Sometimes our demons will get the better of us.
Rage and emotion will often lead to a hysteric choice.
So when these moments arise we have to learn self-soothing methods.
Because not matter the cause of the behavior, there is always going to be consequences to actions.
We can't undo life.
It may feel good to unleash hell fire and all that, but... five minutes later.
You're cleaning up debris.
RedditorBitter_Chapter1798wanted everyone to fess up about the times they were shocked by their own bad behavior.
They asked:
"What’s the worst thing you’ve done in the heat of the moment?"
This topic is an issue I can relate too. I have some bad behavior, heat of the moment issues. Clearly, we all do.
Cancelled
Sassy Over It GIF by NickelodeonGiphy"I used to go to the gym and sneak into the health suite (sauna, steam room, hot tub) without paying. Got busted and had to pay on the way out. Manager was nice and said 'look… just pay next time ok?' I said 'I won’t get caught next time.'"
"She said 'consider your membership cancelled.'"
josoap99
Ashy Thief
"Childhood friend died and I was about 20. He liked my drawings, so I wrote him a goodbye letter on the back of one of my drawings. He had been cremated, and I found myself alone in a room with the urn, so I opened it up. His ashes were in a bag, so I stuffed the drawing/letter down alongside the bag, thinking that way I could hide it from his family."
"When I did that, the bag ripped and I got his ashes all over my hands. I brushed off what I could into the urn but had to wash some of him down the sink. It was awful and I’m still guilty about it decades later."
skelly6
So close...
"My parents were tailors and they used to do a lot of work from home. They had really big, heavy metal scissors they used to use. I was very young. Under 10 for sure. My older brother did something to piss me off. I grabbed the scissor near me and threw it at him. It missed his eyes by a small fraction. He went ballistic on why would I do something like this. 25+ years later the memory still makes me sad how close I was to seriously injuring or killing my brother."
JustARandomPokemon
Window Treatment
"I didn’t do it but it happened near me. I was working construction one summer, and the 'veteran' guy working with me got into a fight with the foreman and came back to the floor we were working on all pissed off, kicking things around. We were up on the 4th floor, and windows hadn’t gone in yet. He picks up a huge level and flings it out the window, and about 5 seconds later says 'F**k! That was mine.'"
Jealous-Network-8852
Don't Throw
Scooter Yolo GIF by NOSAMGiphy"I was probably 10-12 hanging out with the neighborhood kids one being a few years younger."
"He was being annoying as hell and wouldn’t stop so after a few minutes of constant annoyance I threw my scooter at him… hitting his head. No serious injuries but he needed a few stitches. I knew I messed up the instant the scooter left my hands."
apaulo_18
Wow, people really have some behavior issues. I'm not alone.
Damn FB
motion picture thumbs up GIF by A. L. CregoGiphy"Back in college it was the first week at a new school and I was on my computer waiting for my evening class to start. Someone asked if they could use my computer to log into their student account to see where their class was."
"I let them do it and had my Facebook account open in the other tab. They updated my Facebook status to something VERY racist thinking they were funny, but forgot to close out of their school account. Once I figured out what they did (thanks to a FURIOUS phone call from my mother) I used their account to drop all of the classes they signed up for."
flyguystandingby
Said what I said...
"I was being lightly scolded by my boss, and instead of rolling with it, I got pissed and told him 'you know what, suck my d**k' and left. I was not in a financial situation to quit at the time, and regretted my decision the entire elevator ride out of there, but looking back now it's easy to say 'worth it.'"
earic23
Dig Deeper
"When I was 18 I got a job in excavation. I was learning how to dig with a trackhoe. Fast forward a year. And I’m still learning the tricks. My boss screamed at me for parking the work truck in the wrong place. Then told me either I need to learn to dig faster and better or find a new job. Well I said forget it. And I started digging fast as I could. And then, I found the freaking city water main."
letsgetnerdy95
In his face...
"I was a teenager, I was helping my family clear out our basement, sorting old clothes and toys to donate or dispose off. Me and me and my brother are horsing around when I spot an absolutely ancient water gun. I pick it up swiping away cobwebs and what do you know water is sloshing around the reservoir, so I pump it a couple times and spray my little brother directly in his face."
"He screams instantly and not the fun haha you sprayed me with water scream. The water smells like mold and death, it's left over from the last time we played with the guns which was years ago. He gets a bacterial infection in both eyes, cycles antibiotics and comes away from it whole. I catch crap about this at every family gathering and will until one of us dies."
SuicideKingsHigh
Shoot!
Judge Joe Brown GIFGiphy"Told the judge, 'Gimmie your best shot.'"
"10 added days for contempt of court."
Feels2old
Be Fit
"Late night impulse buys. In the height of the pandemic I ending up buying a little too expensive rowing machine for my apartment thinking I was going to be all fit. Now it’s just collecting dust in a corner."
"Edit: After seeing all the replies and the interest for my rowing machine… I’ve decided to use it this morning. Got to 15mins before calling it quits. I’ll keep at it."
Final_Distance_9275
Just a Concussion
"When I was in tenth grade a classmate of mine pissed on my shoes. I didn't not snap right then and there, but he made fun of my looks a couple minutes later. I completely lost my sh*t, grabbed him by the neck and slammed his head into a steel beam. In hindsight I realize that I could have killed him or disabled him for life, but luckily he got away with a bad concussion."
Tall-Structure-8670
Psych
"I work hospital security, and we hold a lot of violent psych patients until they can be transferred to a behavioral facility. This surprisingly strong old man assaulted a nurse when she was trying to change his briefs, and I responded first. I was wrestling with the guy and trying to hold him in the bed until backup got there."
"He finally calmed down, looked me in the eye, and told me something to the effect of 'When I get out of here I'm going to kill you and your wife.' And I responded, 'Big words for a man in a diaper.' I've never seen anyone rage harder. Dude genuinely tried his best to kill me. But thankfully my co-workers got there right afterward and nobody got hurt."
MozeoSLT
Bad Messages
Text Chat GIF by IlizaGiphy"Texting when I’m pissed off. The anger goes away, the text remains for eternity."
ThinkIGotHacked
"Sometimes I write a really long message then delete it before I send because the anger I've put into writing it usually goes before I am finished spell checking it."
spikeyunpeeledbanana
'because I always do'
"I don’t know about 'heat of the moment' but when a cop asked why I thought I could go that fast down that road I (without thinking) responded 'because I always do' then realized what my mouth had just said without consulting my brain and proceeded to lay my head against my steer wheel forcefully in shame."
BestAtempt
Years Later
"My oldest son was still a baby and I was a fresh teenaged dad. It was the middle of the night and he was screaming. I was sleep deprived and I was getting screamed at in my ear... and he was sick and cranky and nothing would help. I went to move him and his baby fist hit me in the eye or something."
"But either way, I swatted it away really fast and hard and he cried even louder. I kept rocking him and crying and holding him even after he fell asleep. I felt so bad. Almost 9 years later and I still feel awful about it."
SigynsRaine
"Is that a trick question?"
"A cop busted us hotboxing my car, it was Feb and freezing outside and had 2 of my friend with me. after they searched the car and broke our bong and let us sweat for a few min the cop came to my window and asked me if I was ok to drive."
"Due to my paranoia and because we were parked I assumed to cop was getting me to drive so that he could give me a DUI so I responded 'Is that a trick question?' he was taken back and got annoyed 'no it's not a trick question.' Me... 'Oh well yeah I do this all the time.' Ahh the teenage years."
Lemmonjello
Night Sweats
Angry Trash GIF by BLoafXGiphy"Middle of summer, caught my girlfriend cheating and in the heat of the moment threw my fan at the wall, I was not only sad and alone but sad, alone and sweaty that fateful night."
timingandstructure
Life lesson: Next time... be calm, think first.
Reddit user FunChemical3182 asked:
"What is the weirdest animal fact you know?"
Like Perry
"Platypus glow blueish green under ultraviolet light."
"They also don’t have nipples, they just exude milk from glands under the skin and the baby’s lap it up."
~ WakingOwl1
"They have electrolocation in their bills that lets them detect their food under water."
~ DrPlatypus1
"And they lay eggs."
"The more I find out about them the more I understand why people first thought they were fake."
~ Reidroshdy
"After seeing all these platypus facts I am convinced these things are aliens that have been abandoned on Earth."
~ SeattleOne206
Kapow!
"Mantis Shrimp have 16 different sets of cones. Rods and cones are in your eyes. Cones see color, rods see light and motion."
"Dogs have 2 sets of cones—green and blue. Humans have 3 sets of cones—green, blue and red."
"Mantis Shrimp are seeing colors we can't comprehend and explains why they're very colorful."
"That’s not even the strangest thing about them."
"They can also punch as fast as a .22 bullet which cause a cavitation bubble which boils the water around them at temperatures of several thousand Kelvins."
~ RigzDigz
GiphyTerrible Twos
"Cats have the mental capacity of a 2-year-old which makes a lot of sense."
~ Alive_Ad823
Cats Dragging GIFGiphyLike Tinder
"When a female sloth wants a mate she'll hang onto a tree branch and just scream."
~ Remarkable_Sink2542
GiphyGood Thing They're So Small
"Dragonflies are the most successful predators on Earth."
"When lions choose prey they have like a 10% chance of catching it."
"African painted dogs—who hunt in packs—have the highest kill rate of any mammal, successfully catching 51% of their prey."
"When a dragonfly locks onto a target, it has a 99.9% success rate!"
~ PurpleInevitable2103
GiphyOn A Swivel
"Owls have really long necks, but it's hard to notice that because their feathers are so fluffy."
~ ergonaut
GiphyWhat About Cousin It?
"Sea otters are the most densely furred animal with 600,000 to 1,000,000 hair follicles per square inch."
"Dogs have about 15,000 per square inch, humans on average are between 800 to 1,290 hairs per square inch."
~ atom1129
Giphy
Sucker Punchers
"Octopus punch other fish for no reason—so, for fun."
~ Samanthalynn8915
"There's a direct correlation between species' intelligence and dickish behavior."
~ TheDesktopNinja
Looks Are Deceiving
"Polar bear fur isn't white—it's translucent (for most frequencies of light). And they have black skin underneath."
"So polar bear fur lets all the light through to their black skin to warm them—except for a few visible frequencies to keep them camouflaged as white."
~ seedanrun
GiphyWho's Going To Attack One‽‽
"Honey badgers can turn their a**holes inside out and use the smell to deter attackers."
"Not sure what exactly has the guts to attack a honey badger, but if they have the courage to do so, the badger sure as hell isn’t gonna make it easy."
~ nonexistantauthor
GiphyBig Momma
"The Blanket Octopus exhibits the highest degree of sexual dimorphism known."
"Females: About 6 feet across."
"Males: About one inch."
~ Fabulous-Pause4154
High Times
"Dolphins will intentionally use puffer fish to get high."
~ altkaldra
"They upset blowfish so they inflate, and therefore emit poison. It gets the dolphins high. Then they pass it around, literally."
~ smack4u
"Not just the dolphins. I recently saw a video about 10 animals that like to get high. Very interesting."
~ s137leo__
"Lemurs do that with giant centipedes/millipedes too."
~ chubbyknuckles420
Fabrizio Frigeni on Unsplash
Better Than Bike Helmets
"Woodpeckers' tongues wrap around their brains to cushion them from the vibrations of slamming their face into trees all day."
~ we_made_yewww
"Their tongues also have barbs to grab bugs out of the holes."
"Their brains have additional cushioning because, you know, they spend their days smashing their face as hard as possible into trees."
~ RhynoD
Detachable Organs
"Argonauts [paper nautili] are small octopuses that are too lazy to have intercourse."
"They detach their penises and toss them into the open sea to mate with female argonauts."
"The detachable 'd*ck' is a tiny tentacle, complete with suckers and sperm, that develops in a cavity under the eye of a male argonaut [paper nautilus]."
"When it's time to mate, the tentacle explodes out of the cavity, instantly killing the male argonaut. The tentacle then swims towards a female argonaut to insert itself."
"Sexy, huh?"
~ Schwarzes__Loch
What's your favorite weird animal fact?
Tough guys put on a facade that indicates to others that they always know what's going on.
But their confidence doesn't always match their intellect, which is probably why they cover their insecurities by walking around and trying to show everyone who's really the boss.
If that's the case, they should keep their mouths shut because not everything that comes out of their mouth needs to be heard.
Yet, it can be amusing to everyone else.
Curious to hear examples of these, Redditor PrototypeShadowBlitz asked:
"Reddit, what is the stupidest thing you've heard from the 'alpha male' community?"
You might find these guys at a bar.
The Dude Must Be Hungry
"Had a run in once with a group of young lads about something in a bar and one of them said we are top of the food chain bro and you will be the prey."
– insertitherenow
"'Whatever, mall ninja" -proper response."
– TheEighthLord
If The Shoe Fits
"That they were an alpha male."
– I_Have_A_Name37654
"The use of 'Alpha Male,' unironically is every indication that you're dealing with a child's understanding of manhood."
– 88Dubs
Brat Pack
"Me and my bros are all alpha males."
– SonOfDadOfSam
"I was skiing one time and rode the lift with a guy that said, 'I don't feel no pain. I live with 5 roommates and none of us feel any pain.' Okay, bud. That's a really interesting coincidence."
– NicPizzaLatte
They sure thrive on making sexist comments.
Contagious Femininity
"A coworker said, 'I don't spend too much time with my girlfriend because I'll become too feminine.'"
– Lazy_Natural6154
"FELLAS IS IT GAY?!"
– aliebabadegrote
Sexist Categorization
"I have been called a beta for saying that my wife makes more money than I do. She works in a more lucrative field and is more educated than I am, so it makes perfect sense that she makes more than I do."
"So I came back, and this post has really blown up. There's just a few things I want to clarify."
"1- I have only ever been called a beta online."
"2- I work full-time in project management. I have a master's degree. I have a 6 figure salary."
"3- My wife has a PhD and works in finance. She also has a 6 figure salary, it's just a higher salary than my own."
"4- I'm sorry to anyone who might feel as though my original post misled them."
– ExaminationDouble240
It's Teamwork
"A real man would be proud of his wife for achieving success, and not fall for that sort of insecure bullsh*t."
"It's not a contest, that's the real joke here. Good on you for seeing the big picture."
– Mrbeardoesthethings
Do these roles about parenting sound familiar?
Childish Things Are Too Girly
"Real men don't take their kids trick or treating is one that I heard recently."
– constructionguy89
"Related. Guys who brag about not changing diapers, not playing 'girly' games, etc. Essentially guys who brag that their only contribution to fatherhood is money and masculine things like fishing or football. Even then some of them brag about not paying a lot of child support to prove they didn't let the system take advantage of them."
"I can't imagine a life so empty my only accomplishment worth bragging about was being a terrible parent."
– Green7000
This Woman's Work
"I was told that taking care of my kids is woman's work. Apparently it's concerning that I try to spend so much of my free time with them. Oddly enough the meatheads at my grappling club think it's sweet I occasionally have my daughters' hair clips on and nails painted."
– MrFunktasticc
People discussed rules in the bedroom.
Never Submissive
"That a man is turned off when their wife/girlfriend seduces them, because if she wants sex and shows it she is a sl*t, also making the man the submissive one…"
– kamalaophelia
Stifling Emotions
"Not the whole community, but was cuddling with a guy once and could tell he was trying not to get emotional over something that was bothering him. He said, quite literally, 'it's not alpha male behaviour.' I told him that I liked that he showed emotions sometimes, and he looked disgusted by the fact that I pointed it out."
– LambLifts
In high school, a classmate who was on the football team said I was a "sissy" for listening to classical music.
The other classmates laughed at me, which was hardly surprising since all of the guys on our unbeatable football team were considered stars on campus.
This kind of mockery was a typical day for me.
I can laugh at their idiotic comments now but back then, I don't know why I ever let them get under my skin.
We've all done things, or in some cases, regularly do things that others might consider weird.
Even so, we often feel no shame or embarrassment and embrace how unusual these habits are, and take our friends teasing or laughing at us for doing so in stride.
Sometimes, however, we might not like to advertise some of our unusual habits or actions and make every effort to keep them a well-guarded secret.
As raised eyebrows are much easier to take than blatant judgment from friends and peers.
Redditor Key_Nectarine_1969 was curious to hear all the weird things people have done which they still keep under lock and key, leading them to ask:
"What’s the weirdest thing you’ve done that you could only tell people anonymously?"
The Devil [Dogs] Is In The Detail...
"All throughout middle school, there was someone who tucked unwrapped Hostess Devil Dogs into the toilet paper dispensers in the bathrooms, so that when you pulled some toilet paper out, the devil dog would fall out into your hand."
"We had to have an assembly about it."
"That person... Was me."- bejeweled_sky
Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time
"Was drunk at an escape room with coworkers."
"It was an extreme one where you are handcuffed the entire time."
"I decided in my drunken state that it would be bada** to dislocated my thumb and slip off the cuffs like the movies."
"It wasn't."
"We got kicked out, my coworkers were weirded out and I had to go to the hospital."
"I quit a few weeks later."
"White collar wasn't for me."- Grotesque-penguin
The Bread Of Heaven
"Stole over 1,000 wafers from church because I really liked the communion wafers & didn’t know where else to get them."
"I felt really blessed & cursed for a long time."- hALLIEcinate
catholic the exorcist GIFGiphyRetracing Steps...
"Once I got off the subway in NYC and I was super early for an appointment."
"So I picked a random guy and just followed him on foot for like 30 minutes, pretending I was like a private detective or something."
"Always kept about a half block behind."
"He turned this way and that, and eventually went into a building I had lived in 9 years earlier."
"It was weird, and so was I."- OKsurewhynotyep
Hygeine Be Damned...
"I found a dead rat in a field when i was younger and kissed it bc I wanted to say goodbye."- qeleia
exercise push up GIFGiphyBad Decisions Have A Way Of Getting Back To You...
"We got super drunk and ate a ton of spicy food in New Orleans."
"Back at the B&B, the food started to come out the back side."
"I was sitting on the toilet sh*tting bricks of fire."
"At that moment, the booze decided to hang a u-turn."
"The trash can was out of reach and I couldn't risk standing up from the toilet for even 5 seconds."
"The closest receptacle was the bathtub."
"I managed to turn in such a way that I could keep shi*ting in the toilet while projectile vomiting into the tub."
"Both ended up clogged, and there was no plunger."
"I had to call the owner to explain that I had destroyed both their toilet and their tub simultaneously."- HoopOnPoop
Things Best Left To Professionals...
"My partner is weirdly prone to cysts."
"I had to drain a 3 inch cyst on her back (thankfully she had a dr's appt the next week), then multiple other little cysts on her legs and chest."
"I never told her to her face but that first giant cyst literally haunted me, the amount of pus and blood I saw....good heavens."- SleepyBiologist
uruguay spot GIF by sargentoPezGiphyAt Least A Lesson Was Learned...
"When I was walking to school one morning, I saw a kid (7-8 yo?) kicking a dog."
"I ran over & kicked the kid and asked him how it felt."
"He ran off and no one saw."
"Still not sorry."- sneezyailurophile
All Creatures Deserve Love
"I was extremely socially isolated as a child and tried to make friends with the coyotes who lived in the woods by our home."
'I caught one in a snare and fed and kept her."
"I wanted a friend."- letthetreeburn
That's What Friends Are For...
"My wife and her best friend pick me up from a frat party black out drunk."
"Then they helped me take a sh*t on the toilet, wiped my a** and then gave me a shower and put me to bed naked."
"Don’t remember any of it."- nc3100
Party Love GIF by Chris CiminoGiphyNot The Right Kind Of Manure...
"One time I went outside at like 2AM and put the garden hose nozzle into my butthole and sprayed some water into it, then farted it out onto the lawn."
"Basically gave myself an enema with a garden hose."
"I did this because I was bored."
"My neighbour saw me and told my dad (lived at home at the time)."- WaspsInMyGoatse
A Little Fantasy Now And Then...
"When I was younger I joined an international dating site that I figured was a scam."
"Put a black square as my picture and gave myself a fake name, and then looked through their users."
"And after about 10 minutes I had like a 100 messages."
"Most of them were messages telling me how handsome I was or how these women fell in love with me at first site."
"Now I knew it was a scam but when ever I felt down or got rejected for a while I would pop back on the site and read a few messages."
'Yeah it’s kinda cringy and probably pathetic but it made me feel better."
"I would just turn off that logical part of my brain that knew it was a scam for awhile and just pretend I was this popular and desirable guy."
"And it honestly got me through the day sometimes."- Demonking3343
dating app GIFGiphyIf anyone says they've never done anything they're ashamed, or at the very least less-than-proud of, in all likelihood, they are lying.
Or, more likely, they understandably want to pretend that it never happened.
Which might be a little easier than harboring a secret.