About an hour and a half ago I finally felt like an adult. Sure, I'm 36 and I have a few kids and I'm married and in the middle of a divorce - I've even hosted a holiday dinner or two! But up until today I have always felt like a kid just sort of making things up as I go. Winging it was the battle plan and there was no safety net to be found. We don't have college funds, we don't have retirement plans, we don't have wills or anything like that. What I do have, though, is the ability to say my dad just called and asked to borrow 20 bucks so he wouldn't have to drive all the way back home and get his debit card.
And I totally had it to give him.
That moment that makes you finally feel like an adult is different for everyone. One reddit user asked:
What was your "damn I'm not a kid I'm officially an adult now" moment?
Here are some of the answers that we felt the hardest.
Merry Christmas
GiphyYesterday, I was asked what I want for Christmas and I said groceries.
- tyrily
Last year, when my mom asked what my husband and I wanted, we told her socks. It was the second best Christmas gift she's ever given me, the best being a vacuum cleaner a few years prior.
A few years ago my mother asked me what I wanted for my birthday. I thought for a minute and said "a filing cabinet" - and I got that filing cabinet. It's really handy.
Sir...
I was running to the train station from college and I ran past an elementary school and I heard one of the kids yell "Sir, are you running away from the police?"
She even used the formal way of "you" that we use towards adults in the Dutch language.
Trolling Success
I didn't get a normal "welcome to adult hood" transition. My parents died when I was 16 and I inherited all of their adult problems.
When they died, I didn't even understand what a checking account was, but I was responsible for clearing up the estate, taxes, life insurance, transitioning my dad's health insurance to COBRA, their finances and debts, and figuring out what an estate is, how to file taxes, and what a cobra snake had anything to do with getting a doctor's appointment.
I ended up getting most of it under control after lots of googling and Yahoo! Answers because that was still a thing.
I was cutting my last 2 periods of school because I needed to go to the bank as well as meet with an attorney and accountant, who only worked during normal business hours. I got detention for cutting class...
The attendance office also use to call me, expecting it to be my parents, telling me my 'child' was late. I kept trying to explain it to them, but they never listened. Eventually I just started going with it. In the deepest country accent I could muster "He did WHAT!!! Oh don't you worry ma'em, I'll be sure to have a talkin' to him." Then I'd purposely miss the receiver when I hung up and yell "boyy, you get your butt over here, what's this I hear about you bein tardy. You be prayin to be back in school when I'm done with you." "No papa...not the" click.
Babies Change Everything
When I got married and fell pregnant. Now everyone talks to me about adult things. They also don't tell me what to do with my money or time anymore.
If a year ago I told my parents that I was saving for a cruise to NZ to see the shire from Lord Of The Rings they would have called me "childish" and "I'm wasting my money" But now it's for my family trip it's "cute" and "creating memories". It's weird man.
Ain't No Party Like A Grown Up Party!
Had a small get together with friends. I don't have kids, but a lot of my friends do.
Set the party time for 6, thinking no one would show up till 9. Bell rang at 6. 😬 (I wasn't ready)
Kids all over my house. Lugged out my rebounder and a bunch of my old toys that I had stuffed in the storage room, they had a blast.
Everyone was gone by 10, and my house was cleaner than when people came round.
Yep. I threw a successful Grown up party.
Adult Flu
I was really sick with the flu and there was literally no one there to help. Nothing worse than getting sick in your own place for the first time, and realizing you have to get out of bed and feed yourself if you don't want to starve to death.
- Foojira
Subway Shenanigans
GiphyI was on a LA subway line and as we approached a station platform a tall homeless man was screaming and shaking his fists in the air. He whipped his head around and started making eye contact with the people on my approaching subway car.
Women and young students started getting uncomfortable and edging away from the open door. The homeless guy started walking toward us, and I noticed people glancing in my direction.
I was the man, and they were clearly looking for me to stand up and confront the situation. It really hit home for me at that moment. I wasn't a kid anymore.
Boot Camp
When I went to boot camp and realized that I couldn't run back to my parents without going to prison. Made my whole perspective change on life.
First Responder
I'm a teacher. My first year teaching there was a carbon monoxide incident in our school building. Somehow I ended up in charge of the kids showing side effects of the CO and assisting the first responders with getting the kids medical info. Before the first responders got there I remember looking around and thinking, there needs to be an adult in here and immediately realizing oh shit I'm the adult.
Pizza
When I could afford to buy pizza for breakfast, but decided not to.
- Rick0r
It's actually way better than you think. After a certain point most of the cocky shit you had at 19 is beaten out of you by life, and you learn to be responsible and compassionate.
But that's not everything and it's not even most things. There's tons of stuff you go, fuck it, I'm not doing that thing, because I'm a grownup. Or you decide you will do something.
My boyfriend ate over a mile of Fruit by the Foot in his late 40s. I have a pair of floral velvet boots. I just ate candy in bed. Being an adult is hard work but it is really rad once you embrace the liberating aspects of it. If you fight the maintenance and responsibility it will crush you but if you give into it, there's a vast upside.
Baby you're a...
Went to a fireworks store for the first time since I was a teenager. As a northerner where fireworks are illegal getting fireworks was the most awesome thing ever. Anyway I went in, looked around and didn't buy anything because all I could think of was the mess they make.
Swipe It
Signing up for my own grocery store club card so I'd use my phone number instead of my moms
I'm 25 and I use my parents' store cards because they can earn more points toward free stuff. They don't know I do this, but they've done so much for me that I feel it's the least I can do.
I've gone mad over grocery store rewards points, I'll swoop in with my card whenever I'm with someone who doesn't have one even if it's just for $3 coz 'EVERY POINT COUNTS!' Buying groceries yesterday and I noticed the girl in front of me had sneakily swiped her card on the screen as she was leaving after finishing her own transaction so she could take my points, but I shut that shit down straight away.
Mother May I
I'm a teacher. My first year teaching there was a carbon monoxide incident in our school building. Somehow I ended up in charge of the kids showing side effects of the CO and assisting the first responders with getting the kids medical info. Before the first responders got there I remember looking around and thinking, there needs to be an adult in here and immediately realizing oh I'm the adult.
My aunt (whom I always go to for financial advice as she is a retired loan officer) asked me to recommend a lawyer as my husband and I had recently used one for some inheritance matters. Just the fact that she needed/valued our opinion when hers is one I usually seek on those matters was really something to me.
Defender Of Innocents
I was on a LA subway line and as we approached a station platform a tall homeless man was screaming and shaking his fists in the air. He whipped his head around and started making eye contact with the people on my approaching subway car.
Women and young students started getting uncomfortable and edging away from the open door. The homeless guy started walking toward us, and I noticed people glancing in my direction.
I was the man, and they were clearly looking for me to stand up and confront the situation. It really hit home for me at that moment. I wasn't a kid anymore.
(Reality) Check Please
GiphyWhen I bought a f*cking Mr. Clean magic eraser. When I went from thinking the world is a playground of fun to accepting that it'll kick your ass if you let it, and even sometimes if you try not to. When I saw Happy Gilmore on the Hallmark channel. When Toys R Us went out of business. When I pulled out my N64 and put Super Mario in, and a spider crawled out of the flap the game goes into.
Security Nets
Wife lost her mother and father recently due to cancer. I'm not close to my parents and when we lost them I realized it was just us. We both make good money but having them there was a security we definitely took for granted. Now we have to be the ones that have enough security if and when our kids need it. It's hard to explain but it's like a switch flipped on inside my head and that little bit of teen angst was gone. It was a totally weird process mentally not only being a husband and father but also becoming the patriarch of the family.
Sweet Relief
When I started letting out sighs of relief when I opened my mailbox and it was empty.
- gino4130
Mondays...
Last Monday I was up the entire night finishing a paper. I then drove 30 min to university and as I put my left foot on the ground and start to swivel my right side out, I slip on the ice and give myself my first black eye. As I laid there on the ground for a second all I could thing about was, " wow, this is my life now, this is what it means to be an adult.
The No-Break Lunch "Break"
When I had to figure out how I was going to run errands to places that are only open during bank hours when I work bank hours. Had to use my lunch break to go apply for a mortgage.
I'm The Most Qualified?
The time I was the most qualified person at work a couple of months ago. F*cking terrifying realizing I was the person who everyone turned to for help. Didn't help that it was one of my first shifts as a RN. Being both responsible for patients and the folks who worked with me. Thank God I'm going to another ward soon so I'll get to be only responsible for patients.
- Lafvuli
Caring For The Elders
Not when we got married, not when we bought a house, not even when we had a baby. When we moved my husband's mom in because she makes terrible life decisions and moving in with her son was her last resort. Then her dad, my husband's grandfather, moved in too. It took 32 years to feel like an adult, but taking financial responsibility for (inlaw) family members a generation or two ahead of you will do it.
WD40
GiphyThe door was squeaking, got the WD40 from the toolbox and fixed it. Mom was impressed Dad was proud , and that was the time I knew I'm not a kid anymore.
- jcgabest
Pots, Pans and Color Schemes
I'm getting pots and pans for Christmas and I'm gutted because i couldn't pick them out myself.
I haven't even moved in yet, haven't chosen a color scheme for the kitchen .
I didn't realize how much i wanted to pick out the pots and pans until, i got excited about picking them so told my Mum i was gonna look on Google/Amazon for a cool set and she said "oh no i think Santa might have already brought them."
That's code for "Your sister is getting you them for Christmas."
I actually felt heartbroken, and now I'm writing this realizing what a pathetic old adult I am moaning about pots and pans and kitchen color schemes.
No Permission Needed
I was in a pretty good job but still living at home with my parents, and I just decided to go on holiday. Without asking for either permission or money.
The Grumpy Man
Some kids were riding their moped around the car park for my old apartment block and making a hell of a noise.
Stuck my head out the window, asked them what they were doing and if they could do it else where.
Realised I was an adult when they thought they were in trouble and nervously stopped and tried to shuffle away. I was the grumpy man who stopped their fun 😞
- DinoEgo
"Mom, There's Nothing To Eat!"
The first time I looked in my refrigerator in my first apartment and realized I couldn't whine at my mom that there was nothing to eat in the house.
- readarly
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.