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Pizza Delivery People Reveal The Most Bizarre Thing That's Happened To Them On The Job.

Pizza Delivery People Reveal The Most Bizarre Thing That's Happened To Them On The Job.

Here's your pizza! I'm going to run away now.



Thanks to all the pizza delivery people from Tip the Pizza Guy, Reddit, and Quora who shared their story.

1. I delivered pizza for many years. There was a regular who was a great tipper, so we always fought over who got to deliver to this guy. One time he called in an unusually large order and I was the lucky person who got to go. Yay! Turns out he was having a get together and there were a bunch of dudes in his apartment. I saw a lot of little glass bowls all around the kitchen. Then, my jaw dropped. I realized that all the dudes were holding fistfuls of money and that the bowls were filled with beta fish. They were betting on fish fights.

NorDeast

2. Once had a delivery to a house that was in one of the rich neighborhoods. I pull up to the house, drive down a long-ass driveway, and when I finally get to the door, I see an envelope taped to it. There is nothing written on it except Dominos on one side, and leave on doorstep on the other. Inside is enough money to cover the pizza and a $10 tip.

I look around kind of awkwardly, before setting the pizzas on the doormat, and putting the money in my pocket. While Im walking back to my car, I turn back around to look at the house, and lo and behold, the pizzas are no longer on the doormat. I didnt hear a door, and it hadnt been but 4 or 5 seconds since I had turned around. I also notice as I was getting back in my car, that there were cameras all around the perimeter of the house on the walls, painted the same color as the house to blend in. I drove away, pretty sure I delivered to a ghost..

- Anonymous

3. So our shop closes at 10 PM. At 9:55 the phones rings. It's the ring of death. No one wants to take this call, but what if it's the boss? He has been known to pull this on closes.

So I answer and am greeted with an obviously drunk woman's voice asking if we are still open. Now I am intrigued. Drunk and high deliveries are sometimes the best.

(Continued...)


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...So I get to the address, knock, and a woman in skimpy see-through lingerie answers. She falls against the door and then me and asks me to help her to the couch. I move into the room and there is another woman seated at a table wearing even less. The room stinks of pot and a huge bong is sitting on the coffee table. These two are hot and may as well be naked so I am enjoying the show. I ask, "Who gets it?" holding up the receipt and they both giggle and the one on the couch says, "Both of us, hopefully." So I am thinking maybe going back to the shop isn't going to happen tonight. Then I hear a toilet flush and out walks a HUGE man. I mean like 6'6" plus and had to weigh 350 or more. Wearing a woman's pink dressing gown and nothing else. Needless to say, I got the hell out of there as fast as possible. Good tip, though.

Jest28000

4. I'm 21 and I work for a local pizza chain, Pizza Hotline, in Winnipeg, Manitoba. After two and a half years of working part time at this job, I finally have something to tell people when they ask me, "Do you have any interesting stories?!?!" This happened to me last week, May 2014.

It was approximately 3 AM, right before close, and I'm on a delivery in a new area. The streetlights haven't been installed, and so I can't see the house numbers because it's so dark. I call the customer, and she told me to meet her at a location just on the other side of a street. As I wait, I light up a cigarette and turn up Whitesnake on the dial. I'm delivering in my Mustang convertible which I don't usually do but this Saturday night was particularly nice and warm and I was feeling pretty good since my shift was nearly done.

A few minutes later a little BMW begins to pull up, and I breathe a sigh of relief. See, in my area, most of the luxury cars are driven by rich international students, and they usually tip well. So a tiny cute girl comes out and I begin to read her the total on the bill. Instead of listening, she takes a look at my car and me for a moment, and asks if I want to come back to her place for a drink. I tell her I have to do one more delivery and I can come back.

I go on my next delivery, return to the store to do my closing duties, and I quickly zip on out of there and make my way back to her place. Throughout this time, she kept on texting, telling me that she thought I was cute. I knew what was about to go down.

Anyways, I show up to the house, and turns out there are three other international students there. I was hoping it would just be her, but they were giving me beer and cigarettes so I didn't complain. We hung out until 5 AM when the host starts asking us to leave. He also tells me that I am invited to a big party the next night, and that the girl will text me when I should come over. As we all start getting into our cars, I get a text from the girl asking if I want to go back to her place and drink some more. Well, I did go to her place, and a lot more than just drinking went on for the next few hours.

Oh, and she tipped me $3 on a $15 order. Not bad.

- Mustang Sally

5. I was working for Domino's in Agawam, MA a couple of years ago. I had a delivery to a hotel in our delivery area. When I got there I saw two guys standing outside the room. Turns out they were plain clothes police officers doing a drug bust.


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They had me stand outside the door while they stood off to either side of the door. One of them knocked. When they answered the door, one of the cops flashed his badge. Guy had a large bag of weed on the nightstand. Cop made them pay me first before he busted them. No tip of course. Wonder if they ever got to eat the pizza.

- Undercover brother

6. Woman showed up to the door topless. Pretty sure she expected more than a pizza from me.

Alex Schamenek

7. Delivered pizzas in North Dakota and always used to get some weirdos: dirt roads were always a bad sign. One time I arrive at the address in a trailer park, and there is a note on the door that says, "Please come inside, money is on the counter." Whatever, I head in there, and there is a $20 bill sitting there for a $26 order. Great, so I decide to wait, but after about five minutes it's starting to look like a lost cause. I call them up to see what's up, and a woman answers. I explain to her that she's a little short and she says, "Yeah I know, didn't you see my note?"

I told her I did see the note, which is how I knew they were $6 short. "No, the other note. The one on the microwave."

Turning my head, I see a post-it note with the words "Pawn Me" scribbled on it. "You want me to pawn your microwave to make up the difference?" "Yes," she said, "We do it a lot. There's a pawn shop right next door and they usually give me around $20 for it. That should cover the bill and give you a tip for your troubles." I wasn't totally sure if this was legal, but I ventured over to the pawn shop, and he did indeed give me $20 for it. I asked if this was common and the guy working the counter said I was the 4th delivery guy that month to come in with that microwave. Hey, at least I got a $14 tip out of it!

rutgerswhat

8. I work for a Cottage Inn Pizza in a small town in southeast Michigan. Most of our delivery radius involves back roads and quite rural areas. I am a closing driver three nights a week and I've dealt with all the usual BS drivers face: stiffed in crap weather, stiffed on an order placed a few minutes before closing, customer who decides to take a shower during the time I am at their door, etc. But THIS was something I had never experienced before.

About an hour before closing, I take a delivery to an address on a backroad at the very end of our radius (so far the address is in the town over.) Anyways, it was impossible to find one visible address on this street. After several failed attempts of driving back and forth on the block searching for the house, the only driveway I tried was a super sketchy, clearly old and condemned home. And I mean condemned looking like the set of a cliche horror movie.

I call the number on the ticket, explain that I am on their street however having a very difficult time finding their house, and I tried to get some directions from the polite woman on the phone.

After several attempts to understand where their house was at, I still was unsure so I mentioned the abandoned home and asked if it was near that. She says, "Yes. That is next door to us, and our porch light is on."

About 20 yards or so from the decrepit house there is a very small grey house with not a single light on besides the porch light. The driveway is so screwy that I accidentally drove onto the grass lawn.

This home was also very beat up and vacant looking, with the super creepy home built practically on top it. However, it isn't unusual for us to deliver to homes kinda beat up so I ignore this and just walk up and knock. I always do five loud knocks, count to thirty seconds and if I don't hear any signs of movement I repeat this, and after the second or third time around I call up the customer.

I call up the lady again and tell her that I believe that I am at her door and ask if it is the grey home with the red shed nearby. After calling, I get an answer along the lines of, "That's part of the vacant property. We are one driveway over from there." Then it hits me.


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Then it hits me that I AM ALL ALONE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE WALKING AROUND A CONDEMNED PROPERTY LATE AT NIGHT.

I'VE SEEN QUITE A FEW HORROR MOVIES THAT SHOW AN ANONYMOUS DELIVERY DRIVER GETTING VICIOUSLY KILLED IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS.

Anyways, I was able to get back to my car and finally found the customer's home. When I pull up there was a friendly looking older man outside. I apologized for the confusion and perhaps breaking the customer-employee boundary slightly, I said, "Jeez, that house next door gives me the creeps. I've seen some movies with delivery drivers not too different than myself in situations like that except I'm not gonna say what happened to them." The man seemed quite friendly and found this funny.

ANYWAYS... it was a $31 order.

He hands me $40 and says, "I really appreciate you coming all the way out here. I know our house isn't the easiest to find. Keep the change."

People like this make me love my job.

- Sameesy

9. I used to deliver pizzas back in high school. One night a call came from the town over from us for just a large pizza. I pack up the pizza, drive over there and notice when I approach the house there are cars lining up and down the street, it seemed like a party was going on, and that's exactly what it was when I got to the front door. I knocked loudly and a girl who was about 17 (remember I was still in high school) comes to the door in her bra and panties, sprays whip cream all over herself and says lick it off.

I'm just standing there with a pizza just trying to make sense of all this. Before I know it another guy from the party comes to the door and for some reason says "I'll give you a $10 tip if you lick this off her" (I was going to do it for free anyways). So I gave the guy the pizza, sucked off all that whip cream, said goodbye and she closed the door. They were happy, I was happy. And that, my friends, was the greatest delivery I've ever had.

klussier9

10. Pizza Delivery in college in Central PA (relevant background information: I'm Korean):

Arrived at the front door of an older couple's house with a large pie in hand. When I rang the doorbell, the woman came out and I said, "I have your delivery." She looks at me puzzingly and says, "We didn't order no Chinese food." Of course, I had to explain that I was just the delivery guy and I had their large pizza in hand.

hanboy

11. There was one delivery I would always make to a house, and a little girl (maybe 10) would always answer the door and pay for the pizza. That wasn't too weird - kids like to pay for pizzas a lot. The orders were sometimes early in the evening, sometimes late.

One evening I delivered a pizza to her, and she didn't have enough money. I suggested she go get one of her parents, and she said her mom wasn't there, and her daddy "wasn't alive anymore". I asked when her mom might be back (thinking she ran out somewhere), and the girl said "Thursday".

It was Monday.


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I said are you sure, and she said yes her mommy's boyfriend lives in [nearby town] and she leaves on Monday and comes back on Thursdays "most of the time". I asked about grandma, any family, friends, etc. - no, no, no, no.

So, I sort of sat there wondering "well, what do I do now?". I thought about giving her the pizza and saying, "here you go, bye".

After one of those "probably only 10 seconds but feels like an eternity" moments I asked if I could borrow her phone (this was pre-cell phones). I called the police and sat on the steps with the little girl until the police arrived.

She talked about her cat that ran away, and her my little ponies, and gave me a friendship bracelet. I noticed her hair and clothes were dirty. I thought about this poor girl just sitting in her house for days at a time completely alone.

The police came, I told them my story, and they told me to leave -- not sure whatever happened to her. No pizza orders from that house anymore -- I would check all of the orders whenever I worked.

- [deleted]

12. I delivered pizza a few years ago to put myself through paramedic school. This was at a slightly lower known national pizza chain in East Valley, AZ. For the most part it was a blast and I made a lot of good friends, made some decent money, and honestly miss those days. I have a million stories from those days but the best ones have already been told here: naked girl sleepovers, swinger couple offering to "tip" me in other ways, and armed robbery. The ones that stand out to me after the extreme things are all of the 12-15 year olds put in charge of handling the money transaction for the parents.

I delivered a few pies to a home well out of our delivery area. I took the phone order and told the mother that she was out of the area but since it was a slow night and I was the driver I would do it, but not to expect this treatment every time. She was very happy and thanked me profusely.

So after a 20 minute drive I rang the doorbell and was greeted to a 12 year old kid. I told him the total was $19.76 and noticed he was holding 3 $10 bills. The kid was slick with his mom doing dishes about 10 feet behind him and looked back at her a few times before handing me 2 of the $10s and slipping the last one into his pocket.


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"That's $20 little man," I said loudly enough for the mom to hear. "Would you like your 24 cents back?"

The kid turned ghost white. Mom noticed what happened and immediately gave him a tongue lashing, and handed me the extra 10 saying, "God bless you for making such a far trip."

- PizzaMedic

13. I worked at a chain store in Baltimore, MD during college. I once had a horrendous customer and never forgot her address. She ordered four pizzas that were part of a $5.99 each special but then called back 5 minutes later to complain that her bill was too high. After explaining to her that the total was in fact correct, she told me to cancel two of the pizzas (which were already halfway through the oven.) I got stuck taking the order so I prepared myself for the inevitable no-tip.

When I got to her apartment, rap music was blasting and I had to bang on the door for at least two minutes. Finally a man answered and told me he would go get the girls who ordered the pizza. A raggedy looking woman came and grabbed the pizzas out of my hand. She said, "I better go make sure you didn't mess these up!" and went away. Another man came and stood in the doorway and started chatting with me. After a few minutes, I asked them if they could go get the person who paid for the food to sign for it. Suddenly a large woman appeared at the door and started screaming at the two men to "stop talking to the stupid pizza guy!" as she snatched the pen and receipt out of my hand. She threw the pen back at me, hitting me in the chest, and slammed the door in my face. I pissed all over her doorknob before I left.

- Eric

Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

boy playing at laptop inside room
Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

Person holding large stack of books
Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

south park wedding GIF Giphy

See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

homer simpson episode 23 GIF Giphy

Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

Disney World GIF Giphy

The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.