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People's Hypothetical Reactions If Their Partner Said 'I'll Marry You If You Lose Weight'

It's 2022, and fortunately, finally, more people have gotten on the proper body positivity train.

But there are still those who believe that thinner is better, and Reddit's ready to call them out on it.

One Redditor addressed this by asking:

"What would your reaction be if your partner told you, 'I'll marry you if you lose weight'?"

Concern or Love?

"My girl told me to lose some weight, but in my case, I believe she had the right to it."

"I am getting older. She told me she doesn't want to build a life to have me die because of something I have complete control over."

"I think there are legitimate reasons for someone to have that as a condition to spend their lives together. But if their reasons are 'no fatties,' then run away. They don't care about you."

- Gotd4mit

A Healthy Ultimatum

​"I can actually chime in as someone who gave something of a sort-of ultimatum like in the question!"

"My partner is obese (approx 250 at 5'9 / ~115 at 175). He's always been overweight but had recently gained more when I met him. It wasn't something that happened over the course of the relationship."

"The issue I have with it has nothing to do with being attracted to him or anything like that (definitely plenty attracted to him), it's health and function."

"He has an injury to his knee that already makes it challenging for him to climb stairs multiple times or run, but the extra weight exacerbates it. He has sleep apnoea which we believe is caused by his weight (CPAP hasn't worked, not interested in surgical interventions at this time and they'd ask him to lose weight first)."

"The impact this has on us now is that we sleep in separate bedrooms and can't do some activities together."

"We're going to have kids, so the future impact might be he'll genuinely struggle to look after or play with said kids (if he can't run around the yard with them, or just do all the physical things young kids require, for example)."

"He has healthy blood pressure, cholesterol, etc., for now, but being obese puts him at an elevated risk for a bunch of entirely preventable conditions."

"SO, fairly early on, I gave an 'ultimatum' that was basically 'by the time we get married, I want to share a bedroom, and I want you to be able to enjoy our kids' youth.'"

"To move from obese to overweight, he'd need to lose approx 55lbs/25kg which is a lot, and there's no real way of knowing how much weight he'd have to lose for the sleep apnoea to get better or his knee to work."

"I mean. I'm going to marry him anyway, and he knows that. But at least it's out there how seriously I take it."

"I try to support him even though it's kind of completely outside my realm of expertise because I don't think just saying, 'do this or I'll leave' is fair, kind, or going to get any of the results you're looking for."

- kitsunevremya

A Brutal Look in the Mirror

"I wouldn’t blame her, I’ve gotten fat as f**k."

- SergeStorms_offmeds

Something to Look Forward To

"I'd say, 'cool beans!'"

"I'm plodding away on my journey at 289lbs today... I'm down from 460 at my worst (somehow I seem to be getting away with it without any loose skin so far, which is a welcome bonus)."

"I am under extremely few illusions about the fact I still look like a fat sack of crap and my own relative attractiveness as a prospect, though. I mean, the mental image of a blubber-mountain jiggling and wheezing away over someone gives me the ick!"

"While I'm doing it entirely for my own sake, and I think it's essential to do so, someone willing to look beyond my current condition to who I am as a person and decide they'd potentially like to spend the rest of their life with me, isn't without value."

"As such, far from seeing it as a cruel ultimatum, it seems more like accepting the reality that I'm still just not there yet, but... when I drop another 50-75lbs and more importantly add some tone, I should start scrubbing up quite nicely."

- volster

The Reason Matters

"I think the reason they want this really matters."

"I had a morbidly obese mom who most likely died from being obese. It was very hard on her and me. I grew up with her crying about being overweight and the pain she was in."

"It got to the point where she first had to use a walker and then a wheelchair. She had a lap band surgery but managed to stay obese."

"I'm currently obese myself and have health problems related to it. I'm working on losing weight and have lost 50 pounds so far. I plan to lose more before considering dating again."

"Considering how hard it was for me to lose my mom and all her suffering, I don't want to date someone who isn't at a healthy weight or at least working on losing weight. I wouldn't fault someone feeling the same about me."

- brokenjasper

Self-Respect Has Entered the Chat

"If they word it in a way that they simply only want to be with me if my appearance changes, I'll tell them to f**k off."

"But if they're worried about my health and my weight is a part of that, then I'll be a little more understanding."

- CyberWolfWrites

A Tough Reality

"A person who won't marry you unless you look a certain way is a person who will divorce you if you don't look a certain way."

- Superman246o1

So This Is Love

"If I was super obese and my partner was trying to push me to be better, then I would take it to heart and work on myself. If I'm not obese and they are just doing it to attack me, then I would tell them to f**k off."

"I'd hope if someone actually cares about me and I let myself go that they would call me out on it. Being obese is nothing to glorify."

"A lot of comments are trying to justify in sickness and in health and that they would leave just because of the ultimatum but as a comparison, if your partner was a non-abusive alcoholic and wanted to get married, would you ask them to quit drinking before you marry them? Would you be offended if your partner asked you to quit drinking if you wanted to get married?"

"Both are self-destructive tendencies. I sure as hell would not be marrying a heavy alcoholic or someone obese but if I love that person I'd speak my mind and give them the opportunity to change."


Uno Reverse

"I'd say, 'Same goes for you. Let's hit the gym now since we're both fat.'"

- CommanderPringles

Addicted to Love Food

"My ex had a food addiction and I couldn't hack it. I did love her for her but I didn't fancy her in the end."

"I tried to help with diets and exercise since it had rubbed off on me also. I was over 20kg heavier than I was before I met her. Our whole relationship by the end of it evolved around this problem."

"We split up years ago, but straight away, I got back down to a healthy size."

"She tried to demonize me over it but in my mind, it's the same as a drug or alcohol addiction. It's not good for your health."

- LowerPick7038

The Importance of Attraction

"I literally just saw a thing about how boundaries aren't an expectation to be pushed on others, they're a defined plan of action for yourself. So this kind of scenario should play out differently:"

"A judgment, not a boundary: I'll marry you if you lose weight."

"A boundary: I cannot be in a permanent partnership with someone I don't find attractive, and I don't find you attractive at your current size."

- SickSigmaBlackBelt

Their Own Conditions

"I'm foreign. If I ever gained weight my entire family would be very blunt about it, in a non-mean way. Just, it is what it is. And if I don't like it. Well then stop whining and eat less."

"Anyway, If I thought I was an appropriate weight and my SO (significant other) demanded an even better physique... Maybe, but I'm getting something out of this deal. Probably sex stuff. And snacks."

"If you demand a king, I will demand a queen."

- FailosoRaptor

Relationship Practicalities

"In my most recent relationship, we had an issue where we were just different people. I like hiking, skating, and swimming. She didn't. Not because those activities weren't fun to her, but because she was physically unable to do those things due to an excess of weight."

"She wasn't immobile by any means, and in fact, I thought she looked pretty great physically, but the fact remained that if she had lost some weight and been more physically active we would have been able to do so much more together."

"Weight isn't just about looks. She was more than just okay in my eyes, she was beautiful. But her weight was an issue nonetheless, and I don't think I could start a relationship with someone of a similar weight to her again."

"It feels bad, but at the end of the day, there were certain things we just couldn't do, and no amount of positivity could change the fact that she couldn't go bouldering with me, or go on a long walk through a forest."


Immediate Weight Loss

"I can lose 200lbs right now... by dumping them."

- duhduhduhdummi_thicc

Healthy Boundaries

"I guess it depends on whether I felt I needed to lose the weight, and if they were nice about it."

"My ex-husband wanted me to lose weight when I was only 130 pounds at 5'5. He wanted me to go back to my 19-year-old anorexic weight of 95-100 pounds which wasn't healthy at all. And he was perfectly willing for me to become anorexic again to do so."

"The real kicker was that he was 330 pounds and wasn't willing to diet at all. So instead of losing the 30 pounds, he wanted me to lose, I got rid of him. Best 330 pounds I ever lost."

- foxylady315

While the question on its own sounds terrible, the subReddit understood that it depended on the delivery and reason behind the question.

Relationships sometimes require tough conversations, started out of love, and weight loss can be part of that.

But if someone is purely looking for aesthetics, they can go look for that somewhere else.

People Reveal The Weirdest Thing About Themselves

Reddit user Isitjustmedownhere asked: 'Give an example; how weird are you really?'

Let's get one thing straight: no one is normal. We're all weird in our own ways, and that is actually normal.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't all have that one strange trait or quirk that outweighs all the other weirdness we possess.

For me, it's the fact that I'm almost 30 years old, and I still have an imaginary friend. Her name is Sarah, she has red hair and green eyes, and I strongly believe that, since I lived in India when I created her and there were no actual people with red hair around, she was based on Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.

I also didn't know the name Sarah when I created her, so that came later. I know she's not really there, hence the term 'imaginary friend,' but she's kind of always been around. We all have conversations in our heads; mine are with Sarah. She keeps me on task and efficient.

My mom thinks I'm crazy that I still have an imaginary friend, and writing about her like this makes me think I may actually be crazy, but I don't mind. As I said, we're all weird, and we all have that one trait that outweighs all the other weirdness.

Redditors know this all too well and are eager to share their weird traits.

It all started when Redditor Isitjustmedownhere asked:

"Give an example; how weird are you really?"

Monsters Under My Bed

"My bed doesn't touch any wall."

"Edit: I guess i should clarify im not rich."

– Practical_Eye_3600

"Gosh the monsters can get you from any angle then."

– bikergirlr7

"At first I thought this was a flex on how big your bedroom is, but then I realized you're just a psycho 😁"

– zenOFiniquity8

Can You See Why?

"I bought one of those super-powerful fans to dry a basement carpet. Afterwards, I realized that it can point straight up and that it would be amazing to use on myself post-shower. Now I squeegee my body with my hands, step out of the shower and get blasted by a wide jet of room-temp air. I barely use my towel at all. Wife thinks I'm weird."

– KingBooRadley


"In 1990 when I was 8 years old and bored on a field trip, I saw a black Oldsmobile Cutlass driving down the street on a hot day to where you could see that mirage like distortion from the heat on the road. I took a “snapshot” by blinking my eyes and told myself “I wonder how long I can remember this image” ….well."

– AquamarineCheetah

"Even before smartphones, I always take "snapshots" by blinking my eyes hoping I'll remember every detail so I can draw it when I get home. Unfortunately, I may have taken so much snapshots that I can no longer remember every detail I want to draw."

"Makes me think my "memory is full.""

– Reasonable-Pirate902

Same, Same

"I have eaten the same lunch every day for the past 4 years and I'm not bored yet."

– OhhGoood

"How f**king big was this lunch when you started?"

– notmyrealnam3

Not Sure Who Was Weirder

"Had a line cook that worked for us for 6 months never said much. My sous chef once told him with no context, "Baw wit da baw daw bang daw bang diggy diggy." The guy smiled, left, and never came back."

– Frostygrunt


"I pace around my house for hours listening to music imagining that I have done all the things I simply lack the brain capacity to do, or in some really bizarre scenarios, I can really get immersed in these imaginations sometimes I don't know if this is some form of schizophrenia or what."

– RandomSharinganUser

"I do the same exact thing, sometimes for hours. When I was young it would be a ridiculous amount of time and many years later it’s sort of trickled off into almost nothing (almost). It’s weird but I just thought it’s how my brain processes sh*t."

– Kolkeia

If Only

"Even as an adult I still think that if you are in a car that goes over a cliff; and right as you are about to hit the ground if you jump up you can avoid the damage and will land safely. I know I'm wrong. You shut up. I'm not crying."

– ShotCompetition2593

Pet Food

"As a kid I would snack on my dog's Milkbones."

– drummerskillit

"Haha, I have a clear memory of myself doing this as well. I was around 3 y/o. Needless to say no one was supervising me."

– Isitjustmedownhere

"When I was younger, one of my responsibilities was to feed the pet fish every day. Instead, I would hide under the futon in the spare bedroom and eat the fish food."

– -GateKeep-

My Favorite Subject

"I'm autistic and have always had a thing for insects. My neurotypical best friend and I used to hang out at this local bar to talk to girls, back in the late 90s. One time he claimed that my tendency to circle conversations back to insects was hurting my game. The next time we went to that bar (with a few other friends), he turned and said sternly "No talking about bugs. Or space, or statistics or other bullsh*t but mainly no bugs." I felt like he was losing his mind over nothing."

"It was summer, the bar had its windows open. Our group hit it off with a group of young ladies, We were all chatting and having a good time. I was talking to one of these girls, my buddy was behind her facing away from me talking to a few other people."

"A cloudless sulphur flies in and lands on little thing that holds coasters."

"Cue Jordan Peele sweating gif."

"The girl notices my tension, and asks if I am looking at the leaf. "Actually, that's a lepidoptera called..." I looked at the back of my friend's head, he wasn't looking, "I mean a butterfly..." I poked it and it spread its wings the girl says "oh that's a BUG?!" and I still remember my friend turning around slowly to look at me with chastisement. The ONE thing he told me not to do."

"I was 21, and was completely not aware that I already had a rep for being an oddball. It got worse from there."

– Phormicidae

*Teeth Chatter*

"I bite ice cream sometimes."


"That's how I am with popsicles. My wife shudders every single time."


Never Speak Of This

"I put ice in my milk."


"You should keep that kind of thing to yourself. Even when asked."

– We-R-Doomed

"There's some disturbing sh*t in this thread, but this one takes the cake."

– RatonaMuffin

More Than Super Hearing

"I can hear the television while it's on mute."

– Tira13e

"What does it say to you, child?"

– Mama_Skip


"I put mustard on my omelettes."

– Deleted User


– NotCrustOr-filling

Evened Up

"Whenever I say a word and feel like I used a half of my mouth more than the other half, I have to even it out by saying the word again using the other half of my mouth more. If I don't do it correctly, that can go on forever until I feel it's ok."

"I do it silently so I don't creep people out."

– LesPaltaX

"That sounds like a symptom of OCD (I have it myself). Some people with OCD feel like certain actions have to be balanced (like counting or making sure physical movements are even). You should find a therapist who specializes in OCD, because they can help you."

– MoonlightKayla

I totally have the same need for things to be balanced! Guess I'm weird and a little OCD!

Close up face of a woman in bed, staring into the camera
Photo by Jen Theodore

Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.

Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?

But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.

It would be so great to be sure there is something else.

But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.

Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:

"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"


Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy

"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."



"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."

"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."

"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."


Take Me Back

"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."

"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."



The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy

"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."


This is why I hate surgery.

You just never know.



"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."



"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."

"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”



"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"


"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"


The Fog

"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."

"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."


Through the Walls

"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."

"She's quite alive and well today."


Well let's all be happy to be alive.

It seems to be all we have.

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."


"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."


Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314


"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.