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This Person With Multiple Personalities Explains What It's Really Like

Thank you to Imgur user for sharing his experiences living with Dissociative Identity Disorder, previously known as Multiple Personality Disorder. Hopefully this can open up a conversation about a much-stigmatized topic, and allow people to understand it a little bit more. Because knowledge is power!


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First, to answer some basic questions...

What caused me to develop MPD/DID?

I will answer this question at the end, because it's a bit traumatic so I don't want to start with something so dark. Most MPD/DID is usually caused by a severely traumatic event/s.

What is a "switch"?

A switch is the moment an alternate personality (a.k.a alter) takes over and I loose all track of time.

What causes a switch?

Many things can trigger a switch. Anything from a song or smell, but usually it's caused by large amounts of stress (for me anyways).

Do I know whats going on when I switch?

No. With the exception of one time, it's usually like flicking a light switch of snapping your fingers. One moment I'm living my life then in the blink of an eye it could be 5 hours later.

What is the longest switch that has happened?

17 years. I'm the primary personality but not the original. I have been in control for most of our life. But occasionally the others wrestle control from my hands.

Can others tell when I've switched (or I'm about to)?

Yes. when I'm about to switch I develop an uncontrollable tick in my jaw (sometimes a strong tick that looks like a seizure. It usually happens because I'm fighting back).

How different is each alter?

Apparently each alter talks, walks, writes, eats and has sex differently (yes.. I just said that)

Is it painful to switch alters?

From time to time. It can be violent (for me)

How many "Alters" Do I have?

4 but it used to be 6. I have (with professional help) managed to integrate 2 alters (making me more "whole")

Can I "hear" my alters?

For the longest time... No. But about 3 years ago I began hearing Fynn in my head (you will learn about him soon enough). I thought I had schizophrenia but after some testing we found out I didn't. As for the others.. I don't want to hear them.

Okay, here are some stories...

1. So here's how it all started...

The start of the blank spots. One of the first times I developed a blank spot (switch) I lost 4 hours. Thankfully it happened at home around my (now) ex-wife. She was only my GF at the time though. I was standing in the kitchen making some soup when I was suddenly standing in the backyard with my GF looking at me very strangely. All I could say was "what the hell just happened?". I didn't understand what was going on and my GF wouldn't tell me anything. I didn't find out that my first alter had shown up until one month later when she finally broke down and said I turned into a very intelligent child before her eyes who called himself Fynn (my favorite alter). I spoke with a lisp and knew things about my childhood that I normally couldn't remember. It was then that I began seeking professional help. Many people trained in psychology will agree that those who have MPD/DID are either faking it or too much of a risk to treat (it could ruin their career). So finding help was hard. Very hard.

I just remember those days as being very taxing and frightening. It's not easy having doctors think you are lying.

2. The Day The Doctors Believed...

I will never forget the moment I was finally able to get help. D.I.D was starting to take its toll on me. I had a nervous break down. I was brought to the hospital and they were (Continued)


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told about my issue. Of course they scoffed like I said, it's common for psychologists to believe that DID is a made up thing. But it didn't last long. They had taken me into triage so they could get my vitals. Everything was through the roof. They were worried I was going to have a heart attack or something. It was at that moment that I switched (in front of EVERYBODY). Just like a light switch. My vitals returned to normal and I was sitting calmly while looking at everybody. My GF at the time knew what was up and said "FYNN!! Let him back out NOW! In moments my vitals were back to critical levels. I didn't know any time had passed. But the look of shock on the face of everybody in the room said enough. Needless to say... I began receiving the help I needed.

Most of this was told to me by the doctors and my GF. I didn't truly get to witness it.

3. The time Fynn saved my family.

This story happen 7 years ago. I know this because my son is 7 years old. At this point my wife was now my ex and I was happily with somebody who cared about me and understood what living with D.I.D meant. We were about to have a baby and I was also going back to school to get my G.E.D. I was running on very little sleep. When my son was born I had everything set. I had just moved back to my home state and was staying with my aunt. Crib.. check, diapers.. check, nursery.. check, All the things.. CHECK!! Son enters the world.. check. Then things went bad.

I came back to the hospital after school, exhausted and barely able to hold my head up. I entered the room and my GF was crying in her bed and my son was nowhere to be seen. I panicked. It was then that a child services worker came in to give me bad news. Apparently my GF's ex-husband (a monstrous piece of crap who is currently in jail for some very bad things) had managed to (Continued)


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use his connections to add red flags to my GF's file. They were going to take my son away from me.

I fought it.

Fought it hard right then and there. In the end they gave me 10 hours to produce a child friendly environment at some place other than my aunt's house. My only option was my hoarder grandmother. I got to the house only to find that the room I could use was piled to the ceiling with crap. I broke down. Then the singularly most wonderful thing about having MPD/DID happened to me... I switched.. Fynn (that wonderful guy) stepped up and took over. In 8 hours he managed to clean the entire room. He not only cleaned it.. He frigging set it up. It was perfect. And for me it all happened in the blink of an eye. It was like magic. To this day my (now) fianc still worships the ground he walks on (and so do I).

This is why I will always be happy to hear Fynn.

4. April Fools... D.I.D Style

This is less of a story and more of a statement...

You think getting pranked on April 1st sucks? Try having multiple people in your head taking turns setting up traps for you. Most of them were harmless but I really didn't care for finding thumb tacks in my bed.

5. The Ultimate Goal

Anybody who truly suffers from MPD/DID has one goal in mind... Integration. We want to turn all the people in ours heads back into ONE person! I have managed to integrate 2 so far. On one occasion when integration occurred, my crippling fear of spiders disappeared. Really went away. At one point I would scream and run if a spider came within 5 feet of me. Now I play with them.

Its just one of those things that makes me stop and think "wow" the human brain can do some cool/weird stuff.

6. The Day Fynn Made Me Watch

Don't get ahead of yourself. Let me tell the story before you judge the title. Now from time to time I've (Continued)


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Now from time to time I've learned that my alters all seem to hold a fragment of the original person. I'm calm, casual and creative (I'm a blacksmith and prop maker). Fynn hold the memories (childhood and stuff like that) plus he is the only one that can speak to the others. Then we have Arsehole. He holds on to obscene amounts of anger and resentment. So fast forward to 10 months ago. Stress was beginning to build again but not in a serious way. Just enough to annoy Fynn. I hadn't been eating much (which is Fynn's biggest peeve) so it was time for me to learn about another trick Fynn was hiding up his sleeve.. he could make me.. watch. Talk about messed up.. imagine only being able to look through the eyes of another person without having control over what they do or say. It could have been worse than it was. Instead of something horrible happening, Fynn forced me to watch as he ordered FIVE 20 piece nuggets McDonalds and ate 4 of the boxes. I threw up soooo bad and had the poops for a week.

Fynn.. I love you.. but eff you for that one!

7. Sometimes I read letters written to me by an alter

Because people have asked.. Yes.. I occasionally find letter from Fynn, but it's usually when I'm down and he's trying to make me smile. My favorite one was when Fynn wanted to let me know that he fed the baby and changed his diaper so I could rest (yeah.. that's a bit weird)

8. Not all alters are nice

Let me tell you about the First Appearance of The Arsehole

Not all alters are nice. But this was the first time the original had made an appearance since this all started so it was rather tame. I was talking to my fianc when I noticed she was getting more and more upset but I wasn't doing anything. It all ended in a massive blow up. Later on when we were ready to talk again I started hearing about things I said that I didn't remember saying. It wasn't until Fynn's next appearance that we found out Arsehole was switching in for small moments and adding his own comments to our conversation. Fynn was upset as well.

8. This is the story of how my MPD/DID started...

WARNING!! Things are about to get bad people. This is your chance to stop reading because things are about to get graphic (stories not pics). Starting with how I got MPD/DID....


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How I got MPD/DID... Mine was worked on most of my childhood. But the fracturing event (the event that literally "splits" my personalities) came in my late teens. I had made some bad choices and gotten into some hardcore drugs. Over time I ended up owing money to a fairly large drug dealer (something you don't want to do). I was grabbed off the street and held captive in a motel while they reenacted the chainsaw scene from the movie Blow. Yes.. a person who owed a lot more money than I, was taught a permanent lesson. Watching somebody get dismembered has a way of destroying a person mentally. I was then dropped on the side of the highway a couple states away from home with nothing but a pair of pants. This is my first memory. Not knowing my name wandering around the streets. I had a cellphone but didn't know how to use it. The original had checked out (for good it had seemed). It was now my job to live this life.

I started getting comfortable with switching (for the most part) but then the Arsehole decided to come back out after a very long hiatus. But he was different. Bitter, anger, vengeful, potentially violent. I didn't/don't trust him. He stayed out for 3 days. 3 days of nightmare for my fianc. All he wanted to do was get high or hurt me. He resented that it wasn't his life anymore and he had a response. But I didn't find out until I regained control. It was then I felt pain in bad places.

Apparently he had decided that if he couldn't live "his" life then he was going to make mine as miserable as possible. He started with a razor blade and began carving EVERYTHING. I had officially stepped out of the world of strange and into the world of terror. I had somebody in my head that I couldn't get rid of that was dead set on inflicting as much pain on our body as possible. Thankfully there was no lasting damage with my bits but my torso will be forever covered in scars.

Arsehole truly hated me. The carving sessions started becoming a regular event. I had to do something about it. In come the doctors and the meds. But nothing helped. Oddly enough, he didn't start to calm down until I started making a collection of first person shooters for him. It seams to be his muse. He's never truly happy but there are few things that can be done. I need to work on integrating him but the idea scares the heck out of me.

At the worst.. doctors have counted over 800 slice marks over my body (not scars). It's painful and scary and it forces a level of paranoia in me. I now have to ask myself after a switch, "What have i done?" "Have I hurt anybody?" "Am I hurt?". These are questions nobody should have to ask. but it was a fact of my life at that point. That was a year ago. With help I have had only 1 day of switching in that time (yesterday). Which leads me to one of the scariest things that can happen to me.

9. Occasionally I will switch and be truly lost

Sometimes I can't find myself anywhere. Waking up in the middle of a forest (clothed) covered in mud when you were just taking a bath is traumatizing in itself. But it's these things you learn to live with. As for this problem itself. I have started trying to create a GPS system in my shoes so I will never be lost again.

Also, for the record, these are my personal experiences. I don't know how they compare to other MPD/DID cases. I'm only going by what I've witnessed and been told by those who were around when I switched.

Now for some follow up questions...

What does integration feel like?


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Nothing. It feels like nothing at all. Just one day you are... different.

How old is Fynn? Does he age?

He started out telling everybody he was 7 but a few years ago somebody told him it was his birthday.. he has been 9 ever since. Yeah, it's weird. (I heard my family talking about this earlier today)

You said there were 4 alters. What about the 4th?

We don't know a lot about him. He's only come out once, looked around and found himself disgusted with humanity in general. He didn't stay out long and hasn't been back since.

I've read articles saying MPD is fake. Why should I believe you?

I don't care if you believe me. But if it's because of my use of the term MPD, I use it because not a lot of people know what D.I.D is. D.I.D is indeed REAL.

What do you think of shows like Split or United States of Tara?

I've never seen em. I don't watch many movies and I never watch movies involving D.I.D expect fight club (because I didn't know that is what is was about) due to the chances it could cause a switch.

If you aren't the original, are you an alter?

Yes. But I have been out so long that most people in my life know me instead of others.

Is "Arsehole" The Original?

I thought so but that has been brought into question.

How do relationships work? Do different alters have different partners?

In a way, yes. I'm still trying to figure out how to answer this one in a way that's easily understood.

Does Arsehole have a name?

Yes. But I don't use it. I will only call him an arsehole.

Have you ever played games with any alters? Like chess with Fynn or something?

Yes actually. I love chess but Fynn is better. The day will come when i beat him :)

So the original was into drugs, are you drug free? If so, did you feel withdrawal symptoms or know that's what they were?

He was into cocaine. I don't remember if I got sick or not. It was a long time ago. Though I can tell if an alter has taken anything.

Do you know who your parents are?

Yes. My mother is a wonderful person. My father is not so wonderful.

You mentioned you had 6 alters before you integrated the other two. What were the other 2 like?

One was a female child named Purrecka who hated watermelon and loved getting into trouble. The other was just an angry dude. Nobody ever got to ask him his name. He's also the one that liked spiders.

If you think you have D.I.D...

If you find yourself asking the question "Do I have D.I.D?" or "What can I do to find out if i have D.I.D?" You need to do the leg work. You have a task ahead of you. Start with questions. 1st. whats causing this concern?

2nd. Am I blacking out? If yes: am I moving while blacked out? Am I talking to people? Do I act weird? When I wake up am O standing or on the ground? If you find yourself answering yes to these questions seek a doctor. Seriously. Before you can even think about D.I.D you need to eliminate all other possibilities. Blacking out can mean other things. Blacking out then waking up but acting different or talking funny could mean seizure. That's no laughing matter. Seizures can make people do strange things. Make sure you are perfectly healthy. But to do that you need a doctor's help.

3rd. When did it start?

4th. Were others around? Can they tell you about it?

5th. Look into your past. Most real D.I.D cases originate at an early age (like 7 or younger). At that age the level of elasticity is more fragile. Think of it this way.

6th. invest in a small camera for your home or person so you can hopefully catch one of these moments.



Source

Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

boy playing at laptop inside room
Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

Person holding large stack of books
Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

south park wedding GIF Giphy

See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

homer simpson episode 23 GIF Giphy

Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

Disney World GIF Giphy

The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.