Years ago I became an officiant to preside over my best friend's wedding. I was super excited because I love a good spotlight performance, let's be honest, the officiant is the principal lead, at least at my weddings. I am also an avid daytime and primetime soap opera junkie.
I live for those weddings where the real love of whoever's life stands up makes a whole bunch of mess. From Luke, Laura and Scotty on General Hospital to Jackson, April, Matthew and Stephanie on Grey's Anatomy, those wedding interruptions were fantastic high drama and I yearn for the day I officiate a wedding and witness this moment in real-time--with a happy ending of course. These are the reasons you always pay for an open bar.
Redditor u/CC2385 wanted to hear from everybody who has lead a wedding when that "soap opera" moment has actually happened by asking..... Wedding registrars/ officiants: Has anyone ever spoken up when asking "speak now or forever hold your peace"? What happened?BTW... I am still available for weddings.
Clear your throat....
GiphyOnly thing close, although I wasn't the officiant, was the groom's mother coughed when this was asked, as she didn't like the bride.
Cuckoo....
A wedding years ago at the bride's parents home. Everything was perfect. They thought that they had thought of everything, but when the question was asked, right on cue, the cuckoo clock sounded off. It was ten minutes before they could continue, and even then the officiant, bride and groom were choking back giggles. They were still together 25 years and 2 kids later.
"start some crap"
We were doing the practice run the day before the wedding and my best man took me aside and told me in private that if I got cold feet he would object and "start some crap" to distract everyone for me to make my exit. He even checked the back church doors to make sure. During the ceremony he was the first person I looked at when they asked. Besides the Peter Griffin laugh when he handed me the ring it all went smoothly.
Sea Monster
GiphyAt my wedding we were asked that, as the room went silent all of a sudden we heard my friend's 4 year old pipe up with "I'm a jellyfish!". Broke the tension!
'Til Death!
"I'D RATHER DIE THAN LET THIS MAN MARRY MY DAUGHTER!!" -Mother of Daughter
The husband was an abusive alcoholic, the daughter showing up at her mother's door multiple times covered in bruises with her children crying, and when the priest asked the daughter if she still wanted to continue she was like "Yeah. He's gonna change."
He did not.
Poor Matt
My sister's wedding last summer, when the officiant was at that part, my dad yelled "c'mon lets all admit we don't like Matt (the soon to be husband) so we can get out of here". My dad is also an alcoholic so it makes more sense and he was kicked out so yay. Makes it even funnier because no one in my family 100% likes my sisters husband.
The Strawberry Family
My grandmother's sister's family owns a large farm and on this farm is a beautiful strawberry patch. My cousin got married in peak strawberry season in the patch. It was beautiful. The patch is right beside the irrigation pond the sprinkler system is attached to that keeps the strawberries watered.
As the preacher asked if anyone objected to the match a flock of geese took off from the pond going, "WAAAACK, WAAAACK, WAAAAACK, WAAAACK!" It was captured on film and everyone got a kick out of it.
Times Up....
"Last chance Em!" - father of the bride.
To be fair to the groom, she isn't exactly a winner either. Everyone giggled like it was a joke. It was not. They married in April last year (4-20 hurr durr durr) with a pot themed wedding.
"but I love him!"
It happened at my wedding. My now husband's group of high school friends say together at the back. When the question was asked one yelled "but I love him!" The room was silent for a second before my husband and I broke out laughing. It wasn't a serious ceremony, we had a sex joke mixed in there and I had a bridesmaid faint. 10/10 would have my ceremony happen the same way.
HER?!
wedding beach GIFGiphyI wasn't there, but when my cousin was little (like 3) I wasn't officiating but attending a family friends wedding (Groom). I was sitting pretty far back so I didnt hear everything but basically as soon as the officiant said "Speak now or forever hold your peace". One of the bridesmaids had muttered something under her breath. There was a big gasp and then chaos because one of the other bridesmaids had started swinging on her and the bride was egging her on. The groomsmen stepped up and broke it up and the bride and groom walked away to talk. What I found out was the bridesmaid who had spoken up was the groom's sister. She apparently had found out that on the weekend of the bachelorette party the bride had screwed her ex BF. She had muttered it "under her breath" but of course loud enough for the wedding party to hear. The brides best friend then started swinging on her.
Everything was awkward until they called the wedding off and hour later.
A few months later they broke up. I guess the bride had had a few more indiscretions during their relationships that came out in counseling..
She was in love with said best friend. So when they asked that, she yelled "WHY DID YOU MARRY HER?!" Much laughter ensued, and we still talk about it thirty years later. Pretty sure they're still married.
I wasn't officiating but attending a family friends wedding (Groom). I was sitting pretty far back so I didnt hear everything but basically as soon as the officiant said "Speak now or forever hold your peace". One of the bridesmaids had muttered something under her breath. There was a big gasp and then chaos because one of the other bridesmaids had started swinging on her and the bride was egging her on. The groomsmen stepped up and broke it up and the bride and groom walked away to talk.
What I found out was the bridesmaid who had spoken up was the groom's sister. She apparently had found out that on the weekend of the bachelorette party the bride had screwed her ex BF. She had muttered it "under her breath" but of course loud enough for the wedding party to hear. The brides best friend then started swinging on her.
Everything was awkward until they called the wedding off and hour later.
A few months later they broke up. I guess the bride had had a few more indiscretions during their relationships that came out in counseling.
First hand account
I'll make the story short, always had an on again-off again deal with this woman for many years. The day before her wedding she came to my house, spend the whole day. Her friends, parents, everybody but the groom called me throughout the whole day and evening if I had seen her. I lied to all these people per her request. She wanted to marry me and not the groom. Said multiple times during the day and during our 'activities'.
It was weird. Late that night she left my house and I didn't hear from her, or anybody else till the ceremony the next day. Day was totally normal until the officiant asked that loaded question. Bride's eyes shifted to me and so did a few other people. Never been so nervous in my life to not make a damn sound. I was sealed up tighter then a frog's a-hole. I didn't say anything. The ceremony went on as normal and once it was done. I got in my car and left.
Check all the rooms
This happened at my wedding; well, it was more that it was interrupted- my fiancé was still married! He had told me she died, and that's why I was hired as a nanny for his kids. So, his BIL and his lawyer stopped the wedding. Turns out his first wife had serious mental health problems, was an arsonist, and was living in another part of the house. No wonder it was a quick engagement!
Anyways, wedding was called off and I noped out. Then she died in a fire she lit, the whole house burned down, ex-fiancé went blind. I went to check in on him later, I mean, it was mostly for the kids but kinda wanted to show off how I was doing better in life.
We kinda got back together though.
Smite instead of smitten
Friend's in-home wedding. A thunderstorm started as they started the ceremony. "Speak now or forever hold your peace" - huge thunderclap that echoed for a few seconds. It was accurate, don't think they lasted a year.
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Curious about what constituted low points, Reddit user beesechugersports asked:
"What was the worst year of your life?"
Childhood Trauma
"1987. I was 13."
My dad was killed when he was hit by a car. Total accident."
"I think about the driver sometimes. I hope he forgave himself."
"I honestly don't recall ever feeling anything toward that guy. I think I was more upset with the neighbor who came to our door to tell us he thought my dad was in an accident."
"My mom piled us in the car and we drove down the street to the scene. My dad's body was under a sheet.
"That night I was numb until my mom hugged me and I bawled in her arms. After that I pretty much shut down emotionally for a couple decades."
"Took me a long time to get help for my own PTSD."
~ surfingonmars
Losses
"2011 - Lost my job, girlfriend, friends, had to move back in with my folks where I fell into a deep depression."
"That went on on until 2014 when I was able to turn the ship around."
~ max-peck
"People underestimate how horrible those 2-3 yrs of depression feel."
"I was in rock bottom depression for 2 yrs and it felt like a decade passing by."
~ secondhand_bra
Future Derailed
"2012. The year started out great. I met and befriended an adult film actress on my birthday and had an active sex life for the first time ever."
"I was finally off the night shift at my job. I applied for grad school. I was accepted into a program for veterans at the Writer's Guild of America."
"I had finally arrived."
"But by September it was all over. My relationship with 'Nadia' had turned toxic and ended in a huge fight."
"I was rejected from grad school. The WGA program didn't pan out for me."
"Worst of all, I was fired from my good job. I nearly became homeless and had to go back to working the night shift guarding a gated community in Beverly Hills."
"By the year's end, I was alone and broke (I would declare bankruptcy early the next year) with no hope for the future."
~ SgtSharki
Economic Downturn
"2014. My business suffered a 4 million dollar loss."
"Then my fiancée who I was with for 6 years left me for her boss just 3 months before our wedding."
"I wasn't able to find another partner but I did recover from the absolute shambles I was in."
"Just the fact that I'm able to function normally and interact with people again without breaking down is a big win for me."
~ S_MZ
Post College Struggles
"2014—the year I graduated college and was looking for work and had bad acne and unrelenting pressure from my parents and a poor social life and I worked Uber while studying for the Chartered Financial Analyst exam that I ended up failing."
~ Damerman
Friends Lost
"2017. I lost my best friend that year.. we met during our first year of university and immediately hit it off and became close."
"We were inseparable for 7 years. I’ve never been the same since then.. I died with him."
"I wish I could’ve helped him.. I wish I could just take one last drive and smoke one last cigarette with him ,and tell him how much I love him and how much he means to me."
"Please tell your friends that you love them whenever you get the chance.. you never know when will be the last time you hang out together."
~ Syouf
Seeing the Light
"2018. Realized I was part of a cult."
"It was called the Great Commission Churches when I attended though they’ve changed their name multiple times over the years when they’ve been accused of abusive practices."
~ Consistent-Way-2018
Long Road to Recovery
"2019. Last straw at my job, where the management team turned on me, resulting in me putting in my 2 weeks after my complaint against a lying supervisor was dismissed."
"Had no more income, so I couldn't pay rent, and thus had to move out of the shared house I had with a friend and his fiancée (wasn't on lease, had no obligation to stay, and the fiancée even told me "you know, you don't have to live here" during an argument)."
"Said fiancée convinced him to turn on me and drop me as a friend, which resulted in him going off and convincing the only other friend I had to do the same."
"Covid hit."
"My cat developed a genetic illness that paralyzed her and my step-father put her down behind my back. My childhood dog developed cancer and was suffering so she was also put down, but I was able to hold her while she passed."
"Great aunt died of cancer, great uncle (other side of family) died of cancer."
"That was the lowest I've ever been, and I haven't even recovered 20% yet."
~ Whatsa-Throwaway
Pandemic Pandemonium
"2021 was the year when my mental health was worse than ever."
"Looking back I'm proud of myself that I just survived."
~ Master-Mood1816
"Well done on that and also, same."
"2021 can go straight in the bin."
~ sicklything
GiphyAftermath
"On the flip side 2021 was probably one of the best years of mine as an adult."
"My girlfriend and I were able to spend so much time together because she was only working maybe 1 day a week and I worked at an empty warehouse from 7 to 3 Monday to Friday."
"When everything went back to normal we both were working so much we ended up splitting up, so I guess 2022 sucked pretty bad."
~ ofTHEbattle
"2023. By far the worst year of my life.
"Got laid off, took forever to find a new job, fiancée got pregnant then lost it then she got cancer, hated my new job, went heavily into debt to survive, fiancée beats cancer, she gets a life insurance payout from her father's passing, she gets pregnant again."
"Then I find out after she up and vanishes suddenly that every single thing was a lie. She faked it all from top to bottom for two years and pulled the rug out from under me, suddenly running off with our dogs."
"Since then I guess she needs some sick gratification that she’s not getting from just all that and continues to stalk me on social media/Reddit as well as spoof her phone number to text me sh*t with purely the intent of trying to hurt me."
"Losing the dogs hurt and still hurts, won’t lie, but being rid of her has been nothing short of a blessing."
~ Ok_Outside_4650
"This year—2023."
"My dog died in June."
"My wife died in July."
"My cat died in August."
"I have 5 kids."
~ MichaelHoncho
Dear whatever doesn't kill me, I'm strong enough now.
"Every year seems to beat the previous."
~ BenChodABQ
Oof, that's a lot to take.
While some are still going through it, many have already come out on the other side.
Here's hoping better days are ahead soon for everyone.
Giphy