Woman's BF of Three Years Refuses To Meet Her Parents, Wonders If He's Gaslighting Her
A natural next step in a relationship is involving blood family. Even if they can be a source of stress, it really has stuck itself in our society as a rite of passage. So what do you do when it's looking like your boyfriend of 3 years doesn't want to take that step?
u/spammymonkey laid out the situation for us:
My (26F) boyfriend (28M) refuses to meet my parents. We have been dating for three years.
So I've been dating this guy for three years and you'd think we would already make the step to meeting each other's families. I will also add that we have been living long distance for about two years but I see him for extended periods of time about six times a year.
I haven't met his family yet. He hasn't met mine. Everytime I bring up the topic he gets defensive and refuses to do so. He's normally a pretty private person.
His reasoning is that he likes to spend time with me as an escape from all the other people he has to talk to in his job. And meeting my parents is disturbing the status quo. Is this normal? I'm thinking of ending it but I'm having a really hard time. I would like to be mature about the whole situation, and have tried to talk to him but he doesn't want to.
TL;DR boyfriend of three years doesn't want to meet my parents and he refuses to talk about it.
Here was some of the advice she got.
One
GiphyThere are 2 scenarios here:
- His family is abusive or something along those lines and isn't really big on the whole meeting the family ordeal
- He's keeping you secret and doesn't want people to know about you (not saying he's cheating or something but I have seen those instances)
Either way he needs to give you a proper reason. Relationships are about compromise. He should be willing to meet your family for you but you don't have to see his family if he doesn't want.
So communicate with him basically.
Two
Hmm. This is tough not knowing more about the situation. My gut reaction is something is up. I have a friend where this happened- his girlfriend just never brought him around her family and they were together for years. She had a medical emergency and when he called her parents to tell her, they had no idea who he was. Turns out she had another boyfriend and that's why she never told her parents about him.
I think his reason is bs- this is life and you gotta talk to people. "Disturbing the status quo" is some crap too. There is something fishy going on here, and I would tell him that he needs to explain himself or you're done.
Three
he likes to spend time with me as an escape from all the other people he has to talk to
That's not what a relationship is meant to be. A relationship isn't an escape from real life, it is a part of your life. A partner is someone that joins you for family events, for social events, maybe even work functions. Your boyfriend doesn't see you like this. Maybe he has another girlfriend, maybe he doesn't, but either way, he sees you as something separate to his life. And that's not fair. You are more than just a hobby to provide him with stress relief. You are someone who wants to comingle your lives together, which is 100% normal after 3 years!
Time to be done with this relationship. It's not going anywhere.
Four
So everyone's jumping to the idea that you're his side piece or at best someone he sees as a casual fling which, yeah, does sound very possible.
But even if that's not true, this is a really reasonable dealbreaker! I couldn't deal with it, and I'd absolutely dump him if I were you. My boyfriend is a bit resistant about family stuff (his family history is...complicated), and even that gets tiring for me to deal with sometimes, although I understand and respect where he's coming from and he does come with me when it's important.
I hope he'll eventually become more open to joining me for family stuff, but I'm 100% okay if he doesn't because he's still there for the big stuff. I could never build a life with someone who refused to even meet my family, and after 3 years that's what you're doing. So who even cares if he has a secret wife or whatever? If your parents are important to you, and he refuses to even discuss meeting him, cut him loose.
Five
GiphyUmm. I would recommend reading your post and your answers as another person and think about what advice you would give your friend if she came to you with this issue.
It seems that he doesn't see a future with you, which is why he refuses to answer your question about the future. If he says no future since you are only a temporary thing for him, then you will break up with him, but if he gives no answer and strings you along, then he can get laid in the meantime and then dump you when he is ready to find the person he wants to settle down with.
Thats why he hasn't introduced you to family. No point in going through all that for someone that will be a free agent soon.
Six
It's fine if he sees you as an escape and doesn't want to disturb the status quo, but unless that's the way you want your relationship to remain then I think it's time to bail. He's basically telling you that he likes to date you but doesn't ever see the need to go further or do more... which is fine for some people and doesn't make him a bad person, but it may mean you're incompatible if you want more than that. And if you do want more than that, then go find that because you're not going to get it from him.
Seven
I suspect he's hiding you for some reason, or he has a poor relationship with his family and isn't really big on the whole family thing in general. No matter the reason, if you want a partner who is family-oriented then this might not be the guy for you. After three years in a relationship, things are usually getting pretty long term serious and not communicating his thoughts about this to you is quite frankly unacceptable. Imagine potentially attending family holiday gatherings on your own forever while he does his own thing.
I dated someone about five years who was the ladder. He met my parents maybe 2-3 times, and would make excuses for why he needed to go home early and to not attend family events with me. He also avoided spending time with his own family on holidays. It just wasn't important to him, even though it was extremely important to me.
Eight
I am very sympathetic to someone not wanting you to meet their parents, as long as they explain why. People have different relationships with their parents. My partner only met my parents a week before we moved in together.
However, if you want them to meet your parents, and you express that it is important to you, it is really not normal or ok for your partner to refuse (barring extremely unusual circumstances).
Nine
For all you wrote, I still don't have any sense of who he is. He works, included you in work functions, and you see each other now and then. What kind of person is he, what does he hope for, what are his friends like, do you imagine future things together?
He sees you as an escape: What, like a relief valve for his real life, instead of someone he wants to bring into that life? Can you find out what he's "escaping" from? Family expectations, his main girlfriend, or having to grow up?
He is very private, doesn't share much: Maybe his family's intrusive, maybe he doesn't have a lot of thoughts to share, maybe he doesn't want deeper connections?
Not wanting you to meet his family: Could be they don't have a good relationship. Or they'll assume it means he's serious about you, but he isn't and wants to put off telling you.
It might ease his mind to tell him that meeting them is off the agenda for now. What's more important is if he'll tolerate talking about your future, what his family's like, etc. Normal things.
Ten
GiphyYes, it's weird as hell and a red flag for a number of reasons. It's not normal to want to keep everyone in their own place separate from anyone else in your life. This speaks to, at best, emotional or psychological issues that he should be addressing in therapy. At worst it means he's doing things that he feels he needs to hide from a variety of people, so he keeps everyone compartmented away so no one will compare notes or trip up his careful narratives.
And even if it's not anything sinister like another woman or the fact he has something big to hide from you and lots of people, even if it's that he doesn't see you as anything but Ms. Right Now instead of Ms. Right until she comes along, the fact is you cannot have a full relationship with someone who sees you only as an "escape." You should not be placed in the same category as a bottle of booze or an entertainment center or a fun night out to get away from things, which is kind of what his description and insistence of your role has placed you.
It's also really kind of controlling in a very disturbing way. I mean, if he didn't want you to meet his parents due to some trauma I can understand that. But you still have a partner who at three years feels comfortable enough to tell you at least, "hey, my parents are abusive POS that I want nothing to do with, so we are not meeting them. Ever." BUT he also does not want to meet your parents and by the sounds of it also avoids meeting anyone else in your life and vice versa.
There is something wrong here. You're the secret he feels he doesn't have to share and he never will by the sounds of it. It's time to go unless you enjoy the relationship equivalent of being hidden in the attic.
Eleven
Sooooo how is your relationship supposed to move forward? Have you talked about the future? Marriage? And it's been 3 whole years? "He doesn't want to talk cuz he talks at work"....so he's just not gonna talk about anything at all???
He's not communicating. And totally pushing it off. Sounds like he likes the box he put you in in his life. If this is a relationship you want, go for it. But if you want to be more involved with your partner's life/family, this may not be the right partner.
Twelve
I once dated someone who was extremely private about his family. His parents didn't know about me, and he only talked to his dad. He bashed his family to me and said he would never go back to visit with them.
I found his dad's Facebook page after the fact. There was a photo of my former significant other with a girl he'd brought to meet his family recent to that time.
Thirteen
GiphyLate to the party here but to second a lot of other commenters, this does ring some alarm bells for me. As many here point out, he may have justifiable reasons for not introducing you to his family, however what really strikes me is that he has not met your family (I get the impression this is something you have tried to facilitate). Regardless of his issues with his own family, he should have made the effort to meet your family at your request before now, and this shows a lack of consideration that concerns me.
Fourteen
He could be extremely shy and anxious/insecure?? No doubt I think a 28 year old in a 3 year committed relationship should have enough courage to have met them at least a few times, but it is a pressure situation for some if he feels like he needs to impress them especially because procrastinating this long could add more tension. Just trying to provide a logical counter argument here because I see a lot of people getting carried away I think with out a strong feel/ base of knowledge regarding this relationship that has gone on for over 1000 days. I too am greatly removed from the situation, but felt the need to say something because I have been mistaken as toxic in my relationship before when really I was unable to show vulnerability due to my insecurities.
Fifteen
Whether or not anything "fishy" is going on, if he's refusing to meet your family after three years, he's just not that into you. By that, I mean, he's not looking for anything more serious with you and if you want something serious you should look elsewhere.
Employees At Fancy Hotels Divulge Their Best Secrets
Reddit user akumamatata8080 asked: 'People who work at super fancy hotels, what kind of stuff happens that management doesn’t want people to know about?'
Most of us who have not worked in hospitality have dreamed of having a nice getaway for a weekend, or staying in a top-rated hotel, and relaxing in one of its best suites.
But those who have worked in hospitality are ready to point out some of the unexpected features and oddities that circulate around these fancier accommodations.
Redditor akumamatata8080 asked:
"People who work at super fancy hotels, what kind of stuff happens that management doesn't want people to know about?"
Cross-Contamination
"During housekeeping, hotels use different colored cloths to wipe your drinking glasses, cutlery, toilets, and sinks to avoid contamination. They just didn’t bother separating these cloths after wiping and moving to the next room."
- curry-sauce
The Secret Lives of Guests
"I did valet at an upscale hotel in Southern Florida, and the number of times I parked luxury vehicles with drugs haphazardly or precariously stowed in obvious places always blew me away."
"Not surprisingly, those guests were great tippers as they learned who to trust."
- lazerayfraser
Attention to Detail
"We take notes on your reservation profile. Everything from anniversary information to favorite cocktails and foods. We add notes to pass along to other staff."
- dez_navi
Four-Legged Stowaways
"$2k per night and this place has a serious rat problem."
- prof_dynamite
"Could be worse. My hotel has silly rats."
- snapwillow
What in the Mortuary
"It's pretty common to have a dead guest. There's a standard procedure for it and we take care of it quietly."
- Why_am_I_here033
Casino Funds
"I have a pretty interesting one. We know criminal enterprises have funded casinos in the past. I worked at Revel Casino (now Ocean) in Atlantic City before and after its opening."
"One thing they kept mentioning in our onboarding was that the triads were funding the casino. I thought it was super strange that these execs were just openly telling brand new hires."
- hornet_Critical
Like-New Beds
"I only work as a housekeeper at a regular four-star Hotel, but probably about 25% of people either bleed or leave s**t stains on the beds. It's truly atrocious how disgusting people are, especially when they know someone else is cleaning it up. Even the wealthier guests."
"And the best tippers are the cleanest people."
"If someone fully s**t on the bed and used towels to wipe, drank heavily and puked on the carpet in multiple places, and clogged the toilet, that person will not tip at all."
"But the person who barely used the full bed and didn't use the shower at all and was super clean and polite, now that's a good tipper."
- kpo987
Endless Supply of Gossip
"We turn a blind eye to drug dealers more often than you think. They hardly complain and usually pre-pay huge bonds happily. Also, we don't give a s**t if you're having an affair."
- NotTheGary_JustGary
Odd Celebrity Stories
"I worked cooking at an ultra-exclusive resort in Utah ($3k-$12k/night)."
"Nothing that exciting happened in my year there. I found a bottle in the tallboy (large fridge) labeled 'Kristen Belle's Breastmilk. DO NOT USE.'"
"I had put in my two weeks' notice and was really drunk on a day off, and made a post on Facebook about how Gordon Ramsay was coming and I hoped he wasn't filming 'Kitchen Nightmares' with us. I was fired within 24 hours, lol (laughing out loud). I did get to cook fish tacos for him and his family, though, and I heard he complimented the dinner kitchen crew directly (partially open kitchen), which is cool."
- OM3N1R
Poor Cruise Care
"A good friend of mine is a pilot. It's his first professional job. He flies an air ambulance. It's not typically picking up unstable patients in need of urgent care. More like repositioning stable patients."
"The vast majority of people he flies come from the cruise ship industry. If you get sick or injured on a cruise ship, they will dump you at the next port. It doesn't matter if the port doesn't have the kind of medical help you need. They just need you off the ship."
"It very well is up to you to arrange a private flight with medical crew to reposition you from Tobago to Tampa to get the medical help you really need."
- DoctFaustus
Collecting Stories
"We had an entire wing of the hotel infested with bedbugs. They just move through the walls from one room to the next. We waged a war of attrition that took years, and cost a lot of money, but we never stopped renting the rooms."
"We had one old guy though who was rich, divorced several times over, he just retired in the hotel. He had a room on the ground level right around the corner from the hotel bar. I don't know what he paid for it, but it wasn't cheap, and he furnished his own room."
"Everyone on staff knew his habits, knew his drink, knew when to leave him alone or when he wanted to chat. The funniest thing was, after he passed, he'd pre-booked his memorial at a totally different hotel. He liked his privacy, I guess. RIP, Hal."
- machuitzil
Bed Bug Horror Stories
"I worked cheap hotels and this is super common; even heat treating rooms professionally and quarantining nearby rooms they would always pop up somewhere weeks later through an air duct."
"When I check in to any motel or hotel, the first thing I do before bringing my bag in is lift the mattress and check the seams for bed bugs or blood spots. You can learn how from Youtube if you don't get first-hand experience."
"The crazy thing is if they spent a few thousand to bag every mattress they'd cut down on it significantly."
- galkasmash
Wild Stories
"I worked in room service at a very chic hotel in Miami. One guest requested that a specific waitress (not a room service worker) always deliver him food. Not exactly sure what went on in there, but he tipped her with a big bag of weed each time, which she would promptly bring back to share with the room service staff."
"I can confirm that the concierge will get you WHATEVER you want..."
"We had a local couple, who were staying with us to avoid being served for a lawsuit. We weren't allowed to say that they were staying there. The police eventually showed up for them."
"There were several times when guests would come to the front desk claiming the maids had stolen something from their room. They would be irate, demanding we call the police. Every. Single. Time. They found the item either in their luggage or car or their travel companions had moved/packed the item."
"One gentleman claimed that he forgot his very expensive camera in his room. My manager pulled up a video that showed him packing up his car, placing the camera on top of the car, and driving off without realizing it."
- SnarkyVamp
Questionable Christmas Bonus
"I used to work in accounts receivable for a couple of luxury hotels that were owned by the same LLC. We would open blocks of rooms for GENERIC SPORTS SEASON about eight months in advance."
"Due to high demand, these reservations had to be a two-day FRI, SAT stay. The payment was made in full (450-800 depending on room type). Refunds were available only if you canceled a month before the arrival date."
"When I first started in the position, I discovered $63,000 worth of reservations that had been canceled on time but were never refunded."
"I showed it to my manager, an absolutely incompetent woman who couldn't check in a guest if she needed to, she got back to me after discussing it with one of the owners."
"I can't remember how exactly she put it but I was told to just forget the matter and not to mention it to anyone. I got a $500 dollar cash Christmas bonus that year."
- Weirda**mustache
Secret Security
"Not a hotel employee, but associated with a popular convention that everyone would recognize."
"The convention attendees get so out of control that the hotel will only host the convention if they have a private security force."
"Since the private security isn't law enforcement or licensed, they do pretty much whatever it takes to keep trouble out of the public eye. Mostly it's locking people up in rooms or escorting them out of town, but they can get rough at times."
"But none of the convention attendees know they are there and the hotel staff pretends they don't see them. Even those who run afoul of them don't know exactly who it was that grabbed them."
- rusty0123
While everyone might think that staying at a fancy hotel would be great fun, it may not be such an enjoyable experience for those who work there. With all kinds of questionable behaviors performed by guests, not to mention the messes that need to be cleaned up, that fancy hotel may not feel so fancy for very long.
While we may not all enjoy studying history, we all have certain types of stories that interest us, and one that seems to catch everyone's attention are the hard-to-believe, almost far-fetched tales.
Interestingly enough, history is full of these stories, leaving many to believe that reality is truly stranger than fiction.
Redditor ThrowAwayMyLife2341 asked:
"What are some events in recorded history that are extremely hard to believe, but without a doubt actually happened?"
Second Chance Flight
"My colleague was on the plane to Hawaii where the entire top of the plane ripped off… they flew the rest of the way without any overhead."
"They landed and everyone walked off. It's absolutely insane to see the pictures. Talk about being given a second chance."
- SkydivingSquid
Running Late for the Olympics
"In 1908, Russia showed up 12 days late to the Olympics because the world switched calendars while they did not."
- drailCA
"To accommodate the Russian team, some events were rescheduled so that the Russian athletes could participate. This led to a longer duration for those Olympics, which lasted from April 27 to October 31, making it the longest Olympic Games in history."
- parkerjh
An Inescapable War
"The Battle of Bull Run, one of the first battles of the US Civil War, occurred on and around Wilmer McClean's farm in Northern Virginia. Not wanting to live surrounded by war, McClean and his family moved to Appomattox Courthouse, Virginia."
"The Battle of Appomattox Courthouse was the last significant battle between Union and Confederate forces. The Confederates signed the surrender order in Wilmer's sitting room."
"It is said that the Civil War started on Wilmer's farm and ended in his sitting room."
- csudebate
History of Bombings
"There was a Japanese man called Tsutomu Yamaguchi who was on his way to work in Hiroshima in 1945, when he saw falling through the sky, two miles from where he stood, what ultimately turned out to be the atomic bomb."
"He had just enough time to take cover in a ditch as the bomb detonated and miraculously he survived. Somehow the Hiroshima train station was still operational and so Yamaguchi, battered, bombed and bruised, decided to board a train to his family home so he could recover... in Nagasaki."
"Three days later, Yamaguchi was called into work to explain what he saw, which he did. At work, as he began to tell the story of what happened, the second bomb dropped."
"It was the reinforced concrete walls around him that saved him this time, and Yamaguchi quickly ran to find his wife and son. Ground temperatures in the city reached 4,000°C and radioactive rain poured down."
"The family's home was destroyed, but Yamaguchi's wife and son had thankfully been out shopping - looking for burn ointment for Yamaguchi, when the bomb fell, and they'd survived."
"Despite this ordeal of having survived two nuclear explosions and subsequent radiation exposure, Yamaguchi went on to live till 93 yrs of age. He died in 2010 after being recognized by the Japanese government as a 'nijyuu hibakusha,' or 'twice-bombed person.'"
- Voodizzy_
A Monumental Fall
"Nicholas Alkemade fell 18,000 feet without a parachute from a burning plane in 1944 and suffered no serious injury."
- hazps
"I see how the snow cover helped but how he didn’t get skewered by pine trees or break a single bone is shocking."
- switchbladeeatworld
"Imagine what he was thinking when he got up from that fall. What kind of crazy thoughts were running through his head."
- Lankey_Craig
"'Yeah, no one is gonna believe this one.'"
- Pennywise626
"Germans almost didn't, after finding him in just a flight suit but no parachute. They initially pegged him as a spy who'd been dropped behind their lines and had stashed his chute and gear. As such, he was likely to be executed."
"Except Alkemade was so insistent his captors went and found the wreckage of his aircraft, with the burnt remains of his chute stashed behind his gun position. Germans told him the news and shared vodka with him to celebrate."
- JohnnyJohnCowboyMan
Mass Dance in France
"That time everyone died of a dancing sickness where they danced themselves to death in France. Mass hysteria."
- DavinaCole
"St. Vitus’ Dance, as it is called, still doesn’t have a definitely known cause."
"New research as of 2021 shows Sydenham chorea as the most likely cause."
- ENFJPLinguaphile
The Return of the Sun
"The Battle of Halys."
"In roughly 6th century BC, the Medes and the Lydians were at war. The war had lasted for six years and climaxed at the Battle of Halys."
"During the battle, a solar eclipse began. Both sides believed that the Gods were angry at their long and bloody war, and were taking the sun away from them."
"They declared peace that day, and the sun was returned. But yeah, a war ended because of a solar eclipse."
- TheRogueBear
A Spicy Battle
"The Nutmeg Wars. The Dutch and the English went to war THREE times over nutmeg, which at the time was only known to grow on one South Pacific island."
- missoularedhead
Entertaining Prisoners
"Theodore Roosevelt found his boat was stolen. So he built a new boat, tracked the thieves down, and arrested them."
"He then proceeded to walk them multiple days, without sleeping, so they could receive a trial instead of just shooting them on the spot."
"It was in the middle of a harsh winter so he didn’t handcuff them (for fear they’d get frostbite), so instead, he just kept himself awake by reading Tolstoy with a gun trained on them the whole trek."
- Another_Road
"That's only the twenty-second most Teddy thing I've ever read, but a new one, which makes me love it."
- Beard_of_Valor
"I am always half convinced that Teddy Roosevelt was not a real person. No one could have been that absolutely wild and done that many things, but there is just too much overwhelming proof."
- LeSilverKitsune
Christmas Day 1914
"Christmas day 1914. The truce on the WW1 battlefields."
"It shows the humanity inside everyone, but they were able to wake up the next day and go straight back to war, kill the men that they’d spent a sincere day with."
- PotterWhoLock01
Honoring Everyone's Dead
"I can't remember where I saw/heard the story of Christmas Day 1914 (I think from the BBC), but I believe from one of the last-living Tommys, who said that whilst they were forced to start shooting at each other, the majority of shots intentionally missed, from both sides of no man's land."
"I believe it was also the same man who said, in reference to Remembrance Day, to also remember the Germans. That stuck with me. They were like our lads; sent out to fight a war for war's sake, forced to do unspeakable things to other men because some higher-up told them they had to."
- The_Gene_Genie
"Australia is a bit like this with regard to the Turks on ANZAC Day."
"One of the main ceremonies is reading the letter from Turkish commander and later founder of modern Turkey, Kemal Atatürk:"
"'Those heroes that shed their blood and lost their lives... you are now lying in the soil of a friendly country. Therefore, rest in peace. There is no difference between the Johnnies and the Mehmets to us where they lie side by side here in this country of ours...'"
"'You, the mothers who sent their sons from far away countries wipe away your tears. Your sons are now lying in our bosom and are in peace. After having lost their lives on this land they have become our sons, as well.'"
- Zebidee
The Medical Church
"In 1944, during the allied invasion of France, 2 American paramedics, Ken Moore and Robert Wright, 101st Airborne, saved around 80 soldiers of both sides, allied and axis. They set themselves up in a church, had only what was in their first aid kits and medic bags, and had a strict no-gun policy."
"The church was almost destroyed by a mortar shell, but it didn’t go off. It was almost destroyed again, due to friendly fire. Ken Moore would risk his life by venturing out of the church and finding injured soldiers, and both medics stayed behind at the church, even though the rest of their forces had to retreat. Wright took on the responsibility of looking after the soldiers."
"The church still stands in Angoville-au-Plain, France, the blood-stained pews are still there, and a broken tile from the mortar shell was never fixed, to honor the legacy of these men."
"This is very simplified, and probably inaccurate in a few ways, but it is still an incredible story."
- JustACanadianGuy07
A Lack of Perspective
"In 1903, The New York Times published an article about flying machines. They stated that it would take the combined efforts of all Mathematicians and mechanics 1-to-10 million years for powered flight to be achieved."
"Anyway, about nine weeks later, the Wright brothers achieved powered flight for the first time."
"They were also overly cynical after. In 1910 they said that flight would only ever be for billionaires, of course, we had commercial flights by around the 60s achievable for many."
- Joe_PM2804
The Year Without Summer
"1816, The Year Without Summer."
- theassassintherapist
"I'm a big classic horror fan, so I'm kinda glad this happened. Indirectly lead to Mary Shelley writing 'Frankenstein.'"
- UniversalHammer71
An Astronomical Life Cycle
"Halley's Comet appeared in the sky when Mark Twain was born in 1835."
"The comet moves in a seventy-five or seventy-six-year orbit, and, as it neared Earth once again, Twain said, 'I came in with Halley’s Comet and I expect to go out with it.'"
"Sure enough, he died on April 21, 1910, just as the comet made its next pass within sight of Earth."
- SuvenPan
While history may not be everyone's favorite subject, it'd be really hard to believe if someone didn't find at least one of these hard-to-believe occurrences interesting.
Anyone raising children can attest to the difficult challenges involved with being a parent.
And despite every intention of getting it right by doing the best job they can, not everyone is a perfect at being mom or dad.
Hopefully, people will be able to look back on their childhood and recognize that everything their folks did for them was all out of love.
If only that was the case.
Unfortunately, there are those who were never meant to be parents and have scarred their children with bad memories.
Curious to hear from strangers about their experiences growing up, Redditor Deviant55 asked:
"What is something that your parents did that you will never forgive them for?"
Emotional scars run deep for the Redditors here sharing their horrific stories.
Staged Christmas Robbery
"Close to Christmas when I was around 10/11 years old, I was home alone when there was a knock on the door. I answered and it was one of my mum's acquaintances."
"He told me that he'd spoken to my mum and needed to come in to pick some stuff up, so off he went upstairs and proceeded to steal all of the Christmas presents that were destined to be placed under the tree for my brother, sister and I on Christmas morning."
"I was oblivious to what the stuff that needed to be picked up was."
"Mum comes home 30 minutes later, asks if anybody came round whilst she was out."
"Proud as punch I say 'yup, Craig came round and picked the stuff up you told him about.'"
"YOU LET HIM IN THE HOUSE?!?"
'oh crap'
"Mum runs upstairs...."
'he's stolen all of your Christmas presents, you'll have nothing for Christmas now!'
"High drama, anger and profound guilt filled the entire house for the remainder of the night and a while after."
"About 6 months later I overheard a conversation I shouldn't have and figured out that there were no Christmas presents to start with, the whole thing was a setup."
"The household budget didn't stretch to maintaining existence, sating a rampaging heroin addiction AND Christmas presents."
"So yeah, my mum concocted a perfect plan to hide the lack of Christmas presents, remove herself from any perceived blame and let a 10 year old boy think that he had ruined Christmas."
"Those were the days!"
– greenear_1
Losing A Pet
"My mum sold my dog while I was at work. When I came home and was looking for them she told me that someone came to see him today and that they loved and took him. He went to a good home, but I never got to even say goodbye."
– Fenrizian
A Recurring Ailmemt
"My mom left my bro and I behind to go be a methhead while lying to people about having cancer. I've confronted her, told her to show proof of the cancer. Nothing. She gets cancer every five to ten years without going to the doctors."
– ShazBishop
Forced To Referee
"Probably that I ended up being the mediator between my mom and dad as they went through a divorce and one side was being frustrating to communicate with than the other."
"So I in part had to act as a go between information and nagging them to communicate for stuff like medical bills and insurance and school payment stuff from 7-15 or so."
– Hellsoul0
Warning: These involve stories of abuse.
Step-parent get a bad rap because of these unfit parental figures.
Fake Public Persona
"Similar situation. Mom remarried a verbally and physically abusive DBag. The real kicker is him being a teacher at the local High School and loved by the community. He would choke us and throw us around and tell us we would amount to nothing. Even his own children."
"My mom wouldn’t really do anything about it and we complained to my dad. It really messed me and my brother up mentally. Drove us both into deep depression and anxiety as we got into high school. I ended up being a lot bigger than my step dad and he eventually stopped acting that way because I started standing up to him. Now he is pretty chill but I’ll never forgive him for that, or my Mom. My Mom denies denies denies that it was her fault."
– yaboymilky
These examples only reflect a small number of traumatic experiences contributed by Redditors who were brave enough to share their stories.
There were several hundred more examples, showing that it was not uncommon for people to grow up in unloving households.
Hopefully, they have each found a way to find peace and recognize their courage as they realized they were not alone in their trauma based on this emotional thread.
Be it for clothes, household appliances, or food, sometimes you know you can be one hundred percent confident with certain brands or companies when shopping that you will be getting a quality product.
Unfortunately, this goes both ways.
Some companies have a reputation for exclusively selling and manufacturing low-quality products.
One would think that these companies might reflect on poor sales and bad customer feedback, and attempt to improve their brand with each passing year.
Unfortunately, even if they still get items on the shelf, reviews on Amazon and elsewhere still seem to remain at two stars or less.
"What companies shamelessly make sh*t products, year after year?"
False Advertising
"Holiday gift basket companies."
"I once felt obliged to buy one from a lady I worked with and it cost around fifty dollars."
"She had a brochure with various baskets and I chose one that was assorted candies and had a decorative wooden rocking horse."
"When it arrived it was just a bag of candy that I could have paid 35 cents for at a gas station."- Artai55a
30 rock gift basket GIFGiphySave A Few Cents For Inferior Quality
"It’s a throwback, but rose art for sure."
"They just decided their destiny was to sit on the shelf next to Crayola and get purchased by folks who are balling on a budget or cheap."
"No goals for product improvement at all."
"Just 'hey, wanna save three bucks?'"- Lucetti
Improvements Unlikely In This Digital Age
"Any printer manufacturer."- gbeegz
"HP printers."
"I have a $600 fancy laser HP printer we got six or seven years ago, and they have succeeded in updating the software to the point that nothing works anymore."
"I used to be able to print over Wi-Fi easily, scan over Wi-Fi, etc and now none of it works."
"I haven't changed any of my network hardware, things are hardwired."
"Also, I used to be able to use aftermarket ink cartridges and the printer has started giving me sh*t about it."
"I really like HP's computers, but their printers are a bunch of bullsh*t."
"Oh and their auto-update software won't go away even though I keep disabling/ removing it, and it installs software updates that breaks the current functions."- Bazirker
It's The Customer Service You Pay For...
"Oracle."
"Products intentionally sh*tty so they can make most of their money selling consulting just to make it, sort of, work."- s-starr
One Reason Sports Should Always Be Played Outside
"EA sports titles."- Stitches_Ito
Even Carrie Bradshaw Doesn't Like Shoe Shopping THAT Much...
"Doc Martens."
"My old pair from 20 years ago are still going strong, any new pair I get craps out after a year."- korar67
Doc Martens Shoes GIF by SORANGiphyScreaming For Ice Cream... And Not In A Good Way...
"Breyers and their 'Frozen Dairy Dessert' nonsense."
"Before 2006, Breyers ice cream was really good!"
"I loved their coffee ice cream!"
"And then they changed their formula and made the mess they have now to the point that they can't even legally call it ice cream anymore."
"Does anyone remember those old Breyers commercials where the kid tries to read the ingredients on an inferior product and struggles to pronounce things like 'mono & diglycerides' and then easily reads Breyers ingredients as 'milk, sugar, and cream?'"
"What a joke."
"Unilever loves to buy brands people trust for quality products and use that trusted brand name to get people to buy lower quality for higher prices."
"It seriously has the same consistency as Cool Whip now."
"And Unilever has the audacity to say that this is what customers asked for!"- akittyafterus
Who Exactly Is His Audience?
"If lockpickinglawyer is anything to go on its lock-companies."- knatten555
Literally Selling Sh*t...
"Home Depot has been selling manure since its founding in 1978."
"In fact, a quick search of the website found they proudly sell over 178 manure products."- atomicscateboard
The Original "Catfishers"...
"Mad Catz got away with murder for years."- Einar_47
Apple Is Listening...
"Samsung appliances."
"F*CK YOUR FIRMWARE UPDATE ON THE FRIDGE!"
"Also those plastic trays keep breaking and are sh*t quality."
"My 1987 Maytag is still cranking the coldest brews on earth and hasn't been serviced ever in its life and sits in a dark room in my basement since he was demoted from the kitchen for being out of fashion by my wife."- zendor666
Customers Weren't Looking For An Authentic "Frontier" Experience...
"Frontier Airlines."
"Sh*t experience, customer service, quality, reliability, comfort, convenience and fees."- Micklikesmonkeys
There are those who always like to give second chances whenever possible.
When it comes to spending a little more money for a more reliable product, however, customers should rightfully be one and done.