People Break Down The Most Embarrassing Phase They Ever Went Through
Reddit user SurfinRay12 asked: 'What’s an embarrassing phase you went through?'
Growing up was full of learning opportunities and expressing ourselves, but some of those phases were more successful than others.
Some of them were so embarrassing or cringey, it's almost impressive.
Redditor SurfinRay12 asked:
"What's an embarrassing phase you went through?"
The Favorite Accessory Phase
"In high school, I would regularly wear a top hat to school because I thought it made me look cool and edgy."
- SadCicada
The Choosing a Style Phase
"I used to wear an old, thrifted black trench coat and fake Birkenstocks to school in the 90s with a knitted beret."
"I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be goth or grunge. But I was mostly supporting myself and definitely didn’t have the money to buy more than a few pieces of clothing a year anyway."
- TheLakeWitch
The Enlightened Phase
"I went through the edgy intellectual phase as a teenager because I read one book on philosophy and was therefore an enlightened genius."
- MagnificentExample
"I bet it was Nietzsche, lol (laughing out loud)."
- ShiroKuroKage
"It was. I felt like I had gained access to secret elder lore that no 15-year-old should possess."
"Thankfully I kept most of my thoughts to myself, and that there was an even more insufferable guy in my year because otherwise I would have been one of the cringiest people in the school."
- MagnificentExample
The Nihilism Phase
"Reading Kurt Vonnegut in high school started that phase for me. That idea that everything is bulls**t along with my parents going through a nasty divorce really turned me off to basically everything."
"I didn't take the SAT, didn't go to college. Never wanted to work in an office. Now that I'm 31, it's definitely changed and I would love an office job, but I still think everything is bulls**t."
- paperpens
The Fake Accent Phase
"I spoke in a fake British accent for a whole month at school."
- buckyhermit
"In middle school, I brought a dry-erase board to school and communicated by writing on it instead of talking for literally no reason at all."
- Zekumi
The Poser Phase
"My ninth and tenth-grade years."
"Black leather motorcycle jacket heavily customized with spikes, leopard print fabric, band patches, and stripes made with white-out. Black jeans sewn tight with more band patches. Black band shirts with sleeves and collar ripped off. 14-inch Doc Martens boots. Studded, bondage, and/or bullet belts placed loosely around the waist."
"And I'm deaf and almost never attended a concert. What a f**king poser."
- schwarzes__loch
The Unique Typing Phase
"I ussseedddd to typeee like thisss."
- scarr3d_angel
"Lol (laughing out loud) I Used To Type Like This !"
- h*eforspaghettios
"I Know Someone Who Uses To Type Like This Too And I Started Doing It Back To Her And Found It Can Become Strangely Addictive Lol."
- anderoogig
"I Used To Talk Like This Too But It Just Looks Like I'm Writing A Book Title."
- imnotnocturnal
"i u s e d t o t h i n k t y p i n g l i k e t h i s w a s c o o l"
- pxstel_flower
The Name-Changing Phase
"That time at 16 when I wanted to change my name to Shampajne."
- PrimCrow
"What a Tragedeigh."
- Brodojour
The Celebrity Connection Phase
"During an 'introductions game' on the first day of second grade (six or seven years old), I told the entire class that Amanda Bynes was my step-sister."
"I then kept up the charade for the school year. One kid even asked for an autograph and I gave him a piece of notebook paper with her name written down in my baby cursive handwriting."
- sleepyselenophile
"I once told a girl in my class that Melissa Joan Hart was my stepsister, and the girl gave me a letter to give to Melissa that said how much she loved her and her show. That's crazy how similar our stories are."
- LepreConArtist
The Emotion-free Phase
"'Emotions are weak and useless. I have no emotions, I'm a logical robot.'"
"Sad girl. Very sad. Emotional unavailability is nothing to be proud of. I'm happy I grew past it."
- Wafael
"Oh my god, I went through that phase, too. I actually recently found my Fictionpress account from 2005, where I described myself as a 'prototypical human' who was 'missing the emotions of sadness and love.' Not really something to brag about, is it?"
- ostentia
The Oh So Classy Phase
"In junior high, I went to Chess King and bought a black nylon button-down shirt with a red Japanese sun cheaply printed on the back and red Japanese characters down the front. It had a big floppy collar and glossy black buttons."
"I wore that s**t to school with the top three buttons unbuttoned. A 13-year-old kid in a rural New England town in 1986 wearing a cheap, shiny disco shirt that's at least eight years out of fashion tucked into his Tuffskin jeans without a belt. Pure class at recess."
- hiro111
The Country Pride Phase
"After I graduated from boot camp in the Navy and finished A-School in Florida, I went home on leave and wore my dress blues to IHOP when I went to dinner with my family."
"This was back when the Military was glamorized, so I considered it celebrity status. I was young and it was the pinnacle of achievement for me and wanted to show it off. And I figured I had the right to because I earned it."
"Now, I cringe every time I think back to when I did that."
- LaughableEgo740
The Tough Breakups Phase
"Crying over dudes who treated me like garbage. Embarrassing."
- Proper-Bid-9732
The Book Series Phase
"I read 'Warrior Cats' religiously in sixth grade, hissed at people when I was mad, and insisted on going by 'Scourge.'"
- Noimnotareddituser
"Dude, I f**king LOVED that series in middle school! I never did anything like that but godd**n did that series have me hooked! Ironically though... I'm a dog person, and allergic to cats."
- Xavak_Stormbringer
The Random Words Phase
"I have a thing where I pick up words and just use them a lot for no good reason and I can't help it. Ever. It happens pretty automatically."
"The worst one I had was Ahoy. Said Ahoy instead of hi and a lot of other things I wish to forget."
"Currently, it's Goofy, which arguably is a lot better than saying Ahoy to everything."
- Possessed_potato
A lot of these were really cringey, mostly because we could see ourselves doing some of the same things when we were younger.
At least we can say that we grew past these things, and now we can look back and laugh.
People Divulge The Most Embarrassing Thing They've Ever Done In Front Of Their Crush
We've all done some embarrassing things, some that are so embarrassing, they actually keep us up at night.
But the worst kind of embarrassment has to be the kind that happens in front of a crush. While you're already worrying about whether or not they like you, and you're hoping to impress them, you somehow manage to do the exact opposite.
Redditor nei7jc asked:
"What is the most embarrassing thing you did in front of your crush?"
Quite the Turn of Events
"I crashed my motorcycle in front of her and her new boyfriend… She came with me to the hospital. I won."
- Randomhero360
Word Choice
"We were at a writers' conference. I spent a good long time telling them about some controversy surrounding the use of pseudonyms in a writing contest. I was pretty proud of how well I stated both sides, as well as my fairly well-researched thoughts on the matter. They didn’t add much, but I could tell they were interested."
"About fifteen minutes later, I realized that every (single) time I’d meant to say 'pseudonym,' I’d said 'surname' instead. Never talked to them again. Thirty years ago and it still hurts."
- Preposterous_punk
Second-Hand Embarrassment
"I had a credit card declined..."
- Keithninety
The Accidental Text
"I accidentally sent her a message about her which was supposed to go to my best friend."
"Thanks to my stupidity, she is now my girlfriend."
- Ninjagator
Drowning in Love
"I almost drowned in five feet of water. We're getting married this year, lol (laughing out loud)."
"It was an accident due to my friend's landlord not taking care of the property properly. It was an above-ground pool. I was lightly leaning on the railing."
"I was trying to do my best 'I'm just a chill, normal dude who is definitely not super nervous in front of this very attractive person' pose. Then the railing snapped, and I fell backward, hit my head on the wooden part of the pool as I fell according to others. The railing didn't fully detach and my ankle got caught in the bars. I was hanging upside down, head and torso completely submerged."
"My beautiful, wonderful, strong fiancé jumped in, lifted me out, and got all the inhaled water out (luckily wasn't a whole lot). She literally saved my life. I luckily only sustained a mild concussion and sprained ankle, in exchange for an amazing human being I get to call my love for the rest of my life."
- Gaymerlad
Awkward First Kisses
"I went in for a kiss, missed the mouth, and kissed his jacket collar. Panicked, laughed, stuttered an incomprehensible 'sorry,' laughed again, and ran away as if I was chased by a f**king velociraptor."
"I was 14 back then, meaning that it basically happened in the stone age, so we're cool."
- Leocut78
FriYaY
"Throwing my fist in the air and weakly saying, 'Yay,' when a dude told me, 'At least it’s Friday.'"
- ddensity9009
All Too Real
"I went on a run and bike ride with him in the morning (one after the other), knowing d**n well I don’t have the stamina for either."
- zy-raii
Financial Preparations
"I was in high school and asked this girl out on a date. She said, 'How about Friday we go out to dinner and a movie?'"
"In the most embarrassing thing ever I said, 'How about we just go to a movie? I don’t think I can get my dad to give me that much money.'"
"She actually did go out with me, we ended up doing dinner and a movie, and she dated me for four years into college. I can’t imagine why. I told her how embarrassing that conversation was years later and she said she thought it was funny I asked her out but didn’t have any money."
- SweetCosmicPope
"Purr" of the Moment
"We were hanging out in my room when I got up, closed the window, and grabbed my cat to put him outside."
"My trousers were kinda loose when out of the blue, they fell down to my ankles, and my first reaction was to cover my crotch area with my cat. I still cringe at the thought of it."
- Kiro7676
Those Dance Moves
"Well, when I was in kindergarten, I liked this girl, and In my tiny kid brain, I thought that doing front flips and back flips was very cool. I thought that was peak human ability."
"So I thought I would impress her with my very own flipping skills. Which I did not possess. So I improvised. I thought it was just as cool to sit on the ground and roll backwards. Over and over."
"Fast forward some time and my school used to have a kindergarten dance for kids who passed. Parents were invited. Your kid couldn't go unless you were present."
"I thought, 'A school dance huh? Looks like my time to shine.'"
"Now imagine you're at a kindergarten dance. You're there to watch over your kid. And then out of nowhere, you see this other kid in a tiny suit rolling across the ground like a f**king 'Dark Souls' character."
"Safe to say I stayed single for a very long time."
"That is my first memory. I want to die."
- Jokesonyouiwannadie
Very Smooth
"I was new to driving and wanted to impress him by parking right next to him in the student lot. He watched as I struggled to find where the f**king headlight switch was for the d**n thing."
"And I proceeded to turn on the windshield wipers in search of the lights."
"This went on for agonizing minutes, and I drove away mortified."
- perpetualworries
Gorgeous, Gorgeous Coworkers
"There was this guy at work, in a different department, who I saw maybe once every two weeks. He was beautiful. So beautiful that every brain cell in my head fled the moment I saw his glorious face."
"He was very polite and friendly too, so when he would walk past, he would smile and say hi. One time he did that, I spilled a whole can of red bull over myself trying to say hi back and doing an awkward wave."
"Another time I was about to go back inside when the hi came, and I was so dazzled by the smile that I forgot that doors need to be opened and smacked face first into it. That godd**n smile."
- asharkonamountaintop
Something About Pottery
"This is so dumb, but we were at a pottery shop painting pottery and talking about books."
"He asked me what I liked so much about romance novels and I said, 'For me, it's the LONGING. Wanting what you can't have, fighting yourself and the world to get it anyway. That's the stuff.'"
"There was nothing bad about what I said but I was so embarrassed to have shared that particular tidbit. We've been together for a year and a half now, he's everything I ever longed for."
- Suitable_Ad_6911
Double Oops
"Hit her square on the head with a tennis ball by accident. She had to go see the nurse."
"Another girl I had a crush on in high school. I sat next to her and could feel that I needed to fart, so I held it in. Bad move. It came out as a prolonged squeak, and she turned her head and stared at me, disgustedly."
- GrandPerspective5848
We've all had some embarrassing moments in our lives, especially around people we have crushes on or would otherwise like to impress.
But at least for some of these Redditors, they were able to turn their embarrassing stories into happily-ever-after tales.
People Break Down How An Act Of Kindness Totally Backfired And Blew Up In Their Face
It's always wonderful to see people who do random acts of kindness for others, without expecting anything in return, and generally making the world a little bit better place.
But sometimes misunderstandings happen, especially among strangers or acquaintances, and sometimes our actions backfire, even if they came from the kindest of places.
Already cringing, Redditor UnorthadoxGenealogy asked:
"What's something you did out of the kindness of your heart only for it to backfire and blowup in your face?"
Past Job in IT
"I work IT. Naturally, people call you when their computer breaks."
"Of course, once you fix an issue, everything else that happens to that computer is somehow your fault."
"Replaced a laptop battery? Well, that must be why their hard drive failed six months down the line. Screw that. I don't work on other people's stuff anymore."
- EyeOfTheRedKing
A Close Call
"I was driving into a petrol station and saw a cyclist lying unconscious on the side of the road, obviously having been side-swiped by a car. I parked, ran in, and told the operator about it, asked them to call an ambulance and police, etc."
"By this time a bunch of people had gathered around the cyclist, and while we were waiting, this woman started accusing me of being the one who hit him. Because, 'Why would you care so much about helping him unless you were the guilty one?!'"
"The police and ambulance came, and I saw this woman immediately run over to them and start gesticulating in my direction. The police came over and asked me some questions 'as a witness,' but I began to get a bit worried."
"Fortunately, by this time, the cyclist had recovered consciousness and was able to describe a vehicle that was obviously not mine as being the one that hit him. The police apologized for bothering me and said they had no further questions."
"The woman looked visibly annoyed and frustrated that she hadn't been able to get me in trouble..."
- MisterMarcus
Lending Money
"I absolutely hate it when you lend people money and then they act annoyed and twist in a way that makes you feel bad."
"Doesn't really matter whether it is a big or small amount. If I realize someone isn't paying back small sums on his own and act annoyed or pissed, when you remind them (or when they even forget), then I usually do not lend them any money anymore."
"It shouldn't be my job to remind people of that. The thing is also that you can't win with those people. If you don't ask they will probably never give it back or at least drag it out for ages. If you persistently ask, more often than not, you get some undeserved snarky remark about how stingy you are or that you shouldn't take it so seriously, etc."
"Stuff like that ticks me off, but if you get agitated then you are the crazy one because you get worked up over 'a few bucks.'"
- Invictu520
Grocery Haul
"A guy that used to work for us had no car. His wife needed to go pick up groceries. I had the flu and wanted to just sleep in my bed, but she gave me a sob story about not having any food at all (this was before grocery delivery was really a thing), so I told her I could take her for a few things."
"She knew how sick I was and promised she would just get a few essentials while I slept in the car. TWO HOURS LATER, she walked out with two carts of groceries and loaded them up. I groggily took her home and drive home and crawled into bed."
"That evening, her husband came to my house and confronted me about being 'really grumpy' about taking his wife to the store and being mean to her."
"I straight up told him I had the flu, I wasn't grumpy, I was half-awake, but don't worry because I would never run either of them anywhere ever again. Ungrateful a**holes."
- GreenOnionCrusader
Boundaries Crossed
"I had an old, lonely lady who used to come to see me at work. She was sweet and we would talk quite a bit, and she told me I was the only person who 'understood her' or 'took the time' with her."
"I don’t remember how this happened but I gave her my personal phone number for her to give me a call whenever she felt depressed or lonely."
"I ended up getting phone calls every hour throughout the night and day, which I couldn’t always answer because I had a job? A kid? I was sleeping?"
"Anyway, she then began leaving me very nasty voicemails that I had 'abandoned' her and 'was just like everyone else.'"
"It was wild."
- Starlight_City45
New Level of Friendship: Unlocked
"I used to pop into a bar by my apartment after work and met a guy named Tom. At first, it was just small talk but eventually, we started having more serious conversations, and I thought, 'Cool, a new friend.' I gave him my number and suddenly my phone was blowing up every day."
"I was working full-time and had my own life; I couldn't drop everything at a moment's notice every time he called or texted and it was all the fucking time."
"The breaking point was him calling me on a Tuesday around midnight asking why I wasn't at the bar hanging out. Uh, because I have to work tomorrow?"
"Suddenly he was saying things like, 'I knew you were just like everyone else,' and 'nobody wants to be friend.' I just couldn't do it anymore. Like, I'm sorry you have trouble making friends but being hyper-clingy and texting me 50 times a day demanding we hang out isn't the answer."
- apocalypticradish
Tough Luck Stories
"I used to be a sucker for a hard luck story."
"Oh, you need $1000 to buy a car so you can go see your kid? Sure, I got you, just pay me back."
"You need help buying Christmas presents for your kids? Sure, I'll help!"
"You want me to let you crash at my place for a couple of days while you figure some s**t out? I got you!"
"Every single one left me with no money, fewer friends, and a growing distrust of people."
- bstyledevi
Let It Snow
"Not my story, my dad's..."
"A woman went off the road & into a snow bank right out front of my Dad's auto shop, and he happened to be in a tow truck (he'd just serviced) with a customer. They went up to the lady to see if they could help, and she was on the phone with the police (laughing out loud) for a tow."
"The police came, and asked if they could pull her out as they were already there and another truck could be hours. They agreed, but they made it clear to the woman and the cop they would not be liable for anything. Just get the car outta the ditch and back on the road."
"Sure enough, after almost an hour of shoveling and laying in snow/slush to get this thing out, the first thing she says is, 'Oh, you caused damage, look, that's bent, etc., etc.' The cop told them to get the h**l outta there and he'd sort the lady out."
"Save someone a penny, and it'll cost you a dollar..."
- kittenxx96
That Mean Girl Energy
"I sat down with a girl who liked me in a private setting and explained that I was already in a relationship but would like to remain friends. She used that opportunity to tell my girlfriend (now wife) that I was cheating on her."
"This, of course, wasn’t true but she proceeded to make up a lot of s**t to start fights between my girlfriend and me. It almost ended our relationship until we had a long conversation and realized that everything we had been told by her was a lie."
"You’re probably wondering why I didn’t figure she was lying to my girlfriend sooner. That’s because she pretended to be my friend through the whole thing and would seemingly take my side. My girlfriend and I talked for hours, and when we did, we realized who was lying to us."
- SwerveTheNerve
What a Catch
"I had an ex that lost her job and apartment. I told her (she was my girlfriend at the time) to come live with me if she wanted, so she’d have a roof over her head and access to necessities. I paid for everything under the premise that she would try and find other employment opportunities."
"I even bought her a car and paid for the insurance so she wouldn’t have to rely on public transportation, considering it’s not always easy to find a job in your immediate area."
"She was banging some dude in my own bed while I was working night shifts. Kicked her to the curb, sold the car, and used part of the money to buy a new bed."
- irnbrd00
Gotta Get That Insurance Info
"I saw an accident while driving through my neighborhood. Stopped to help the lady because her car was stopped in the middle of the road. The car that hit her drove off."
"When the cops arrive, the lady told the cop that I hit her. I figured she just made a mistake but then she told the cop some made-up story."
"The cops asked for my license/registration, and it took a while to convince them that it wasn't me because I had no damage whatsoever and the amount of damage meant that the other car was also badly damaged."
- frank-sarno
That High School Audacity
"Very simple but I had a friend in high school that was very upset that she had done poorly on an exam. Like full-on crying that she might not get an A (like she did well, but not up to her standards)."
"I got her her favorite candy bar from a vending machine and hugged her and told her that it would be alright, that she was smart, and that no matter what, she did her best."
"She, very coldly, told me to f**k off and that she didn't want a f**king candy bar. So I f**ked off and had a candy bar."
- cherrybomb_777
Le Sigh.
"When I was in high school, I offered to help a classmate who was struggling with French homework. I took time every week to help her with it."
"On the one occasion when I couldn't, she told other people that I couldn't be trusted."
- StuffEmersonSays
Literally Backfired
"I have the perfect response for this post. While trying to break people up from fighting, I got my head smashed in myself. One of the two went full rampage on me, and I remember receiving three hits."
"The next thing I remember is me feeling blood drip down my face to see my eyebrow fully split open, the side of my face swollen, my jaw hurting, and my tooth broken off."
"I did not even know any of the two fighting people. Just wanted to help and have an evening full of fun instead of this s**t."
- TheEpiczzz
Paid in Good Ravioli
"An elderly woman in my exercise class (I am no spring chicken myself) who was always grumbly and stiff was complaining about her shoulder. She also mentioned wanting to get her kitchen repainted but couldn't afford it and certainly couldn’t do it herself."
"I love to paint and am not afraid of a ladder so I volunteered, thinking this was a good deed I was doing for an old widow in a small house."
"Well, when I went to her 'small house' to discuss the job, it turns out it was at least 3000 square feet with a gigantic kitchen. She also wanted the ceiling done. I had to demur, it was overwhelming. She asked if I could paint her powder room. I said yes to that."
"When taking a break from painting, she and I sat at her kitchen table and she talked about going on vacation to Ireland with her family. Wow. So she certainly could have afforded to pay someone to paint or have one of her 40-year-old kids do it."
"But no. This perfect stranger volunteered out of the goodness of her heart and got paid in ravioli. At least the tomato sauce was incredible."
- SukiSouthfield
Doing good deeds generally feels wonderful, unless something about that good deed goes horribly wrong.
And if any of these Redditors second-guessed doing a good deed in the future, we couldn't exactly blame them.
We've all known someone who tends to say mean things or generally be kind of a jerk.
And whether we want to admit to it or not, it can be fun to see that jerk taken down a few notches with a solid insult.
Ready for roasting, Redditor depressed_jellybear asked:
"What's the best insult you've ever heard?"
Not Your Mom
"When I was in high school, one of my classmates gave our teacher a typical 'your mom' response to a question without realizing the teacher’s mother had just died."
"Without missing a beat, the teacher said, 'Leave my mother out of this. I don’t make fun of your parents, and look what they produced.”
- HopeDeferred
Adoption Jokes Not Welcome
"I was playing 'Pavlov' (a virtual reality game) with a group of people, one of which was this very annoying kid who kept saying something like, 'You're bad because you're adopted,' and stuff like that."
"He did that to one dude, and the guy replies something like, 'I'd return the insult, but that'd imply someone wanted you.'"
"Had the whole lobby erupting. I don't know if it's taken from somewhere or what."
- ClaireBear13492
Underestimated by the Teacher
"Teacher of mine once said to a classmate who kept making the most asinine contributions to the conversation:"
"'You make it really difficult to underestimate you.'"
"The guy had no idea what it meant, he thought it was a compliment."
- robbycakes
Jeez, Dad.
"16-year-old me trying to convince my dad to take my friends and I to see 'American Pie':"
"Dad: So what is it about?"
"Me: A group of high school friends trying to lose their virginity."
"Dad: I can stay home and see that."
- Theromented1
Based on Real Life
"I once asked my cousin if he watched the tv show 'Desperate Housewives,' and he said, 'No, I’m married to one."
- InourbwotamI
The Joke Will Go On
"I remember when 'Titanic' came out. My grandma, my mom, and I were getting ready to see it."
"My grandpa said, 'Don’t know what the fuss is about. I can tell you what happens, the boat sinks. The end.'"
"Lol (laughing out loud). Maybe it was his delivery, but it cracked me up."
- a7xbarbie
So, Anyway...
"The best one I've heard was, ''I bet your parents change the subject when their friends ask about you.'"
- scottcree486
Seems Pretty Complicated
"I overheard someone tell someone else, They’d need a recipe for making ice cubes."
- thepiecesaremoving
An Insult for an Insult
“You’re not the dumbest person I’ve ever met, but you better hope he doesn’t die.”
- Trick-Reveal-463
"And I have the best response for that: 'Well then, I will pray for your health.'"
- Maria_506
New Take on the Clown Car
"I saw a bunch of quite pretentious people getting out of a limo at a club and pretending they’re more than they are to get in ahead of the line."
"The bouncer quipped, 'I can always tell clowns, all arriving in the same car.'"
- preferablyoutside
Signs of Aging
"Some bouncers are brilliantly witty, I assume it comes with working in a job where you have to deal with drunk a**holes all the time."
"A few years ago, I got IDed to enter a bar. I'd recently started buzzing my hair due to hair loss, yet my photo driving license had me with a thick full head of hair from several years before."
"The bouncer looked at the card, then me, and then said, 'Haven't you forgotten something?'"
"I was confused. He then showed his colleague, who nodded and said, 'Yeah mate, you've definitely forgotten something.'"
"Then he pointed to his head."
- Squeaky_Lobster
Good Luck Getting a Job
"You've got a face for radio, and a voice for writing."
- mike_e_mcgee
Girl Quips
"From 'Golden Girls':"
"Blanche: Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go take a long, hot, steamy bath, with just enough water to barely cover my perky bosoms."
"Sofia: You're only gonna sit in an inch of water?"
- LissaMasterofCoin
Randomness Wins
"Context aside, someone once told me I look like I go to the park to punch birds."
- TheRoamingWeeb
While it can feel terrible to need to be around negative people sometimes, there's hope knowing that there are some things we can say that are funny and that will relatively put them in their place.
Now if only some of us could think of the comeback at the moment when it's useful...
People Share The Things They Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life
There is so much to learn in the world, it's impossible for one person to know absolutely everything there is to know.
But there are certain things, like common phrases and idioms, that everyone seems to use that might be a little embarrassing to not understand until later in life.
Redditor Curious-2577 asked:
"What's something you learned 'embarrassingly late' in life?"
Addictive Personality
"My sister was in her fifties when she found out the meaning of, 'You have an addictive personality.'"
"She thought after all these years of therapy that it meant that people were addicted to her personality."
"We laughed hysterically when we talked about this (in a very sad way)."
- casper02127
Horse Toes
"I thought that horses had toes until I was 22. I thought the hoof was a 'horseshoe' and the toes were tucked inside."
"How did I learn how wrong I was, you ask?"
"I was walking past a cavalry museum and saw a horse statue and loudly remarked, 'It must hurt so bad when they fold a horse’s toes to put them into the shoe!'"
"Dozens of horse enthusiasts turned and looked at me with wild bewilderment in their eyes."
- BronNatsPulisic
Referencing Flowers
"The saying is, in fact, 'Nip it in the bud' and not 'Nip it in the butt.'"
- too_sharp
Pastures New
"A few months ago, two of my colleagues both handed in their notice at around the same time."
"I kept reading/hearing the sentence, 'They’re both moving on to pastures new’ being thrown about the office in the weeks leading up to them leaving, and I hadn’t heard this phrase before and thought that was the name of the rival company that they were going to, like, 'Pastures New.'"
"I thought it was weird that nobody was talking about how they were both leaving for the same company."
"I was in the car with one of the two people who were leaving and said, 'So where is it that you and X are going to be working? Is it...’"
"And just before I could embarrass myself and say ‘Pastures New,' they interrupted me and said they’re not going to the same place and asked me where I had heard that."
"I think at that moment, I realized I was stupid and didn’t mention it again."
- WorriedSoft
Mario Brothers
"I think I was in college when I realized that Mario and Luigi are plumbers. I thought they just went and up down these tubes just because that was the theme of the game."
- dontbemystalker
Bonsai Trees
"That Bonsai are not a species of tree, but a way to grow them. Any tree can be a bonsai."
- ixent
Houston, We Have a Problem
"Houston is not the name of the guy astronauts talk to."
- vienna_versailles
Cowboy Beans
"I learned that pork and beans are not called 'cowboy beans.' I was 18 and asked a grocery store clerk to help me find the 'cowboy beans.'"
"We were looking everywhere and I was getting frustrated because I know that every store carries these beans. After a while, I picked up a pork and beans can with a picture and said, 'See, they look just like this!'"
"He said, 'You mean pork and beans?'"
"Then I realized that my mom called them that so that I would eat them."
"The look of disappointment from that grocery store clerk haunts me to this day."
- whyunoletmepost
The Pulitzer
"Let me tell you about how I thought you were awarded a 'Pullet Surprise.'"
- BendyBrains
Rum and Coke
"Not too late in life, but I thought my parents were making 'Roman Cokes' until I went to college."
"Which, I think is a much better name for the drink (Rum and Coke) anyway."
- Th3seViolentDelights
Oh No, Not Acoma!
"That a coma was 'A' coma. Until I was probably 19 or so, I thought it was 'acoma.'"
"I thought you fell into acoma."
- FightWithBrickWalls
It Must Have Been a One-Way Trip
"My parents were divorced the whole time and my mom was not, in fact, taking a vacation, lmao (laughing my a** off)."
- artemus_who
Multitasking
"I live near the Hospital for Joint Diseases… when I was a kid, I thought was a special hospital for people who had two or more different diseases at the same time."
- Baffhy_Duck
Ore-Ida Fries
"Moving cross-country, driving east to west, and crossing from Idaho to Oregon, I noticed huge fields with signs for the Ore-Ida Potato company."
"So I was in my early 20s when I figured out Ore-Ida wasn’t just a brand name but was because their potatoes came from Oregon and Idaho."
- Deadhawk142
Kid Logic
"When I was really young, my sister told me she threw her guts up. So I was really afraid of vomiting my entire insides up for years."
- Presitigious_Sweet_50
Some of these really had us laughing as we realized the revelations some of these Redditors were having.
But when we're really honest with ourselves, we probably didn't figure out some of these until later, too.