Interracial Couples Reveal The Biggest Cultural Adjustments They Overcame
Interracial Couples Reveal The Biggest Cultural Adjustments They Overcame
[rebelmouse-image 18351636 is_animated_gif=Cultural stereotypes, and the judgments that accompany them, still present challenges for interracial couples. But dating someone from another culture has its perks too - different food, family celebrations, holiday traditions - all help to enrich our relationships. It's not always easy, though, as people still like to judge.
jbrown3152 asked, Redditors in interracial relationships, what was the biggest cultural adjustment you had to make?
Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.
The Chinese ex was doing it right. Unopened and uneaten? Mine.
[rebelmouse-image 18351637 is_animated_gif=My ex-boyfriend of two years was Chinese, and I'm white (and Southern, while he'd lived most of his life in Chicago). We had some minor things like he would make fun of how much cheese I ate and I made fun of how much he learned to love sweet iced tea. But the one cultural norm we didn't even realize we didn't have in common was taking food home from special events. For white people, food left at the end of a wedding/event/banquet is for the host (whoever's paid for it) to dispose of/dispense how they like. In Chinese culture, mass to-go boxes are distributed and everyone takes home whatever they want. I remember being mortified at a wedding when my bf just snagged an entire, unopened box of cupcakes to take when we left. In my mind, he just stole cupcakes. What was so remarkable was that I thought he was being cheap and he thought I was being paranoid, and we never ever chalked it up to cultural norms. Learned this from a totally different (also Chinese) friend after we'd broken up.
Edit: I'm speaking of fancy or formal events specifically, not all get-togethers with food.
This seems like an easy adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351638 is_animated_gif=So. Many. Hugs.
Family is family is family.
[rebelmouse-image 18351639 is_animated_gif=One I can answer!
My partner is from Zimbabwe. I'm from Scotland.
The biggest culture shock by far is how every older woman is called mbuya (gran) and every older man sekuru (grandpa). From what I understand their language (Shona) doesn't seem to have a word for aunties, uncles or cousins: everyone is just your sibling, parent, grandparent or a stranger. Makes it a nightmare to work out what the 'real' relations are.
Saying "I'm full" is a no-no in many cultures, and there's always so much food.
[rebelmouse-image 18351642 is_animated_gif=Not a current relationship but a previous one. I'm white and he's Hispanic. Meeting his family was really when the cultural differences showed. His entire family was super welcoming, immediately I was included in everything and made to feel like part of the family, that was definitely not the norm in my other relationships.
I found out that even if I'm stuffed full if his mom or aunt offered me food, I better take it. To refuse for any reason was extremely rude.
Authentic Mexican food is amazing.
We did go to a Hispanic dance club together once and I was treated like trash by everyone present because of being white, but that was the only occasion of people disapproving.
We broke up because he's a terrible person, but I still miss his family.
Celebrating for no reason? Sounds like a great adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351643 is_animated_gif=My fiancée is black, I'm white/Asian. Everyone from her family is very loud but in a loving way, especially in public. So much laughing and clapping for no reason, I love it so much. My wasian family is very quiet and reserved and doesn't show much affection. Being in public and getting stared at is the biggest adjustment. Also the food. Anyone else love neckbone?
Well, this is different, and certainly an adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351644 is_animated_gif=I am dating a girl whose parents are from East Boston. They call pasta "macaroni" and red sauce/pasta sauce "gravy." WTF
Doesn't seem like much adjustment is needed here, everyone is really well-rounded.
[rebelmouse-image 18351645 is_animated_gif=Meeting her family: lots of hugs, the family is important, you always compliment how beautiful the mom is and eat all of her cooking, when the dad drinks then you must drink, anytime they invite you to an event then you drop everything and go or witness their wrath.
Her meeting my family: shoes come off the second you enter the house, be prepared to gossip with the mom, constantly receive a small sentence of wisdom from the dad.
I am Vietnamese and she is Venezuelan. Both families agree we would have beautiful children.
Edit: RIP inbox. y'all some amazing people: ;)
Mothers-in-law take a lot of adjusting.
[rebelmouse-image 18351647 is_animated_gif=White male married to a black woman here. We have been together since 1988 and have a 19 yo daughter.
I am not sure there were any real cultural adjustments. I have read about people in interracial relationships getting all kinds of blowback/disapproval but we've not experienced anything significant.
My MIL finds fault with virtually anything but that does not seem cultural though.
Tearing down cultural stereotypes is a necessary adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351648 is_animated_gif=My ex-boyfriend is Japanese. He and his family were very very proper, clean, and etiquette. The biggest thing was they were never really satisfied with his accomplishments. Every time he did something good they would always want more from him.
Edit: One thing I forgot to mention was that I'm Hispanic, and his family had some misconceived views on Hispanic/Latino people. The sister and dad thought I was going to be some sort of drug dealer or a gang member and were scared of me at first. His mom and brother thought I was going to be loud, good at dancing, and always say something in Spanish after every sentence. They were very interesting...
Learning your partner's native language shows immense dedication, and is a really noble adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351649 is_animated_gif=Learning Spanish. I married a Peruvian who speaks perfect English and so I have trouble remembering what I learn.
I like the sound of the wild Christmas.
[rebelmouse-image 18351651 is_animated_gif=My husband is Mexican and I am white. The biggest thing we genuinely notice and laugh about is how Christmas is handled.
His family - mass chaos, everyone opens presents all at the same time. There is literally trash and Christmas paper EVERYWHERE.
My family - slow, meticulous, everyone patiently waits their turn to open their gift. We legitimately have someone assigned to trash bag duty.
This happens far too often - skin color shouldn't define love.
[rebelmouse-image 18351653 is_animated_gif=It's weird getting racist side-eyes from people of the same race as me.
Whether it's interracial or sexuality, let's not judge others on how and whom they love.
[rebelmouse-image 18351654 is_animated_gif=My interracial relationship isn't an issue with most people. They normally just are disgusted because we're gay.
Hot take: visits are one thing, but having the whole family in a hospital room is really uncomfortable. It was for me.
[rebelmouse-image 18351655 is_animated_gif=I'm Hispanic, my husband is Caucasian. When someone in my family is sick, the whole family shows up. We all sit in the waiting room for a surgery, come by the house with food during a recovery. When his own father had a cardiac cath my husband didn't go with him even though he had the day off work. I went with his father and his mother and he thought it was so extra for me to go. His mentality is that I can't do anything if something goes wrong. He said if something did go wrong his mother would call him. In my family, it's a show of love, respect, and support to be at someone's sick bed, even for a routine medical procedure. His mother didn't find it strange, his sister didn't go either. It's just weird to me. When his grandma had a hip replaced he went to visit her in rehab only one time and she was there for two weeks. If it was my family, we would take shifts so she would have at least one visitor per day and one home-cooked meal.
Oh, white people...
[rebelmouse-image 18351656 is_animated_gif=Black man with a white ex here. I have plenty of these types of scenarios. My favorite is the white people who assumed we weren't together when we walked into a restaurant. My ex was absolutely incensed! I laughed because I've dealt with that ignorance on more than one occasion.
Parties for everything? Why not?!
[rebelmouse-image 18351658 is_animated_gif=White trash married into a Hispanic household.
Everything is different.
They throw parties for everything. High school graduation was a huge deal, I had to convince my parents to come because I needed a ride home afterward. His family was shocked.
We don't cook when people come over. Just buy some pizza. His mom might kill me if I throw a party without cooking a bunch of homemade food.
Sleepovers, family coming over? Then it's assumed they will stay the night. Totally threw me off. Our family barely visits and when they do it's for a few hours then they're gone.
Is someone pregnant? Awesome huge parties and lots of gifts. My family? That sucks better figure out what you're gonna do.
Kids party? Lots of games n food n cake and gifts. My family, oh cool here's a t-shirt I have work so I'm gonna leave now.
A family member needs help? They're family best go help. My side? The most you'll get is a 'that sucks' there's no helping each other.
Been about 6 years now and I'm still learning.
The concept of "on time" varies greatly from culture to culture.
[rebelmouse-image 18351659 is_animated_gif=Different understanding of time.
Edit: to be clear she is latina and I am white. Doesn't make me mad, it's just a difference in culture. It's an adjustment I have to make.
It takes a lot of courage to stand up to white supremacy. Sounds like the stepdad needs the adjustment.
[rebelmouse-image 18351660 is_animated_gif=I'm black and I'm currently dating a white guy. His stepdad is a white supremacist, so going to his house always feels a little awkward.
Expanding your taste in food is one of the best ways to experience other cultures.
[rebelmouse-image 18349417 is_animated_gif=When I'm in a relationship I tend to eat less Asian foods to accommodate their tastes. I'm Asian-American and grew up eating a variety of foods. It was hard to adjust in the beginning because the people I tend to date (primarily small-town White-Americans) have a limited food palette.
Right now my current S/O has a very wide range of palette which I'm super duper grateful for. We've eaten a large array of ethnic foods compared to my previous relationships, but just not Asian dishes yet lol. Mostly due to us not traveling out of the city, where it primarily dominated by Thai, to the suburbs where there different facets of Chinese cuisines.
It's fascinating that dancing never caught on as part of American culture. But it's never too late to try!
[rebelmouse-image 18351661 is_animated_gif=I'm a boring white American and my fiance is Puerto Rican. Everyone dances, and dances well, except for me of course.
People Describe The All-Time Worst Dates They've Ever Been On
Reddit user sweet_chick283 asked: 'What's the worst date you've ever been on?'
Finally going out on a date with the person you've been chatting with online is a very exciting yet nerve-wracking first step.
But when you finally meet the person with whom you've developed romantic chemistry online, one of two things can happen–Fireworks or bombs.
In other words, being face-to-face with a prospective love interest for the first time can either confirm your hopes or suspicions about the person whom you know very little about online.
Curious to hear nightmare stories about dating life, Redditor sweet_chick283 asked:
"What's the worst date you've ever been on?"
People and their obsession with their electronic devices is getting out of hand.
Mr. Invisible
"Sat for 15 minutes to hear him talk about himself, work and his future plans, and then as he asked me 'what about you?" his hand went to reach his phone and he starts scrolling. I can't stress this enough, his hand reaches his phone at the same time those words left his mouth. It felt to me like he already decided whatever I am going to say was going to be boring so might as well multitask as I talk."
– dracarysthemdown
Self-Incriminating Date
"Went on a date with a chick that took my phone and put a picture of her on my Snapchat, I got 20 messages almost instantly from chicks that knew her and told me to stay away. She was 2 months pregnant, didn’t tell me till my friends did. That was a wild date for sure. She was very upset."
– ThatBrenon131
The Salesperson
"Tinder date. She pulled out her Ipad and started introducing me various insurance plans she is selling."
– IndigoldWeM
"Oooooh god that's almost as bad as trying to recruit a first date into your MLM line..."
– OP
"I had a date that tried to sell me whole life insurance. She told me before the date to meet her at her office. It was downtown so I thought nothing of it. Then she walks me to her desk and tells me to sign some papers."
– Pissedtuna
Sometimes, dates turn out to be disastrous through no fault of participants.
Things Went Downhill
"I thought I would be a little more adventurous and suggest that we go skiing for a first date. At the time, I lived in the south where the closest ski mountain was 2.5 hours away and it was opening day. It became clear that we probably didn’t click on the drive up, but I figured we’d still have a fun day of skiing. On the first run, maybe 100 yards in, she falls hard and tears her acl, lcl, and mcl. It was a very long and awkward car ride back, and I ended up staying with her for several days after to help care for her since she lived alone and was new to the area. She was a very nice woman, but that was just a lot for a first date."
– houston_g
People were forced to make a run for it.
The Great Escape
"So many bad dates over the years. One of the worst was this guy I met on a dating site. We agreed to go to dinner at a nearby restaurant. Turned out his profile picture really was of himself but it was just a 'few' years old. BS! In person, he straight up looked like Santa Claus on vacation complete with the Hawaiian shirt. I was a little unhappy about that but it wasn’t the end of the world. I thought well maybe he is jolly and fun. That turned out to be a big NO."
"So we ordered dinner and he started talking about ex wife #1. She was a b*tch and crazy. Ex wife #2 was also a b*tch and crazy. Ex wife #3 was a psycho crazy b*tch from hell. He told me ex #3 hit him in the face with a frying pan. He seemed to enjoy my horrified reaction. That was, until I asked what he did he do to her to make her smack him upside the head with said frying pan. Personally, I thought it was an awful date and I couldn’t wait to go home. He ordered dessert. :/"
"mentioned getting home soon and he said We can discuss that later as he was paying for my meal and we were going to enjoy our time together. I waited for a few minutes and politely excused myself to the ladies room. He stood up and watched me go in and was watching me when I came back to the table. It was as if he knew I wanted to bolt out the door. I got my chance when he finally went to the men’s room. I handed the waitress money for my food plus tip and told her I was on a very bad date. I left the restaurant just before he came back from the men’s room. He saw me through the front windows and started screaming like a lunatic. I don’t know what he was saying but I ran to my car!"
– SassyDiva13
Tasks First, Eat Later
"Went out with a guy from POF who lived an hour away from me. (I live in the sticks so this is normal.) I texted him to let him know I was on my way and this dipsh*t proceeded to text me every few minutes to ask me if I was still coming. So much so that I finally had to call him and tell him to stop because I can't text and drive at the same time. In hindsight, I should have turned around and went home right then."
"Finally I get to the place we were meeting. It was a store parking lot. Since we were meeting there and going somewhere else right away, I texted him and said I was there, where are you and he replies insisting I come into the store. He absolutely would NOT come outside to meet me. So I had to spend the first hour of this date following him around an auto parts store while he pawed through every display and bin, not talking to me very much at all."
"Finally he was ready to leave the store and I thought we were going to eat, as we had originally planned. I was starving but he said no, I gotta go return my work uniforms to my old job first. Uhh, okay I guess."
"So we drove in his car to this factory where he parks and says hop out so I can lock my car up. It was cold and rainy so of course he expected me to stand out in it? After like 15 minutes I was like f'k this and I went in the lobby of this place to get out of the rain. For some reason it took this guy 45 more minutes to return his uniforms so I was glad I went into the building to get warm. But apparently this was a huge no-no to him because when he came back out from wherever he went to return this stuff he glared at me like I just dropped trou and took a sh*t in his lap and asked me why I didn't just wait outside. In the cold rain. For almost an hour."
"At last he decided it was time to go to the restaurant. I sat there trying to keep a poker face while he talked to the waitress like he was addressing a toddler, messily stuffed his face and chewed with his mouth open wide and kept glancing around every 30 seconds like he was scared someone was going to see him out with a woman in public."
"Plus he kept asking me invasive and crude sex questions the whole time too. Lovely."
"I quickly inhaled a salad and managed to pay for it at the front without him seeing me, I told him I needed to go to the little girl's room and bounced. Luckily this restaurant was across the highway from the store where I had left my car so I crossed it real quick and blocked him everywhere before I even got the car warmed up."
"I'll betcha a million bucks and a house salad that a**hole was married."
– produkt921
It's unfortunate that people on dating apps aren't always forthright about themselves.
Older Woman
"I wouldn’t say it was the worst but it was the most interesting. Met a lady on a dating app. A Beautiful woman who claimed to be 38 which is my age. I suspected through the pictures she might be in her early 40s. Her profile said she had 3 kids. We talked and she seemed cool. We then met for dinner a week into talking. I could tell she was older but looked younger than she should because of Botox. Within 15 minutes she said she had to tell me the truth because she really likes me. She does not have 3 kids but 6! She is not 38 but 48!"
– bobismymother
The Date That Wasn't A Date But Actually Was A Date
"I didn't even know it was a date."
"Girl I worked with was talking up a breakfast place in a nearby town, and I was like 'that sounds great, let's go this weekend!'"
"We went, I had a great time, the pancakes were amazing, and I had fun hanging out with a work friend outside of work. I thought she had a good time too, she was laughing and fully engaged with the conversation just like normal."
"Like three weeks later, I was talking to another coworker when it all came out that she'd been telling people we went on a terrible date, how I didn't even make a move or flirt or do anything that guys she goes on dates with normally do, and how I even talked about a date with another girl at one point."
"I was flabbergasted, my fat a** genuinely thought we were just a couple of friends getting pancakes."
– SadlyReturndRS
If you're no longer in the dating pool because you found your person, congrats.
There's no doubt you have kissed some frogs along the way to finding true love.
Because if it weren't for all those "horrible dates," you might not be able to appreciate what you've got when the right person comes along.
A bad@ss is defined as:
"a tough, uncompromising, or intimidating person."
The term is attributed to North America, dating back to 1809. But use remained fairly minimal throughout the 19th and 20th centuries.
The term really took off at the beginning of the 21st century and continued a swift upward trajectory until the present.
Even though the widespread use of the term is relatively recent, the attitude and attributes of a bad@ss goes back to the beginning of human existence.
Reddit user BlackManBatmann asked:
"Who is the most bad@ss person to have ever lived?"
Grandparents
"My Grandpa Liberatus."
"Was working solo on his farm in the 1950’s, when both hands were sucked into an auger slicing them up right to the shoulders. Was able to kick the controls to reverse the blades and get himself out, then drove himself in a grainery truck 45 minutes to the hospital, steering and shifting gears with his knees."
"Doctors were able to save one arm above the elbow but none of the other."
"Still worked another 40 years with hooks for arms, fathered 9 children, 6 after his accident and harvested 1000 acres on a hundred year old family farm."
"Smoked like a chimney, drank like a fish, ate red meat 3 times a day, passed away in his sleep 2 days before his 99th birthday."
"He was a hard man, but absolutely devoted to his family and was a great Grandfather to over 20 grandkids. He taught me about resiliency, resourcefulness and mental toughness."
"Every grandkid, on their first birthday, got a rocking horse that he built in his workshop using hand tools that he built custom attachments for his prosthetics."
"I still have mine, from 56 years ago, as a reminder of him when times are tough."
"Grandma was named Elspeth and was a formidable woman in her own right. Raised a family of 11 in a two room farmhouse they lived in until the early 1960’s."
"She outlived Liberatus by 4 years and was always canning and preserving food. When we finally started clearing out their house after her death we found in excess of 10,000 jars of pickled and preserved food n her cellar."
"They were hard people, they had to be, but they were also in love right to the end."
"Married for almost 77 years I still remember them in the living room watching Hockey Night in Canada, holding hands on the couch. His arm around her, her gripping one of his hooks."
~ LOUDCO-HD
Giles Corey
"Giles 'more weight' Corey was pretty badass."
"Refused to testify at the Salem witch trials, so they 'pressed' him."
"They piled rocks on top of him as torture to force him to testify that his wife was a witch. They piled rock after rock on top of him."
"His last words were 'more weight', then he died."
~ epicmoe
Rotmistrz Witold Pilecki
"Rotmistrz Witold Pilecki."
"He purposely made himself be caught and thrown into Nazi death camp in Auschwitz to infiltrate it and organize underground resistance and do general recon."
"He then escaped with another prisoner to fight in Warsaw uprising."
~ IloveZaki
"Not just that, but immediately following the Warsaw Uprising, he was thrown into a German POW camp."
"After the war, he returned to his homeland of Poland, even with the knowledge he would likely be killed by the Polish Communist party for being loyal to the government-in-exile and he was in 1948."
"He had also co-founded the Polish Resistance."
~ designing-cats
Joe Medicine Crow
"Joe Medicine Crow, the last Warchief of the Crow."
"He completed all the ritual rights to become Warchief while fighting in WWII."
"Which included taking an enemies weapon, touching an enemy without killing him, leading a war party and stealing an enemies horse—he stole 50 from the SS."
"The war party came naturally and he got the disarm and the touch without killing at the same time but the horses was going to be challenging."
"They came across some SS holed up in a barn. They surrounded the barn and were waiting for dawn to attack, Joe convinced his CO to let him go and release the horses because they don't deserve to die."
"He snuck past the guard and opened up the whole corral and got onto a horse bareback and rode off with 50 horses while chanting a Crow war song. Meanwhile the Americans are mowing the platoon of SS down as they come out and try to stop Joe from riding off with their horses."
"The dude was a straight up f**king gangster."
~ RIPnts
Desmond Doss
"Private Desmond Doss (Hacksaw Ridge is the movie about his life)."
"He refused to use a gun but carried 75 men to safety including two of the wounded Japanese soldiers on the other side & used his medical knowledge to save their lives."
"He is the only conscientious objector to be awarded the Medal of Honor as awarded by President Harry S. Truman."
~ Redditor
"Hacksaw Ridge is missing a neat fact about him."
"At that battle he was wounded (I think 6 times but I'm not positive) but it was left out of the movie because it was felt to be too unbelievable."
~ Supraman83
Mary Vincent
"Mary Vincent."
"She had her arms amputated a serial killer, was left for dead in a drainage pipe, and somehow got herself to safety and survived."
"She was able to testify, but 14 years was the maximum penalty.
"She worked to get him put on death row after he was released early for good behavior and killed a mother of three in 1998."
~ kittengoesrawr
"She couldn’t afford to buy high-end prosthetic arms, so she created her own using parts from refrigerators and stereo systems, and she taught herself to draw and paint using her inventions."
"A depraved killer cut off her arms, and not only did he only get eight years, but the state couldn't even be bothered to pay for her prosthetic arms."
~ MrDownhillRacer
Galvarino
"Galvarino."
"He was a Mapuche warrior whose hands were amputated by Spanish conquistadors."
"His response?"
"He rigged blades to his wrist stumps and led a rebellion against the Spanish."
~ DontBuyAHorse
Vasily Aleksandrovich Arkhipov
"Vasily Arkhipov, the man who saved the world."
"He was a Soviet naval commander (brigade chief of staff) during the Cuban missile crisis who refused to launch a nuclear weapon.
"The ship he was on required three officers to be in agreement to fire the weapon, and only Arkhipov was against it, despite the potential career and personal repercussions."
"It's possibly apocryphal, but it's said that he swallowed his key so the weapon couldn't be fired unless he was cut open."
"Stanislav Petrov also saved the world from nuclear war in the 80's, and that should never be forgotten, but I'd argue that the stakes were higher for Arkhipov and the threat of nuclear war was much, much more imminent in the midst of a pissing battle between the Kennedy's and Khrushchev."
~ designing-cats
Raul Perez "Roy" Benavidez
"Master Sergeant Roy Benavidez, an Indigenous Yaqui and Mexican member of the Army Special Forces."
"On May 2, 1968, a 12-man Special Forces patrol with nine Montagnard (Indigenous Vietnamese) tribesmen, was surrounded by a North Vietnamese Army (NVA) infantry battalion of about 1,000 men."
"Benavidez heard the radio appeal for help and boarded a helicopter to respond. Armed only with a knife, he jumped from the helicopter carrying his medical bag and ran to help the trapped patrol."
"According to his Medal of Honor commendation, Benavidez 'distinguished himself by a series of daring and extremely valorous actions and because of his gallant choice to join voluntarily his comrades who were in critical straits, to expose himself constantly to withering enemy fire, and his refusal to be stopped despite numerous severe wounds, saved the lives of at least eight men'."
"During his Medal of Honor ceremony in 1981, President Ronald Reagan told the press, 'If the story of his heroism were a movie script, you would not believe it'."
"At one point in the battle an NVA soldier accosted him and stabbed him with his bayonet. Benavidez pulled it out, drew his own knife, killed him and kept going, leaving his knife in the NVA soldier's body."
"He later killed two more NVA soldiers with an AK-47 while providing cover fire for the people boarding the helicopter."
"After the battle, he was evacuated to the base camp, examined, and thought to be dead. As he was placed in a body bag among the other dead in body bags, he was suddenly recognized by a friend who called for help."
"A doctor came and examined him but believed Benavidez was dead. The doctor was about to zip up the body bag when Benavidez managed to spit in his face to show that he was alive."
"Benavidez had a total of 37 separate bullet, bayonet, and shrapnel wounds from the six-hour fight with the enemy battalion."
~ ComesInAnOldBox
But, there's more...
"His Medal of Honor isn’t even the craziest part. Let’s talk about his career before that."
"In 1965 he stepped on a landmine, and doctors said he would never walk again. He was so upset by this diagnosis that against doctors orders he secretly got up in the middle of the night and rehabilitated himself."
"Benavidez would crawl using his elbows and chin to a wall near his bedside and (with the encouragement of his fellow patients, many of whom were permanently paralyzed and/or missing limbs) he would prop himself against the wall and attempt to lift himself unaided, starting by wiggling his toes, then his feet, and then eventually (after several months of excruciating practice that, by his own admission, often left him in tears) pushing himself up the wall with his ankles and legs."
"After over a year of hospitalization, Benavidez walked out of the hospital in July 1966, with his wife at his side."
~ iamspartacus5339
Benavidez served in the Texas Army National Guard beginning in 1952 at age 17 during the Korean War until 1955 when he enlisted in active duty Army where he served until retiring in 1976 at age 41.
In retirement, Benavidez became a public speaker, volunteered for youth organizations and wrote three autobiographies: The Three Wars of Roy Benavidez, The Last Medal of Honor and Medal of Honor: A Vietnam Warrior's Story.
He died on November 29, 1998, at the age of 63. Master Sergeant Roy Benavidez was buried with full military honors at Fort Sam Houston National Cemetery.
There are some definite bad@sses in this list.
Who would you add?
The Dumbest Things The TSA Has Given Passengers A Hard Time About
The United States Department of Homeland Security was created November 25, 2002 in response to the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. Some existing agencies were transferred to the jurisdiction of the newly created cabinet post.
Among the agencies moved to Homeland Security were Customs and Border Protection, Federal Emergency Management Agency, United States Secret Service and the United States Coast Guard.
Some agencies were created to address new security measures then placed under Homeland Security. Among the new agencies created post 9/11 was the Transportation Security Administration (TSA).
TSA was created on November 19, 2001, to "improve airport security procedures and consolidate air travel security under a dedicated federal administrative law enforcement agency." TSA handles security for transportation systems within and connecting to the United States.
For most people, their interaction with TSA is at the airport. Those interactions aren't always pleasant for travelers.
Reddit user B2utyyo asked:
"What's the stupidest reasons the TSA gave you a hard time?"
Medication
"My Humira."
"I have a bag with an ice pack since I'm on Humira to treat an auto immune disease."
"Taking the caps off primes the injection. Each pen costs 500$ each. They uncapped all 8 of them."
"I raised a stink. Because I couldn't travel without this and then my doctor raised a stink when I called him for an emergency script."
"They were even in a special bag made for TSA in mind with all the drug info."
"Silver lining was I was able to file a claim and they were found negligent."
"They are not supposed to mess with medication."
~ Faedan
Clothing
"They said my shirt was a jacket."
"I kept telling her it was a blouse and all I had was a bra underneath and wasn’t going to take it off."
"After this exchange 4 times she finally let me through."
~ Phylace
Baby Supplies
"I brought formula through TSA for my 6 month old and they told me I had to dump it or consent to a full body pat down, which was conducted behind a sheet for privacy."
"I didn't have the money for more formula. I consented to the pat down."
~ Risky_Bizniss
"Every time we actually did fly with pumped milk or premade formula, they had to go stick each and every item in our diaper bag one at a time into their magic detector box."
~ jkster107
Wounds
"Dude they just waved a whole f*cking family through, then proceeded to aggressively fondle my balls and manhandle a bandaged injury while harassing me for not having a f*ckton of luggage."
"F*ck the TSA."
~ LurkerOrHydralisk
Wounds
"Had 14 stitches on my neck from a dog bite, 9 on one side, 5 on the other. Dog closed his jaws so both upper and lower teeth got me."
"TSA agent: 'it’s time to take off your Halloween makeup' and actually handed me an antibacterial wipe then made to pull off one of the bandaids."
"It was March? I don’t even know where to start."
"I like to think I’m fairly quick on my feet but my brain absolutely ground to a halt while she stared at me with the most misplaced smug expression I’ve ever seen."
"I slapped her hand away when she reached for my neck, honestly I think that reaction was a product of how completely offline my brain was because obviously that was not the ideal response."
"Anyway she wigged out, I got pulled out of line and dumped in a room for about an hour before the supervisor got there. I am not terribly proud of how I acted, but it was a less than an hour domestic flight and my grandmother was actively dying in the hospital."
"I let loose with applicable pent up things I never said to certain family members during COVID, which is why I’m not proud of it because some of what I said was particularly nasty."
"But when that woman reached for my neck I just about saw red—that was beyond comprehension."
"The supervisor let me go and had someone drive me on a cart to the gate so I made it with minutes to spare. He also apologized, which I appreciated."
~ goose_theslayer
Organic Matter
"Got flagged for organic material."
"It was a funerary urn."
"They asked me to open it."
"I refused."
"Only time I have ever made a stink in my life, supervisor finally let me go."
~ Cw2e
Sarcasm Service?
"I got like four sarcastic answers in a row trying to figure out which line to join (pre-check or regular)."
"Both lines backed up past the regular start, so there was no signs clearly visible, but there was an agent nearby."
"I asked casually which was pre-check, and he said 'if you don't know what pre-check is, then you don't belong in that line'."
"When I clarified I knew what it was and just couldn't tell which, he said 'you don't think it's the one that's probably moving faster?'."
"When I pointed out that neither was moving especially quickly, he said 'Well I guess it doesn't really matter then, does it?'."
"When I asked if there was a separate area for pre-check at a different spot, he said 'if there was, don't you think everyone would go there?'."
"Like guy I don't want VIP treatment, I just want to know what f**king line to stand in."
~ Art--Vandelay--
TSA Approved
"A small pair of scissors/hair trimmers, still in factory packaging, clearly marked TSA approved."
~ EverLastingSquint
Knife? No Problem
"I was coming back from a trade show and forgot I put one of those snap blade box cutters in by back pack."
"Went through X-ray, no problem and I only realized I had it once on the plane."
"Hair gel that came in a 120 ml tube that was well over 50% used? 'Come with me sir'."
~ ShoulderPossible9759
"The TSA fails 95% of undercover operations run against them, sneaking in knives, fake guns, fake bombs, etc..."
"But god forbid you don’t take your iPad out of your book bag."
~ _TheNorseman_
Mistaken Identity
"My uncle and father have almost comically common last names."
"Last time they visited the US they were stopped and held because there was a warrant for someone with my uncle’s name."
"Only problem, my uncle was nine inches shorter and thirty years older than the suspect."
~ probablynotaskrull
"This happened to my little cousin!"
"He too has an extremely common first and last name, and was held at the airport by security for being on the no fly list and having a warrant."
"Notice how I said 'little' cousin?"
"Yeah, that’s because he was a six year old boy; they were looking for a grown man!"
~ throwfaraway212718
Medical Equipment
"Wheelchair cushion (on which I was sitting, bc paraplegic)."
"TSA agent: 'That could be anything! We need to open it up!'.”
"Me: 'Sure. Put that in writing and also give me a letter guaranteeing that a replacement cushion (custom, costs $6k) will be waiting at the gate'.”
"TSA agent: 'oh, yeah, well, go on then'.”
"People worry about the airlines but the real obstacle if you’re disabled and use any equipment is TSA agents."
"I think they get paid to be their worst selves."
~ Pretend-Panda
"My CPAP is often chosen for extended testing."
"I think it was Chicago where two separate TSA agents were alternately yelling at me, one that I had to stay there while they tested my CPAP, and one that I couldn't stay there and had to leave the security area."
~ hymie0
"Several years back, I was flying with an orthopedic boot because I broke my foot a few weeks before. Nashville TSA was yelling at me and flipping out about it."
"I got yelled at about asking to sit down to take the boot off, yelled at for holding up the line because I needed to take it off, yelled at while it was off demanding to know why I would need it in the first place, yelled at to stop lying when I said I broke my foot, then yelled at one final time over how I was holding up the line needing to put it back on."
"Meanwhile, they were sending the boot itself through the scanner multiple times."
"Oakland TSA just glanced at the boot and waved me through. Quite a stark contrast."
~ HeyFiddleFiddle
Since the agency's creation they've come under scrutiny for inconsistencies and repeated failures during surprise testing.
What's your TSA horror story?
People Explain Which Things From Their Childhood No Longer Exist Today
When I was a little girl, I adored the American Girl books. These were books about girls in different historical periods of time in America. They weren't just books, however. There was a lot of American Girl merchandise, including dolls.
I adored the doll I had of Felicity Merriman, my favorite American Girl. A few years ago, I started reading the American Girl books to my cousin. She had her own favorite character, Samantha, and I decided it would be nice to get her a Samantha doll for her birthday. I went to order one only to find out they had archived the dolls of the four original American Girls, including Felicity and Samantha.
Eventually, new versions of the dolls were re-released, but they looked completely different from the characters from the books, which the original dolls captured. These dolls are just one thing that existed in my childhood that no longer exists.
I'm not the only one who has experienced these. Redditors have identified plenty of things from their childhood that no longer exist and are eager to share.
It all started when Redditor lil-gatorwrangler asked:
"What is something from your childhood that no longer exists now?"
Breakfast Gifts
"Cool spoons from cereal boxes!!! i miss the color changing and straw ones."
– pompomcinnamon
"Nothing like only buying a box of cereal because of the cool lil gift inside. 🥹"
– lil-gatorwrangler
"This reminds me I haven't seen my Taz spoon in a while. It makes Taz noises when you dip it in milk."
– TransformerTanooki
Family Phones
"Yelling “SOMEBODY GET THE PHONE.”
– Jfonzy
"Adjacent: “Get off the internet! I have to make a phone call!”"
– cold_dry_hands
"The ring tone was......the phone."
– DEADFLY6
Slime!
"Nickelodeon game shows. I miss Legends of the Hidden Temple and Guts."
– ShawshankException
"Every time I have to take a headrest out and put it back in my car seat, I pretend I am completing a mission from LotHT."
– ReineDePlatine
Ah, The Book Fairs
"Do you remember filling out book orders when it was time for your school's book fair? :'("
– sn0wballa
"Omg yes!!! And just say dreaming about all the books I could have, if I could afford it lol."
– FlannelPajamas123
"Oh my god the happiest days of my school year."
– clover219
Cell Phone Plans
"I remember when cell phones were newish and scheduling your calls to after 7 on weekdays and anytime on weekends because nights and weekends were free and didn't count toward your monthly allotment of minutes. You also only had a limited amount of texts per month included in your plan."
–cartertucker
The Old Food Options
"Wendy's salad bar."
– SirBlack_
"Wendy’s 4 for $4. Rip 🥲"
– lil-gatorwrangler
Toy Stores
"KB toys."
– AcademicSavings634
"It always felt so cramped and jam packed full of stuff that every time you went you felt like an explorer."
– MrMojoFomo
"I worked at KB Toys throughout college. Can confirm that cramming stuff in there was a corporate policy, maybe for exactly this reason."
"Had to be careful going exploring though— more than once I found a dirty diaper someone had hidden behind a bunch of Barbies. I feel like everyone should work retail for at least a little while, so they can get a taste for what monsters people really are."
– Engelbettie
"Toys-R-Us. I miss that place. I remember my dad taking me and I’d just wonder through the aisles amazed at all the toys. I got one of my childhood favorite Barbie dream houses there."
– FrostQueen05
A Thousand Words
"Photo Albums. My mother has been cataloging some of the old photos she never got around to putting in albums recently. It is a different experience than looking through someone's phone at curated pictures. You would get the pictures back and 90% of them would go in the album. No editing, no my hair looks like crap. You would find photos of yourself years later that you never knew existed. When your grandparents die and you start looking through albums for their memorial and can reminisce. It is so nice."
– HighFiveYourFace
Christmas Was Never The Same
"I recall hearing about a concept mentioned in movies known as a 'Christmas bonus.'"
– mockhouse
"I actually worked at a place where I got to see the idea of a Christmas bonus die."
"They had, for years, given out a Christmas bonus the 2nd week of December that was a cash bonus equivalent to about 1 week's pay. It wasn't huge but it was just that little extra for people already living paycheck to paycheck to have something to buy the wife and kids some Christmas presents."
"Then one year some dude in management came up with this really awesome idea: Instead of giving each employee a couple hundred dollars in cash we should totally give them a frozen turkey."
"It will be great! everyone needs a frozen turkey for Christmas dinner and we can order a whole semi truck trailer full of of them for a great bulk discount so they only cost like $20 each... employees win and we save money!"
"So that is what the company did."
"Only they did't tell anyone that was what was going to happen until the truck backed into the loading dock and happy managers started handing out frozen chunks of discount birds to people who had been budgeting their entire Christmas shopping on getting the cash instead."
"Christmas morning the owner of the company woke up to find hundreds of rotting turkeys on their front lawn."
"We never got a Christmas bonus again at that company - cash or cold turkey."
– varthalon
MY Personal Info
"Privacy. Mostly in the sense that we didn’t have big Meta mining our data/location/listening."
– ilike2makemoney
Weekend Mornings
"Saturday morning cartoons. Nothing beat the joy of waking up early in Saturday morning to watch five hours of your favorite cartoons, most of which were only on at that time on that day."
– nijaxi4567
"I know what you mean. There are cartoons on Saturday morning but with cable and YouTube and streaming and because those run 24-7, it isn’t an event."
"Few things beat running downstairs, pouring yourself a huge bowl of sugary cereal, and flipping on a full hour of Ninja Turtles, Garfield, Ghostbusters, and topping it off with Saved By the Bell all while your parents slept in."
– vmikey
Movie Night
"Blockbuster movie rental."
– lordharliquin
"Oh. My favorite thing we used to do is we would go to the video store and blindfold one of us and pick out a movie and just watch something random. It was so fun fun!"
– darforce
"I WAS LOOKING FOR THIS!! Those are some of the best memories from my childhood! So much better than Netflix!"
– betaflc
No Streaming
"Yelling "IT'S OOOOOOOON" as your siblings hurtled themselves back into the living room and across the couch after the ad break. That 'will I make it' few minutes of just not knowing if you had time to both pee and ALSO get kitchen snacks, were andrenaline-inducing."
– wildgoats2345
That was me and my brother as we watched Avatar: The Last Airbender. Sometimes, I really miss those days!
People's Wildest 'WTF Is Wrong With You?' Experiences