Top Stories

Managers Reveal Times They Questioned An Employee's Excuse Until They Got Proof

Managers Reveal Times They Questioned An Employee's Excuse Until They Got Proof

Managers Reveal Times They Questioned An Employee's Excuse Until They Got Proof

[rebelmouse-image 18352385 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Think of the most outlandish excuse you've ever had for screwing up at work. Could you prove it? Did your supervisor believe you? Either way, we all have to cover our butts at some point.

JacobTheHobo asked, Managers of Reddit, what was an excuse an employee gave that you thought was 'BS' till you saw proof?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.

This is some serious dedication.

[rebelmouse-image 18352386 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

One of my colleagues said he would be late because of heavy rains. It turned out that he was living in a flood prone zone and he showed up to office shirtless because it was wet and soiled by muddy water, with a video of his car floating and totaled on the road near his house.

Dude either really loves his job or is already skidding on thin ice.

[rebelmouse-image 18352387 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

A family friend was trying to go to work a few years ago. Problem was, it was snowing so hard that he couldn't get his car out of the garage. His solution? Taking skis and skiing to work with them. Of course, there were parts he had to walk, but he skied a lot of it

Talk about having a crappy day...

[rebelmouse-image 18352389 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

When I managed a convenience store, a guy who was there didn't complete all his closing tasks until about 1 am (we closed at 11 pm). It usually only took about 15 minutes. He said it got super busy and someone had diarrhea in the middle of the store he had to clean up. He was known in the past for being lazy and finishing his job and milking his time to get more hours in so I really thought he was just saying stuff as an excuse.

Went back and watched the recording from the night before to be sure before I called him out though and I'm glad I did. You could clearly see about 20 people come about 10 minutes before closing (a dance or something in town was coming to an end) and one guy was leaving a stream of liquid poo around the store before running to the bathroom to try and clean himself up.

Hey, boss. I'm a complete liability.

[rebelmouse-image 18352390 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Guy was scheduled to come in for his first day. Got a flat tire on the freeway on the way in, called in, manager was cool and told him to take care of it and come in the next day. Next day rolls around and he calls in again, this time because his radiator overheated on the freeway. Even took a picture and texted it to management and HR. Manager, still cool, told him to come in the following Monday to give him time to get his car repaired. New employee is, of course, grateful.

Monday rolls around, and my manager gets another call. New guy was on his way and got into a car accident on the freeway. Manager got pissed this time. New guy told him to look out the window since our building was on a hill that overlooked a large stretch of freeway. Sure enough, off in the distance was new guy's car burning merrily away.

When you have an accident and it causes another accident...

[rebelmouse-image 18352391 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

15 minutes before her shift is supposed to start I get a call from the employee saying she had just been in a fender bender but she was alright and would be at work in 45 mins to an hour after getting the insurance info sorted. 45 minutes later I get another call. She wasn't going to make it work that day because her car had been hit by another driver and was totaled.

I didn't believe her until I saw the pics of the three-car sandwich with her car firmly squished in the middle.

Scars are the best receipts.

[rebelmouse-image 18352393 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

A guy in my public speaking class stopped showing up for about a month. Suddenly he reappears and says he got jumped and was stabbed 6 times and that's why he missed class.

6 times?

He pulled up his shirt to show the group of people who had huddled to hear the story. It looked like a grenade had gone off with how fast the huddle of people torqued their bodies away from the sight.

Yeah, 6 times.

Pretty funny but doesn't the car have more than one door?

[rebelmouse-image 18352394 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Not a manager, but a coworker showed up over an hour late because "A goose was guarding my car door."

He had a video on his phone. A Canadian goose, sitting in his driveway. Every time he'd approach the car it'd spread its wings, lower its head and begin charging at him honking.

Hilarious as hell and totally worth the almost two hours of solo work.

Uh... ouch.

[rebelmouse-image 18352395 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Guy I knew lost the tip of his big toe on a building site, someone knocked over one of those large concrete slabs things they have.

He was ringing his boss, who didn't believe him, so his asked the ambulance driver to turn on the siren.

Definitely not how I'd want to start my day.

[rebelmouse-image 18352396 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

One of my team was off for a week holiday, called up to say he'd fallen off a bed and broken his neck.

Yup. Neck brace, several weeks off work, rehabilitation. Remarkable how he was able to recover so quickly.

Genius. Not all heroes wear capes.

[rebelmouse-image 18350773 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Someone said they got a medical recommendation from the doctor for a sick leave, which legally will be giving them a paid day off... for.... wait for it..... being drunk.

Saw the medical chit "too drunk and hungover to work", called up the clinic, drove all the way to check out if the thing exists. Bravo, bravo.

People forget that jury duty often results in total sequestration from life.

[rebelmouse-image 18352397 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I was temporarily fired for not showing up to work for a couple of days. I had been called up for jury duty and was selected for a court case so I filled out a time off request form and faxed it to my supervisor to approve. When I got to the office after finishing jury duty walked into my bosses office brandishing: 1) my jury summons, 2) the original time off request form and the fax sheet and 3) paperwork from the court to prove I had reported for duty and served. He called my supervisor into his office and asked her about the time off request form. Turns out my idiot supervisor not only forgot to hand the form in but for the past couple of months, she had been carrying it around with her.

Guess he had no box of scraps to help him escape...

[rebelmouse-image 18352398 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I know a guy who said he was kidnapped by terrorists in the Middle East on vacations, he had the police reports and everything.

EDIT: for those asking why he would go on vacation in the Middle East, he said he was visiting family.

Apparently this is really a thing that happens...

[rebelmouse-image 18352399 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I had a similar sort of experience working at a Ren Faire one year. Other employee and I strike out to grab lunch, do in fact help a little old lady walk up the (Fairly uneven) trail away. This takes us awhile so we're about 10 minutes late to call. Boss is pissed, demands to know where we were.

"Sorry, we were helping a little old Lady cross the road."

Boss is incredulous until one of the other performers pipes up:

"No, I saw them, they were literally helping a little old lady cross the road."

Uh... it's usually a good idea to not run over boxes on the highway. This guy got screwed.

[rebelmouse-image 18352400 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I had a guy no-show one time. He called like an hour after he was supposed to be there, saying that he blew three tires while on his way to work.

Turns out, he saw a box in the road and assumed it was empty. So he ran over it... It was a box of drywall screws. They scattered, blowing not only the tire he hit it with but also both rear tires as well.

Apparently, lots of cars also picked up screws as they went around him before a fire truck was able to get there and block off the two lanes. He showed me a photo of him and a cop, standing next to a row of like 15 parked cars, all with flat/quickly deflating tires.

And that's the story of how my idiot coworker learned never to assume containers in the middle of the road are empty.

Points for honesty? No?

[rebelmouse-image 18352401 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I had an employee call me saying he wouldn't be able to make it to work because he was in jail. HR called the jail, and sure enough, he was charged with possession of a controlled substance and domestic abuse.

He didn't work out.

Wait wait wait... he went back to SLEEP? Bruh...

[rebelmouse-image 18352402 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

This one was me.

A few years back my birthday was on a weekend. I had taken Monday off work, but then Thursday night something went wrong. I woke up sometime after feeling really messed up with a sticky face, so got out of bed and turned on a light. My room looked like a crime scene. Nightstand knocked over, blood soaking my sheets, on the floor, smeared on the walls and door frames heading towards the bathroom, all over the sink, and staining a towel horribly.

I had had a grand mal seizure in my sleep, fell out of bed, and hit my head repeatedly on my nightstand, cutting it up real bad. Sometime after that, I got up and tried to clean myself up and went back to bed, but was still so messed up that I have no recollection of it (postictal). I then woke up sometime later to find the blood everywhere.

So I'm standing there, feeling miserable and looking at myself, thinking, "There's no way I can go into work tomorrow, but I have to let my boss know and I don't want him to think I'm just trying to extend my birthday weekend." So I snapped a picture of myself in the mirror, smeared with blood, face bruised and swollen, and texted it to him at like 2 in the morning with a message that I wouldn't be coming in due to having a seizure.

I then cleaned myself up, changed the sheets, and went back to sleep.

Heart surgery? Pfft. 'Tis but a scratch.

[rebelmouse-image 18352403 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Heart surgery on Friday (ICD device fitted), in the office Monday. Got called a bullsh_tter until I showed him the wound.

I'm sure he has no issues at all.

[rebelmouse-image 18352404 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Had an employee that took bereavement time because his mother passed away, okay it happens. Four or five months later he took bereavement time because his mother died, I was like WTF? He tells me he was adopted, his birth mother had just died, and the first one was his adoptive mother, okay wow yeah fine.

Six months later he takes bereavement time because his mother died, I was like your kidding me right? Nope his parents that adopted him divorced when he was 8, his father remarried when he was 12 and the new wife adopted him.

Locked IN the house? Yes please.

[rebelmouse-image 18352405 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Had a guy call me 30 mins before his shift started to tell me he was locked in his house and couldn't get out. When he finally came in he had a receipt from a locksmith and the old lock, which had had to be drilled out.

People's Absolute Worst Vacation Destinations

Reddit user ITSSAMMYG asked: 'What was your worst ever holiday destination?'

Couple trying to navigate a hiking trail
Photo by krakenimages on Unsplash

Traveling for most people is a wonderful adventure, full of new experiences, sights, and memories.

But even for the best travelers, there are bound to be some flop destinations along the way.

Keep reading...Show less

While we can all dream that there is the perfect person out there for everyone, we can also agree that each person is not perfect for everyone else. There are absolutely dealbreakers that would apply to one person and not someone else.

But most of us can agree that there are certain things that you absolutely do not say on a first date.

Keep reading...Show less
Rubber duckie with sunglasses in a pool
Alex Perez/Unsplash

People fighting with their own insecurities will go to great lengths to overcome them.

Unfortunately, some of those tactics come at a cost, especially if the endeavor to attain a desired status is a vanity project rather than an improvement of a person's well-being.

Keep reading...Show less

If Groucho was the witty Marx Brother, Harpo was without a doubt the wild one. His persona of the silent lunatic who runs around wreaking havoc is one of the most instantly recognizable characters in movie history. But just who was the man behind the character? The answer to that is much different than people realize.

1. He Had A Horrible Childhood

As a child, Harpo lived through a nightmare. Although his enormous family—including his brothers Groucho and Chico—were loving, they were also dirt poor in turn-of-the-century New York. Indeed, his domineering mother Minnie forced them to start scraping together pennies from almost the moment they could talk. The thing is, she did this in a VERY strange way.

2. His Mother Shoved Him Into Performing

While we now know that child stardom is a curse, Minnie Marx sure didn’t think so. She organized a singing quartet act with the rest of her sons...but they were missing their fourth singer. Desperate, Minnie recruited the young Harpo to come up on stage at the eleventh hour, pushing the shy boy into the spotlight. This went more horribly than anyone could have predicted.

3. He Had A Haunting Embarrassing Moment

File:Monkey Business lobby card 1931.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

When Harpo hit the stage that day, he immediately realized he had made a mortifying mistake. Still unused to performing, he was so nervous that, in front of his family and the entire crowd, he wet his pants in the middle of the performance. Unfortunately, Harpo soon discovered that this was only the beginning of his ordeals.

4. He Was Bullied Horribly

Harpo’s school life was somehow worse than his stage debut. When he was in the second grade, he faced relentless bullying due to his Jewish ethnicity—and things took a dangerous turn. According to Harpo, his tormentors loved throwing him out the window of their second-story classroom whenever their teacher left. This would have devastating consequences.

5. He Had A Second-Grade Education

When his classroom woes became more and more frequent, Harpo eventually had enough. After yet another time where his enemies threw him out the window, the young boy simply walked home rather than returning to class. In fact, he never returned, and Harpo had no formal education whatsoever past the second grade. Yeah, this wasn’t a good thing.

6. He Was A Mobster

After quitting school, Marx began a harrowing chapter in his life. He became a juvenile delinquent, roaming the streets of New York for hours a day, swiping whatever odds and ends he could get his hands on, and making both friends and enemies with members of various street gangs. He even played piano in a brothel during this time. But one way or another, destiny came for him.

7. The Marx Brothers Have A Strange Origin Story

Around this time, the Marx Brothers’ act started to evolve into what we know it as today—but few people know its strange origins. See, they never actually set out to be a comedy act. Their mother, Minnie, was still obsessed with making them a vaudeville singing group, and whenever the brothers started kidding around in the act, she chastised them and insisted that they stuck strictly to music.

Of course, this only helped create the prankish anarchy the comedy group became famous for...and they were about to become very, very famous.

8. He Had A Film First

File:Early marx brothers with parents.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

In the early 1910s, the Marx Brothers began developing their stage act in earnest, and this led to their first collaborative film, 1929’s The Cocoanuts, which starred the brothers Groucho, Harpo, Chico, and Zeppo Marx in all their glory and various stage names. Not only was The Cocoanuts a newfangled talkie, but it was also one of the first films to have an overhead perspective shot. But even then, something was missing.

9. He Was Eerily Silent

Early on, Harpo developed one distinguishing feature in the sibling act: He never talked. For the most part, his film career relied on sight gags, especially Harpo pulling extremely unlikely objects from his nearly ever-present overcoat. As we’ll see, there was a particular reason for his silence, but it sure worked. Within a few years, the Marx Brothers were the talk of Hollywood...and Harpo took full advantage.

10. He Was An Infamous Bachelor

With the Marx Brothers’ comedy routine taking off, Harpo became one of the most notorious bachelors in 1930s Hollywood. One story from this time is legendary: He ended up busting into a costume party at Marion Davies’ house, while the starlet was still the mistress of tycoon William Randolph Hearst. And before long, Harpo’s reputation went from naughty to infamous.

11. He Gate-Crashed A Star's Party

For whatever reason, when he got ready for the party Harpo decided to dress up as Kaiser Wilhelm II, the former German Emperor and one of the most hated villains of WWI. Somehow, though, Harpo outdid even the Kaiser. Apparently bereft of any real friends at the bash, Harpo had to hitchhike home, and after taking a wrong turn, the authorities detained him for vagrancy, breaking and entering, and supposedly even impersonating Kaiser Wilhelm.

Harpo was definitely acting out, but there was a disturbing reason for this.

12. He Had A Long-Lost Love

File:Harpo Marx 1948.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

Even today, few people know that Harpo remained single for so long in Hollywood because of one incredibly heartbreaking and traumatic experience in his youth. Shortly after arriving in Tinseltown, Harpo started dating a woman he came to deeply care for, and he even planned on proposing to her. But before he could do anything, tragedy struck.

13. He Suffered An Unbelievable Tragedy

The very day before Harpo was going to ask for the woman’s hand, he received devastating news. His lover had lost her life in a plane crash, and he would never see her again. The loss affected him for years to come, keeping him at arm's length from any serious relationships for a good while after. But as for the not-so-serious ones, all bets were off.

14. He Used Women Shamelessly

Not even Harpo’s famous silence on screen could stop him from charming the skirts off of women. At one point, he was even dating fellow comedian Fanny Brice, the woman who inspired Funny Girl, “because he felt she would be entertaining, and he loved to be entertained.” Plus, you know, he didn’t want to think about his dead girlfriend. Yet like every Hollywood hotshot, Harpo had a wandering eye.

15. He Had A Fateful Dinner Party

One evening, Harpo was attending a classic Hollywood party at producer Samuel Goldwyn’s house, with Fanny Brice on his arm. Little did he know, his life was about to change. His other seatmate was the starlet Susan Fleming, a former saucy Ziegfield girl and a currently reluctant actress who hated making films. Fleming had her eye on Harpo—and more than that, she had a secret weapon.

16. He Had A Not-So-Secret Admirer

File:Susan Fleming sl931.jpg - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.org

In an eerie turn of events, Susan Fleming shared the same last name as Harpo’s long lost love who had perished in a plane crash. This probably got her foot in the door with Harpo, but if it didn't her face certainly would; she was pale with dark hair, and absolutely stunning by any measurement. More than that, Fleming was absolutely obsessed with Harpo...and she wasn’t shy about showing it.

17. He Loved To Be Worshipped

Fleming felt she could see through Harpo’s somewhat joking demeanor and into his sensual interior. She recalled that from the moment she met him, she found Harpo "a warm, fun, darling man to talk to" and that she was fascinated with his persona and career.

Harpo, for his part, wasn’t going to say no to a face like Fleming’s, and he threw off Brice that very night to take up with the actress. In the blink of an eye, it went from casual to cringeworthy.

18. He Had A Clingy Girlfriend

Susan Fleming didn’t just have a crush on Harpo, she had a whole obsession. After all, Fleming had no use for her film career, and she spent the next four years chasing after Harpo with an intensity and single-mindedness that would probably make anyone take a step back, let alone a man still on the rebound from his corpse bride.

But even though Harpo could have no doubt of Fleming’s affections, she still made a shocking grand gesture.

19. He Rejected His Lover

Fleming was so certain Harpo Marx was the man for her, she was actually the one to propose to him, an action that polite society considered near unthinkable for a woman at the time. But she was in for a cruel surprise. Although Harpo still wanted to keep up his relationship with her, the wounded man turned Fleming down. Did this let-down stop her? Not at all. She just turned the dial up to 11.

20. His Girlfriend Pushed Him Down The Aisle

File:Susan Fleming CM333.jpg - Wikipediaen.m.wikipedia.org

When Harpo turned down Fleming’s offer of marriage the first time, the actress really proved her mettle...uh, if that’s what you want to call it. Undeterred, Fleming got down on one knee again some time later, and received yet another brutal rebuff. Finally, she asked him an incredible third time and, perhaps worn down at last, Harpo finally accepted. Only, Fleming may not have known what she was getting into.

21. He Had A Secret Wedding

Maybe Harpo was still a little uncertain about Fleming, because he married her in complete secret. Sure, this might have been because the pair were notoriously camera shy—except for just one glaring thing. Harpo didn’t even tell his brothers it was happening until after the fact. Ouch. And when the truth did come out, it was scandalous.

22. The President Ratted Him Out

As it happened, people found out about Harpo’s top-secret nuptials almost right after they happened, and they found out from a shocking source. None other than President Franklin Roosevelt heard about the event from a mutual friend, and inadvertently leaked the secret by publicly sending Marx a congratulatory telegram. What a dummy, right?

23. His Wife Was His Subordinate

The beginnings of Harpo’s marriage to Fleming seemed idyllic. She quit acting in films like she had wanted to all along, and they began raising a brood of adopted children. Then again, their dynamic would still make a lot of us squirm; Fleming was Harpo’s self-appointed “valet” during the union, basically acting as his assistant when they were at home or abroad. Ew.

24. He Was Actually Bald

File:Debbie Reynolds Auction - Harpo Marx signature historic ...commons.wikimedia.org

When you picture Harpo, you probably aren’t picturing the real Harpo. Few people know or remember it, but for most of his films with the Marx Brothers, Harpo was wearing a blonde or red wig. Meanwhile, underneath that wig, the comedian was actually entirely bald, a fact that helped him go undetected in public whenever he felt like it, because people never recognized him.

25. He Went On A High-Profile Mission

In 1933, Harpo’s old friend Franklin Roosevelt made him one of the first “goodwill ambassadors” to Soviet Russia. It was even more harrowing than it sounds. On his way to Moscow, he passed through Hamburg and witnessed the early stages of Nazi Germany, and ended up literally vomiting at the harsh realities he witnessed first-hand to his Jewish people. When he reached Stalin’s Russia, however, it nearly turned deadly.

26. Stalin Spied On Him

Ever suspicious, Stalin assigned a government spy to accompany Harpo at all times during his stay, monitoring all of his phone calls and mail and making sure he didn’t get out of line or carry any important information back to the United States with him for the President’s eyes. It sounds like paranoia, but the truth is the Soviets DID need to worry about Harpo.

27. He Was A Secret Agent

Harpo had one unsupervised moment in the Soviet Union: His visit to the American embassy. Behind its closed doors, Marx kept a huge secret. While there, a government official asked him to smuggle a document back to the States. Though he never found out what the document was, Marx taped the envelope to his leg and successfully brought it with him on his way out of the country.

Yes, you read that right. This silly Marx Brother was an actual secret agent who carried out a real-life international spy mission.

28. He Got A Big Dramatic Break

File:Fay Wray Argentinean Magazine AD.jpg - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.org

Harpo was a bit of a strange husband, but he wasn’t always a good friend, either. One year, one of his good friends, the screenwriter and playwright Alexander Woollcott, asked Harpo to star in his dramatic production Yellow Jacket alongside King Kong star Fay Wray. It should have been a golden opportunity, but Marx turned it into a betrayal.

29. He Was A Terrible Friend

When Harpo read Woollcott’s script, he simply didn’t understand the vision or emotional core that his friend was going for. Of course, Woollcott also refused to explain it to him. Perhaps a tad tetchy with his buddy, Harpo reacted by not taking the performance seriously at all, and instead turned it into a comedy bit, infuriating Woollcott and nearly ruining their friendship in the process.

30. He Could Out-Weird Anyone

Harpo was infamous for some eccentric habits during his single life, especially picking up semi-vagrant artists. He actually spent over a year living with piano virtuoso and severe insomniac Oscar Levant, one of old Hollywood’s most bizarre characters and least stable people, who you may know from the film An American in Paris. Yet, as always, Harpo managed to give Levant a run for his money.

See, when Levant showed up on Harpo’s doorstep and never left, Harpo simply...accepted it. The comedian befriended the troubled musician until Levant finally left on a whim 13 months later. But when it comes to Harpo’s neighborly antics, that’s the least of them.

31. He Lived Next To A Famous Composer

For a long time, Marx lived next to the legendary classical composer Sergei Rachmaninoff. His reaction to this was surprising. As a fellow music lover, you’d think that Harpo would feel lucky to get to listen to Rachmaninoff hone his craft, but nope. Rather than just be happy, Harpo got annoyed at the noise day in and day out...so he came up with a perfect revenge.

32. He Drove A Genius Mad

File:Sergei Rachmaninoff LOC 33969u.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

In classic Harpo fashion, Marx took this as an opportunity for an epic prank worthy of one of his films. He began repeatedly blasting one of Rachmaninoff's own compositions out the window as loud as he possibly could. Best of all, it worked. It got to the point where the poor composer could no longer stand it, and he moved to a new house just to get away from the comedian. Mission accomplished.

33. He Finally Spoke

Marx spent his entire career going to great lengths to never speak in public. But one night, all that changed. It was the evening he publicly announced his retirement during a 1963 live show. When the audience learned they were witnessing a legend’s final appearance, the entire mood of the room altered. Then, for the first time in his adult life, Harpo agreed to give a public speech...but, uh, maybe he shouldn’t have.

34. He Gave An Awkward Goodbye

In the end, Harpo spent several minutes reflecting on his career and his feelings about moving on, while the stunned crowd took in every word. The host Allan Sherman reportedly burst into tears when Marx confirmed that he truly was calling it quits, but Harpo didn’t stop there, interrupting Sherman when he tried to speak and generally just yammering on a bit.

As comedian Steve Allen joked about the speech: “Harpo wouldn’t shut up!” But hey, he earned it.

35. He Made A Famous Face

One of Harpo’s most famous comedic faces was something called “The Gookie,” and its backstory is perfectly “Harpo.” The face came about from his habit of imitating the mannerisms of a cigar store clerk from his childhood named Gookie. As Harpo remembered, when Gookie started rolling cigars, he got “so absorbed that he had no idea what a comic face he was making. His tongue lolled out in a fat roll, his cheeks puffed out and his eyes popped out and crossed themselves.”

Harpo would do an impression of this face on a regular basis as a youngster, just to get under the poor guy’s skin. Later, he incorporated it into every one of his screen performances.

36. He Launched A Mega Star

File:Marilyn Monroe photo pose Seven Year Itch.jpg - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.org

When the Marx Brothers made their final film, Love Happy, they ended up despising the result and almost never talked about it afterward. Predictably, it was a flop, but this very last film has a very big claim to fame. It launched the career of the one and only Marilyn Monroe. The then-unknown starlet had a brief cameo in the film, her first big on-screen appearance. The rest, as they say, is history.

37. He Clashed With Authority

Harpo was always a troublemaker. When theater tycoon E.F. Albee hired the Marx Brothers, he expected them to bow down to him and be loyal. Harpo’s response made the man’s blood boil. Stirring the pot, the comedian "innocently" appeared in a friend’s show at a small rival theater, and when Albee found out he dragged Harpo into his office so he could stare him down and intimidate him.

38. He Froze Looking At A Woman's Body

In his later life, Marx took up painting and became surprisingly good at it. Still, he did get one super awkward anecdote out of the process. Like many an amateur artist before him, Marx started learning how to draw by hiring a body model. But the moment the beautiful woman took her clothes off, Harpo froze and couldn’t continue. Which is exactly when the situation took a strange turn.

39. A Model Taught Him To Paint

As it happened, the woman Harpo had hired was actually something of an accomplished artist herself, not to mention cool as a cucumber on top of that. So when she saw Harpo’s distress, she actually got up and gave him a lesson about where to begin, calming his nerves in the process. Obviously, it ended up working out for both of them. I hope Harpo tipped well.

40. He Had Another Talent

File:Harpo Marx playing the harp (cropped).jpeg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

Harpo might be famous as a comedian, but he had another big talent: Playing the harp. Only, because this is Harpo Marx, he had to do even this with a twist. He only took up playing the instrument on a whim, and began learning to hold and play it by copying what an angel was doing in a picture he got from a corner store. Yes, this was the completely wrong way to do it, but that wasn’t all that Harpo got wrong.

41. He Messed Up Big Time

Harpo didn’t know anyone who could play the harp, so he had to learn everything by himself, top to bottom, including tuning it. Three years later, he discovered that he’d actually tuned it wrong, and had done practically every else wrong, too. He did try to correct this and eventually took professional lessons, but his instructors would often simply marvel at his unorthodox yet brilliant technique rather than teaching him.

42. Harpo Isn't His Real Name

Harpo’s real name, as many people could have guessed, wasn’t actually Harpo—it was Adolph. For reasons (surprisingly) having nothing to do with WWII, Marx actually changed it from Adolph to “Arthur” as a young adult, which obviously ended up being a good call once Hitler actually did come to power. But how exactly did he get the name “Harpo”?

43. Even His Nickname Has A Backstory

The simplest explanation is often the right one, and the same is true for Harpo and his nickname. Although some of the details are a little fuzzy, he almost certainly got the moniker at a card game from his friend Art Fisher, who referred to him as “Harpo” because...he played the harp. For what it’s worth, Fisher also gave all the Marx Brothers their stage names, minus “Zeppo.”

44. He Cheated His Music Teacher

File:Harpo and Chico Marx General Electric Theater 1959.JPG ...commons.wikimedia.org

Back when he could only dream of someday learning the harp, Harpo's family had a piano, but they could only afford lessons for one child. Somewhat insultingly, they chose Chico, not Harpo, for this privilege. But Harpo didn’t let that stop him. Practically everything Harpo learned about music, he got from secretly listening in on his brother’s piano lessons. Naughty boy.

45. He Was Obsessed With One Game

Marx became obsessed with croquet—to the point where he couldn’t live without the summer game, even in the winter. In one of his most ridiculous real-life antics, Marx bribed the landlords of a Manhattan parking garage to let him turn their roof into a makeshift croquet field. They initially obliged, but then quickly found out they had made an enormous error…

46. He Snubbed A Very Important Man

Marx and his crew placed such a high priority on their croquet hobby that they once intentionally kept New York Governor and future Presidential candidate Al Smith waiting on the phone for a whopping 20 minutes, just so that they could watch as one of the club’s members attempted a difficult shot. To the landlords’ relief, the fire department promptly put an end to the croquet arrangement as soon as they found out about it.

47. He Had A Fatal Flaw

Being the silent guy in the act can be fun, but Harpo once got cheated out of a huge deal. Because his character did not speak, NBC snubbed Harpo when they gave the Marx Brothers their own radio sitcom in 1932. In the midst of the Great Depression, Groucho and Chico each got paid more than $3,000 a week for just half an hour’s work, all while poor old Harpo could not participate.

48. He Created A Popular Expression

File:WilliamRandolphHearst.jpg - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

If you’ve ever used the expression “in the hot seat,” you might be surprised to learn that Harpo Marx originally coined it. During his social escapades, he attended parties at the famous mansion of William Randolph Hearst and noticed that whenever someone became less welcome, Hearst would seat them at the far end of the table near the fireplace. Being seated in the “hot seat” usually meant that you would soon stop receiving invitations.

49. He Almost Played A Whole Different Character

Today, it's extremely hard to associate Harpo Marx with anything other than his silent, clown-like, curly-haired character—but this almost wasn’t the case. Initially, the brothers had considered having Harpo’s character be a stereotypical, freckled Irishman named Patsy Brannigan, accent and all. I think most of us are pretty happy they didn’t stick with this idea.

50. He Had A Weird Obsession

Harpo was a strange man, and he had one weird quirk that he often took to extremes: An obsession with black jelly beans. Ever since his impoverished childhood, the candy had been a symbol of success in his mind, and as an adult he once purchased 30 dollars’ worth of jelly beans to snack on at the movies. Only, his grand excess didn't exactly go as planned.

The bag exploded and caused a huge mess for the theater staff—not to mention a fair amount of confusion.

51. You Can Hear What He Really Sounded Like

Although no known recordings exist of Marx speaking in public, it is actually possible for people today to hear what he sounded like. Someone found a copy of a home voice recording the comedian made while working on his autobiography where he recalls some of the crazy experiences of his youth. The recording confirms some surprising things.

First, Harpo sounds a lot like his brother Groucho; and second, he has a thick New York accent.

52. He Could Switch Gears

File:Harpo Marx Silent Panic DuPont Show 1960.JPG - Wikimedia Commonscommons.wikimedia.org

Despite spending his whole life as a comedian, Marx eventually got the chance to play a serious dramatic role. In a 1960 Christmas-themed television play called A Silent Panic, he portrayed a deaf-mute character who inadvertently witnesses a murder and struggles to decide how to react. The performance is available on YouTube, and is actually pretty darn impressive.

53. He Made One Sound On Film

Although he never had a spoken line in a Marx Brothers film, some believe Harpo did once let his voice slip in one of them. In 1939’s At The Circus, Harpo’s character releases an exaggerated sneeze by shouting “Ah-choo!” in a clear voice, though he could have been mouthing someone else’s voice. Even so, there is another instance people cling to.

54. He "Talked" On A Technicality

Sure, he never talked in his performances, but Harpo did actually have a line in a movie early on in his career—there’s just one problem. It was a silent movie, so the clip doesn’t get us any closer to hearing what he sounded like in a professional capacity. The clip consists of the silent Marx Brother soundlessly mouthing the words, “You sure you can’t move?”

55. His Marriage Miraculously Lasted

Despite being a Hollywood marriage, Marx and Susan Fleming shared a long, happy life together. More than that, he and Fleming adored raising their large family. Harpo once quipped that when it came to children, he wanted, "So many that whenever we go out, there can be one in every window, waving to us." So when Harpo did finally pass, he went out in an incredibly fitting way.

56. He Had Impeccable Timing

Fájl:Marx Brothers 1948.jpg – Wikipédiahu.m.wikipedia.org

On September 28, 1964, Harpo passed at the ripe old age of 75, leaving behind his wife Susan Fleming, his four children, and his beloved Marx Brothers. However, there was something special about this day. Always good with timing, comedic or otherwise, Harpo actually died on the very day of his 28th wedding anniversary with Fleming, which must have been a bittersweet event for the widow. But when his funeral came around, it was a full-on tearjerker.

57. He Ruined His Brother

As one of the elder Marx brothers, Harpo was also one of the first of his siblings to go, and the news particularly devastated his brother Groucho. Later on, Groucho’s son Arthur Marx recalled that Harpo’s funeral was one of the first and only times he had ever seen his father cry. Then again, that was good old Harpo; he’d make you laugh until you cried.

58. He Didn't Talk For A Reason

Harpo is best-known as the Marx Brother who never talks, but few people know the reason why. According to some, it’s because when they were first starting out in Vaudeville, the brothers had a stomach-dropping realization: Harpo had intense difficulty memorizing lines. Rather than trying to fix this shortcoming, they decided to simply make his character mute and have his comedy focus on pantomime. However, there may be a much different explanation.

59. He Was Insecure

Another story suggests that Harpo may have lapsed into silence in his film career not so much out of a canny choice, but rather because of a scathing review that he took to heart. After seeing him in one performance playing his usual foolish character, one critic noted that Harpo only achieved the effect he was going for “until he spoke.” The comedian fell silent from then on.