The Weirdest Things Patients Have Ever Said When Waking Up From Anesthesia
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"Count down from 100."
Those instructions will sound familiar if you've ever been put under for surgery or a dental procedure. You also know that you're not quite yourself when you wake up.
Reddit users were asked various times to share their best stories of people being under the influence of anesthesia and almost 6,000 people responded.
Speaking in Tongues
When I was being put under for oral surgery, the nurses said I started babbling in a strange language, and recorded part of it for proof. It turns out I was speaking Welsh (my grandparents were from Wales). Odd thing was, under anesthesia I sounded pretty fluent and conscious I only know random words and phrases. ProfessorLake
Rewards For Bravery
My dentist kept a big basket of little toys and prizes to reward the youngest patients, you know, mini yo-yos and stickers and stuff. When I got my wisdom teeth out, I remember stumbling over to it and deciding I really wanted a treat, but I was too clumsy from the drugs to pick anything up. So I thought, "F* it, I was so brave, I deserve all of it," and I swept it all into my sweatshirt pocket.
Woke up to my sister and her boyfriend laughing at me, sleeping next to my pile of treasures. Temporary tattoos, stick-on earrings, little whistles and pinwheels, pencils, bouncy balls, I got them all. I couldn't laugh, so I just made a sound like, "Hoo hoo hoo" and went back to sleep.
I feel a little bad about it now. what_n0w
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Can I Get A Frosty With That?
When I went in to have my appendix removed after it rudely burst the doctors were trying to keep me in good spirits. So they asked me before I went under for surgery after not feeling well or eating for about 48 hours:
Dr: "What is the first thing you want to eat?"
Dr: "What are you going to get at Wendy's"
Then I went under for surgery and woke up like 2 hours later and it felt like (I ate) a cactus so I obviously asked "wtf?" the nurse that was with me simply told me that I had woken up in the middle of surgery. I guess I slipped my arm out of the wrist holder restraint and reached over and ripped my breathing tube out and advised "I'm fu_king starving" and they apparently freaked out and told me they weren't done to which I replied "Oh I'm sorry, continue" and passed back out. I remember nothing, but my throat does, as well as the orderly that was laughing about it with me in the AM. parkesto
I put people out like once or twice a day.... Funniest one I can remember is this dude in with a dislocated shoulder, kinda a meek guy and his wife was in the room - usually we make family leave, but not always. Anyway, start talking to him while we push the drugs and at first he's totally with it, "Oh well, my wife and I are going to Hawaii (words getting more slurred) thiss weeek and (eyes droopy) Imunna f___ the SH*T outtaver... (almost out)...". His wife was SO RED. We all tried not to smile and she excused herself. elaxandletithappen
Good Name Though
When I went under to have my appendix removed, I apparently kept telling everyone I could about my cat, Russell.
I don't have a cat. Demaikeru
My oral surgeon told me a knock knock joke while I was being put under for my wisdom teeth removal.
Afterwards, he told me that I laughed so hard at the joke that I threw up and pissed my pants. He said no one had ever laughed that much at one of his jokes before.
I don't remember any of it, but my pants were definitely moist while I was in the recovery room. It was pretty embarrassing for 23 year old me. [deleted]
Yes Sir, General Anesthetic
As I was being wheeled into the OR for brain surgery the drugs were heavily kicking in. My wife, referring to the two dozen or so people preparing for the operation said, "Man, there's an army of people here to take care of you."
I replied, "How the hell are we going to feed them?" RDRHostage
Chris Ryan / Getty Images
Call Me Sal
I (a guy) had a simple surgery about a year ago to remove some bone fragments I had floating around in my ankle when I broke it. Apparently right after they got me back from my anesthetic they were asking me the date, where I was, and my name to make sure there were no complications. I apparently looked the male nurse dead in the eyes and told him "You can call me Sally if it makes you feel better, but it isn't going to help you get lucky tonight." Thunderthorz
My 15 year old son had a fever, stomach ache, and pain in his side. We went to the Doctor, who sent us straight to the hospital fearing Appendicitis. ER doc told us the same thing. They start an IV and sedate him then run tests to confirm diagnosis. Turns out he had a stomach flu, and the pain in his side was gas. Or as we call it now, the $4000 fart. Anyway, as we are leaving the hospital my son is freaking out. He is yelling at me "You are a huge idiot, and getting ripped off. You didn't even ask the doctors to shrink my head back to normal size. How am I going to fit this giant head in the car. There is no way I am going to school like this. What if my head just floats off my body. Do you even love me? Why didn't you ask them how to shrink my head?" I was laughing so hard and trying to console my son who was really concerned about his giant head floating off of his shoulders. A positive side effect of his outburst was he got so riled up yelling, he let out a huge fart then let us know he felt better, and only occasionally asked us about his giant head for the next hour. fictionalname
I had a colonoscopy done last year. I also have a tattoo of Bender from Futurama on my a**. Apparently I was very aggressive in trying to show the nurses and doctors my tattoo. That was a weird day. pjkenk2
Laughter is the Best Medicine
This happened as I was just waking up from surgery for something done below the waist. As I saw the nurses looking under my gown. They were laughing about something, and I said, "Usually when a woman looks down there she doesn't laugh."
Which caused them to laugh even harder. [[deleted]1]
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I've Seen This Episode
One time I was under and my doctor spoke to me briefly while standing outside my curtained room, with only his head peeping past the curtain. When he saw that I was awake and talking, he elaborately opened the curtain up to reveal a group of 10-15 people standing, watching me in my hospital bed. Apparently I kept saying that I was on an episode of Scrubs, and I wouldn't stop calling the doc JD. Idunno-doyouknow
Don't Make Me Turn This Gurney Around
I was sitting in the recovery room after my girlfriend had her appendix out, and they wheeled in an older woman. The nurses were talking about nurse stuff, like what cubicle to put her in, and the older woman goes "HEY! Quiet down back there, or I'm turning this car around right now!" in a dopey anesthesia voice. On cue, both nurses go "Sorry, Mom!" The lady smiles. [deleted]
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I had a breast reduction several years ago and when I came out of anesthesia I immediately punched my nurse in the face and started screaming and trying to get up and get away. It really didn't go well. I don't really remember them getting me out of the surgery center, but I remember on the way home I was screaming and cursing and just generally freaking out in an insane way, all while my mother attempted to keep me from hurting myself. I guess I thought I was in a captive situation and everyone was trying to kill me, or take my organs for the black market. I have no idea.
When we got home she instantly handed me 2 of my prescribed Percocet and left me to drool and watch TV. I went back a week later and apologized to the nurse, gave her a gift certificate to a day spa, and gave the staff a bunch of baked goods. I felt awful about it. I work in the medical field, and I was the nightmare patient. CosmicDustbunny
At 18 I had my wisdom teeth removed. I distinctly remember the doctor asking what I saw out of the window as I was going under. I realized later I described in great detail a topless woman in the window of the building across the street.
...the doctors office overlooked a field. SpiritOf76ers
I was put under general anesthetic for surgery a few years ago. The doctor told me afterward that I vividly described what I called "the greatest seven minutes of porn ever created". He said the nurse had to leave the room because she was so embarrassed. I have no idea what I was even talking about and remember none of it. StickleyMan
I was coming out from general anesthetic after my colonoscopy (a few months after I turned 21), I described in glorious detail the events of my 21st birthday to my parents and our church pastor (who'd come to visit), including my younger friend hooking up with my boss, how the car had actually gotten damaged, and how the security deposit for the apartment was withheld for "excessive carpet staining."
The first thing I remember was my mother's disapproving stare ?_? and my dad saying. "I don't think you should ever drink that much again."
The next time I had a colonoscopy was a few years later, shortly after I returned from Europe. I asked the nurse to make sure I was conscious of what I was saying before they let my parents in that time since the stories I was likely to tell were much more embarrassing.
To clarify, I was raised in the bible belt, and this was the first time I had discussed anything alcohol consumption related with my parents. That church pastor stopped inviting me to events at her house and hasn't looked at me the same way since. thewalex
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Prim and Proper
As a student, I spent a day observing (and trying to be helpful) in the recovery ward for a GI clinic (think Colonoscopy). I was bringing a gentleman's wife in to see him and went over to see if he was fully awake. Now, this was a very proper gentleman, who came in in a 3 piece suit, and seemed super-embarrassed about the whole process.
So, he looks up at me, farts, then says "nurse, I think I have just been violated" before falling back asleep. His wife just sorta stood there. I booked it out of the room, spent 5 minutes laughing hysterically in the cleaning room, surrounded by all manner of equipment designed to go into people. KirinG
I had wisdom teeth removed. I remember my doctor mentioning that after I went under I started talking about lizards with hats. That doesn't trump what followed the surgery though.
Upon being roused from my seat my father jokingly offered to let me drive home. He and the doctor had to chase me and take the keys from my hands. Next thing I remember is waking up on the couch making car noises. acktac
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Freddie Is a God
My mom was my driver while I had my wisdom teeth pulled and was in the room when I was being 'brought back' from the anesthesia. I don't remember any of it but my mother told me that the nurse told me that I had to keep my mouth still to stop the bleeding. I then preceded to start singing "Under Pressure" by Queen and when she told me to stop talking, I looked at her with a face full of disgust and said "Freddie Mercury is a god and it's bullsh*t you don't like him." This all happening while my mouth was stuffed with gauze. bigsausagepizzasven
When I had my wisdom teeth taken out last summer, I tried to get into a fist fight with my doctor because he kept hitting my gag reflex and I was mad about it. When I came to, he was pretty pissed, then while I was being lead to the recovery room, the anesthetic made me feel tall, and I started laughing and said "what is this, an oral surgeon's office for ANTS?!" I sh*t you not...my memory's spotty, but I very vividly remember yelling that in the office. Then when I got to the recovery room, I asked for nachos, the nurse said no, and I cried for 3 hours afterwards.
Pretty sure the doctors and nurses never saw someone switch moods that fast. TeHNyboR
I am deathly afraid of needles so I got laughing gas before getting put out when getting my wisdom teeth removed. My Indian dentist was testing how out of it I was to see if it was okay to put the needle in me and asked, "How high are you?" really meaning, "How tall are you?". I'm a stoner so my natural response was "I'M HIGH AS F___ DUDE!". Gave him a little laugh that day. prebreeze
Had two operations about ten years apart in the same hospital. Got wheeled in to the pre-op room for the second operation and looked at a picture on the wall of an underwater scene. Recognized it from when I was 14 and had a flash back of talking endlessly under the pre-op anesthetic to the nurses the last time about "the pretty dolphins". Attempted to relate this hilarious story at 25 to the nurses present and found myself raving about the pretty dolphins all over again. Thomboy
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I had to go under for a lithotripsy for a kidney stone (they shoot sound waves into your kidney to break up the stone.) They had been giving me morphine all day so I was feeling pretty good. When they brought me into the room for the procedure they brought over the gas mask and asked if I was ready, I looked at the nurse and said, "F' YEAH! BLAST THAT F'ER OUT OF THERE WITH SLAYER!!" tommyservo
When I was younger, I dislocated both my shoulders. When I went to the hospital, they put me under and when I awoke I was still feeling the effects.
My dad later told me that when I woke up, I started to strip off all my clothes and called my doctor a dirty (girl) multiple times. I guess I don't react well to anesthetic? sockshot
Mitsuko Nagone / Getty Images
Feeling the Love
I'm a nurse who administers "twilight sedation" for endoscopy procedures. My patients come in thirsty, starving, and usually scared sh*tless.
In general, I'd say the whole sedation process makes them less rather than more weird. It's very rewarding when a highly anxious patient awakens to find it's all over, they don't remember a thing, and the news is (hopefully!) good.
That said, there are entertaining moments! Sometimes, relief and a Versed buzz translate into deep affection. One guy woke up to learn he didn't need invasive surgery, told me he loved me, went back to sleep, and repeated that process every five minutes for an hour, even after I brought his wife back. tadababa
I had to get stitches. Something went wrong and the gash got ripped open a little more. I was told that they had to put me under. While going under I apparently grabbed an older lady nurses' (talking mid 50's) chest, and told her I like my milk spoiled. [deleted]
Don't Eat the Baby
When I was born, there were some severe complications and my mum was given gas & air. She was convinced that she was giving birth to a tin of spaghetti, and kept saying how she was looking forward to eating me. duffgirl
40 year old man, waking up: "No Mum! I don't want to go to school today, the kids are mean." whistledick
What Not to Watch
Apparently when I was put under to get chemotherapy in my spine, I yelled "demons! Demons! The Apocalypse is coming!" I had watched a whole marathon of Supernatural the day before. maciballz
Reddit user ILikeExistingLol asked: 'What's an absolutely devastating insult without any cuss words?'
When it comes to making a point, the stronger language you use, the better.
Sometimes, this is true of insults too. If you use strong language, the insult may hurt more. This language may include curse words. A lot of times, cursing while insulting someone is a surefire way to make sure the insult lands the way it was intended.
However, this is not always true.
Redditors know it's completely possible to deliver savage insults without using curse words, and are eager to share their favorites.
It all started when Redditor ILikeExistingLol asked:
"What's an absolutely devastating insult without any cuss words?"
""First of all, brush your teeth...""
"I literally just brushed my teeth because of this comment. I was gonna put it off for a little later, but I couldn't after reading that."
"A coworker who never showers, washes his clothes, or brushes his teeth was trying to intimidate me once and I told him the scariest thing about him was his breath. He hasn’t spoken to me since."
"“Well, at least you have more teeth than IQ points.”"
"About the same in his case, really."
Yikes! That Face!
""I never forget a face. But in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception.""
"– Groucho Marx"
""You have the face for a career in radio.""
""...and a voice for print.""
If Only We Never Met
"I miss the feeling of not knowing you."
"I think Shakespeare once said something along the lines of "I wish we were better strangers.""
Crime Against Humanity
"Have you ever considered that perhaps your low self-esteem is just good common sense?"
"I'd say shots fired but damn that's a nuclear warhead."
"“He’s a humble man with much to be humble about.”"
"Another Winston favorite: “Madam, I may be drunk, but you are ugly. Tomorrow, I will be sober.”"
"Some lady: “If you were my husband, I’d poison your drink.”"
"Churchill: “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”"
"May be slightly different wording."
"Lady Astor! She was an interesting person."
""I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong.""
""You're entitled to your opinion. It's wrong, but you're entitled to it.""
"A teacher called my son success-avoidant 3 years ago and he still thinks about that every day. But it did motivate him to get an A in that class, and all his other classes too!"
"Damn, a harsh truth can be very motivating."
What I Like About You
"“Do you know what I like about you?”"
"When they say “what?”, you reply, “See? You can’t think of anything either.”"
"These are always the most devastating ones, when you set them up to expect a compliment."
"It's risky though. If they actually give an answer, like some cocky "that i'm hot?" or whatever, then you'll have to think fast."
""No, that's definitely not it. I'll keep thinking, I'm sure something will come to me.""
Rumor Has It
""I had to see for myself, but people are absolutely right about you.""
"No cussing, no meanness, but they'll get paranoid about who's talking about them and their reputation."
Intelligence Called Out
"Your grades say marry rich, but your face says study harder."
"Please donate your brain to science, at least that way someone will actually use it."
"You are impossible to underestimate."
"You never fail to meet my expectations."
"You couldn't guess which way an elevator is going if you had three guesses."
"I love this insult because you have a moment of silence afterward as the insultee pieces it together."
I love that one; it's brilliant. I'm using this as soon as I get an opportunity!
I once worked in a cubicle farm doing finance and accounting. A new employee disappeared just a few hours after the day started.
Eventually they were found.
On the floor.
Under their desk.
They were promptly fired once they woke up. I wonder how their version of the story goes.
While that was a ridiculous way to be fired, for these folks, the employers were the ones with questionable judgment.
Reddit user strykazoid asked:
"What's the dumbest reason a job ever fired you?"
"I was 17. My Grandpa died unexpectedly from a heart attack. My Mother called my work’s office to let me know."
"I was called to the office to talk on the office phone to my mother, and staff (who were told what was going on) left the area so my mother could privately break the news to me."
"I was obliterated of course, and walked outside for about 15 minutes to clear my head. I then went back to work."
"The woman who was in charge of the entire operation fired me for leaving the building."
"Human Resources stepped in and stopped the situation before I could be notified that I had been fired."
"I only found out that this had happened after my grandpa's funeral days later."
"I quit immediately."
"I had an alcoholic handy man who was promoted to manager. This was a family owned restaurant and this guy had known the father of the current generation."
"He 'fired' me several times a week for not bumming him a cigarette or not wanting to work the second dining room when we had 5 reservations or taking my approved unpaid time off."
"But he was a drunk who started with scotch and moved into amaretto so never remembered."
"I'd just come back the next day."
"For surfing the internet."
"Punchline: part of my job was to surf the internet and find content for their social media platforms."
"I wish I was making that up. I am not."
Throwing Their Voice
"Fast food manager said a customer complained that he could hear me cussin' in the back."
"It was a couple days later when they fired me, but they said the incident happened on a day I happened to be off."
"I had a feeling the manager didn't like me much and planned poorly on when they'd claim the so called 'incident' happened."
"'I heard you cussin' when you weren't here. Don't ask me how that's possible'."
Not an Escort Service
"I was 16 and refused to date the owner’s niece."
"Do people think other people are property???"
"Yes. Many, many people who own or manage businesses think exactly this."
Last In, First Out
"In the days after 9/11 my employer (multinational bank) instantly fired the last 2 people hired in every department where there was redundancy, hedging against a financial collapse whenever the markets reopened."
"I just happened to be the last guy hired in my department."
Poor Pandemic Planning
"Covid-19 forced everyone to work from home on hastily setup computers and infrastructure."
"Then they fired the IT staff because we were deemed ‘nonessential’."
"Bit them in the a** hard enough to remove chunks."
Not a "Team Player"
"Not 'fired' but let go with severance. CFO told me to make up historical reports because they weren't done in the past, but now required, and wanted to show how so much better metrics are now than in the past."
"What they were asking for was literally not possible to do since the data was not tracked to what they were asking and wanted to tweak the past numbers into a full-on made-up breakdown."
"I told the controller I wasn't comfortable doing this. The next week I got paid out."
"A month later I found out the CFO was canned."
On Your Own Time
"Performance was bad. one of the reasons given was."
"'Reading newspapers in the lunch room'."
"Which was during my scheduled break."
"I wrote a video game script for a small developer. They 'forgot' to tell me when they started voice work—part of my job required me to help with voice acting sessions."
"I finally was invited to a session with a big name actor, especially known in video games. The director asked me why I hadn’t been present for the past two weeks’ worth of recording."
"Apparently, telling the truth, that no one had told me recording had begun, was the wrong move."
"The developers fired me the next day despite my work already being done, which essentially meant I’d have no part in DLC or sequel(s)."
Should Have Dropped Out
"I worked at Walmart while I was in high school and one of the managers kept scheduling me to open or for me to be there at 2."
"I told them, many times, that I was in high school and those shifts wouldn't work."
"I guess they didn't get that memo; the store manager fired me for missing work and being late."
What Do You Mean You Were Gone?
"Walmart fired me because they put out the schedule while I was on vacation and put me on the schedule during my approved days off."
"When I brought this up they just told me approved days off are just a suggestion but not guaranteed days off."
Good Customer Service
"I gave highway directions to a customer."
"They fired me for talking to my friends at work."
"I was a barista."
"Took a day off for my Grandpa's funeral which was out of town."
"Fired me when I came back the next day."
"My wife was fired for not coming to work after she found her father’s 2-day-old corpse in his apartment."
"She had to talk me down from some violent intentions towards her former employer."
Has an employer ever done you dirty for an absurd reason?
Sound off in the comments.
Anyone who has gone on a few dates knows a few things that they like and don't like to see in a relationship, and they definitely know what some of their dealbreakers are.
But there are some dealbreakers that, when looked at from the outside, are totally petty in nature.
Redditor bigdawgcat asked:
"What is the pettiest reason why you wouldn't date somebody?"
"I have a friend who stopped dating someone because he found out they were lactose intolerant."
"His example of why was, what if I taste a really great dessert, and I want to share the experience with her, and she can’t even taste it."
"I know someone who is allergic to alliums (garlic, onions, etc.). I could never date this person as there is no meal I could make which doesn't include them in some amount."
"Same with peanut allergies. I love peanut butter too much to start a relationship with someone who couldn't be in the same room with it, not when there are plenty of other wonderful people who can. If the allergy suddenly developed long into the relationship, that would be a different case."
The Ups and Downs of Physical Fitness
"A college friend of mine was dating a girl who was amazing, smart, and funny, and she had put on a few extra pounds recently, which bothered him (don’t shoot the messenger)."
"We were driving at night down a big hill on a hot summer night and saw a young woman running up the hill toward us, really sweating, face purple, and looking pretty haggard, huffing and puffing."
"He made a comment like, 'Holy s**t, this girl is struggling.' We got closer and realized it was her."
"Long awkward pause. 'Well, I’m going to have to break up with her,' he said."
"Fast forward six months, and we ran into her at a pub, and she was in absolutely perfect shape."
"When he tried to make a move, she told him aloud, in front of a table full of her friends, 'That she wasn’t interested in him, and that he had dumped her for getting fat.' Top five funniest takedowns I’ve ever seen."
"Fast forward 10 years, he’s been divorced twice and has had a long list of s**tty relationships. The end."
Conspiracy Theory Investment
"If they’re into conspiracy theories. I dated a guy who was and it consumed his life. It’s all he talked about."
"I couldn’t even watch a movie with him because he would talk through the whole thing about how it relates to certain conspiracy theories…"
"I also could never enjoy my food. We would make a big dinner on Friday nights to start the weekend, we both had a long day at work... we’d sit down to finally eat and he’d pull out his phone and put on conspiracy videos, and he’d make me watch them sooo loudly while I ate. And he’d talk through all of them too."
"I could never tell him that I wasn’t interested or I just wanted to eat because he’d get mad. It ruined my whole meal... I think most people like to eat in peace.. also he’d spend hundreds of items he needed in case we ever got attacked by 'skin walkers'... Never again."
"They slurp when they drink or smack when they eat."
"Soup should be seen and not heard."
Same Names, Same Problems
"I will never date or f**k another Anthony ever again. I’ve dated or had a relationship with three different Anthonys at three different ages and they all turned out badly."
"I had a friend years back that had three bad boyfriends, one after the other, each more of a D-bag than the last. Each one was named Rob."
"When talking to her one night, having a few beers, she complained that she always attracts d**kheads and then she asked what she should do. So having had a drink or six, I just blurted out, 'Maybe don't date anymore Robs.'"
"Anyway, the next guy she dated was Steve... they got married."
Love for Animals
"My cat said hello to her and she didn't say hi back."
"I had a one-night stand kick my cat off of the bed. First, never ever have I kicked a cat. But I did kick that guy out of my house and my life. Instantly. GET THE F**K OUT. NOW."
"Not petty. If someone ignored my dog greeting them, I would be put off, too."
Unexpected Sleeping Arrangements
"He slept in those tiny no-show socks. Let me be clear, he didn't wear them any other time than when he went to bed."
"There were some other, more real, red flags, but when I saw him whip them out and put them on the second time we slept together, I legitimately thought to myself: 'Actually, I don't think I can fix this one.'"
"He wore the same shirt on both of our dates.
Get this, years later, I get into the elevator at work and he's there. IN THE SAME SHIRT."
"I wanted so badly to demand to know if he has multiples or just one! Or find out which department he was in and stalk him. Unfortunately, I had given in my two weeks and didn't work in that building often."
"If a woman has a horse in her dating profile, you will never be more important than that horse."
"(It may be petty, but it's backed up by personal experience)."
"Horse girls do really love their horses, so I believe you. And I can't blame you."
"Worst of all, if you break up with the girl you won't be able to see the horse again! Imagine how heartbreaking that would be."
Social Media Schemes
If they have emojis like their signs, or money signs, or airplanes, or some s**t like that in their bio. Just seems like some scammer or Ponzi scheme s**t."
"Wasn't me, but a female friend broke up with a guy because 'his allergies were a sign of weakness.'"
"Yeah, I responded the same way you did."
"My brother believes this about my allergies. He thinks I 'shoulda grown out of it by now.' Infuriating."
Finals Week Troubles
"Because her eye was twitching while we were talking to each other. I was a dumb freshman in college. This girl was super attractive and smart, and we got along great."
"For some unfathomable reason, this made me want to not talk to her again."
"Later it dawned on me that it was during finals and she was heavily caffeinated and that can be a side effect. She dodged a bullet because I was a complete dingleberry, lol (laughing out loud)."
"I briefly dated a young woman who was insanely out of my league. People stared when we went out."
"Anyway, her voice was like Minnie Mouse, and I just couldn't take it. I still feel bad about that one."
"Not me, but I had a friend who wouldn’t date this guy because he had one crooked tooth. He was the nicest guy truly a wonderful person. Like if I hadn’t been in a serious relationship I would’ve dated this guy."
"Fast forward, he meets a wonderful woman, and they get married, and my friend was all weird about it."
"I asked why and she said, 'Well, I thought he liked me enough to get his twisted tooth fixed.'"
"It was the silliest thing I’ve ever heard."
Preferred Facial Features
"I knew and almost dated a girl who talked out the side of her mouth. I’m not sure if that’s the best way to describe it, but that’s all I thought about when she spoke."
"Like, the front of her lips barely moved, and it was like a weird little smirk kinda thing when she spoke. I couldn’t get past it."
"Weird ick: people with big/wide mouths. Why can I see all of your teeth and the back of your throat while you’re talking? You don’t need to open it that much just because you can."
When one Redditor wanted to hear others' "petty" reasons for not wanting to date someone, their fellow Redditors really delivered. While some of these could simply be a matter of taste, like finding some facial features attractive where others do not, some of these, like allergies, are pretty, pretty petty.
Generally speaking, we watch movies to escape our current realities and be transported to other worlds.
As a result, we don't always walk into movie theaters hoping for a truly authentic or genuine experience.
After all, how many people in real life actually met the love of their life at the top of the Empire State Building on Valentine's Day, after hearing them on the radio?
When it comes to historical fiction and dramas, however, some might say the facts and historical accuracy are a bit more important.
Indeed, part of the ongoing grudge over Shakespeare In Love's surprise Oscar victory over Saving Private Ryan was the latter was applauded for its accuracy, while the victor was anything but.
However, what probably helped in Shakespeare In Love's upset despite its many historical inaccuracies was that when push came to shove, it was a very good movie.
Redditor Agreeable-Beach-3009 was curious to hear what other films people thought were so good, that their anachronisms and inaccuracies should be overlooked, leading them to ask:
"What's a historically inaccurate movie that gets a pass because of how good it is?"
You Mean, Rasputin WASN'T A Demonic Sorcerer?
"Can you imagine getting murdered, then a movie gets made implying the woman who claimed your identity was the real deal and had to fight a freaky wizard's curse, and there were two knockoff movies made in the same year?"
"Songs were boppin tho."- vworpstageleft
"CRETACEOUS Park" Just Doesn't Have The Same Ring To It...
"Most of the dinosaurs you see in 'Jurassic Park' are actually from the Cretaceous Period."- 3loodwolf117
First Hand Accounts Were Probably A Bit Hard To Come By...
"Almost nothing about the movie 'Gladiator' is historically accurate, but it doesn't matter."
"S tier historical drama."- Pixelated_Penguin808Russell Crowe Gladiator GIF by MOODMANGiphy
Those Costumes Though!
"I feel like 'Amadeus' gets a pass because it's an adaptation of a stage play and as an adaptation, it's not trying to be historically accurate but to instead tell a great story, which it does phenomenally."- LadicusRex
Making His Lies Even More Far Fetched...
"Catch Me If You Can."- Bender_Wiggin
"While it all being bullsh*t does take some of the magic out of it, it’s still an entertaining story."
"And the soundtrack absolutely slaps."- rnilbog
It's Safe To Assume The Spanish Inquisition Had A Lot Less Singing And Dancing...
"History of the world part I."- whopper68
"Rome didn't have bullsh*t artists collecting unemployment?"
"Did Mel Brooks lie to me?"- CrunchyDonut42Giphy
Good Delivery Can Disguise Almost Anything...
"But I really do love it."- Iwouldntifiwereme
"Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life"
"The Life of Brian."- Visible_Claim_388
"'He’s not the messiah he’s just a naughty boy'."- dcrico20
For One Thing, Dogs Can't Talk...
"I love how the premise is that the little girl is telling the story as an old woman, but she was unconscious the whole time."
"She’s definitely pulling that shi* out of her a**."- TheFufe10sad shame GIFGiphy
There Is, Indeed, A Sucker Born Every Minute. Including Many Who Thought This Movie Told The Truth...
"'The Greatest Showman' makes PT Barnum look like a better person than he was in real life."- viridianvenus
He Was A Man Of Many Talents... This Wasn't One Of Them...
"Abraham Lincoln Vampire Slayer."- nogoat23
"That movie crosses the absurd into awesome, and I love it."- FactoryOfBradness
"A Knights Tale."- SoCalRc
"I always wondered how Queen never admitted to stealing such a banger from hundreds of years ago."- londoner4lifeheath ledger love GIFGiphy
Some Of The Irish Accents Were Less Than Authentic As Well...
"'Gangs of New York'."
"Historically accurate setting, costumes and some characters/gangs, but the plot and the events supporting it are largely fictional."
"Damn good movie though."- Lieutenant_Skittles
Tom Cruise Swinging A Sword Is More Than Enough For Some People...
"The Last Samurai."- The Last Samurai
"I was surprised at how good this movie was when I saw it this year for the first time."
"The costumes, action, and acting were all quite good."- OutlawQuill
More Memorable Than The Truth?
"The 1970 production 'Tora, Tora, Tora' pulled off one of the great cons of modern cinematography."
"It convinced an entire generation of Americans that after the sneak attack on Pearl Harbor, the Japanese Admiral Yamamoto had said 'I fear that all we have done is awaken a sleeping giant and fill him with a terrible resolve'."
"There is no evidence that the quote was ever spoken by Yamamoto."
"But it was so perfect and convincing that subsequent Hollywood movies released in 2001 (Pearl Harbor) and 2019 (Midway) unquestioningly passed it off as legitimate."- InstrumentRated
Movies are, first and foremost, a source of entertainment.
As a result, most viewers pay no mind at all to all the complaints historians and scholars may have about them.
If you're looking for speedy answers for a history test or essay, it's best to stick to the textbooks and not rely on Spielberg or Scorcese.