We've all seen Hoarders. We know that people have the potential to have the weirdest homes.
But we don't have to go into those places. We maintain a safe distance from them. Unfortunately, not everyone is as lucky to do so as we are.
The people who have braved these weird homes have stories to tell. We must listen.
u/Tmoses_ asked:
Dear Maids/Cleaners of Reddit, whats the weirdest thing you've seen in someone else's home?
Here were some of their answers.
It's Like A Murder Scene
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Not sure if being a junk hauler counts as a "cleaner" but we had about 5 truck teams consisting of the driver and navigator cleaning this woman's house (she was a hoarder) and we found a dead rat underneath mounds of moldy clothes and boxes on an unused bed. He had a ring of walnuts around him and little tufts of what appeared to be a blanket ripped to shreds that he was laying on. The rat of course was dead but he went out like a king. It reminded me of the book and movie The Rats of Nimh.
Desperate Housewives But Like, Real
Work for a residential cleaning company for a few months. Me and one other person were cleaning a fairly wealthy family's home. Ring the door bell two young kids open the door look at us and run off. They knew us as we came to the house once a week. I take the upstairs other guy takes the main level. Hear the female homeowner yelling from her room to come look at something.
I walk into her bedroom find said home owner completely naked. It should be noted that she was mid 30's married and a very good looking fit woman. I immediately turn around and apologize profusely. Homeowner laughs and says it's ok I don't mind I needed you in here. Me confused talking through the door asks how I can help. She asked that I pick out clothes from her dresser and bring them to her (10 feet away I might add.)
(The only reason I didn't run away is that these people always tipped big and every encounter with them was always extremely odd.)
I gathered all her clothes bring them to her. She asks for my help getting dressed. I decline saying that I didn't feel that it was needed nor did I feel comfortable (I'm happily married) in the situation. She once again laughs and proceeds to stand up dress herself, hand me a $100 dollar bill, and go about the rest of the day like nothing happened.
I'm extremely confused, talked to my buddy about what had happened come to find out it had happened to him too. We started to ask other people that worked in the house before if they had experienced the same thing. After talking to a few people one guy said he banged her and when they were done the lady's husband came out of the closet. Turns out he's a major cuck and she just likes to bang. Also, we found out later they had always requested guys to clean and would not allow any of the female cleaners in the house.
Talcum What
I had a summer job as an apartment maintenance worker. My cousin was the head maintenance man so I kinda just got hired to help. Im not that handy. But the office workers called us in one day and asked to accompany them to an apartment unit because the man who lived there was 2 weeks past rent and they weren't able to get into contact with him.
Mind you, this is an upscale building. The apartment we went into was like 3k a month. But we walk in after knocking and immediately notice a white powdery tint over mostly everything in his unit. Like all of the table surfaces and counters, the tv, the furniture, etc.
We looked into one of the rooms and we see hundreds of empty baby power bottles basically filling the whole room. The worst was the bathroom. It was caked over everything. We were all pretty creeped out and ended up leaving. The leasing staff investigated online and turns out it looked like this guy had an extreme baby powder fetish of some sort.
They ended up evicting him and hiring a professional cleaning service to come clean the whole unit. By far the weirdest thing I've ever seen.
How Do People Live Like This
My dad and I have a junk hauling company and one job was the most disgusting jobs I've ever had. it was a chain smoker couple who got evicted. I was expecting is was going to be a small job so we got to this house and it stunk outside so bad I almost barfed multiple times. but when we went in it smelled like the inside of a landfill. But we had no choice so we went in and the fridge was dumped and it had a lot of meat and shattered jars all over the house. We found A lot of hypodermic needles, porn magazines and a sh*t load of cigarettes on the floor when me and my sister were working upstairs my dad went downstairs and these people grabbed a pipe wrench and broke all sewage lines flooding the basement.
Arrrgh, Me Booty
I was house/pet sitting and found a huge piratey looking treasure chest in the client's side yard. Massive wooden trunk, at least as big as a standard car boot, outside partially under a tarp and wrapped up in tape.
No idea what was in it, but I clearly watch way too many crime documentaries because to this day I still wonder if there was a dead body in there.
I'd Rather Die, Honestly
Not a cleaner, but my mom briefly worked for a company that cleaned college dorms for use during the year. Surprisingly, most of the dorms weren't out of this world disgusting, some trash and a couple stains to scrub out, whatever. But one dorm in particular she said had literal human sh*t everywhere; the walls, the doors, the ceiling, EVERYWHERE. Hearts and smiley faces of all shades of brown were smeared into the otherwise crisp white walls. The fecal matter murals drove her over the edge, as she has a strong stomach, but she never worked for a cleaning service again after seeing that dorm.
Daddy Paid For This...Dearly
There was no news story or I would certainly site here... from what I remember the home owner when I was there got the house from her dad. I'm 90% sure that her dad had been missing for years and the police suspected that it was his goop and "remains" in the bathroom. I don't know much more than that because after I gave my statement and the police let my boss know what was going on I left.
Gimme A Break, Gimme A Break
Someone tried to shred Kit Kat wrappers. I now have a habit of manually cleaning the shredder to check for weird stuff.
Likely a kid trying to hide evidence of their candy sneaking habits. I visited my sister a month or two after Halloween, and when we pulled out the sleeper sofa candy wrappers SHOWERED onto the floor. Immediately knew which my nieces it was lol
Popo With A Sock Fetish
Both my mother and sister sometimes clean houses for extra cash on the side.
My mom used to clean a younger (early 30s) cop's apartment. He was unfazed when she accidentally sent his iPad mini through the wash, but got really angry when he found out that she had done them same to his entire collection of crusty socks.
Your Stomach WILL Turn
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Go to my first solo job working for the company. Homeowner isn't supposed to be home and they gave me the code to the garage. Walk into the house immediately hear and feel wet carpet. It was urine. Could hear a dog barking upstairs and decided the dog must have had an accident. Walk past the piss to a tile section of the house and see what looks like a murder scene. The kitchen is covered in what can only be described as goop of yellow and orange color. I decide I needed to investigate the rest of the house before I started working.
Look in the first bathroom covered in literal sh*t and a scum that can only be described as play dough mixed with motor oil. If that's not odd enough I keep hearing what seems to me a person moving around upstairs. Walk into the master bathroom and immediately knew I needed to leave. The floor was yellow and brown, the tub was covered in red, yellow, brown and green goop/film.
Boss comes by goes in house (thinking I'm overreacting) comes back out with a horrific look (same one I probably had) and calls the homeowner. Turns out the homeowner was home the entire time. My boss said we would not clean it they needed to call a hazmat team. Turns out hazmat team wouldn't clean the house either. Cops get called, Someone was murdered (years before) and the goop in the bathroom was human remains.
To say the least I didn't work for the cleaning company again after that day.
Just like any dog!
My old roommate worked for a cleaning company. He regularly cleaned a house belonging to a well known local politician. This guy apparently had a spot in his shower where he regularly peed. Literally an established pee-corner that was gross and stained and had urine buildup. Erdnuss19
Freeze!
Found a gun one time. zenmia
Buffalo Bill? Is that you?
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A little hollow turtle filled with cut fingernails. UrthenAether
Nope. I came here to read about finding weird sex toys. Did not come here for this. I will still upvote but consider this a warning. ScottsTots2013
Too much #2....
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Diarrhea on the ceiling/walls/floor, turds under the bed and in the closet. BrigandsYouCanHandle
RIP Bugs....
A dead rabbit. It was their pet. It's was their daughters and she started crying so much that I had to clean the house again. Ohgod420
Child's Play
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Not a maid anymore, but I used to long ago. Strangest thing was a bathroom that had 3 foot tall clown dolls lining the upper part of the wall all the way around. sarajane82
I had my grandmother do this for me with porcelain dolls in my room. I loved it as a child but looking back it was creepy as hell. Woshambo
How Special?
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A cookie jar filled with eraser shavings. Febuarie
Maybe they were saving it for something special..? Tmoses
Got a Permit?
A taser. silliputti0907
At least it wasn't a coconut... Thalida87
This thread... I am not disappointed. No sex toys but really crazy storyies, way better than expected. Thalida87
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When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
homer simpson episode 23 GIF
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.