As humans, we all make mistakes, and it's important to recognize that and atone for the messes we make.
Wendy Williams is learning that lesson this week after comments she made about Joaquin Phoenix's appearance.
While doing a recap of the Golden Globes on her talk show, The Wendy Williams Show, Williams focused first on Beyonce's decision not to rise for the standing ovation given to Joaquin Phoenix after his win for Joker. At first, in what seemed like a commentary on Beyonce's refusal to rise, Williams asked who Joaquin Phoenix is, but very quickly any point she was trying to make got lost in the weeds.
Instead of focusing on Phoenix's win for Joker, or other ways he's contributed to the acting community, she instead focused on his appearance.
Williams confessed:
"By the way, I think I've shared this with you before: I find him oddly attractive. He played that Johnny Cash. It wasn't Reese [Witherspoon] who kept me. It was him."
While referencing a picture from Joker, Williams said:
"This right here, I don't know anything about this."
Williams then tried to make a point, before the whole commentary turned ugly:
"He knows how to transform. When he shaves [his beard] off... The way he looks at you... he's got that good nose... He's got that, what do you call it? Cleft lip. I find that to be very attractive."
Williams then pulled up her lip in a mocking way and held the gesture for an upwards of ten seconds for the camera.
Fox
Comments started pouring in quickly regarding Williams' insensitive actions.
Many said this qualified as bullying against those born with cleft palates or cleft lips and demanded Williams respond and apologize for her behavior.
Day 3 We are still waiting for a @WendyWilliams apology to the cleft community. Outside of that, seeing everyone c… https://t.co/32Xb9aTP1C— Adam Bighill (@Adam Bighill) 1578871314.0
@WendyWilliams should feel ashamed for being so disrespectful joking about Joaquin Phoenix cleft lip, not only to h… https://t.co/BX9t07f0TK— brandon (@brandon) 1578507362.0
@WendyWilliams - as the mom of an 11 yr old girl who was born with cleft lip & palate, I was horrified to see you m… https://t.co/04w3zkfCLa— Julie Snyder 🧢 (@Julie Snyder 🧢) 1578498859.0
One of the most vocal critics was Canadian football player Adam Bighill, whose young son, Beau, had surgery just this week to repair his lip.
Today is Beau’s big day. He is getting his lip repaired today in Winnipeg by the fantastic Dr. Ross. Thanks to ever… https://t.co/oXAPoHIj6b— Adam Bighill (@Adam Bighill) 1579106292.0
He called Williams out for promoting "bullying."
Thank you @FarhanLaljiTSN at the end of the day this is something we can all rally behind, and that’s a mission to… https://t.co/MngHJ0eBFu— Adam Bighill (@Adam Bighill) 1579108235.0
After several days of silence, Williams offered an apology to Bighill and the cleft community while asking her fans to donate to a charity that helps those with facial deformities through free corrective surgical procedures.
. @Bighill44 We’re thinking about Beau today as he is in surgery. I want to apologize to the cleft community and in… https://t.co/J4dSywb298— Wendy Williams (@Wendy Williams) 1579135247.0
Many, however, were unhappy with the brief apology and pointed out that it was more of an ask for donations.
Williams also appears to attempt to buy her way out of her behavior with her show's donations to the two causes.
She also didn't apologize to Phoenix specifically, who was the target of her original comments.
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate So it's ok to be a bully if you can pay your way out of it?— Golden Goose (@Golden Goose) 1579143650.0
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate BYE WENDY, BYE! #Shameful #heartless— Annette Tucci (@Annette Tucci) 1579138796.0
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate Your apology doesn’t change the meaning you are awful pe… https://t.co/mPz2gX8z5z— ⭐️✨POSH🌟💫 (@⭐️✨POSH🌟💫) 1579140542.0
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate What you did was totally unacceptable. I’m a speech pat… https://t.co/itmZXbvuTK— Robert Evans (@Robert Evans) 1579144417.0
@kuhnperalta @WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate She’s not sorry-only doing it to hang on to… https://t.co/XUlvOvKUuU— Joan Young (@Joan Young) 1579157343.0
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate I have a cleft lip and palate and had multiple correctio… https://t.co/Kx0nbLs5ZK— a Millennial (@a Millennial) 1579143474.0
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate Too little, too late... a grown woman should know better… https://t.co/niypV5aIhS— Lynda S (@Lynda S) 1579135395.0
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate As a person with a cleft lip your so called apology isn’… https://t.co/AvzhWErx1u— Paul 🏳️🌈 (@Paul 🏳️🌈) 1579141502.0
@WendyWilliams @Bighill44 @operationsmile @AmerCleftPalate Too little too late. You’re always running that big mout… https://t.co/YbpmHwiiMA— #RIPKevinBacon (@#RIPKevinBacon) 1579137685.0
Whether or not Williams will expand upon her apology and include Joaquin Phoenix this time remains unclear.
But many hope Williams will think before she speaks in the future.
But sometimes, the wisdom imparted by friends isn't always helpful or relevant to the situation.
Curious to hear from strangers online who could do without specific knowledge, Redditor Saibotnl1 asked:
"What life advice can just f'k off?"
These Redditors have a problem with how certain people have on outlook on life.
Time To Rest
"Sleep when you’re dead."
"Cool, but you’re going to be dead a lot sooner."
– Tag2graff
Irrelevant Sadness
"People have it so much worse than you so don’t be sad!"
– notrachelmar
"To that I like to say, 'people have it so much better than you so don't be happy!'"
– ___jupiter____
Your Life Path
"Almost anything relating to what age you must be in order to buy a house, have children, marry, have a profession, or do anything else. Seriously, everyone's life is different from everyone else's. Make your life the way you want it to be. If you so desire. Up to you."
– Frn071
On The Contrary
“Cheaters never prosper”
"Yes, they f'king do."
– waqasnaseem07
People can get out of any situation they find displeasing.
But others feel people should just "stick it out."
Ignoring Bullies
"Just ignore bullys or get someone else to handle it for you. I have never seen this work, only makes it worse. The only effective way I've seen to deal with them is by not making yourself an easy target and make them scared to f'k with you again. If going psycho on their a** is the only thing they'll respond to that's their fault. Also want to add in schools they will punish you for self defense but that punishment is only sitting around a few hours in detention or sitting around at home with a suspension. The punishment is temporary boredom, it's absolutely nothing compared to being bullied and when it's over the important message will still stand that you will not tolerate being a victim."
– User Delted
Remain to be Miserable
"Stick it out"
"Whether that's sh**ty jobs, shi**y relationships, shi**y living situations..."
"By all means don't just give up on things when you face challenges, but if something feels wrong or is wrecking your peace then take some control and change it if you can!"
– petitezoey
"Easy for you to say," might be an auto-response to these suggestions for many people.
Invitation For Recklesslessness
"Live like everyday was your last"
Yall know what people do when they learn they have a single day left to live?"
– LimeGrass619
A Possible Consequence
"I did that as a teenager and ended up homeless and addicted to heroin. Didn’t pan out for me too well."
"19 years sober though today."
– Open-Section-7263
A Practical Approach
"If I knew with certainty that I had one day left, I'd double-check all my financials, my will, and my insurance policies, make sure my wife had all of my passwords and knew where all the money was, spend the rest of the day with her and the kids, then call the medical examiner and ask to lie down on the gurney so that when I die they won't strain their back moving my remains out of my house."
– Asteriad
Nose Stuck In A Book
"Work while they sleep. Study while they party"
"That's not a recipe for success, that's a recipe for a lot of white hairs, burnout syndrome and a stroke before your 40s..."
– Khomuna
Doesn't Apply To Everyone
"Do what you love and money will follow"
"I love walking my dogs and grilling food for my friends but That sh*t doesn't pay the bills as well as my engineering degree!"
– Elons_android
While people's intentions are good, they're better off keeping their two cents in their own pockets.
Not everyone likes to hear platitudes.
Sometimes, people just want to know they're not alone with their problems over listening to unlikely solutions that are nothing more than superficial pick-me-ups.
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