New Fathers Reveal The Stupidest Things They Did While Their Wife Was Pregnant[rebelmouse-image 18353047 is_animated_gif=
Most dads have experienced that moment when they have done something wrong when their wife was pregnant. These dads may not have known that their actions would set off their pregnant wife, but some of them should have thought a little harder about their decisions.
Fathers, what are some dumb things you have done while your wife was pregnant?
Future dads, take note!
Sometimes the jokes land in the wrong place[rebelmouse-image 18347715 is_animated_gif=
I think I was about 8 months pregnant and after many atemps at rolling over in bed I finally managed it.
My husband laughs to himself and announces "thar she rolls."
That's just rude![rebelmouse-image 18353048 is_animated_gif=
Apparently eating fried chicken while your wife is giving birth is frowned upon...I hadn't eaten in like 24 hours, and I am not squeamish. Doctor was not impressed, so I threw it out promptly. Baby is born, all checks done, and the wife is doing good....she turns to me and says, you should go get some more chicken, I know you are still hungry. One of the many reasons I love that woman.
Laughing but crying[rebelmouse-image 18353049 is_animated_gif=
I asked my husband to get me some cocoa butter for my stretch marks.
An hour later he calls me and says, "I've looked in the candy section AND the dairy section. I cannot find the cocoa butter!" He sounded frustrated and tired, but I just did this ugly laugh cry thing.
I explained to him, between sons of laughter, that it was a LOTION. I was laughing because it was so funny, and crying because my stomach was itching like crazy and I needed relief.
False alarm![rebelmouse-image 18353050 is_animated_gif=
My dad had just got a new car when my mum was due to have me and he turned on the heated seats while she was sitting in the passenger seat. She thought her water had broke.
Wrong question[rebelmouse-image 18353052 is_animated_gif=
When my parents arrived at the hospital to give birth to me, the first thing my dad asked the nurse was "where's the cafeteria?"
How is that even considered a good idea?[rebelmouse-image 18353053 is_animated_gif=
I was working out like crazy and dropped to 159lbs. My 8 month pregnant wife had just weighed in at 160lbs. I said "hey, you weigh more than me!"
Go directly to doghouse. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200..
It's always your fault[rebelmouse-image 18353054 is_animated_gif=
When my wife was pregnant with our first kid, she instructed me not to indulge her crazy needs. She warned me that she might have some weird cravings, but I was not to submit.
Couple of weeks into pregnancy, my wife told me she wants some olives. She could really have some olives. Not thinking twice, I grabbed a full jar (16ish oz) of olives and gave it to her. We continued merrily watching some movie and life was simple. About an hour later, my movie watching experience is being promptly ruined by my lovely wife projectile vomit what seemed to be a bucket load of half ingested olives across our bedroom. Of course, it was all my fault for letting her do that to herself.
excuse me!?[rebelmouse-image 18353057 is_animated_gif=
My water broke at about 3am but I'm not one to freak out or rush so I let my husband sleep until 6am before I woke him up and told him we needed to get ready to go to the hospital . It was our first and it was 10 days early so we were not expecting it. His exact words were "Are you serious? Okay, I know this is bad timing, but can you cut my hair first?"
Sometimes things change...[rebelmouse-image 18353058 is_animated_gif=
My wife loves fried green beans pregnant or not. But when she was pregnant with our second child I fried 2 whole bags of them as our entire dinner. Later in the evening, we were taking a shower together and she proceeded to throw up fried green beans all over me...twice. I'm still gunshy around her in the shower.
Funny, but maybe a little harsh on her[rebelmouse-image 18353059 is_animated_gif=
My dad switched to buying Prego pasta sauce when my mom was pregnant and thought it was hilarious
When you go out on the wrong night[rebelmouse-image 18353060 is_animated_gif=
Went out to a happy hour with buddies on a random Tuesday night(Wife approved btw). The hour turned into several hours. Get home around 12:30, wife wakes me up at 4:30 saying her water broke. I actually didn't believe her, as her due date was a good 2-3 weeks out. I stared at the wet spot in the bed for quite a bit not wanting to believe what was happening. What a hangover in the hospital I felt like absolute shit and everyone could tell. The bright lights and noise were helping a lot. One of the nurses even commented on how excited I looked(I was a complete zombie). That all changed once my daughter was born. What a surreal feeling that was. I cried really hard, it was weird. I had no inclination at all that was going to happen. What a roller coaster of feelings that day had in store for me.
A baby and a pizza[rebelmouse-image 18353061 is_animated_gif=
When my mother was giving birth to me my father ordered a pizza. And after I was born my mom was laying in the bed exhausted and she looks at my dad who with a full mouth asks her if she'd like a slice. She didn't.
You will never live that down[rebelmouse-image 18353062 is_animated_gif=
True story.... I had worked 12 hour shifts for three days in a row. Night shift none the less.
I get home from work at 6:30 in the morning, take the daughter to school. Come home lie down in bed, my wife turns to me and says..."I think today might be the day" I go to sleep for maybe ten to twenty minutes. She says OMG my water broke. I tell her to get out of the bed so it isn't like totally wet.
On the way to the hospital, remember I had just worked three twelve hour shifts. I turn to my wife and say "Do you mind if I stop at McDonalds?"
Suffice it to say I got a Sausage Egg and Cheese McMuffin.
But, I still hear about it regularly!
Was he the pregnant one though?[rebelmouse-image 18353063 is_animated_gif=
When my mom was pregnant with me, her water broke at around 2 AM. She woke up my dad saying he had to take her to the hospital. He then groaned, rolled out of bed, they went downstairs, and he began making himself a sandwich saying "the baby isnt popping out for another 12 or so hours, relax". I was the 3rd child, so I guess he had a good idea about how long these things take.
Really bad timing dad[rebelmouse-image 18345517 is_animated_gif=
Don't make any plans in the 3rd trimester.
Friend of mine flew out to Switzerland to visit us and go snowboarding. Babies arrived the same day he did. Had to cancel the trip. I felt pretty bad, but he understood/had no choice.
But this is tame compared to the many friends I have that traveled abroad and missed the birth of their kids because they came early.
Not appropriate at all![rebelmouse-image 18353064 is_animated_gif=
It was right after she gave birth, not while she was pregnant. She was complaining about the boy feeding non-stop, and mentioned that he made her feel like a cow. That was when I learned 'Mooooooo' was not an appropriate response to that situation.
What's more important than your child's birth?[rebelmouse-image 18353065 is_animated_gif=
My dad is a HAM. Not amateur, but all engrossing, passion of his life, needs-nothing-else like. On the day I was born he sent my mom alone to the hospital because he was talking to americans on the radio for the first time. (we were living in Russia, and this was all on a homemade antenna in the 90's). So yeah, thanks dad.
The nerves must really make dads hungry[rebelmouse-image 18353066 is_animated_gif=
I was in hour 15 or 16 of a failed induction and they were talking about possibly needing a c-section. My husband asks the OB if he has time to grab sushi from ghe cafeteria.
Creative, but maybe not the right place and time[rebelmouse-image 18353067 is_animated_gif=
I introduced the nursing staff to the terms "crotch fruit" and "sex trophy."
I would think, working in a delivery ward they would have heard those terms before but noooooooooooooooo. Apparently I had uttered the most offensive thing they had ever heard while my wife was giving birth.
Bottom line, be careful what you say[rebelmouse-image 18353068 is_animated_gif=
My wife thought she was in labor, I didn't because she had next to no pain. Drive an hour to the hospital go through triage the whole thing. Not labor. 3am the next day, repeat. Confirmed to be labor and the first real contraction hits. I bet you felt that didn't you? Yeah... I got punched.
Everyone has friends who you become less and less close to with each passing year.
This isn't always by choice, though, but simply by circumstance, when your lives both take different directions.
In some cases, however, we do find ourselves making a very conscious decision to stop spending time with certain friends.
Owing to the fact that these people might not be our friends after all.
In certain cases, the communication ends as the result of one specific moment.
Redditor D1Tytos was curious to hear the triggering moment when people decided to end their friendships, leading them to ask:
"What's the moment that made you realize your so called 'friends' were really just d*cks?"
Lack of Compassion
"When I got cancer and they never checked on me."- justagirlx19
Being Taken Advantage Of
"Worked with and rented a large house with my friend group after high school."
"Dumb and inexperienced with life, I didn’t know they were lying to me about bills and making me pay more/whatever they felt like until a family member asked about it."
"Eventually they all looked at moving into a new place without telling me."
"I felt guilty and confessed they would basically steal my money to shop with and planned on moving out while I was visiting family so I came back to an empty place and responsible for everything."- dylandbloom
"I found myself getting irritated whenever they called/hit me up."
"Because every time they'd only ask for something , never just to talk to hang out."- ybbetter_ratio
Happy Birthday Indeed...
"The last time I tried throwing a birthday party for myself."
"It always seemed like the ratio of people who said they'd come to people who actually showed was...lacking."
"But my final attempt."
"I had 20+ people say they'd show."
"Exactly one actually came."
"I've never had a birthday party since."
"But I'm still good friends with the one guy who showed."- Lachwen
"They asked to not have one of the people in our group over."
"They didn't want to tell him there was no game, they just wanted him to knock and pretend no one was there."
"I wasn't very cool with this but they didn't want to be 'confrontational' with said person."
"Before the next week rolled around they were saying 'there wasn't going to be anything going on' that Saturday."
"I knew they were full of sh*t, but went by to confirm they were all there that Saturday, and sure enough they all were."
"Just dropped them like a sack of potatoes and never spoke to them again, no reason to."- MickCollins
"Had 3 friends."
"2 I liked and 1 I didn't really like at all."
"Turns out they had a secret group chat where they just called me slurs and talked about me behind my back."
"The guy I didn't like sent me screenshots of this and me and him have been friends 3 years now."- c_a_t2·
"When I stopped drinking and realized that’s all we had holding our friendship together."- BillieBoJangers·
"I remember I was severely depressed and I called someone I thought was my friend."
"When he realized I wanted to talk about real sh*t he made up an excuse to hang up."
"After that he kept ignoring my calls."
"What's crazy is I was there for that dude when his wife left him for another guy."
"There were times where I wanted to escape his depressing stories, but sat there and listened because he was my friend."- horsetoothjack@ss119
"Couples retreat of 3 pairs, other 2 girlfriends flaked last minute, leaving mine."
"They still came, then had the nerve to tell mine the trip would’ve been better without her right to her face when I was out surfing."
"This was never established as a guys trip at any point."
"She fed them, organized the trip as a whole, etc."
"Guy lies about his well-being being bad cus he loves how worried someone reacts."
"I called him out on it when he lied to someone else and he literally said 'I enjoy winding people up, I love how they react when I say x'."
"That's gross to me."- PastaNotFound
Ending a friendship is never pleasant.
But time heals everything, and over the course of a couple months, it might become evidently clear how much better off your life is without certain people in it.
We all have songs that we can't get out of our heads, resulting in our randomly humming them while walking down the street.
Among the most infectious songs are theme songs to TV shows.
Be it from tuning in every week to catch up with Friends who will always" be there for [us]", or being "stuck in the middle" of a Grace And Frankie binge, we often find ourselves humming the theme songs of our favorite shows more often than we find ourselves quoting the best lines.
Even if it means humming an infectious melody to a wordless piece of music (Will & Grace or Seinfeld anyone?)
Redditor LinksOtherUncle was curious to hear what people considered the all time greatest theme song to a TV show, leading them to ask:
"What is the greatest TV Show theme song of all-time?"
"Duck Tales, of course."- Beautiful-Stranger20
"Believe It Or Not It's Just Me!"
"Greatest American Hero!"- GayHole
"The Truth Is Out There"...
"X Files"- CheliBeanBeardx files GIF by The X-FilesGiphy
"Bum Bum BUM bum...bum bum BUM BUM bum bum bum..."
"Sanford and Son"- jkulpa
The Original MCU
"90s X-Men."- Ourobius
"Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale..."
"Gilligan's Island"- Cantbetoobad1953Bored Gilligans Island GIF by TV Land ClassicGiphy
"It's time to play the music, it's time to light the lights..."
"The Muppet Show theme song!"- Poorkiddonegood8541
"A World Of Criminals Who Operate Above The Law"
"Knight Rider!"- BladeBronson
"Heroes in a half-shell, TURTLE POWER!"
"The original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon theme."- Petulant_Platypusninja turtles GIF by Teenage Mutant Ninja TurtlesGiphy
"You want to go where everybody knows your name."
The only thing more comforting than turning on our TVs to revisit a familiar town with familiar characters, is the comforting familiar music which greets us on our return.
Who hasn't had a moment when they learned what they thought was a revelatory piece of information, ran to share it with their friends, and were then greeted by a barrage of stone faces?
Owing to the fact that what we only just learned a few minutes ago, was apparently common knowledge.
These include your favorite movie star was in fact the offspring of another movie star, what gelatin is actually made of, or little tricks and strategies which make certain experiences so much more pleasurable.
For no particular reason, some people learn these things far later than just about everyone else.
Redditor Big_Piccolo_8369 was curious to learn which bits of common knowledge people were late to the party in knowing, leading them to ask:
"What is common knowledge that you found out way too late?"
"Always eat before shopping at Costco."- mtl_jim
Sometimes Silence Is Golden
"Just because I hold an opinion on something doesn't mean that I need to share it."
"I spent WAY too much of my early adulthood inserting my viewpoint into discussions that I wasn't really a part of."- xjuggernaughtx
How To Hold People Accountable
"Always get it in writing"- GKnivestake notes GIFGiphy
How To Keep Friendships Strong
"Simply asking 'how are you' once in awhile is all it takes to not fall apart from old friends."- a_burdie_from_hell
Know Your Worth
"Hard work isn’t always the answer."
"When I worked a minimum wage job, I would work hard and not take breaks, so a great job, and always finish early."
"I just then got told to pick up the slack for the employees who spent their time goofing off."
"Never got a promotion, raise, or even a 'hey, good job'."- Disco-Onion
Think Twice Before Lending Money
"That when people ask to borrow money especially if it's a friend or family just expect to never see it again."- Different-Chest-5716Loan Borrow GIFGiphy
Being well-educated in one area doesn't mean that a person can't be a total idiot in other areas."- Red-belliedOrator
Never Make Decisions When Angry
"'Every action made in anger ends in sorrow'."
"An attorney, when I was 24."- yours121110
"Don't make permanent decisions based on temporary feelings."- YoschnitzelAngry Inside Out GIF by Disney PixarGiphy
The Importance Of Sleep
"Going too long without sleep can impair your ability to drive the same way as drinking too much alcohol."- SuvenPan
We're all bound to be looked down upon every now and then for just learning something everyone else already knows.
Though always remember, the wisest ones are those who never want to stop learning.
I'm a simple person when it comes to video games.
I prefer to go with nostalgia.
All of these fancy deals put me on sensory overload.
But my goodness the technology really has come a long way.
And there are actual storylines and drama.
Good for y'all gamers.
Redditor TolisKoutrowanted everyone to list their thoughts on the greatest of the great.
"What video game do you consider a masterpiece?"
I love you Ms. Pac-Man. Always and forever.
It's a Ridevideo game physics jet GIFGiphy
"Roller Coaster Tycoon 2."
"Loved RCT2. The canned child laughing sound and the chain lifts noise are permanently burned into my brain."
my whole childhood...
"Man I miss Valve... Their games were designed in a way many developers could only dream of, they were revolutionary in almost everything they laid their hands on."
"Yeah that’s my whole childhood, still some of the best games… and actually playing HL- alyx for my very first VR experience was nuts. Loved it."
"They made a new game based in the Portal universe. It’s really short but it’s free and funny."
Better than Perfect
For real. The first one was absolutely perfect and then they somehow managed to make the second one even better."
"Portal 1's only fault is that it's very short. I just replayed it a decade since I last touched it and I cleared it in under 2 hours. Portal 2 had so much more room to add more mechanics, more puzzles, and more story. It's the perfect sequel."
"Half Life 2 was brilliant. After that I'd call out WoW Classic. It's hated now, but the first couple of years it was magic. It was a completely new experience exploring such a massive open world and nobody knew anything. So much fun on Ventrilo. Will remember forever. Championship manager in the early 90s. Maybe what I have played the most. I'll mention Fallout series, Witcher and Skyrim as well."
Simply the BestMovie Raise The Roof GIF by Star WarsGiphy
"Star Wars knights of the old Republic. KOTOR. Surprised it hasn’t been said."
"Absolutely! I played it as a kid and it practically taught me life lessons. KOTOR 2 is a little darker but quite good also."
How can you even tell any of the Star Wars games apart?
FAVE!!Episode 8 Mario GIF by Paramount+Giphy
"Super Mario World. It’s perfect. I don’t think there’s a single thing about it that I would change."
"That game is awesome. That and Mario 64. But I love the soundtrack from Yoshi’s Island."
"Deus Ex the first one."
"At the time the open ended options and story presentation were both really impressive. You could really appreciate that the developer committed to that (e.g. you could physically destroy most locked doors). I think a lot of games stop short of doing that because they don’t want to allow brute force solutions in addition to more elegant ones."
"Journey. Not as long and vast as many games here but an artistic masterpiece in my books. It’ll age much better than most games too because of the simplicity."
"I absolutely love journey; the music mixed with the visual story telling is absolutely stunning. Also it has, imo, one of the most interesting multiplayer experiences of any game."
"It’s def one of my top three games, but Gris’ artwork and music are peak for me. Also if you really enjoyed the exploration of Journey, you’ll probably love Outer Wilds. Great game, it’ll leave you wishing you could forget it and play it all again."
"Chrono Trigger, if you know you know, and if you don't, go play it immediately."
"Definitely, I feel like some of the best RPGs came from the SNES and Sega era. Chrono Trigger, FF 6, Secret of Mana, super Mario RPG, Earthbound, shining force 2, Phantasy Star 4. Still some of my favorites that i try to revisit every year or so."
"Came here for Chrono. Time travel just makes for amazing stories, and I love how you can make the game different each play through."
i can see your...Master Chief Game GIF by HaloGiphy
"Halo 3. Incredible story and thrilling gameplay. Hilariously fun multiplayer. Fantastic community. Nostalgia."
Video games have surely come a long way from Atari.
What would you add to this list? Let us know in the comments below.