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People Share The Worst Justifications For Cheating On Their Significant Other

People Share The Worst Justifications For Cheating On Their Significant Other

People Share The Worst Justifications For Cheating On Their Significant Other

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Y'all grab yourselves a bottle of whatever and a cookie. Some people will use any reason and I mean... ANY reason to dabble outside of a relationship. FYI... there is no viable excuse to betray your significant other but... I'm listening! But BYE FELICIA!!

Redditor FuschiaDinosaur wondered What's the worst excuse you've heard to justify cheating?

YOUR MEMORY NEEDS A BEAT DOWN.

"You weren't around and she reminded me of you so you should feel flattered"

THEN JSUT SAY SEX ONLY! NO JUDGEMENT.

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"I'm young and don't want to be tied down to somebody".

That's fine, but instead of cheating on somebody who thinks you actually care about them, specify that you're not looking for anything serious to begin with.

OH PLEASE!

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"I felt like I wasn't good enough for you"

PARDON ME CRAZY?

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"Just because you've made me so happy, happier than any other guy, doesn't mean I should stay with you any longer."

ACCIDENTS "DON'T" HAPPEN!!

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"It was an accident."

Moron. You don't just get naked, crawl into bed, and screw five or six times.

I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU! LOL

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"I relapsed." Lol right. Turns out she relapsed a lot.

STICK WITH THE CLASSICS.

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"One thing led to another"

STOP BLAMING YOUR PARENTS!

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My dad did it and its in my genes.

MAYBE TALK TO YOUR PARTNER? DUH!

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Buddy to me -"Dude... I just can't do my wife like I do my girlfriend. I respect my wife too much to do that."

SERIOUSLY?

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"I didn't think the Konami code would work irl."

AHHH THE CLASSICS PART 2.

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"I was really drunk"

SO IT'S ME. SORRY? YOU... $#$$%^^%$#$%

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"You were depressed." Gee well now I'm over the moon.

GOOD FOR YOU. BYE!

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I had the opportunity to.... So I took it.

WELL LET ME GET MY PASSPORT!!

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"I was in a totally different country."

MY FAVORITE!!!

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We were on a break!!

DON'T BE A TAYLOR SWIFT SONG.

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Girlfriend's ex-roommate was notorious for this:

"My ex cheated on me."

"I'm a different person now."

"Practically broken up." After she slept with her now former bestie's soon-to-be ex and said bestie asked her to tell the truth.

"We're not that serious or in love."

"I don't see it going anywhere, you guys wouldn't understand." After we asked her why she was sleeping with another guy when she was still in a committed relationship.

Bonus points for gf's mom outing her cheating in front of him by accident, while he was about to help move her (the cheater's) stuff to another city.

WHO AM I? WHERE AM I?

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"That's not who I am, I am going through a ton of stuffright now, so I wasn't myself". Wtf does that have to do with anything?

SOME PEOPLE NEED TO A GOOD SMACK!!! OR SIX!

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"Yes I have been cheating on my boyfriend, but look at him, he is too ugly to be loved. So I told him either he accepts that I will have sex with other people, or I will dump him and he will never have a girlfriend again."

And that was the moment I realized I was no longer friends with her.

For the record, he broke with her two years later but only after she took a lot of money from his disability checks. He is dating a much nicer (and beautiful) girl now.

SORRY... IT'S YOU!

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"You're obviously not doing something right."

BEAT YOU!!! I WIN?

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"I think he might cheat since we're long distance until (two months from that day). If he cheats on me, I'll be devastated. So I want to cheat on him first. That way if he ever tells me he cheated on me during this time, I can tell him I cheated first to piss him off. I mean he might not cheat, but if he does, I need to be able to tell him I cheated first."

IT'S OK... I'LL STRANGLE YOU WITH MY SHOELACES!

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"I tripped!"

Conspiracy Theories With A Surprising Amount Of Evidence To Back Them Up

Reddit user Specific_Shop_3975 asked: 'What’s a conspiracy with the most evidence to back it up?'

Man thinking hard
Photo by jose aljovin on Unsplash

We've all heard our fair share of conspiracy theories, and whether or not we truly believe them, we can agree that they're fun to think about.

But there are some that are more sinister than others, and some that are far too applicable to simply ignore.

Redditor Specific_Shop_3975 asked:

"What's a conspiracy with the most evidence to back it up?"

The Sinking of RMS Lusitania

"The British government deliberately put the RMS Lusitania in harm's way to get her sunk to bring the USA into WW1. The fact the records have been resealed for another 100 years adds credence to this conspiracy."

- Blackmore_Vale

"Dude, it's not even a conspiracy theory. The German consulate took out a two-page ad in the New York Times telling people to not board because they were going to sink it."

"Also at the time Britain didn't have an option but to sell the ship because it was carrying so many munitions that they desperately needed. This isn't a conspiracy theory; it's just plain fact."

"Both governments knew the risks and they needed it to galvanize support."

- hagantic42

Not So Sweet Candy Stores

"In the UK, there was a recent boom in American sweet shops that sold grossly overpriced import candy. They were suddenly everywhere after the pandemic, they didn’t sell much, but they were everywhere."

"Someone on TikTok theorized that they were all money laundering fronts, so people started filming in the shops laughing at the prices, and staff always seemed to get really angry about it."

"Then it was announced last year that there was an HMRC (UK’s tax wing of government) investigation started because the theory held water, and suddenly they all shut down."

"The one in Leeds Centre near Trinity currently has a notice of abandonment in the window and you can see the shelves are still stocked: the owners just ran off and left it."

"Sounds like another successful case for the TikTok detectives."

- fearthe0cean

What's Behind the Price of a Piece of Art

"Modern art is just money laundering."

"Nobody pays 2.2 million for a blank canvas."

- Poultry_Master123

"The brilliance of modern art money laundering can't be understated."

"Alfred wants to pay Brad $100k for a bribe."

"Brad wants this money to be 'clean' to avoid authorities looking into him."

"Brad 'sells' a worthless modern art piece for $100k."

"Alfred has now successfully transferred the bribe to Alfred. However, Brad is now in possession of a painting that the 'market' says is worth $100k. Down the line, Alfred might be able to sell this now 'valuable' piece of art to a third party for $50k, $100k, or potentially at a profit!"

"It can get even more complex when the artist is basically a part of the money laundering ring. This makes it so that Brad can fictionally increase the cost of buying the art from the artist in the first place in order to make the money laundering less obvious."

- Zigxy

Why So Many Options?

"There is something fishy going on at Mattress Firm. How can they stay in business with a store in practically every plaza when the average person buys a new mattress every decade or so?"

- PWcrash

Quite the Distraction

"Might not be a 'conspiracy theory' per se. But I believe that the government works hard to cover up their own incompetence."

"Part of that is manufacturing insane conspiracy theories as a way to make anyone who asks questions look crazy. Or at least to serve as a distraction."

- ButtFarquad66

A Conspiracy Is a Conspiracy

"The meta-conspiracy to convince dumb people that the word 'conspiracy' means 'a crazy person’s imagination.'"

"Conspiracies happen every day. There’s a global conspiracy of adults to convince kids Santa is real. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it’s a conspiracy."

"Somewhere along the line, the word got hijacked and it immediately discredits whoever says it. It’s practically a trap to use the word, so you have to dance around it if you want to describe people planning things in secret."

- Bob_the_peasant

Widely Discredited

"The government deliberately leaked false information to UFO investigators to discredit them because they were getting too close to the truth."

"(The truth being that Area 51 was a testing grounds for spy planes and stealth aircraft and was attracting too much attention for a secret weapons facility.)"

- 4thofeleven

"I think the government does this with conspiracy theories across the board. Promoting outlandish tinfoil hat-type theories helps discredit the ones that are actually real."

- QUINNFLORE

Another Money Laundering Front

"Benetton is a front for Italian mob money laundering."

"Probably wasn't at first back in the 80s but now... decent-sized stores in expensive real estate all over Europe, never anyone in the stores, never seen anyone wearing the clothes, don't know anyone that's bought anything from them, ever, and neither do those people."

- Bannedin_3_2_1

"I shop there all the time, in both Italy and Switzerland. It’s the highest quality for the most reasonable price that I can regularly find in Europe. I’m never the only one in there or checking out, either."

- AdultDisneyWoman

"Sounds like something a money launderer would say."

- kjm16216

Residential Monopoly

"Blackrock and Vanguard are buying up all the residential property they can in order to get the majority of Americans renting from them. Estimates say by 2030 they will own 60% of residential property."

- smartsapants

"I so wish we could all stop fighting about dumb sh*t for just a few weeks so both sides of the country could pass a law that bans any corporation or non-US citizen from owning residential property(with some provisions to account for things like bank loans obviously)."

"This would have such a massive effect on quality of life going into the future. Of course, it won’t happen."

- ternic69

People of Influence Parties

"The Bilderberg group. Every year in summer, they meet, and people keep track of who is there. Guest lists every year. Top politicians, royalty, corporate owners. Extreme security. No protocols."

"There is confirmation from a variety of these people that they were there."

"So, what do they talk about? Are they coordinated somehow after each meeting? How much influence do they have?"

"Well, given the extreme security, it's difficult to say. I am sure it's nothing, though. Why would those groups of people want to influence the world to suit their agendas, right?"

"Also note, anyone discussing this gets called a tin foil hat, or paranoid, or a conspiracy theorist who probably also believes in antivaxx reptilian....."

- Common-Wish-2227

Secret Climate Change

"The petroleum companies knew burning fossil fuels would lead to global climate change but hid the evidence of their own funded studies and did nothing to curb consumption, instead funded groups opposed to renewable, non-greenhouse gas generating energy to maximize shareholder value."

- 85_Draken

The Travels of Elvis Presley

"Elvis didn’t die in 1977. He was working with the government (DEA OR CIA? I can’t remember?). When he was compromised they had to fake his death."

"He actually moved to Argentina and lived the rest of his life down there."

"There were a lot of sightings. My favorite is when one of his house workers reported someone that looked just like him lying out by the pool at his own house the day after he died."

"It’s a fun theory that is pretty convincing the more you look into it."

- Affectionate-Win-788

Conspiracies All the Way Down

"People believe all the governments in the world have collaborated on keeping the shape of the Earth and our inability to visit the Moon a secret..."

- draculamilktoast

"But what about the turtle we are sitting on?"

- KAG25

"More importantly, what about the turtle THAT turtle is sitting on?"

- Hym3n

Intentionally Divisive

"That our governments are turning us all against each other to distract us from the blatant wealth manipulation, corrupt practices, nepotism, cronyism, among hundreds of other big issue things. Their plans working a treat and the people as a whole can't see what's happening and start working together against it."

"We are losing our privacy, our rights, and our sense of connection with one another. We drift away while they get more and more powerful. People hand away their rights like they're going to get them back and never question it when it's not."

"Our planet had to deal with another of the world power's attempts at control and that's the pandemic or should I say the reaction to it. I was always a believer it happened naturally but as time goes on it becomes more apparent it wasn't."

"We are bodies hanging from the roof being bled dry slowly but if this keeps up we aren't just f**ked like a world war or nuclear war, if we don't do anything we will lose whatever control we have and we will never get it back."

- Magic_Kushroom

From interesting and wowing to deeply troubling, there's truly no shortage of conspiracies and conspiracy theories out there for people to puzzle over and research.

The most troubling thing about them, honestly, has to be the stigma surrounding a person's interest in them. As soon as someone expresses interest in one of these theories, others are quick to discredit them.

A couple sitting in a movie theater
Felipe Bustillo/Unsplash

As Nicole Kidman wisely tells patrons of AMC movie theatres that we go to the movies to "laugh, to cry, to cry, to care."

"Because we need that. All of us."

And the movies that really make an impression on us are the ones that do all of the above as she described.

When characters are well-developed and the actors portraying them really connect with the audiences, they stay with us forever.

There's nothing more heartbreaking than seeing our favorite heroes–whether supernatural or based on actual, real people–suffer loss or meet their own untimely demise.

Curious to hear from moviegoers, Redditor CallyB0225 asked:

"What is the saddest movie scene ever?"

Don't underestimate the power of animated films.

Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow

"The Fox and the Hound when the old woman has to leave Todd in the game preserve to save him and her tears as she drives away without him."

– snortybeagle

"Also the scene where Todd gets out and she’s running through the woods with a lantern calling for him. Reminds me of losing my cat."

– aaron_hoff

Baby Mine, Don't You Cry

"When Dumbo's mom rocked him from behind her cage 😭"

– LimpCauliflower8579

"Baby mine, don't you cry Baby mine, dry your eyes Rest your head close to my heart Never to part, baby of mine."

"F'k. I had to take a little baby possum to get euthanized because its mama had been hit by a car and killed along with its siblings. It was awful - you could see some of the babies had survived the impact and tried to crawl off, only to be hit themselves. This little one was the only one left when I got there, but it was too injured to make it. It sounds so dumb but I sang a bit of this song to it while I held it on my lap on the way to the vet. I know it's anthropomorphizing them too much, but possums seem like such good mamas."

– lizardingloudly

Dinosaurs Grieve Too

"The first movie in the Land Before Time. Broke my heart. Still does."

– HeelerDot18

"Littlefoot mistaking his shadow for his mother."

“Mother? Mother!”

– justputonsomemusic

"That scene KILLS me because I know that exact feeling. My mother died when I was 12, and for a long time after she died, I would see someone who looked like her and have this cruel, crazy stab of hope that my mom wasn’t really gone."

– captcha_trampstamp

A Cub Grows Up

"Simba begging Mufasa to wake up. That tiny little 'help.'"

– mossadspydolphin

"get up....we gotta go home...."

– imthe1nonlyD

Remember The Dead

"The scene in Coco where Miguel is trying to get mama Coco to remember her father. My daughters and I all cried at the theater. Mama Coco reminded us so much of my grandmother. At that point we had lost 3 of my grandparents. 1 each year. My grandmother was all we had left. She died a few years after the movie came out. My daughter hasn't watched it since because she knows she will cry even harder."

– thiswilltakeamiracle

When a character has an epiphany, we're right there with them.

Unsatisfied Hero

"The 'I could have saved more' scene where Schindler has an emotional breakdown after the workers gave him a ring engraved with the quotation: 'Whoever saves one life saves the world entire' and was then comforted by the workers in the movie Schindler's List."

– SuvenPan

The Gift Meant For Someone Else

"Emma Thompson in her bedroom after she receives the Joni Mitchell CD for Christmas."

– khendron

"Just phenomenal acting. I can’t remember who said it, but there’s a quote that watching someone trying not to cry is somehow sadder than watching someone cry and it’s so true."

– prunellazzz

Parting is such sweet sorrow.

The Last Bedtime Story

"When the mom tucks her kids in and the old couple go to bed together in Titanic knowing they’re going to die."

– enlenar

"The mother and children are Irish, and in that scene she’s telling them an old Irish story about going to a land of eternal youth and beauty. The only way she could attempt to comfort them knowing what is to come."

"As a mother I couldn’t imagine making that decision. To spend our last moments in utter chaos fighting for our lives, or going back to the quiet of the cabin and dying as a family there. Gut wrenching."

– SylviaKasen

The Most Loyal Dog Ever

"Hachiko waiting for his friend to come back every day at the train station."

– 33-9

"Omg, I think that would be number 1 on my list, I don’t think I’ve ever cried harder than at the end of Hachi."

– OP

A Soldier Dies

"When Giovanni Ribisi’s character dies in Saving Private Ryan, after telling the story about pretending to be asleep when his mom checked in on him."

– howdysteve

"His whole story about his mom and his final line "...I don't know why I did that..." really hits me hard, and I always shoot my mom a sloppy, cheesy text immediately after the scene."

– duskywindows

Meeting His Maker

"In the Green Mile when John Coffey (Michael Clarke Duncan) gets executed. "Don't put me in the dark." Gets me every time..."

– Vivid-Voyage

"That was the first movie to make me sob, not get teary eyed, but painful sobbing."

"Also RIP Michael Clarke Duncan."

– shewy92

While we go through tissues blowing our noses and wiping away our tears (hopefully not in that order), "somehow, heartbreak feels good in a place like this."

Yes, Nicole Kidman. We love to ugly cry in movie theaters.

But we'll never look as stunning as you while doing so. ​

A man and woman naked and snuggling
Photo by Dainis Graveris

Sex is natural, sex is fun.

So sayeth the great George Micahel.

Spontaneous lovemaking leaves a lasting impression.

Or at least a great ten minutes.

Redditor hockeysmyh*e wanted to hear about all the times sex came as a surprise, so they asked:

"What is the most unexpected time you’ve ever had sex?"

One day in college... all it took...

Me on one escalator.

Him on another.

One wink.

Nerves

Kill Me Now Season 1 GIF by FriendsGiphy

"After what I thought was a horrible 1st date. She was on her phone literally the entire time. When we get to her house she says 'Wanna come inside?' Turns out, she was just nervous on the date."

earic23

Questions Answered

"I was a very young-looking 22-year-old volunteering at a film festival as community service for a reckless driving ticket."

"One of the filmmakers visiting from another country who was around 30 started talking to me and she kept asking me weird questions like what year I graduated high school and whether I liked certain 15-year-old music."

"I was like this chick is weird, but then she said do you live around here, we went back to my apt and ended up having sex. Afterward, I was like - why did you ask me all those weird questions? And she said, 'I was trying to figure out if you were old enough!'"

"We ended up hanging out the whole week and then she went back home and that was it. Good times."

kaspm

And Nothing Else...

"I was at a hotel in college with a bunch of other college kids and a bunch of us were in one room drinking. I had to go to the bathroom but someone was using the one where we were. I said I was going back to my room to use that one and also to get some more beer. A girl in the group asked if she could come with me. When I came out of the bathroom she was wearing one of my t-shirts. And nothing else. I did not go back to the party room with more beer."

Amesb34r

Right Then and There...

"I got late-night sushi with a friend. She treated me since I was going through a nasty breakup. After a few sakes, we began to head out. She grabbed me by the sleeve and pulled me into the bathroom. She began hard-core kissing me and we ended up having sex right then and there."

topherthepest

Gor For It

like a virgin madonna GIFGiphy

"Gondola lift going up a mountain in Switzerland. My wife and we’re backpacking for 21 days around Europe and unexpectedly found ourselves alone on the gondola. We just looked at each other, smiled, and went for it. Fantastic experience."

CBus-Eagle

That gondola must have had might strong cables!

New bucket list item.

Burn Off

So Excited Reaction GIF by OriginalsGiphy

"Against the side of my boyfriend’s house while his family ate dinner inside."

"He wanted to take me up to his room, his parents said no, so he said we were going for a walk instead. Burn off some energy. It was surprisingly great."

whitneywestmoreland

'Ayyyy'

"For the record, I'm the most oblivious person ever. But a friend of mine invited me to attend her yoga class with her. I didn't think about it at the time but she was giving me a lot of hands-on attention and help. We went back to her place afterward and walked and talked on a Greenway near her house."

"She said something along the lines of 'I'll tell you a secret if you tell me one' and I said some s**t about not believing in myself and she told me she was 'trying to get f**ked tonight.'"

"I didn't realize she meant by me but as a joke, I said 'Ayyyy' like I was Fonzy or something and put my arm around her. The next thing I know she's putting her tongue in my mouth, I realized that I'm brain dead, and things progressed from there."

slaughterpuss25

Pillow Fight

"I went over to a friend's house. She and I had been friends since elementary school and never took it further than that because we had no interest in it. Anywho, we were watching TV in the living room having a fun debate back and forth and she threw a pillow at me so I threw it back at her and it started a pillow fight, she grabbed me and tried to take the pillow from me."

"We were not extremely close to each other and we noticed it and looked at each other...i t then turned into sex in the living room, leading into her bedroom. Afterward, we laid in bed and talked for a while and then it continued for several years. Now we’re married with two kids."

Metalblacksheep

NOW!!

"When my wife and I were dating, she drove a friend out of town to see her husband, who was just completing boot camp, and I tagged along for the weekend. We spent that 1st night in the same room, with us in one bed and the friend in the other. I wasn't expecting anything, seeing as how we had someone 'THISCLOSE' to us, but after we thought the friend fell asleep, my wife started kissing and groping me."

"She said she wanted it, but I resisted. After a couple more minutes, she finally just flat-out said 'Do Me. Now.' It was the most unexpected, slowest, quietest, and hottest sex ever. The next day, the friend made a comment that she couldn't sleep because we were moving around too much. She knew."

cb0044

The Crush

Alicia Silverstone Flirting GIFGiphy

"In the car with a co-worker who was driving me home. I admitted to another co-worker that I had an extreme crush on this girl. What I didn't know was that she immediately told her about my crush."

"So when she offered to drive me home (I always walked, it was only a couple of miles) I thought she was just being nice and taking me home... lol."

Real_Bug

Clearly we all need to be reading the signs and signals.

We miss out on so much.