When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
Giphy
Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
homer simpson episode 23 GIF
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.
People Share The Dumbest Things People Have Said To Them
People say and do stupid things, but sometimes they're so dumb that our very faith in humanity shatters into tiny bits - like stopping on a highway out of respect for a funeral going the opposite direction, or using "xoxoxox" as a signature in a work email to a client. We've come a long way as a species, but like... WTF?
SmokeyBare asked, What made you say "f*ck, people are dumb"?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
Apparently dogs only understand English.
A girl in one of my college classes didn't understand how dogs in Spain understood their owners. She thought dogs only understood English and were just lost as hell in any other country.
nate800
This person drives for a living.
I once had a Lyft driver who could not wrap her mind around the fact that people in Australia drive on the left side of the road. "How do they even do that without getting into an accident?!" I lost some of my faith in humanity that day.
LosGatosMalos
Not surprising in the least.
Worked at a Starbucks in a mall a few years ago. Some of the stores were going to be closed for Easter, and they had a list of those stores on signs all around the store way ahead of time.
Lady walks up to me at the register and asks if I know what stores will be closed.
I tell her I don't know them all but that there's a sign right behind her with a list to which she promptly responds with "I don't read signs" then expects me to tell her what she wants to know.
I couldn't hold my laughter after that.
tjcoolkid
Can confirm.
Bartending for the past 14 months has really helped me with my staircase wit. I would recommend everyone try bartending, but bartending also taught me how stupid people can be.
snickerDUDEls
We've all met this lady.
I've met this lady.
I worked at a tea house. We closed for private events. When we did, it usually meant we closed early. The catch was that the guests still needed to get inside, so we closed the doors but didn't lock them. Signs were posted outside, directly in the path of the door, on big sandwich boards, explaining we were closed for a private party.
The party starts, gets going, and everyone has arrived. They have their tea, they're having a blast. Two hours in, this lady trips over our sign, moves it out of the way, and drags the door open. I'm watching her do this, feeling what little faith I had left in humanity drain away, pray she'll get it together and stay outside. But no, she's determined. She's getting her $7 coffee even if she has to chip a nail to do it.
She gets inside, straightens her coat, huffing at me. "You're so unwelcoming, making it so hard to get inside! Anyway, I want—,"
Jesus, she's actually trying to order. At this point, the party is starting to notice. She doesn't belong, she isn't here for their baby shower or bridal shower or whatever.
"Oh I'm sorry, we're closed!" I'm trying to be nice. I've had the face on all day, surely it will withstand her and my inner anguish will stay under the surface, right.
"No, I want my latte," she just brushed it aside. Maybe she didn't hear me.
"I can't do that for you, we're closed for a private party, I'm sorry!"
"Um, what?" Disbelief. Shock. It's starting to sink in through her inches of make up and cloud of self-entitlement-scented perfume. She's being told no? Perish the thought.
"Yeah, like the sign you moved out of the way said, we are closed for a private party. I will not serve you today." Polite. Firm. Passive aggressive. I'm supposed to be the one staff here that's good with the difficult customers. Keep it together!
"Ugh, whatever! Like, I don't read signs! Your coffee isn't even that good anyway, I was just supporting you people because you're foreign!"
She left in a huff, stumbled around the sign again, and walked down the block to Starbucks.
What a piece of humanity.
m4ttr1k4n
Professionalism 101.
Trained up a new girl at work, over the period of a few weeks. Emphasized that one of the most important things in the role is attention to detail. Wording things correctly, showing pride in your work etc.
Day 1 without me, begins sending emails to customers that look like they were written by a 6-year-old. Using the letter 'U' instead of 'you', 'thx' instead of 'thanks' & xoxo at the end of her signature.
I laughed so, so hard. She was fired two days later.
TISM_riverphoenix
Darwin award.
Last night, driving home from a friend's place, this dude on a bike -- no helmet, no lights, no reflective gear, wearing black, at night, riding in the fast lane of a multi-lane highway where bikes are prohibited, turning at a light against the red, while talking on the phone.
Yoglets
Same.
Someone who had been trying a 'Mediterranean diet' on the advice of their doctor managed to put on 15kg in the 4 weeks since they were advised to do so.
The classic 'fish and vegetables' approach they had fervently adhered to had comprised of eating nothing but deepfried fish and chips from the local chippy.
Every day.
For four weeks.
barneylow
Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
The Cleveland Balloon Disaster of 1986.
At that time, the City of Cleveland attempted to set a Guinness World Record by releasing over one-and-a-half-million balloons into the sky from one location.
The resulting cloud was so thick that it temporarily shaded out the sun over part of the city. Many of the balloons went straight into Lake Erie, which interfered with a very urgent Coast Guard search and rescue mission. The victims were found dead several days later.
Most of the remaining balloons drifted up to Canada, where they promptly deflated and littered natural areas en masse.
For weeks, the shoreline was covered in pieces of rubber.
The Guinness Book of World Records refused to recognize the stunt due to its severe negative impact on the environment. Many of the participants seemed genuinely shocked that the balloons eventually fell back down to the ground.
HighDingyDoo
Okay, this is really, really stupid.
My buddy and I were traveling on a highway with a 60 MPH speed limit but most people go around 70. Lots of long straight stretches, double lanes on each side with a large grass median that makes the highway more like an interstate. The road slightly inclines at a certain point and as we go over the crest we see two vehicles stopped in both lanes. My buddy slams his brakes and I think we're definitely going to plow into them. He stops inches from a car and then I hear tires squealing behind us as a large truck barrels our way. I thought we were gonna die. My friend angles his truck just enough that we don't get ran over. Behind us is total chaos as vehicles slam their brakes. So why were these two vehicles stopped in the middle of both lanes?
A funeral procession was traveling in the opposite direction down the highway and they stopped out of "respect." Remember a large grass median separated the two sections so you could barely even determine it was a funeral procession at all. I couldn't believe the absolute stupidity of the two cars that stopped. I understand showing respect but you cannot come to a complete stop on a highway on which people are going 70 MPH. They almost injured/killed multiple people due to their show of respect.
Metroid_PrimeRib
Interest-ing
I had an ex that financed all her furniture for a new house. I got a call from her a few months later saying " did you know when you finance something you end up paying WAY more than an item is worth". Felt bad for her.
Badatthis28
Dino-mighty Big Mistake
This reminds me of the beached whale in Oregon in the 70's that was blown up with dynamite and it went so much worse than anticipated. They used way too much dynamite and it rained down decomposing whale bits all over beach goers and even flattened a car or two. Not sure what they were thinking and now they dispose of whales in a much safer fashion.
randominiquelouise
"A beached whale in one big piece is too heavy! We have to make it into smaller pieces. Cutting it up will take too long. Let's just stuff a bunch of dynamite up in there. What could go wrong?" Maybe they thought it would explode into teeny tiny pieces and burn up completely in the explosion? Too bad that isn't how any of that works
coolerdog
News Vampires
This reminds me of an incident from the early 90s (I think) when a commercial airliner went down. It turned out that a very large family were all on the plane together, going back to the old country to visit relatives. Some poor woman here in the US had just lost 17 family members in the crash. They cut to on-the-street camera footage and all you could see was this crying, elderly Asian woman pushing through a throng of cameramen trying to get to her car. It was repugnant. And being the vampires they are, the TV news editors *still* chose to air those 5 seconds of video. Just awful. I don't watch TV anymore.
scarabic
i've been a 911 dispatcher for almost 30 years, and when the news stations would want a copy of a 911 tape released, you could literally see their disappointment if the person wasn't hysterical. we had one where a toddler was shot by a bullet that came through the wall from the next apt. when they found out the mother wasn't screaming and upset when she called 911, they literally got up, said they didn't it, and walked out.
JohnDeereWife
Ride The Wave
Finding out people who can't swim will take their children who also can't swim to water parks and get into the wave pool expecting tubes and floaties to keep them alive.
Wave pools are dangerous enough, even for people who CAN swim. Why would anyone who can't swim willingly get into one? Go to a waterpark, sure! But stick with the shallower rides that aren't full of waves designed to knock people around.
beepborpimajorp
Security Risk
Tl;Dr: A man tried to run full speed through the Disneyland security checkpoint, got clotheslined by security, and then was completely unwilling to understand why his family now wouldn't be allowed in the park due to him being a "security risk."
On my last trip to Disneyland, I was waiting in line to enter the park. Recently, due to stupid people doing stupid things, Disney has implemented a security checkpoint. This includes a bag check and a metal detector. It moves fast, it's easy, it takes maybe three minutes out of your day.
As I was standing there, from behind me, I heard the telltale sound of someone running in flip flops. I turned around and there was a family of five SPRINTING towards the checkpoint, all in matching shirts, looking like they were running for their lives. I think a parade was about to start, or something. Clearly their lives would end if they didn't make it inside in time to see the old man from Up waving on a float.
The mom and the three kids slowed down a little to find a security line. The dad didn't. Desperate times called for desperate measures. If he didn't get Little Jimmy inside in time to see Moana SHIT WAS GOING TO HIT THE FAN.
The dad blew straight past the bag check, jostling a few people, and continued right through the metal detector. The alarms went off, but he didn't stop. Not yet.
A security guard jumped in front of him, threw out an arm, and clotheslined his a**.
By the time I got through the line, they had pulled the guy and his completely MORTIFIED family off to the side, and were attempting to escort them out of the park. The guy was confused, angry, and volatile. What did they MEAN he couldn't go in?! What did they MEAN he was now a "security risk?!" He's here on VACATION.
I ended up walking away, just close enough to hear an angry "BUT WE BOUGHT TICKETS!"
If I had three days and a powerPoint presentation I still don't think I could explain to that man what he did wrong.
By the way, the parade was baller.
SpelledWithAn_H