Angry People Reveal Why They Went To War With Their Neighbors[rebelmouse-image 18345426 is_animated_gif=
Neighbor wars are hilarious in comedy films. Nobody really gets hurt, everything is funny, shirtless Zac Effron shows up and that's always good times. Real life can sometimes be just as hilarious as movies, but does that apply to the neighbor war trops? One Reddit user asked: Redditors who have gone to "war" with a neighbor, what's your story?
Yup, this is every bit as petty as you would think it is. We've got passive-aggressive bird feeders, nun fights, and a mariachi band that just won't stop. It's more than just that, though. Things get dark, of course, cause this is Reddit. Lives are lost, children are neglected, people are awful. Real neighbor wars don't often involve Zac Effron - much less shirtless Zac Effron.
Dancing On The Ceiling[rebelmouse-image 18345428 is_animated_gif=
Had a neighbor that lived downstairs. Did all sorts of loud s*** late into the night. Usually music and friends. One day I had enough and after about 10 minutes of very loud music I just started stomping on the floor. He came bursting out of his apartment and pounding on my door. I answered, acting very confused. "You need to stop stomping around! I'm trying to work!"
"I wasn't stomping."
"Yes you were!"
"I was dancing to your s****y music. Turn it down and it'll never happen again."
It never happened again.
The Mariachi Neighbor[rebelmouse-image 18345433 is_animated_gif=
The house I grew up at had that issue, new neighbors moved in and they would absolutely blast obnoxious mariachi music with as much bass as they could get out of their speakers, for most of the day.
We would ask them to turn it down, to no effect. I think they used to tell us they would, but then wouldn't. Eventually they got so irritated with us asking that once when I went over there to ask (16 or 17 years old), the "man" of the house threatened me with physical violence for asking.
So we started calling the cops. Unfortunately, they knew we were the ones calling, so everytime the cops showed up at their house for a noise complaint our vehicles would be vandalized: tires slashed, hoods and doors kicked in, etc.
As far as I know, the police were never able to do anything like issue a fine or anything like that. So it had no effect on them whatsoever.
Fighting A Bunch Of Nuns[rebelmouse-image 18345434 is_animated_gif=
My parent's neighbor constantly blows his leaves onto my parent's property. My dad tried to confront him a few times and the guy literally ran away every time. Yes, a grown man dropped his leafblower and ran inside and locked the door and pretended not to be home when he saw my dad coming, on multiple occasions. My father is not a scary man.
My dad was finally able to confront him one day -- he was super polite and said the guy could blow the leaves into their woods, but just not onto their clean lawn. The guy responded, "your property doesn't start until 10 feet from the road, so you can't do anything about it. If you want me to stop, sue me." This is technically correct, as the property is off a private road owned by a convent, and per state law the owner of the road also owns the 10 feet of land on either side of the road.
So, my dad called up the Convent and asked if the neighbor is allowed to dump his leaves on their property. Turns out they don't like that, so now instead of being in a neighborly argument with my parents, he's trying to fight a bunch of nuns in court. Not a good look.
Dorm Life[rebelmouse-image 18345435 is_animated_gif=
Live in a dorm with shared kitchen and toilet. One neighbor refused to buy toilet paper and always stole food. During a summer break only him and me were living at the dorm and he continued the practice so I made some stew and put a lot of laxatives in it. I also left only one roll of toilet paper in the bathroom that was covered in itching power.
He was PISSED, but I laugh whenever he tries to scold me for it
Four Months And Dozens Of Phone Calls[rebelmouse-image 18345436 is_animated_gif=
Years ago my upstairs neighbors were wanted felons living in an apartment leased by the ladies brother, they sold drugs out of there, loud music 8am-12am, locked their daughter outside for hours at a time so we would do things with her and give her snacks. You could tell her social and educational development was way behind. After finding their pictures online on the MN 50 most wanted I called the police - they didn't believe me. They called me a child (I was 22) all while the neighbors behavior got worse as more people reported them.
It took them 4 months and dozens of phone calls to finally get the police to arrest fugitives they were supposedly looking for...
Cold War Lawncare[rebelmouse-image 18345438 is_animated_gif=
It's more of a Cold War situation. When my boyfriend cuts the grass, even if our neighbor just cut his grass a few days prior, he (our neighbor) will cut his again the next day. He's an old man who can't stand to have his lawn just a smidge taller than ours.
Cruise Neighbors[rebelmouse-image 18345439 is_animated_gif=
On a week long cruise. First two mornings our neighbors on both sides were ridiculously loud basicaly screaming in Spanish and constantly waking us up. We didn't go to bed until 3-4am so they cut into your sleep. On 3rd night at around 10-11pm we go to our room, blasted the TV (side note-TV's on cruises should be programmed to not go as loud as we made it) and left it like that until 3-4am. You could hear it outside our door, it was very loud like they were. Next morning what do you know the neighbors realized other people can hear them and were quiet the rest of the cruise.
He Got A Fence[rebelmouse-image 18345440 is_animated_gif=
When I was in elementary school, our neighbor's four dogs would always poop in our backyard. My mom asked the neighbor many times to pick it up, but he never did.
So every morning before school, my mom would send me and my brother on 'poop patrol'. At first we just put the poop in the neighbor's yard, but our neighbor never got the hint. My mom then had us put the poop on his porch and then he got a fence.
Food War[rebelmouse-image 18345441 is_animated_gif=
Well it all started one day when they were having their fence put in and one of the workers accidentally snapped one of our tomato plants at the base. So she decided to take it inside and cook all of the green tomatoes into this unbelievably yummy Indian food I can't even begin to pronounce or spell and brought it over as an apology. Then we made fresh cut pasta and gave them some to give the container back because we of course didn't want to keep it. Then they had the audacity to make us some Indian desert thing that tasted like heaven by then our garden had started to produce so we gave them two bags of produce that would have gone to waste and they gave use some eggplant dish. So we brought over a tray of cookies and now it's three years later and we are in a heated war over who can out food the other.
We're fighting a losing battle though because they are vegetarian and we are not so we have to modify most of what we make for them but we have a huge vegetable garden so we have the leg up on that.
Water Bottle Mountain[rebelmouse-image 18345442 is_animated_gif=
My neighbor leaves trash in their yard. We have a HOA that is basically as feckless as possible. And this isn't some s*** neighborhood, we're talking 300k in Columbus, Ohio, which is about as upper middle class as you can get in the midwest.
They don't tie up their garbage bags, so some random falls out, and blows into my yard. I took the 6 pieces I could find and duct taped them to their garage, because I wanted them to be aware of the issue.
For all of winter, they threw their plastic water bottles into a pile next to their garage, and it kept getting bigger and bigger until the snow melted and it was way too obvious, so they finally trashed it.
And if all this is too specific, and my neighbor happens to read this, then clean up your trash you Vernon Dursley looking f***.
Cocaine Club[rebelmouse-image 18345443 is_animated_gif=
I lived next door to a coke club for years. They'd start up around 11PM or midnight, and go till dawn.
The cops (Brooklyn) were clearly on the take, as they'd repeatedly tell me during the day that the place had been closed down, and yet they were showing up three or four times a week there to deal with fights. I asked one of them about why they couldn't close the place at 4AM one day after a particularly noisy fight, and they wouldn't even look me in the eye.
We had a huge number of beer bottles because I also used the place as a performance/rehearsal space, so at a certain point I'd start throwing bottles out my window to smash at their back door when they were noisy.
They really hated that, but as I pointed out, what were they going to do, call the cops? So they eventually managed to keep the noise down. It kinda worked out!
Eventually they were gentrified out of existence...
Babies To The Rescue[rebelmouse-image 18345444 is_animated_gif=
Back in like 2009-2010 I was at war with my downstairs neighbor. She would hit her ceiling with a broom stick, and I would point my bass speaker down toward the floor. I got pregnant with twins that were high risk, and got a temporary handicapped placard for parking closer. She borrowed one and took my spot.. few months go by of straight war...then I had my twins.
My washing machine had flooded her kitchen, and she came up to scream at me for ruining her dinner. I yelled back something sarcastic like: **"I totally did it on purpose, I mean come on lady!" **
She laughed, I laughed..and she asked to see the babies (they were in their swings in her line of sight) and just like that, it was over. I'll be damned if we didn't stop messing with each other, and that woman was the ONLY person to help me. We became best friends, and still are to this day. We still laugh at our silly war. Thank you Heather!
Bicycle Mediation[rebelmouse-image 18345446 is_animated_gif=
I ride my bike to the train station in the mornings. I have to ride past a few houses on the sidewalk before I can move onto the street. One day, a neighbor comes at me and accuses me of 'almost' hitting him with my bicycle. Now, I have no idea what he talked about since I've never been anywhere close to him but he insists on it. Fast forward a few weeks he complaints again that everybody keeps riding their bicycle on the sidewalk and he's scared for his life. He says he's terrified that people will hit him because he's deaf in one ear and won't hear them coming.
He doesn't look where he's goes and instead relies on what he can hear from his other ear, but that's outside the story!
I reassured him, saying I would go very slowly and watch out for him.
I almost never see him after that. Fast forward 2 months and suddenly a mediator shows at my door telling me that my neighbor wants to talk, but doesn't want to do it alone. I'm confused. The questions keep adding up. I told the mediator that if he wants to talk he can just knock on the door and we will talk, never had a problem with him before so no idea why he would now. Nothing came from that.
Another 2 months pass without incident. Then one day police officers show up at the door. Neighbor has filed a complaint about not only me, but also my other neighbor, claiming that we are threatening with the way we ride. That neighbor doesn't even know how to ride a bicycle. I explained the story to the police. They advised to be careful around his house, which I already was.
Another month later another mediator shows up and wants to talk with us together. At this point I refuse it. He's had plenty of opportunities and this is literally about things that aren't happening. This was 2 months ago, I wonder when his next complaint will be.
Deadly Dirt[rebelmouse-image 18345447 is_animated_gif=
A guy down the street from where I used to live would complain to me about how his neighbours wouldn't move their tractor and dirt load, they'd complain to me about his dogs being loose etc. One day a few years ago the guy complaining about the dirt strolled into their house and shot the elderly couple and their middle aged son dead.
Get Some Anger Management[rebelmouse-image 18345448 is_animated_gif=
Currently at war with two young women who live across the street. I'm a pretty live-and-let-live guy, so this took a lot.
I ignored the overgrown lawn and piles of leaves they raked up and left there to moulder. I didn't like the assorted s*** that collected on their front lawn, but that wasn't enough to prod me into action.
I didn't like the front-step parties they'd have every weekend that kept me awake or forced me to close my windows and turn on the AC. But I didn't call the city. Not even then they'd wake me, yelling in the middle of the street at 4 AM.
What finally put me over the edge is one has two kids. The oldest is about three years old. She shouts obscenities at him. Daily. The first time it happened I thought "You shouldn't do that, but kids can drive even the most reasonable person around the bend." Then I realized it was every day.
The poor little guy never says a word. It's like learned helplessness. The I started to listen for it, and realized she was constantly scream at them and berating them inside the house too, though I couldn't hear particulars. Just constant screaming.
You better believe I called Child and Family Services. I don't give a s*** if those horrible people key my car at 4 AM. If you treat a child like that, you don't deserve to have that child.
I am currently raining regulatory hell down on their heads through all the channels I can find... I will not stop until either those kids are taken from her or she gets some goddamned anger management.
Dogs And Fences[rebelmouse-image 18345449 is_animated_gif=
Dog kept chewing through old fence, kept coming up with excuses why he wouldn't pay his half to replace the fence. We shouldn't have had to pay any of it since it would have been structurally fine if his dog didn't keep chewing holes in it and escaping into our back yard. We decided to start leaving our side gate open, the dog would chew threw and then go wandering through the neighbourhood. After the third pick up from the pound he decided to buy scrap wood and patch up the holes.
Soccer Players[rebelmouse-image 18345451 is_animated_gif=
Lived in a dorm with 5 other guys in college and had to move out to the dorm across the quad building. (it was a total of like 40 ft move.) below us were the soccer players. They were a rowdy bunch and often partied until 3-4 am with loud music and drinking, often times we could feel the floor vibrate and we called safety services on them to get them to quiet down. Well when we were moving the decided to egg our door. we called safety services who claimed they "didn't have cameras" up on that particular set of dorms.
So, since they "didn't have cameras", we egged them back. Safety service was called on us. They said they knew we did it because they saw the footage. We reminded them they "didn't have cameras" on that area. If they punished us, they would also have to punish the soccer players.
We then found out how to stop their music by trying to connect to their bluetooth speaker. Victory.
Taking It Out On Us[rebelmouse-image 18345452 is_animated_gif=
We had some problems with our former neighbor. He would come over and yell at us over the most random things that were A. never actually wrong, and/or B. not actually our fault. Once he came over on a Sunday morning ringing our doorbell & throwing a tantrum about some vines growing on the back fence. My husband went back there with him to check things out, and sure enough, they were growing up from the neighbor's side. Another time my husband was out in our driveway washing out a couple of flower pots and the dude came out of his house & started screaming at us about spraying dirty water into his yard (we weren't). He also called the fire department on us for smoking a brisket. Just lots of small weird incidents like that.
This was a relatively normal guy in his 40s with a job, wife & 2 kids, and we live in a pretty nice suburban neighborhood. LOL. It wasn't like it was some crazy old crackpot. They sold the house & moved last year (thank goodness), and we found out later they'd divorced & apparently had some pretty big financial issues. I guess maybe it was the stress of what was going on in his life, just taking it out on us.
Birds Don't Pay Taxes[rebelmouse-image 18345453 is_animated_gif=
This is so dumb. My neighbor got pissed that I hung up a bird feeder on my property, stating it attracted birds. I said "well that's the point", to which he goes on a tirade about how he pays taxes and the birds don't, and that they were destroying his house blah blah blah. This is all well and good until I just stopped responding to him and he brings up my ex girlfriend by saying "No wonder that lady moved out". It was an amicable breakup so this was not an ok thing to say on many levels.
I resisted the urge to punch him right then and there and calmly got into my car. Drove to the nearest Lowes, and bought a few more bird feeders to hang all around my property. I glared at him the whole time I was installing them. It's been two years, and he hasn't spoken to me since.
I had never had a problem with him before that, and I rarely even converse with my neighbors because I normally keep to myself.
Some people truly think the world revolves around them, which is why it's so satisfying to see them get what they want.
Consider: When was the last time you saw someone in public freak out in a store and demand to speak to the manager? Did the manager acquiese? Or did they stand up for their employees?
We're used to hearing about employees getting the short end of the stick, of course. But the moments when things go the other way—and a terrible nuisance finds themselves unable to get what they want—is truly a sight to behold.
In short: Saying "no" or putting people in their place is the ultimate power move.
People shared their stories with us after Redditor sormatodor asked the online community,
"What was the best 'you have no power here' moment you have ever seen?"
"The other evening..."
"This is a bit silly, but gave me a great feeling of satisfaction. Due to the bad economy and poor money management, my parents have moved into the spare room of the house my husband and I bought a year ago. Things are mostly smooth, tho I'm not the closest to them for several reasons I won't go into here."
"The other evening I was out gardening (because it's hot during the day and we have the luck of having a streetlight right next to our front yard, keeping it pretty well illuminated even after sundown, I mostly garden at night), and I thought I had gotten the hose twisted, as it kept getting stuck."
"This went on for a bit, when I realized that it wasn't stuck, but being pulled. I looked into the dim area just past the illumination of the street light and spied my father, crouched over and tugging the hose. Well I did the only reasonable thing to do, and I sprayed him. He yelled and ran inside with me chasing."
"Once he got inside he made a face and goes "You can't get me now! I'm inside!!" In that father-to-daughter-don't-you-make-a-mess tone of voice."
"I readied my hose, looked him in the eye and said, "It's my house." And just let loose with the hose. He was soaked. Worth cleaning up the mess for that moment of true fear in his eyes."
This story definitely made our day better!
"I used to work..."
"I used to work for a super nasty manager when I worked at McDonalds. This guy was horrible to us. He was constantly bullying us, s*it talking us TO CUSTOMERS, and doing everything in his power to make us miserable. Well, so many people complained about him that he ended up getting fired."
"New manager was great. He was super chill and understanding with us all. A couple weeks after he took over, the old guy comes in and starts talking about how terrible the store looks, how our service is worse than ever, and how much this store needs him. The new manager looked at him and said "If you don't leave, then the cops are gonna make you.""
"When the guy didn't move, new awesome manager stuck to his guns and called the cops. The dude is no longer allowed on ANY McDonalds property in the city and has a restraining order against him."
Wow, that is definitely a power move. So much for that guy. How embarrassing.
"And walked out."
"The first time I had dinner at my parents house after I got my own apartment. My dad was giving me grief as usual. Finally, I stood up and said, “ I don’t live here anymore. I don’t have to put up with you this way any longer. I’m going home.”
"And walked out."
"Most liberating moment of my life."
We're proud of you! Well done. Set those boundaries!
"Anticipating his next move..."
"I worked in management at a theatre for a while. If the concession counter was slammed and I was able, I'd leave my post and help them sling popcorn."
"One night while helping out, a particularly belligerent man started cussing out a 16 year old girl on a cash register for being too slow, even suggesting she quit since she clearly couldn't handle pushing buttons or scooping popcorn."
"It was pretty disgusting and I felt so bad for the girl, I stepped in and told the guy that our employees have the right to refuse service to customers who harass them as part of our anti-harassment/discrimination policy, empathized that the lines were longer than usual, and suggested he should apologize and move on. He was PISSED."
"Left half his order on the counter and started fuming off."
"Anticipating his next move, I went back to my original post that night - as manager of the customer service kiosk. Oh boy, the look on his face when he saw me. (Didn't want a refund of his tickets though so I assume he watched the movie, without popcorn)."
Sounds like you were a good girl. That teenage girl definitely appreciated you for sticking up for her!
"When an unhappy client..."
"When an unhappy client threatens to go hire a better lawyer. They don't seem to get that this isn't a threat when they aren't paying me..."
Okay, there's the door. At the end of the day, you have a choice: Money or peace of mind? Your peace of mind will thank you every time.
"I told my ex..."
"I told my ex I was getting remarried. He told me he was going to stop me and put a lein on my house (which I bought with my money six years after the divorce). My son would come home from visitations telling me how his dad was going to stop the wedding and I'd have to pay him all of this money, la di da."
"Get to court. His attorney goes blah blah blah for what felt like forever. My lawyer (yes, I had to freaking get one) stands up and simply hands the judge the divorce papers showing the disbursement of funds and how my ex isn't owed anything."
"Judge looks at ex's lawyer and basically asks, "did you even ask for this document before filing?" and dismisses the case."
Did you get court costs? Any solution for his attempt at alienating your son? Hope it's better now.
"So my biological grandmother..."
"Not me, but a story my dad used to tell me all the time."
"So my biological grandmother was very emotionally abusive. She was very controlling and tried to keep people within her sphere of influence. There's a reason why my grandfather divorced her."
"In high school my dad had a job washing airplanes at an airport in our area, which he absolutely loved (he's a huge fan of aircraft in general). He had classes until roughly 10 am and then he'd be off to work until around 10 pm (it was what he loved, he didn't mind long hours being around aircraft all day)."
"But one day he came home a little too late for his mom's liking. She said she'd take his keys to his motorcycle and that he'd lost privileges to it."
"The fact of the matter is that he bought the motorcycle himself and he needed it to get to school as well as work. He laughed in her face and she didn't do anything. She couldn't do anything."
Your dad sounds like the cool loner from an '80s high school movie.
"When I got back..."
"I work for a trampoline park franchise. We opened a sister location that I ran for about a year and a half before moving back to take over the old location."
"When I got back, a lot needed fixing but in particular there were 2 teenage employees that had been fired/suspended on numerous occasions. They were generally lazy, rude jackasses that shouldn’t have been hired in the first place. Problem was, they both had aggressive helicopter moms that intimidated the manager into rescinding any punishments."
"Once I came back, I took stock of our employees and had a long talk with the entire leadership team. I learned which employees caused which problems, who was unreliable, who had a regular habit of skipping shifts, texting on shift, etc. I fired about a half dozen that first week, including those two I mentioned."
"That night, both moms called my personal cell to scream at me (our numbers are listed in the online scheduling tool so employees can find shift covers more easily). They demanded to know why I fired them, threatened to sue, have me arrested, accused me of discrimination (against their white middle-class sons), etc."
"I simply asked, “Is your son over 18? Yes? So you’re demanding I illegally release personal information regarding a former adult employee? Bye.""
That's the way to do it!
The nerve of some people... especially parents who think their kids should bear no responsibility for their own actions.
There's something really satisfying about telling people like this off. If you've ever worked in customer service of any kind—especially in retail or in restaurants—then you know how satisfying it can be to tell the worst people "no."
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
Considering how much money these films make, I understand that I am in the minority when I say that Marvel films have absolutely overstayed their welcome. What once seemed fairly innovative—the current generation of the MCU really took off when Iron Man proved to be a tremendous hit—now feels stale.
I accept it, though. These films are not for me and never have been. That's okay. But it'd be great if we could have more room for other great blockbuster films other than yet another superhero movie.
People shared their thoughts with us after Redditor Ziggi28 asked the online community,
"What franchise has been milked to death?"
"MTVs Teen Mom. Although they still act like teenagers, the moms are in their 30s."
Part of me thinks the only reason it's still on is because MTV knows several of the cast members have no other way to make money and they're waiting to see if any of the kids become teen parents.
All of Them
"A better question would be what franchise HASN'T been milked to death. Something like 9 out of 10 "blockbusters" these days are remakes/sequels/rehashes etc."
If we have to have nonstop remakes, I wish they’d at least make good remakes of bad movies/shows that had potential but were poorly executed for whatever reason, instead of mediocre at best remakes of classics.
It's a "No" for Netflix
"Certainly nothing netflix has created. Get hooked on a show with solid potential and bam....its canceled."
Netflix’s Dark Crystal amazingly resurrected a Jim Henson masterpiece, set up an entire world to explore, and cancelled it after one season.
"Is the next Halloween really going to be the last one or no?"
Don't forget, guys: Evil dies tonight!
We'll repeat it 10,000 times just so you know for sure.
Friday the 13th
"When Jason started killing in Manhattan, possessing people’s bodies, and killing on a futuristic spaceship in outer space, I felt the Friday the 13th series was getting a bit ridiculous. Although Jason X wasn’t that bad."
Honestly, the franchise died with Jason X. The remake of the first—which actually combined the plots of the first four films—was actually pretty good but didn't go anywhere after that.
"Ben 10. I enjoyed the first 3 shows, 4th one is mixed for me, but that 5th show which is that reboot that came after was unnecessary and just shows that Cartoon Network is reliant on making money from toy sales rather than telling a good story from that reboot."
There were more than two? This is news to me.
The Walking Dead
"The Walking Dead. I stopped watching when I found myself actively hoping the protagonists would be killed in gruesome ways."
I stopped after Beth died, didn't watch it for a long time, went back to it—though I started from the beginning—and gave up right when Glen was killed. It was exhausting and a meandering mess all in all.
"I just got an ad for the Jurassic World: Dominion extended edition. Pretty sure nobody has been asking for more runtime of that movie."
That movie had no reason to be as long as it is and Laura Dern and Sam Neil are really slumming it.
90 Day Fiancé
"90 Day Fiancé."
"There must be like 20 spinoffs from that show, including Pillow Talk (which has former cast members commenting on episodes) and then a Pillow Talk for the Pillow Talk episodes. Not to mention the individual spin offs like The Family Chantel and Darcey & Stacey."
I can't believe this is still on. I must be dreaming.
"Grey's Anatomy. It’s so repetitive and just ridiculous now. I gave up in season 10, then tried again and caught up a few seasons but it’s just kind of relentless, ruins good characters and rapidly churns out new, forgettable ones."
This should is the definition of a soap opera. And to think it was once a big Emmy contender for a few years!
Admit it: You're so over these too, aren't you? We might as well be living in a time loop because some of these franchises keep coming back over... and over... and over...
Have some thoughts of your own? Feel free to share them with us in the comments below!
We've all displayed embarrassing behavior or actions at one point or another, and we can't seem to shake off the regretful moment.
It just replays in our minds like an endless boomerang.
We are equally embarrassed for those who may have done something spontaneously foolish and have no clue of the mortifying impact of their actions.
It's called cringe, and strangers online had plenty to say about the all-too-familiar phenomenon when Redditor brownGoddess01 asked:
"What is something you find REALLY cringe?"
There is a time and place for things. That doesn't mean the unspoken rule is broken.
"A disastrous engagement during someone else's wedding."
"This happened at my cousins wedding. My other cousin was proposed to by her bf during the reception. The cousin getting married eventually got a divorce and the cousin who was proposed to never got married. My grandma went to her grave calling the guy who did the proposal 'El Diablo.'”
Inappropriate Declaration Of Love
"I used to work wedding receptions. One time during the speeches I witnessed the best friend of the bride profess his love to her, in front of the groom and everybody. It was one of the most awkward/cringiest moments I’ve ever witnessed."
There are some things we do that we can't take back.
How Far We've Come
"my past self."
"That means you’ve grown. Respect."
The Moment We'd Like To Forget
"My mind randomly replaying an embarrassing moment I've done that I want to forget."
"Listening my recorded voice."
Some people love living their lives on camera. Some participants don't have a say in the matter. And others just don't wanna see it.
All The World Is A Stage
"Family bloggers. Constantly having your life recorded as a child can really f'k you up. Especially since a lot of the time the parents are just using their children for content."
"I will extend this to normal people who post every second of their child’s lives, they often hide under ‘it’s so my family can see it’ but it’s not really, is it? Or else you’d have an account just for family not your 900 additional ‘friends’"
Crying You A River
"Recording yourself crying on social media."
"when individuals share sobbing selfies. No joke, when my friend's sister and her children put their dog to die, she tweeted selfies of them both crying. and the deceased dog."
"Like, is it a private moment of mourning and not a chance for a selfie?"
"All these 'prank' videos getting millions of views."
"Edit: To be specific, I’m referring to 'prank' videos that are clearly staged."
Unsolicited Life Coach
"People whose lives are an absolute self-induced disaster and post selfies with motivational quotes telling other people how to think and live."
Being in the entertainment industry and knowing how humbling it is when there are more rejections than there are bookings, we tend to be our own worst critics.
So there's nothing more cringey than revisiting an old recording of myself performing at a high school talent show when my interest in theater was fresh and exciting and I already thought I was a pro.
Unfortunately for teenage me, I was blissfully unaware I had ways to go before honing my craft.
Let's just say that all those old VHS recordings of me performing an imitation of Michael Crawford as the Phantom of the Opera need to be burned.
Sex. It's great, but there can be a lot of drama involved.
We're human, how could there not be?
One way to make it easy is to say the right name when you're in the heat of things.
Seriously, we know this sounds like a small thing, but it's monumentally important.
Make sure you know your date's name.
If you don't, take your date to Starbucks and have it written on their cup.
It might be REALLY important later in the evening.
Redditor throwaway2356765 wanted to know your best excuses in the worst moments of intimacy.
"How do you apologize to your girlfriend after accidentally calling her by your ex’s name during sex?"
Sex makes our minds crazy. I say all sorts of nonsense.
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"Burn the house down. Fake your death. Move to Peru. There's no recovery."
"You're gonna have to run out the clock on that one. Just say you're sorry and take the consequences."
"Yup. Persistence is key. Apologize a thousand times until she forgives you. Cook her favorite meals a thousand times until she forgives you. Massage her back a thousand times until she forgives you."
"'I'm so sorry [Ex's Name].' Trust me it'll work."
"Unironically maybe if you can convince her you have early onset dementia."
"Call out a guy's name next time and really throw her for a loop."
"Call out your own name."
"Or her father's name."DZLars
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"Call out Kermit’s name next time."
Sex makes us all crazy.
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"Oh man, trust me as someone who calls everyone by another person's name... there is no amount of apologies to make up for that in this case. Just hope she cares enough to forgive - she won't forget though and may bring it up many times."
"Not sure, but if it helps to know, I accidentally called my wife our dog’s name during an argument."
"Update: It totally killed the tension, and we laughed about it. I am safe."
"I just had a baby and now no one’s name is sacred in my house. Every cat’s, dog’s, or human’s name is Interchangeable with the others."
"Tell her you called her name while having sex with your ex and you're just trying to even everything out."
"Perfectly balanced, as all things should be."
"Just say you're sorry and you didn't mean it, but don't expect that she will get over it easily."'
"This seems like the most sensible answer. My answer was basically grovelling, grovel and grovel some more and hope she can forgive you but don't expect that to happen right away but definitely expect to hear it in every argument for a few years to come as well."
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"The only way to salvage this is at the time by adding ' ...was never this good!'"
Be better y'all. It's an intimate moment and your partner deserves the basest level of respect that come with knowing their name.
Do you have other ideas to share in the unfortunate event of this happening? Let us know in the comments below.