Men are confusing creatures, even to other men. We do weird things, act tough for no reason, and often fear emotion. Why? Who knows.
Rancerle asked men of Reddit: What about men confuses you?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
10. We don't get it either.
Everything. I don't know how I got this far.
Same. I was raised by a single mother. I don't understand just about everything guys do as a group and I get super uncomfortable around more than one or two of them anyway
Ten percent luck
Twenty percent skill
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure
Fifty percent bluffing my a-- off and having no one call me on it
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name.
9. Because men aren't supposed to feel.
Why is so hard to make friends as adults? It was so easy when I was a kid, even as a teenager, but now everybody want to either sell me something or making me work for free, like, everyone I meet just want to talk business, usually bad business.
I can make female friends, but not male friends, WTF?
This speaks to me. I have lots of female friends and can regularly get them to hang out but making commitments with guy friends is impossible. Then I'll meet a cool guy and try to find a time to hang out and... nothing.
Women generally tend to be interested in people. It amazes me how little dudes generally talk about each other's lives. You're conditioned to shun emotion.
8. Toxic masculinity is ruining the world.
I'm always confused by men who want to start fights and are constantly aggressive. I'm a Marine, so I know what it feels like to be amped up on adrenaline and what it's like to fight. All that means the last thing I ever want to do when I'm out at a bar is get into a fight, let along start one over something stupid. There have certainly been a couple times when I've had to calm myself down, but everyone has those experiences. I just hate hothead macho men with nothing better to do than look for opportunities to be outraged by something. It's like dogs who think they see someone they don't know in front of their house.
7. "Whoa.=, I wish I was that cool." - Nobody
Loud mufflers. They don't make your Honda sound like a Ferrari. They make it sound like a broken Honda.
One of my friends the other day was super confused as to why people don't like loud mufflers.
I can't imagine any situation where I'd have my conversation interrupted by loud rumbling and not be pissed off
You mean people don't like being woken up in the morning or dead of night by some twats belting up and down the motorway in their sh!tmobiles?
I wish it were legal to jam the exhausts up.
6. F*ck off, the mood.
Why do they always want to fight after any sort of conflictโI yelled "nice" at this guy who cut in front of traffic and he rolled down his window and yelled "let's f*ckin fight bro come on."
Last year I was letting my dog out, my neighbors have a bonfire going. I ask over the fence "making smores?" And the guy just looks at me and yells "GO F*CK YOURSELF" and stares me down. Seems a reasonable reaction.
Probably just didn't want to share his smores the greedy bastard
5. "cAuSe It'S gAy..."
The men that are scared to hang out 1 on 1 because someone might think we're on a date. It's real, look it up.
Funny you say that. A good friend of mine and I grab food every few months. We went to a restaurant (ok, it was Olive Garden) and the hostess tried seating us next to one another, side by side.
She blushed when I elected to sit across the table. Can't two dudes enjoy a night at Olive Garden when they want without everyone thinking it's a date??
Homophobia runs so f*cking deep it's not even funny. I'll never understand why people are afraid of people they have never met thinking they're gay. Or just people in general thinking that, literally who cares.
4. Mind the gap.
When I'm standing at a urinal peeing and a guy comes up to use the one right next to me and there are clearly open urinals further down the row. Why do this? Don't you know you're breaking men's restroom etiquette?
A guy at my work not only does this, but will start talking. F*ck off bud, some of us are pee shy!
As for people who try to talk while they're sat on the toilet, there is nobody on the planet I want to talk to while something is halfway out of their butthole.
3. Narrator: it isn't.
You really think the way to a girls heart is by sending her a picture of your penis?
Oddly, quite effective on Grindr though.
2. Lift the seat.
Why do you pee all over the seat and not clean it? I get when you have to go badly and no time to lift the seat. But you have to know you made a mess and I'm sure when you walk into a piss covered stall you also get pissed.
Especially when they do it in their own house. Over at a friend's house and there's piss splattered on the floor or wall around the toilet. Dude, if you can't get it all in the pot, just sit down. It's your own house. You're pissing all over your own house. I don't get it.
1. Guys, chill.
I'm not hitting on your damn gf I'm just trying to see if our answers for the homework are the same.
I was talking to a girl about a project we had to do For a graduate class and I was asking her for help with one specific part of it. While I was messaging her through Facebook, I got another message from her boyfriend that said, "Stop messaging my girlfriend and worry about yourself."
He was a cop who had graduated from college like a year before. I said to her, "uh I think your boyfriend just messaged me." I sent her the screen cap of his message and she apologized for him, and I'm assuming she talked to him. Every time I saw him he'd give me the stink eye or something. They eventually got married. I hope that's going well.
This Store Clerk's Reaction To A Stolen Sneaker Prank Should Earn Him Employee Of The Month
Twitter user @HarvinthSkin decided to give a sales associate as his local shoe store a heart attack with a silly prank. All over the internet, people are sharing the prank and sending their well-wishes to the poor worker who experienced a moment of pure panic!
I had to give it a try? ๐๐คท๐พโโ๏ธ Instagram : @harvinthskin https://t.co/Am45kGWYLQโ Harvinth Skin (@Harvinth Skin) 1543237039.0
Don't worry too much about the unfortunate sales employee, howeverโit turns out he was given a raise as a consolation shortly thereafter!
I apologised and gave man like Martin a hug after that! ๐๐๐ JD Sports, give him a raise! ๐ต Do not try this unless youโre Zizan โ๏ธโ Harvinth Skin (@Harvinth Skin) 1543238141.0
The owner of the shoe store made clear to Skin that his employees were not to be messed with.
IM SO HAPPY THAT MAN LIKE MARTIN IS SEEN HERE WITH THE BOSS OF JD SPORTS ASIA AND IS GETTING A RAISE FOR HIS VALIANโฆ https://t.co/vL5QO2xCB5โ Harvinth Skin (@Harvinth Skin) 1543300966.0
The Big Boss of JD Sports MY! Fuck me ๐๐๐๐๐๐ https://t.co/nq3O0bdS92โ Harvinth Skin (@Harvinth Skin) 1543239495.0
On Twitter, people loved the sales clerk's reaction to Skin running out of the store.
@harvinthskin That sales be like https://t.co/0i27D7vIWKโ Ignasius Kurniawan (@Ignasius Kurniawan) 1543239042.0
@harvinthskin Best one yet cause he went out the store lmaoโ Andradรฉ (@Andradรฉ) 1543265867.0
Some thought they may have reacted differently in the same situation...
@harvinthskin @thirdeyescribe Me watching you run out of the store like https://t.co/31kkJcHjOVโ The Count ๐๐ผโโ๏ธ (@The Count ๐๐ผโโ๏ธ) 1543370777.0
But everyone got a good laugh out of the innocent prank.
@harvinthskin @kxsxhh This shit was so funny....it made my dayโ Manvir (@Manvir) 1543247327.0
@harvinthskin @queenb0414 ๐๐๐๐๐๐ https://t.co/bejrX57i6wโ ๐ (@๐) 1543275269.0
@harvinthskin @iced_coffeee https://t.co/bqP08ZK3r9โ Manuel Jr. (@Manuel Jr.) 1543358200.0
The incident also gave us some priceless reactions!
@harvinthskin โwhew my bruce lee almost came outโ https://t.co/SOUOZ4IzBEโ Nyree. (@Nyree.) 1543344926.0
@harvinthskin @ClassyyMocha ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฆโโ๏ธSaw his whole life n last paycheck that fast!!โ โFZA of FUPA-Tang Clan๐ง๐ฟ (@โFZA of FUPA-Tang Clan๐ง๐ฟ) 1543288463.0
@sofarhangone @harvinthskin @ChiSupreme @llma95_ Run up? More like run out!! https://t.co/HwHu2TT4vOโ Desi Kubrick (@Desi Kubrick) 1543320755.0
Remember, everyone: it's important to try before you buy!
@harvinthskin @mjcz1 @LeeODell84 @reevesyboi93 try before you buy. why notโ 494949494949 (@494949494949) 1543512590.0
High School Administration Under Fire For Breaking Into A Bathroom Stall While Transgender Student Was Using It
Cece is a 16-year-old transgender girl from Maple Grove, Minnesota.
She is a student at Osseo Senior High School and recently had a traumatic experience at school.
On Wednesday, Cece posted two videos, one of which is very disturbing, to her Facebook regarding an incident she experienced.
While Cece was using the bathroom at school, staff forced their way into the stall she was in.
Again, Cece is 16 years old.
Her post reads:
"SCHOOL OSSEO SEINOR HIGH ๐จ
I Guess I Can't Use The Girls Bathroom Just Because I'm Transgender ๐ Share This & MAKE IT GO VIRAL โผ๏ธ I Been Violating By Principal and Admin and Hallmonters
This Was Today 11/28/18 ๐ Ms Smith Had Nothing To Do With This"
One video showed all of the school officials she wanted to publicly name who participated in the incident.
The other showed the actual incident.
Cece's self-recorded video shows her sitting on the toilet with her pants down while a school official uses a makeshift device to reach over the stall to unlock the door.
A spokesperson for Osseo Schools stated:
"Social media posts are significantly misrepresenting the incident and that staff works very hard every day to help ensure an inclusive school where all students feel welcome, respected and safe."
They refused to comment further saying:
"We wish we could provide additional details about this incident but are committed to protecting the student's right to data privacy."
Some reports claim that Cece had previously been told not to use the women's restroom.
However, in 2017 the Minnesota Department of Education (MDOE) ruled in favor of students like Cece.
MDOE guidance states:
"Transgender and gender nonconforming students should be afforded the opportunity to use the restroom of their choice."
People also can not help but note the fact that at age 16, Cece is a minor.
Adults forcing themselves into her stall while she used the bathroom is even more appalling.
Moriah Skai Kiskaden (Facebook)
Look, guys, when a kid is in the bathroom stall with their pants down, and you pry open the stall, exposing them toโฆ https://t.co/rzMktZEkEBโ Thomas Page (@Thomas Page) 1543690840
This should be sexual assault assault of a minor. Anyone involved should IMMEDIATELY be relieved from their positioโฆ https://t.co/M5ByUSBvBPโ CrystalshineMarie (@CrystalshineMarie) 1543626160
Regardless of the unknown circumstances, the internet is outraged over the adult school staff's actions.
1st thing I saw this AM & now I canโt stop thinking about it. Unless she was assaulting another student, there isโฆ https://t.co/nkeudm8mANโ BadAssGrandma (@BadAssGrandma) 1543679009
Transphobic adults literally busted the bathroom door open on a trans high school student today in Minnesota bc theโฆ https://t.co/rojArsFW9Qโ mother sister (@mother sister) 1543465561
Look at the face of the woman who has unlocked the bathroom door!Arrogant assholes https://t.co/X98JSgHgMxโ Teresa Culhane (@Teresa Culhane) 1543698568
Cece's video and story has indeed gone viral. But what happens now remains to be seen.
H/T: Pink News, Facebook, Daily Dot, Bring Me The News
Kendall Jenner Wearing A Massive Winter Coat Is Like Lenny Kravitz's Scarf 2.0 ๐
We all love a good meme, and the best memes often imitate life. Model Kendall Jenner is the latest target of the Instagram account @itsmaysmemes, which photoshops celebrities in hilariously oversized outerwear.
At least it looks cozy...
Soon, Vogue France tweeted the image and all hell broke loose.
Winter is coming ! https://t.co/obJe6bO87Bโ Vogue.fr (@Vogue.fr) 1540199684.0
The caption reads:
"Winter is coming !"
Indeed.
People made their own versions.
@VogueParis @KendallJenner oh okay... https://t.co/Willu5LSlNโ ูleah (@ูleah) 1540383130.0
@VogueParis @KendallJenner Fixed it! https://t.co/ThTnfVSfvkโ sleepy jorge (@sleepy jorge) 1540480172.0
@VogueParis @KendallJenner https://t.co/p5CTJDEiqJโ Ty ยฉ๏ธ (@Ty ยฉ๏ธ) 1540502215.0
Some compared it to other strange fashion choices we've seen over the years.
@VogueParis @KendallJenner https://t.co/hnLvEvRJABโ Bouzid Van Der Woodsen (@Bouzid Van Der Woodsen) 1540230561.0
@VogueParis @KendallJenner New couple with @LennyKravitz?? https://t.co/oCS3WAi3Xdโ ใใใฐใ! (@ใใใฐใ!) 1540248515.0
@VogueParis @KendallJenner https://t.co/zAB6xKmu8Tโ TheBowLeggโdOne (@TheBowLeggโdOne) 1540471862.0
And there were those who had some pretty interesting ideas about what this looked like.
How your girl looks when she says she's cold and you give her your coat https://t.co/louipQI66kโ Jack Skellington (@Jack Skellington) 1540405914.0
This is what P.E. teachers would be wearing during winter while shouting at students to stop complaining that itโsโฆ https://t.co/5qDubio0mXโ ุงููุดุจุง (@ุงููุดุจุง) 1540392391.0
Perhaps we loved it because it did seem just avant garde enough for Jenner to actually wear. Turns out we all can! Well, sort of. The jacket is a digitally enlarged version of The Super Puff jacket at Aritzia. Even the non-Photoshopped version looks pretty cozy!
H/T: Huffington Post, Twitter
This Brand's Tweet History Is A Hilariously Fitting Representation Of A Brand's Life Cycle ๐
Carl's Croutons tried their hand at social media to advance their brand.
But their objective got derailed when their tweet ignited a confusing thread that sent everyone down the rabbit hole.
@topherflorence captured highlights from the thread that received over three thousand retweets for its zaniness alone.
Can you follow?
the history of every brand on twitter somehow https://t.co/fWVXsElCvrโ D๐CFUTURE (@D๐CFUTURE) 1540403954.0
The bread crumbs company endeavored to stir excitement for the brand by encouraging participation with the following tweet:
"Taking our first steps on the www!! tell us your favorite crouton recipes! #croutons #yum"
Harmless, right?
But somewhere along the way, the brand mixed business with politics. @religiousgames noticed that Carl's Croutons issued a one-word directive: vote.
The Twitter user asked, "What does it mean?"
@topherflorence What does it mean? https://t.co/IKifvva7baโ Vincent Gonzalez (@Vincent Gonzalez) 1540408943.0
Did the Carl's Croutons account manager get his social media account wires crossed? Possibly. But then we're not sure.
@topherflorence responded by saying, "lol that wasn't me i would posted something way dumber."
@religiousgames lol that wasn't me i woulda posted something way dumberโ D๐CFUTURE (@D๐CFUTURE) 1540409220.0
The following tweet from Carl's Croutons attempted damage control:
"Carl's Crutons [sic] regrets the inappropriate tweet from earlier and we sincerely apologize to the people of The Republic of Malta."
So how did Carl's Croutons insult the Republic of Malta?
@topherflorence @oggborbis ...how did they insult Malta? I need to know.โ astronaatti (@astronaatti) 1540405285.0
@Bestorb shed some light on why the Southern European island country may have been insulted by sharing a YouTube clip of episode 1008, "Final Justice," from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
Did it have something to do with the country's dominant population of women?
@astronaatti @topherflorence @oggborbis https://t.co/9imm31y8cMโ Nick Bestor (@Nick Bestor) 1540429565.0
The thread spun off in all different directions.
@topherflorence @xoxogossipgita laughing hardest at crouton recipesโ super normal internet (@super normal internet) 1540492558.0
@topherflorence That last one is life ๐๐ฝโ Rich F. Santiago (@Rich F. Santiago) 1540418084.0
@topherflorence WOW this was a ride.โ Jackal's Husband, Yuko (@Jackal's Husband, Yuko) 1540405005.0
@ItsBobberto @topherflorence @austin_walker Late stage social media.โ Mr. Jackpots (@Mr. Jackpots) 1540435914.0
There were many takeaways from the esoteric thread, but the one directive really stood out.
@topherflorence @MaxKriegerVG Haha, you got me. But seriously, vote.โ Benoit Doidic (@Benoit Doidic) 1540414697.0
@topherflorence @zoebread Clever girl. https://t.co/i5VB74s8F9โ brott rambler but spooky (@brott rambler but spooky) 1540478919.0
@topherflorence @NoraReed This was a wild ride.โ Queer Eye for the Animorphs Reboot (@Queer Eye for the Animorphs Reboot) 1540412903.0
@topherflorence @seangentille Iโm experiencing a new level of cringe right nowโ Helle Hansen ๐ธ (@Helle Hansen ๐ธ) 1540423182.0
@topherflorence @ZaaackKoootzer This is the greatest thing I've seen all dayโ your very own monica bellucci dream (@your very own monica bellucci dream) 1540406700.0
@topherflorence @spacetwinks Optimistic engagement. Regret. 'How do you do, fellow kids.' Unity through shared outrโฆ https://t.co/6VGrLNPZVpโ Ink-stained @ MFF 2018 (@Ink-stained @ MFF 2018) 1540405582.0
@topherflorence @spacetwinks 2 is where they decided to hire a social media manager. 3 is when they decided to hire a different one.โ Ink-stained @ MFF 2018 (@Ink-stained @ MFF 2018) 1540412100.0
@LaserBlade @topherflorence yeah i actually think they're pretty good croutons but then again they pay me to say thatโ cool dog mowing lawn (@cool dog mowing lawn) 1540436982.0
@topherflorence @mattfx This is magically funny like Goofy doing an unannounced set in a small black roomโ M๐R (@M๐R) 1540482697.0
@topherflorence @ZaaackKoootzer This is the greatest thing I've seen all dayโ your very own monica bellucci dream (@your very own monica bellucci dream) 1540406700.0
There's still an unanswered question.
@topherflorence I need to know the Malta story thoโ NeoSorosbot (@NeoSorosbot) 1540423045.0
So who is Carl's Croutons anyway? Nobody knows. Just vote.