Recovering Alcoholic's Wife Throws Out His Expensive Bottle Of Maple Syrup, And The Internet Is Understandably Divided
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When one of your loved ones is a recovering addict, you may feel like you have to take extra precautions around them to avoid any potential triggers.

But in this particular couple's case, the wife was more triggered by the steps her husband was choosing to take in his recovery.


The husband in this situation is a recovering alcoholic who has been sober for nine months after attending his AA meetings twice per week throughout his journey.

While shopping at Costco, he was looking for a new bottle of maple syrup and discovered a very interesting option. It was an all-natural maple syrup that had been made in bourbon casks, which meant it had no alcohol in it, but it carried with it the bourbon flavor. The bottle also, instead of being in the traditional shape of a maple syrup bottle, was made to look like a classic bottle of bourbon.

But when his wife saw his purchase in the cupboard, she was immensely triggered and ended up dumping the bottle out.

Reddit user "watkinobe" posted to the "Am I The A$hole" subReddit, to see if people agreed with his feeling that his wife was overreacting to his choice of maple syrup.

You can read the full story here:

Reddit was wholeheartedly divided on the matter. Some understood the man's interest in maple syrup itself and agreed that his wife overreacted.

Most saw the selection moreso as an opportunity for a "dry drunk" to continue enjoying alcoholic flavor, thus not fully committing to the process of staying sober.

"I've heard that just the flavor alone can trigger a relapse, so it is careful grounds to climb. You have a wife who obviously loves you to the moon and back and is looking out for your best interests, despite her over-zealous manner in which it was done."
"A piece of unsolicited advice - go to her and thank her for looking out for you as well as she is, and apologize for not realizing to what extent you put her through. Hopefully she will soften up. Trust, once broken, is hard to rebuild." - ActofEncouragement
"Yes the syrup won't have the effect of alcohol. However, you clearly enjoy it and it could be one of the best parts of your day (sometimes the day just goes downhill from the start). That pleasant association with something that tastes of bourbon- that's a realistic threat to your sobriety. At this point why risk it."
"Apologize to her, take a bunch of flowers and buy regular syrup and her favorite sweet treat. Yes she should trust you, but trust has to be re-established. She obviously loves you. Congratulations on your progress, do your best to protect it- good luck" - abrookman1987

More sympathized with the man's wife, explaining how she was clearly triggered in this situation after the drinking that nearly broke up their marriage.

"ESH, but softly. I'm not sure how long you were an actively drinking alcoholic, but it was obviously long enough that your wife is a short step away from being %100 done with your s**t. She was clearly triggered by this, and overreacted."
"But you're really under-reacting to how traumatic and infuriating it is to love an alcoholic, especially if this is not the first shot at recovery you've had. You both need to communicate better. If that means you have to buy non-bourbon flavored maple syrup then that's probably what you should do." - deathoftheotter
"It may have looked to the wife that OP wasn't seriously committed to long-term sobriety; that he'd gone to AA to placate her and keep his life from completely unraveling, but is now starting to look for loopholes and subtle ways to go back to his old ways without technically breaking the rules, and that this was going to be the first in a long series of boundary-pushing."
"Maybe that's a stretch, maybe that didn't go through her head at all, but it wouldn't have surprised me if that's at least a part of why she was so upset." - 2_headed_cat

In the end, the husband returned to his post and added a "thank you" note at the end for all who had commented, and stated he would be more sensitive to his wife's needs during their journey together going forward.

While it's understandable why he may have wanted to try a new product from the store, it's also completely understandable how this could be a slippery slope for someone struggling with their alcoholism, and how one of their loved ones could be triggered by such a choice.

Everyone always harps on the importance of first impressions.

But we also need to pay attention to all that follows.

I'm starting to believe a first impression can be a great fake-out.

People will allow their true colors to shine over time.

Redditor Xanax_Sprite wanted everyone to open up about what things people can do that immediately change one's opinion of a person's character, not for the better.

They asked:

"What immediately makes you think less of someone?"

It's entirely too easy to turn me off. I admit, it's an issue. Maybe that's a thing people suddenly dislike about me.

Bad Behavior

rude bon qui qui GIFGiphy

"Intentional embarrassment. When someone brings something up in front of a group to humiliate someone else."

mr_xen_

Man Up

"Not taking responsibility for their actions."

DragonVash

"Even worse. people who make excuses for their mistakes, no matter how bluntly you point it out to them that this is their shortcoming. Man up and admit you make a mistake. Stop telling me A happened then B happened so C happened. we are here to work, not tell each other make believe stories."

Chomusuke_99

Be Quiet

"Someone who interrupts a serious conversation to make it about them."

-Zuine-

"Being subject to that infuriating s**t was what eventually inspired me to listen to people more, especially regarding heavier topics. Sometimes people just need to be heard and held, and it isn't fair for them to expose their vulnerabilities only to have you dismiss them by trying to make their suffering about you."

I_Consume_Shampoo

Where are they?

"How they speak about a person who is not present in the conversation."

weirdlikenick

"One of the most important lessons my father taught me..."

"Don't speak about a person if they're not in the room."

"They don't have a representative in the room and especially if your words get back to them and they can't say 'I know, he already had that convo with me.' I've earned a rep for not speaking behind people's backs to the point where when someone claimed I did, that person called them a liar. Pops sucked but I thank him for that lesson."

thatswhatshesaidxx

Be Consistent

Jennifer Lawrence Reaction GIFGiphy

"Hypocrites."

silentsurge95

"100. People can change their opinions, but not flip flop regularly."

0rd0abCha0

I can't with hypocrites. My life's biggest pet peeve.

Be clean

Season 4 Episode 22 GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

"Littering."

Miniturbo23

"Yep, had a coworker once who spit on the floor inside."

"It was a warehouse-type building, but still. This particular guy also left cigarette butts on the floor inside and dumped a dog on the business property. Needless to say, he didn't last long here. Some people are just really rude and stupid."

UnderstatedEssence

Say Sorry

"Had a friend who never, ever apologized for anything or really took any responsibility. Even in situations which were funny and non-serious, he’d always talk his a** out of it (in a jokey matter). But when some s**t hit the fan, that guy turned into one of the scariest, manipulative and aggressive people I’ve met that would rather die than take accountability for the things he’s done."

"And for which there were many witnesses and evidence against him. Moral of the story, if you know someone who won’t say sorry or admit they did something wrong for even the least serious things, run, because when they actually do something seriously bad it’s just gonna get real ugly."

confused-girly

Face 2 Face

"Lying to my face. There’s no going back in my eyes because I will never trust you. Secrets are fine and dandy. That’s not quite the same as straight up lying. A direct example is people lying about their family dying to get out of work or when this older woman in her 40’s tried to lie about cleaning up her work station when she left it for me to clean."

brazosandbosque

“as a joke”

"Being mean to animals."

Catatonia86

"Even when people joke about being mean to animals. I have a cat I love dearly and the number of comments I get about harming cats because people don’t like them 'as a joke' is infuriating and not funny, Ken."

indiscreetraven

"I include poorly training their pets in this. It’s neglect/negligence and it’s abuse."

baby_*itchface

Eyes Up

Call Me Lol GIF by Black PrezGiphy

"When they’re looking at their phones, not paying any attention to you when you’re trying to have a conversation with them."

Beedalabupp

It doesn't take much to change an impression. Let's do better.

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