Image by kamalpreet singh from Pixabay

Well that was a close call. That is everyone's main life mantra. If you really think about it, you'll know it to be true. Everyday we live, is another day we've survived, and death isn't the only thing we frequently sidestep. I have lost track of the amount of times my heart has almost gotten me into trouble. If I had been able to be with the people I thought I wanted in the past, I'd be in a mental ward right about now. Dodging a bullet doesn't even begin to cover it.

Redditor u/Not-an-Ocelot wanted to hear about the times that have made people give some extra thanks by asking... What's the biggest bullet you've ever dodged?

Life is a field of landmines and we're just whimsically shuffling along. We have to be really. There is no way to always be prepared for everything at every second. That's why we should always do the simple part well... pay attention. Heed the red flags, throw down the white when necessary. Allow some folks to explain.

Pay Attention

joe jonas relief GIF Giphy

I was a teen driver not paying attention at an intersection at the crest of a hill with low visibility when the light turned green.

The car behind me honked and just as I was about to go a truck barrelled through the red light on the perpendicular road at decidedly ludicrous speed. If I had been paying attention and gone when the light turned green, I very likely would have been T-boned to death. Closest call I've ever had.


A Passed Mandate

This one just materialized yesterday, actually.

About a year ago at my job I was offered to switch from my current team where I was established for a few years, had seniority, etc. for a new department that just started to kick it off, write processes, basically start from square 1. A lot more work for the same amount of pay. I figured forget it and went.

Yesterday they announced that they just closed the physical HQ office for my old department, and everyone in that entire part of the company would have to either move to one of 14 random states (that we cant pick, its chosen basically by a roulette wheel for where you're going) to a local office, or they're going to be fired on June 22. Thankfully since I'm part of the new department, I wasn't included in that mandate. Phew.


Too Many Idiots

I took my wife to an indoor shooting range in 2014. I had been at this range many times, and safety was always their top priority. They made you sit through a safety video, take a quiz, and get a temporary certification before they allowed you onto the range.

  • Place got really busy and their safety policy became less stringent as time went on.
  • I noticed that the lane next to us had 3 people in it (already a violation).
  • Two big guys and one tiny woman probably her in 20's. They were handing her various firearms and laughing when she couldn't handle the recoil (big violation there, and incredibly irresponsible).
  • This girl was muzzle-sweeping everyone (another huge violation)
  • I got a bad feeling, told my wife to pack it up because we were leaving
  • As soon as we started walking away, BANG, that girl had fired a round right where my wife was standing just a few seconds prior
  • I told the range officers that they needed to get in there and do something about those idiots, and that we weren't coming back

I have only been to a range a few times since that happened, and now I don't even go at all. Too many idiots.


buzz CRACK buzz...

I was out kayaking on a lake and several bullets whizzed by me. There was a distinct buzz CRACK buzz sound as it went by. I think some people were just out plinking in their back yard, adjacent to the lake, and didn't think a backstop was necessary. This also happened to me a few weeks later when I was paddling on a small stream. Bullets whizzed by above the bank, just over my head.

I don't think anyone knew I was there either time. Regardless, when you go out and shoot stuff, make sure there's a backstop, ffs. Also, I don't know how big the bullets were, so I'm unsure which was the biggest bullet dodged.


Well that was a lot to digest and ponder. And also... I may need a Xanax. But we can stay positive, everyone of those people lived to tell the tale. Personally, I don't think there is a number high enough to count how many car accidents I and many others have avoided. Thank you Jesus. Prayer seems to have gone a long way for these people.

Flight 103

I was booked on Pan Am flight 103 which went down over Locherbie Scotland. I didn't have a premonition or anything supernatural. I just decided to cancel my seat. Didn't think anything of it until the plane went down and my mother had written down my flight plan and reminded me. This was back in the day when you could cancel without a penalty up to a couple of days in advance.

EDIT: You Know, when I posted my response I didn't realize how many comments I would get that involved people who were impacted by this sad event.

On any given day, we make decisions (for no concrete reason really, like... I just chose not to go that day) and we come to learn it was a good decision. I try not to evaluate my decision because I don't want to affect my future decisions by second guessing or trying to 'work the odds'. This is only one example of times that I dodged a significant bullet. (I wrote a different post, but erased it before I hit save).



Season 4 Zap GIF by Rick and Morty Giphy

I was subletting an apartment in college and got zapped by the electric stove. Gave notice immediately and moved out with very clear reasons why I was moving out. The building burnt a few weeks later.



2005, my friend and I evacuated New Orleans 2 days before Hurricane Katrina and drove to Mississippi with the little money we had. We were trying to decided on where to stay for the night and it was between a mid range hotel or the really cheap motel. Decided to spend a little more for the hotel. During the night the eye of the storm came through Mississippi and flattened the roof of the motel we decided against.


Delete Tinder

I matched with a guy on Tinder who played for the Atlanta Falcons. He was really charming and seemed nice. He asked me to fly down to Atlantic City for Memorial Day weekend, said he would pay for everything (airfare, hotel, food, etc.) but I had never met him before and he refused to give me his phone number. I was uncomfortable flying to meet a stranger so I told him no. Two weeks later he was on the news for kicking (and killing) his girlfriend's dog.


Life lesson #3005... try not to become an episode of Dateline NBC. And being a local news isn't always fun either. Granted disaster and horror is going to happen but let's do all the avoiding possible. Being the one to walk away is always best. take it from experience.

A Yamaha Pancake

Physically? A bus. I grew up in Bermuda, and since it is such a small island cars are limited to one per family, and everyone drives mopeds. I was driving into town, and came up to a red light behind a bus. As is tradition, I scooted around the bus to be in the front of the line of traffic. Literally 2 seconds later a second bus smashed into the back of the first bus at like 30 mph.

I would have been pancaked. Without question, 100% dead. I just sat on the side of the road for a bit and thought about my mortality.

My only other Bermuda bus based encounter was driving home from my first job in the rain. An oncoming bus in the opposite lane went through a massive puddle and sent what looked like a tidal wave of water right at me. It literally picked me and my little yamaha v 50 right up and swept us off the road onto some grass.



phaedra parks bye felicia GIF by RealityTVGIFs Giphy

My ex.

He got engaged right after me and proceeded to cheat on her the entire time until she broke up with him.


Oh man, after reading all of that it's a wonder anyone lives to be a senior citizen and now we've got Covid. Be careful out there my peeps. Stay vigilant and wash your hands. Just don't wash them in a shady gas station restroom in darkly lit areas. A little red flag to think about.


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Image by Clker-Free-Vector-Images from Pixabay

Have you ever been reading a book, watching a movie, or even sitting down for a fantastical cartoon and began to salivate when the characters dig into some doozy of a made up food?

You're not alone.

Food is apparently fertile ground for creativity. Authors, movie directors, and animators all can't help but put a little extra time and effort into the process of making characters' tasty delights mouthwatering even for audiences on the other side of the screen.

Read on for a perfect mixture of nostalgia and hunger.

AllWhammyNoMorals asked, "What's a fictional food you've always wanted to try?"

Some people were all about the magical foods eaten in the magical places. They couldn't help but wish they could bite into something with fantastical properties and unearthly deliciousness.


"Enchanted golden apple" -- DabbingIsSo2015

"The Minecraft eating sounds make me hungry" -- FishingHobo

"Gotta love that health regeneration" -- r2celjazz

"Pretty sure those are based off the golden apples that grant immortality. Norse mythology I think?" -- Raven_of_Blades

Take Your Pick

"Nearly any food from Charlie and the Chocolate factory" -- CrimsonFox100

"Came here to say snozzberries!" -- Utah_Writer

"Everlasting Gobstoppers #1, but also when they're free to roam near the chocolate river and the entire environment is edible." -- devo9er

Peak Efficiency

"Lembas" -- Roxwords

"The one that fills you with just a bite? My fat a** would be making sandwiches with two lembas breads and putting bacon, avocado and cheese inside. Then probably go for some dessert afterwards. No wonder why those elves are all skinny, eating just one measly bite of this stuff." -- sushister

Some people got stuck on the foods they saw in the cartoons they watched growing up. The vibrant colors, the artistic sounds, and the exaggerated movements all come together to form some good-looking fake grub.

The One and Only

"Krabby patty 🍔" -- Cat_xox

"And a kelp shake" -- titsclitsntennerbits

"As a kid I always pretended burgers from McDonalds were Krabby Patties, heck from time to time I still do for the nostalgia of it all. Many of my friends did the same thing." -- Thisissuchadragtodo


"The pizza from an extremely goofy movie. The stringy cheese just looked magical lol" -- ES_Verified

"The pizza in the old TMNT cartoon as well." -- gate_of_steiner85

"Only bested by the pizza from All Dogs Go to Heaven." -- Purdaddy

Get a Big Old Chunk

"Those giant turkey drumsticks in old cartoons that characters would tear huge chunks out of. Those things looked amazing, turkey drumsticks in real life suck and are annoying to eat."

-- Ozwaldo

Slurp, Slurp, Slurp

"Every bowl of ramen on any anime, ever." -- Cat_xox

"Studio Ghibli eggs and bacon" -- DrManhattan_DDM

"Honestly, any food in anime. I swear to god half the budget no matter what the studio goes into making the food look absolutely delicious." -- Viridun

Finally, some highlighted the things that aren't quite so far-fetched, but still far enough away that it's nothing we'll be eating anytime soon.

That tease can be enough to make your mouth water.

What's In It??

"Butter beer" -- Damn_Dog_Inappropes

"came here to say this. i was pretty disappointed with the universal studio version which was over the top sweet. it was more of a butterscotch root beer. i imagine butter beer to be something more like butter and beer, which wouldn't be crazy sweet, but would have a very deep rich flavor" -- crazyskiingsloth

Slice of the Future

"The microwave pizzas in back to the future two" -- biggiemick91

"I've been fascinated with those for years! They just look so good!" -- skoros

As Sweet As They Had

"The Turkish Delight from Lion Witch & Wardrobe. The real ones I had weren't bad but nothing special." -- spoon_shaped_spoon

"Came here to say this. I know it's a real thing, but I always imagined that it must have been amazing to betray your siblings over." -- la_yes

"You're used to freely available too sweet sweets. For a WW2 era schoolkid, it would have represented all the sweets for an entire year." -- ResponsibleLimeade

Here's hoping you made it through the list without going into kitchen for some snack you didn't actually need.

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Image by Sammy-Williams from Pixabay

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Image by Sammy-Williams from Pixabay

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