Ever meet people who make you wonder how they've managed to survive in this world so long believing what they actually believe?
It's enough to make you want to scratch your head in perpetuity, isn't it?
Thanks to Redditor Da_Fabulous_Duck, who asked the online community "What's the dumbest thing you had to explain to someone?" you get to cringe second hand!
"I had to explain..."
I had to explain to my sister how you don't get a longer ride if you sit at the back of the roller coaster.
"That her adopted..."
That her adopted grand baby from Korea wouldn't just grow up automatically knowing Korean or have a Korean accent.
"I worked..."
I worked with a guy who kept his kayak tied to the roof of his car all the time because he said it increased his fuel economy. I had to explain how it wasn't "creating more down force to reduce friction."
"Nobody thought..."
I once had to explain to a colleague that she did not have to print and file every single email she received. She claimed she was concerned about making sure we had written records in case the computers stopped working. She was almost 70 when I told this to her and she had been doing it her whole career since email was introduced. Literally every single email got printed. If there was an addition to an ongoing thread, she would print the whole damn thread again for every new email. I'm pretty sure this woman is responsible for at least one entire forest of tree loss.
Nobody thought it was weird that her department was spending the most on toner and paper. She was also head of the department, so maybe her subordinates were scared to say anything.
"I had to explain..."
I had to explain to my then 26 year old sister that my infant niece was not in fact allergic to corn because it showed up in her poop. She didn't believe me. Or our mother. My niece is 4 and has not had corn since she was a baby because my sister is still convinced that the corn not being fully broken down means she can't eat it. HOW woman, H O W?
"That the Amazon..."
That the Amazon is a rainforest not just a online shopping site. We were in geography.. studying the Amazon.
"I once met a woman..."
I once met a woman who thought Christopher Columbus and dinosaurs existed around the same time period. I didn't bother explaining because my brain fell right out.
"That no..."
That no, a memory card is not an acceptable substitute for film when you only have a FILM camera with you.
"I work..."
Giphy
I work in IT and a lady got married over the weekend (I didn't know or care). She called me that Monday and told me she could not log into her account.
I pulled up her info and said "Well, you aren't locked out. What username are you using?" She gave me her first initial and a new last name. I said that's not your account, where she proceeded to tell me how she got married etc.
She literally thought that when she got married all her accounts ever associated with her name changed. Automatically.
"Australians..."
Australians don't move Christmas to July just because it is cold. Christmas is not dependent on the weather and is celebrated on the same day around the world whether is is snowing or sunny.
All my ladies will tell you... "Just be respectful!" How hard is that? Don't be handsy, and be able to read the room. And most of all? NO. Is no! It's literally that easy. Everybody likes to flirt. Flirting is fun. Let's see how...
The Tub
Happy Ice Cream GIF by GIPHY Studios OriginalsGiphyHe brought me a huge tub of my favorite ice cream flavor after hearing that I was having a bad day.
Kombat
When I was 10 I received a love letter from a boy. It contained a flower inside, and at the bottom of the letter he wrote some cheat codes for Mortal Kombat for me. He knew I was always playing that game on my Sega.
13 Years In
I'm British, and I came over to the States on a temporary work visa, to do "one" ski season with Vail Resorts. I was bartending at an on mountain restaurant, and a couple of snowboarders come in and start talking to me. It came up that I was only there for the season, then one of them says "I'll marry you so you can stay... but we have to go on a date first".
... we just celebrated our 13 year anniversary, and I'm still in Colorado.
Rotted Fruit
fruit of the loom GIF by NBAGiphy"Hey do you want to help me throw fruit at my friends?" - 16 year old boy at summer camp, holding a bunch of oranges, who wanted to meet me. I was also 16 at the time.
Years Later...
The third time we hung out I went to his house. We were both in grad school and were talking in his room but I was exhausted from school and my 2 jobs. I was sitting on his bed and fell asleep. When I woke up he had put a blanket on me and was playing beautifully on the piano. I was so embarrassed cause I had drooled all over his pillow and surprised that he was so kind about the drool and not creepy about me being passed out on his bed.
We've been married for almost 4 years now and been together 8.
Bonus fun fact, his brother didn't believe I existed and accused him of making it up till I met him a year later. I was his first real girlfriend at like 25.
Oh I am feeling butterflies. I thought love was dead. So far, I've been given hope. Love can be born with trust. Tell me more...
Thanks to the Migraine
I was in Chicago on business, got a horrible migraine, and had to cancel a meeting with a man I had met with (for work) the day before. I get really bad migraines, really, really bad. After it was over I had to get a bit of food and something to drink, but it was very late and there was no way I would survive any kind of car/cab ride.
He was the only person I knew in town, so I sent him a text to see if he knew of anything in my area that would be safe/open that late within walking distance. He drove 30 min across town in the middle of the night to walk me to a 24hr restaurant and buy me dinner. I've been with him for 11 years now.
the corny...
Was riding home with the friends group back in 2008. We stopped to drop off the one guy, and I got out to stretch. I mentioned that the stars were so much more visible up there in the mountains and he said, "Yeah, they're really pretty. Wish I had someone to watch em with."
I'm a sucker for corny guys. We got married the next year and are celebrating 12 years this June.
Happy Halloween
Hocus Pocus Wtf GIF by FreeformGiphyWe met at a Halloween house party and when I was going to leave he walked me to the room with all the coats which also happened to be a kids room and he asked me "what color crayon would you like to write your phone number with?" I married him. Celebrated 20 years.
The First
My first boyfriend came into the store where I was working and just straight up told me he had seen me through the window and needed to run home to clean up/put on something nice so he could come back and ask me on a date. It was super endearing :)
Edit to add: he didn't WATCH me through the window lol, just saw me in passing and wanted to ask me out.
This was well before dating apps where you basically had to ask in person. He was within my age range, nice smile and just had a good energy.
Also his secondary flirting technique worked just as well, he brought me a book on our second date because I had mentioned in passing that I loved to read :) he was good at making me feel heard.
Silence
deaf sign language GIFGiphyNot me but my mum. My mum and dad were set up by a friend of theirs.
My mum is completely deaf, upon being told this before he met her my dad went out and learnt as much sign language as he could before he met her.... my mum doesn't know sign language... adorable and hilarious.
Women are so much better at this. And there is a lot to learn in this thread. I hope y'all gents took some notes. Willing gestures speak far more volumes than money, attitude or status. If you like then put a ring on it!
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.