
Nerds Reveal The Most Embarrassing Nerdy Moment They've Ever Had
[rebelmouse-image 18352931 is_animated_gif=Nerd and geek culture has taken over. Just ask any of the Marvel movies in the theaters on any given week, or the Dungeons & Dragons Player's Handbook hitting the New York Times Best-Sellers list nearly 4 years after publication. While it's never been better than ever to let your geek flag fly, nerd and geeks now find themselves under a particular spotlight where we're forced to examine themselves a little but more and find those moments where we're a little but too nerdy. Reddit user, r/rp4187135, asked:
Nerds of reddit, what was the nerdiest moment of your life?
When xxxTowerxxx Met CharlieBob43...
[rebelmouse-image 18352932 is_animated_gif=I went to the international [Dota 2] championship in Seattle last year as a spectator and I got to meet some people that I play the game wth all the time. We called each other our online handles [instead] of using our actual names.
You Like Bombs? I Like Bombs!
[rebelmouse-image 18352933 is_animated_gif=Didn't realize I was a nerd about anything until I walked past a guy in the office watching a YouTube video that contained footage of a nuclear test explosion. "Aaah, Castle Bravo," I says. "One of my favorites."
The guy looks at me funny. I explain that Castle Bravo was the name of that particular explosion. "You recognize the explosion? And it's one of your favorites?" he replied.
Yep. I rattled off a bunch of other nuke test favorites--Storax Sedan, the gorgeous British Grapple X, Crossroads Baker, etc. I start describing the differences and nuances one can discern from watching hours of footage multiple times. I say something like, "The shape of each mushroom cloud is as distinct as a fingerprint," and notice that his eyes have glazed over, and that the room has gone silent. I look up at the room and see ten pairs of eyes staring at me like I've sprouted an extra head.
There's a long beat of silence, then a guy in the corner says, "You don't get to make fun of Star Trek ever again."
When's The Last Time We Saw Non-Virtual People
[rebelmouse-image 18352934 is_animated_gif=When my friend and I got invited to a party over the phone and had to lie about not being allowed to go out that night.
The actual reason we didn't go?? We were 25 Hours into a game of Civilizations V and desperately wanted to finish it up
But We Need To Finish Our Campaign
[rebelmouse-image 18352935 is_animated_gif=I was in the college dorms and lots of kids had gone home for a three-day weekend. Me and my friends decided we'd stay and play D&D. So we're playing, and laughing, and being all sorts of noisy.
My friend has his computer and we are simultaneously listening to funny .wav sounds on his computer (Remember "Thumper's World of Wavs"?) It was also pretty novel as it was to have a PC in a dorm at that time.
So we are being very noisy, laughing, rolling dice, and singing along at the top of our lungs to "It's log, it's log, it's big, it's heavy it's wood. It's log, it's log, it's better than bad, it's good!"
Then there's a knock at the door. It's the security guard at the door along with a campus police officer. They thought they were going to bust us underage drinking. Instead, they open the door and we're sitting around a table with the D&D screen up, and all our character sheets out, rolling dice, and one guy at the computer with a website so 90's it could have caused an epileptic seizure if we stared at it too long.
I thought they were going injure themselves they started laughing so hard.
Boffer Means "Foam Sword"
[rebelmouse-image 18352936 is_animated_gif=One girl I knew a few years back and I were fighting with foam swords over at a friends house because she had an interest in learning swordplay, but didn't like the idea of using real metal (fear of injury). Thus why I introduced her to what LARP was and told her I had taken some fencing lessons and could teach her a little with the boffers. She picked up on things real quick and we started going at it like mad, because I told her not to hold back and she said the same thing to me.
Apparently, our grunts made my friend think we were doing something else entirely and opened the door a bit before laughing. "Oh sh-t, man. I thought you two were having sex and I was so proud for a moment."
Yeah, we both blushed super hard.
No, You Don't Get It, They're Like LEGO Warriors
[rebelmouse-image 18352937 is_animated_gif=...the day i realized i knew more about Bionicle history than i knew about WWI and WWII.
My Ringtone Is The Strongest In The Universe
[rebelmouse-image 18352938 is_animated_gif=This might be easy. I was visiting my friend in LA, we were playing a DBZ fighting game, while we had his DBZ soundtrack playing in the background.
At some point, I look at my phone and notice multiple missed calls from his wife, as did he. We were both confused since neither of us had our phone silenced.
Then we realized, we just didn't notice the calls since both of us had DBZ ringtones.
He Had Thoughts On "The Last Jedi"
[rebelmouse-image 18352939 is_animated_gif=I was at a really big party and ignored a girl to talk to a guy about DnD and Star Wars.
The Baddest "Wild Draw 4" Ever
[rebelmouse-image 18352940 is_animated_gif=Once at my friend's apartment we had the cops called on us at 9:30pm on NEW YEARS EVE. We weren't even being that loud, but he lived down the hall from some old people who apparently did not gaf. Anyway, there was a knock at the door and as my friend opens it a Cop, looking at his note pad, sternly starts off with "Yeah, we got a noise complaint here for...." and then he looks up to survey the scene: 6 sober 23 year olds sitting around a coffee table with the TV on mute. And finishes his sentence with "Wait, are you guys playing UNO*?" We were like "Uh... Yeah?" and he looks around the apartment some more. And then he kind of just sighed and said "OK, well just try to keep it down a little. Have a good night. " and left. My friend was embarrassed about his neighbors, but we all thought it was hilarious. I'm sure that cop had some actual stuff to do that night, but I hope he got to tell his buddies about the "wild nerd party" he had to bust.
Do We Know Who This Is Yet?
[rebelmouse-image 18352942 is_animated_gif=This was the summer of 2004. I was actually at a summer camp for high school nerds at a college campus and we were allowed to use the computer lab during our free time.
We all had headphones on and it was silent until one guy says "The next Harry Potter is called 'The Half Blood Prince.'" And the room pretty much erupted into a nerdy frenzy of everyone theorizing who it could be.
No Joke, That's a 40 Hour Experience...
[rebelmouse-image 18352943 is_animated_gif=The nerdiest moment of my life was when my housemate had to come up with a safeword to stop me talking about Star Wars. A few months later he agreed to watch the OT with me...he swiftly joined the Dark Side.
The nerdiest day of my life was when I completed Final Fantasy VII in a single sitting, just to prove to the back of the instruction manual that I didn't need a memory card.
Get The Puppers Involved
[rebelmouse-image 18352944 is_animated_gif=I've taught my dog that when we say "we're going on a quest" he knows that means walkies.
MUSIC NERD
[rebelmouse-image 18352945 is_animated_gif=I once redid the Fresh Prince theme in my classics class as "The Fresh Princeps of Manliana" using parts of Cicero's oration against Cataline...
When You Need To Know Everything
[rebelmouse-image 18352947 is_animated_gif=I'm currently working on a watch-through of every Star Trek show in chronological (release) order before I watch Discovery.
Lan Parties. Bringing People Together.
[rebelmouse-image 18352948 is_animated_gif=I was dating a pretty girl in HS. She didn't quite comprehend how nerdy I was.
So I had planned this 16 person Halo 1 lan party. She wanted to hang out that Sunday. I told her I had plans and she should not come, as it will be 16 nerds in my house and I will not be paying attention to her. She shows up an hour early, all the while I went on a 72-0 soul caliber run against any takers as guest arrive. She is already getting mad. I proceed to play Halo for like 6 more hours as if she is not there. So she is real mad at the end and we broke up like a month later.
Cut to about 10 years later we reconnect and we are married and she has over 200 hours on stardew valley.
Waiting In Line For Video Games
[rebelmouse-image 18352949 is_animated_gif=Maybe a bit late, but I went to the midnight release of Wrath of the Lich King (a WoW [World of Warcraft] expansion). Whilst I was queued up outside, some yobs in a car drove past and shot fireworks at us, there was probably a good 30 people in the queue outside.
As they drove off, one of the people in the queue said "Don't you just hate mages and their Arcane Missiles" That's when I realised I actively enjoy being a nerd...
When You're Nerdier Than Sheldon
[rebelmouse-image 18352950 is_animated_gif=My family had a get together not too long ago. We were playing Apples to Apples while Big Bang Theory was playing in the background.
Now, my family (for some reason) LOVES BBT. I personally find the show kind of stupid, but I digress.
At one point in the show, Sheldon is carrying a Green Lantern... um... Lantern around with him. He recites the chant a couple of times.
Now, as a die hard fan of GL, I scream at the TV: "It's BLACKEST NIGHT! NOT DARKEST NIGHT!"
My whole family broke my balls over it for weeks, because I'm apparently nerdier than a fictional TV nerd.
Video Games In Real Life
[rebelmouse-image 18352951 is_animated_gif=It has to be the time I ran a game of live-action Star Wars Battlefront for thirty middle school kids and got /really/ into it.
I worked as a camp counselor at an academic summer camp (affectionately called "nerd camp") for the last three summers. For an after-class activity, I planned out a version of Battlefront for the kids to play in an outdoor 15 v. 15 battle. They each got about 1.5-2 feet of pool noodle as their "lightsaber" and had to capture command posts by tying knots in a string / untying the other team's knots (this gave them control of nearby respawn points I marked with sidewalk chalk). If you controlled more than half the command posts for three consecutive minutes, you win, and if you get touched by a pool noodle, you have to go back to a respawn point.
So, those are the mechanics of the game, but I got really invested in the presentation of it. I wore my full Jedi robes for it, and another counselor wore my graduation robes that we were able to pass for Sith robes. I hooked up a speaker system and blasted "Duel of Fates," "Jedi Temple March," "Clash of the Heroes," and a few other Star Wars soundtrack pieces for background music. I even had an "opening crawl" spiel setting up the background story for the battle (using the Battle of Ruusan from the EU), which I rehearsed and timed with the music of the opening crawl from the movies.
Whenever the game was getting too unbalanced, one of the counselors would join in... and I just so happened to do this while the camp photographer was nearby. So, there are about a hundred consecutive shots of me shouting, "Jedi Master /u/Aegon_Targaryen_VII has joined the battle!" and charging into crowds of middle-schoolers with pool noodles to lightsaber-duel them while I'm in full costume.
It was glorious.
TFW You Roll 3 20s In A Row
[rebelmouse-image 18352952 is_animated_gif=Tbh, when playing Dnd about a year ago in a dorm, we ended up getting a noise compliant from 3 floors up because someone got 3 nat 20s in a row.
You Only Win With 40 Elves
[rebelmouse-image 18347262 is_animated_gif=The first time a girl sent me a naked picture on snapchat I panicked and replied with a picture of the game of Magic the Gathering I was playing
Epic. We must know more. IE did you eventually score
I scored very highly in that game as I recall. I used my elf deck.
Salutations And Farewells
[rebelmouse-image 18352953 is_animated_gif=It was March 4, 2008. The day Gary Gygax died.
Gary invented Dungeons & Dragons, and since that game is such a big part of my life I decided I had to do something. I got my gaming buddy Duane, gathered our supplies and headed to the woods.
We found a small group of five trees and scrawled a shoddy pentagram in between. In the center we built a small pile of twigs and atop the ghetto altar we placed a bright orange D20. As we set the pile ablaze, we solemnly filled a Burger King promotional Lord of the Rings collectible goblet (it was the Frodo one) with Mt. Dew and drank until the tiny fire went out. We scooped up the melted plastic and it sits to this day on a shelf with all the dragon miniatures I own.
SPOILERS: It Was Awful
[rebelmouse-image 18352955 is_animated_gif=Moved to England to try to work on Star Wars Episode 1. Was not successful, but I came close. Went to Italy. Visited La Reggia Di Caserta to see Amidala's throne room (which is really just a connecting hallway in a government building).
Moved home. Camped, over night, in tents, in costume, to get SW: Episode 1 tickets. Got tickets. Camped, over night, in tents, in costume, to see SW:Episode 1 (because back then, the theater didn't have online ticket sales, or reserve seating). Interviewed in costume by several local news stations.
Got in, got an okay seat. Very excited to see the movie, had stayed successfully spoiler free the whole way. With about an hour to wait, I walked outside to enjoy the moment as my friends were there to save my seat for me. Guy walks up, asks for a light. I used to carry a zippo even though I didn't smoke. He goes, "Can you believe they kill Darth Maul in this movie?"
Slapped a guy I didn't know in the face for ruining a Star Wars plot point, knocking the cigarette I had just lit for him out of his mouth. We both looked at the cigarette for a second, when I stomped it out. "I guess I deserved that," he said, before walking away.
He did deserve that.
I still can't believe I once took Star Wars so seriously that I moved to another country and then smacked someone over it.
H/T: Reddit
- People Break Down The Most Embarrassing Moment Of Their Lives - George Takei ›
- People Divulge The Most Embarrassing Thing They've Ever Witnessed - George Takei ›
- "People Break Down Their Craziest 'Oh, You're Not Joking?' Experiences" - George Takei ›
- People Describe The Best Historical Examples Of 'F*** It, I'll Do It Myself' - George Takei ›
- 'This Person Is On Another Level Of Stupid' Experiences - George Takei ›
Until we're in a situation, we'll never really know how we'll react.
I have been in this scenario, though.
Sex matters. And people rarely want to admit how much.
But sex isn't a lifetime guarantee.
It fades, as does love.
It's important to speak about it.
It can be a fixable situation.
A relationship without sex may not be the end of the world, but it's definitely a sign that something is off.
Redditor Deviant55 wanted to talk about physical intimacy in relationships, so they asked:
"How important is sex to you in a relationship? Could you be with someone you love even if sex was off the table indefinitely?"
I learned how much sex matters in my last relationship.
Once I wasn't interested, it kind of killed everything.
Forever
"When my wife of 30+ years became too ill for sex to be even remotely interesting for her, I certainly did not end the relationship. I loved her and I took care of her until she died. No other course even occurred to me."
fvillion
Frustration
"When I met my wife we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. This lasted a few years. I was in my mid-twenties when we married. She developed a chronic medical issue. I’ve gone twenty years being sexually frustrated. There are stages and phases to this."
"What I came to realize is that I love my wife. Yes, sex is important in our relationship. But I would rather have her in my life with no sex than have sex without her."
"The thing is, I love her. She can’t help her situation. I can’t help it. One deals with it. Marriage is more than sex. It is building a life and memories, raising a family, and loving each other regardless of the challenges life throws our way. But sex is very important. It helps keep the closeness and the emotional bond. But it isn’t the only thing that does that."
QuietusNoctis
I Love Her
"It is complicated. I am in a near-sexless marriage. The wife needs antidepressants to function. And it kills her libido. So usually it is four to six times a year. My libido rages. And yeah, it sucks. I dream of more sex."
"But I love the chick. She loves me to the moon and back. I’m not willing to sacrifice her love so I can try dating again. Divorce rates these days? And I found a woman who more than tolerates me, she loves me. I’ll stay. And not to be crude but yeah I masturbate. A lot. She doesn’t begrudge me that. Occasionally she even encourages it."
"She went off her meds for a while. And man did we do it. But she was a mess. I need her healthy more than I need a shag. We travel together. We enjoy each other’s company. We actually like each other. I could claim that it is hell, but I choose to see all of the good I am blessed with."
painthawg_goose
Heartless
"Quite important. But I think it depends on where you are in the relationship. I've been married for 10 years. I have kids. If my wife suddenly couldn't have sex with me for some reason -- illness or injury or something -- I'm not divorcing her over it. That's heartless."
"Now, if she just decided we weren't ever having sex again because she didn't feel like it, that'd be different. Or if I was just starting to date someone and they told me they'd never have sex, I probably just wouldn't keep pursuing the relationship. Plenty of people out there who will."
Arkhangelzk
Necessity
"It depends on the circumstances. I LOVE doing it with my man but I love his heart and soul more. If we had to stop having sex for medical reasons or something I’d definitely stay with him and stay faithful. If I was single, I think it’s unlikely I’d start a new relationship knowing it would be sex free."
Fit_Technology8240
Heart and soul is just as necessary and hot and sweaty.
At least a lot of people recognize that.
Percentages
"Sex life is 10% of a relationship when it’s good and 90% of a relationship when it’s bad."
jakovichontwitch
"The other way I've heard it put is that sex is like the bathroom in your house. It's not the only reason you bought the house, but if it's not working it's a big problem."
molten_dragon
Age Related
"50-year-old here married for 27 years. It’s not important. It was important when we were younger but honestly, if sex wasn’t possible I would still love my wife and really nothing about our day would really change."
Kantforall
"I’ve been reading these comments and wishing that everyone’s age was flared on their post because I sense that there are a lot of under-60-year-olds. I am older than my wife but she is starting menopause and I can see the writing on the wall. Not super thrilled but I love her completely and understand. The real intimacy is in how we still (and will always) want to sleep touching each other and waking up next to each other."
caffeinated-hijinx
Kiss Me
"I honestly considered this before. I absolutely adored this guy. It was like a child relationship; we'd kiss and cuddle and hold hands and things, but he wouldn't have sex with me, nor would he commit properly. Any time we came close to sex, he'd go soft or back off."
"I couldn't understand it, wondered if I could keep doing that. My sex drive was wild. Why kiss and the rest but not sex?"
"Then one day he told me he was in love with me and asked me out properly. I said yes there and then, had a wonderful day with him, but when I went home, I was left questioning if I could possibly live without sex. I decided that yeah, I loved him but it would be tough."
"We had sex the next day. So yes, I think I probably could."
Adventurous_Train_48
Touchy/affectionate...
"It's very important. I'm a very affectionate and physical person and touch/caresses and anything physical is one of my love languages. I couldn't function with someone who is the opposite of me or who's uncomfortable with how I am. I already was in a relationship with someone who wasn't that touchy/affectionate and it created frustration for both of us."
Borboleta77
Don't Look at Me
"I am in a sexless relationship. He has erectile dysfunction and I really don't like sex in general. I'm really uncomfortable naked or even vulnerable. I'm shy around him despite the relationship being 10 years nearly, I'm even shy around my family and friends. Everything about sex makes me feel so embarrassed, and I feel nothing but negative feelings when I used to be sexually active. Not through choice of partner, I just hate that sort of attention."
NucularOrchid
Definitive!
"10/10. Sexual incompatibility is a deal breaker!"
oeeiae
Sex is important but not everything.
Until it is everything if it becomes an issue.
Good luck couples. Open and honest communication is key.
An important contributor to our overall health and happiness is the quality of our friendships.
We may not have a lot of friends, but the more important factor is the depth of those relationships.
But we've all had one of those friends who turned out not to be a very good friend at all.
Redditor Both-Support-7110 asked:
"When did you realize your 'friends' were just a**holes?"
Putting Them Down
"After I realized that other people don't s**t on each other on every possible occasion in their circle."
"And that it isn't right when a 'friend' uses every known insecurity as an argument against you when you do not behave the way he/she would want you to."
- fobopi9445
"I luckily made a couple of friends that would just be supportive about stuff. So I slowly started talking to them more than my older friends as I saw the disparity between their responses."
"One side purely would be purely judgmental and try and bring me down, and the other would just be excited for me or be there to listen or whatever. Who wants to talk to the former when you have the latter?"
- Universeintheflesh
Using Them as a Convenience
"They only bothered with me when it suited them. I'd rather have nobody than have to deal with that."
- fobopi9445
Trying to Keep Them Small
"When they were nice at first but then cut me out of conversations, telling me not to 'butt in.' A friend doesn't dictate when you're allowed to speak."
- leatherwolf89
"Total a**hole move to have conversations in front of you only to tell you it doesn’t concern you and mean it. . . Like making plans and giving details about how someone like you could be included but specifically telling you not to invite yourself; making plans in front of someone and not inviting them is awful."
- dearlysacredherosoul
Using Them as Entertainment
"She got a boyfriend and would let him listen to our phone calls and not tell me, even if I was crying about personal stuff that I would only ever tell her."
"Then they both started lying to me about my crush liking me back, forcing both him and me into awkward positions (telling everyone we liked each other so they'd play along, swapping places constantly to make us sit next to each other, pressuring him into giving me a lap dance, making him kiss the prettiest girl in the room, etc), and encouraged me to shoot my shot more and more."
"All the while they knew he didn't like me, he had told them both directly. One night, I was crying on the phone because I was so confused why my advances weren't working, and they just kept explaining it away, blaming some other bulls**t reason and telling me to try again."
"The next day, they told me they were laughing throughout the whole call because I didn't get it and I was so upset. I should add I had no dating experience at all and nobody had ever liked me at this point."
- vixayib976
Using Them to Feel Superior
"I didn't have many friends in grade school, but the times the kids actually gave me the time of day, it was to make me 'it' when we'd play tag. That's what I was there for. To continuously be 'it' so they could run away and feel superior. Because they knew I would agree to it no matter what."
- lunayoshi
Having Questionable Morals
"I had a friend that was a very promiscuous girl, I had no issue with that, until I found out she was using me and my innocent personality then, to distract her mom and make her think she was like me."
"Then she used my house as a literal hotel once, with my family here and everything... I knew that was it."
- luffve
Making Fun of Them
"When I made new friends and realized that it's not normal for friends to constantly beat on me and make fun of me."
- vatonef494
Prioritizing Money Over Them
"When they stopped being my friends after I went through a rough financial patch."
- fobopi9445
Becoming Flaky
"I had a group that I was in from 2019-2021. They became a**holes over time, and it took me longer to see that. It was when I failed my psych 101 class (I'm not the best with online classes and tried the best I could) and when they heard about that, they laughed to my face, called me stupid and a failure."
"Early 2022, I met up with them again thinking it would just be a 'listen to this concert for someone we all know and go on our ways' thing."
"My one closer friend offered to drive me and I accepted, and then afterward she joined the group, made eye contact after the concert was done and said, 'bye,' and left with them to the doors. They doubled back and said, 'You can come with us to another town to a friend's place or I can get my mom to drive you home.'"
"I was so overwhelmed and embarrassed that I just went with them to the other town. I called my brother to come to pick me up after an hour, and when he was on his way out, everyone else left. Haven't been into contact with them again after that."
- shortedgyasain
Disappearing When It Counts
"They pretty much abandoned me in a time of pretty intense need. It solidified my decision to leave the area and go do something worthwhile."
- verisimilitu
No Reciprocation Allowed
"When he does s**t to me and acts like it’s no big deal, but then I do the same back, and he gets offended."
- vatonef494
Excluding Them From Plans
"I've got two examples here. One from childhood and one from adulthood. Pick your favorite."
"Childhood: Kid I knew when I was 8 or so. We used to hang out a lot of the time and often played together, doing the usual kid stuff. Then one day, he has to move away because of a change in his parent's financial situation and I was pretty bummed out about it."
"On the last day we were supposed to see each other, he hung out with someone else instead and when tried to join them, he physically shoved me away and told me I wasn't welcome. That one stung."
"Adulthood: When they keep telling me about plans they made and things they did together or wanted to do together, but never bother to invite or include me in any of it. There's one of them I get along with and he'll invite me to things as long as it's just with him, but when he's with the group, he excludes me."
"I remember one example in particular where they were discussing a new site to do some photography and they fell short a man. One of them looks at me like I'm the spare tire in his car and goes: 'I guess you can come with us this one time.', to which another replies: 'Nah, he doesn't want to go. He doesn't like photography.'"
"I told him I was perfectly capable of answering for myself and didn't need him to act as my answering machine, but it lost a lot of impact because he was right. I don't like photography and didn't want to go. I just didn't like being talked about that way."
"Good luck making that clear to them, though. All they heard was: 'If he was right anyway, then why are you b*tching about it?'"
"I no longer hang out with them. I eventually got sick of being treated like the spare guy they can use in case none of the 'main crew' was attending, so I dropped them."
- Kuliari
Terrible Priorities
"In 2006, my then-best friend wanted to go to a big German metal festival. I did not want to go because my Dad had end-stage cancer."
"Dad died on August 8th, a couple of days after my friend returned from the festival. I called him because I needed someone to talk to."
"He very bluntly stated that he had no interest in my Dad's passing but wanted to tell me how great the festival was."
"You can't imagine how disappointed I was. For years, I'd been there for him whenever he got dumped, and the one time I needed a friend, he wasn't there for me. I told him to shut my door from the outside and lose my number."
- fobopi9445
Undesirable Behaviors
"I was 15, we were hanging out in the alleyway behind my friend’s house as we did almost every day after school."
"One girl was there from the year above us and they started prank calling the child protective services emergency line, pretending to be a child in distress, and they all laughed."
"After a few rounds of this, I felt queasy and left. Never hung out with them again. I still feel bad for not saying something or putting a stop to it, but the girl was older and 'cool.'"
- Brasscogs
Taking Advantage of Them
"I've been posting on him recently, he was my former neighbor and friend. We didn't immediately hit it off but after a while, we became good friends."
"I tried helping him out (he's an unemployed single dad of two special needs kids). He eventually saw my kindness as something to take advantage of, so late last fall, he either broke into my house (or enabled someone else to do it for him) and stole money from me."
"When I confronted him about this, he physically attacked me."
"I can't say it doesn't hurt."
- llcucf80
Friendships are incredibly important, but we're unfortunately not meant to be friends with everyone. Some people simply do not turn out to be the friends we thought they were.
We may know that this happens, but that doesn't make it hurt any less.
No one wants to be alone.
But that doesn't mean we should settle when it comes to choosing a romantic partner.
When people rush into things without letting love flourish, it could lead to problems down the line that can inevitably lead to difficult breakups.
Those who've learned this the hard way shared their experiences with love when Redditorlastknownstar asked:
"What common mistakes do people make when choosing a life partner?"
Communication is key.
Discussing Life Issues
"Not discussing big life issues: your preference for having kids, parenting styles, deep religious beliefs, career aspirations, significant traumas…anything that may affect how you make decisions together later on."
– AwkwardFortuneCookie
Outdated Notions
"My parents were like this. Dad grew up in a standard midcentury 'men run the house, women stay in the kitchen' family, but Mom came from a long line of domineering southern matriarchs who had their husbands whipped. Dad was naturally a good cook and Mom hated cooking, but once they got married, Dad insisted she make all the food because that's what wives are supposed to do. No warning, total 180 on their relationship up to that point."
"He's learned his lesson and now happily cooks for my stepmom, but man... That's not something you can just spring on your new spouse overnight!"
– shebbsquids
What About Kids
"Having kids is a really big question that absolutely needs to be communicated. I've also heard that it's a topic that would make the man a big red flag if asked early into the 'relationship' as in first date and/or texts are off limits."
"Wouldnt it be a lot nicer to 'speed date' these big topics early on?"
– Leaping_Turtle
These Redditors realized ignorance of financial responsibility in a relationship came at a cost.
Finances
"Finance is the number 1 leading cause of divorce."
"Edit: this popped up in my YouTube recommendation (Is your relationship struggling because of finance? - Dave Ramsey https://youtu.be/XuU7oabGqjk). Google is not monitoring us or anything"
– strangemanornot
Spending Habits
"This is such a big issue in relationships. Knowing each other's spending habits is equally important. My ex would be extremely judgmental when it came to my 'fun money', but when he bought a new TV or a new gaming console, he was not to be questioned on it."
– RewardNo3000
You can't change people.
Fixing Their Flaws
"Thinking, 'I know this person has flaws, but when we're married I can help fix them.'"
– DoctorExtra9060
"Ok marriage isn’t working but if we have kids things will change because it will bring us closer."
– Mrepman81
Parasitic Love
"I personally had this issue dating someone who was as sweet as could be, but not the brightest bulb in the socket, and they relied on me for knowledge on everything from health to history to housework. All perfectly googleable or troubleshootable questions, but always defaulted to giving up and asking mommy the girlfriend for help. Admittedly it was kind of an ego boost to have someone always telling me how smart I was and deferring to my judgement on everything, but that's not what a healthy romantic relationship should be like."
"I thought I could nudge them gently into being slightly more self sufficient, but it only got worse as they grew accustomed to relying on me for every little thing. And of course the flip side was I felt like I could never rely on them when I needed help... I knew I was SOL if I couldn't do everything myself, because I was dragging around a parasite instead of a partner."
"Next time I want to spend years working on a fixer-upper, I'm just going to buy a crumbling Victorian house. It'll cause me less stress in the long run."
– shebbsquids
Taking An Emotional Toll
"I was in a similar boat with an ex, wasn't so much her fault as she had a learning disability and epilepsy."
"Every other weekend we also looked after her kids from past relationships, one of which had autism, and due to my ex's condition she wasn't allowed to be on her own with the kids meaning I had to be there as the capable, responsible adult."
"We were together for just shy of 4 years."
"After she broke things off it took a good few months for me to get used to the fact that I could actually let my guard down, switch my brain off and relax. Without needing to constantly worry that someone would need my help or that I needed to ensure her safety."
"She didn't quite realise the toll it was having on me or the amount of responsibility was on my shoulders. She would constantly suggest things like holidays abroad with just us two and the kids, and all I could think was that it would be far from a relaxing holiday for me as I'd have her and two kids to look after and be responsible for the entire time."
– ShadowSurgeGaming
Managing expectations is key.
Never Settle
"Choosing someone they think they should be with instead of someone they're actually compatible with."
"I feel a lot of people have a picture in their head of who they think they'll end up with and chase that ideal, instead of acknowledging their own personality and aiming for someone compatible with that. Easier said than done, but yeah."
– Viminia7 ·
Importance Of Value
"I talk with my partner about this all the time. We think its important to have shared values not shared interests."
"Yes it’s important to share things you both like to do, but just because your partner likes One Punch Man, like you do, doesn’t mean they are on the same page as you with resolving conflicts."
– scsm
Elvis Presley reminded us that only fools rush in, despite his intense romantic feelings towards his object of affection.
But the wise men he was referring to were on to something.
It's best to ease into things and let love grow, and not force relationships without really getting to know the person with whom you plan to devote yourself to.
If it's meant to be, it'll be worth taking things slow by getting to know a prospective significant other's dreams, what makes them, and their values to see if there is enough chemistry to develop meaningful relationships.
Among the many reasons people watch, and rewatch, sitcoms is to imagine your life was more like the one you were watching.
Being able to afford a two-bedroom apartment in Greenwich Village on a line cook's salary, somehow always having the comfortable sofa available at your favorite coffee shop whenever you pop in, or having your best friends always available at your beck and call whenever you need them.
For the romantics, however, it's wishing you could have a romance like you've seen on television.
True not all sitcom romances are exactly the sort that makes you go all aflutter (Were Ross and Rachel actually on a break? And don't even get me started about Ted and Robin.)
Other sitcom couples are so captivating, though, that we would have given anything to be at their wedding... or at the very least go to their home for dinner every Friday.
And this includes plutonic couples, as there is nothing more heartwarming than a lasting friendship.
"What is the best couple in sitcom history?"
Creating An Even More Welcoming Community
"Troy and Abed. A couple of friends."- aghzombies
"They did grace the cover of Best Friends Weekly."- DwightsEgo
Sorry Amy...
"Peralta and Doug Judy."- DavosLostFingers
"Reunited and it feels so good 🎶."- Ghostenx
"PSYCH"!... No, Seriously...
"Shawn Spencer and Burton Guster."- dazedcap
"'I'm Black, he's Tan'."- CrueGuyRob
"Snap, Snap."
"The correct answer is Gomez and Morticia Addams."- Reddit
"They loved each other dearly. "
"They were completely enamored with each other, spent time with their kids, their family."
"Accepted everyone as they were."
"It wasn't til I was an adult That I realized married couples weren't meant to hate each other."
"My mother had many partners in my childhood, she's toxic and things were always chaotic."
"And watching 90s sitcoms, I thought married people were meant to hate each other, and I always wondered what the point was."- MissMurder8666
Overshadowed By Their Middle Child...
"Hal and Lois."- MrRocketman999
"As a husband, I don't think I can live up to Hal."
"He sort of sets a really high standard lol."
"He loves her like they are still in the honeymoon phase."
"So infatuated with her lol."- treathugger
A Better Couple? Many Would Say, "Knope"...
"Ben and Leslie."
"I' love you and I like you.'"
"Simple line, yet so powerful."- Radkeyoo
"Gruesome", But Adorable
"Frank and Charlie from Always Sunny in Philadelphia."
"The gruesome twosome."- Herr_Poopypants
The Parents Everyone Wished Were Theirs...
"Bob and Linda from 'Bobs burgers'."- shashybaws
"All of the Belchers have such great relationships with each other. "
"They're wholly accepting and supportive (even if they disagree)."
"They really love each other, and it shows."- SummerOfMayhem
UK Version Only, Of Course...
"Moss and Roy (The IT Crowd)."- pentapotamia
"'I'm your wife, Roy!'"- Summerof5ft6andahalf
"'If anything, I’m the husband!'"- pentapotamia
Afterlife Be Damned... Or not, Actually...
"Eleanor and Chidi from 'The Good Place.'"
"How can you beat two deeply flawed people who together make each other better over and over again?"- hotbimess
Ruining All Food For Viewers, One Food Group At A Time...
"The only correct answer is - Scully and Hitchcock."- Prestigious-Net-2236
"Back off! It's our microwave! Ours! GRRRRRRR!"- Lvcivs2311
Nostalgic And Wonderful
"Kitty and Red from That 70s/90s Show."- saginator5000
"I like how Red on the surface seems like a mean parent who doesn’t let his kids have fun."
"But he’s watching out for his kids."
"And he’s a good man."
"He has a hard and stressful time supporting his family and he is grumpy sometimes but he would do anything for his family and he really loves them."
"What he does for Hyde is amazing."
"He just doesn’t put up with BS."- themanfromvulcan
It Seems Everyone Is Better With Turk At Their Side
"Turk and Carla."
"Or Turk and JD. (Scrubs)."- JCBAwesomist
"Turk and JD all the way."- nunyabidnez76
Can't We Get Back What We Once Had?...
"Homer and Marge had a lot of beautiful moments back in the older seasons."
"Sadly, seasonal rot has ruined a lot of that."
"I miss a lot of how the characters used to be."
"Like, Homer was an oaf and a brute, but he loved his family immensely and deeply and would (and DID) do any and everything for them."
"He'd catch details like in that episode about the streetcar play that you wouldn't think he would."
"He gave up beer for a month for Marge and we got to see that, for him, it wasn't just a minor thing."
'Lisa might have been intelligent but she not only had ample 'dumb/shallow' moments, she also was very close to Bart and, likewise, Bart was close to her."
"He might struggle in school but he also showed he wasn't dumb either."- Snowtwo
Be they married in the first episode or on and off again for an insufferable amount of time (looking at you, Jeanine and Gregory in Abbott Elementry!), sitcom couples give us people to root for and fill our own hearts with hope.
So much so that we don't mind following the arc of their love stories over and over again.
And yes, the episode where David meets Patrick's parents remains a tearjerker, no matter how many times you watch it.