Employees Reveal Why Their Corporate Culture Prompted Them To Quit
Sometimes an idea wall is a very bad idea.
Working in a corporate environment is not for everyone. Some people thrive in them, others (like me) wilt and start to slowly unravel mentally. But what about those companies who pride themselves on their "alternative" corporate culture? We've all heard about companies that let you bring pets or have slides between floors, but even that isn't enough to keep some people there.
One Reddit user asked:
Redditors who left companies that non-stop talk about their amazing "culture", what was the cringe moment that made you realize you had to get out?
The answers are, honestly, kind of killing our hope that any corporate environment can really be different from the others. Having said that, it's also making us really thankful that we can write this article from our sofa while slamming guac and wearing no pants.
#PantsAreLegPrisons
Some responses have been edited for content/clarity.
Everyone's A Director.
GiphyThey changed the title of the receptionist to "Director of First Impressions."
Working WiFi Was TOO CRAZY
GiphyHad a "wall of crazy" where the CEO wanted to spend 20k on cool and edgy stuff for the office. Staff could make suggestions (Slides, beanbags, napping pods, etc)
Project was scrapped when the top suggestions ended up being:
- Desks
- Chairs
- Working Heating
- Working WiFi
- Health Insurance
Profits Up? Cut Bonuses!
GiphyI'm in management and we just got the message that bonuses for the last financial year were severely cut across the business, probably going to receive 30% of our usual - at best. Then I attended our financial end of year results meeting the next day to be told that net profits were 18% up (nearly 1 billion total) and the best performance in years, all thanks to us.
So even though our profits were way up, the bonuses were cut? Employees who were not upper management would never have that information. Planning on leaving now.
"Work Hard, Play Hard"
GiphyThey had an entire area devoted to foosball, pinball, billiards, console gaming, and videoke booths on the ground floor and it was clearly visible because of the glass windows on street level. Oddly enough, nobody ever used them, and the place was almost always empty save for a few people who use the internet kiosks.
When I learned a friend worked there, I asked why nobody would want to take the opportunity to use the awesome-looking recreational facility, he told me that people who do use the facility often found it used against them during performance evaluations, even when their use wasn't excessive at all. After a while word got around and they started avoiding the place altogether.
The irony is that their recruitment ads always touts a culture of "work hard play hard"
Like A Criminal
GiphyA co-worker was forced to work while her mother was dying in hospice. Mom dies, she quits, they escort her off the premises like a criminal.
"We Were Expected To Sing Along"
GiphyWhen I went to firm drinks in a public bar and the firm's "fun committee" handed out song sheets and a choir of employees lead by a bad guitarist sang a song about how great the firm was to the tune of 'Cause I'm Happy. We were expected to sing along. It was at that moment I realized I was in a cult.
M.O.N.E.Y.
GiphyWe (management team) spent months working with a business coach trying to collectively come up with meaningful core values. We devoted a ton of time to it and really tried to decide which direction we wanted to take the company culture. Everybody agreed on teamwork, reliability, a couple others that I can't remember now, and then one day the owner came in and called a meeting.
He sat us down in the boardroom and told us he spent all weekend brainstorming and had decided on the core values. They were:
Meaningful Ownership Neighbourhood Engagement You
Does anybody see what that spells? He literally wanted it to be money and just came up with words that sort of worked the way you do in elementary school writing your name poem.
He rebranded the entire company from t shirts with giant first letters and smaller letters for the rest of the word straight down the arms, to plagues, wraps on the cars, everything.
And that's when we all knew it was going to get bad.
Money is great, but it was mortifying walking/driving around with that plastered everywhere.
- NSDR1709
Banned From Saying The Word Bathroom
GiphyWhen we couldn't say "bathroom" on the shop floor and instead had to ask a manager for "serenity."
Family Values
GiphyNot me, but my husband worked for two weeks for a "family owned and operated" business that touted how important "family" was and that they were all one happy "family." My husband was on his way to drop our at the time 2 year old son off at daycare before work when son threw up all over himself. Husband called his employer to tell them what happened and that he needed to take son home and clean him up but he'd be in asap.
His manager told him he needed to get his priorities straight. He responded with "You know what? You're right, I won't be back in at all." He was still working part time at his previous job where they had been sad that he was leaving, so he called them and told them to put him back on the schedule full-time. The "family" business is currently in the process of liquidating assets before going out of business and I cackle every time I drive past it.
Shedding Tears For Apple
GiphyI worked for Apple back in their heyday and it was always constant and terrible. But one guy who was an assistant manager (or something like that) took time out during a store meeting to evangelize to us (his words) about how Apple was going to change each of our lives so drastically that we wouldn't recognize ourselves any more. About five minutes in to his proselytizing, the tears began to flow and he openly sobbed about how Apple was the greatest thing on the planet.
He was ultimately let go for being late too many times and had to be escorted from the store out the back door because he was crying and refused to leave his "home."
Locked Out
GiphyI am still working at the company but am job hunting.
It is a school for troubled youth. One of the perks it lists for the students is if they have a good week (no aggression and good attendance) then they get to hang out in the "club house" on Friday afternoons. The "club house" is never used for anything else.
The issue is none of the staff gets breaks other than the bathroom. There is no where to go. We would all love a break room and a place to eat lunch without students. Some students will steal or touch our food while we are trying to eat. It makes sense for the clubhouse to be a space that the teachers can use for breaks as well. But no.
Only two kids ever get to use it and only for 3 hours on Friday.
There is giant tv and xbox and playstation and fridge with snacks, but most of the time is locked and empty. Why can't we teachers use it too?
"Funshine"
GiphyWhen they decided to put the most inept, useless, waste of a human being as the head of the "funshine" club, I knew the place was dog sh!t. The idea was if we got cupcakes once a month we wouldn't want to hang ourselves in the office. Mind you, the dude was the CFO of the company. He just gave himself the title of "Chief Funshine Officer." Ugh.
Not Smiling Enough
GiphyWorked for a hotel, new managers were absolutely determined to create a different "culture" in the workplace. I realized I had to get out when a waitress got pulled aside and berated for about 10 minutes for not smiling enough. What those idiots didn't know, and never gave her the chance to explain, was that the waitress herself had been hospitalized for depression a year earlier, and her Dad died 2 months ago. I handed in my notice as soon as I could.
Poetic Justice
GiphyLate to this party, but I worked for a large foreign exchange at the head office. They hung awards they had won for being the best place to work all over the entrance. They had a really nice automated coffee machine (back when that was rare and expensive). They had a masseuse come in bi weekly.
The boss, however, would openly berate employees. He would sh!t all over me, and yet, I would get massive bonuses for doing a good job. His office was a floor below ours, and we all shared a large office; about 9 people in an office sized for 3. We had one front line support girl who was truly amazing. Super personable, pretty tech savvy, and always wanting to learn new things.
I worked there for 3 months. One day, she gets a call. I can hear his voice booming through the phone from across the office, berating her, and making her cry in front of her coworkers. Later that day, I called around, had an interview over lunch, and went to HR to quit. In 3 months, I had 4 pages of grievances. HR had never seen something that bad. They called previous people that quit and found out it was a pattern. He was fired later, and she was promoted to his job, basically from near the bottom. Poetic justice.
Building Up The Rhythm
GiphyThe CEO was creepy, not in a sleazy way but in a "barely human" kind of way. I'd love to know how these "almost people" types are usually in managerial positions.
This guy was a mixture of new age hippie, actor snob, businessman, arrogant rich bastard and just generally the type of person to use pretentious catchphrases and buzzwords to try to sound intelligent and "with it".
When I met him it was clear he had no clue who I was or what I was doing at the business. He gave me one of those airy "what the f^ck" smiles when we met like he'd never heard of an intern before. It was also clear he barely interacted with staff beyond the once weekly group lunches.
At these lunches, he made staff do presentations about their research on some plan/product he might want to invest in one day. But he'd continually interrupt their presentations with questions, and try to trip them up on their lack of knowledge. He'd also critique their "performance". He'd interrupt to talk about the employee's tone of voice, volume, stage presence and use the moment to brag about his own acting classes. Meanwhile the employees just wants to eat their damn lunch.
He also had these creepy ass introduction videos for newbies where he spoke about the "building up the rhythm of business" or some shit, at one point comparing it to sex which.......................................... ew.
Every morning employees had to stand in a circle and do some sort of action to "build up a rhythm" which was some sort of positive reinforcement motivation crapola. He was never present for these, and it was simply humiliating.
"Vacation"
GiphyWhen I was told that vacations only mean that one works 5-6 hours a day from the location you are vacationing at as opposed to the usual 10-12 hours a day from the office. Um, no.
I was also asked to carry a portable wifi to be able to work out of a hospital, where I was visiting a loved one.
"Optional"
GiphyConference was held in city where I have friends. I decided to have dinner with them rather than attend the optional games night (especially when we just had a mandatory evening activity the night before). I was told to go f^ck myself and my friends. By the boss.
Customers Watching Us Play Musical Chairs
GiphyWorked at a Best Buy and in the morning meetings we had to play stupid games to boost team morale 'culture'. The cringiest moment that made me realize I had to leave was playing musical chairs on a Saturday morning as customers waiting for the store to open were peeking through the windows and watching us.
Pubic Hair And A Ping Pong Table
GiphyWhen my boss undid his pants in the studio to tuck his shirt in exposing his pubic hair. Also when a ping pong table was put up behind my desk for devs to unwind with. The constant noise made me want to cut myself.
"We Can't Provide A 5-Star Product"
GiphyExtended Stay Hotels. Everything they did could go in a corporate horror movie.
Acronyms. Acronyms. More acronyms.
The company has spent the past 10 years whittling away property budgets to almost nothing. The reception computers are 15 years old, important stuff breaks and they won't fix it. One time the front desk printer ran out of ink and the district manager didn't approve a new order for 2 weeks. That's my bosses, bosses, boss in charge of approving our office supplies. They pay the managers nothing, they pay front desk nothing, housekeepers get 25 minutes to clean each room and also get paid nothing. And they have no clue why a housekeeping position opens and they get 0 applications.
The place is staffed to the bare minimum to save money. A 90 room hotel that has 1 person working, come on man.
They give managers bonuses if they spend under certain amounts. I've filled in at hotels that had no dishes, didn't have enough towels and one property that was putting sheets on the beds with cigarette burns because that was all they had.
Before I left my new district manager sent an email out that said "we can't provide a 5 star product but we can provide 5 star service!" That's corporate speak for "we want perfect customer reviews and we want you to do it with no budget!"
The entire company is ran by B-School grads who have never stepped foot in one of the hotels. Most of the initiatives have no chance of working.
Not that they care. All they see is the bottom line.
H/T: Reddit
People Are Roasting Trump Over His Mind-Numbing Observation About The Wetness Of Water 😂
Donald Trump thanked the first responders who came to the aid of victims of Hurricane Florence. The storm devastated portions of North Carolina, dumping massive amounts of rain and damaging millions of dollars in property. Many natural areas were destroyed, some farmers lost everything and more than a few people have been left homeless. The first responders after this massive storm were literal life savers, and Trump was absolutely right to thank them. Unfortunately, the sentiment of his message was lost for many people because he didn't seem to put any effort or preparation into what he was saying. Then, in the middle of his off-the-cuff message, he confused everyone by talking about the wetness of water.
AsTrump described the storm and the importance of first responders he told the world:
This is a tough hurricane, one of the wettest we've ever seen from the standpoint of water. Rarely have we had an experience like it and it certainly is not good.
The Tweet went out in the middle of the day on Tuesday, September 18th. At the time of this article, it hasn't even been up for 24 hours and already has over 13,000 comments. Many of them pointed out how Trump didn't even seem to try...
and how asinine his description was.
We don't know if Trump will continue to address the public by releasing these kinds of videos, or if they will continue to be as unrehearsed as this one is. We assure you, if they are, Twitter will have plenty to say about it.
H/T: Huffington Post, Twitter
Macaulay Culkin Is Having Fans Vote On What He Should Legally Change His Name To—And The Options Are Bizarre 😮
Have you ever wanted to help your favorite celebrity reach their potential by giving them a new name? Fans of Macaulay Culkin will be able to do just that, as he's allowing them to vote and pick his new middle name.
The choices are beyond strange.
Thanks for having me @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight !!! I'll let you know how the name change works out! https://t.co/iIkTC8OyXH— Macaulay Culkin (@Macaulay Culkin) 1543452222.0
In a segment on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, Culkin announced his desire to change his middle name to something else. He allowed people to submit names for the last month, and narrowed those down to the top five.
Some of the suggestions were interesting, to say the least.
@DevonESawa Weird. I'm about to change my middle name. Any good suggestion? Go to https://t.co/BYXGIWJK3g— Macaulay Culkin (@Macaulay Culkin) 1540529059.0
@IncredibleCulk @FallonTonight @jimmyfallon It should be "Culkin, Macaulay" as a middle name. Will be read as: Mac… https://t.co/xRo5AiR8jd— carmineenimrac (@carmineenimrac) 1543469371.0
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight How did you miss "Macaulay Skulking Culkin"?!— Caleb DAVIS (@Caleb DAVIS) 1543487990.0
@ComicBook @IncredibleCulk Pls add Cacaulay Mulkin as an option— Matt Michler 🌹 (@Matt Michler 🌹) 1543603411.0
@ComicBook @IncredibleCulk Kevin! Obviously.— Andrew 🐼 🐝 (@Andrew 🐼 🐝) 1543603516.0
The official choices: Shark Week, The McRib Is Back, Kieran (submitted by his famous younger brother), Macaulay Culkin, and Publicity Stunt. That last one was suggested by Culkin's girlfriend, actress Brenda Song, and gives away the game.
Fans are still excited to vote for his new name.
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight Macaulay “Shark Week” Culkin has a nice ring to it.🐰 Vote on… https://t.co/AS5ce275jl— Shark Week (@Shark Week) 1543526453.0
The moment of joy that hopefully comes to us all during the day just transpired for me and funny enough, it took le… https://t.co/stOVPePmpy— Sia Brooks (@Sia Brooks) 1543606608.0
Macaulay Culkin Needs A New Middle Name https://t.co/HO9ZMUM1O1 via @bunnyearsweb @IncredibleCulk I voted for "Kier… https://t.co/jnVAa6NTlp— Stetson (@Stetson) 1543815411.0
I voted for @IncredibleCulk new middle name, what did you do today?— Catalina F 🇨🇱 (@Catalina F 🇨🇱) 1543801274.0
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight I like Keiran— Melissa (@Melissa) 1543517677.0
McAuley Culkin is allowing fans to vote on what is legal middle name should be, two of the final 5 is “Macauley Cul… https://t.co/KUPTU0HnKR— YOUAREDEAD (@YOUAREDEAD) 1543620499.0
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon @FallonTonight Just for you to know, I voted Macaulay Culkin!— 🍀 Maria (@🍀 Maria) 1543495868.0
This is all a publicity stunt to drive traffic to Culkin's website, Bunny Ears, launched earlier this year in March. The site bills itself as a lifestyle and holistic health brand, similar to Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop. However, the articles are jokes or satirical.
Good luck finding the site if you tried to go there right after the Fallon segment.
@IncredibleCulk @jimmyfallon Look at the bunny ears website now after @jimmyfallon voted on @IncredibleCulk middle… https://t.co/PFAwxsRB8E— Charles John Kelly (@Charles John Kelly) 1543485190.0
With articles like "A Tour Guide Of The Places Where Men Have Dumped Me" in their 'Travel Guides' section, or "Meditative Things White People Can Do While Black People Attempt To Explain White Privilege" under 'Spiritual Wellness,' it's difficult to imagine the site is wanting for traffic.
Time will tell what Culkin's new middle name will be, but as of this writing, it's looking like he'll be known as Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin. Which is a shame, because Macaulay Shark Week Culkin had such a nice ring to it.
H/T: Huffington Post, Bunny Ears
Time-Lapse Video Shows What A Rocket Launch Looks Like From Outer Space—And It's Dazzling 😮
We've all seen videos of rockets launching from the ground, but what does the event look like from space?
European Astronaut Alexander Gerst, on board the International Space Station, managed to capture time-lapse footage of the Russian Progress MS-10 cargo spacecraft flying through Earth's atmosphere on its way to delivering supplies to ISS.
Very few people will ever have the chance to see an event like this in person.
Russian Rocket Launch Seen by Space Station - Amazing Time-Lapse Videoyoutu.be
Gerst created the video by setting up a camera to take regular photos through the wrap-around Cupola window of the station, which resulted in a video roughly 16 times faster than real life. Watching the rocket launch in person took 16 minutes but, in Gerst's video, the launch, stage one re-entry, and escape from the atmosphere all occur within one minute.
@_TheSeaning @Space_Station That's awesome!— Scott Waby (@Scott Waby) 1542898886.0
The rocket in the video, known as Progress 71, was on its way to delivering 5,652 pounds of supplies to ISS. The next flight, pushed back to December 3 after a sensor malfunction resulted in the cancellation of an October 11 liftoff, will bring replacement personnel for NASA astronaut Serena Auñón-Chancellor and Russian cosmonaut Sergey Prokopyev. Both have been in orbit since June).
If all goes according to plan, the Canadian astronaut David Saint-Jacques will take off from the steppes of Kazakhs… https://t.co/o0LpNWTsJQ— CTV Vancouver (@CTV Vancouver) 1543800600.0
People online were amazed by the footage from space.
@_TheSeaning @Space_Station Seán, thank you for this. THIS is easily one of THE most mesmerising, and exquisitely s… https://t.co/a440XaOEX6— Nathanial_LB - نثنيال (@Nathanial_LB - نثنيال) 1542915054.0
@_TheSeaning @jasonrdavis @Space_Station SO COOOOL— Justin Foley (@Justin Foley) 1542908365.0
@_TheSeaning @Space_Station wow. just...wow. this is incredible— Sarafina Nance (@Sarafina Nance) 1542918245.0
I hardly think I need to hyperbolize this at all, because it’s simply so freaking cool: Time-lapse video of a rocke… https://t.co/lx32324AWv— Phil Plait (@Phil Plait) 1542989889.0
@BadAstronomer I watched this 5 times with my jaw on the floor... And then made everyone around the Thanksgiving ta… https://t.co/iMbSm8nvIO— Marc Leatham (@Marc Leatham) 1542990342.0
@BadAstronomer @LongDogSecurity https://t.co/Yv3YZQI9Oe— MO News DAilY (@MO News DAilY) 1543001454.0
@BadAstronomer I think that’s the most beautiful photo of Earth I’ve ever seen— Ben Migliore (@Ben Migliore) 1543092741.0
@freak1ngawesome Reverse of shooting star— Shivani Jadeja (@Shivani Jadeja) 1543667552.0
@AntonioParis What an inspiring way to begin my day! Thank you! 💫🚀✌🏻— Heather Call-Me-Elf-One-More-Time Hartley (@Heather Call-Me-Elf-One-More-Time Hartley) 1543492212.0
Videos like these are a nice reminder that space truly is the final frontier! If ISS is looking for a soundtrack to put behind their video, we have an idea:
Star Trek: The Next Generation Intro HDyoutu.be
This Brand's Tweet History Is A Hilariously Fitting Representation Of A Brand's Life Cycle 😂
Carl's Croutons tried their hand at social media to advance their brand.
But their objective got derailed when their tweet ignited a confusing thread that sent everyone down the rabbit hole.
@topherflorence captured highlights from the thread that received over three thousand retweets for its zaniness alone.
Can you follow?
the history of every brand on twitter somehow https://t.co/fWVXsElCvr— D🌑CFUTURE (@D🌑CFUTURE) 1540403954.0
The bread crumbs company endeavored to stir excitement for the brand by encouraging participation with the following tweet:
"Taking our first steps on the www!! tell us your favorite crouton recipes! #croutons #yum"
Harmless, right?
But somewhere along the way, the brand mixed business with politics. @religiousgames noticed that Carl's Croutons issued a one-word directive: vote.
The Twitter user asked, "What does it mean?"
@topherflorence What does it mean? https://t.co/IKifvva7ba— Vincent Gonzalez (@Vincent Gonzalez) 1540408943.0
Did the Carl's Croutons account manager get his social media account wires crossed? Possibly. But then we're not sure.
@topherflorence responded by saying, "lol that wasn't me i would posted something way dumber."
@religiousgames lol that wasn't me i woulda posted something way dumber— D🌑CFUTURE (@D🌑CFUTURE) 1540409220.0
The following tweet from Carl's Croutons attempted damage control:
"Carl's Crutons [sic] regrets the inappropriate tweet from earlier and we sincerely apologize to the people of The Republic of Malta."
So how did Carl's Croutons insult the Republic of Malta?
@topherflorence @oggborbis ...how did they insult Malta? I need to know.— astronaatti (@astronaatti) 1540405285.0
@Bestorb shed some light on why the Southern European island country may have been insulted by sharing a YouTube clip of episode 1008, "Final Justice," from Mystery Science Theater 3000.
Did it have something to do with the country's dominant population of women?
@astronaatti @topherflorence @oggborbis https://t.co/9imm31y8cM— Nick Bestor (@Nick Bestor) 1540429565.0
The thread spun off in all different directions.
@topherflorence @xoxogossipgita laughing hardest at crouton recipes— super normal internet (@super normal internet) 1540492558.0
@topherflorence That last one is life 🙌🏽— Rich F. Santiago (@Rich F. Santiago) 1540418084.0
@topherflorence WOW this was a ride.— Jackal's Husband, Yuko (@Jackal's Husband, Yuko) 1540405005.0
@ItsBobberto @topherflorence @austin_walker Late stage social media.— Mr. Jackpots (@Mr. Jackpots) 1540435914.0
There were many takeaways from the esoteric thread, but the one directive really stood out.
@topherflorence @MaxKriegerVG Haha, you got me. But seriously, vote.— Benoit Doidic (@Benoit Doidic) 1540414697.0
@topherflorence @zoebread Clever girl. https://t.co/i5VB74s8F9— brott rambler but spooky (@brott rambler but spooky) 1540478919.0
@topherflorence @NoraReed This was a wild ride.— Queer Eye for the Animorphs Reboot (@Queer Eye for the Animorphs Reboot) 1540412903.0
@topherflorence @seangentille I’m experiencing a new level of cringe right now— Helle Hansen 🌸 (@Helle Hansen 🌸) 1540423182.0
@topherflorence @ZaaackKoootzer This is the greatest thing I've seen all day— your very own monica bellucci dream (@your very own monica bellucci dream) 1540406700.0
@topherflorence @spacetwinks Optimistic engagement. Regret. 'How do you do, fellow kids.' Unity through shared outr… https://t.co/6VGrLNPZVp— Ink-stained @ MFF 2018 (@Ink-stained @ MFF 2018) 1540405582.0
@topherflorence @spacetwinks 2 is where they decided to hire a social media manager. 3 is when they decided to hire a different one.— Ink-stained @ MFF 2018 (@Ink-stained @ MFF 2018) 1540412100.0
@LaserBlade @topherflorence yeah i actually think they're pretty good croutons but then again they pay me to say that— cool dog mowing lawn (@cool dog mowing lawn) 1540436982.0
@topherflorence @mattfx This is magically funny like Goofy doing an unannounced set in a small black room— M💎R (@M💎R) 1540482697.0
@topherflorence @ZaaackKoootzer This is the greatest thing I've seen all day— your very own monica bellucci dream (@your very own monica bellucci dream) 1540406700.0
There's still an unanswered question.
@topherflorence I need to know the Malta story tho— NeoSorosbot (@NeoSorosbot) 1540423045.0
So who is Carl's Croutons anyway? Nobody knows. Just vote.