Guys Break Down Why Their Last Partner Broke Up With Them
Reddit user GreekRifle asked: 'Men, why did your last girlfriend dump you?'
A breakup is never easy.
Even so, it is sometimes the only solution when one, or both, members of a couple realize that their relationship simply isn't meant to be.
Sometimes, pinpointing what went wrong in a relationship is difficult that and even years later you still can't find a single reason.
Other times, however, why a relationship came to an end is made abundantly clear by your former partner, sometimes letting you down easily, other times not mincing word one bit.
Redditor GreekRifle was curious to hear from the men of Reddit why their partners chose to end their relationships, leading them to ask:
"Men, why did your last girlfriend dump you?"
A Love That Will Never Die...
"She was in love with her gay best friend."- Lucius_Funk
Communication Is Key
"We didn’t really get each other communication-wise."- heyitsvonage
Too Close To Home...
"Because my mother died of a terminal illness and she had (unbeknownst to me) breast cancer."
"I think she knew it would have wrecked me all over again."- fdxfgyhers
To Love Another, You Must Also Love Yourself.
"I didn't take care of myself."
"I degraded to a state that made me boot worthy"- ToeKnail
Did You Hear That?
"Because I was a sh*tty listener."
"I immediately went and bought and read 4 books on listening."
"I won’t have that happen again."- awerwe4yuti
A Very Important Decision
"She wanted children, I did not."
"We kinda dumped each other for the best, but she took more initiative to see it through."- BrukaAllvar
Wasn't Meant To Last
"Both of us were busy with school and work and so we were spending less time together than usual."
"Around a month into this, she decided that the relationship had gone stale and we should break up."
"I'm not gonna pretend like it was only her fault, cus I only realized how stale our relationship had gotten when she texted me to ask for a breakup."
"I did offer to try and salvage it all, but she turned that idea down pretty quickly."
"Like half a year later she called me in a drunken state and asked if I want to hook up with her."- Phoenix_BFN
On To Better Things... Or Not...
"We were 19 (her) and 22 (me)."
"She decided she wanted to date her coworker."
"A 37 year old pizza delivery guy who lived with his mom and had 2 kids from a previous marriage that he admittedly screwed up."
"They ended up getting married, she was the primary/only breadwinner for awhile because he got fired and then just kinda never tried getting hired again."
"They eventually split up because I think he cheated on her and she tried reaching out to me on Facebook and through mutual friends."
"Yeah………no thanks."
"By then I was married to the love of my life, had 3 kids, a career, just bought a house and adopted a dipsh*t husky from the pound."
"I’m good."- Thebaldsasquatch
"The dude she'd liked for many many years who always told her no when she asked him out realized he could very well lose her to me and said If she wanted to date him he'd go for it now."
"She left me, 4 months later she married him, and now 13 years later is IIRC Divorced from him."
"Jokes on her though, 6 months after we broke up I started dating a friend of mine, we dated for 2 years (compared to 2 months with the ex) and then we got married, and we just had our 11th wedding anniversary in august."
"We have a 4 year old son and every aspect of our relationship is way way better than my relationship with the ex."-evileyeball
It's Complicated...
"She stated that we were headed in different directions."
"She said she still loved me but couldn’t do the relationship anymore as she was 'dragging me down'."
"She was dealing with something that she just couldn’t deal with while being in a relationship with me."
" All of these are reasons she gave me the day we broke up."
"I truly hadn’t seen this happening as we had been talking about marriage."
"She had brought it up and then a month later she asked to go on a two week break, then asked to end the break early because she didn’t want to loose me."
"Less than a week later we broke up because she 'just couldn’t do this anymore'."
"All in all I suppose I don’t know."
"I thought we would spend our lives together, and she had told me constantly that was what she wanted."
"Then one day I suppose she woke up and decided we were over."
"I don’t hold any resentment towards her, and I wouldn’t ask her to explain why."
"Sometimes you fall in love just to fall out of it."
"Other times you find the right person at the wrong time, it really doesn’t matter."
"I hope she finds the right person for her, and I know I’ll keep on moving forward til the day I can’t."- RansomTheTrees
There's No Place Like Home...
"She realized, that she stopped being happy to come home and found things to do to stay out."
"I wanted to end the relationship on the very same day or wanted to have a talk, so not too bad of a break up."- Resident-Worry-2403
Anyone's Guess
"Ask her."
"Really I don't know why she broke up with me."- frogmicky
Ironically, It's Wrong To Always Need To Be Right...
"Wasn’t mature enough to put her feelings before my position in an argument."
"Unfortunately had to learn to be a better person at the expense of an innocent person."- kitchensclosed
Everyone Deserves A Second Chance...
"Because I was a sh*tty person."
"And I wish I hadn't been, but I became a good one after that and regret it cost someone so much."- Skelegasm
It's hard to come to terms with ending things with someone you thought you loved.
Yet, better to have had that love then to never love at all.
While all couples promise that they will commit to one another "till death do us part," not all couples are able to fulfill these vows.
Sadly, some couples learn after committing to one another that they were not meant to be married, resulting in a divorce.
For most couples, it's a slow discovery, as they begin to learn more about one another, as well as themselves, eventually shedding light on the fact that they simply aren't compatible.
For others, they discovered that their marriage was beyond salvation after one, eye-opening moment.
"Divorced people of Reddit, when did you know it was over?
A Worrisome Sign Of Their Future
"When her grandma died."
"It was her dad's mom and a wonderful lady, who died peacefully."
"Her dad called me sobbing, saying he was a mess and needed someone to talk to."
"I told him I would come straight over and then called my wife."
"Her response?"
"He was being over dramatic and she was with her mom (his wife) and they were ignoring his texts and calls."
"WTF?!?! "
"His mom just died."
"He is sad and alone."
"Went over there and hung out for a while and realized that if I stayed married I was looking at my future self."
"FIL is a good guy and treated like a stray dog."
'They have separate bedrooms."
"She hates him."
"Has made their kids hate him."- _Stamos
All Take, No Give
"We went to counseling."
"She talked about the things she needed and wasn't getting."
"Counselor asked me if I could work on those."
"I said yes."
"This took the whole first session."
"Second session happens a week later."
"I talked about the things that I needed and wasn't getting."
"Counselor asked her if she could work on those."
"She kept avoiding and redirecting."
"On the drive home she said she wanted to find a new counselor, this one wasn't the right one."
"Went to a new counselor a few weeks later."
"First session was a repeat."
"So was the second."
"She said we should find a better counselor."
"I asked 'one that agrees with you?'"
"And she said yes."
"Then I was done."
"Yes, I'm doing much better now."
"We don't keep in touch, but I think she is too."
"I don't want to make it seem like she was terrible and I was a saint."
"We were a bad match."
"This was just the point I knew we couldn't fix it."- PatrickKieliszek
When You COULD Wait To See Them Again
"Driving home from work, coming around the corner, and feeling disappointment to see her car in the driveway."- lucky_ducker·
Filled Their Heart With Anything But Joy
"When I realized I was more at peace when he wasn't around."
"I was calmer, less anxious, and smiling more."
"Also, when I realized I would smother my smiles or hide happy news so he wouldn't have a chance to ruin whatever I was enjoying."- LurkSmurf
Not Their Only Love
"My ex thought I was working out of town."
"She had been having an affair for about three months and totally thought I didn’t know and she had me buffaloed."
"This was way back before cell phones, but she had been call forwarding our phone to her new boyfriends number so when I called her I would think I was reaching her at our apartment."
"I came home about 10:00 pm one evening and she wasn’t home, I called her boyfriend's number, and she answered the phone."
"I asked her what she was doing and she told me she just climbed into bed for the night, I asked her whose bed she climbed into."
"There was a long pause."
" I told her I knew what she was doing and where she was."
"The last thing I said to her was that I was leaving my wedding ring on the nightstand on her side of the bed."
"That was over 40 years ago."
"Been married to a wonderful woman for a very long time now, all is good."- wyoflyboy68
Just One Of Those Nights...
"It was weird."
"I was sitting on the couch, and she was in the recliner."
"I looked at her, and it was like I didn't even know her."
"I thought... I don't like you and I wouldn't even date you now."
"We just grew apart."
"I said, 'do you want to break up?'"
"She replied, 'I thought you'd never ask... yep. It's been over for awhile'."
"It was amicable, and we went our separate ways."
"No hard feelings it was just done."- TotalDomination1952
Sad On So Many Levels
"When he told me he married me to punish me for getting pregnant and he was going to spend the rest of his life making my life a hell because I stole his childhood."
"Friends, he was 24."- Puzzleheaded-War-113
Manipulative Games
"When she filed for divorce, but didn't actually want a divorce."
"That's when I realized I couldn't put up with any more of her sh*t."
"If she was willing to file for divorce (and thought I was going to pay for it all), I knew it had gone way too far."
"I spent the next two years trying to finalize that divorce with her trying to stay married."- Azzizzi
A Literal Sign
"Left work to drive home."
"Hour commute."
"Passed an apartment complex with a vacancy sign."
"Started thinking seriously about why I was driving home."- ReallyFineWhine
Love can be very confusing and misleading.
Sometimes, we think we're in love and discover much too late that we were wrong.
Other times, even if love was genuine, it wasn't enough to fix something which couldn't be unbroken.
Love isn't forever.
That is a sad truth for many.
But when the relationship ends, let it end.
And then talk about it with everyone.
Give up the drama.
Redditor Specialist-Crazy1466 wanted to hear why and when the love ended, so they asked:
"Why did you and your ex break up?"
I always knew when it was over, but I always held on too long.
"I'm also a 'She that got fed up with being taken for granted", but I'd forgive him if he offered me an honest apology. Hell, I'd take him back if he really showed me that he cares. What I'm saying is - if she's not in a new relationship and you still love her, you might try and reach out. Life is too short.'"
GuinevereduLac
The Lease
"She brought a guy home with her one evening and told me I had an hour to pack my s**t and get out. I reminded her that the lease was in my name, not hers."
"Imagine the look of shock when I told her to get out."
"She saw my kindness towards her as a weakness she could exploit. I was very forgiving of her bad habits, and she pushed me to the point where she obviously thought I would let her stay in my apartment if she told me to get out."
"In hindsight, being that forgiving was my fault."
Precipice_01
Don't Worry Though
"I found pictures of her doing some other dude in our bed while I was gone for work. 5 years of my life down the drain."
"Don't worry though. Was painful at first but ended up being the best thing that ever happened to me. Got me out of an unhealthy relationship with someone who clearly didn't really love me, and freed me up to meet the real love of my life, who I just proposed to 😁."
Skwerilleee
Honesty Wins
"I didn’t have my sh*t together yet and was selfish and unreliable. She thought she deserved better, and back then, she was right. I’ve come a long way since then."
bunkermunkee
"Huge props to you for being honest and having the self-awareness now to openly admit and accept that. I obviously don't know you but it's not easy for a person to admit that they were the bigger contributor to the relationship ending. You should be proud of your personal growth at the very least."
Mecomaker
He Chose Her
No Way Do Not Want GIF by Schitt's CreekGiphy"His mom slapped me. I was tired of being abused by the b**ch so I told him he couldn’t keep both of us in his life. He had to choose me or his mother. He chose his pregnant mistress."
TheUrbanFarmersWife
Hands off. No touching others.
Whoops
Schitts Creek Oops GIF by CBCGiphy"My ex-wife filed for divorce to teach me a lesson, thinking I would try to stop the divorce. She was piping mad when I didn't, though."
Azzizzi
A Magical Time
"My ex and I were together for 14 years and it was a magical time. However, once the pandemic hit he took up smoking crystal meth at home while I was away at work all day. He became absolutely addicted, stopped taking his schizophrenia medication, and the psychosis and paranoia took over. Living with him became a horrific nightmare I wouldn't wish on anyone."
"I tried everything to get him to help but he wouldn't budge or acknowledge the depths of his despair. After 5 months of living with this madman who was once my best friend and partner in life, I had to move out and start my life all over from scratch. I still can't believe how quickly it all unraveled. Now he's homeless and living downtown in some bushes in a park."
Mythic_Damage777
SURPRISE!!
"3 months of long distance. She gave me a 'summary' of her week via text."
"I spent the first few weeks trying to engage in conversation only to be ignored for another summary."
"I spent the next few months asking if we could just enjoy casual messages that flowed in a natural conversation to mimic how we spoke when we were in the same city."
"After 2 months of not being listened to, I called her up and broke it off. For some reason she was surprised."
merlinface
I Got Nothing
"I took time off from work to take care of her parents. Her mom died, and it hit her hard. I continued taking care of her dad, but she was so stressed she would go out with her daughters and friends from work to de-stress. After two years of staying at her parents' house 24/7 and right before her dad died, she told me I was a godsend and she wanted a divorce."
"She locked me out of our house and had the attorney she was working with declare I had abandoned it so she could keep everything. Turned out her nights with our daughters and with her friends were actually with her boyfriend. She got the house and the inheritance and a new boyfriend. I got nothing."
rollercoaster_5
When in Loss
Sad Rabbit GIF by Muffin & NutsGiphy"We lost a child and grieved in very different ways. He went back into active military duty and was gone for 18 months. I developed an addiction to sleeping pills and alcohol."
When he came home, we started divorce proceedings and he returned to the military. I checked in a rehab center and we went our separate ways."
No_Scale7584
The truth is... when it's over, it's over.
And that is never easy.
The truth hurts.
Unencumbered truth bombs in a break up hurts the worst.
Sometimes it's a surprise when a lover reveals why they're going.
Other times you see it coming and chose denial.
Either way, who cares?
The hurt is still gonna hurt.
So it's always a good idea to know the why and how, so that growth can happen.
Either we can change ourselves or keep a better lookout for the toxic the next round.
Redditor Turbulent-Visit-8741 wanted to hear the more somber ends to love stories, so they asked:
"Why did your SO break up with you?"
I'm just not in love with you anymore.
I wish I had had a better answer. But it was the only answer.
She Was Right
Idiot Reaction GIFGiphy"Because I was a f**king idiot and used alcohol as a bad coping mechanism, and it got to the point where I was a horrible person when I was drunk. I miss her but don't blame her for leaving."
Lopsided-Finger-7586
About Andy
"She kept talking about Andy at work constantly. When I finally blew up and asked her if something was happening she hit the roof and ended it. 2 months later in the announcements in the local newspaper guess who was engaged to Andy."
brothhead
"Lol they always think they’re slick, right? I had a similar situation, I guess she thought I didn’t notice how often his name came up or how she’d make involuntary facial expressions when someone from their school group mentioned his name. It is what it is man, I know the feeling."
SalsaSmuggler
She Deserved Better
"I was a drug addict slipping below the waterline, she was a middle class beautiful woman who deserves better than that."
Rumple-Wank-Skin
"Kudos for not instantly saying 'she was a *itch' or something like that. Taking ownership is a rare find. But it takes two, as they say, to make a thing go right."
"You BOTH deserved better out of you, and you deserved help when you needed it. (I certainly know very little about your situation so I apologize for presuming so much, but as a career addict, hypocrite, and know-it-all, it certainly sounds like something I was about to write myself….)"
TwentyCharacters2022
2 Fast
"I got way too serious way too quickly. I wanted to spend all my time with her and just smothered her. Its a bit embarrassing looking back at it now. She's the only relationship Ive had where I was the one who got dumped."
UnfinishedThings
"That almost seems like a right of passage for guys that are late bloomers. Every guy i know that's always been single and finally gets a girlfriend get way to clingy and scare them off. Doesn't matter what you tell them they can't help themselves."
CarmenxXxWaldo
"I did the same with my first relationship. I got super clingy and pushed too hard because I was immature. He ghosted me instead of talking to me though (this is before cellphones I’m so old lol). So I guess we were both too immature."
Alternative_Let_1599
Unoriginal
Not Funny No GIFGiphy"Met their soul mate that was a year younger than our eldest child (18) after 22 years of marriage."
LJRGUserName
"Oh God, I had a similar experience. 22 year marriage as well. They got married last year and she is currently pregnant. He’s 52 and she is 34. I also got the 'soulmate' explanation when I found out he was cheating. They’re so unoriginal."
Mahalo-808
Age is definitely more than JUST a number.
The Diagnosis
"I was diagnosed with autism and suddenly all the quirky things I did, and had always done she suddenly became noticeably uncomfortable with. Eventually she cheated on me."
Woffingshire
I’m feeling this one. Was diagnosed a few years ago and suddenly all my quirks and idiosyncrasies have an explanation, and now my wife (who used to love my quirks) is upset that I’m 'not doing anything to fix it.' Seems like she’s no longer tolerant now that there’s a diagnosis - makes me think that I’ve gone from quirky to broken in her mind and she’s embarrassed? Frustrated? Angry? I don’t know."
-praetorr-
Not Happy
playing broken heart GIF by Antoine DoréGiphy"After being together for 6 years, 4 of them living together, one day she said 'I'm not happy.' Packed all her stuff and left. Never seen her or talked to her ever since. I wish I could at least gotten a proper reason for it or just a talk about what went wrong."
MrKhinkali
The "Fun" Guy
"The manager that she had been spending 10+ hours a day with behind the bar just seemed more fun. Left me, the kids, pets and house to take care of and just disappeared for days and sometimes weeks. Found out Xanax was involved, which would explain the lapse in time."
"Wish she would have just broken up with me, rather than cheat for months beforehand. Should be noted that weekly I receive 'I miss you and I just want to come home' texts. Too bad I moved cause i couldn’t afford our place alone… no home for you to return to. Enjoy your screaming matches with the 'fun' guy. Since I moved on, my life has been unreasonably better."
No-Influence-9293
The Last Straw
"Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald. She loved it. I thought the biggest crime was the movie itself. We had a fight about it. The end."
"Jk. It's more complicated than that. A lot of tension was building up over the past year, but that fight made us realize we were very different people than we used to be and that things hadn't been working out for a while."
Akai1up
"When you're fighting over mundane things and arguing harshly about personal taste in movies, sh*t has gotten rough. I feel like there's a large lack of respect and trust at that point."
smileunicornsloveyou
Good Luck
Sad Season 2 GIF by FriendsGiphy"I had cancer and ultimately my arm removed at the shoulder. First it was 'I'm totally devoted to you' and 6 months later it was 'good luck.' This was 13 years ago. Still pisses me off."
Patri100ia
Some people are the epitome of cruel.
Do you have any similar experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
People Confess How They'd Respond If Their Partner Wanted To Try The Swinger Lifestyle
Are we all meant to be monogamous?
Does true love mean only one sexual partner for life?
These questions have been at the love forefront for quite some time.
There are so many people testing polyamory and joining the swing set.
But is that something you have to want from the beginning or can lean into later?
Some partners are discussing it seriously.
But how would you respond if your partner brought up the subject?
Redditor mysterywife901 wanted to hear people's thoughts on opening their relationship status, so they asked:
"What would you say if your spouse said they wanted to try swinger lifestyle?"
Reddit was ready to rock and work through this thought experiment.
Try It
Old People Senior Citizens GIFGiphy"I would laugh my senior citizen @ss off and tell him to go for it, but the viagra stays home."
Careful-Self-457
Pull On
"I'd know she was pulling my leg; she is even less of a people person than me."
primal_machine_22109
"You would be amazed at how many shy women are into the lifestyle."
Island-Potential
"But what if it’s someone else’s leg… their third leg!"
SeveralEmployer
For the Marriage
"I would laugh and laugh, as they would never say anything like that to me seriously. 'Hey, you know what, I'd really like it if my intimacy issues gave me a lot more stress and anxiety, what's the absolute worst situation I could put myself in.'"
SaltyDangerHands
"I hope you're actively working on your issues and getting better. For your marriage."
PicanteDante
"I'm not sure what about that you're taking so deadly serious, but they're not my issues, they're my partner's, and the whole comment is tongue in cheek. The whole point is that the idea of cheating would stress them out immensely, that's... that's not a huge problem for a relationship in which neither party wants to cheat."
"I'm honestly not sure if you're insulting me or genuinely wishing me well, but in either event, I assure you it's not necessary."
SaltyDangerHands
“This One”
"I’d be interested in discussing it but cautious. I don’t believe anyone can fulfill someone else’s complete set of curiosities and desires and I am not a codependent type who sets all my expectations of happiness on someone else’s shoulders."
"We could identify what she wanted out of that lifestyle. How frequently. How we’d handle things if there was any change of heart or jealousies. Basically just communicate and explore."
"I’m into a relationship to help each other have the best life possible. Not to be 'the one' who has the expectation of being everything I dream them to be."
darinfjc
Good Luck
beyonce queen GIFGiphy"Help them pack their bags. I'd even help them load the bags in the car, and give them a hug, and tell them, Best of luck, because they're going to need it."
TripleAWingingIt
It certainly isn't for everyone. But communication and boundaries do seem to be key.
Contract Change
Sign Here Go Ahead GIF by Kat DurstGiphy"Tell her our relationship was not built that way. You can't switch up the terms after you are already in. If we had started this way then I am for it. After we have been living as if we both want to be monogamous? Nah. I can just go be with other people without her baggage."
vivazeta
What?
"I'd be very confused. My husband is open minded in the sense that whatever consenting adults want to do in their relationships is fine, but he has no doubt that he only wants a monogamous relationship. I'd wonder if maybe he'd been hit in the head."
Potential-One-3107
Let's Chat
"When she brought it up I said let’s talk about it. We talked through it for several months and decided to give it a try. It’s only been about 6 months and our relationship is better than ever. The communication we are experiencing as a couple is amazing, she is more my best friend than ever before. We have a complete open and honest relationship now."
tbed64
YASSS!
"Lessf**kinggoo! I mean 'sure honey, let’s try it out.' The wife and I communicate well. I’d be open to discussing it. We’ve had threesomes before. Communication and setting clear boundaries is key. The moment either one of us is uncomfortable or not cool with it, we both stop and Chuck it up as an experience we won’t be repeating. I’m not the jealous type and after 15 years of marriage have a solid foundation."
WindowlessCandyVan
Who are you?
What The Reaction GIF by MOODMANGiphy"I'd wonder who replaced my wife with a robot. She's got a very strict moral system and couldn't imagine doing something like that. Actually, neither could I."
Totalherenow
Now This?
"If they want to see other people they can just tell me they’d like to break up instead. No need to be so roundabout in telling me I'm no longer good enough."
"Why be in a relationship if you don’t want to be exclusive? That’s the whole point, unless you’re doing some kind of arranged / immigration marriage there was never any love in to begin with."
Yukisuna
If you're gonna do it, make sure you communicate and set some ground rules.
Well, dear reader, how would you respond in this situation? Let us know in the comments.