Have you ever Marie Kondo'd yourself a little bit too hard?
It's kind of something I'm notorious for. Most of my family has a bit of a hoarding habit, so I guess you could say my version of rebellion is the fact that I keep virtually nothing. I don't typically attach sentimental value to things, so throwing them away or donating them comes easily.
If it doesn't spark joy in that moment, it's out.
That doesn't mean there haven't been a few times I've totally regretted my extreme-Kondo habits. I'm looking at you, original Fashion Star Fillies from the 80's. Never has a plastic pony been more full of elegaaaanza.
Reddit user abstimax wanted to know what sorts of things people had gotten rid of but wish they had kept. Not gonna lie, most people's reasonings for wishing they had kept things went well beyond objective fabulousness.
That doesn't mean the things they regret getting rid of were any less interesting, though. Check out some of these responses.
Dear Diary, NOPE!
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My old diaries. Was too scared my parents would go through my room and discover it when I was away at camp. So much regret, because it would have been so interesting to look back and read about how younger me thought and viewed life, and the things that I deemed important to me back then.
I kept my old diaries, but moved around a lot on my 20s and left them at my parents house. When the time came to clean out my stuff (I was in my mid-30s), I went through them again, thinking it would be pretty cool to revisit 14 year old me. I cringed so hard I ended up throwing them out.
10+ Years Of Art
My old harddrive that I accidentally wiped the entire partition that had like 10+ years of my artwork saved on it.
Wardrobe Whoopsies
Lost a bunch of weight (30lbs). Threw out all my fat clothes because "I'll never let myself get like that again!"
Life happened, lots of stress happened, gained the weight back. Had to buy all new fat clothes.
3 years later, lost all the weight again. Did I learn from my mistake last time and keep my fat clothes? NOPE. Threw them out as incentive because THIS time, THIS time, I would DEFINITELY not gain it back. I was scared that if I kept the fat clothes, I would somehow be less motivated to keep the weight off.
Moved away, had to change jobs from very active to sedentary job, stupidly didn't adjust my diet to compensate. Gained most of the weight back.
Going to lose the weight again but this time I will keep my damn clothes.
- elf-y
Never Forgiven Myself
I was given a $45,000 trust fund when I turned 18 (my mother passed away when I was 4 and her assets were sold, with funds being divided between my siblings and I in a locked GIC until we were 18). I spent it in 1 yr on booze and gifts for boyfriends........have never forgiven myself.
The Book
The first girl I ever fell in love with wrote me a book. An entire book. It was about her early childhood and all this stuff she went through. We broke up because I left high school before she did, and we grew apart. We eventually became friends again, and she asked me for it back years later when she was going through therapy and wanted to see what she'd written when she was younger.
I threw the book away in a dumpster, along with my high school yearbooks and some other stuff that reminded me of her. I lied and said I lost it because I didn't want her to think she ever meant so little to me.
I still feel guilty that I let my emotions get the better of me. I saw a Gilmore Girls episode once where the mom has a box for stuff her daughter wants to throw away, but she makes her wait a year before really doing it. I should've had that box.
When Mom Cleaned
When I was in the 5th grade, my mom started to raise a huge stink about the state of my bedroom. As a kid, through a combination of generous aunts and uncles, good grades, and plain ol' begging, I'd amassed a collection of stuff: SNES and Genesis games (yes, my SNES and Genesis ran fine), Batman: The Animated Series, X-Men, and Spider-Man: The Animater series action figures, LEGO sets, Micro Machines, Mighty Max playsets, GI Joes, gaming magazines, and posters. She wanted me to get rid of all that stuff because I was in the 5th grade now and should be more "grown up". I actively resisted.
And then I made the mistake of going out of town. I went on an out of town camping trip with some cousins for a weekend. I cam back, and my room was basically empty. Just clothes and books and bare walls and empty shelves. Mom said she "had my room cleaned", and to this day (I'm 31 now), I still harbor a deep resentment over that.
Charger Needed
I have an old Motorola mobile phone that I must have thrown out the charger etc. for ages ago. It has a video of my younger brother throwing the funniest temper tantrum while trying to put his already-tied shoes on & refusing to stop & untie the laces first. I swear one day I will embarrass the hell out of him with the video & for that reason, I still have the phone at home just in case one day I manage to boot it up again...one day.
- itsBoof
I Already Owned That
When I got divorced my main concern was getting out as quickly as I could for safety reasons. So when I first moved out I loaded everything I couldn't live without into my car; like my pets, my clothes, important documents, favorite books, and irreplaceable mementos. Everything else didn't really matter to me at that point.
After discussing it with my ex he gave me 1 day to come in and pick up some of my stuff. And he fought me on everything. DVD's, furniture, kitchenware, you name it. I left with less than half of what I owned. I know in the long run it doesn't matter because I made it out with my pets and were all safe now, but its so frustrating to repurchase things that I already own.
Forgetting Mom
My parents divorced when I was eleven and I stayed with my mother and my sister. Afterwards my mother became psychologically abusive and my sister emulated her while also becoming anorexic which made the following seven years everything but what you'd like a childhood to be like. At 18 I decided that I had enough and with the help of my father moved out and to college when they weren't at home.
I only left a letter explaining why I left and blocked them in any way possible. A year later I get a package with a lot of pictures from my childhood from my mother. At the time, I really just wanted to forget about her so I threw out all the pictures that had her in them and gave the rest to my father to keep.
As much as she is a despicable person, I really would like to have kept them. I left in a hurry back then so I didn't take any other childhood pictures with me and regret having destroyed something so unique and personal despite the bad memories. It hurts.
Private Poetry
Half my life ago I was 14 and I got hit by a car. I ended up in a coma and with frontal lobe brain damage. When I finally got home from hospital months later I expressed my feelings and how I was dealing with everything through poetry. But I was very very private about it. So when my mum found them and told me she'd read them and they were great I immediately threw them away. It felt like a violation.
I wish I'd kept them, not even for my sake but they might've helped someone else going through the same thing.
Pictures Of The Ex
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Honestly, pictures of me and my ex after we split.
We met in college 9 years ago and dated for about 1.5 years. We took tons of pictures during that time but we had a messy breakup. 21-year old me decided to delete those pictures without thinking of the consequences.
5 years later, we decided to give it another chance and now I'm married to her.
The Secret Mentor's Journal
I have the worst story ever.
15+ years ago I met a married guy at a conference. Fell head over heels for him in like 5 minutes, but.... married. At the end of the week it turned out he had been randomly assigned me, as his secret mentee. So all week he had been secretly researching and working on the issues I was at the conference to study/improve myself on. He took it really seriously and even got up at like 5am every day to have a couple of hours to research ways to help me. He even kept a journal of tips, thoughts on our conversations, and tons of words of encouragement that I could use in the future. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me. When he gave it to me I almost started bawling. But.... married.
When I got home I absolutely could not walk past where that journal was without thinking of him and going to a really dark place. I was single and I realized I was comparing every guy I met to this person I could never be with, who I had known for a total 5 days. Dumb!! So I threw the journal away. Over the years, every so often some of his words of education/encouragement would come back to me, and I would immediately push them out of my mind.
A couple of years ago we ran into each other by chance. He had just gotten divorced but was definitely still going through a lot and was in no way ready to date. But we got to be really good friends. He even took me and my mom to lunch one day when my mom had just gotten out of the hospital and needed help getting around.
At lunch my mom blabbed "I remember her talking about you after that conference! You're the one who made her that journal!" Dude laughed and pulled out of his breast pocket a friggin handwritten copy of the journal he had made for himself. 15+ years later. They were little notepad-style books, and he said he had kept mine in his inside breast pocket at the conference, so that he could jot down thoughts throughout the day.- Sashanasha
He said "carrying me next to his heart" for those days and getting up early in the morning to write it had made him feel really close to me. He said that since our friendship had resumed and I'd been facing a lot of challenges with my mom's health, he had been *adding to the journal* and said "bring me yours, I'll copy some stuff over."
I started stammering horribly and practically cried when I said "oh I think when I moved it got lost..." and readers: HIS FACE. It was like I murdered his puppy in front of him!
But I didn't know how to say "I couldn't look at it without wishing you would get a divorce and I didn't want to be that kind of person. and I needed to move on to other men without having you as all five faces on my personal Mount Rushmore." I didn't know how to tell him "I threw my heart away that day" or "when we reconnected, I realized that the reason I'm still single is because I never stopped comparing other men to you."
So he assumed I just didn't feel anything but friendship for him, and got all shy and embarrassed. I'm still trying to convince him but so far it hasn't worked. I still don't know if I should tell him or not -- what a weird thing to say to somebody! But man, what I wouldn't give to have that journal back.
The Last Doorbell Video
When my 17 year old son died in 2017, I had video from the ring doorbell the morning he went to school. In it was "Love you, too!" from him when he left for school.
It got deleted after a period of time. Not by me. Damn. I wish I had thought to save it someplace.
But at least I know his last words to me in person were about love. At least I know he died knowing his Mama loved him. He came into this world with those same words and he left with those same words- and that knowledge is comforting.
GabeGecko wanted to thrash through some major misinformation they asked fellow Redditors:
“What is the most largely believed piece of misinformation?"
Teaching incorrect color theory in schools…
animation color GIF by Motion AddictsGiphy“That red yellow and blue are the primary colors for painting. It's actually magenta, yellow, and cyan - those are the real primary colors. Also, the only thing special about primary colors is that they map to the inverse of the colors our eyes see (our eyes actually see red green and blue unless you have another type of color vision).” ebray99
The biggest contributors to the climate crisis isn't you, it's industrial waste and meat production….
“Recycling. Corporations are wasting millions of tons of resources, and severely damaging the environment. Kurzgesact has a really good video on this. But to summarize: corporations have successfully shoved the climate change problem onto consumers.”
“So to elaborate: This problem isn't quite that black-and-white. The amount of waste varies a lot between countries, as well as the providences/states within countries.” Dot957
Zeus just really sucks at apologies.
“Hercules is his Greek name. It actually isn't and I think more and more people are finding out about this now but its actually Heracles/Herakles. He was named as a 'tribute' for Hera because she was upset that Zeus cheated (again).” Akane_Hyuga_2359
Much to the heartache of the horror genre…
“Inverted crosses are satanic. It is actually the St. Peter's Cross. When he was crucified, he requested to be crucified upside down because he didn't feel worth to be crucified the same way as Jesus.” EngineerMinded
You are entitled to your wrong opinion however…
“That all opinions are valid. Everyone may have opinions. Everyone may speak their mind. Everyone should pursue truths and understanding.”
“However, when debating a topic, there's a big difference between somebody who has spent their entire professional career and education on the debate's subject matter versus someone who saw a post on Facebook.” sMc-cMs
Lack of humidity means less insulation so temperatures easily rise and drop dramatically.
“Deserts are hot. Many are, but not necessarily so. The requirement is that they get less than ten inches of precipitation a year. Antarctica is a desert too.” 8dogsinatrechcoat
"She was an elderly woman who suffered from third degree burns…”
“The other day someone corrected me about the McDonalds coffee incident. I firmly believed the lady did it on purpose, but it was clear that it was accidental and McDonalds had spun a story with the media to make it look like it wasnt their fault. Kind of insane how me and most people around me were fooled by that.” Dead-HC-Taco
“She was an elderly woman who suffered from third degree burns on her thighs and vagina and had to be hospitalized. The McDonald's had been warned that their coffee was kept too hot as well, just under boiling. She initially sued them just for medical expenses because when she asked politely they refused.”
“The judge was so incensed by their behavior that he awarded her the big settlement which was so widely mocked. And anti-government regulation/pro-business groups spun it into this testimony to frivolous lawsuits. Really a shocking piece of misinformation.” ofBlufftonTown
Please call emergency services immediately and follow their guidance, not googles…
“EMT here! Boy are there a lot, but the one that comes to mind is that of someone is having a seizure you need to put something in their mouth so they don't swallow their tongue. This is false for a few reasons:
1) It is physically impossible to swallow your tongue. Go ahead and try, it's attached on pretty well.
2) Putting something in a seizure patients mouth will only introduce a choking hazard. Now the patient has two problems.
3) Seizure patients bite and they bite HARD! So if your fingers are in the patient's mouth when that bite happens, your patient will again have two problems and medical staff will have two patients.” puizunman206
The other 90% is just random facts and Tim Gunn quotes…
Mrw GIFGiphy“The whole "we only use 10% of our brains" thing. Nonsense.” JToTheGlock
Although best practice is to leave nature alone your mama was wrong on this one.
“If you touch a baby bird, their mothers will reject them.” SinisterBootySister
Many of these were considered just plain facts back in our day. Brings us back to some of the best advice one can give: “Question everything, then question the answer."
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They say friendships form for a reason, a season, or a time. If we're lucky, that time gets to be a really long one - but more often than not things are going to go sideways.
Sometimes friendships fizzle out, people drift apart, maybe someone moves or gets a new job... but every now and then there's one defining moment where you look at someone and think "yeah... I'm gonna have to friend-dump you."
Reddit user FeelThePower999 asked:
"What was the moment you looked at your friend and realized they were no longer a friend and you were going to cut ties?"
Sooooo yeah... boundaries. Let's watch people plow right on through them, shall we?
We're Too Old For Shunning
rachel mcadams blow kiss GIFGiphy"She threw a big 30th birthday party for all her friends. She purposefully invited one girl she'd had a falling out with to come two hours later than the party started."
"Before the girl showed up, she told everyone that the girl was a b*tch and we should all shun her. The poor girl came in with a big expensive present, so happy that her & her where mending things, just to be ignored and belittled by over 30 people."
"The girl left crying. I left not long after and ghosted the sh*t out of my ex-friend."
"She was a minor celebrity in my country. I already saw people take a lot of bad behaviour from her before this happened, but this just pushed me over the edge. People get weird around celebrities, no matter how minor." - fluffyfluffycake
Rooting Against Me
The Princess Bride Boo GIF by filmeditorGiphy"I was waiting for news of a big career opportunity for a few months, and the sound of relief and satisfaction in her voice when I told my friend it fell through made me realize how hard she had been internally rooting against me."
"Feeling jealous of a friend who has a good thing happen is just part of what it means to be human. But, in that moment, the fact that her response didn't seem mixed with any sympathy for my sadness made me look differently at the dynamics of that friendship."
"I think she genuinely liked me, but not being the "star" in our friendship was too much for her."
Different With An Audience
Awkward Dj Pauly D GIF by Jersey Shore Family VacationGiphy"When they started treating me different around other people."
"Together just the two of us, everything was great. In a crowd I became ignored except for when I was the butt of jokes. I'm not thin skinned, I'm not talking about not being able to take a joke."
"It's more that they act embarrassed to know me or want to distance themselves."
"You feel played, betrayed, let down and over all like a fool. I've come to realize it's 100% the other persons insecurity, though. Hurt people hurt people - and I don't have time for that insecure bull." - slugvegas
How Little Interest
Go Away Reaction GIFGiphy"I tried to talk to a guy who I thought was my friend about something going on between me and my Dad for a few minutes during a drive."
"He flat out silently stared at his phone - until I said something semi related about him. That is when he perked up and started telling me about how much money he'd made recently, and how he got all of this free weed from someone and boy was his life sweet."
"I sorta just 'mhm'ed' my way through it because it was obvious he had been ignoring me, and when he got to the end of his brag session he in all serious told me he was pretty offended at how little interest I showed in what he'd been saying." - CommercializedPan
Losing My Religion
music video 90s GIFGiphy"When I told them that I left my high demand religion. They said we no longer had anything in common."
"What?? 30 years of friendship over in 1 conversation?! Plus, I had been out of the religion for years, but they never knew. Our friendship was fine."
"Once official, I was 'no longer trustworthy, sinful and lost.' That was the end for me."
"It's their loss, not mine." - Gotagoodkidney
"This happened to me. My husband and I left Mormonism and our best friends (so close we were like family) ghosted us over it."
"When my husband confronted his friend about it, the guy said a bunch of vicious stuff about us and claimed they'd never really liked us. It broke my f*cking heart."
"That was more than three years ago and I still have dreams where I'm trying to reconcile with them." - Confident_Basket8694
His Alibi
Season 1 Nbc GIF by The Good PlaceGiphy"We kind of fell out a while ago and haven't spoken much, but today I learned that he seems to have been using me as an alibi to cheat on his wife."
"She texted me about us having drinks the other night & we haven't done anything socially outside of work since before COVID. Without going into detail I'm certain my confused reaction blew up whatever bull he's been telling her."
"I am not in the habit of lying to people & wouldn't cover for someone in this situation unless it involved a psycho abusive spouse, a "we went on one date" stalker - that kind of thing... Even then I'd need some kind of heads up beforehand!"
"So I don't know what he's been trying to pull, but any hope of rekindling any friendship is now 100% gone. I'm not his alibi." - 3dogsinatrenchcoat
The "Backup Wife"
Dean Winchester Facepalm GIFGiphy"I had a close friend from childhood who was very into the traditional lifestyle, with wife, kids, house with a picket fence, part of the PTA and church. Even in high school."
"He would date anyone that would have him, and ignore us until they broke up and he'd come crawling back. We were best of friends so we always were glad to have him back involved in our group. He went to college literally because he was looking for a girl to marry."
"He ended up dropping out after 2 yrs, and getting a job delivering auto parts where he started dating and married his boss's daughter. They popped out 3 kids right in a row, and every time I talked to him things were "great" but he just would stop responding to me more and more often."
"He was 110% devoted to his little family which was great, but he just stopped being my friend. I'd invite him to get together and he would always just say 'oh why don't you come over here, you can see the kids.' "
"That was fine, but his wife and he would just be on me the whole time about how I'm not really an adult because I dont have a family, my job was putting my ability to have kids at risk (firefighter) and that I basically only had value if I was breeding."
"So part of the distancing was me honestly. I didn't like having to put up with that just to see my friend."
"Long story short, his wife cheats on him, they divorced and she's instantly pregnant with another guy's baby. He comes to me broken over this and we get close again. Really close."
"I drove him to therapy, watched his kids while he was laying in bed all day, unable to get up and brought food for his family."
"I opened up about why I felt we drifted apart in the first place. He actually apologized and admitted he suspected that was why. I thought I had my best friend again."
"Until he met another girl and I started seeing less of him."
"He started flaking on me to hang out. When I did come over, the remarks about 'doing the adult thing' would come out again. His new girlfriend had 3 kids too, so he started joking about being the Brady Bunch."
"I hung on trying to keep the friendship together because I felt bad for not trying enough last time, but he was sliding back into the old him. I was sitting looking at a text he sent after ignoring me for a week that said 'lol, yes, well maybe you'll find a good woman like I did and finally grow up' "
"I suddenly realized I was the only one trying to be a friend, and I just didn't give a sh*T anymore. I deleted his number and haven't heard from him in 2 years. Last thing I heard from him was that text."
"I realized he didn't want to be my friend so much as I was his 'backup wife.' I was easy to fall back on when he found himself single, that's it."
"I'm thinking he may reach out again when he finds himself single again. I won't be there to answer." - The_Great_Blumpkin
Childhood Beauty
Toddlers And Tiaras Beauty GIFGiphy"Friend invited me to see her 4 yo daughter perform in a beauty pageant. Ugh, I know, but whatever I wanted to support the kid."
"The little girl sang a sob song about some kid praying to Jesus about their dead mommy. My friend whispered to me that the song 'always won brownie points with the judges'. Again, ugh."
"After the girl performed she came to stand by us in the audience and my friend SMACKED the child's tummy and scolded 'suck it in, no one likes a fat kid.' "
"Yep, I was DONE. I walked out." - noseymimi
Sounded Like An Incel
Cuff Him Season 2 GIF by American GodsGiphy"He started saying some pretty gross stuff about this girl who was his friend. She wasn't interested in anything more than friendship and he was pissed about it."
"I told him he sounded like an incel. That's when I started pulling away."
"The last time I saw him was after he got out of prison on bail and wanted to discuss why he was in there and why it was pretty definite he was going back after his trial." - ultravioletblueberry
Google Calendar
Interested Kim Kardashian GIFGiphy"A former friend was going through a divorce that she had instigated by cheating on her ex. She was very, very upset that most people in her circle had sided with her ex."
"I did not pick a side, in part because I was very aware of the sad state of their relationship when she decided to end it. However, she began demanding that I pick a side."
"That led to a slow cooling in our friendship, which blew up one day when I met up with the ex for a beer. Right before we met up, the former friend started frantically texting, wanting to meet up."
"Turned out she had access to my Google Calendar and was following my motions through there."
"She was pissed that I met up with her ex (who was also a friend) and tried to sabotage it. After that I decided I was done with her."
"Too weird, too creepy and controlling. Still friends with the ex, though." - bonbonnibles
Now that we've read Reddits stories, it's your turn. Tell us about the times you knew a friendship had run it's course. I can't wait to read these comments...