4228
From the Beyond
"I bought my wife a big stuffed seal for our first Valentine's Day. This seal has a slight green tint to it, so we named him Sealo Green. She had Sealo for a couple of years before she passed away."
"I hug Seal-o every night and pray to my wife, tell her about my day, things coming up, etc. I'll start using her perfume on Sealo soon, so I can smell her while I pray to her. My heart can't take it right now."
- Cubbycupcake-Uther
A Gift from Grandma
"I am one. My grandma gave all the grandkids a cat plush. A cat food brand had a promotion, if you bought enough cat food you'd get a free plushie. With 14 grandkids, a lot of food was bought to get there. Her cats didn't complain though, lol (laughing out loud)."
"I still sleep with it, it's a feeling of comfort, safety, and home."
- DavyJonesLocker2
An Evolving Friendship
"Stuffed dog I've had since my mom was squeezing him while giving birth to me. That dog has seen some s**t."
"He's a 'Sad Sam,' and his eyes used to break my heart when I was a kid, so I buried him under other stuffed animals or made him face the wall so I wouldn't have to look at him."
"Then I felt really guilty because I didn't want him to feel punished when all he wanted was to be loved. So I've been sleeping with him for almost 40 years now."
"I recently bought an original one off eBay to see the comparison and man, I have loved the daylights out of that dog!"
- dumdadumdumAHHH
A Special Bond
"I now sleep with my girlfriend's stuffed bunny she has had since birth. He’s my best friend now! I love you, Bootstin!!"
- silversauce
"Aww, that's awesome. My partner is the only person I've ever been with who didn't make me feel like crap for still having my blanket. When I travel, I leave it with them, and I think they probably cuddle up with it as much as I do after a rough day."
- the_Ozz
Keeping a Partner Close
"Sometimes when I take a nap and my wife doesn't, I'll take her pillow to sleep with because I like the smell."
"It smells like baby powder, vanilla, and her."
- TrailerParkPrepper
Very Considerate
"Huge jellycat bears. I don’t even wanna, but I’m just afraid I’ll hurt their feelings if I don’t."
- CommonAd9606
"As a kid, I routinely slept with a zillion stuffed animals on the bed because I didn’t want any of them to feel left out."
- PumaGranite
"As a kid? I'm 26 and still have to hug them all as I go to sleep or they'll feel left out!"
- Scymber
Lower Back Pain
"I sleep with a body pillow (plain cover). Doctor recommended it a few years ago to help with my lower back pain and it really does help."
- HappyTimeHollis
"I sleep with a body pillow but it's an alligator. My grandparents gave it to me when I was 11 years old. It has a huge open mouth you can put your arm through or use to prop your phone. Had it 24 years. Love it to death."
- smoretank
Full Body Support
"Squishmallows. I have sciatica and they're great for when I go to bed. I put one between my knees at night (side sleeper) and I snuggle up with one."
- Raging_Utahn
Happy Kitty, Sleepy Kitty
"I'm not one to sleep with plushies, but my cat likes to snuggle up to me and sleep with his fluffy little head on my shoulder."
- imaybeacatIRL
"Cats have to count. My previous cat actually slept as the little spoon, snuggled in my arms."
- disapprovingfox
The Long-Distance Relationship
"I am a guy, I recently got to sleep with a stuffed animal for a week, I won't go into the details as to why or how, just know that I lovvveeeed it. I would get called a weirdo if I confess to this to the world, so I have kept this to myself and my bestie only."
"The stuffed animal was a large teddy bear, since then it has been taken away and now it is placed in the living room, my bedroom has one small stuffed toy that I sleep with, it's not super large and not as comfortable as the teddy but it works."
"It makes me feel good and less alone, the closest person in the world to me is 700km away, what I'm about to say is weird but hugging the teddy and pretending it's her makes me calm and makes me want to sleep."
- uninformed-but-smart
Build a Friend... with IKEA
"Ikea Hippo, Ikea Elephant. The Ikea bigs are the superior sleep companion. I also have the shark, but he is not right for my shoulder when cuddling so he guards."
- pm-me-neckbeards
"I also keep my Ikea shark on guard at night! The Ikea octopus is the guard when I sleep at my boyfriend’s house."
- jeff-buckleys-teeth
A Comfort Become Real
"When I was a toddler, I got a stuffed animal as a present from my uncle. It was a light brown rabbit with button eyes and ears with rainbow stripes on the inside. I'm unsure of when I got it, but I was either one to two years old or four years old."
"I don't know how or why, but it had a distinct scent, not particularly noticeable unless you shoved your face in its fur, like I did, haha. As I grew up, I needed to have this rabbit with me or I would not be able to sleep. I remember this one time when I couldn't find it in time for bed, and I was so distressed trying to fall asleep that I started hallucinating."
"Over time she lost an eye, her ears became frayed, her fur fell out in patches, and she looks like a well-loved creature (because she is) or hot garbage, depending on who you ask."
" Even in my rebellious teen years, I couldn't pretend to dislike her because the scent and texture of her fur gave me a feeling of comfort and safety, even when it felt like everyone was against me."
"I live by myself now at age 34 and you better believe I still keep her in my bed. The scent is gone but sometimes I can trick my brain into thinking it's still there, and when I touch the texture of her fur, I will still get a wave of comfort and reassurance the same way I did as a child."
"It's amazing not only how humans will bond with anything, but also the effect these things will have on a person."
"This got sappy, my apologies."
"PS: Her name is Ninni."
- Mwuuh
"'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.'"
"I'm reminded of this quote from 'The Velveteen Rabbit.'"
- tinycole2971
While everyone might feel a little silly about their sleeping arrangements, most of those who still sleep with a cuddly friend have spent a great deal of their life with their companion already.
From sentimental reasons to physical needs, everyone needs comforted from time to time, and there's nothing quite like the unconditional love of a favorite stuffie friend.